#it's not bad funky necessarily it just significantly changes how the characters Are
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karmaphone · 10 months ago
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there's somethin tickling my brain funky about how they keep attributing different character actions + lines to others
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waitimcomingtoo · 4 years ago
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Dummy
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Synopsis: Peter is the only one of the Avengers who doesn’t tease you for being a little slow 
Masterlist
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Now you weren’t exactly dumb.
You were just a little slow.
When you joined the Avengers last year, the team learned pretty quickly that your mind moved at a different pace than everyone else. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing and it didn’t keep you from doing your job, it just meant you were the butt of most of the jokes. Every time one of your blunders happened, your intelligence would be mocked in some way. You knew it was all in good fun, but it hurt to it feelings every now and then. The only person who never poked fun at you was Peter. And for that reason, he was your favorite on the team.
“How are there 23 minutes left in this movie and I still don’t know any of the characters names?” Steve wondered as you all sat in the couch in Stark Towers, watching a movie on a particularly rainy afternoon.
“I think the main kids name is Phoenix. That’s all I got though.” Sam shook his head, just as confused as Steve.
“The dogs name is Benson.” Bucky mumbled quietly.
“Who names their kid Phoenix?” Peter wondered out loud as he shoveled popcorn into his mouth. The two of you were tucked into the corner of the couch, sharing a blanket and bowl of popcorn. You looked at him like he was crazy when you heard his question.
“Ummm, Joaquin Phoenix’s parents.” You scoffed and rolled your eyes. You turned your attention back to the movie as a silence settled in the room. You felt everyone’s eyes on you after a minute and looked around to see everyone staring at you with a dumbfounded expression.
“What?” You asked shyly, shrinking down a little in your seat in discomfort.
“That’s his last name.” Sam stated, chuckling a little under his breath. You realized your mistake and felt your face heat up.
“Oh.” You mumbled, your voice getting drowned out as the rest of the Avengers laughed at your expense.
“Did she really just say that?” Nat looked at the group with a playful smile. Everyone, excluding Peter, nodded as their laughter died down.
“Oh my God.” Steve chuckled. “That’s so stupid.”
There was that word again.
He didn’t mean it maliciously. Steve was the kinda of guy who ushered spiders into a magazine so he could let them outside. And yet, it still stung when he said that word.
Stupid.
You smiled sheepishly and tried to focus on the movie, snuggling closer to Peters side until it ended. You were fully aware that he was the only one who didn’t laugh, and you loved him that.
And maybe you loved him for a few other reasons too.
~
“Alright. Who has money for the subway?” Sam asked the group as he patted his empty pockets. You were on another late night trip to get cookies from a specific shop in Times Square, leaving without Tony’s knowledge. Everyones hands went to their pockets and collectively made a face.
“Not me.” Rhodey shrugged.
“I don’t have any.” Bruce added.
“I don’t even have pockets.” Nat realized.
“I have gum.” Peter proudly produced a silver wrapper from his pocket. “Oh wait, it’s just a wrapper.”
“You’re telling me we’re earth’s mightiest heroes and we’re broke?” Sam shook his head is disdain.
“I gave my last dollar to a guy in the subway for playing music.” Peter defended himself.
“What was he playing?” You asked him as you tiredly leaned against his arm.
“A mandolin.” Peter answered, making your face scrunch up.
“That’s a language.” You laughed at him slightly, feeling empowered by having the upper hand. Everyone looked at you and a few of them snorted.
“Mandarin is a language.” Bruce said gently, not wanting to embarrass you further. “Not mandolin.” 
“What?” You blinked in confusion and looked to Peter for answers.
“A mandolin is an instrument, dummy.” Sam chortled. You smiled tightly as the group laughed at your mistake, looking down to hide your blush.
“Oh. Sorry. My bad.” You laughed shyly as you tucked your hair behind your ear and pretending to read a nearby sign.
“That’s okay.” Peter spoke up in your defense. “They sound really similar. Plus like, French, French Horn. Who knows what’s going on?”
“Yeah.” Bucky said softly. “Or like, bra’s aren’t pointy anymore.”
Bruce nodded like it made perfect sense and Sam just shook his head as he texted.
“What?” You whispered to Peter, not knowing what he meant.
“He’s from the 1920s. He’s still adjusting.” Peter whispered to you out of the corner of his mouth before looking at Bucky. “That’s the spirit. Kind of.”
“FRIDAY is sending a car.” Sam informed the group. “This is never happening again. The cookies aren’t that good.”
“They’re pretty good.” Rhodey shrugged, but wanting the late Nate tradition to end. Sam looked at him for a moment before breaking into a smile.
“Hell yeah they are. Let’s do this again tomorrow.”
~
Bruce found you in the lab the next day with a pin between your teeth and a pencil behind your ear. Papers with drawings of suits were scattered around the table as you measured a piece of black fabric.
“What are you doing?” Bruce wondered as he took a seat across from you. You glanced up at him before marking a dot on the fabric.
“Mr. Stark asked me to help him with the new suits. I’m trying to make a fabric template for Nat’s gloves.” You told him as you smoothed the fabric out.
“Is it hard?” He asked, watching you intently as you worked.
“Not really.” You shrugged and took a step back to examine your work. “Okay. How many holes do we need? 1,2,3,4,5.” You counted your fingers. “Okay. Five holes.”
You sat back down and put five dots where her fingers would be to mark where you had to cut. You heard a slight chuckle from Bruce and looked up at him curiously.
“Did you just count your fingers?” He asked slowly, wanting to make sure he saw what he thought he had. “To know how many fingers Nat has?”
Your face burned when you realized how dumb you looked, in front of a scientific genius no less.
“Oh, Uh, yeah.” You stammered, feeling very insecure with him watching you now. You moved slower than before and second guessed moves you’d already made a hundred times. Bruce sensed your discomfort and got out of his seat, tapping the table twice as he thought.
“Have you ever heard the expression “the lights are on but nobody’s home’?” He asked you and you were grateful he changed the subject.
“Yeah, I think I have.” You smiled, proud of yourself for knowing something.
“It reminds me of you.” Bruce said so politely that you didn’t realize it was an insult at first. He left the lab to find Tony, leaving you feeling embarrassed and a little hurt. Everyone knew Bruce could hurt you ten times worse with his words than the Hulk could with his fists, you’d just never been his target before. You slumped down in your seat and continued making the gloves, your mood significantly dampened from before he came in the room.
~
You walked into the kitchen the next morning, sleepily rubbing your eyes. You pressed a chaste kiss on Peters shoulder as you passed him, also more affectionate to your best friend when you were half asleep. You smiled at Rhodey, who was seated at the bar and skimming through a newspaper.
“Did you eat yet?” You asked him through a yawn as you got out yogurt and fruit for yourself.
“No. I needed my coffee first.” He smiled sleepily at you and held up his mug.
“Oh, you mean your sugar with a spoonful of coffee?” You teased him. “Yeah, it’s good you got that out of the way.”
“I prefer it this way. The sugar wakes me up.” Peter defended his drink as he took a sip.
“That’s what the caffeine is supposed to do, mi amor.” You laughed as you ruffled his bed head ridden hair. He was about to make a comeback when his stomach rumbles loudly.
“Someone’s hungry.” You remarked. “Do you want eggs?”
“No thanks.” Peter shook his head. “I can’t eat eggs alone.”
“Well I’m here. And Rhodey’s right there, so you’re not alone.” You told him. “And I can grab Steve and Bucky. They’re just in the other room.”
Rhodey looked up from his newspaper with raised eyebrows and looked at Peter. Peter set his mug down and made a face at Rhodey that told him not to say anything. You looked between the two of them in confusion as you wondered what was going on.
“I meant alone as in without toast, sweetness.” Peter said gently, not wanting you to feel dumb for misunderstanding. “But I am glad you’re here.”
“Oh.” You faked a smile and shrugged like it was no big deal. Peter had handled the situation with ease and you didn’t feel as embarrassed as you normally would. That is until…
“You know, Y/n, it’s a good thing you’re pretty.” Rhodey nodded before going back to his newspaper. You froze with your spoonful of yogurt midway to your mouth and looked at him. He didn’t actually call you dumb, but it was implied. You looked at Peter to see if he was thinking the same thing, but his face had nothing but kindness on it.
“You are pretty.” He agreed with Rhodey. “But you’re a lot of other things too.”
You cracked a smile and rubbed his back for a moment in appreciation.
“Thanks Peter.” You said softly and went back to your breakfast. Not wanting to worry him, you ignored the way Rhodey’s comment made you feel and tried to push it from your mind. But no hard you tried to focus on other things, you had one thought prodding at the back of your head.
You were dumb.
~
A week went by without anyone poking fun at your intelligence. You had a sneaking suspicion Peter had something to do with the lack of comments, but you said nothing. It was nice to have a break from all the teasing and it made hanging out with the team more enjoyable. You all lingered around the kitchen one day, eating all different kinds of lunch when Tony came in the room.
“Eat up, funky bunch.” He clapped his hands. “We have a mission in Alaska to train for and I need all hands on deck. Cap, do you think you can teach Peter that spinny thingy you do?”
“I can try.” Steve looked at Peter and nodded.
“Great. I’m getting a manicure. I’ll be back around noon.” Tony informed you all.
“Wait, I thought you said all hands on deck.” You tilted your head at him.
“I did. Which I why I have to make sure my hands look the best.” Tony waved flirtatiously, wiggling his fingers around like a teenage girl. He smirked as his action was met with some eye rolls and a few chuckles before leaving the room.
“I can’t believe we’re going to Alaska.” Peter nudged you excitedly and you smiled with glee.
“Is Alaska the same as the North Pole? Or am I thinking of Antarctica?” Sam wondered out loud.
“No. The North Pole is all the way at the top. Alaska is below California. Like by Texas.” You said confidently, proud that you knew information that someone else didn’t. Your pride quickly dissipated when you saw the teams faces twist in amusement.
“Wait a minute.” Steve looked at you like you were joking. You shrugged, letting him know you weren’t. Sam burst out laughing and clapped his hands as the rest of the team began to laugh.
“Absolutely not.” Sam grinned as he wiped a tear from his eye.
“Yes it is.” You insisted. “Look at any US map. It’s on the bottom by Hawaii.”
You were getting angry now. You knew you were right this time and they were still teasing you.
“No.” Bucky shook his head is dismissal. “No.”
“Alaska is below California on every map I’ve ever seen. You’re telling me I’m wrong?” You our your hand on your hip and stared at them.
“100%. I am 100% telling you you’re wrong.” Sam said between his laughter. Peter came to your side and showed you a picture of a map on his phone.
“Alaska is US territory but it’s not connected to the rest of the states. They just put it below California on maps to show it’s a part of the US. Thats not actually where it’s located.” He said quietly. You looked at the map for a few seconds before you realized he was right. And if he was right…
You were wrong.
“Oh.” You smiled apologetically and averted your eyes. “Oops.”
You turned around and pretending to clean up the kitchen to hide your searing blush. Your fingers clenched around your sponge when you heard the teasing laughter from behind you.
“Sometimes I wonder how you made it out of high school.” Steve joked as he threw out the crusts of his sandwich. The comment stung you and you began to scrub the counter faster so you could leave the room sooner. Peter could see your shoulders tense and put a reassuring hand on your back. You gave him a tight lipped smiled before putting your dish in the sink.
“I’m still wondering how she made it out of first grade.” Nat teased you and she poked your side.
“I can’t believe she made it out of the womb in the first place with nobody telling her where to go.” Sam said, making everyone laugh loudly. You abruptly threw a dish in the sink, making everyone go silent. You tuned around slowly and faked a smile.
“Haha. Yeah.” You forced a laugh. “I’ll catch you guys later.”
You swiftly left the room before anyone could catch your tears. You felt stupid for even getting upset over it, but their words hurt. Feeling like you were always the dumbest person in the room was taking a toll on you, especially when you weren’t the only one who felt that way. Peter watched you leave with sympathetic eyes, feeling his own frustration bubble at the sound of the team laughing at you. He thought they had listened the first time he told them to stop making fun of you, but they clearly hadn’t. After seeing the pained look on your face, Peter made a decision.
It was never going to happen again.
~
“Ugh. I’m never gonna get this right.” Peter groaned as he messed up the move Steve was trying to teach him once again.
“You’re getting too much inside your head. Just let it happen naturally.” Steve instructed as he resumed his stance. Peter tried the move again, wiping out and landing on his side with a thud. You watched him out of the corner of your eye as you spared with Nat.
“I can’t.” Peter got up and rubbed his arm. “I can’t do it.”
Steve nodded, like he was accepting Peters defeat. You stopped sparing and looked at Peter.
“Yes you can. Come on, Peter.” You encouraged him. “Everyone told Van Gogh that he couldn’t be an artist because he only had one ear but he did it anyway.”
The room feel silent, as it often did when you spoke, and everyone looked down.
“Oh dear Lord.” Rhodey sighed and hung his head and he snickered. You could see everyone else fighting back laughter or cracking a smile, yet saying nothing.
“What?” You crossed your arms in annoyance, looming to Peter for help.
“He chopped his ear off after becoming an artist.” Peter said kindly. “He wasn’t born without one.”
You opened your mouth to speak, but Tony beat you to it.
“Speaking of ears, do you think of you shone a light in one of Y/n’s ears, it would come out the other ear?” Tony quipped, making everyone laugh. The tips of your ears burned as that feeling of stupidity sunk in again. You undid the Velcro on your boxing gloves and pretended to wipe sweat from your face as you rushed to the bin where the gloves went. You kept your back to the group and pretending to be putting your gloves away when you were really concealing your pained expression.
“Yes.” Nat jeered. “Yes I do.”
Your shoulders slumped with exhaustion as you turned around, making every effort to keep your face neutral. Your face didn’t give away any signs of sadness, but your knuckles turning white from how hard you were gripping the bin gave your true feelings away. Peter noticed this and felt his jaw clench. If you weren’t gonna tell them to stop, he was.
“Leave her alone, guys.” He commanded the crowd before looking at you. “Thanks for the encouragement, Y/n. I’m gonna keep trying.”
“It’s fine.” You nodded curtly. “I’m gonna hit the showers. I’ll see you guys at dinner.”
You walked out of the gym, pausing in place when you heard Sams voice.
“Hit the showers?” He laughed. “We just started.”
“Shhh. Don’t confuse the poor girl any further.” Bruce joked back. You looked back at the gym with your eyebrows knit together, taking a quiet step closer to hear what they were saying about you without you there.
“She’s probably like, ‘whats this magic closet that makes rain?’” Rhodey imitated your voice, making you sound as dense as possible.
“Knock it off guys. It’s not funny.” Peter snapped, but the teasing continued.
“Or like, ‘this shampoo says it adds volume, but I used it and I can’t hear any louder than before’.” Tony mocked you, skipping around a little like a child. Your face contorted in misery as they made fun of you. You knew who they really were, and they were good people. They didn’t intend to hurt your feelings, they were only joking around like they did with everyone. Steve was teased all the time for his old fashioned dialect and no one lets Tony live down the kimono incident. Still, all their insults and mockery cut you like a knife.
“Ahh, I love that girl.” Nat shook her head with a smile. “She’s so dumb.”
“She may be slow, but she’s entertaining as hell.” Sam nodded in agreement.
“I said knock it off.” Peter repeated, getting a reaction this time.
“Aw. Peters mad because we’re teasing his girlfriend.” Nat pouted and pinched Peters cheek. She quickly realized how wholesome she was being and punched Bucky in the face to maintain her lethal assassin persona.
“She’s not my girlfriend.” Peter grumbled. Now that you were out of the room, he was the next target.
“He’s right. Hey, maybe that’s why you guys haven’t gotten together yet.” Rhodey shrugged. “She’s too stupid to realize you’re in love with her.”
That was all you had to hear. You ran towards your with tears running down your face. Thanks to Peters advanced heating, he heard every heavy footstep.
“Okay. Maybe she is a little slow.” Peter shook his head in disdain at the team. “But you guys are idiots.”
~
You were quiet the entire way to Alaska, keeping to yourself and silently looking out the window. Peter attempted to talk to you once or twice, but he could tell you wanted to be alone. The Avengers completed the mission within a few hours with minor damage to the area. Peter focused on his job but found himself looking for you every now and then, being as you usually stayed together during missions. He didn’t see you anywhere and assumed you were doing your own thing on the other side of the field. He heart rest assured when he saw you boarding the jet, still looking reserved and aloof from the rest of the team. You took a seat by the window and rested your chin on your hand, looking out at the bleak landscape in front of you as the jet took off. Peter didn’t engage in small talk with the rest of the team and wistfully stared at you instead, silently willing you to cheer up.
“I think that went pretty well.” Rhodey nodded and the team agreed. “But where were you the whole time, Y/n? Picking daisies?”
Peter held his breath as you slowly turned around. You gave Rhodey a frigid smile and shook your head.
“We came during a blizzard so I used my powers to create a heated force field around the area we were in to prevent frostbite and give you guys and easier time seeing in the snow. We were also at a higher altitude than any of us are used to so I kept the air pressure to sea level standard.” You said simply. “And I assumed there would be smoke from the battle so I rounded up the nearby animals and made a separate for field around them to protect their lungs.”
The room went silent, something you were used to at this point. But instead of everyone falling silent because they were laughing at you, they were impressed.
“Oh.” Rhodey blinked in surprise, not expecting the answer he was given.
“I also picked this flower.” You smiled proudly as you produced a Forget Me Not from your lap. Peter couldn’t keep the grin from breaking through on his face. You were the center of attention once again, but in a good way this time. Everyone was pleasantly surprised with what you had done and it showed.
“I didn’t think about the altitude.” Nat realized.
“I had no idea there was a blizzard.” Steve added, looking dumbfounded.
“Because I kept you from knowing.” You shrugged. “I wanted you guys to focus on the mission.”
“I mean, I knew. I just didn’t tell you guys because I was so distracted by my buffed and polished nails.” Tony twiddled his fingers again, showing off his freshly manicured nails. You all laughed, breaking the tension in the jet.
“Well look at that.” Sam looked impressed. “Y/n knew something we didn’t.”
It was almost a compliment, but it still made you feel insecure. You didn’t want it to be this mind boggling every time you did something useful.
“Thanks, Y/n. That was really smart.” Peter said softly as he patted your knee. You put your hand over his and squeezed it. It was the first time someone called your smart, and it made you feel good.
“It was really smart.” Sam said skeptically. He stared at you for a moment before poking your side.
“What are you doing?” You swatted his hand away.
“Just making sure you’re still in there.” He eyed you suspiciously. Peter could sense the attention was making you uncomfortable and changed the subject.
“Are we almost home?” He asked Tony before peering out the window. The flight was a little over 7 hours on a normal plane, but the Stark jet was much quicker. The flight would only take a few hours, but Peter was not known for being patient.
“Yes, Peter. We are almost back at the tower. You can get your diaper changed and your bottle as soon as we get back.” Tony sassed him, making him shrink in his seat. Your body language had completely changed and your were now sitting straight, facing the group. Peter was glad you were feeling better and didn’t even mind Tony’s comment.
“Guys, let’s be civil. We’re all tired. We all want to get home.” You said calmly. “Let’s just focus on how pretty the sky looks tonight. Isn’t is pretty, Peter?”
He gazed at your profile as you looked out the window at the stars, admiring how pretty you looked from the side.
“Yeah. It’s beautiful.” He conceded without ever taking his eyes off you. You shot him a smile before looking straight ahead at the dashboard.
“Wow, the moon is huge!” You pointed time a large yellow crescent that could be seen through the window.
“That’s literally the reflection of my banana on the windshield.” Tony deadpanned. He may have been right, but it still looked pretty.
“Should we make a wish?” You asked Peter, ignoring Tony’s comment.
“On the banana?” He asked.
“Yes.” You nodded. “On the banana.”
“Why?” Rhodey asked. “It’s not like people wish on the moon.”
“It feels like we should.” You said with confidence.
“Yep. She’s still in there.” Sam chuckled. And just like that, your confidence receded.
“I hate it here.” Bucky sighed heavily and tuned out of the conversation.
“It must be so peaceful being you, Y/n.” Tony remarked.
“Why do you say that?” You wondered.
“Because instead of thinking about your problems and mistrials, you simply don’t think at all.” Tony said suavely. In only a better for minutes, you’d gone from being the hero to the laughing stock of the group. The sly comments and taunting laughter made you feel like you should stop opening your mouth entirely. You faked a smile and turned back towards the window, tuning out the rest of the way home. Peter chewed his lip as he stared at you, feeling useless to helping you out. The team just wouldn’t let up, no matter how many times he told them to stop. Knowing you weren’t in the mood to talk, he scooted closer to you and put a comforting hand on your back. You smiled warmly at him and rested your head on his shoulder, listening to him point out the constellations the whole way home.
~
The next day, you and Peter were sitting in the balcony, working on some new gadgets for Mr. Stark when Peter made a startling discovery.
“Where’s my right web shooter?” Peter stood up in a panic when he realized it was missing. “I left it right here.”
“Maybe a bird carried it off.” You shrugged as you twisted a tiny screw into Peters left web shooter.
“I’m being serious, Y/n.” Peter stated. “Mr. Stark is going to kill me and turn me into a decorative rug if I lost it.”
“I’m being serious too. We live in New York and I see birds around here all the time.” You told him as you continued your work. “And you know the pigeons here are feral. A bird probably stole it to pay for his child support.”
Peter usually entertained your antics and joined in with his own batch of sarcasm, but he wasn’t in the mood. His web shooter was missing and their were actual stakes involved. Without his web shooter, he couldn’t be Spiderman. And without Spider-Man, he couldn’t be an Avenger.
“Can you be serious for once?“ Peter whined, picking up everything on the table to look under it.
“I’m just saying it’s possible, Peter. You never know.” You insisted as you put your screw driver down to help him look. You began looking in the flower pots on the windowsill that you and Peter had planted. Peter stopped his search for a moment, growing angry with you for wasting time. He didn’t know if you were joking around or genuine believed his web shooter was in the flower pots, but it made him frustrated nonetheless. A combination of his lack of sleep and stress over losing the webshooter manifested into a moment of unchecked rage.
“No, it’s not possible.” He snapped. “A bird didn’t steal my web shooter. God, do you have to be so stupid?” 
 The word hung in the air for a moment, settling in to the both of you. Peters eyes immediately softened, feeling instant regret for what he had said. You stopped trifling through the plants and slowly turned around.
“What?” You asked quietly. Peter tightened his lips into a line and tried to justify what he had said.
“I try to defend you but you make it so hard. Can you help me out a little here and not be so…” He trailed off when he realized he had only made it worse. Your face hardened and you looked disappointed in Peter, which killed him. He would have preferred anger or even sadness, but the disappointment killed him.
“So what?” You shrugged. “Finish your sentence Peter.”
“I didn’t mean that.”
“No, really, go ahead.” You stated coldly. “You got this far. So what, Peter?”
He looked at you for a moment, getting that feeling of wishing you could turn back time just a few seconds to fix a mistake.
“So dumb all the time.” He finished his sentence with an unsteady voice. Your face scrunched up in a pained expression as you sucked in and let out a shaky breath.
“You were the only one who never called me that.” You whimpered before moving past him and going inside. Peter watched you through the open balcony doors as you disappeared into the hallway with a heavy heart. His mouth was open to apologize, but you were long gone. He’d seen you being ridiculed so many times already, and now he was the one doing it. All that talk about it never happening again, only for him to be the reason it happened. Peter couldn’t live with himself for another minute without you knowing how sorry he was. He took a step towards the doorway until he heard a pigeon land on the table. He watched it curiously for a moment as it pecked at the screwdriver you had been using before picking it up with its beak. It flew over to the edge and began to walk along the railing, still keeping the screwdriver in his mouth. Peter followed the pigeon, walking all the way down the balcony to find a large nest in the corner. He watched as it dropped the screwdriver into its nest, right next to his web shooter.
“Holy shit. A bird stole my web shooter.” Peter said in disbelief. Peter watched as baby pigeons poked out from inside the web shooter to greet the other pigeon.
“Holy shit. A bird stole my web shooter for his kids.” Peters eyes widened even more than they already were. Realized struck him and his shoulders slumped.
“She was right.” He mumbled, angry at himself more than ever. “I yelled at her and she was right.”
Peter wasted no time in rescuing his web shooter from the birds, offering them a nice biodegradable coffee cup in its place, and ran to the kitchen to make you a peace offering. He knocked softly on your door and didn’t wait for an answer before going in.
“I made you this cup of tea as an apology.” Peter stiffly held out a mug with an awkward smile on his face. You looked at Peter from your bed, eyes puffy like you had been crying. You stared at each other for a long time, you with a death glare and Peter with his awkward smile. Neither of you said a word as Peter continued to hold out the mug. After two full minute of silence, a bead of sweat ran down Peters face as he looked around nervously, never breaking his smile. You let out an angry sigh and decided to throw him a bone, crossing the room to accept his mug. You looked into the cup for a moment before looking back at Peter.
“This is empty.” You deadpanned.
“I don’t know how to make tea.” Peter whispered, never breaking eye contact.
“I’ve seen you make it.” You snapped.
“I forgot how to do it.” Peters eyes shifted nervously to the side.
“Bucky was in the kitchen, wasn’t he?”
“I know he hates me.” Peter talked over you as you groaned. “I know he does.”
“Just go away.” You tried to close the door but he kept it open.
“No.” Peter said firmly. “I came in here to apologize.”
“You see this?” You held up the mug for a Peter to see. “It’s my cup of care. And look at that” ,you dumped the cup over, “it’s empty.”
Peter stared at your demonstration with raised eyebrows, surprised that you were still able to be sarcastic when he hurt you. Peter took the mug from your hands and set it on the ground before slowly looking up at your face.
“You’re not stupid.” He said softly with all the sincerity his heart could give. You scoffed and folded your arms, looking to the side when you felt tears sting your eyes.
“Yes I am.” You said like you fully believed it, which was Peters worse fear. “Everyone says so. Even you.”
It hit Peter like a sheet of glass when you looked at him like that.
Like he was someone you didn’t want around.
“I didn’t mean to say that.” Peter apologized. “That is not how I feel. At all.”
“Don’t act like you’ve never thought about saying that before.” You laughed sadly. “Everyone on the team calls me dumb. It was only a matter of time before you did it too.”
“I didn’t mean it.” Peter repeated. “I don’t think you’re stupid.”
“Bullshit.” You snapped. “You’re so full of bullshit.”
“I’m not full of bullshit.” He whined like a child and gave you puppy dog eyes. “I’m full of regret.”
You chewed the inside of your cheek as he gave you his best pout, willing you to forgive him. Finally, you caved and cracked a smile.
“I hate you.” You stamped your foot and hung your head, frustrated with yourself for not being able to stay mad at him. Peter opened his arms and you walked into them, arms still folded angrily. You bumped your forehead against his shoulder before moving to rest your chin on it as he wrapped his arms around you. Peter nestled against your hair and sighed, happy that you had forgiven him but still saddened that he had hurt you in the first place. He could see the pile of used tissues on your bed and it killed him to know he made you cry.
“I didn’t mean to call you that. I really didn’t.” He said softly. “I’m the one who’s been trying to stop people from saying that.”
“But they still do it.” You sniffled. “Everyday I get called dumb or stupid or scalene.”
“I think it’s obtuse, not scalene.” Peter reluctantly corrected you. You pulled away and little and let Peter wipe the tears from your face.
“Maybe they’re right.” You shrugged and looked Peter in the eyes. “Maybe I am dumb.”
Peter kept your face between his hands, staring at you for a moment before sighing.
“I once sneezed so many times in a row that I peed my pants.” Peter deadpanned. “I was 17.”
“What?” You chuckled as you wiped your nose.
“I saw Bucky try to take a piece of toast out of the toaster with his metal arm and electrocute himself.” He continued. “And I constantly see Tony bumping into glass doors.”
“I don’t understand.” You squinted your eyes, but sure what point he was trying to make.
“Steve still picks up the phone and asks for the operator. Nat leaves her curling iron plugged in all the time. I do not think Sam knows the address of where we live and I’m pretty sure Rhodey can’t do laundry. He gets all his stuff dry cleaned, even his socks.”
“Why are you telling me all of this?” You asked.
“Because were all dumb.” Peter concluded. “We all do and say dumb things. You don’t know where Alaska is and no one in this tower can read analog clocks. If we’re all dumb, then maybe none of us are dumb. Or we all are. Who cares?” Peter shrugged, making you laugh. “And you were right. A bird did carry off my web shooter. So no, you’re no dumb. Or stupid. Or obtuse. You’re, uh, you- you…” Peter looked down at he fumbled over his words.
“I’m what?” You raised an eyebrow. You could finish his sentence last time, but this time you were lost.
“You’re…” Peter tampered off again, staring at your confused expression for a moment before pulling you into a kiss. Your hands clenched into a fist and slowly uncurled as you relaxed into the kiss. Peter pulled away too soon and let his eyes flutter open. They met yours and you shared a moment of hesitation, not knowing what happened rest next.
“I’m gonna be honest lovey, I didn’t really have an ending to that sentence.” Peter chris joes softly, his breath fanning your face. “That was mainly improv.”
“You’re pretty good at improv, Parker.” You cracked a smile and wrapped your arms around his neck.
“I did a little bit of theater in high school.” He shrugged smugly, making you giggle.
“Mmm. I severely don’t want to hear about that.” You teased before kissing him again.
“Oh, I think you do.” Peter remarked. “Because I once went to the bathroom during intermission with my mic still on and the entire audience heard me peeing.”
“Oh my God.” You laughed. “You’re so stupid.”
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