#ivy's outfit is terrible though. ugh

[vhalesa]

Diakko fe engage au for @tracedinairlwa

Since they share the same VA and all.

[theabominableblogger]

My Reaction to “Gotham” S5E3

In Which I Hand My Medical Bill to Tze Chun (and join Selina’s quest to kick the shit out of Jeremiah).

No joke, I am fending off a fever at the moment so yeah... fun fun fun...

AN:  I managed to record my reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

*imitates the Epic Voice Trailer guy doing the Gotham commercials*

“I’ll take his head and you can have the rest of him!”  OK, I did read somewhere that Sykes is gonna appear in the next episode, so that should be fun.

“Kill.  Penguin.”  Jim’s like “I have an excellent idea!  Let’s change the subject!”

*Recap shows the Green Zone*  Oh ho this place is gonna get blown up!

“Penguin did this.”  *shakes head*  No...

A CHOIR?!?  WHAT?!?

*ends up cracking the hell up, almost choking on her egg sandwich* I can’t, st-

Oh my God, of course the choir’s standing on the stairs as he descends!

This is the most extra interpretation of Penguin I’ve ever seen!

*laughs*  Wow, we have another musical number involving Penguin!  Yay!

*gasps in delight*  Edward!

“Production is steady, Mr. Cobblepot.”  *raises fist in air with mouth full of food*  Woo hoo!

*One of the choir members collapses*  Oh dear.

“Penn, why is my countertenor out cold?”  *chuckles*

AN:  Let’s just think about this.  OSWALD gathered a CHOIR for HIMSELF and is shown CONDUCTING THE CHOIR and judging by that line, KNOWS how to freaking coach a choir.  Let’s just sit on that.

“Defecting?  You’ve been holding out on me then.”  They’re going to Gordon!

“My subjects are fleeing to Jim Gordon?”  Oh hoo snap!

“What about the bounty on Gordon’s head?!?”  “We've had trouble finding takers.”  Oh my God...

No!  OK, what if Jeremiah comes in like “I’ll take the bounty!”  And everyone’s like “Oh God no.”

“They should love me.”  Mmmmmm....

*gasps when the Street Demons attack*

Oh my God!

Oh my God, protect the dog!  Protect the dog!

“That’s a good point.”  *laughs in shock*

“We didn’t really think this through.”  No dip!

“There will be plenty of time for thinking... when my men are rippin’ out your fingernails!”  *eyes widen in shock*

*Oswald threatens Mr. Penn with a gun*  Oh my God!

*gasps and reels back*  Oh, the dog survived!  Thank God!

“That’s right, Edward, it’s Mr. Penn’s head!  It’s Mr. Penn’s head!  You adorable little-”  *giggles*

My favorite character is now the dog.

*Selina has nightmares of Jeremiah shooting her*  Oh no.

Out the window!  There we go!

Whoaaaaa... those gloves though!

Also, where’d she get the outfit?

*silently jams along with opening theme*

“Word of this place [Haven] is spreading like a bad case of the clap.”  *cracks up*

“You’ve been going full kilt for months, carrying the weight of everyone.  Share the load.”  #LetPeopleSleep2k19

“I’m OK.”  Jim, I don't’ think you’re gonna be OK for the next few episodes.

“Water purification system repurposed from Wayne Enterprises Tech.”  Eey!

“Not to put more on your plate but...”  But he’s gonna put more on that plate

Jim, adopt this kid.  Right now.  We don’t need a Barbara Gordon; we’ll go with this kid! 

That’s terrible for me to say...

“I promise I will never let anyone hurt you again.”  *puts hand on chest*  Oh these feels.

*Jim gives Will some of his rations*  Aaw...

Also, I like Bruce hanging out with the refugees.  Just... yes.

“Does it look like I need rest?”  *scoffs*

“Look, whatever Ivy’s root did to me, I’ve never felt better.”  ‘Kay.

“So now I have to find the freak who shot me.”  Mmmmmm...

“Even if we find him, he’s had months to fortify himself.  We can’t go after him alone.”  Yeah, where the hell is Jeremiah?

“I won’t lose you.”  Aaaww...

“I’m not yours to lose.”  MMMMM!!

*Selina kisses Bruce*  Yaaayyy!

Also, this music in the background is so pretty!

“You don’t understand!  If you go to the Dark Zone, Jeremiah is the least of your worries.“  ....oohh.

*yells and reels back in horror when Bruce and Selina are shown wounds from the Dark Zone*  Oh my God!

Wha-wha-wha-wha-whoa-wha-what?

“PENN, WHERE THE F-“  *cracks up*

OLGAAA!!!  Olga, we haven’t seen you since Season 3!

“They happened to have defected to Haven.”  Great.

Also, Penguin, get dressed-

Oh my God, did they take the dog?!?

“Did they take my dog?”  “Rumors say pup went willingly.”  Oh no.

“LLIIIIIIEEESS!”  *laughs*

Dude, Oswald, get dressed!  Like right now!  Please God!

“Contact the Lo Boyz and the Undead.”  Wait, that’s what that Day of the Dead gang was called?  They’re called the Undead?  Nice.

“...right after I [Oswald] put on some clothes.”  Yes.

Where’s Lucius?!?

*giggles softly when Bruce smiles at Selina’s joke*

“I had a reason to stay.”  Oh my God, Bruce, you are utterly in love with her!

*Bruce and Selina find a body in a car with its throat slit*  Oh shit!

*jaw drops in horror when someone blows up*

What?!?  Are those nails?!?

*The Mutant Gang comes*  Oh my God, here we go!

Oh my God, the Mutants!

*Selina turns around to face the Mutant Leader*  OOOOOOOOHHHHHH....

*The Mutants surround Bruce and Selina*  Uhhhh...

“What do you wanna do?”  “Easy...”  You are not gonna fight them!  No nononono!

Oh, Selina with the cat moves!

*Bruce fights off the Mutants*  Oh, let’s go!  Let’s go!

Oh, go Bruce!

*laughs*  He comes in in a go kart!

“Well, if it isn’t my old friend, Mr. Penn!  And the Gertrude Kabelput Memorial Choir!”  Oh my God...

*utterly loses it at Jim’s reaction when Oswald starts calling for his dog*

“...or we will destroy this little commune of yours and salt the earth on which it stands!”  Oswald, you would not.

“You wanna test us, Oswald?  I’m sure my men could use the target practice.”  OH SNAP!

“Slice and dice, little chicky!”  *gasps*  SLICE AND DICE!

“You look like 300 pounds of ugly.”  *jaw drops*

*starts snapping in air appreciatively at Selina*

Selina, do not go off the deep end.

*Selina slices the Mutant Leader’s ankle*  Ooohh...

*jaw drops in horror when Selina starts slicing up the Leader’s face*

“Tell me where Jeremiah.. or this face is gonna be the last face!  You!  Ever!  See!”  Selina!

“Old Town North.  You wouldn’t lie to me, would you?”  Oh my God!

Oh my God, Selina, stop, stop!  You got what you wanted!  Stop!

*gasps in horror as Selina starts slicing the Leader’s face faster*  Oh my God, stop!

*Bruce stops Selina*  Yo!  The grappling gun!

Uhhhh, Bruce, you need to have a talk with your... buddy.

“I know Jim Gordon.”  *nods*

“Now, if you don’t want your men to die in a hail of bullets, you know what to do.”  Jiiiimmm...

Also, where does Jim find the time to get fresh suits?  Like, we need answers, buddy.

*chuckles*  Oh, her whip was caught on one of the cars!  Haha!

“Whose side are you on, Bruce?”  “Yours.  Always.”  Oh my God... ugh.

Old Town North... I’ll have to look that up on the map...

*mutters*  Oh, we’re like halfway through the episode.  OK.

*jaw drops when Bruce and Selina find a little prayer stand full of pictures of Jeremiah and candles*  Oh... My... Gooooddd!

Oh my freak- Oh my God....

*has to sit back and put hands on forehead in order to register everything*

Oh my God...

Oh my God, there’s like- what?

 What?  What- OK... what?  Is this a church?!?

*gasps*  Ecco!

“Welcome, pilgrims, to the Church of Jeremiah Valeska.”  *has to sit back and do resigned facepalm*  Oh my freaking God.

“The only place where you faithful pilgrims can become your very best selves.”  We’re doing this?!?  We’re doing this?!?

“Who the hell is that?”  “I don’t know.  Bet she knows where Jeremiah is though.”  Wait, wouldn’t Bruce recognize Ecco?!?

“But remember, he wants only the most faithful followers.”  Selina, don’t you freaking dare!

“And the rest of you- GET OUT!”  *actually jumps*

“You don’t look like one of Jeremiah’s worshipers.”  *softly*  Oh my God...

“I have witnessed his work first hand.  I’ll never forget it.”  *softly*  Oh my God...

Selina, what are you doing?

Oh my God, the freaking bow [Selina sarcastically gives to Ecco before going upstairs]...

WHO’S THIS DUDE [acting as a bodyguard for Ecco]?!?

*smiles when Ecco takes off her mask*

Oh my God... YEAH SHE WOULD- WAIT- wait, she would know who Selina is!  Oh my God!

*fawns over one of Oswald’s men carrying Edward*

“There are children here, families.  What happens when the gangs take them?”  “Hmmm... they’ll probably go back to being slaves, I guess...”  Hey- uh, Oswald!

*Oswald locks Jim up*  MmmmmmMMM!!

*laughs when Oswald starts baby talking to Edward*

I’m sorry, did they put a leather collar on-

*jaw drops when Mr. Penn gets shot in the chest*  OH MY GOD!

*covers mouth in shock*

OH MY GOD, they- WHAT

“You fool!  This never would have happened if you stayed with me!”  Oh my Go- OSWALD, STOP YELLING!

“Everyone hated you.”  Oh my God.

Oh my God, those are some bitch ass last words!  Oh my God!

*offers high five*  Mr. Penn!  Bravo!

“Hey, Penguin!  You got something on your face.”  IT WAS PAIN!

Please God, they’re gonna put him in the same cell as Jim

*claps hands*  Please God!

“Man, you on fire!”  *laughs*

“Take it that didn’t work out the way you’d hoped.”  *reels back in laughter*

Oh, Jim, I love you!

“Barbara!”  Oh my God, Jim sent Harvey to go get Barbara?  Oh my God.  Worst idea!

“Jim Gordon needs your help.”  Yeah, like she’s gonna go with that!

“Me and Jim are friends.”  Yay!

“We’re working for the same thing.”  Yay!

Barbara, I actually like the outfit you’re wearing.

“Penguin?  You should have opened with that.”  *laughs*

Harvey:  You gotta help us.

Barbara:  No.

Harvey:  But Penguin-

Barbara:  Eff it!  Let’s go!

“What makes this place so special?”  “Well for one thing, it’s far away from you [Oswald].”  OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

*claps hands*  Ye-es!

Will!

“Just act normal.  I know it’s a stretch.”  *laughs*

*smiles when Will manages to slide Oswald and Jim a pick for their handcuffs*

Attaboy, Will!

“We need to take them [the other gang members] out.  Right here, right now.”  *starts singing “The Other Side” from “The Greatest Showman”*

“Now how do we pick it up?”  That’s a good question.

*laughs when Jim and Oswald have to sink down back to back together to get the pick for the locks*

Oh my God, best episode of Season 5 so far.  Oh my God.

*gasps in horror when Bruce finds a bunch of bodies in one of the rooms*

*covers mouth*  Oh my God... wait, are those all kids?!?

OH my God...

Of course there’s a freaking stained glass- son of a bi- oh my God...

*Long shot of the bloody empty pool area*  Mmmmm... gross

“Six shooters.  Bang bang.”  *eyebrows raise in intrigue*

“Each of you get one gun and one bullet.”  Oh my God, they’re doing Russian Roulette?

*covers mouth in horror*

*eyes widen in horror when everyone starts pointing their guns at each other’s head*

Oh my God, Selina’s hand’s shaking...

“1....2.... chicken poo...”  *has to take a quick sigh of relief before going back to being horrified*

*gasps in shock when Bruce hears gunshots go off*

Oh mah God!

Ohhh she stopped the hammer [of the gun at her head because of her reflexes]!

“Hear that?  Curls...”  CURLS?!?  What... Curls?!?

*imitates Ecco’s little pout she gives Selina*

“Jeremiah’s methods may look like madness....”  What the FRICK happened in these three months?!?

“The rest of you.. get straight A’s...”  *has to laugh*

*Ecco runs a finger down a bloody wall and licks the blood off it*  Eeeewww!

Oh my God...

Whoaa those masks on the goons!

*Bruce goes up the creepily lit stairs to find Selina*  Wow, I love the Haunted Mansion ride.

“If it’s so fun... why don’t you play?”  *chuckles*

“Don’t you get it?  I have.”  What?!?

*drops jaw in absolute horror when Ecco shows Selina the old scar on the side of her neck* 

*covers mouth*  OH MY GOD!

“Boy do I feel it when the nights get cold...”  *puts hands on cheeks*  OH MY GOD!

*Ecco breezes through three rounds of Russian Roulette*  She has [expletive] lost it.

“You’re insane.”  “No.  I was willing to look death in the face, to allow the old me to die.”  OH MY GOD!

*covers mouth in horror*

“I [Ecco] know I want you to... Selina.”  OK, she does know who she is! 

*slaps hand on desk and rests forehead against it*  Oh my God.

“There isn’t a single part of Bruce Wayne’s life that we don’t know about.”  Ohhhhh no.

“His joys... his disappointments... his desires.”  *leans away from laptop*  Eeeuggh!

“One thing Jeremiah did teach me... is that I hhhhhhhhaaate having a gun pointed at my face.”  Holy shit!

*Selina gets Ecco to waste her shot*  Ooh!

*covers mouth in shock*

*Cat fight ensues*  Oh my God!

“Oh, puddin’...”  *gasps and reels back*

“...aren’t you delicious!”  Ahhhhh my God!

*Ecco does a few backflips away*  Oh my God!

Oh my God!

*gasps when Selina manages to beat Ecco to the floor*

“Don’t... call me puddin’!”  Oh my God!

*covers mouth in shock when Selina keeps flashing back to Jeremiah shooting her*

“All it took was a little kick in the pants!”  *jaw drops when it smash cuts to a shot of Jeremiah smiling*

AN:  Was that intentional at all?  Or...

“Well let’s see what happens when someone deserves to get shot in the head!”  *gasps*

*yells in shock when Ecco manages to stab Selina in the leg*

Oh my God!

AN:  Let’s not do a drinking game every time I say that.

*Selina handcuffs Bruce to the door*  WHAT-WHA-where did the handcuffs come from?!?

“I’m gonna do it... my way!”  *slams hands on desk with each word*  Selina no!

*reels back*  Oh my God, noooo!

Nooo...

Wait, they’re just going to leave Bruce there until the next episode?!?  Oh my God.

*jaw drops when Penguin wipes out some of the Street Demons*

Oh my God!

*gasps in delight*  Edward!

“Yes, Edward.  I killed the bad men.”  *dies of cute*

*The refugees start chanting for Penguin*  Oh my God, we’re doing this?

Oh my God.  Ya happy now, you little shit?  You got what you wanted!

“As long as we survive, hope survives in Gotham.  I think that’s worth fighting for.”  *shakes fist in air*

“So do I.”  Yes, Will!  I support you!

“You saved me and my friends.”  Yeah, where are the other kids?

*Jim appoints Will to Deputy*  Yaaay!

*Jim gives Will his badge*  Oh my God, yaay!

“’Cause honestly, I’m allergic to pineapple.”  *giggles*

Jim, adopt that kid.  Right now.

*Edward [the DOG] starts giving Oswald kisses*  Aaaww...

“Still, I hope there are no hard feelings.”  Uhhhhhh...

“You did the right thing today, Oswald.”  Finally!

*Barbara waltzes up and points a gun at Oswald*  WHA-

“Move now or you get my first bullet!”  “I’m not moving.”  Oh- ohhhh my God.

*gasps in absolute shock when Haven blows up*

*covers mouth in horror*  Oh my G- Oh my God!

Wha- Oh but- What?!?  What?!?

Oh my God, did all those people just die?!?

Wha-

God, do not let this be the end!

*gets up and walks away in frustration for a second when the end title pops up*

Oh my God!  Oh... I have to take a breath!

Bravo, Francesca!  Holy crap!  You were awesome!

*weakly and silently boogies out to last notes of ending theme*