#it. i dont watch a lot of tv and i had to babysit a friend's little sibling okay

[occasionalsurveys]

What type of survey do you refuse to take? One that has gross questions I suppose or too short.

Is your dog mixed or full breed? I don’t have a dog currently but in high school I did, it was a German Shorthair 

Who was the last person you kissed? My husband

Do you own a pair of brass knuckles? No, why would I?

Would you take back your last boyfriend/girlfriend? No, no one has come close to my Husband

Did you babysit for money when you were in middle school? No, just my brothers and cousins - I did take a babysitting class though

How did you get your last bruise? I ran into my desk at work so I have a small one on my shin

If you could go to Africa, would you? Not really, but there are a lot of countries I don’t particularly want to go to

How often do you see your most recent ex? Never, I think he lives in a different state (He was in the Navy)

Do you think you have made a difference in anyone’s life? My husband said that I’ve made a difference in his

How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday? His bday was a few months ago but he’ll be 37 next year

What letter does your boyfriend/girlfriend’s last name start with? I’m not comfortable with sharing that

Have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough? Oh yes

Do chickens have feelings? Oh absolutely, I firmly believe all animls do

When was the last time you saw your father? In September when I went to my homestate for a visit

Is it hard leaving people behind? Of course, you constantly doubt if its a good decision.

What was the last zoo you visited? A zoo in FL

Do you like crime films and tv shows? Not really,  especially not gory or violent ones

Is there anything in your possession that probably shouldn’t be? No? 

Have you ever wanted to be a lawyer? Absolutely not, I’m horrible at arguing my point ><

What was the last type of soda you drank? A mini mt. dew a little while ago

Is there a person you talk to every day? My Husband

Does one of your parents ever complain to you about the other parent? Nope

Does your best friend have a job? Yes 

Why did you break your last promise? I’m honestly not sure the last time I promised something and broke it

When was the last time you had cookies and milk? Its been a long time :/

Is there anyone you know with an amazing personal success story? My parents, they worked really hard to get where they are

Everyone has a certain part of their body they don’t like. What’s yours? I dont’ like my teeth - they’re not horrible, I just dont’ like their shape

Have you ever made out on a couch? Yeah, hasn’t everyone?

Has your name been in someone’s Facebook status lately? I think I was tagged by my sister-in-law after our family pictures in Sept - I got an email about it but I haven’t looked.  I haven’t been on FB in nearly a year.

Do you prefer to eat carrots raw or cooked? Both, I love carrots - I actually have them for my lunch everyday lol

Do you get a lot of tourists in the area where you live? Unfortunately yes.  I live in an extremely tourist-y area AND snowbirds. Wintertime absolutely sucks for traffic, especially on top of my already 1-hr commute

What artistic medium or style seems to have the greatest impact on you emotionally? Music for sure

If you make art, do you have a favorite medium or style that you prefer to use or that best helps you express yourself emotionally? I am not creative at ALL but I like journaling a lot.

What was the last new video game you were excited about? Pokemon Scarlet and Violet! But we’ve been really busy (Husband and I play it together) so we haven’t gotten too far into it yet ><

[PROBS VERY TMI] Have you ever broken a bed or other furniture during sex? Can’t say that I have!

Would you play naked Twister? I would with my husband, might be fun lol

When you die, would you rather be buried or cremated? I’m not quite sure yet.

What’re three physical features you get complimented on a lot? Eyes, smile and how small I am - I’m very petite and people always treat me like I’m younger than I am

Who’s a current friend that you’ve known the longest? Jon in 2009 through a friend from work.  Then I met my husband at a party (for a different friend group) a few months after that.  Not long after I met my husband, we go to another party together and Jon is there - come to find out they’re in the same collage classes together! Us three and Jon’s wife (who he met in 2012) have been best friends since then

What video games did you play when you were growing up? Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening, Legend of Dragoon, Tomba!, Chrono Cross, Pokemon, FF7, Dragon Warrior Monsters were my favorites

What's the most stressful job you've ever had? Now >< I work at a financial firm and the time-sensitive paperwork I have to process is super annoying.

Do you have a first aid kit at home? We definitely do, I hope everyone does

How many places have you lived in your life? Too many >< Since 2012 we’ve lived in 3 different states, 4 different apartments and currently live with in-laws until our house is built early next year.  Cant wait to finally be a homeowner and finally have stable place to live!

Are your parents dog or cat people? Is that different or the same as you? They’re both.  We had a dog and cats growing up.  I’m more of a cat person but my husband is extremely allergic to them :/

Are there sounds that bother you on a visceral level? Nails on a chalkboard or SILVERWARE.  I hate the noise of metal on metal.

Are you inside right now? If you're home, what room of the house are you in? Yes, I’m in our bedroom

Did you/will you have coffee or some other form of caffeine today? Too much >< Had coffee this morning, Mt. Dew when we went to lunch earlier today and had a mini mt. dew about an hour ago >< I typically don’t have this much!

Do you bathe your pets regularly? I don’t have a pet

When you listen to music with headphones, do you keep the volume low enough to hear surrounding noise faintly, or do you blast it? Somewhat low because I dont’ want to blow out my ears ALTHOUGH its super hard to do that with Rock music as I just wanna blast it and rock out 

Have you ever watched an anime series, start to finish? Oh yeah, a few! There are a lot I need to finish though but most I’m waiting to watch with my husband and we can’t do that comfortably until we have our house :/

Do you have a friend named Nick? What’s his favourite food? I do not have a friend named Nick.

What is the best product made from milk? Cheese!

How would you feel if your husband didn’t want to wear a wedding ring? My Husband doesn’t wear his currently but that doesn’t bother me. He’s not a jewelry person and fair enough!  I don’t wear my rings all the time either (I do when we go out but not at home) Plus we need to get him a better one anyway, we kinda rushed to get his.

What do you want your wedding song to be? “Perfect” by Ed Sheeran was ours

True/false: if it’s meant to be, it will be. I’m not sure, 

Do you feel like your life would be better without a certain person in it? No? I don’t have anyone like that in my life

You go to the restroom and you see a huge spider, what do you do? I have my husband take care of it ><

Is there a game you’re addicted to? Not really at the moment.  I’d like to play more pokemon scarlet/violet but we’re just busy :/

As a child what celebrity did you look up to? I didn’t really follow any celebrities like that when I was younger

What books are you reading? I’m almost finished with the last Wheel of Time book! Have about 200 pages left of book 14. 

Do you remember the person you first kissed? Yes ><

What does your best friend call you? He has a lot of cute little names for me :)

How many people would you say you’ve been “serious” with? Just my husband.  I thought I was in love before but that was no where near how I feel now.

Do you ever get goodnight or good morning texts from people? I text my husband both - always a good morning one (he’s typically sleeping and to also let him know that I got to work safely as I have an hour commute) and sometimes a goodnight one when I can’t go give him a kiss.  

If you could choose to be any mythical character, which would you choose? Probably some kind of wizard but I’d fight for the good side

Do you find yourself on YouTube a lot? Not really.  I just don’t have time to watch videos.  The time I do have, I spend elsewhere (like doing these dumb surveys lol)

Are you satisfied with your gender? Yes, being a woman his hard sometimes but I don’t really want to be a dude lol

Has anyone suspected you of being a different sexuality? Not that I know of

Does it bother you to have blood drawn or not so much? I dont’ really like it but I haven’t had that in a long time

What would you say is your favorite type of flower? Probably Orchids I guess  

[heyitsyn]

Oh God

TimeTraveler!Son x Haikyuu!! Part 2

a/n: hehe i wouldnt put ‘x haikyuu’ if manager y/n ends up with that certain character. youll just have to,,,, wait for the end 😏

he didnt want to lie but he had to so he could survive

hinata offered his hand to help him up and natsu winced at the scratches and the slight headache as he stood on his two feet

‘you okay?’

hinata asked and natsu nodded

‘yea, just a headache’

natsu tried to play it off as cooly as he could bc this must’ve been from the car hit before and he couldnt just say he got ran over by a damn car

‘where do you live? i can go and treat your wounds there’

natsu was about to respond but he remembers hes not in tokyo anymore and he cant just spout out his address

so he did the thing his mom told him to do whenever it was necessary

he lied

‘i-um,,,’

he fumbled for an excuse but he sighed to maintain the act

‘i got kicked out’

he mumbled and hinata had to make him repeat it twice because he said it so quietly

the tangerine boy gasped and held his arms

‘what?! why?!’

natsu sniffled

‘my dad,,,, he just,,, doesnt want me’

well, that was actually true

so a true statement could equal that lie, right?

thankfully, hinata bought it and he grabbed his arm to walk forward while his other was pushing his bike

‘i hit you with my bike so the least i could do is take you to my house and treat you!’

and that was what they did

natsu’s phone was dead even though he was sure he charged it from denki’s powerbank during practice but it remained its black screen no matter how many times he hit the power button

his surroundings was also something unfamiliar

his mother only kept him in tokyo and never took him to go visit her family because she was kicked out and had to go live with her auntie when she found out about him and his father refused to help her

‘so, sendai, huh?’

he mumbled and hinata looked at him confused

‘sounds like youre not from around here. where you from?’

‘t-tokyo’

he replied and saw hinata’s eyes brighten

‘oh?! you look like youre my age so you must have been in a high school in tokyo, right? what school?’

‘yuuei’

‘hah?! yuuei?! what is that?!’

natsu rolled his eyes and shrugged

‘a school’

hinata persisted though

‘do you know other schools?! any other school friends?! like nekoma?! or fukurodani?!’

natsu shook his head and he was supposed to be happy that he got to meet, even talk, to his idol yet his younger self was much more hyper than his mellowed out behavior on tv

‘i stick to my friends from yuuei’

‘but what are you doing all the way here?’

natsu’s throat dried up and he watched his feet kick the pebbles to distract him of his urge to just whine and throw a tantrum with the confusion from this mess

‘i dont know’

he choked out and he was so tired and confused and all he wants to do is cry in his mother’s arms like he used to but she doesnt even know he exists

hinata sensed the tension and sadness from the boy beside him and tried his best to stay quiet until they get home

to say his mom was angry was an understatement

‘SHOYO, DONT YOU KNOW TO WATCH WHERE YOURE GOING?!’

‘kaa-san i was so angry and bakageyama was yelling at me and hit me and-’

‘THAT DOESNT GIVE YOU AN EXCUSE TO RUN SOMEONE OVER!’

natsu sat there on their couch awkwardly watching the black-haired woman yell at the human tangerine

he coughed in impulse and she turned away from her son and went to sit next to the h/c boy

‘dear, im so sorry for my son and his terrible biking. i didnt catch your name when you entered, what is it?’

even hinata forgot to ask his name but thats such a hinata thing to do though

natsu froze

if he was to say his mother’s last name, it would raise suspicion that he might know her in this time period and izuku has shown him enough doctor who to show him what happens when he messes up in time

again, he lied

‘kiri,,,shima,,, natsu. kirishima natsu’

he inwardly apologized to eijirou for using his last name

mrs. hinata raised a hand to her mouth with a surprised gasp

‘oh! my daughter’s name is also natsu! natsu, dear! can you come here for a second?’

natsu heard soft sounds from the stairs and she shyly walked down 

‘come say hi’

she softly urged her daughter to come closer and the little girl ran to hide behind her older brother who gently smiled and held her hand

‘well, thats her. she just turned 10 a few days ago. look dear, kirishima-kun has the same name as you!’

she waved slightly and natsu felt his heart swell at the sight of the adorable little girl

his mother never really had time for relationships so he was an only child and never got to experience a sibling, only hearing the experience of having siblings from his friend, shouto

mrs. hinata placed a gentle hand on his arm to revert his attention back to her

‘shoyo told me what happened and im sorry that this is all happening to you’

he felt guilty at the sight of her sad eyes because this was all a lie but he knew if he told them the real reason, they wouldnt believe him

so he had to continue with the lie

‘everything was falling apart and i wanted to leave everything behind. so i just took the shinkansen to nowhere and ended up here’

mrs. hinata felt her heart tug because he was just a little boy and he was too young to experience this so she offered him something he shouldnt have agreed to but again, survival

‘you can stay with us in the mean time. our guest room has been collecting dust so you can live here’

‘what? no! i can’t!’

natsu instinctually turned it down because he hated people giving him charity

but the woman squeezed his arm to give him a smile

‘i will not allow a child to live in the streets because of something he couldnt help’

‘arent you worried youre inviting a total stranger in your home?’

but she gave him a knowing smile

‘im a mother. i can trust you, boy’

in exchange for board and food, he promised to get a part time job so he could pay her back and get out of their house as quickly as he could

shoyo led him to the bathroom upstairs so he could treat the wounds from the ground

natsu sat on the closed toilet seat while his literal idol was putting cream on his boo-boos

he still cant wrap his head with everything

maybe it was because he was so busy trying to come up with lies that he wasnt able to fully sit down and think about the fact that he just TRAVELED BACK IN TIME and could accidentally change it

‘shoyo, what year is it?’

he mumbled

‘2012′

he answered and natsu sighed but his head perked up

oh god

2012

thats a year away from 2013

the year he was born

that meant shoyo’s team manager was going to give birth to him next year

‘why? did you hit your head so far that you forgot?’

hinata joked but he paled when natsu didnt laugh

‘OH GOD DID YOU?!’

‘NO! AND STOP YELLING!’

natsu shouted, equally surprised

‘whew, thank god. again, im so sorry i hit you’

‘shoyo, dont worry about it, okay? im fine, i swear’

during dinner, mrs. hinata told him about his school situation

‘you can go to karasuno with shoyo. what year were you in?’

‘first’

‘perfect! shoyo is too so he could easily help you around the school!’

natsu nodded quietly, still out of it and his brain finally starting to accept this impossible reality

‘but i dont think i could help you with the entrance exams. im not the most-um-smartest, per se’

shoyo apologized but natsu already knew that

he was no extreme fanatic but he knew quite a lot about hinata shoyo, the player he watched during the 2021 olympics and the reason he started playing volleyball

natsu dreamed to join the msby jackals just like his idol did and eventually reach the national team like hinata did

it was during the olympics of 2021, he knew he wanted to be like him

this boy who sat next to him was the reason he came to love volleyball along with his other idol, oikawa tooru, from the argentina volleyball team after seeing that legendary match 

when oikawa hit that service ace, natsu wanted to be able to receive that

he was merely 8 and his neighbor, midoriya inko, was babysitting him and she placed him and her son who was his friend, izuku, in front of the tv where they watched the olympics match

‘someday, ill be someone great. ill be great like him’

he promised and from then on, he worked to achieve that goal 

‘natsu? hello?’

he was shaken from his thoughts as shoyo nudged him back to reality

mrs. hinata laughed

‘maybe you should head to bed early, dear. you must be tired after having a hard journey’

he nodded and was about to go and wash his dishes when she stopped him

‘no. go and sleep, ill take care of this’

‘i have to do my part in here, hinata-san. please, let me do this’

she finally agreed and he was scrubbing the plates when his mind wandered over to possible solutions on how he could go back

there was an episode that he watched with izuku that the character had to do something to go back

and he had a feeling that he would have to do the same thing

but what would that something be?

there had to be a reason he was thrown all the way in this time and it couldnt just be a coincidence that supposedly, this would be around the same time his mother would get pregnant

but who would it be?

he finished putting the plates on the drying rack and he felt really thirsty suddenly

opening the fridge, he found no water bottles and natsu had a very sensitive stomach so he couldnt drink tap water

his next favorite beverage was there and he pulled a glass from the cabinet

‘hinata-san, is it okay if i can have some milk?’

he called out and she shouted that it was okay

natsu poured the drink on his glass and started drinking it when hinata entered the kitchen and snickered at him

‘yknow, you remind me of my idiot teammate. none of my other friends drink straight milk except for him’

natsu placed the glass down and wiped his lips

‘chocolate milk make me sick and i hate the taste of flavoring in milk. but i just hate flavoring in general. except for gari gari popsicles, those are good’

natsu reasoned, watching hinata move across the room to get an apple

‘still ew. but come on! lets go to bed so i can show you around school early before practice tomorrow!’

natsu noticed his excitement by the way he bounced in place and he chuckled

it reminded him of his friends mina and denki

hinata led them both to his room so he could check his wounds again just to make sure

then something caught his eye

‘kirishima-kun you like volleyball?!’

that threw him off

partly because he wasnt used to being called by his friend’s last name

but also because of the question

‘huh? how do you know that?’

natsu asked, almost defensively

hinata shrugged

‘i saw your volleyball shoes in your bag’

hinata reasoned and excitedly pointed at them

‘you should play for us! im part of the team too! oh oh! what position do you play?!’

‘l-libero’

natsu stuttered out, slightly overwhelmed by hinata’s energy

hinata started circling him, inspecting his height and looking at him up and down

‘yanno, kirishima-kun, youre really tall. like much taller than the rest of my club. maybe not saltyshima but really!! youre so tall!!’

hinata whined in envy and natsu laughed

‘blame it on the paternal side of the family. my ma isnt really tall’

he laughs but then memories of his mother resurfaced and he suddenly felt gloomy, guilty, even, bc he doesnt know if time stopped there or it kept going and if so, shes probably worried sick

and he knew she was always one who blamed herself

hinata noticed his downcast expression and thought he probably remembers his dad and got sad since he got kicked out

so our baby sunshine freaked out and he frantically waved his hands around

‘oh no! gomen kiri-kun! gomen! i really didnt mean to make you think about him! gomen!!!’

he even bowed which surprised the h/c boy and made him stand back up

‘o-oi shoyo! dont! you didnt because i wasnt thinking about him!’

he fussed and patted hinata’s hair

‘i dont care about him. to be honest, there isnt much to think about’

he didnt think about what he said until he heard himself

natsu’s eyes widened, fearful of how hinata could take it but he flinched when the orange-haired boy’s eyes were filled with his own tears

‘OH NO!! KIRI-KUN!!!’

then launched another series of apologies and natsu had to calm him down

oh dear

it was early in the morning like 5 when hinata bursted into natsu’s room

the loud shout of shoyo made his eyes blink open and he groaned before turning to the side

‘come on, kiri-kun! we need to go to take your exam!’

‘nooooooooo’

‘yeeessssssss’

it was quite a battle for hinata to even just get natsu out of bed but he managed to bribe the latter with some milk bread from the bakery down the street

‘2′

natsu showed his two fingers and hinata sighed before nodding

‘yes. now go hurry so we can leave!’

dressed in his grey sweatpants and a yuuei sweatshirt, natsu cursed as he only has clothes good for 2 days and he didnt want to bother the hinatas so he was at a loss

mrs hinata bid the two boys good bye and natsu was yawning and dragging his body to walk while hinata was skipping over to his bike

then he finally realized the problem

he nervously looked at natsu and the taller boy didnt understand why he was looking at him that way

‘what?’

shoyo pointed at the bike and awkwardly smiled

‘uh,,, you see,,, i dont think youd,,, fit,,, at the back seat’

natsu shrugged

‘then ill bike. ive done it before’

he sauntered over to the bike and swiftly lifted his leg before testing out the brake handles

‘its good and better than mine back home’

‘a-are you-’

‘sit down, sho’

hinata gripped on to the back of natsu’s sweatshirt as he told him the directions to how to get to the school

natsu remembered watching an interview of hinata talking about his high-school life and he remembered the star player talking about his dedication to go to karasuno everyday for volleyball

and the boy couldn’t believe hes doing that right now, with his idol literally behind him, and driving to the legendary karasuno high school

from the jackals to the adlers and even some other teams like the frogs, natsu cheered for them

there was a memory of his mother sitting with him on their couch during one of her rare day offs as they rewatched the recorded copy of the olympics

it has become natsu’s favorite thing to watch

‘with great talent comes great hardships. people don’t become good overnight and i watched those people suffer through it all but look where they are now’

‘KIRISHIMA, WATCH OUT! COWS CROSSING!’

natsu was snapped out of his thoughts at hinata’s shout

then it morphed into pure and utter confusion

‘cows?’

shoyo laughed

‘since youre from the city, this must be a weird sight for you, huh? well, in the countryside, this happens a lot!’

but natsu didnt mind

in fact, he loved cows

he loved any farm animal in general

maybe it was his upbringing in the hustle and bustle of the city that he grew to love the countryside

shoto took him with his family to a trip to the country once and he remembered loving the smell of grass

they were able to do an activity in a farm where they worked in a rice farm and the peace and serenity was something he will always remember

his mother was lucky she grew up in a place like this

‘kiri-kun, ive been wanting to ask, how is your volleyball team in the city? are you a powerhouse?’

natsu felt pride bubble up in his chest

‘of course! we got second place in nationals!’

he boasted and blurted out before he could stop himself

then he felt fear

he shouldnt have said that because for all he knows, yuuei probably doesn’t exist at this time period

hinata had a different reaction and his eyes shone

‘WHAT?! WOAH! SO COOL! I HAVE TO TELL OUR CAPTAIN THAT WE’RE GETTING A POWERHOUSE STUDENT!’

‘uh-i-uh-’

natsu didnt know what to say because he had a feeling he definitely just did an oopsie

so he switched topics really quick to divert the attention away from his past

‘o-oi sho, once youre done being a pro volleyball player and stuff, we should have our own rice farm’

of course it was such a random idea but it distracted the orange boy

hinata shrugged

‘i mean,,, i have to be a pro first but i guess we can!’

‘hmm,,,, i dont think you have to worry about that’

.................................................

taglist:

@hartbeat-art​ @yakus-yakult​ @nerdyphantomlady​ @jollycowboysaladhero​ @cynicallychaotic​ 

a/n: oh god this sat in my drafts for so long and i really dont know what im doing like i kinda have a rough outline of what im doing but im just going with the flow but i dont think the flow is quite flowy 

[thepunmaster]

octonauts and minecraft

....octocraft? minaughts?

[janeyseymour]

me shitting on my shithead ex

TWs: abuse, domestic violence, manipulation, panic attacks, probably others... so if this doesn't sound like something you wanna read, feel free to skip.

it’s literally just me bitching about my shithead ex. Mum is not “Mum” here. I’m a cold, bitter person in this. I let my rage out, and truly channel a bitch here. 

Alright listen up mama has a lot of ✨trauma✨

Sooooo…. My life is one big trauma and I love that for me lmao

My family life was shit for a while, and I was a whole shitshow in myself until… well I’m still a shitshow honestly, but uh, we can dive into that another time if you want lmao I have enough baggage to share with this story right here. My family situation is a whole other story lmaoooooooooo 

Well, senior year I meet this boy. And he was real sweet (this is shithead ex).

We dated for 2 1/2 years. 2 1/2 very long years. I wore rose tinted glasses for the first year and a half. Like I said, he was sweet.

Well, for the first 9 months that we dated, he didn’t have a job. He ended up getting a job at a local deli… only to lose said job 2 months later. For the next however long we dated, mans went through 5 other jobs… dick’s sporting goods, a waitress at a local restaurant, real estate agent, caretaker of dogs, and finally working with his father who said if he wasn’t his son he would have fired him too. 

Mans also “went to college” for a semester, failed, and told me that he didn’t know why he wasn’t getting his grades… man didn’t attend classes, didn’t pay for said classes and failed… that’s why.

I was able to overlook this for a while. 1 1/2 years actually.

Well, rose tinted glasses came off on my 19th birthday. My friends wanted to hang out, and he literally stopped me from going. I wasn’t allowed to see my friends because “I don’t like your friends” okay well I didn’t fucking ask… “You’re gonna fuck them” … no I’m not??? They’re like my brothers, and I was in love with him… not them??

All we did was fight from then on… things like “you’re not allowed to wear that… other boys will look at you…” “why would you wear that out? you look like a whore” “why do you insist on eating healthy can’t we just get a burger and be done” “you shouldn’t drink all of that coffee it's bad for you” “why cant you ever stay awake?” “you’re letting yourself go.” “are you fucking kidding me”

Manipulation was strong. I tried to leave so many times but couldn’t. It was the “I can’t live without you babe” and “No one would ever love someone as broken as you”

I was abused for the last year of that relationship because I was so scared that I wasn’t good enough and I would never be capable of being loved again. Because well, he loved me, right? If I left… I don’t really know. (LMAO I really am Jane in this way… and he truly was my HenRat)

And then it got physical. I was going to school full-time, working crazy amounts of hours at my job, and really only had time to see him late at night after work. We would settle in on his couch, and I would either do homework or we would watch television. He didn’t like when I did homework. Oftentimes when we would watch tv, I would fall asleep. I was EXHAUSTED. 18 credits worth of school and babysitting and working at a gym almost full time is a hard feat, let me tell you. He didn’t like that. He would shake me awake. Now, I don’t bruise. I just have a skin complexion where I dont bruise. I would fucking bruise… and he knew it. I would tell him it hurt me. He would do the usual “oh baby I’m so sorry it won’t happen again” only for it to happen again. This led to panic attacks... terrible anxiety. 

And then it was the “come on babe we never do anything anymore” to which I would reply with “can we please just not? I’m tired and I just want to relax”… and he wouldn’t take it for an answer. Rough nights for me… physically, mentally, emotionally.

It took me a year to get out of that relationship. Now, for being as young as I am… that’s a long time. Covid hit, we were all quarantined, and I stopped seeing him (even though I was working in public) because “my dad is high risk”. Best two weeks of my life, not having to see him. I didn’t FaceTime him, I barely even talked to him other than “morning” and “goodnight” texts. I drove to his house one day after work and literally said “we can’t keep doing this. We’re both miserable, and I can’t do this anymore. We have to break up.” And I drove away and never looked back. And I don’t regret it one bit. I do regret not getting out of that relationship sooner.

That being said, it has left me royally fucked. I see every red flag, every hint of any red flag, and I refuse to put myself in that situation again.

I’m genuinely content with the progress I’ve made on myself, and I refuse to let anyone ruin the progress I’ve made.

So, thank you shithead ex for more trauma to add onto my already extensive list of traumatic things that have happened to me. You truly deserve to get wrecked, and I am so much better off without you. I’m better than I ever thought I could be. truly, get fucked. 

Despite all of the absolute SHIT I’ve been put through in this very short time I’ve been alive, I still do my best to come out of it stronger, better, and with as much love in my heart as I can (although I guess it’s pretty ironic i say this considering this is just one big rant about how I fucking hate someone)

[star-anise]

I think I am having vicarious stress about how immagrint families are being treated at the American border too. Also other horrors happening in America though I live in Canada. How do you cope with that? If this question is annoying or personal you dont have to answer. Is it weird to feel post election stress after the 2016 election although I am not American? I heard American college kids had almost ptsd levels of trauamtic stress after the election in America.

It’s funny, today I was on the phone with a grad school friend who does front-line crisis mental health work in the USA, and grew up being heavily involved in the Democratic Party. She said, “I have such an issue with this rhetoric now, like, ‘don’t look away.’ Bitch, I haven’t looked away for two years. I’m fucking exhausted.” Because things like that are intended for the people who do look away, who are conservative and apathetic, but often they only reach an audience that is already engaged with the issue, and they land like hammers on people already trying their hardest.

And yes, freaking out about the shit that goes down in the USA is a fine old Canadian tradition. To quote Pierre Trudeau’s 1969 comments to the US president at the time: “Living next to you is in some ways like sleeping with an elephant. No matter how friendly and even-tempered is the beast, if I can call it that, one is affected by every twitch and grunt.”

(And Canadian politics are definitely negatively affected by the USA. My province just lost its NDP government because its Conservatives “aren’t as bad as those crazies down south!” and I have a sinking feeling the Cons will cakewalk to federal victory too in October)

You might also notice that on my blog, I post about political issues in only a small number of cases: 1) I have a unique observation I think needs to be added to the world, 2) It’s an issue I genuinely haven’t seen covered yet, and I know people who would want to know; 3) It’s a feel-good story meant to comfort people who are fighting the good fight; 4) It’s advertising an immediate, low-barrier thing people can do right away to directly affect the situation; 5) It’s a resource to help those fighters be better activists. And I do my best to always tag political posts with a standard set of tags to let people ignore them, so if somebody wants, they can follow me and just get my cats’n’fandom content.

The audience I usually have in mind when I blog are people like my friends: Smart, compassionate people committed to social activism, but without limitless amounts of money, health, time, or attention. Some of the people who follow my blog are DC lobbyists directly fighting the Trump administration’s policies. Some of them are crisis workers and EMTs and librarians and deal with the ragged edges of human existence in today’s society. I know I don’t have the nerves or capacity to be their news source; they can follow anyone else on Tumblr for that. So what I try to be is the friendly cat cafe they can go to at the end of a long shift to relax.

My response is really guided by a blog I followed a lot when 9/11 happened; I was following it to learn about getting published as a fantasy author, but its authors were New Yorkers and socialists and military veterans, and they had a lot to say about the false witch hunt for a justification for starting a war in Iraq in 2003 and the slow erosion of rights and freedoms of Americans and “enemy” POWs and the incredible damage the American war machine does when it gets going.

They’re not blogging as much now, but when Trump was elected, they released two posts that I found to be deeply useful:

Defense in Depth - Tl;dr: It is important that those of us in resistance to the world’s outrages don’t attack each other for having different priorities, because we need a diversity of targets and approaches.

Taking It Back - Tl;dr: Our enemies WANT us to be overwhelmed and horrified and frozen in shock and catatonic. That is a deliberate tactic they use. Whenever we seem to catch our breath, they create a new outrage for us to get upset over. We need to learn how to set our own pace, resist the lie that you have to be upset and horrified all the time, and focus on taking care of yourself.

I’m also really affected by Rebecca Solnit’s book “Hope in the Dark” where she points out that activist movements have two effects. The first is to influence whatever issue they’re actually agitating about. The second is to give people the tools and experience they need to become citizens who change their societies in deep and enduring ways.

One part of the problem is finding ways that you can make the world better that feel really concrete and achievable. That’s a whole other discussion, that depends a lot on what you’re good at, what your resources are, what you’re capable of. People feel a lot less terrified if there’s something they know they can do. 

But even once you’ve figured out how you’re fighting to make the world better in some small way, you probably can’t do it 24/7; you’ve got to keep mentally resilient the rest of the time.

So what do I do to cope?

I focus on easy-to-do, ordinary hobbies that bring me joy, especially ones that get me off my computer and out of my head. I garden; I just bought a bike; I’m getting my sewing room back in order so I can go back to making costumes and working on the @betterbinderproject.

I make sure I keep social connections where we can relax and enjoy each other. That means being codependent with my cat, babysitting my nieces and nephews, exploring my local bi/pan meetups, going to historical re-enactment events, texting with my friends about Tumblr drama, talking to my colleagues during slack moments at work, and enjoying the fandoms and fanworks that bring me joy.

I do my best to look after my physical wellbeing. Which for me means stretching, yoga, taking my psych meds and vitamins, taking painkillers, looking after my cuticles, using moisturizer, braiding my hair, getting massages, and always making sure there’s a cake in the kitchen. My emphasis isn’t whether I’ll get some disease 30 years from now; it’s making sure that inhabiting my body today is the least unpleasant that it has to be.

I try to look after myself; I go to therapy, look for jobs, keep up on my business paperwork, budget my money, work on upgrading my skills, and develop my 5-year plan. I work really hard on doing this without being stressed, because my habit of procrastinating and only getting around to this stuff when I’m in abject terror isn’t good.

I also, and this feels weird to say or suggest, try to educate myself on issues that are not the crisis du jour. I watch TV shows about the Russian revolution, listen to books about Indigenous language reclamation, read the diary of a World War II servicewoman. This isn’t an attempt to expand my list of crises to worry about, but because I find my ability to cope with the present immeasurably helped by knowing that people have faced other, different crises, and how they dealt with them. It’s… background research in resilience. With the added bonus that it helps me stay intersectional and aware of when we might be only seeing the most privileged part of a crisis situation.

[thelittlehansy]

Prince Thimothee of the southern isles.

Some random part of that tv show idea i ve got in my description in fanfic style not script  that i m procrastinatating to wrote since 5 years  😂this is like episode 2 or 3 lottie meet one of the prince of the southern isles and suddenly...well its love at first sight. writing is also a way to improve my english so well thanks to anyone who may read this and sorry for the painful grammar XD

A place amoung others in the hotel was a restaurant that was not indifferent to lottie. 

Not only Tiana had take an opportunity to work here as a way to cope with the strange curse that had send them here but there was also a part of the restaurant that was mean for  musician group that lottie was liking a lot.

This evening was particulary enjoyable for lottie. The music was sounding great she was chatting happy with Tiana and Aurora when suddenly something had crossed her heart at the minute she saw the new singer who was making the show. 

Curly auburn hair , mysterious chocolate eyes , this man was strange. He was mysterious but at the same time lottie could tell from his face that he seems to be kind. She must have been too much concentrated on that guy for she hear tiana and Aurora laughed amused.

« Lottie... » she heard  Tiana chuckled.

«  i think she is having a crush on prince thimothee » Aurora added in a whisper.

« Prince ? He is a prince ? » lottie asked at the same time shocked and euphoric this man who was singing in front on her ,this stunning god was a prince ? She looked a little better at the man. His pants was not the same as his shirt. When the shirt was definitely an outfit he buy like everyone else here to fit with this world clothes brand. the pants was more fitting the brand of the southern part of the first continent of their  world. Finally she catch it the Symbol of the southern isles royalty on the top of the pants. She laughed.

«  oh my god this is one of the princes of the southern isles !!!! » she claimed. As aurora and Tiana laughed with her.  

Her  best friend added «  sorry lottie he is 11th in line ». Lottie  burst out laughing ,  her dream and fantasm of marring a prince and be a princess was something that she made public knowledge amoung her friends and if she had to be honest she liked playing the role of the superficial girl that had  always dream to marry a prince. it was funny and her friend were knowing perfectly who she was. Yes she was blond ,she was rich , and she was having strange dreams but Tiana her best friend and her others friend were knowing perfectly that she was a very faithful friend who was kind and gentle. she was interrupted again in her  daydream by Tiana

« Lottie you are literally watching him since 2 minutes » she laughed

«  well when I see a goergous piece of art how can I not look at what I see » they both burst out laughing with aurora who finally added a little more information.

« I m sorry lottie but all the princes of the southern isles are married with children except for prince Runo prince Rudi wich is engagment was call off and Prince Hans » the news hit lottie pretty hard for she makes a face that makes her friend laugh even more. Upset she added :

«  so I only have a choice between the ones surround by negative gossip  and....Prince hans » she makes a grimace. Hans even though was 13th  in line had makes himself very popular for his crimes in arendelle. he was a selfish entitled murderous asshole. 

it was not a surprise him and his twins brothers are not married. In fact the contrary would  have be extremely shocking and surprising. She wished for one second no any women will have the misfortune te to be married to such men. Prince hans at least , they still didn’t knew if Rudi and runo were as horrible as the gossip about them. 

Generally rumors twist reality , at least with Hans the existence of fact where proving how an horrible human being he was.  He had left his  fiance to died , laugh at her misery trying to murder for power. This quote he said to her also “ oh anna if only there was someone out there who loved you” has spread very fast in the continent. all of these was only showing the cruelty of the character of his royal highness Prince Hans Westergaard of the Southern isles.

 She was going to serve herself an other glass of this very tasteful juice when a   hand touch accidently her   

«   I m sorry » the person said.  She raise her head and suddenly noticed prince thimothee ! 

Prince timothee was the one who touched  her hand  ? not wanted to sound like a fan girl she nervously brushed her hair ,  when  a magnicent smile with dimple crossed his royal highness goergous face.   Her heart melt a little more « it’s alright » she said with a huge smile.

 Confident , she finally decided to talk to him «  you have an amazing voice your highness you makes a great show I m sure a lot of person here enjoy it a lot » she smile her confidence disappearing  suddenly he was royalty maybe he was finding her a bit too familiar.

«  really ? » thimothee said «  thanks you thanks you so much generally I m all the time compared to my triplet brother » he laughed not convinced of her compliment. “ your triplet brothers” lottie replied surprise. “ yes we are triplet that dont look like each others like our twin brothers” she notices the two men on stage who must be his brothers. There were Indeed not looking exactly like each other’s but we still could tell there were brothers.

She smiled happy to chat with him “ its true Rudi and Runo have nothing at all in common physically !”

«  I m sure you have our own skills and talent that cannot be compare to your brothers » she reasured him.

« Thanks thanks you so much what your name ? »

« Charlotte labouff ! I m from the second continent new Orleans ! She said happy to present herself to the prince and way too much excited.

«  it’s a pleasure prince thimothee of the southern isles » he Bowned and paused a kiss on her hand. «  to another time miss labouff »  on these words the prince left her.

She heard aurora and Tiana not convinced by the prince charm «  what he didn’t said to you is that he has a wife” 

“he has a wife !” lottie repeat  finally sad. 

“I m sure he is the kind to flirt around even when married » Tiana said 

«  oh that will be so sad I hear he got 3 kids ? »  Aurora said 

«  yes naveen told me two babies and one who is 4 years old »  speicfied tiana.

Lottie looked a little better at the direction the prince took there was indeed a little kid next to thimothee

 « the question I asked myself is why  they take some of their kids at this ball now look at the disaster only 2 princess of the southern isles went to the ball and now several of these poor kid are away from their mothers » aurora said. 

Finally she saw a man tooking the small child  with him approaching  from lottie Aurora and tiana table. She smiled to who must be prince thimothee kid. The boy replied with a little malicous smile. she looked at him again the poor little boy was so lost and tired from all these mess. he must be terribly miss his mommy she thought.

«  if you want to babysit him I will not said no ! When you are having more than 10 nephews and nieces and most of their mother are missing this is a hard time »  she heard the man visibly piss off  told her. The men was the uncle of the boy ?  a prince of the southern isles ? 

He replied to her internal monologue  «  prince klaus of the southern isles...”  bitter , cynical and unfriendly withtout any smile prince klaus said : “  Not hans brother , neither number 6 please »

She offered the prince an other  smile and bow the best she can. Lottie  was sure he was the kind of royalty to claim everything as a disrespect again his own person. This one was also very handsome not as much as prince thimothee but still pretty good looking. What struck her the most was how much cold and arrogant he sounded. 

. « He must missing so much his mother » lottie said sad for the little boy  and his cousins who went at the ball.   « His father too must miss her terribly... » she added thinking about his wife  putting to the side her little crush on prince thimothee she did not realize the horror its must be for the princes to be away from their love one.

Lottie was missing a lot her father and there were there only since nearly one week.  the prince of the southern isles them were having a enormous family and more people to missed terribly.

The prince chuckled «  no I can tell you my brother prince thimothee does not miss his wife neither my sisters in law”

“ love does  not exist in the southern isles »  he added while drinking bitter his glass.

«  really ? » aurora lottie and Tiana asked shocked by the prince declaration. The 6th prince of the southern isles  « my sisters in law...they must be throwing a big party in our castle right now  ! this is only politic for my father ! 

In one instant after the prince left  ,  lottie went back to her intial very exited mood  that  Tiana , with rationality interrupted : 

«  lottie.  please i got the feeling prince thimothee is not as charming as he may seems to be ». «  maybe he is » she said a huge smile on her face. When aurora finally left  Tiana paused a very friendly hand on her shoulder «  I m here for you and I will always be here to help you achieve your dream just like you were there for me  !  just take me aware so I know if have to protect my best friend » she laughed and hug lottie very tight. 

 small tears fell on lottie face that crossed the smile she was having as hugging her best friend. «  tia you think we are gonna go home ? I miss daddy and Eudora and this is still only one week  we are here » 

«  I m sure  , aurora  told the fairies are working days and days they are gonna find a curse to make us go back home » finally Tiana  leave busy to take care of the closure of the restaurant. 

Alone on her chair she realized , her belly , it was as it it was full of buterfly prince thimothee has make a big impression on her. lottie was feeling it , her intuition was screaming at her that he was ineed a true good man. and now what does she hear ? his wife must be very happy to be away from him right now ? that they only married for political reasons ? Suddently it was like her hopes and dream could be real. Maybe she could have a love story with prince thimothee ? He seems to have like her when they very briefly meet ! or maybe she could even achieve her big dream she had hope since little be a princess ? she laughed she was defintly too much crazy this will never happened. 

She was also not in any way a gold digger no ? she genuinly  wanted to know better  that 11th prince of the southern isles. He seems so nice and kind lottie thought. 

finally her hapiness disapeared  the prince were not making a lot of appeareance since there were there.  they were mainly in their part reserved for the southern isles big family in the hotel. she also didnt wanted to pass for some crazy annoying fans of the princes of the southern isles.

no she needed someone to present her to the prince.

Someone that was also way more approchable ,  than was each days at the bar of the restaurent unlike his brothers.

Someone who  in those bunch of handsome fella was willing do to the worst stuff if it means gain what he wants. she needed to promise him something that was interesting him and what everyone was missing there was money. Prince Henry who had been assigned the role of the leader of the hotel by the curse had already  give  her some part of money. After all she was having food and a bed here ? she could give  him the money and  instead he could makes her meet prince thimothee and assure the communication between them. 

she smirked when she saw her prey  from the distance , His Royal Highness Prince Hans Westergaard of the Southern isles.

[spooks-can-write]

The Babysitter

Nestor x Reader

Summary: Emily hires you to babysit Cristobal (this is apart from the actual tv series events) and you and Nestor have some...tension. im bad at summaries ok.

Warnings: no smut just tension lmao. Cursing. Some predatory behavior, nothing beyond that.

Word count: idk tbh its longER tho bc i cant be short im s o r r y.

Hope yall enjoy 💞

The door chimed as you walked into the coffee shop, immediatley seeing Emily beam as she saw you made you loose a tension you didnt know you were holding. After leaving your last job abruptly you had been busy trying to get your shit together and through the struggle you were glad to take a break to see your old babysitter and childhood friend Emily.

"Hey (y/n)!" She stood up, you noted motherhood suited her well. She seemed more at peace now.

"Hey Em!" You looked down to see Cristobal sweetly sleeping in his noteably expensive stroller.

"So..." she seemed eager "I was talking with Miguel and we know you're...well...looking for a new job and place to stay so we thought it'd be perfect if you stayed with us as Cristobals full time nanny."

You were caught off gaurd to say the least "Oh, uh that does sounds great but i dont have any experience really."

"Dont worry well figure it out and ill be there in the beginning till you settle in. Trust me."

You thought you didnt have many other places to go either way and being in a stable enviornment would be good for a change. Fuck it.

"When can i start?"

Nannying was going better than you thought. It helped that Cristobal was more than well behaved but also you kind of had a knack for it. Not to mention the mansion Emily lived in. The only problem from time to time was that asshole with the cornrows. He always blatantly ignored you or just stared at you until you left the room. You thought long and hard about what you did to piss him off and couldnt think of a single thing, so you decided he was just an asshole.

You needed to check with Miguel about taking Cristobal to the park, going to his office you just found Nestor standing next to an empty desk.

"Where is Miguel?"

He didnt respond.

"Where.Is.Miguel?" You ask with more attitude than you meant.

He blinked like he didnt understand.

"Nestor!" You raised your voice

"He stepped out. He'll be back in 10." His calm tone didnt match yours. You instantly felt embaressed to have been rude. Shit.

"Thanks" you walked out wishing you had been more calm

--------------------------

When you walked in he looked up, thinking it was miguel, to see you. You were wearing that new top he liked. It hugged your curves. The sun was hitting your face making you glow.

Fuck you were beautiful. He wanted to shove the chair out of the way and grab you and kiss you more than he ever wanted anything he knew he couldnt have.

Shit. You looked mad.

"Nestor!"

He gathered his thoughts

He watched you walk out. His stomach twisted that you seemed mad at him. Fuck.

----------------------

They were supposed to be gone all day so you were walking around the house, bouncing and humming a hymn to Cristobal in your pjs. He slowly fell asleep as you walked around the stairs to the den, you stopped dead.

You were met with the eyes of Miguel, Devante, Nestor, and a fair skinned man with a lot of jewlery and a shit eating grin as his eyes obviosuly roamed your body. You were just wearing a little bit too short of shorts and a tank top that cristobals sleepy hand was tugging down. You felt your stomach twist and cheeks flush.

"Sorry-I I didnt know anyone was home, he was getting fussy so.." you trailed off as Miguel stood up giving you a look you couldnt read. You looked over to Nestor and he looked upset.

"Dont worry mija we were just finishing up." Miguel said, like he meant it.

"Actually" the strange man stood, still undressing you with his eyes. It was starting to piss you off.

"Miguelito i think we should wait till my party next saturday to...finalize this deal huh?" He said with that same grin.

"Por supuesto" miguel said as he ushered the man to the other side of the room, talking to each other in spanish too quiet for you to decipher.

You felt stuck in your place. You focused on Cristobals breath against your chest. Trying to let it calm you. You noted more of the man. He looked dangerous. Emily told you Miguel was a international businessman and you believed her till you came here. You werent stupid enough to ask exactly what he did but you also werent stupid enough to believe he was just a businessman either.

The men came back and stood in front of you for a beat.

"Hey listen im really sorry i thought everyone was gone-" you started

"No worries chiquita, but do you have a passport?" Devante asked, eyebrow raised

-----------------------------

"Well if im being whored out i mine as well look good right?" You said smoothing down the soft rose gold satin dress as Emily and Dita sang your praises.

"How many times do i have to tell you (y/n) he just told Miguel he wanted to see you at the party, hes not going to do anything and we won't let him anyways." Emily reassured you, doing your hair.

"You're a part of the family now mija, this is our job as the women." You knew that comment was true, you saw it with your own eyes and that made it sting even more.

You were doing it for the sake of Emily and her family you told yourself. Plus you did look amazing in the dress.

You tugged at the zipper of the dress, it wouldn't budge.

"Hey em, can you-" you turned to see nestor at the door.

"I can if you want" his voice was gentle. Not that he was ever callous with you but it felt deliberate.

"Yeah sure" you half whispered, surprised it got caught in your throat.

He walked over. You moved your hair in front as he gently pulled the zipper up. Touching it when he was done. You turned.

"Listo?" He asked

You nodded, following. Feeling a flutter in your chest.

The drive to mexico was beautiful and serene. You mind did wander to Nestor and how sweet he was to you. You wondered if it was a fluke. Maybe he felt sorry for you. You tried not. to feel sorry for yourself.

You arrived to what looked like a castle. It had the guards with machine guns and everything. You found humor in that, as the situation sank in, you weren't scared.

It you were honest with yourself even when Nestor was cold to you, you always felt safe with him.

You all got out of the car, you last, as Nestor helped you onto the uneven stones. It'd been a minute since you wore heels.

"Dont worry." He leaned down to talk close to you, squeezing your hand. You met his smile.

The music was loud as you walked in. People were dancing and the mariachis were amazing. You were thankful to sit next to emily and dita. You felt eyes on you from men and their wives. You tugged your dress up. Definitley not the most revealing at the party but apparently it was enough.

"Its because you are not married" Dita told you, a comforting hand on your shoulder. "They are jealous" She smiled. It didnt make you feel better. You tried to focus on the drink in front of you.

The man from the house yelled joyfully and drunkenly in spanish and started walking toward the table. The men quickly stood up and met him halfway. Ushering him into a private room smoothly. Not before you made eye contact and he winked. You held your shudder.

The night went on and you found yourself almost having fun and forgetting the dangerous people around you.

You went to the bathroom as Devante and Dita danced.

You were looking for the bathroom when you felt a heavy hand on your waist. You jumped and turned. It was the man.

"Hello pretty women" he said with a accent slurred with the smell of strong alcohol that pinched your nose.

You backed up to find yourself against a wall. You started to look for a way out but his hand got harder on your waist, moving to hold your hip.

He leaned in speaking breathy spanish against your ear you couldnt understand on your best day. You took the opportunity to side step, noticing his henchmen about 10 ft away watching, glocks on their hips. The situation sank your stomach. You wouldnt be getting out of here.

"(Y/n) ive been looking everwhere for you." Dita shuffled past the man grabbing your arm and pulling you away. "Miguel needs to talk with you." She said louder than necesarry.

You were at a near jog down the hall. She stopped and turned you when you were safely away but not into the main area.

"Are you okay mija?" She held your hand. You felt tears welling.

"Men like that will ways exist and here, you will find them in abundance. It's important to stay close to us. They prey on the lone wolf okay?" You nodded. She wiped the tear you didnt know you shed.

She stayed with you till you calmed down.

"Brave face mija" she said as you walked back into the room, back to the table. Nestor and miguel were there looking directly at you, worried, trying to read your face. You forced a smile. Understanding what being in this family meant. It wasnt good. It wasnt bad. It was just your life now.

Nestor quickly sat next to you. Emily eyeing you, sympathetically. They were all too smart to not put together what happened. She touched your thigh, you flinched. She removed it. You could see she made a heartbroken face out the corner of your eyr but you couldnt bring yourself to meet her eyes.

"Im okay i promise. Just..shook up" you were honest. She nodded. You knew she felt terrible.

The night continued. Nestor wanted to kill him and he knew how he would do it. He shared looks with Miguel. He shook his head. Not yet. The second you walked out, holding ditas arm like it was the only thing keeping you up his stomach twisted. Rage ran down his back.

When he didnt see that bastard Diego and didnt see you, his mind raced and he was about to go down the hall to kill that fuck when Dita grabbed him.

"You can't. It has to be me." She didnt have to explain. He knew why. It killed him to turn around and walk away from the situation as his mind let dark thoughts in of what he was doing to you.

He kept looking at you, he could see you trying to be brave but under the table your leg was shaking and you were fidgeting with your hands.

"Come outside with me baby" he leaned over so only you could hear him.

You looked over at him standing with his hand out. You were thankful. Did he just call you baby? It sounded good coming out of his mouth.

You took his hand. It was calloused and strong. It calmed you down almost instantly as he led you outside. When people saw him coming they almost fell over themselves to move out of your way.

The cool air felt good on your flushed cheeks. He let go of your hand and led you to the balcony. You leaned on it, embracing the night air.

"Its really beautiful out here, all things considered." You chuckled.

He looked worringly at you, "Thank you Nestor." You grabbed his arm.

Fuck, his name sounded so good in your mouth.

"You're welcome." He watched as you leaned against the balcony. He wanted to touch you, tell you, youre beautiful but after what happened thats not what you needed and he knew it.

-------------------

You stayed like that for awhile, in each other's silence. The muffled sound of the mariachis relaxing you.

You felt your eyes getting heavy.

"Dont get tired now its not even 1am yet." You looked over, surprised he noticed.

"Maybe we can just stay out here all night then." You smiled at him.

Fuck he would do just about anything you asked. Crawl on glass in the snow, change your oil, anything as long as you kept smiling at him like that.

"But it's probably best to go inside right?" You sighed.

"I think so."

You grabbed his arm as you walked in, holding onto him and keeping your eyes on the table.

Time passed and you struggled to stay awake, you leaned on Nestor's shoulder without thinking, you froze. He moved over to make you more comfortable, moving his arm around you but not too much. You snuggled in. Damn he smelled good too. You closed your eyes, feeling people looking. Fuck em.

You were stirred up by Nestor rubbing your upper arm "hey, hey, time to go."

You stirred, never really falling asleep but not present for the end. Everyone was filing out slowly.

Nestor was looking over to Miguel and Diego. He shook Miguel's hand. He didn't look away as he put his coat over your shoulders and walked you all out.

You noticed Emily smirking at you, making eyes at Nestor's jacket around you.

You tried to open your mouth

"-Ah." She cut you off. "You don't need to tell me anything." She smiled.

You smiled back, happily getting in the warm car and doozing on and off on the way home, catching Nestor look at you in the rearview mirror made you blush.

You all made your way inside as you felt the emotional fatigue of the day in your legs.

Nestor was waiting by the front door. Not for you it seemed. Just taking a moment.

"Can i be out here with you for awhile?" You asked, ready for him to say anything.

"Yeah."

"Thanks for tonight, for taking care of me."

"I know you can take care of yourself (y/n). I just didn't want you to feel alone out there." He spoke softly, sitting next to you.

You stared at his face for the first time it seemed. He was beautiful. You dared to glance down at his lips.

He followed your eyes. He wouldn't move qn inch on you tonight. He didnt want to chance pushing you but fuck did he want you so bad.

You weren't used to initiating, you could see he wanted you but wouldnt move. You closed the distance, stopping just short to see if he'd react.

His head just barely titled up towards you, you took it and kissed him, you being the one to take control felt good. You wondered if he was usually like this.

He was gentle and sweet and you found yourself appreciating it tonight. You grabbed his face and you deepened the kiss.

You felt brave and stood up and sat down to straddle him. He grunted in the back of his throat as you grabbed his braid he moved his hands to hold your thigh and ass.

The kiss slowed down and he smiled into it. You laughed, dropping your head into his shoulder, touching your lips.

"Wow uh-" you got off him, laughing with him.

"Yeah" he laughed, grabbing your hand. "Let's go inside."

He dropped you off at your room which felt cute and a little ridiculous. It was fitting.

Words failed you and it seemed to him, as well.

"Goodnight." He said softly again.

"Good night Nestor." You replied closing your door, silently congratulating yourself for not dragging him into your room.

Whatever, give it a week. You smiled.

[anti-pasto]

for the 200 ask thingy, i actually dare you to do all of them. :D

delgaskarthalexhere we go, anon: 

200: My crush’s name is: I don’t have one right now, I don’t get them often (if I ever had a crush at all)

199: I was born in: 2003

198: I am really: A 2005 emo kid x a 2008 scene kid x a 2014 tumblr fangirl x Kyle himself

 197: My cellphone company is: Apple

194: My ring size is: Honestly? No idea. Propose to me with a sword.

 193: My height is: Somewhere between 5′7″ and 5′8″

192: I am allergic to: Nothing I’m aware of 

191: My 1st car was:  94 Station Wagon, by request

190: My 1st job was: being this funny is a full-time gig

 189: Last book you read: Bone Gap by Laura Ruby

188: My bed is: “made”

187: My pet: I have a cat, I love her very much and I will show her to you if you dm me a cursed image

186: My best friend: We don’t use “best friend” for personal reasons, but they’ve been with me since I was 5 so, my one and only Bro

185: My favorite shampoo is: anything with “silky smooth” or “strawberries” on the bottle. i’m not that picky anymore.

184: Xbox or ps3: xbox or ps4  xbox

183: Piggy banks are: really useful

 182: In my pockets: wallet, keys, phone, earbuds, black pen/pencil, earplugs, mini flashlight

 181: On my calendar:  i’m meeting a friend for smoothies tomorrow

 180: Marriage is: something we shouldn’t push so much onto people. it’s a declaration of love, not an end-all fix-all to your life. i can’t ever see myself getting married but who knows!

 179: Spongebob can: continue to be a relevant meme

178: My mom: i mean. we function. i can’t really complain about my family at large but i am defiantly looking forward to living literally as far away from them as i can. 

 177: The last three songs I bought were? psh, you think i pay for music? (folie a deux, lake effect kid, believers never die volume two) (those are albums but its okay)

176: Last YouTube video watched: I watched Markiplier play Uno

175: How many cousins do you have? 11? 12? I lost count

174: Do you have any siblings? I have a brother

 173: Are your parents divorced? Nope!

172: Are you taller than your mom? Yes, I have been for a while

171: Do you play an instrument? dude HECK yeah! i vibe on piano, guitar, ukulele, clarinet, and im a drum major

170: What did you do yesterday? I went on a drive by myself.

 [ I Believe In ] 

169: Love at first sight: Nope.

168: Luck: Yes, but luck is something that can be engineered

167: Fate: To an extent

 166: Yourself: I’d say overall, yeah. I still have doubts tho

165: Aliens: Mmmmmm yeah

 164: Heaven: Yes

163: Hell: Yes

162: God: Yeup

 161: Horoscopes: without an ounce of truth, they would have died a long time ago

160: Soul mates: the greeks had seven words for love. i think we have multiple soul mates to fit each of those categories. there are definitely people we’re just meant to vibe with

159: Ghosts: i want to say yes but i really dont know

158: Gay Marriage: yes. its 2020. grow up.

157: War: in theory? no. war is kinda messed up. in reality? not everyone is going to be down to nice diplomatic conflict resolution, and not everyone is just gonna leave people *countries* they don’t like alone, so...

156: Orbs: ??? energies are real

155: Magic: vibes are real

 [ This or That ]

 154: Hugs or Kisses: hugs

153: Drunk or High: i am a child of jesus

152: Phone or Online: online

 151: Red heads or Black haired:  irdc but black hair bc i am Emo

150: Blondes or Brunettes: blonde?? ig?? easier to dye

149: Hot or cold: hot weather + cold rooms

148: Summer or winter: summer

147: Autumn or Spring: autum (screw spring)

 146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla

145: Night or Day: night

 144: Oranges or Apples: oranges (better to share with homies)

 143: Curly or Straight hair: i dont care but curly

 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonald give iced coffee

141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: dark chocolate

 140: Mac or PC: pc for vidgya gaemes

139: Flip flops or high heals: ...converse. please. i cant walk properly in either of those

 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: sweet and poor 

 137: Coke or Pepsi: pepsi

136: Hillary or Obama: this is kinda outdated but obama

135: Burried or cremated: cremated i aint watch spn for nothin

134: Singing or Dancing: singing. at least that gets better with practice

133: Coach or Chanel: chanel (thank u mr frank ocean and also the neighborhood)

 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: whomst

 131: Small town or Big city: big city and if you say small town you’ve never lived in a small town

 130: Wal-Mart or Target: target

 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: who tf is this

 128: Manicure or Pedicure: idk dude probably pedicure i don’t like people touching my hands and i use them for too much to get my nails done

127: East Coast or West Coast: hnngggggggg west coast has more to do but east coast has better beaches and 

126: Your Birthday or Christmas: birthday 

125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate bc then i can give u some

124: Disney or Six Flags: ive only been to disney so disney (though i AM a HARDCORE rollercoaster stan so it wouldnt take much for me to say six flags)

123: Yankees or Red Sox: what 

 [ Here’s What I Think About ]

 122: War: unfortunately sometimes necessary but not as a first resort i went over this already 

 121: George Bush: is that the shoe guy?

 120: Gay Marriage:  be gay. do crime. kiss wife. or husband. or partner. basically, hell yeah

119: The presidential election: america need 2 b single and focus on herself

 118: Abortion: pro-choice and that choice should be made by the one carrying the baby

117: MySpace: tumblr’s dad

116: Reality TV: don’t talk to about abt this

 115: Parents: disgusting. go to therapy. 

114: Back stabbers: if you’re gonna stab me in the back, pull my lungs through my ribcage bc that’s what my ancestor’s ghosts are gonna do to you (thanks great (x a few times) grandma viking ily thanks for the hair:) )

113: Ebay: good for merch and selling books

 112: Facebook: zuck my dick, data-theif

111: Work: i like doing work? like- i enjoy completing tasks and seeing my hard work pay off? it’s not that bad?

110: My Neighbors: old. boring. want me to babysit for free.

109: Gas Prices: i cant really complain rn they’re kinda low and im a little broke so

108: Designer Clothes: i vibe to them, honestly

 107: College: not for everyone but definitely for me

106: Sports: marching band is a sport marching band is a sport marching band is a sport marching band is a sport marching band is a sport but only technically speaking though you can make fair comparisons to sports such as cheer, and gymnastics where the idea is to put on a show and receive a score in the form of competition. 

 105: My family: disgusting

104: The future: the future doesn’t exist

 [ Last time I ] 

103: Hugged someone: god, don’t ask me this

 102: Last time you ate: uhhh like 9 hours ago? it was dinner and i had pizza

 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: three or four weeks ago by best bro came to visit and we vibed

100: Cried in front of someone: i finished twist and shout at school at the end of a very bad week. it was only a few tears but that’s as close as i get to crying

99: Went to a movie theater: whenever the last star wars movie came out

98: Took a vacation: last year i went to dc over summer break to see the Smithsonian, it was a lot of fun. i was supposed to go to altanta and florida this year but that didn’t happen for reasons

 97: Swam in a pool: last week

 96: Changed a diaper: never

 95: Got my nails done: never

 94: Went to a wedding: its been at least 6 years dude

93: Broke a bone: never, somehow

 92: Got a peircing: nope

91: Broke the law: technically, yesterday. 55 is too slow

90: Texted: just now

 [ MISC ] 

89: Who makes you laugh the most: the person in my snap named “junior”

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my cat

87: The last movie I saw: probably into the spiderverse

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: things going back to normal. or somewhat normal. i need school to have a schedule bc i absolutely cannot force myself to function without outside influence

 85: The thing im not looking forward to: ironically, school in the fall. the way we’re going back is going to wreck me more than lockdown already has

 84: People call me: i only ft one of my bros and they know who tf they are if you ask to ft you’re getting fuckin blocked mate i dont do that shit video calls are for WORK and SCHOOL thats IT. but ppl call me by my nickname irl, i go by screech on here. 

83: The most difficult thing to do is: listen to my parent’s political opinions? live in a small town? force myself to be productive without a physical influence and reminder? put up with that one dude?

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: nope

 81: My zodiac sign is: scoprio/leo/gemini

80: The first person i talked to today was: the potential bassist for our potential band? 

79: First time you had a crush: uhh im still not sure if it was a crush but i wanted them to myself and they wanted (and got) someone better. we were just friends so it doesn’t really matter

 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: the person on snap named “the great oracle”

77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: yesterday, it was my brother

 76: Right now I am talking to: in order of snap names, “vibin ~[^.^]~”, “russian umbrella”, and “mom” (not really)

75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully, a job that makes me happy

74: I have/will get a job: as soon as i know what’s going on with school. but like as an adult? wherever will hire me and pay my fairly. being a barista would be fun, but at a local place (not in my current town)

73: Tomorrow: ???? time for bad poetry: tomorrow i will see my friend/ admist this lasting chaos/ we will be each other’s solitude/ while sharing fruity drinks/ and when we both come home/ a smile we will bring

72: Today: idk what this means so more poetry: today i will be sleep deprived as always/ i will think of them and weep/ but no tears will fall from my eyes/ for i know there is a reason/ we went our own way

 71: Next Summer: i fr dont know whats goin on so: next summer i will be/ as happy as can be/ because i will be in pain no longer/ the earth is sure to heal/ and i will heal with her/ so i can enjoy/ the heatwave of next summer

70: Next Weekend: next weekend i will spend/ my days wasting away/ maybe ill finish hannibal/ again/ not that serial killers make the dopamine stay/ i will not see my friends/ or talk to my family/ i will seldom eat/ and live off coffee/ this has been my life/ all quarintine/ god someone please help me

 69: I have these pets: i have four cats, three chickens, and a dog

 68: The worst sound in the world: my dad and grandpa talking

 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: Them

 66: People that make you happy: snap name time: the great oracle, junior, vibin ~[^.^]~, russian umbrella, mom, hero, booby-king 48, go to bed, son, pooper trooper, mac&cheese, plain egg biscuit, apple pie

 65: Last time I cried: i dont cry bitch (last week over officals that cant make up they gottdamned mindes)

64: My friends are: my family and i would die for each and all of them

 63: My computer is: an old hp but it play gaemes real good so it okie

 62: My School: is trash but the band pops off

61: My Car: old, fast, clean

60: I lose all respect for people who: are my dad

 59: The movie I cried at was: i cried over big hero six

 58: Your hair color is: blonde

57: TV shows you watch: supernatural, good omens, hannibal, parks and rec

56: Favorite web site: this hellsite or youtube

 55: Your dream vacation: out of the country with beautiful beaches, amazing food, and my best friend

54: The worst pain I was ever in was: the time i split the back of my head open, the time i split my chin open, and the time my then best friend said they didn’t want to talk to me anymore. i’ll let you guess which one hurt the most and which one i think about every fucking day

53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium or medium well. 

52: My room is: clean and a reflection of myself, or so i’ve been told

51: My favorite celebrity is: i do not engage in celebrity worship. ill follow them and reblog gifs/interviews but i dont really have a favorite. the less i know abt them the better.

 50: Where would you like to be: my own apartment in nyc

49: Do you want children: FUCK THEM KIDS BRO

 48: Ever been in love: i dont know if it was love. i dont know if it was a crush. what i do know id that i was attached and they didn’t feel the same, and why would they?

 47: Who’s your best friend: we dont really use best friend bc but “the great oracle” “junior” and “vibin ~[^.^]~”

46: More guy friends or girl friends: its 50/50

45: One thing that makes you feel great is: goin fast, the beach, playin video games

44: One person that you wish you could see right now: them

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: go to college, earn degree

 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: commit arson

 41: Have you pre-named your children: FUCK. THEM. KIDS. BRO.

40: Last person I got mad at: they do not understand that they do not know everything about something they’re not even involved in yet

39: I would like to move to: new zealand

38: I wish I was a professional: artist? musican? youtuber? who knows

 [ My Favorites ] 

37: Candy: nerds

36: Vehicle: 1970 mustang gt

 35: President: jfk only bc his assassination is the only good thing abt american history the rest of it is fucked up and shouldn’t have happened. also jfk’s song in assassians the musical goes hard

34: State visited: california

 33: Cellphone provider: verizon? apple? idfk

32: Athlete: what is sport

31: Actor: i don't watch shows or movies

30: Actress: i do not consume media

29: Singer: alex gaskarth or alexander deleon

 28: Band: fall out boy 

 27: Clothing store: hot topic (i will not apologize)

 26: Grocery store: okay harris teeter fucks but lidil’s has aloe vera juice and target at 9 pm energy so idk man 

25: TV show: supernatural...

24: Movie: big hero 6

 23: Website: tumblr or youtube

 22: Animal: snow leopard 

 21: Theme park: busch gardens bc roller coaster go fast

20: Holiday: christmas

19: Sport to watch: snowboarding bc its like skateboarding but on snow

18: Sport to play: anything with havy footwork (marching band is a sport)

17: Magazine: i do not condume media

16: Book: the ranger’s apprentice series as a whole makes up my all-time one favorite book

 15: Day of the week: friday bc its game day baybey

14: Beach: cocoa beach in florida but also i have so much left to experience 

13: Concert attended: i havent been to any notable gigs but i was supposed to go to hella mega

 12: Thing to cook: pancakes

11: Food: pizza or shushi

 10: Restaurant: chiplote

 9: Radio station: i like my local rock station and my local edm/top 40 station

8: Yankee candle scent: anything smoky or vanilla idc

7: Perfume: chanel no. 5 if i even wear it

6: Flower: Hydrangea

5: Color: orange

 4: Talk show host: cecil palmer

 3: Comedian: john maulaney

 2: Dog breed: yes

1: Did you answer all these truthfully? ;)

That was a trip. But it was fun, please do things like this more often. Also, I don’t consume media by choice. I’m not sheltered I just can’t be bothered, and I have enough going on. That being said I will now be sleeping. Thanks again, Anon, I hope you have fun reading this :D

[scullyeffect]

i love reading your posts about being a nanny, its something i like the idea of but i dont think id ever be able to do it

it definitely takes a certain type of person i think, but you can also learn with experience. i have friends who suddenly become very ~aware of themselves~ when talking with a kid. like making sarcastic jokes or something and it’s like um...be yourself?? nobody likes being talked to in a patronising tone, or spoken to like a well behaved dog. but seriously, just be yourself. they already think you’re cool af for not being mom lol. and most kids don’t judge. the amount of times i’ve been self conscious about my appearance at work? zero. the amount of times i’ve been scared my boss will catch me on my phone? zero. the amount of times i’ve plucked a wedgie with confidence? every day. i’d been babysitting kids for like 8 years (including one 5 y/o girl who got dropped off at my house at 8 every morning and was picked up at 6pm five days a week for the entire summer when i was 16...wow) before i became an au pair, but i know people who wing it and are completely fine.

i think the real key to it being a job you can enjoy or be “good” at is patience. because at the end of the day you’re not the parent. it’s not fully up to you to discipline the kids. you get to go home at the end of the day. sometimes you have to bring problems up with the parents to deal with because you’re unsure about their protocol (the kids i take care of aren’t allowed to watch tv or use electronics, so when i showed them a trailer for a movie 6 was like ooooh i’m gonna tell mom!! and i was like fuck). one time 6 peed during a 5 floor elevator ride and i had to reassure her that it was okay, then spend ten minutes wiping up the mess with paper towels hoping to hell no one would need the elevator. luckily that sent her right into the shower so there was no war. like i could have lost my temper and been like WHY DIDN”T YOU JUST HOLD IT. YOU CLEAN IT UP. because she had been holding it for like 30 minutes and she’s 6. i learned from this and whenever one of them says they need to go i’m like WHO WANTS A PASTRY REAL QUICK LET’S GO SPEND 5 EUROS TO PEE.

but at the same time you end up being a really important factor in a child’s life. sometimes they’ll ask you questions they feel like they can’t ask their parents: the 15 y/o teenager i lived with for two years came into my room in tears saying she couldn’t figure out how to use a tampon and she didn’t want to ask her mom, the 9 year old got “the talk” from her mom but admitted to me that she didn’t understand and could she ask me some questions. you’re the one (in my case), who’s making sure they’re clean and have eaten and brushed their teeth before the parents come home. you’re the one helping with homework (and it’s really amazing to be able to be the one teaching a kid how to read at home. i’ve gotten to do this twice and it’s so exciting when they start wanting to read some of their bedtime story instead of letting you do it). at the end of the day it’s a really humbling job.

but patience and understanding is really key, also confidence. sometimes babysitters are the good guy, and you can get away with anything because mom and dad are out for the night. i think that’s normal and fun. but when you’re with the kids every day you don’t get to just be the good guy, or they won’t learn anything. and that’s hard!! because again, you don’t have the full parental authority. 

the absolute ABSOLUTE most important thing, which can either be the easiest or most difficult, is getting a solid routine going. especially with younger kids, but it’s good for all ages. once you have the routine set up you’re good for life. obviously sometimes you’ve gotta roll with a doctor’s appointment, or in my case the occasional public transport strike (”who wants to walk a mile today ladies!!!”) it’s especially nice when the kids unconsciously pick up on it and will sometimes prompt you like “how much time do we have to play until bath time?”, or “today is wednesday, so we’re going to the park, but can we go to this one instead of that one?”. so like with the kids i take of now the afternoon routine (except wednesday, which is different) is:

4:30pm: pick up from school, snack while we’re taking the metro back (bc otherwise they get antsy, they haven’t eaten since 11:30)

5:00-5:30pm: homework

5:30-6:30pm: play/read

6:30-7:00pm: one of them takes a bath/shower while i make dinner, the other one sets the table and helps with dinner, or she can read/play

7:00-whenever dinner is finished (normally 7:45pm)

7:45-8ish: second one takes a bath/shower while the other helps clear the table, then she can read/play, after that they both brush their teeth

8:00-9:00 the older one reads while i read to the younger one, or they’ll both listen to me read

also keep in mind this is france where eating late is normal, bedtime is probably later than the US (when i think about putting kids to bed at 7:30 in the US i feel like it’s the afternoon)

idk if you remember, but in september when i started taking care of 6 and 9 i was absolutely miserable. their parents had separated literally weeks before i arrived so the emotional dynamic was chaotic as hell, both apartments were in boxes, they were sleeping over at their grandparents’ house most nights, and here was this new girl they were supposed to trust. i met the girls for about 10 minutes in june when i had an interview, but the next time i saw them was the first day i picked them up from school. they still stress me out way more than the girls i lived with for two years (who were older, but overall just more well behaved), but i love them a lot. for the first two months i seriously thought i’d quit. i was so stressed out every day and felt like i was getting no support from the parents when i brought up problems i was having with their kids. now i really love them and i think they dig me too. 

so i think if you want to do it maybe try to get more experience babysitting and trying to get a steady babysitting job! i remember i would babysit the same toddler pretty often and i always had a loose routine with her so that when i came over she knew what to expect and i didn’t feel so harried at age 17. if you’re looking to be an au pair though, especially in a foreign country, you’ve gotta be picky as hell. i learned that from experience. if you don’t think you can handle a baby but you want to live in paris, you’ve gotta put your job before the location. if you do better taking care of boys (i do way better with girls. they’re so awful to each other if they have a sister, but the chaotic physical energy boys seem to have does not agree with me. they’re like dogs i’m like “time to play frisbee i need to wear you out”) look for a family with boys unless you think you can adapt. if you’re fine with both, go for it. if you want to learn/improve a foreign language, try to find a family that’s cool with you speaking their native language. people looking for anglophone nannies often have a 100% english policy. when i plugged in all my search criteria in 2016 i think i found five families total who fit the specifications. and then in addition to that i skyped all of them so i could try and sense if a Vibe was there. 

i’m sorry this is so long but i don’t have any au pair friends who kind of like...were there for the job as well as the city...so i never got to gab childcare. ask me all the questions.

[renjingujifortheladies]

“dont fuckin run in the bar or you gonna bash your head in!” Take’s voice boomed in the doorway since the tables and chairs were pushed together and the place was emptier like that. his twins didnt heed his warning and run ahead, slamming right into the corner of a table. however there was no loud wailing because they knew if they cried they would get into timeout. they rubbed each others head and went on to play in a slower pace. Take’s parenting methods lacked in a lot of ways but it was still better than leaving them with their mom.

he walked ahead popping into the office giving Ryo his little booklet to fill in for work renewal and already taking his coat and watch off going out into the bar starting to scrub away. “fuckin mirror is dirty as shit, Ryssan you got a lousy ass helper here...” he grumbled to the older man who just smiled at Takeshi’s cursing and gently ushered the kids upstairs to watch tv and give them some fruit for snacks and do his end of the bargain and babysit them while Take forcibly took over the bar again.

he pulled in a chair got on top of it and started taking the top shelf off. he was on the middle of the third shelf scrubbing away and sloshing dirty water that blackened from the cigarette smoke that stuck to the mirrors surface when the front door opened and blond guy came in. 

“we aint open yet Dipshit!” he barked at the intruder followed by a larger guy stuck to him like a tick to a dogs neck. “if you are the bartender you better get your shit together , this place is a fucking mess! when did you clean these mirrors last you lazy asshole? the fuckin counter sticks. and if thats the time you are coming for work then you are fucking late my friend who the hell do you think you are waltzing in here like you are the Madame of the house... go and get changed and while you are at it change this dirty water. if you slosh it into Ryssans garden ill knock your teeth in. i can see it in your eye thats where your lousy ass headed... into the toilet , rinse the bucket and bring lukewarm water. and move your ass. and your idle friend over there can arrange the tables and chairs. you look the type you wont piss yourself  with a bit of manual labor and you definitely look like you had nothing to eat today. I lost my appetite seeing what came  to this bar, so do that for me and ill heat up my dinner for you. hope ya like  cooked buttery potato and  Beef Bourguignon, “ Take gave a lopsided smile to Arinaga who was sizing him up. 

he fished the thermos from his bag and arranged the food nuking it in the microwave stinking up the bar with the home cooked meals smell. 

 @vsheart​

[fatrainbowmermaidunicorn]

Nothing New (Jimin x You ft. Park Jihyun)

MASTERLIST

A/N: this is the result of what happens after spending the whole night googling and staring at Jimin’s and Jihyun’s beautiful faces. how can a pair of brothers be so good looking? hahaha. 

Summary : Falling for your brother’s best friend is nothing new. So its nothing when Jimin falls for Jihyun’s bestfriend right? Especially when the said friend has a huge crush on Jihyun himself?

“Wow, not bad!” Jimin exclaimed as he pushed his sunglasses up to his head from obstructing the view of his little brother’s new apartment. Jihyun just moved to Seoul to continue his studies, and Jimin and his parents are currently looking around his new apartment, making sure he has eveything he needs. His parents are busy combing through every inch of the place, making sure that their son will live comfortably.

“Mom, dont worry so much. I’m already an adult! And Jimin-hyung is just nearby!” Jihyun sighed at his mother constant worry.

“Your brother wont always be able to take care of you Jihyun. What are you going to do when he’s on tour or something?” Jihyun rolled his eyes.

“Oh my god. I know how to take care of myself mom! I dont need Jimin-hyung to babysit me!” Jimin chuckled, understanding both his mother’s and Jihyun’s distressed. His little brother is the family’s baby, of course his parents is going to make a fuss about him moving so far away from home. And Jihyun is finally an adult, so he must be craving for some sort of freedom, and moving away from the family gives him exactly that. “And to make you feel better, shall I remind you that Y/N is my roommate?”

Their mother nodded in an obvious relief after remembering the fact. “Yes, you are right. I forgot you are living with Y/N. At least I can count on her to make sure you eat and at least take a bath once a day,” Jihyun rolled his eyes again.

“We are the same age! How can you trust her more that you trust me?!”

“Wait, Y/N is going to live with you? Your puny bestfriend who has the biggest crush on you?” Jimin raised both of his hands, halting the conversation between Jihyun and his mother. This is news to him. His baby brother is all grown up and having a girl as a roommate.

“She’s not puny hyung! And she does not have a crush on me! We are just best friends!” Jihyun denied whole heartedly.

“Oh honey. She obviously has the biggest crush on you. But I don’t blame her one bit. My son is so handsome, it will be weird if she didnt like you,” his mother went over and pinched his cheeks.

“Oh god, please dont say things like this when she arrived please,” Jihyun groaned. “I dont want to scare her off,” Jimin laughs. Jihyun and Y/N has been bestfriends since they were little, running around and playing in the mud together. Y/N was a timid little girl, shy and awkward, with a slim tiny body that makes Jimin always perceived her as a weak small child who followed his brother around like a puppy. It is also a well known fact that she has the biggest crush on Jihyun, although his brother doesnt seem to recriprocate the feelings, but they are still the best of friends. The doorbell rings, snapping Jimin out from his thoughts.

“Hyung, can you get that? Its probably Y/N. We need to move this couch over there,” Jihyun motioned to the new couch they just bought. Jimin nodded and went to open the door, only to be greeted with a girl who doesnt resemble the puny girl he had imagined, but instead a full grown woman, smiling brightly at him.

“Oppa?”

“Erm… I think you have the wrong house. This is Park Jihyun’s apartment,” Jimin stammered, still mesmerized by the girl’s beauty and eye blinding smile.

“Oppa! Jimin oppa! It is you! I can recognized your face anywhere. You look a lot like Jihyun oppa, how can I ever not recognize you?” The girl laughs. Jimin was surprised. Who is this girl and why does she know both him and his brother? Jimin took another look at her face and he starts to see something familiar in her eyes.

“Wait… Y/N?”

“Duhh. Of course its me oppa! Who else could it be? Dont think just because you have become a hot shot idol and didnt visit me for the last four years that I would let you slide for not recognizing me!” She squeals while rolling her eyes and jumped in to give Jimin a tight hug, just like she usually did when she used to see him when she was younger.

But everything about this hug felt different. Jimin didnt feel like he’s hugging Jihyun’s puny bestfriend. In fact, he is hyperly aware that he is hugging a beautifully grown woman, and as Jimin smell and feel her scent, the smell of her hair and the curves of her body, he knows he’s fucked.

/////

Ever since moving day, Jimin spend a lot of time visiting Jihyun’s apartment, using “checking out what’s his beloved brother is up to” as a definite reason. He will just sometimes randomly showed up, sometimes with takeout food, sometimes with a movie, sometimes with an invitation to treat the two of them to dinner or lunch.  If he’s lucky, Y/N, the person he wanted to actually see will be there, and on even more luckier days, only Y/N will be there while Jihyun is out doinf errnads or attending classes and having something needs to do, dressed in an oversized shirt and messy hair in a bun, which had become Jimin’s favorite look on her.

Jimin thought his infatuation on his brother’s best friend will pass. He meets beautiful girls all the time when he works, why is Y/N any different right? Just another pretty face, that is nothing new to him. But she is not. He knows she’s not, and as he spends more and more time with her, Jimin starts to fall harder. He starts to fall for her laugh, her sense of humour, her views in life, her sarcasm, everything about her.

Jimin wonders how this could happen to him. How did this little girl grow up and turned into everything he wants in a girl? And why does his dream girl has to have a huge crush on his own brother?

“I think I’m in love,” Jimin suddenly declared as him, Taehyung and Yoongi are lazing around watching TV.

“Oh fuck, do I have to be here for this? Can I just go?” A sleepy Yoongi immediately gets up from his sleeping form. Jimin glared at him. Taehyung shifted himself to sit beside Jimin and looked at his hyung who is sleepily hugging a pillow.

“I’ll take care of this. You can go continue sleeping in your room hyung,” with Taehyung’s confirmation, Yoongi immediately gets up and hastily went to his room.

“Seriously. That hyung! How can sleep be more important than my feelings right now?” Jimin grumbled, making Taehyung laughs.

“Dont worry about him. Now tell me what is this about? I didnt even know you are meeting a girl Chim. How can you not tell me?” Taehyung pouts.

“I did tell you about her Tae. Its Jihyun’s roommate, the one I always told you about,” Jimin said quietly, feeling weird to admit out loud about his feelings towards Y/N. Taehyung’s eyes widen as he remembered who Jimin is talking about.

“Wait. You think you are in love with Jihyun’s best friend? The one you called puny and awkward?” Taehyung exclaimed. Jimin scooted lower in the couch.

“She’s not puny anymore Tae! Nor is she awkward. She has turned into this… this… beautiful woman,” Jimin passed him his phone to show a picture of Y/N that they took together recently. Taehyung’s eyes widen again at the picture.

“Woahhh,”

“Who’s the hot chick?” Jungkook who passes by peeked at the phone in Taehyung’s hand. Jimin immediately snatched his phone back. Its bad enough he has to fight for Y/N’s attention from his own brother, he’s not going to win if the muscle pig maknae joins the race.

“Nobody,” Jimin grumbled. Taehyung laughs at his friend’s reaction.

“Its Chim’s new love interest Kook. Dont even think about it,” Taehyung warns him with a playful smile.

“Jimin-hyung sure knows how to pick them. She’s really hot,” Jungkook gave one last statement before walking away, leaving the two of them alone again to continue thier dicussion.

“She’s gorgeous Chim. Now I know what you mean,”

“The problem is, its not just her looks that I like. I like her Tae. Everything about her. She just… gets me, you know?” Jimin sighed as Taehyung nodded silently.

“Have you tried telling her how you feel?”

Jimin shake his head. “No. How can I? She likes Jihyun remember? And isnt it weird for someone you have always think as a big brother suddenly confessed to being in love with you?” Jimin groaned in frustration at the fact. He really dont know what to do. He wants Y/N so bad but she is so out of reached. He doesnt want to scare her off either.

“There’s no harm in trying. You did told me that Jihyun doesnt seem to like her in that way right? On the bright side, you know she must finds you atleast a little attractive at the rate she keeps saying how good looking Jihyun is. You and your brother has the same look Chim!” Taehyung grins, making Jimin smile too. That is true. People has always said that Jihyun looks a lot like him. So if Y/N finds Jihyun to be handsone, she must thinks Jimin is handsome too. “So just go for it Chim. You got nothing to lose, but a lot to gain. What’s the worse that could have happen anyway?”

Jimin nodded and but wonders if he will ever find the balls to do what Taehyung suggested.

/////

Jimin lets himself enters the apartment when no one answered after he knocked a hundred times and found that the door is unlocked. He is greeted with the sight of Y/N vaccuming the living room while dancing, or atleast tried to, and singing loudly to Twice which is playing on the TV.

No wonder they cant hear me knocking. Still,  its absolutely dangerous to leave the door unlock like that!

Jimin take purchased and stand by the back wall, silently watching Y/N who still didnt realized his presence. Jimin felt his heart beats faster as he watched Y/N trying to follow Twice’s dance, looking adorable as hell as she shakes her body, trying her best but fail miserably to follow the group’s cute moves. Jimin always thought girl groups are cute when they danced, but when Y/N does it, its cuteness on a whole other level. Cuteness that just seems to do things to him. Y/N finally deemed the living room to be cleaned enough and turn off the vaccum and as she turned around, she almost had a heart attack seeing Jimin standing there, grinning at her.

“Oppa! When did you arrived? You scared me!” Jimin chuckled.

“Serves you right for not locking the door. Its dangerous! You two are careless!” He scolded her as he walks her way.

“Sorry oppa. We must accidentally forgot,” she smile sheepishly. “That is what big brothers are for right? To remind us of this things,” Jimin felt his heart ache as she calls him big brother. Is that all she will ever see him as? Jimin doesnt want to be her big brother. He wants to be more than that.

“Jihyun is taking a shower. Come and sit with me oppa while you wait for him,” Y/N patted the seat on the couch besides her, which Jimin happily obliged. The two of them continue watching the girl groups perform on the TV screen, well Y/N is. Jimin is just busy controlling his emotions and racing heart for sitting so close to her when Y/N suddenly turned to face him.

“Hey oppa?”

“Yes?”

“I always wonder. The girls are all so beautiful, cute, talented. Why didnt you or any of your members date any of them before?” Y/N’s question took Jimin by surprised. What is he supposed to say? That its because they are nothing like Y/N?  That he was never as attracted to those girls as he is with her? Sure, he finds them cute and he enjoys their performance, but a pretty face is nothing new for someone like Jimin. What’s new is how this particular girl that is currently besides him is able to make his heart beats faster just by smiling at him.

“Oh my god,” Y/N exclaimed when Jimin took too long to answer, turning her body to face him with a very excited face. “You did date them didnt you? But you cant tell anybody because you are afraid your fans will not like it? Is that it? Oppa, you can tell me! Please tell me!” Y/N grabbed his hand to shake it in her excitement at the thoughts of Jimin actually dating another idol, but the only thing Jimin can focused on is the goosebump and chills where Y/N’s skin touched his.

God Jimin, you really need to control yourself.

Jimin immediately shake his head at her accusation. “No! I never dated any of them Y/N! And nor do I want to,” He denied whole heartedly. Jimin really hates talking about other girls with Y/N. Why should he talk about things he have no interest it when he rather talk about her and how perfect she is for him instead? Cant she just realized that its her who Jimin really wanted?

“But why not? I know you like Red Velvet. I have seen you said it on some shows,” Y/N insisted, cocking her head to the side, questioning him. Parts of Jimin felt uneasy that Y/N has knowledge of his admittance for admiring the Red Velvet girls but another part of him is happy that Y/N actually watches his show. It only makes him feel like he should work harder from now on, just to make her proud of him. “It cant be because none of them are interested in you oppa. I mean, look at you oppa, you are so good looking and extremely talented. If they dont have a crush on you then they are surely blind!”

Jimin felt himself start to smile at the statement. So Y/N thinks he is good looking and talented. That thought alone is enough to make him stayed up and dwell about her possible feelings for him even further tonight. He cant help but feel a swell of pride and happiness in his chest.

“Those girls are not my type,” Jimin answered, short and direct, hoping it will make Y/N srop talking about this issue further. But what he really wanted to say is;  you are. You are my type Y/N. You are what my heart truly desires.

“Not your type? Beautiful and talented is not your type?” Y/N raised an eyebrow. “What is your type then oppa? Ugly and talentless?” She chuckles. “If that’s your type, then you should just date me!” Y/N laughs harder at her own joke, finding it particularly funny that her best friend’s brother, an extremely good looking idol would date her.But Jimin doesnt see it as a joke at all. He felt angry that Y/N called herself ugly and talentless, but he also feel his heart race faster at the thought of him dating Y/N. He starts to imagine what it would be like if he can hold her hand and kiss her whenever he wants to. Where he can spend all night listening to her talk and laugh. Where can tell everyone that she belongs to him and proudly show her off to the world. Jimin would give anything to be that someone for her.

“Y/N-”

“Oh hey hyung, when did you arrived?” Jimin was cut off and the two of them turned around to see Jihyun who is finally finished with his bath, only clad in a towel which is wrapped to cover the lower half of his body, droplets of water trickled down from his hair which is still wet from his recent shower to his tone chest and defined abs that is proudly showcased to their eyes. Jimin glanced at Y/N who is still by his side and watches how she is clearly staring at his little brother with her mouth gaping open, eyes wide and trying to control her breathing, admiring his brother’s well muscled body. Jimin sighed, jealousy and frustration starts to consumed his body as he tries hard not to cupped her face and turned her to look at him instead.

At this rate, will he ever be able to win Y/N’s love from his own brother?

/////

“Hey, happy birthday Y/N,” Jimin peeks his head through the crack of the opened sliding door that separates the currently full apartment with the breezy corridor. “I have been looking everywhere for you. Why are you hiding out here when its your own birthday?” He smile and took a seat besides her.

“Thanks for coming oppa. I didnt think you would come to a party that is filled with teenagers that can recognized you in a heartbeat,”

“Well, they already know I’m Jihyun’s brother anyway. That’s hardly a secret,” Jimin chuckles. “And I have this, idols’ secret weapon,” he took out a crumpled black face mask and grinned, making Y/N laugh. God, Jimin can listen to that laugh all day long.

“Wow, didnt know that’s the only thing you need to successfully hide yourself,”

“Think of it as our main disguise. Superman has his glasses, Batman took has his mask. And we idols cover our faces with this,” he laughs again. “And everybody is mostly drunk anyway, or at least half way there. I dont think they would remember me,”

“Oh? How about you then oppa? Why arent you drunk yet? This is a party you know,” Y/N smile.

“I dont drink at parties. I always try my best to keep sober. An… incident occured while me and my members went out drinking one day, so we decide to keep it to only a two drink maximum since then” Jimin explained as he cringed at the memory of that night.

“Okay, now this is something I would like to know in detail!”

“Not today Y/N. Its a Bangtan most confidential secret,” Jimin chuckled. “But really, what are you doing out here alone? You should be inside with your friends,”

Y/N sighed as she downed the rest of her drink and pour herself another shot from the bottle she had kept beside her chair. “I… dont feel like it,”

“Want to tell me about it?” Jimin asks softly as he detects the sadness in her voice. Y/N finally shrugged and answer after contemplating for a while.

“Oppa probably already know about it anyway. So whats the harm in telling you right?” Y/N closes her eyes and let the night breeze hit her face before she opens them again. “Jihyun introduces me to his girlfriend today. And then I saw them making out in the corner,”

“Y/N…”

“Its okay oppa,” Y/N try to laugh but it sounds so forced to Jimin. “I mean, we were never together anyway. And Jihyun has never lead me on although he knows perfectly well about my feelings. He is respectful and considerate that way. This is bound to happen anyway. He is the best bestfriend anyone could have ever asks for and he deserves to be happy,” Y/N dropped her gaze to the ground. “It just makes me thinks, that’s all. If my own best friend who knows me more than 20 years cant fall in love with me, then I probably dont have anything to offer that could attract anyone. I guess Im just not worthy to be loved,” she chuckles.

“Dont you dare say that,” Jimin growled. “Just because Jihyun cant see what perfection is, doesnt mean everybody else is the same Y/N,” Jimin pulled her in for a tight hug. “Somebody loves you. You just have to find him in the right places,” like right now, I’m here, right in front of you.  Jimin sighed. If only he can confessed to her right now, but looking at the situation, this is definitely not the right time. “So stop crying. A pretty girl like you should never cry over a boy. Especially over my stupid little brother,” Jimin teased as he passed her his handkerchief to wiped up all her tears.

God, Jimin hate to see her cry. He hate it when she was younger and he hate seeing it even more now. Only back then he used to think its because he cares for her like a sister, but now he knows better.

Y/N and Jimin spend the remaining of the party at the balcony, and Y/N felt like she had never laughed this much throughout her whole life. Not even with Jihyun, her best friend for years. It could probably just be because she’s drunk, as she keeps on refilling her empty glass, or it could be that Jimin is really funny and interesting as hell, and she just finally realizing the fact that they might have a lot in common, and she loves spending time with him.

But as morning arrived and Y/N wakes up naked and alone on her bed, with only a used condom tied up in her wastebasket and a man’s handkerchief by her nightstand, memory swipe clean from remembering anything that had happened the night before, Y/N’s only salvation is the tiny bit of blurry memory that she had met and spend time with a wonderful man last night, a man for the life of her she cant remember who, and it becomes her life mission to found out who it is.

“Maybe you got too drunk and just imagined it Y/N,” Jihyun said as he stuffed his face with a spoonful of cereal as both if them are having their usual breakfast in the kitchen. Y/N looked at her best friend in irritation. Its been a couple of days since the party and she’s still trying to backtrack her steps and remember who the mystery man is.

“I’m not dreaming Jihyun! It really happened! I know I had the most wonderful conversation and time with the mystery man, although I cant really remember the sex part though,” she grumbles, frustrated that she got to drunk and forget most of the night. “Then he must not be that great in bed if you can remember the appertizer but not the main course ,” Jihyun laughs at his own joke as Y/N hit him hard in the arm making him winced in pain, not amused with her best friend.

“What makes you think the sex is the main course? What if I actually prefer and enjoy talking to someone rather than having sex with them?” She glared at him. “And I know he’s real Jihyun. He left this remember?” Y/N placed the handkerchief on the kitchen counter, the only clue she have on her mystery man as she sighed. She is positive it belongs to hin, whoever he is.

Who are you? And why are you hiding your identity from me?

/////

It almost been a week since Jimin went to visit Jihyun’s apartment after the party. He misses Y/N so much, but after what he did that night, he just cant bare to looked Y/N in the eyes.  How can he? The guilt he felt is too much. He slept with her. But what makes him more guilty is not the fact that he did, but the fact that he enjoys it. That it has become the most magical night of his life and Y/N dont even remember in opposed to Jimin who is stark sober and remember every detail that happened that night.

How can he feel this way towards his litlle brother’s best friend? How can he take advantage of her like that?

He actually slept with Y/N.

How could he go back and pretend like nothing happen? How can he contained his feelings in front of her now that he knows how good she feels like in his arms? How perfect she is with him? He cant possibly tell her about what happened that night. He cant possibly tell her about his feelings either. She would hate him if she found out, and he cant have that. He rather swallowed all his pain and have her close than have her hating him.

So he did what all man who are in love and afraid would do. He avoided her.

/////

“Hey Jihyun. Mom told me she send me a package through you. Im here to pick it up,” Jimin yelled out for his brother as he entered the apartment. He specifically chose this time to come over because he knows Y/N’s class schedule like the back of his hand. He wouldnt want to risk running into her. No, he cant have that

“Oh yeah, its on the kitchen counter,” Jihyun yelled back as he makes his way to his brother from his room. Jimin went to picked up the heavy package and as he is about to walk away he saw his handkerchief that Y/N has laid out on the counter a days before.

Oh here it is. Didnt remember that I left it here. Jimin shrugged, assuming he must have left it during one of his visits, not remembering that he use it at the party at all and picked it up.

“Hyung… is that… is that yours?” Jihyun who walked into the kitchen just in time to see Jimin pocketed the handkerchief asks with eyes widen in shocked.

“Yeah. Its mine. I must have left it here by accident. Anyway, I gotta go, I’m late for practice as it is. See you later dongsaeng,” Jimin gave a tiny wave goodbye and hurriedly exited the apartment before Jihyun can say anything.

Jihyun stood frozen in his place, mouth wide open at the realization of what he just saw.

Y/N and his hyung?

Y/N, his childhood best friend and Park Jimin, his beloved hyung?

“Oh My God,” was all that could come out from his mouth.

/////

“Hyung, I need to talk to you,” Jihyun urgently said as he stepped inside his brother’s dorm.

“Woah, calm down. What happened?”

“Tell me the truth now hyung. I know you dont drink at parties, so you must be extremely sober and remember everything. So tell me, did you or did you not sleep with Y/N the night of her birthday?”

Jihyun’s question took Jimin by surprised. Why is his brother suddenly asking him such an intimate question? And such a bold question too? Shit, did Y/N send him here? Did Y/N  finally remembers and found out?  She cant be. She was really drunk that night. Did someone saw him leaving Y/N’s room?

“Hyung! Answer me!” Jihyun is growing impatient at his brother’s silence. Jimin hesitates but answered anyway.

“Yeah.. yeah.. I did,” he hung his head low in embarassement.

“What the fuck hyung?!”

“Jihyun, language! I’m still your hyung!” Jimin was surprised. His brother has never spoken out of line to him before.

“I dont that matters right now! She’s my best friend hyung! You cant just play with her like you do to other girls!” Jihyun is furious. He knows how good looking his brother is and how girls flocked around him. He also knows how Jimin never wanted a serious relationship. He is an idol anyway, he doesnt have time for that. But to play around with Y/N? Especially when the said girl kept on saying she felt some chemistry between her and the mystery guy from that night? Its just unacceptable!

Jimin, on the other hand is furious about his brother’s accusation. How dare he accused and assumed that he’s playing Y/N? Even if he isnt madly in love with her right now, he would never do that to her. He cares about her enough to not ever treat her like one of his common girls. And now that he’s fallen deep for her… well, it just makes him angry.

“How dare you say I’m just playing here!” Jimin growled at his brother who doesnt seem affected by his anger.

“You knew you slept with her but you didnt say anything? You left her to wake up alone and avoided her all week hyung! She spent all week trying to find who’s the mystery man she claimed to have such a wonderful time with that night and you just kept quiet like an idiot!” It irritates Jimin to hear his brother calling him names but he got a much bigger issue in hand. He will handle Jihyun’s insolance later.

“Wait, she remembers?”

“Well, she dont really remember the… sleeping together part,” Jihyun awkwardly said as he scratched his arm. He really didnt want to talk about his brother sex life, especially one involving his best friend. “And also the who part. But she believes the man she spent the night with is her perfect match. She claimed to have such a wonderful time with him,”

“Really?” Jimin cant help but give out a huge smile, turning his eyes into slits as Jihyun gave him an annoyed looked.

“Well, that was until she remembered it was you who she spend the time with earlier today when I told her you took the hanky, which you left the night you spend it with her, I might add. She had a sudden shocked and started to scream ‘oh my god its Jimin oppa’ before she starts to cry and ran out of the apartment,”

“What?! Where is she now?”

“I dont know, that is why I came here to find you,”

“And you didnt think to start with that? You are really an idiot Jihyun!” Jimin immediately grabbed his jacket and exited the door, trying to locate Y/N as fast as he could, leaving his idiotic brother who is still stunned by his reaction standing in the dorm.

Please be safe. And please dont hate me Y/N.

/////

Y/N swing her legs on the bench she was seating at as the cold night wind blows on her face. She has no more tears left to cry and her mind is blank. After Jihyun told him that Jimin took the hanky and claimed that it was his, a barrage of memories came crashing down on her. She remembers the talk they had at the balcony. How she laughs and laughs, how Jimin’s laughs sounds a like a beautiful tune to her ears, flashing her his eye smile and how she felt her heart beats a little faster whenever she caught Jimin just staying silent and staring at her. That moment was the first time in her life that she finally met someone who was able to make her forget about Jihyun. She remembers how she leads him into the bedroom and how they start to kiss each other, Jimin’s lips felt soft on hers before the kiss turned heated and passionate, filled with lust and want. She remembered how Jimin stared into her eyes as they both lay panting afterwards, and how he kiss her forehead and whispered multiple times that he loves her.

I love you Y/N. I really really love you. I love you so much.

Y/N close her eyes as the sound of Jimin whispering promises of love after they make love keeps on repeating in her head. Tears starts to trickled down her face again. She knows that Jimin remembers everything. He admit it himself that he dont get drunk anymore. But if he really meant what he said, that he really loves her, then why did he avoided her? Why didnt he tell her? Why didnt he say anything? Y/N felt like she shared a connection with the man from that night, but if the man is really Jimin, then she must have only imagining it. Jimin doesnt love her. He cant possibly. Especially now that she knows he is avoiding her after that night.

“Y/N,”

Y/N turned her head to see Jimin huffing out puffs of cold smoke as he walks towards her, looking extremely tired and bewildered, as if he had ran all the way here from god knows where.

“I found you. I actually found you! Thank god,” he sat down besides her, carressing her cold cheeks.

Y/N quickly wiped her eyes and try to smile, acting as if nothing happened, as if she didnt know anything. “Hi oppa. What are you doing here? Why are you looking for me?”

Jimin grabbed both her shoulders and turn her to face him. “Dont act like nothing happened Y/N. I know you know. Jihyun told me everything,”

Y/N released herself from Jimin’s gripped and scooted away from him. Fucking hell Jihyun, do you really have to ran off and tell it to your brother? Y/N make a mental note to beat Jihyun up when she gets home.

“I… uh… ah,”

“I’m sorry Y/N. I’m really really sorry,” Jimin pulled her by the wrist. Y/N shakes her head when she heard him apologizes.

“No oppa. I’m the one who should be sorry. I was the one who was drunk and probably threw myself at you. You have nothing to be sorry for. You-”

“What are you talking about?” Jimin growled. “I have plenty to be sorry for. I’m sorry for leaving you alone the next morning. I’m sorry for pretending like nothing happened. I’m sorry for acting like I didn’t know anything. I’m sorry for making you scared and confused. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything to you earlier,” Jimin now held both of her hands in his. “I’m sorry for making you feel like I took advantage of you Y/N. You deserved to be treated like a queen, not being left alone, confused and vulnerable after a night like that,” Jimin dropped his head in shame. He wished he could stay with her that night. To wake up with her by his side. To see her smiling face when he opens his eyes, but Jimin was afraid. Afraid that Y/N will only hate him if she knew about his feelings for her.

“Its okay oppa. I understand why you did it. Someone like you slept with someone like me, of course you dont want anyone to know about it,” Y/N gave a tiny smile, trying to hide her sadness.

“What the hell does that mean?” Jimin’s eyes flashed in anger. “Dont you ever dare think of yourself that way ever again! You… you are perfect to me Y/N,” Jimin’s voice turned soft. Y/N shakes her head again, diagreeing with him.

“Lets… lets just forget this whole thing ever happened and go back to like it was before,” Y/N suggested, emotionally tired to deal with anything anymore.

“I cant do that Y/N,” Jimin said in a serious tone, making Y/N’s eyes turned wide. “I cant go back to acting like you are just my little brother’s best friend…” he paused for a moment before continuing. “When… when I want to be so much more to you. I cant go back to before, acting like there is nothing between us when I can no longer contained my feelings for you,” Y/N blinked at his confession. “I dont know if you remember Y/N, but I already told you that night and I will tell it to you again. I love you Y/N. I am in love with you. Im in love with everything you are, and with everything I am, I promise I will try to make you happy, if you would have me,” Jimin smile.

“Im sorry for hurting you. For making you feel unworthy and unloved. That was never my intention. I was afraid if I stayed with you that night or told you what happened, you will be disgusted with me. And I cant bare to have you hate me Y/N,” Jimin closes his eyes before opening them again. “Jihyun told me that you felt a connection with that man you spend the night with Y/N. And I want you to know that I felt it too. No one was ever able to make me feel things like you do,”

Y/N finally flashed the biggest smile at his words. “I could never be disgusted or angry with you oppa…”

Jimin smile back and slowly starts to leaned in closer to her, inhaling her familiar scent that he missed. “I have never felt happier than I did during that night oppa. I cant even remember who is it but I can still remember the butterflies in my stomach, the way my heart races as I spend the night laughing away. I knew I fell in love that night. I was confused but deep down, I’m glad it was you oppa,”

Jimin nuzzled his nose with hers as he scooted in closer, pulling her in by the waist. He looks up into her eyes.

“So I take it you dont have a crush on Jihyun anymore?”

“I dont think so. But I might have to checked. Maybe I need to see his face one more time,” she teased.

“Y/N…” Jimin growled in warning, making her laugh. Jimin knows she’s joking, but he still felt a sense of jealousy at the thought of his dream girl lusting over his own brother.

“This is so cliche isnt it? Falling inlove with you best friend’s older brother?”

Jimin placed his hand behind her neck and whispered against her lips, “Yeah, its nothing new to fall in love with your brother’s best friend, but what you are making me feel everyday when I’m with you is definitely something new to me Y/N,” Jimin whispered softly in her ear as he closes his eyes, leans in closer and finally do what he had wanting to do for so long and touched his lips with hers, sealing their love for each other for eternity.

[httpdabi]

My Dad’s Friend

Word count: 4.6k

Characters: Shin Hoseok x Reader

Genres: Smut, comedy. romance

Warnings: 18+, rough sex, age gap

I was never interested in older guys, like my other friends. For them it was normal to hook up with married guy, to be with a guy who is 10 or more years older then them. For me, it was a no go. I always stuck with guys that are around my age. Until I met him, my father’s friend, Shin Hoseok.

I was never interested in older guys, like my other friends. For them it was normal to hook up with married guy, to be with a guy who is 10 or more years older then them. For me, it was a no go. I always stuck with guys that are around my age.

They used to laugh at me, saying that I dont have taste, but what could i do ? I just didn’t find them attractive enough, that’s all.

I checked if all my stuff were in my bag, my charger, pj, toothbrush and so, before I turned off the lights and made my way out.

Wearing my jacket, I made my way to kitchen and took the brownie from the table and placed it whole in my mouth, hoping she didn’t notice.

,, Miryo, that’s for our guest, do you have to eat everything that’s on the table ?’’ she asked me and rolled her eyes. I just mumbled YES with full mouth and waved her goodbye.

I almost forgot that tonight dad’s friend will visit us. As I understood, they didn’t see each other for a long time, so he will come and stay few days. Honestly, I never saw my dad so excited, he was acting like a child.

While I was wearing my boots, my mother was screaming from kitchen how I have to behave when I get home and not embarrass them. Like I ever did, duhh.

I took my earphones and played some music, since time and walk always goes faster like that. Imagining some stuff that will never happened, I arrived fast and I already found myself knocking on my best friends door.

Since her parents went on vacation, she asked them if she can invite few friends and of course they allowed it.

I was really surprised to see that I was the last one to arrive, since I was always the first one. They were sitting on the balcony and waiting for me to change in my PJ so we can open some wine.

Just when I got back, they started talking about some drama, break ups and shits. Ok just in time.

,,He just texted me how he’s sorry he hurt my feelings, but if we really think about it it’s actually my fault for having feelings in the first place’’ she said trying to fit a whole slice of pizza in her mouth.

,, Well, he’s kinda right. You knew that he’s married from the beginning. What did you think that he’ll divorce and come to you ? ‘’ my best friend Hani said and I totally agreed with her.

,, Not really, but I mean.. I don’t know’’ Yura said and shook her head. It was really funny to me the way she behaved,  they could easily ruin a family and they didn’t give a single fuck.

,, And girls, I’m officially taken’’ Minah said proudly.

,, As a fucking joke’’ I said and Hani choked on her food. Minah gave me that REALLY???? Look and pattet Hani on her back, so she can come to her self.

,, You should just shut up and go babysit your boyfriends’’ Minah said after some time. It took her long enough to come with something at me.

,, By the way, why don’t you talk with Kyungsoo anymore? I thought you guys were like best friends ?’’ I asked Yura curiously. We didn’t meet for a long time, so there were a lot of things to talk about.

,, Satan was God’s best friend’’ she simply said making me laugh a little bit.

I loved times when we hang out together, just gossiping people and talking about what happened. Not worrying about anyone or anything.

,,  What are you up tomorrow?’’ Hani asked me and she took a sip from her glass.

,, I don’t even know honestly, my fathers friend is coming in visit, so I’ll probably just stay at home and maybe spend some time with them, my parents are making a bbq again’’ I said and leaned on the wall. Minah and Yura went to sleep because the wine hit them and yeah.. so I ended up with Hani talking about random crap till very late.

,, Why do you need to hang out with them ? Since when are you hanging out with your father’s friends’’ ? she said laughing a little bit.

,, I don’t even know that man. They said that he used to visit us often when I was a kid and that he used to buy me ice cream and toys and that I always liked him so much’’ I said and took a sip of my wine.

,, But I couldn’t find any photos of him and I don’t remember how he looks at all. ‘’ I added and Hani nodded her head.

It was around 3:30 AM when we went to bed. We fall asleep extremely fast, probably because of wine. Even tho we fall asleep late, I woke up pretty early, I tried to sleep again but I couldn’t, so I slowly went out of the bed quiet as possible, trying not to wake up anyone. I took my stuff, covered Hani and went to the toilet to change, before leaving the apartment.

It was a good idea going home early, since the fresh air helped me come to myself. Since it was really early, I saw few people walking around with their dogs. Well, it wasn’t that early , 8 AM, but still.

When I got home, I tried to get in the house quietly so I don’t wake them all up here too. I went to my room, changed in my comfortable clothes and then I went to the kitchen and made myself a cup of coffee before I went in the living room and turned the neflix on.

Only God knows till how late they were awake since none of them was awake. I let the Lucky one play on Netflix and I could catch myself dozing out sometimes. Giving up, I placed the cup and my phone on the table and fall asleep on the sofa.

I wasn’t asleep for too long, since when I woke up the movie wasn’t even half done. But it’s not the movie that woke me up, it was the person who was moving in the arm chair. I moved in shock and saw a man sitting and watching me.  

Honestly I didn’t know how to react at all, because not every day you have someone watching you sleep. Since it was still early for me, it was hard for me to realize what’s going on. Then I remembered that it was my dad’s friend.

,, Oh I’m sorry, good morning. I’m Miryo’’ I said and bowed down.

,, You changed so much. You don’t remember me, don’t you ? ‘’ he said and smiled softly. I just shook my head and he smiled once again.

,, I’m Hoseok, when you were little girl I used to take care of you often.’’ He said and he took his cup of coffee.

I looked at him like a moron. Honestly, I thought that person can be so handsome. His blonde hair looked so soft, and his lips. And he didn’t even look old at all, for a moment I was thinking that he was some kind of vampire. SO MAGNIFICENT.Oh my GOD. He probably noticed what was going on, since he smirked and laughed a little bit.

His teeth were so damn perfect, I was even more shocked. I just looked back at the tv acting like I didn’t even look at him, feeling totally embarrassed.

But damn

,, So, what are you doing ? Uni ? or you just became a princess as you used to say you will’’ he said making me laugh a little bit.

,, I am uni student, majoring in art ‘’ I said simply and nodded my head still embarrassed.

,, Nice, I knew that you will become something when you grow up’’ he said comfortably. I wanted to stand up and go to my room, I felt so freaking horrible, I felt like I was sinning. It was so hard to take my eyes off of him.

,, Morning’’ my dad said and I just thanked God he entered the room. First time in my life I just wanted to jump on someone.

I was going crazy, I swear

,, Good morning, slept well? ‘’Hoseok said and my father nodded his head.  While they were chit-chatting, I stood up and found a medicine to kill my headache.

,, Had a wild night?’’ my dad asked smiling.

,, Not really, we just drank a little bit of wine’’ I said and shook my head. Well, 3 bottles of wine isn’t so much, is it ?

Better then vodka, thinking about strong drinks made me want to vomit immediately. One time we were mixing strong drinks way too much, I was never drunk like that. Since that night, I cant even smell vodka or anything else.

,, Are you allowed to drink alcohol?? ‘’ Hoseok asked in some weird tone, making me confused for a second.

,, Sure, I’m 21 years old, why not’’ I said and smiled back I guess ? He simply nodded his head and smiled again.

So weird.

After short time, my mother woke up and made a breakfast for us. I couldn’t eat so much, but I was still waiting till they are all done, so I can clean everything up.

,, Honey, Soyon called me yesterday and asked me if we can jump in, two people are sick on work’’ my mom said slowly, chewing her food.

,, What ? no way, I told them that Wonho is coming in visit’’ he said pissed off.

,, I know, I know. But it’s just for short, probably one or two hours and tomorrow in the morning. I couldn’t say no’’ she said and he somehow agreed.

,, Miryo, you can go with me and buy everything for tonight’’ Hoseok said while giving me some serious look.

,, Sure’’ I said a little bit lost. What’s up with this man.

,, Good girl’’ he said and winked and then he smiled at me. Oh god that smile, it hit me more then his words.

,, Oh, can you remember ? Wonho used to call you a good girl every time you listened to him’’ my mom said and smiled.

When they finished eating, my parents went to change, while Hoseok was just sitting there, watching me cleaning.

,, You grew up really well’’ he said and I could feel him somehow checking me out. I don’t know did I feel uncomfortable or not honestly.

I just smiled and turned around to wash the dishes. He didn’t speak or anything and I thought that he went to change or something, but then I felt him leaning on. He was so close to me, so close that I could feel his breath. He just took the glass and went away from me.

It took me few minutes to calm down and come to myself again. My breathing wasn’t normal anymore. In few seconds, he placed the empty glass beside me and I just took it, so I can wash it with other dishes.

,, Good girl’’ he said and tapped my back, before he went out of the kitchen, leaving me all alone in shock.

Maybe I was just imagining things ? Overacting?

,, Honey, we are going’’ I heard my mom screaming and then I heard the door closing, loudly.

I just finished cleaning the kitchen and I went in my room. I sat on my bed and messaged Hani about what happened. I wanted to know her opinion, she is my best friend after all.

It all made me so confused and honestly, I couldn’t believe that I had such a naughty thoughts about a older man. Older man that used to watch over me when I was kid.

It was so damn wrong.

I was probably just imagining it all.

While I was lying on my bed, I heard a knock on my door and all of sudden Hoseok went in.

,, You ready?’’ he asked me as he crossed his arms. I just nodded my head and I took my phone and my wallet fast before I went out of my room with him.

The drive was silence, first because I was too busy throwing glances on him and secondly I was a little bit uncomfortable to talk to him.

,, When you were little, you were always talking so much. I can’t believe you are so quiet now’’ he said looking on the road. Oh God, if you only know

In the shop I was looking for some snacks and stupid stuff and Hoseok was just following me around and taking everything my parents need.

Gosh, he was so perfect

I had snacks in my hands, but damn he was a much better, looking like a whole snack.

,, GIRL’’ I heard a scream from some other side of shop. I turned around and saw Hani and Jungkook coming my way.

,, WHY DID YOU LEAVE SO EARLY?’’ she screamed on me, acting like we didn’t talk about it or something.

,, and where is the man ? Is he home ?’’ she asked me and i gave her a weird look to keep quiet. She opened her mouth and looked, I’m not sure at me or beside me.

,, Hello’’ I heard Hoseoks voice and I understood why she had that expression.

,, Thanks god Yura is not here, if she is she would –‘’ Jungkook said and Hani covered his mouth before he could say anything.

,, Anyway, are we going out tonight ?’’ Jungkook asked me.

,, I cant go out tonight, I promised my parents ill stay home with them tonight’’ I said and Jungkook was about to protest, but at the end he just kept quiet.

,, Miryo, we need to go’’ Hoseok said and placed his one arm around me, giving me a sign that he want’s to pay and leave.

,, See ya’’ I said and I wiggled out of his hold and hugged Jungkook and Hani, before we went away. I was placing the food and preparing my wallet, since the most of the food were just my snacks.

,, I will pay’’ he said firmly. I was about to protest, but when he looked at me I got lost, just like Jungkook few minutes ago.

When we went home, he was talking a little bit more then before. He even asked me do I have a boyfriend and when I said no, he was really surprised and he told me that he didn’t expect that since I grew up into such a beautiful WOMAN

In short time my parents came back, so I just locked myself in my room leaving them all alone. Sometimes I could hear loud laugh. I felt really happy for my father, it was a long time since he laughed like that. My father was always just so stressed because of his work, so this visit probably was really something great for him.

Sometimes when I would go downstairs to take something, I could feel Hoseok looking at me. But I swear, I was sure that I was just imagining it, since my parents didn’t notice anything.

The whole day I couldn’t stop thinking about him. The whole fucking day, I was just thinking about the way he behaved. I tried to believe that that’s the way he usually behaves.

When the time came, I went downstairs and helped my mother prepare all the meat for bbq, salad and everything, while Hoseok and my father were talking in the living room and drinking whisky.

The meat and everything was done, so I slowly started to take it out, while they were preparing the tables and everything.

My mother didn’t want to call so much people, she didn’t want to have stressful night dealing with many people, so she just called few friends.

The whole night was really boring for me, all of them were talking about stupid stuff that weren’t really interesting to me, so I was just spending my time talking with Hani on the phone, eating and drinking wine again.

To Hani Bani : ,, You should just come over, it’s so damn boring.’’

Hani Bani : ,, I can’t, I promised Jungkook that we’ll go out tonight. Where is the hottie?’’

I rolled my eyes on the nickname she gave to Hoseok and smiled accidentally on the phone.

To Hani Bani: ,, The hottie is flirting with mom’s friend from work. I swear I want to punch them both in the face’’

My blood was boiling,  I was really right when I thought that it was his usual behavior.

Hani Bani : ,, Well he does look like a flirt. But honestly, he probably sees you like a little sister. You probably imagined everything’’

To Hani Bani : ,, I know, I know. He is still hot tho, wouldn’t mind if he buys me ice cream again haha :P’’

To Hani Bani : ,, God, he is so damn hot.. I wouldn’t mind if he gives me more then ice cream’’

Hani Bani : ,, Can’t believe you are having such a thoughts about older man.. it’s so not you’’

Hani Bani : ,, But I don’t blame you tho…..’’

I smiled again reading the messages and locked my phone leaving it on the table. Everyone was still talking and Hoseok was leaning and whispering something to the women beside him.

,, Did everyone eat already? I would like to clean and go to bed if it’s not a problem’’ I said and my mom just nodded and told me just to leave the wine on the table.

I was so pissed off, I couldn’t watch him flirt with that women anymore. So I just cleaned everything fast, while everyone was commenting how a nice daughter I am.

When I was done, I didn’t go to my room immediately, I just lied on sofa and watched Netflix, trying not to think about that man.

,, Miryo, can you just place the rest of the dishes in the washing machine, your mother drank a little bit more then usual’’ my father woke me up. I was surprised that I fall asleep so fast, I guess that lack of sleep got me tired.

I nodded my head and went in the kitchen, while my father wished me a good night and went to sleep. When I was done, I turned around to take my phone and then I saw Hoseok sitting there and honestly I almost had a heartattack.

,, You shocked me ‘’ I said and placed a hand on my chest, still shocked.

What shocked me more was the fact that he was having my phone in his hands, like it’s his.

,, What are you doing ?’’ I asked, mad, shocked, everything at once.

,, .. I wouldn’t mind if he gives me more then ice cream’’ he simply said.It took me more then a second to realize that he was reading my messages with Hani.

,, Give me that’’ I said, almost screamed at him and grabbed my phone from his hands. I couldn’t believe that something like this could happen.

,, I already read everything’’ he said and smirked.

,, Didn’t you ever hear about word ‘privacy’ ?’’ I asked and turned around to leave. Never in my life did I feel so embarrassed like this whole day. Plus, this situation was like a cherry on top.

,, Where do you think you are going ?’’ he asked me as he grabbed my arm and pulled me back. I was so shocked I honestly didn’t even know what to say.

,, You know, I can still give you more then ice cream’’ he said looking down on me. I felt so small, I felt like I would die if I answer him anything.

He grabbed me all of sudden and placed me on the table, forcing his knee between my legs making some place for him self.

,, You think I didn’t notice how you were looking at me and Soyon? ‘’ he whispered on my ear, feeling his hot breath made me shiver. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm down. But I wasn’t even sure if that was a mistake or a good move, because just when I did it, I felt his lips on my neck.

,, Stop it’’ I said and pulled my head back. He ignored me and just continued to kiss my neck, probably leaving some marks on it.

,, I just wanted to see which guy made you smile on your phone like crazy.. reading those messages, I realized you want this as much as I do’’ he said and attacked my neck again.

,, This I wrong’’ I said as my breathing got even heavier then before.

,, You are 21, it’s not’’ he said and looked me in the eyes. Just looking at him, his eyes, lips, body, even hair made me wanna scream on loud

His hands were on my cheeks, while his eyes only left mine to look on my lips. Then he slowly got closer and gave me a peck on my lips.

One peck..

Second peck

Third peck

Fuck it

If all my friends could do it, why couldn’t I ? He wasn’t even married or in relationship after all

I placed my hands around his neck and he immediately attacked my lips. There were no sweet pecks anymore, only tongue, only French kiss. His lips were softer then they looked and damn was he a good kisser.

After some time, he let me have some air and he attacked my neck again.

,, Let’s go to your room’’ he said and he picked me up, holding my ass, as my legs were wrapped around him. While he was walking, I was the one kissing his neck while he was the one with the deep breathing now.

He opened the door slowly and placed me on my bed hovering over me immediately and attacking my lips once again. Not wasting any time, he took my shirt off and unhooked my bra throwing it somewhere in my room.

His lips were again on my neck, while his right hand was on my breast. He was slowly making his way down until his lips replaced his hand. I felt like he was leaving a mark on every place his lips touched me.

Standing up, he took off his shirt and threw it away. His body was perfect. More then perfect. He looked like a God.

He slowly took of my pants and hovered over me once again. His muscular arms were wrapped around my body and he kissed me again, a little bit more aggressively then before. I moaned in his mouth when he squeezed my ass. I licked his lip then and slowly nibbled on it, but I think that he wasn’t so patient, he wanted much more.

Hoseok looked at me deeply and bit on my bottom lip, making me moan quietly again.

He knew I was inpatient as much as he was. I wrapped my hands around his torso and pulled him closer to me, spreading my legs making more space for him. I could feel his hard cock inside his jeans. I rubbed my hands all over his chest, his abs and I felt him shivering with every touch.

All of sudden, I felt his fingers rubbing my clit, his touch was so intense, then he put two fingers into my pussy and started fingering me fast, making me moan louder then I should.

,, Be quiet baby, we don’t want you parents to hear us’’ he said slowing down. I nodded my head and bit my lips and he just went back to fingering me fast.

,, Good girl’’ he whispered and took his fingers out. I was a little bit disappointed when I felt his hand moving away, but at the same time, I wanted to feel him already. He took my panties off and stood up to take his jeans and boxers off.

He climbed back on top of me and rubbed his hard cock around my clit. He smirked when he saw my expression, I couldn’t take it any longer.

I guess he couldn’t wait anymore either, since he slid his cock into me without a warning.  I moaned again and he grabbed my chin ,, Quiet’’ he said and he pushed himself into me deeper and roughly.

He started thrusting slowly but hard into my wet hole. He looked at me with every thrust and kissed my lips gently.

,, Baby, you’re so tight’’’ he sad thrusting deeper slowly. I felt so full with him inside me, he was so damn huge. After several thrusts he began to work harder on me, he moved faster and harder and I was fighting with myself, trying to hold my moans.

He then stopped suddenly and turned me around. He placed one hand over my mouth and another on the end of my bed. Then he slammed his cock into me from behind, he wasn’t slow at all, and he didn’t take anything back, he was just fucking me from behind like there was no tomorrow.

He kept driving his cock in and out of me, hitting my G-spot with every move. I closed my eyes as I felt his hot breath on my neck. I had sex for a few times before, but only this time it felt right. It felt like never before and now I understood why my friends were into older guys. But I was sure, that no one of them was like Hoseok. No one.

My walls were clenched on his cock tightly. He knew that I was about to cum and he just started to fuck me faster and harder, going deeper with every move. I was thankful that his hand was covering my mouth, if it didn’t, my parents would definitely be awake by now.

I closed my eyes and gave myself in when the orgasm hit me. ,, That’s it babygirl, cum for me’’ he said, not stopping. He pushed three more times into me, before he also reached his orgasm. After few gentle thrusts, he took it out. We were breathless, it was really hard to breath properly. He pulled me closer to him and we shared a long passionate kiss. He hugged me and kissed me on the lips before he stood up and wore his boxers and jeans.

,, Just a second’’ he said and went out but just in a minute he was back with his pj in his hands. He wore his shorts and gave me my pajama so I can wear it in bed.

I was looking at him while he was spraying the deo over his body.

,, Are your parents on work tomorrow ?’’ he asked me getting closer to the bed.

,, I think so, yes’’ I said remembering their conversation how they need to jump in and I  nodded my head somehow. I was exhausted and I couldn’t move at all.

,, Perfect.’’ He said and he locked the door before he went back in my bed and placed his long arms around me.

I thought that I would feel so bad after this, but I didn’t. He wasn’t married, he didn’t have a girlfriend, he was just my father’s friend. And after all this, I was sure that I would never look at anyone the same way as I did before.

[addamsgoth]

ask meme

i was tagged by @carnahann thank you!!

rules: tag 10 followers you want to get to know better

star sign: sagittarius

gender: female(?)

height: 5′7″ babey

sexuality: bi

what image do you have as your wallpaper? that “do it for her” meme but its all pics of finn from star wars ldkjflsdjflsd ive had it for like two years

where do you see yourself in 10 years? living in a small but charming b&b in paris where no one knows who i am, writing and flirting with the wómên and spending my mornings reading the paper with massive sunglasses and a sunhat on

if you could be anywhere else right now, where? this is sappy but like?? i’d really like to be with my friends rn slkdfjlds ive been babysitting my brother so i havent been able to go Out so i havent seen much of anyone (but!! going out this saturday with a friend :’))

what was your coolest halloween costume? i had a really cool vampire costume one year :’) and i was a harry potter character another year

what’s your favorite 90s show? uhhhhhhh buffy the vampire slayer even though ive only watched like. half a season of it lksdfjlsdjf i dont watch a lot of 90s tv sorry

last kiss?: [static]

have you ever been stood up?: nope

have you ever been to vegas?: nope sldkfj

favorite pair of shoes: my docs!!

favorite fruit: strawberries 

favorite book: fuck uhh ari and dante is definitely one of them but i dont think i can pick a single favourite book rip

favorite gif: (nsfw)

im tagging: @shortviolet @hauntedmansion2003 @softelesbian @bodhis @finnforce @spacelesbians @classicrockwlw @dravidians @skygualker @filmsoundtracks

[huntypastellance]

hi its me @keithkog on twitter and since you so conveniently forget to mention all the times i’ve apologized and when i deleted the video or any of my explanation, let me tell you about it. there was no excuse for me to post videos without the parent’s consent. that i agree with. it was stupid and wrong, and i genuinely regret that. once i realized my mistake, i deleted the videos. there is NO EXCUSE FOR THAT. but the “sexual assault” thing was unprompted. i never talked about that with her (1/)

and i also never said anything about it. obviously she doesn’t know what that means, since as an anti i still dont think “sexual assault” is a correct term for sheith, its more statutory rape if you’re going to put it into that category w the age of consent. but of course she wouldn’t understand that, and i only laughed in the video bc i was taken aback by her knowledge of that word. regardless, i didn’t press the issue further because you’re right, i have no right to talk about that with a (2/)

a child im babysitting. so i just left it at that. look, i understand if you’re upset by it because you’re a shaladin but you’re making me seem like some huge monster. voltron is literally made for kids their age, and the term “force” was a joke. we’ve watched it together before, and they only protested bc they’re stubborn but they actually rlly enjoyed it after i showed them more. the point i was making about them being mature was in response to someone saying “she’s only 9 she shouldn’t be(3/)

watching voltron” which i disagreed with because both of the girls are mature for their age and can understand it. the only reason they thought it was confusing was bc when we watched episode 1 we were making cookies and they werent paying attention the whole time. i would appreciate if you would take down your posts or at least remove some things because in no way did i force them to talk about sex or bring it up in the first place. thank you.

ps, you have no proof that i fed anyone lines about sexual assault and i promise you i DID NOT. the kid’s parents let them watch a lot of older shows and they have older sibblings and thats how they know about it im guessing. i was surprised to but please don’t accuse me of feeding them lines about sexual assault because thats absolutely disgusting and you have no proof of that

do you exist purely to ignore people’s apologies? Bc my friend the one y'all keep talking about from Twitter, yeah she’s apologized multiple times so could y'all maybe just leave her alone? Bc she had literally 0 intentions for what happened to happen and the fact you all ignore her constant apologies here y'all are being petty and I’m honestly sick of it. Grow the FUCK up y'all she’s a minor too CHRIST. You think it’s ok to harass a minor? Bc if so y'all are even worse than my abuser lmao :/ 

Okay, I’m going to answer this seriously & without the whole “We, the Great & Glorious Lord Pastel Lance” schtick even though I don’t think you actually deserve it. I’m just trying to prove my point here.

> If you were so shocked that a 9 year old said the phrase “sexual assault”, why did you POST IT ONLINE AS A VIDEO TWEET?

>Oh boohoo, you took it down. What, do you want a gold star for that? Well newsflash asshole, if you had bothered to read through my post, you’d know that someone archived your entire tweet thread before you took down the videos. So now there are PERMANENT screenshots of the kids’ faces that were put online WITHOUT PARENTAL PERMISSION because of YOU, you illiterate jackass.

> Why would you EVER laugh at a child, who you’ve claimed to know & babysat for YEARS, having ANY knowledge of what sexual assault is?

> Nice try deflecting dumbass, I’m a Klance shipper AND a Sheith shipper, not just some gross shallie.

> Again, you don’t MAKE kids like the stuff you like. My brothers don’t like Ben 10 after the first 5 minutes of showing them it, (& without me trying to convince them by telling them that gets “really good” later & spoiling shit for them), so I switch the channel to Paw Patrol or search up a Youtube about Minecraft for them instead. I don’t MAKE them continue to marathon Ben 10 with me. You are a shit babysitter.

> Why do you keep suddenly being surprised when people get mad at your own freaking words when you are the one leaving out information & context? 

> It’s still really creepy that you keep saying that the kids are “mature for their age”. That’s literally fucking pedo logic right there, I don’t care about the fucking context, that’s a skeevy thing to say about kids.

> Seriously, what the fuck is stopping you from using the phrase “they’re old enough to watch Voltron, see the TV rating for it?” That is literally so much less creepier.

> You can’t just fucking ASSUME that the kids learned the phrase “sexual assault” from watching TV shows for older kids! That is something you NEED to tell the parents about!

> And you’re not even worried about those older siblings casually talking about sexual assault in front of their baby siblings? At all? Bitch, there are some things that SHOULDN’T be talked about in front of kids!!

> Well, you’re right in that I don’t have actual proof. But given how you & your friends constantly lie & refuse to provide any proof, I don’t give a shit. At this rate, a freaking ANON comment is more trustworthy than your own words.

> Her apologies don’t mean SHIT because as I’ve pointed out before: they’re not real apologies. There was no notion to make amends, to promise to not do the same thing again, etc. Her apologies are HOLLOW. And, frankly, so are your’s. Especially with your friends commenting below about the “nasty shallies” forcing you to apologize. You didn’t “TECHNICALLY” do something wrong, you ACTUALLY did something wrong & fucking illegal, jackass!

> I don’t give a shit if she or you are minors. That doesn’t fucking excuse your behavior. You both can still be arrested or legally punished for this kind of crap.

> When you say shit like that, that I, some random asshole on the Internet documenting your own freaking words, am WORSE than your abuser…..

that just proves to me that you’ve never actually been abused before.

That you don’t give a shit about real abuse & don’t know what it’s like.

No abuse victim would ever make such a flippant comparison to their trauma like that.

You’re the one who’s sick here, not me.

Disclaimer: This response is entirely the opinion of Lord Pastel Lance & NOT of anyone else. Just me. If you have problems with it, criticize me, not other people.

[deeeelightfuldee]

surveys 062.

What battery percentage is your phone on right now? It’s at 55%

Do any medical afflictions run in your family? Yeppppppppppp

Who did you last talk to and what did you say? i sent a comma to kile. I can’t communicate to him anymore but it’s kind of my way of saying I’m here presently and available to read your messages. it probably annoys him and I should stop. 

What's your favourite Mexican dish? pork tacos from mama marias

Have you ever been to a professional sports game? Yes. many times.

How far do you live from New York City? uhhhhh google says 12.5 hours. not too bad.

How often do you talk to your parents? mom usually every day. dad maybe 2x a year

What was the weather like in your town today? lets google. it was 92 today

Are there any phrases or words that you say a lot? talk to me goose, comin’ in hot, that’s ridiculous, sup homie

How many boyfriends or girlfriends have you ever had? ehgghghg

Have you ever ordered a specially made cake from a cake shop? Yeah, many times.

What was the last movie you saw and who did you watch it with? serendipity 

What's the name of your first real boyfriend or girlfriend? I would say John

Do you clean your ears daily? Not daily, but every couple days.

What accent do you have? midwestern.

What scent of air freshener do you keep in your bathroom? It varies. usually a tree scent of some sort

Have you ever dated a model? No.

What's the best job you've ever had? hmm. babysitting an infant for like 2 hours 3x a week and making like 260 bucks a week.

How about the worst? nannying for a family where the dad was constantly trying to hit on me.

Do you have naturally straight hair? No, pretty curly.

What is your ultimate goal in life? To continuously find beauty in every day 

Have you ever visited someone in prison? nope

What months were you and your siblings born in? july, august, august, january

Do you write down your passwords in a physical place to prevent losing them? ahahhahahaha ummm a few of them. i am often in a “forgot your password?” situation

What are your three favourite vegetables? broccoli, cauliflower, potatoes

How many times a day do you check Facebook or any other social network? its SEVERELY decreased since not being on my phone with kile. looking at my phone usually brings me sadness, because i seldom have any word from him. so I just leave it alone.

When was the last time you had a blocked nose? idk.. 5-6 months ago

Who is your favourite comedian? I am not really sure, I dont follow many comedians

What colour are the socks you're wearing today? havent worn any yet

What did you have for dinner last night? steak

What was the last concert you went to? I want to say relient k

Are you an ugly crier? not really no

What scent is the soap or body wash you use in the shower? I’m on vacation so the scent is like a lavendarish scent which is not my style at all.

Have you ever had sex in/on a vehicle? kind of. -.- not by choice.

Who do you live with? mom & gram

What letter does your street name begin with? numbers

Do you do anything to groom your eyebrows? absolutely I do.

When was the last time you ate at McDonald's? A few weeks ago.

What's your favourite Popsicle flavour? blue

Who was the last person you sent a Facebook message to and what did you say? i havent got a clue. I never go on FB

Do you have any injuries at the moment? yes. one of which is my shoulder and its reallyyyyyyy bugging me

Have you ever been to an ophthalmologist? the eye dr i used to go to was both opthamologist and optometrist so yes

Do you own any animal print clothes? oh probably.

Are you tall, short or average? Would you change this? im tall. I would, maybe it’d be less off-putting to others

When was the last time you went to a drug store/pharmacy? gosh, like a week ago.

Do you ever binge-watch TV shows? just the same ones ive watched for years

Have you ever mustered up the courage to tell someone how you feel only to be rejected? uhhh, no I can’t say I have. 

Do you keep your files and documents organised in one place? somewhat.

What's your favourite sweet treat to bake? my infamous cookies

Are you good at flirting and letting people know you're interested? ill be real honest, I am so slow to fall for someone that it takes some time for me.

What did you have for breakfast today? toast (gf) and eggs

Do you prefer sweet or savoury breakfasts? Sweet

Do you like chick-flicks? heck’n yea

Have you ever taken an acting class? no. not interested

When was the last time you watched one of your favourite movies? yesterday

How often do you use Youtube? seldom. 

What's the coolest thing you've ever dressed up as for Halloween? i dont really do that.

Are you ignoring anyone right now? yeah :( </3

How do you usually style your hair? It’s always up in a messy bun. especially with the heat. but I might chop it off this fall idk.

Do you have any tattoos? Tell me about them. Nope. i wonder if kile will ever get his

Have you ever worked in a store while someone shoplifted there? more times than I could count.

When was the last time you used a stove? tonight with a GF zucchini pizza

Is there anything you absolutely refuse to eat? mushrooms

Are you sitting, standing or laying (or something else) right now? I’m laying on my bed.

How many hours per week do you typically work? --

What was the last pill or tablet you took? probably headache meds or tummy meds on the day of my flight

How far away from your house is the closest grocery store? like 1.4 miles

Have you ever lived in university/college campus housing? Nope.

Who was the last person you complimented? uhhh maybe a sibling

Are you the type of person to take naps, even if you've slept plenty? I WISH

Do you have a crush on anyone at the moment? im trying not to, but im not successful yet

The age old question: dogs or cats? STOP ASKING ME TO MAKE A DECISION ON THIS

When was the last time you saw your best friend? ugh. i don’t think ill ever see him. He sent me a picture today, it was really nice to see his face.

Have you ever been fired from a job? Why? nope.

Are you tired right now? eh, not terribly.

Do you like spring rolls? I do.

What do you live on in terms of a street, road, crescent, place, court etc? street

How many purses or handbags do you own? like 5

Do you get along with all your aunts and uncles? no. some of them I never ever developed relationships with because their parents hated my dad.

Have you ever eavesdropped and heard something you didn't want to hear? Yeah gahhhh i hate that

When was the last time you used a pen, pencil or marker? uhhh yesterday I think

What's your favourite type of curry? None.

Do you often go to do or say something and then just forget? not often

Have you ever had casual sex? Noooooooo. not my thing

What was the last thing you paid for with cash? clothes

What's the last letter of your middle name? h

If your phone rang right now from a number you don't know, would you answer? Nope. I hardly answer for numbers I know

How long is your hair? middle of my back

What was your first pet's name and how did you pick that? Millie. I didn’t have anything to do with that, I was a baby.

Do you drink diet or regular soda? diet. I don’t like the taste of regular.

Have you ever been to Europe? No, but I’d love to go.

Do you worry about your own health? I try not to.

Who did you last make plans with, and what plans did you make? family. 

Can you smell anything right now? Not at the moment, no

How old were you when you got your first cell phone? I was 18 or 19

When was the last time you bought a pair of shoes? ooo boy, its been a minute. I need new shoes, and I also need to get rid of old shoes.

Do you like fruit and vegetable combo juices? not at all. maybe I need to revisit them.

Have you ever been on a spring break trip? Yep yep

Would you rather be warmer or colder right now? colder always.

How tall are your highest heels? I have like 4″ heels but I shouldn’t be wearing them anymore

What's your favourite flavour of frosting? omfg i want frosting so bad. any flavor

When did you wake up today? I fell asleep around 430am and then woke up around 545 my time. 

Do you change your appearance often? I mean, hair color yeah.

What colour are the street signs in your town/suburb? Green

How many people do you work with? --

What was the last thing you ate? piece of chocolate.

Do you have any plans for three hours in the future? either this or sleeping

Has anyone ever made a comment about your weight that offended or upset you? people have definitely made comments about my weight before. just leave me aloneeeeeeeeee.

---- i wish i really was the most important thing on the planet to you. :( maybe then you’d have picked me? </3

[emilyprentisss]

Tagged by: @criminal-anatomy thanks youuu ❤️ (also for anyone that doesn't know, @motherforking-bullshirt is my main)

Rules: Answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people.

Tagging: @baunitchief @spencyfrenchy @shellstrapon @mindy-st-claires @chidi-anagonye @theysaidwecouldbeeverything @wtforkingshirtballs @good-janet honestly anyone who hasn't been tagged

last

1. drink - earl grey tea

2. phone call - work

3. text message - my roommate

4. song you listened to - remember me, coco

5. time you cried - well I just watched the movie coco sooo...

6. dated someone twice - maybe

7. kissed someone and regretted it - yep

8. been cheated on - no

9. lost someone special - yes

10. been depressed - idk

11. gotten drunk and thrown up - no

fave colours

12. Caribbean Blue

13. Indigo

14. Lavender

the last year have you…

15. made new friends - yeah

16. fallen out of love - no

17. laughed until you cried - yep

18. found out someone was talking about you - you betcha

19. met someone who changed you - no

20. found out who your friends are - yes

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list - I think so

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl - all of them

23. do you have any pets - my family has two dogs

24. do you want to change your name - not really

25. what did you do for your last birthday - nada

26. what time did you wake up today - 11:00ish

27. what were you doing at midnight last night - hanging out in a friend’s dorm

28. what is something you can’t wait for - incredibles 2

30. what are you listening to right now - uh pretending to do homework?

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom - yeah

32. something that’s getting on your nerves - schoolwork

33. most visited website - tumblr.com (or ao3)

34. hair colour - dirty blonde

35. long or short hair - medium

36. do you have a crush on someone - I don't think so

37. what do you like about yourself - my persistence... and my eyes.

38. want any piercings? - not really

39. blood type - I actually don't know

40. nicknames - I dont really have any. Ive been called ry before but I usually don't like it

41. relationship status- singe

42. zodiac - capricorn

43. pronouns - she/her

44. fave tv shows - Criminal Minds, SVU, The Good Place, Lucifer, Veep, The Office, Parks and Rec, 30 Rock, DWTS, idk I have so many 

45. tattoos - nope

46. right or left handed - right handed

47. ever had surgery - yes

48. piercings - regular ear piercings (one per ear)

49. sport - soccer I guess but I’ve played ‘em all

50. vacation - Ive been to a lot of places. Most recently, Hawaii, Iceland, and Amsterdam.

51. trainers - no

more general

52. eating - I had a poptart earlier

53. drinking - water

54. i’m about to watch - idk maybe seinfeld or brooklyn 99

55. waiting for - a text

56. want - to be done with school

57. get married - who knows

58. career - right now I babysit but criminal psychology is the dream

which is better

59. hugs or kisses - hugs I guess

60. lips or eyes - eyes

61. shorter or taller - taller

62. older or younger - older

63. nice arms or stomach - stomach?

64. hookup or relationship - ugh idk

65. troublemaker or hesitant - depends

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger - yep

67. drank hard liquor - also yep

68. lost glasses - yessss

69. turned someone down - yeah

70. sex on the first date - no

71. broken someone’s heart - I think so

72. had your heart broken - no

73. been arrested - no

74. cried when someone died - yeah

75. fallen for a friend - maybeeeee

do you believe in

76. yourself - haha sometimes

77. miracles - not really

78. love at first sight - no

79. santa claus - for a long time

80. kiss on a first date - uh yeah

81. angels - idk

other

82. best friend’s name - meghan and sam

83. eye colour - dark blue

84. fave movie - the lion king

85. fave actor - A.J. Cook, Paget Brewster, Kristen Bell, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Chris Pratt, Jennifer Aniston, Leslie Mann, Jennifer Garner, Anna Kendrick and so so many more