#it's not mature or anything hahahha i restrained myself

[peraltasames]

making my life much greener

requested by @fourdrinkamy and anonymous - 27. Kisses exchanged while one person sits on the other’s lap. requested by @b99peraltiago - 3. Drunk/sloppy kisses title from sexual by neiked for obvious reasons

read on ao3

Amy isn’t sure if Jake pulling off her surprise party without a hitch is the result of three years of being with her or an abundance of help from their friends, but she’s completely clueless until they walk into their apartment after dinner at her favourite restaurant and she turns the light on, revealing a flawlessly decorated living room and all of her friends shouting “surprise!”

She’s already two drinks deep from dinner, and Rosa quickly ushers her to the kitchen for a round of tequila shots from the fancy bottle she and Gina got her. Less than twenty minutes pass before Charles is offering her a beer along with some strange squid-based appetizer he prepared, and she happily accepts both by virtue of her exceedingly good mood.

Kylie is talking to her about the new filing tabs she just got at work by the time the fourth drink hits her. Despite the enticing conversation with her best friend, her eyes follow Jake as he exits the bathroom and takes a seat in the armchair next to Terry.

It’s not her fault, really, that her friends have gotten her to this level of intoxication this quickly, or that he’s wearing her favourite shirt on him, or that some combination of her husband’s thoughtfulness all day and how extremely attractive he is is driving her crazy.

“Gotta go,” she mumbles to Kylie, slamming her empty bottle down on the coffee table - without a coaster - in a moment of blind determination to get to her husband as quickly as possible.

Jake makes a small sound of surprise as she stops at his chair and drops herself gracelessly onto his lap, winding her arms around his neck.

“Uh oh,” Gina mutters from the couch, sipping her cocktail and settling in to watch with amusement. “The return of four-drink Amy.”

Jake rolls his eyes and winds an arm around Amy’s waist, rubbing her back in comforting circles. “You okay, babe?”

The world is a little blurry, but she can make out his creased forehead and concerned gaze.

“More than okay,” she smirks. “I think it’s time for my birthday present.”

“But I already-“

Amy does her best to raise her eyebrows in a suggestive manner, her hand leaving his shoulder to stroke the inside of his thigh.

“Oh.” Jake’s cheeks redden, which only makes him markedly more adorable, and he gently takes her hand off his leg and holds it in his own. “Babe. We have a ton of people over and it’s only, like, nine-thirty.”

“I don’t care.”

“Ames, we can’t just disappear to our bedroom at the same-”

His voice is her favourite sound in the world, but she’s officially reached the limit for how long she can watch his lips move without feeling them on her own. She leans in and smashes their lips together, her mouth already open and ready for a full-on make out that Jake is considerably less prepared for.

He doesn’t pull away, though, so she takes advantage of the opportunity to slide her tongue into his mouth and run her fingers through his slightly grown-out curls. She’s only human, so it’s quite understandable, in her opinion, that she lets out a small moan as Jake deepens the kiss, resulting in a chorus of complaints from the rest of the room.

“I know it’s Amy’s birthday and you two are still in the honeymoon phase like three months after your wedding, but c’mon, guys,” Terry groans. “At least try to keep it a little PG.”

“Sorry, guys,” Jake apologizes sincerely to everyone except a grinning Charles and his horny wife, who is still making an attempt to continue kissing him. His hands guide her waist off of his lap to sit next to him in the chair instead.

“I’m not sorry,” she whispers, her lips ghosting over his earlobe. “You are so…so hot.”

Jake laughs softly, and she can tell by the way he’s awkwardly shifting around that he’s having a hard time being the voice of reason. “You’re hot too, babe.”

“You know,” Charles cuts in, nudging Terry over to sit closer to the couple. “If you guys conceive a child tonight, it’ll be a Gemini. Just like me and Jake!”

It’s just enough to kill the mood, even in Amy’s state of inebriation. They’ve only been married for three months, she needs a little more time to enjoy her husband before they think about kids (preferably without Charles’ involvement).

She retreats to the kitchen to get another drink and continue socializing with their party guests, but ends up back on Jake’s lap about two hours later and remains there until the last of their friends has left and she’s all but fallen asleep on his shoulder.

“You wanna go to bed, honey?” Jake asks softly, his hand stroking her hair as it has been since she sat down.

Amy, completely exhausted and no longer feeling an intense desire to rip her husband’s clothes off, nods against his chest and holds onto his shirt as he gets to his feet and shuffles off to their bedroom with her in his arms.

The last memory she has of the night is her head hitting the soft pillows, but she wakes the next morning with her pajamas on, her makeup taken off and a glass of water and Advil by the bed.

There’s a sticky note on the glass, which Amy puts her glasses on to read:

went to pick up stuff for breakfast in bed before we have dessert ;)

She sinks back into the bed and sighs with contentment and absolute certainty that she’s the luckiest woman alive.