#jackie is one of my favorite characters so please don't take this as hating on her

[jilyandbambi]

I really like a lot of this because I also don't really associate Jackie as an analog for society/societal expectations but rather as the group's moral compass or social conscience, to an extent.

But I don't agree with the association between cannibalism and morality. The act itself is horrible and depraved and wrong, but those who resort to it due to prolonged starvation aren't necessarily bad people. The Yellowjackets didn't engage in cannibalism because they'd lost their moral center. Likewise, being that moral center wouldn't have kept Jackie from partaking.

Because it's not about right or wrong. It's about the effects of starvation on the human mind and body. And these girls were, literally--in the definitional sense--starving.

Have you ever seen one of those old Looney Tunes cartoons where a character like Bugs Bunny or Elmer Fudd will get into some kind of predicament that leads to them going a long time without food, until they get so overwhelmed by hunger whenever they look at another character on screen they'll imagine them as like a roast chicken dinner or something?

That's a real psychological phenomenon that happens when people starve to the degree the Yellowjackets were. Essentially, your brain will become so desperate for food of any kind it will look around and find the next most-edible thing--even if that "thing" is another human being--and trick you into becoming hungry for it. Your brain will do this by inputting sensory information (smells, images) to make what would normally be disgusting, repellant, and unthinkable to you appetizing and appealing. So that instead of being disgusted by the thought of eating a person your will actively start looking a fellow human being as a source of food. At that point of starvation, your brain will do whatever it needs to do to break that taboo so that you will eat, and get enough calories and nutrients to stay alive.

Starvation and its effect on human impulse and psyche, and the taboos it'll literally--again, in the definitional sense of the word--compel regular, everyday normal people to break is well-documented. One of the most accessible books I've read that covers the subject in-depth is The Indifferent Stars Above by Daniel James Brown, if anyone's interested. But, going back to my original point--

The Yellowjackets resorting to cannibalism as a result of extreme starvation isn't a moral failing on their part. Here, I'm speaking strictly of the act itself, leaving out the hunts or The Javi Incident. To say Jackie wouldn't have partaken right along with everyone else because she is/was the group's moral compass (or as the symbol of social expectation, if that's your preference) is to frame their resorting to cannibalism as being a question of morality rather than an act of desperation. They don't choose this. They are driven to it.

Jackie was just as human and imperfect as the rest of the team. She wasn't a saint, and she wouldn't have been above or immune to the same psychological and physiological consequences that led the rest of the girls to resort to cannibalism. And, just like the rest of the girls, it wouldn't have made her a better or worse person for it. Jackie was sweet, all-loving, saw the best in everyone, and spoke up as the group's conscience at some very critical points in the narrative but none of this made her any better or worse, overall, than the other Yellowjackets. Morally, she isn't distinct from the others; they're all good kids, good people (with the exception of Misty) at the start and after their first act of cannibalism. If another girl had died of exposure and somehow wound up slow roasted instead of cremated, Jackie wouldn't have even thought to stop them from eating her; she and Shauna would've been feeding each other strips of flesh like wedding cake.

People have talked a lot about Jackie representing society and all that. And that's not wrong. But, just to dive into a little more detail, to get a little less metaphor about it all.

Jackie was *nice*. Jackie couldn't even look at uncooked/unbutchered meat without getting squeamish. Jackie would never have been able to cannibalism, never. She would have never been able to stop seeing a human being. Jackie was a deep optimist who saw the best in everyone, and she would have broken watching the other girls turn to cannibalism.

On a practical level, Jackie had to go simply because she really *was the moral compass*. Not just a stand in for society, but the deposed leader who would have said, wtf are you guys even thinking considering something like that??? She would have challenged them. She would have made them feel guilt and shame in a way Coach never could.

Jackie was never going to survive the wilderness. She simply would have starved. She might have had just enough pull to keep the other girls starving too.

[bloodyshadow1]

so the percy jackson series was good, not just decent, but genuinely good. There are 5 criticisms that I have to make though to get them out of my system. Mostly small and 1 that will hopefully change as things move forward. Please dont take it seriously, the show has been great, but there are some things I need to get off of my chest as I watch it

I don't really like how the minotaur looked. just a preference I thought he looked too bulky and too much like a bull that happen to stand on 2 legs instead of a human bull hybrid. I was actually wondering for a while if they changed things and he was going to stay on 4 legs for the fight.

I dont' know if I like Percy having Riptide at the start. Personally Percy's first training session where he every normal sword doesn't feel right in his hands was one of my favorite scenes. I like how he does have a weakness where only certain weapons, (powered by the sea) feel right in his hands while others feel awkward to him. I don't know how they would do the scene in a show where you aren't having Percy's inner POV so I get it, I just feel sad that one of my favorite scenes is gone

Chiron sometimes just looked weird. Not the actor or anything, but the way they shot him sometimes. The scenes where he's walking with Percy, when they cut to him they show him from the waste up and without Percy by his side, like they cut back and forth between the two like the two actors were shot in different locations and they are trying to pretend they weren't without digitally editing them together. They also sometimes seemed to refuse to show Chiron's horse parts, I assume to save on CGI for it, but it looks awkward sometimes because the actor moves like he has a centaur body in some of the shots, but because they don't show the horse body the way he moves doesn't look human, like he looks very stilted and doesn't move his body like he's taking steps. Combine with the first part it doesn't even feel like Percy's talking to Chiron, the centaur, but Chiron, the 8 foot guy from a lower budget project.

I'm kind of mixed on the fight scene by the river in ep 2. It was well done, well choreographed but I don't think Percy ever steps foot in the water until Annabeth pushes him. The whole point of the scene was to show Percy gets a power boost when he's in the water, that he goes from a 12 year old to superman when he touches it. In the show, he just starts to get good, kind of like Jackie Chan mixed with the first Matrix Neo. I think it's to show him as a natural swordsman, but I liked that it wasn't just him, but the powerboost he gets due to being a son of Poseidon not just a prodigy. It is somewhat mitigated by him already having Riptide, a blade that fits perfectly in his hands instead of a basic camp sword that would already feel awkward in his hands, but still, I would have preferred it like it was in the books. Also Clarisse's scream at the end wasn't great either, should have done another take. Screams are hard though so whatever but still felt cringy. Also also, the whole strategy was to put Percy on boarder patrol near the river specifically so he would have the same advantage he had in the bathroom, not just him guarding a random road on the battlefield and stumbling into the river. The strategy still works because the main goal is to draw Clarisse away due to her grudge against Percy, but it would have showed off Annabeth's strategy chops to have multiple reasons

This one is gonna be controversial because the Actress playing Annabeth is already getting a stupid amount of hate, but I do think they sand down her edges and slightly girl power her up when it isn't necessary. Annabeth is one of my favorite characters in the series, tied with Percy for first, but I like her flaws and all. I like how she stood aside when Percy and Clarisse have their first clash, and got covered in toilet water too, I like how she has a dumb little girl crush on Luke who views her like a little sister and is embarrassed to the point of blushing when he addresses her, I like how she interrogates a barely conscious Percy about something he has no idea happened. I just feel like by reducing her screen time and letting Luke show Percy around it lessens who she is as a character and sands down her edges in attempting to making her a 'girl boss.' Which brings me to the other part of the issue, Annabeth is a super smart badass and talented action girl, you don't really need to say it if you're not going to show it. She doesn't need to be shilled, the character should just be allowed to be. That's why Luke's comment about her being the best warrior in camp kind of rubbed me the wrong way. The line could have been something about she's only 12 and one of the best warriors int he camp already and I think it would have amounted to the same thing and kept things more grounded. I don't mind her being hailed as one of the smartest or best strategists, but maybe it's just me being an adult, it's weird to say a 12 year old is the best warrior in the camp where they train child soldiers. That being said, she's only been in one of the two eps, she'll have plenty of time to show off her other skills. And again I want to be clear, it is not a flaw of the Actress, it's a flaw of the writing that I hope they course correct as a book reader

--> PS to point 5 Unfortunately, TLT doesn't have that many fight scenes compared to the later books and while Annabeth is the brains behind the quest, I'm not sure if she's going to get a chance to show off her fighting prowess unless they change the books so from a book readers perspective it just feels like a tell not shown line

-> PSS to point 5. Also another small nitpick, kind of feels blasphemous as a percabeth shipper, but I think the 'you drool in your sleep,' line wasn't delivered in the proper area. when Annabeth is being Percy's sleep paralysis demon, she interrogates him over what's happening on Olympus and the solstice, it felt weird to her just standing there just to say the line. I think she should have said the line at the toilets when Percy mentions seeing her in the infirmary and asks if she's stalking him. I think changing some things around makes it feel more real and less like a line they had to say, but that's just me

Other than that, sure there are moments that made me cringe, but I'm also an adult and the show is for kids, it's fine. I think the series is great and it's only been 2 episodes, there's plenty of time to find their groove. They change stuff sure, but eh, I'm okay with most of it and even happy in some cases. Even if I'm criticizing I'll only mention it in my posts if I think the books genuinely did a scene better.

[shinycorvidae]

Character Study:

Tagged By: @smilepal

Tagging: @shitposting-for-the-soul

(Vic is in a relationship with @smilepal s Hiro and Johnny who survives and gets a body, and they are happily living together, because fuck cannon 😂)

Layer 01: The Outside

-Name: Victory (Vic, V mostly, only her dad called her victory) Devin

-Eye Color: Brown

-Hair Style/Color: Blue green curly hair, that's always up in a bun or a braid. She has the sides shaved until after The Heist. She lets it grow out to hide the bullet scar on her temple. She didn't really notice it herself, but it made the boys sad. Sometimes she will rarely have her hair down at home.

-Height: 5'11

-Clothing Style: Functional and comfortable clothing, reinforced with armor weave. Mostly wears browns, greens and blacks because she's used to blending into the badlands.

-Best Physical Feature: In her opinion? Her lean muscles/control over her body. In mine? Tall lady please step on me.

Layer 02: The Inside

-Fears: Failing her family again. Dying alone. Needles. Dogs. Loss of control of her body (bondage, drugs etc.).

-Guilty Pleasures: Explosives. They're so imprecise and generally not conducive to her fighting style but damn they're pretty. And actually physical books. Its not worth the extra money but ooo they smell so good.

-Biggest Pet-peeves: Hiro and Johnny taking hour long showers/leaving all the lights on. Improper gun/knife stance/holding. Food thieves.

hthr th door-Ambitions for the Future: For her found family to all be happy, safe and healthy.

Layer 03: Thoughts

-First thought waking up: Its not really a thought, but just taking in the soft emotion of being safe in a warm bed with her boys nearby. And then immediately "what's for breakfast" 😂

-What they think about most: Escape/fight plans. Food. Her partners.

-What they think about right before bed: Whether the door is locked and the alarms set. Then about the people she meet and interacted with throughout the day, mostly little things, like how she should fix the old lady down the halls A/C tomorrow or how she should bring Hiro to see Vik tomorrow about the slight twitch in his cyberware.

-What they think their good quality is: V see's herself as the protector/soldier since that was her role in her old clan before coming to NC. So she would probably say that her best quality is her fighting and battle planning abilities.

Layer 04: Either Or

-Single or group dates: Since V has two partners, group dates. Though its hard to call them 'dates', since its usually V tricking her two emotionally constipated boys into a nice day out that they only realize is a date when they get home.

-To be loved or respected: Loved. Vic is a soft soul. She wants to be loved. If you don't respect her she doesn't care at all unless you physically attack her.

-Beauty or Brains: Brains. Vic isn't materialistic or vain at all.

-Dogs or Cats: If she has to choose between the two, cats. She's started getting used to them since moving in with Hiro, but she didn't have any interactions with them before. Their aren't many cats in the badlands and if you do run into one he's probably a feral bastard. She's actively afraid of dogs, as she's been attacked by them before.

Layer 05: Do They...

-Lie?: Rarely. And when she does she's awful at it.

-Believe in themselves?: Mostly yes. Vic is pretty secure in who she is and what she can do. However she's had a rough couple of years in a row, and they've made her question herself a bit.

-Believe in love?: Yes. V believes in familial, platonic and sexual love. She falls in love easily and is very open about her love and tells her loved ones that she loves them often. Scared the crap out of Jackie when she told him she loved him. She didn't explain she meant platonically 😂

-Want someone?: Yes, previously and currently. She has an ex gf, Merrill, from her nomad years, and has been holding a torch/eventually dates her roommate Hiro Oda and Johnny Silverhand.

Layer 06:

-Been on stage?: Maybe once or twice she's dragged onstage by an enthusiastic Kerry or Johnny, but she hates it. She doesn't like people paying that much attention to her. She's a sniper for gods sake, she's used to quietly sitting in a corner unnoticed.

-Done drugs?: Not really. Has smoked weed occasionally with her sister as a teen, but that's it. She has a crippling fear of needles so its a literal fight to even get her to take an airhypo. Johnny usually ends up holding her down while Hiro injects 😂

-Changed who they were to fit in?: No. V is charismatic and just so fucking oblivious to social roles? rules? that she wouldn't even think of the need to change herself. Her nomad clan was a mishmash of a complete clusterfuck of personalities so she never really would get the idea of different being bad. She's also just generally awful at lying/faking 😂😅

Layer 07:

-Favorite Color: Green, like the bright luscious plant green. It was a rare color in the desert.

-Favorite Animal: Hawks. It was her old family's nickname for her, and she loved to watch them soar above them while they drive across the desert.

-Favorite Book: Watership Down. Vic loves the classics and often stays home reading while the boys go out clubbing. Watership Down is her favorite because it's about protecting clan, vicious battles and cute bunnies.

-Favorite Game: The 'pretend you don't see or understand Hiro/Johnny's blatant sexual come ons/flirting until they snap' game

Layer 08:

-Day their next birthday will be: She'll be 29 some point in November. Unsure in the exact date.

-How old they will be: 29

Layer 09: I...

-I Love: Food. Her Rifle. Her Knives. Hiro. Johnny. Viper. Michael. Vik. Misty. Panam. Judy. Mitch. Their cats. The wind in my hair. Barry. The food cart guy outside their apartment. Delamain. Oh that chinese place down the street- I'm just going to cut her off there.

-I Feel: Happy. Content. (Guilty. A failure.)

-I Hide: From needles. Hiro and Johnny are always trying to stop her from eating 'perfectly safe' food. So she hides that from them. Her sadness. Her nightmares.

-I Miss: Viper, Michael and Jackie. My clan before we joined Snake Nation. Not living in any fixed place. It was nice not being tied down to one place.

-I Wish: that I never have to find a new family again.

There you go @smilepal I finally finished 😂 you only tagged me three days ago.

[beerecordings]

How do we recognize ableist content like that? I've never been in situations like that, so something that look pretty harmless to me could be in fact quite shitty. I don't want to share stuff like that and be unaware of it, how do I learn?

well thank you for asking!!! but the first thing I’d like to do is make it clear that while I do trust myself to recognize many common ableist errors/choices, I do not pretend to be an authority on this issue any more than anyone else who’s done some research, talked with other people, and worked to recognize things. I need help sometimes too! Also I’d like to reiterate that I am able-bodied and people with disabilities are free to correct me.

The second thing to notice is that SOMETIMES these things are context-dependent. For instance, while I usually gag to see Jameson made into like the son of somebody the same age as him, if you’re actually writing an au where Jameson and maybe another character or two are actually children to another character, that can be pretty cute!!! In that case an adult is not being infantilized and he is not made into a child because of his disability - he’s being made into a child because he’s a literal four-year-old and that’s the premise of the story (and he still can’t talk). Alternatively, maybe Jameson needs extra attention and love and protection from older brothers after a traumatic event - but at some point, that Jameson should begin to regain his independence, should still experience a wide range of emotions, and should not be condescended to about his emotions or ability to function alone. However, please be careful with this… don’t use context to make excuses if you’re actually pulling ableist shit.

I think that list I gave in the post I made is a good (but not comprehensive!) starting point for some of the things to look for that are offensive to people with disabilities (some of these are specific to mutism). Let’s take another deeper look at these points:

Before reblogging something with Jameson in it, for instance, ask yourself - does this infantilize the character?

Is Jameson unable to function alone in society beyond the reasonable limitations we would expect of a person with a disability? Is Jameson babied to a ridiculous degree by the other egos? Does Jameson only experience basic emotions? Does Jameson ever stand up for himself or display “unpleasant” and unromanticized emotions such as anger, desire to isolate, desire for violence, ugly grief and sorrow, etc? Disabled adults are still ADULTS. Don’t treat them like little kids!!! If you want to portray Jameson’s trauma reactions - and you should!! he’s been through a lot!! - make sure this is more complex than just reducing him to a sweet needy baby who needs a hand to hold twenty-four seven. He should have ugly reactions too and be more complex than sad sometimes because he’s disabled and needs more attention. Otherwise you are infantilizing his mutism and romanticizing his trauma.

Does this erase Jameson’s disability completely or partially?

I have had people tell me it’s okay to erase Jameson’s disability because “they just wanted him to have a cute British accent.” I have had people to tell me to “chill out” because it “isn’t a big deal” that people erase his disability. I’ve heard people say “I couldn’t really get into Jameson for some reason, he just wasn’t my favorite character - so I decided to make him my own and give him new powers and let him talk and now I like him a lot!”

FUCK OFF M8

DON’T WRITE HIM IF YOU AREN’T WILLING TO INCORPORATE HIS DISABILITY AND YOU HATE DISABLED CHARACTERS. WHY ARE SOME OF U LIKE THIS. HOW DARE YOU qUITE FRANKLY

DO NOT SUPPORT CONTENT WITH A SPEAKING JAMESON UNLESS ANTI IS ABOUT TO SHOW UP AND CUT THAT BOY’S THROAT OR MAYBE IT’S AN AU WHERE SOMEBODY ELSE HAS THE DISABILITY BUT I’M NOT A HUNDRED PERCENT SURE ABOUT THAT ONE -

When you erase Jameson’s disability, you are telling every disabled person who might come across your writing that there is something wrong with being disabled and that they need to be fixed, as well as warping your own perception of the disabled people you will meet in your life. Do not use magic spells to erase Jameson’s inability to vocalize. Do not just decide you prefer a vocalizing Jamie.

Is this a respectful and accurate representation of a character who cannot vocalize?

If you are not disabled, you probably should not write pieces deeply exploring his relationship with his disability, because you just can’t do it right. I’m tired of seeing people write like ten thousand words of whump about how sad Jamie is about being disabled and how he longs desperately to just be normal like everyone else!! If only he didn’t have to sign!!! And he never seems to make any progress at accepting himself, he never seems to have any righteous anger at the people who treat him like shit, he always seems to let himself be comforted by other people telling him how to perceive himself instead of coming to terms with it with the help of both others and his own internal development. Incorporate his disability, and yes, it’s okay if it upsets him that other people react poorly to his inability to vocalize sometimes, but avoid stories which focus on him dealing with his disability exclusively if you are not disabled. If his disability is the only thing that ever makes him sad or makes him experience a negative emotion, you have fucked up again and you are using his disability for whump points like an asshole instead of seeing him holistically. I get upset sometimes because I see people will get prompts about JJ and it will be like… “job interview!” so they write one where Jameson gets turned down for a job because of a disability or it will be like “mourn!” and it’s about how he mourns his lost voice and “spell!” is about Marvin trying to fix him and just….. I guess it’s okay to write that stuff every now and then, but it’s a BIG RED FLAG if someone takes every single prompt or thought about JJ and makes it about him being sad about his disability.

Is this a respectful and accurate representation of sign language?

Please be aware that Jameson speaks BSL, not ASL! I think most people mess that one up just because they don’t know, not because they’re ableist, so it’s great to spread awareness! If you are writing something about Jamie, though, you really should know. You should also try to learn a little about the way people sign and just do some research! Also, when writing Jameson, be aware of the signing. If he is in another room than Jackie, then remember that Jackie can’t “hear” him. You just forgot he couldn’t talk! Double-check your work or ask someone to beta and this one is avoided easily. Be open to someone pointing out “actually, Jameson couldn’t do that, he was downstairs!” and work to accommodate him.

If I were unable to vocalize, would I be offended by this representation?

Many of us have disabilities of our own. Think about the things that bother you and how they apply to mutism or even other disabilities like Chase’s depression. One thing that always helps me (though I am not in a wheelchair!) is comparing this to people in wheelchairs. Would it be okay for me to write a fic where a person had their legs magically fixed after a lifetime of not being able to walk and then everybody liked them better and they finally found purpose? Would it be okay for me to write ten snippets in a row about how sad they are they can’t walk? Would it be okay for me to just decide they can walk now because I’m annoyed when I have to write in their wheelchair? Is it okay for me to say that they can’t wheel themselves around or that they use magic to move at all times and would not be able to move at all if someone were not pushing them or they lost their magic? Is it okay for everyone to treat the person like a helpless baby because they can’t walk? Honestly, I think we know more than we think if we take a moment to critically examine. Trust your gut.

Does this contain common problems in portrayal of characters with disabilities/mutism such as derision or lamentation towards sign language, making the character defined entirely by their disability (always a cheerful character except when reminded of their disability, for example), having other characters explain things about their disability to them, or treating the character as childish, needy, and unable to function in society because of their disability?

Pretty self-explanatory, but well worth repeating.

Do not show derision towards sign language (though a villain might, if it was clear that they are the villain and doing something wrong!). We have already discussed the complexities of lamentation and I suggest that you avoid that as well, especially if you are going to make his character flat. If you are not disabled, you really can’t portray it well, and it’s ableist to focus so much on the disability that you do not give the character any other complexity. Do not make the disability the “tragic backstory” of the character’s life. Complexity is important because it means you are seeing the person as more than their disability! You should know things about the character other than “they are happy and sweet and sugary and never get angry or make mistakes!! except sometimes… they are sad because they can’t talk uwuw poor baby” you look that shit in the eyes and you tell it to fuck off, you hear me? It’s great to have a sweet, nice, sugary baby brother Jameson as long as he is more complex than that, with real independence and abilities of his own and complex emotions and character! His disability should not be his one weak spot or his tragic backstory or some shit!

ALSO DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT REFER TO JAMESON AS “THE MUTE.”

like dude even “the mute man” is pretty fucking shifty because why do you feel the need to define him by that??? but definitely not “the mute moved down the hallway” i will block you on sight and you will deserve it that is SO offensive would you call a person who can’t walk “the cripple???”

Don’t have a speaking character explain things about disabilities to characters with disabilities. Speaking characters should not be condescending towards the character about much of anything, really, or else you’re infantilizing - if you need someone to explain things, obviously that’s okay, but do it in a way that recognizes that this is a mature and independent adult.

The character with a disability should be able to function in society past the limitations that are to be expected. No, Jameson isn’t going to magically start talking, but if he wants to go on a walk alone, he can. Let him do things like writing or texting. Don’t be afraid to give him a cool job and awesome hobbies. Let him have independence. If you can’t imagine JJ living on his own because he can’t speak, you’re doing it wrong. Look for signs that Jameson is capable of things other than making tea and kissing his brothers good night.

It’s okay to have a Jameson with a slightly childish personality, and I love it when he’s a sweet boy! But there should be more to him than that. I’m just going to say it - you know when Jameson is being treated like a baby. You know the difference between infantilization and a nice friendly man with sweet cute hobbies and interests. You can see it. Trust yourself. Don’t buy it when you see it and if you’re writing him, make sure there is complexity instead of just sugar-sweet with a sugar-sweet filling. He’s an adult. Remember that and remember that it’s harmful to pretend otherwise.

Geez, that was a rant and a half. Again, I am not the perfect authority. But there are some tips.

Does that help at all?

Feel free to add on to that if you have seen specific things in the fandom that I might not have seen or you have a disability and have experience with being discriminated against.

[fal-carrington]

Back to you Pt.3

(Part 1) (Part 2)

Disclaimer: The characters belongs to Pixelberry and as usual I'm just burrowing them.

Prompt: Relationships are build with love and patience, that's what Hayley used to be believe. Hayley and Kamilah dated for two years and half, and those years Hayley dedicated herself at the work to demolished the strong and old walls around Kamilah's heart. At one night, after a big fight, words spilled without thinking can be harsh and can destroy everything. Hayley ends up leaving the country and a regretted Kamilah behind. 7 years later when Hayley came back to New York, unexpected events can reunited them, bringing old strong feelings back. Now Kamilah has to get Hayley back, but how the vampire queen is going to do that?

April 15th. New York, Hospital Mount Sinai

Hayley's pov

"How are you today, Mrs Walters?" I touched the patient's hand lying on the hospital bed in front of me, the old lady smiled.

"You're very kind, Dra. O'Connell. I'm doing fine, thanks to your attention." She smiled.

I laughed at that as I checked her records.

"The chest pains continued after we came in with the medication?" I asked.

"They come and go." She said.

"Well, I came here to tell you that the process is already underway and you are a good candidate to receive a heart transplant, which we discussed. If everything goes as planned, we will operate tomorrow."

"This is wonderful." She smiled at me. "When they told me that a young british doctor had been assigned to my case, I had my doubts, because you were so young, but so far everything is going very well."

"I guess we were both lucky then, if I had not been assigned to your case I would not have known you. Tell me more about your grandchildren when I come back to check on you in a few hours." I smiled at her and left her room.

It had been two weeks since I had arrived in New York and finally known the so famous Mount Sinai Hospital that my father had made up my mind to take the job. The doctors were friendly and I dared to say I was already making friends. As I expected, Adrian called me out to dinner and we went out on friday, followed by a pajama party with Lily to reminisce about the old days and a drink with Jax.

I walked over to the counter where a nurse was fumbling with paperwork.

"Jackie, do you already know which intern is going to operate with me today?" I asked the nurse.

"Williams is at your service, doctor. I was about to put his name on the surgery board."

"Oh, he's good. Okay, so, put his name on the board, please." She got up and went to the board.

I took my medical records and filled them in, that was the annoying part of the job.

"How are we doing today?" I heard a familiar voice and raised my face. The hospital chief was standing in front of me with a friendly smile on his face. He leaned against the counter.

"Great, I've had three tumors, a newborn, and I'm waiting for the call about Mrs. Walters's transplant." I informed him.

"That's great. Your father was right about you, you're very talented, just like him."

"I don't think I'm on his level yet, but maybe one day I'll get there." I smiled and went back to fiddling my papers.

"Don't be so modest, I'm sure you'll be doing wonders here in a little while. We still have to discuss that research I told you about, if you're interested."

"Sure, it sounds great." I smiled back at him and he walked away.

"How awful it must be to be the boss's favorite in less than two weeks," Jamie, my fellow orthopedic chief, came up with a smile.

"Shut up, you're just jealous." I laughed as I signed my papers.

"Jealously? No, I just don't have the surname, the gorgeous green eyes and the talent of the O'Connells." He leaned against the counter smiling. "You have no idea how lucky you are. Your father is a medical legend, you are almost royalty here."

"You didn't have the slightest idea how egocentric he is. I hate it when people find out that we are related, they treat me differently. When I moved to New York and started from zero, nobody knew who I was. It was wonderful"

"Buh, now they know."

"He insisted so much that I take this job, he just made a call and put me in. I'm still doing my residency, and here I am, chief cardiologist, because of him"

"I would not care if my dad did it that for me. I'd kneel everyday thanking him," he said and we laughed.

"Have you had lunch? I'm hungry," I said, handing my charts to the nurse.

"No, but I bet the folks are already waiting for us," he said smiling.

"Are you on the night shift today?" I asked as we walked down the hospital corridors to the dining hall.

"No. Thank god, I hate the night shift. Yesterday I made the terrible mistake of staying in the emergency room, we had so many accidents, I had to fix the leg of this guy who was hit by a bus. Anyway, how's the transplant patient doing? Did not you think the catheter would be a good option, too?"

"Yes, it was one of the options at the beginning, but now it has to be ruled out. Her heart is not holding up anymore, most veins are blocked, transplantation is the best option we have"

"Are you on night shift today?"

"Yeah. I need to keep an eye on Mrs. Walters and I have two surgeries scheduled for tomorrow night"

"Good luck with that, while you're operating, I'll be at a Italian restaurant"

"You're such a bitch to me," I commented and we laughed.

April 16th. 20h30PM, Mount Sinai Hospital

Kamilah's pov

I parked my car in the hospital parking lot. I wrapped my hands around the wheel with my eyes on the building in front of me. I took a deep breath and got out of the car. The hospital doors opened and I was greeted by that smell of air conditioning, disinfectant, and sick people. That place was big, bigger than I thought it would be. I looked around, the hospital was a little crowded that night, I walked to the counter in the center of the hospital. A nurse was fumbling on the computer.

"Good evening, could you tell me where the cardiology sector is?" I asked.

"Sure, take the elevator and go to the eighth floor, go down the hallway and turn left twice, the first door and it's already here." She smiled and I thanked her in reply.

I followed the nurse's instructions, still with Adrian's words in my mind, I was trying to keep calm, planning what I would say to her when I found her.

When I noticed that I had reached the right place, I saw a nurse sitting behind a table, I went to her.

"I can help you?" She asked with a smile.

"Yes, you can. I'm looking for Dra. O'Connell." I said.

"Oh, I'll just take a look here." She typed something on the computer and looked at me. "She's in the middle of surgery now, if there are no complications, she will not be long away."

"Okay. I'll wait, thank you." I walked to the waiting room and sat in a chair.

I must have stayed for an hour and a half waiting, I was fumbling on my cell phone checking my e-mails as the waiting room doors opened. A nurse walked across the room to a couple.

"The surgery has happened perfectly, your mother will be taken into the room, if you have questions, Dra. O'Connell is in the hallway" I could hear him telling them.

I got to my feet and followed the nurse out of the room. The counter nurse saw me.

"Oh, I was going to call you." She said when she saw me approach. "The surgery is over and the doctor is... Actually she's right there." She pointed to the end of the hallway, I turned my face and saw her. After seven years, and she was right there in front of me. Hayley was on her back a few feet away from me in front of the coffee machine. I moistened my lips and followed her.

"The black coffee is a good option, but we know that you are going with the cappuccino" I said to her and she turned around. Priya was right, she had changed so much. I could see that. She was gorgeous. Her blond hair was loose, she wore a navy blue set, just like all the doctors I saw on that floor. I watched her green eyes shift from shock to indecision and then anger. "Hey" I smiled involuntarily.

"Kamilah?" She said in response and folded her arms. "What are you doing here?"

"What do you think I'm doing here? I came to see you" I approached hesitantly. "We need to talk"

"In fact, I'm very busy right now, I have to get ready for my next surgery and I don't have time to talk to you." She picked up her coffee and walked away from me.

I caught up with her before she thought twice.

"I waited seven years and I've been here for an hour and a half. So, yes we'll talk." I said firmly.

Hayley sighed and looked around.

"If you insist, let's go to my office then." She said and walked down the hall until we reached her office.

Hayley's pov

I signaled for her to enter and Kamilah did. I closed the door behind me, she looked around my office. Kamilah smiled and picked up a picture frame from the table. I swallowed hard looking at her, this mixture of anger and longing that was inside me. Kamilah had not changed anything, continued the same attractive woman, she was holding her coat in one hand, she wore a white social shirt, a skirt and heels. She sat on one of the chairs in front of my desk. No, focus. She hurt you the last time you were here, you can not just take her back like that by looking at her.

"It's so good to see you, you look great." She show me a perfect white smile, "You've changed."

"I would say that to you, but you remain the same"

"Doctor, hm? It suits you." Kamilah praised me and I smiled.

"Thank you. So what can I do for you, Mrs Sayeed?" I asked as I walked over to my table.

"Hayley..."

"Have you had chest pains, heart arrhythmia...?"

"No." She grimaced.

"Sorry, I can't help you then" I shrugged my shoulders.

"Stop it, Hayley," she said. Kamilah sighed. "I came here because I wanted to see you, but I wanted to ask for forgiveness too." She looked deep into my eyes, those beautiful brown eyes that made me sink into them every time.

"No, you're not going to do this," I laughed.

"Hayley, I'm sorry, I..." She continued.

"Let's not do this, let's not talk about ourselves. Doesn't matter anymore." I shook my head.

"Of course it does! I missed you so much. There is not a day that I don't regret what happened between us"

"You can not come here and look at me with that sorry look with those eyes and that beautiful face and think that I will forget everything that happened! You were the reason I spent weeks eating ice cream crying"

"You left me! You did not answer my messages, my calls, you ignored me for seven years!" Kamilah got to her feet and looked at me with a ugly face.

"Why do you think I did that?" I screamed back.

"We could have solved that, we could have gone through all that together, but you chose to turn away and disappear, and now you don't want to talk about it?!"

"Kamilah, I spent two years with you, two years! Our fight at that day was the end of something that wasn't working. After everything you said to me, just make me realize... That we are not meant to be. So you have no right to come here and blame me for leaving!" I screamed back.

Kamilah broke the ugly face and I could see the regret in her eyes.

"Don't say that. We are meant to be, I know that. I went to London for you"

"What?" I looked at her in shock. What? No, she couldn't do that. She... She did that?

"There was a time that I missed you so much that it became intolerable, so I went to you. I would do whatever it takes to get you back, but the moment I saw you, you seemed so happy without me... I was the one who was not good enough, Hayley, not you. "

I avoided looking at her, I didn't want her to see me crying again.

"I'm sorry, I had to lose you to realize that I had a chance to be happy and I did not cherish." On a blink of eye, she was in front of me, so close, I felt the air lapping in my lungs.

"Kamilah, go away," I said. "What do you want from me?!"

"A second chance. I want you back, I want us to be together again. I'm able to do anything for you."

"It's too late for us" I said trying to push her away from me, but at the same time I wanted her so much.

"Hayley, don't do this." I felt her hand warm, touching mine. "Don't go away again" Kamilah cupped my cheeks.

"No, I can't do that. I can't take you back." I shook my head.

"Why not?" Kamilah looked at me, her brown eyes staring into mine. Her perfume made my senses intoxicate, her mouth inches from mine.

"Because I'm engaged, Kamilah. I'm getting married" I said looking into her eyes.

"What?!" Kamilah stepped away and looked at me in shock.

[mydearburkhart]

I haven't been able to read as much fanfics as I'd like, but here are some of my guilty pleasure t7s tropes:

when jackie moves on

now, this one might not be everyone's favorite but it's mine and I'm totally chill about it. seriously, I'm a hard-core zennie, but I love post s8 stories where jackie moves on with someone else (especially when jh aren't endgame). even though there are great post s8 fics where they get back together that I love, reading a story where she finds someone and is genuinely happy is so satisfying to me as a jackie stan. that includes those stories where she makes new friends as well.

time travel aus

this one works for any fandom basically, but I love those scenarios where hyde or jackie have a chance to go back in time to fix their mistakes. although there are very few of those (somebody please write some more) my fav is one where jackie was dead and hyde couldn't stop hugging her when he got back in time.

jackie leaves point place

I know, 8 out of 10 during or post s8 follow the same background. but damn it, I love it.

fake dating!jeric

I have to admit that I have a soft spot for jeric. but fake dating jeric trying to get under donna and hyde's skin? IT'S FUCKING EVERYTHING! I just love it.

I also wanted to include some tropes that I don't like (or that I used to like but don't anymore):

hyde deserves forgiveness, donna doesn't

"I expected from him, not from you."

"hyde was hurt, but donna was just being a backstabbing bitch."

I don't care, I hate it. don't get me wrong, I'm far from being donna's biggest fan. but if she's getting backlash, he should get twice as much.

donna might have befriended sam, but hyde married her. donna might have been a bad friend to jackie, but the way hyde mistreated her was cruel.

as soon as I finished the show, I read tons of stories that villanized donna and I enjoyed them because they fulfilled my own issues with her actions (especially post-California). but, as I got more involved with the fandom, I realized that I was doing to donna the same thing the writers did to jackie. villanizing a girl for being and acting like a teenager.

while the producers demonized jackie for being a girly teen (like most late 90s/early 2000s productions), I did the same to donna for acting like a teenager. she fucked up, like every 17 year old would.

I hate it when the story makes it seem like hyde's actions are forgivable, but donna's aren't. if you want to go down that road remember it goes both ways. it's giving me misogyny.

jackie has an abusive boyfriend

now, writing abusive relationships can make an interesting story, as long as it's done properly. it can even help some readers deal with real life situations.

now, if a writer gives jackie a clearly abusive, not subtle at all boyfriend just to make hyde's actions pale in comparison, I'm not reading it.

it's literally like, "oh, he married another woman and humiliated jackie, but at least he didn't hit her."

acting like the gang and jackie's age gap is much bigger than it actually is

unless it's an au where they are much more older than her, it won't work.

I know a lot of this is because mila is 6-8 years younger than the rest of the cast. but some stories will portray jackie as young, dumb and immature, and yet will make other characters act like full grown, mature adults, even though they're teens.

she's just one year younger, like????

passive!jackie and possessive!hyde

jealousy is a valid emotion and, when written in a healthy and responsible way, can be part of a good story. but when it comes to possessiveness I'm not getting into it. I used to like possessive!hyde, until I didn't. just not my vibe anymore.

and jackie is not a passive person. that's simply out of character in my perception. like, he's gonna act like the asshole he can be and she's just gonna sit there and take his crap? oh, hell no. it's not giving.

thanks for the tag @that-basket-case hun! 🥰 I missed interacting here 💖

So last week, I read all of

TheQueensBrokenHeart works

and I really, thoroughly enjoyed all of them. I cannot recommend enough that you go and read their stories, they're all very amazing.

From my reading, I discovered a new guilty pleasure trope centered around T7S, specifically the fanfictionverse. This made me wonder, what are some of yours guilty pleasure trope from T7S stories? Actually you can mention other fandoms to, I don't mind, just clarify it so I won't get confused though lol.

For me,

That 70s Show Fanfictionverse Guilty Pleasure Tropes:

Demonized Kelso/Villainous Kelso/ Irredeemable Kelso/ Totured or Punished Kelso/ any arc where Kelso's inappropriate behaviour is NOT being enabled or accepted as him "just being Kelso". [As you can probably tell, Kelso is my least favourite character mainly because of his entitlement behaviour and lack of growth apart from season 6. The showrunners would never give him growth which is sad, he could've been a better man if they've just didn't given up on him in season 7.]

Long-distanced/Non-existent relationship between Hyde and Red+Kitty, especially with Kitty. [Mainly because I think Kitty enabled a lot of Hyde's questionable behaviour in season 7 and other seasons here and there. I know it's the writings fault but I digress]

Dead Jack and/or Pam Burkhart.

Same as number one, but with Pam Burkhart and slightly tamer undertone with Jack Burkhart. [3 & 4 seems self-explanatory but I can further explain if anyone's interested]

There's probably more but I can't seem think of all of them now, maybe I'll update once it comes back to me. Tagging

@crimsinsky @thestupidhelmet @einsteinsugly @springsteenicious @queenbookbuff @zeppelin-and-unicorns @glittermila @snookstheallmighty @scaponigifs @mydearburkhart @kim1918 @that70sshowgoldencouple

and anyone who's interested. The more the merrier! 😁