#it's very key that zeus is big butthurt about this | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

chucktaylorupset · 3 years ago

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its been a million years. percy has gone from young millenial to squarely gen z. i think that while he’s up on that mountain demanding the gods pay their fucking child support, he should tell hera at the top of his sixteen year old pipsqueak lungs that polyamory is a thing now and she doesn’t have to define her marriage the traditional way if she doesn’t want to. she’s the goddess of all marriages! that includes these modern ones too!!

hera is like zeus would you agree to an open relationship zeus is like SOLD i have been trying to do this for years, completely neglects to read the fine print that this goes two ways before signing on the dotted line for this deal with the prada wearing devil because fundamentally, zeus is an asshole

hera starts hooking up with committed married couples and having SUPREMELY powerful demigod children. they are all her favorites and she lavishes them with powers and gifts and attention. she has, unlike the other gods, no millenia of experience with mortal children to temper her reaction, and so this whole move honestly causes more problems than not.

meanwhile hades and persephone; poeseidon and amphirite; dionysus and ariadne; all of them have been trying to talk to hera about this thing for DECADES and then perseus fucking protagonist powers jackson comes in and turns a quarter of a century into wasted work.

#my post #pjo #it's very key that zeus is big butthurt about this #and that most of the olympians are ethically nonmonogamous thanks to some great work done by either aphrodite or eros #back at the end of the 1900s #being a child of hera is extremely weird because you're not prepared for it like most single parents of demigods are #also most of heras partners come out okay but ALL of them are 'blessed' to never be divorced which uh #can have some variability in terms of results #gods are complicated kids #a lot of hera demigods come up with parents who have very healthy relationships and pass on those emotional intelligence skills!#and then they start coming into their powers and suddenly they inherit a girlboss pta mom who will speak to the manager #and WILL support them taking over the world cause it's what they deserve. if that's what they want <3 #most of them are emotionally healthy enough that they don't even Want to take over the world but uh. they sure are offered that as option #if they want to #hera kids have the Oposite problem of a lot of demigods who have gods practiced in loving mortal kids #they're like i cannot stress how much we Do Not Have To Prove Ourselves to her #we have to be very careful about wanting things she will just handle them to us also #once we get married we can't divorce she would either kill us or it would Be A Thing for the rest of our lives #it's... very stressful to be a child of hera #they mostly try to befriend the chill party kids because they need to catch some Chill

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