#it's just under $30 normally which is already pretty decent. but i can't imagine it NEVER going on sale.

[demo-ness]

btw i beat Another Crab's Treasure tonight*, and got the few remaining achievements i was missing (mostly just buying shells and activating Gun(TM), but apparently i had missed an optional boss in the grove too)

it's extremely good. it's a game about growing up in a world where nothing is fair, and the desperate struggle and rage that builds from that. maybe you can't fix the big stuff, but it's still worth helping where you can, rather than closing yourself off from the world. sometimes things don't work out, and people get hurt, but even at your most hopeless you need to keep pushing.

that's contrasted by the tone, which is usually tongue-in-cheek and/or straight up goofy, even in easy to miss background details. (some personal favorites: the CND Pharmacy receipt walkways with the subheading "CNDeez nuts gottem", the Gain dish soap parody called Loss with the decorative leaf graphics on it forming loss.jpg, and how Elden Bay seasoning has 62% daily value for sodium for only 1/4 tsp servings)

it's also arguably the best entry-level soulslike out there. i've only played 2 others, but ACT was far easier, and that was at the default hard difficulty. i didn't really mess with them outside of the gun achievement, but there's an entire section in the settings menu dedicated to fine tuning the difficulty down into whatever you need. or, again, you can take a gun that 1-shots everything, including the final boss' phases. it's funny EVERY time and the feature should be in more games.

also, Kril is just damn cute, and you can put an LGBT+ flag on him. 11/10 game.

[tenrose]

Sunday brainstorm: one week before I'm officially in holidays yaaaaay

Anyway I'm leaving for one week the wednesday after. But in the meantime I have to clean my apartment because there is the pet sitter who will come for my cat. I won't be able to completely clean the whole thing but at least it has to look decent.

Then the remaining last days will be for properly deep clean and reorganize my whole apartment. I absolutely cannot do see alone. Fortunately I have been opening up about this with someone close from my family who will help me. Like it's been a struggle and a massive cause of anxiety, depression and guilt all at once. But I think I'm ready to start over and finally take care of this matter not only now but keep it clean on a regular basis. She thinks too because I am the one who decided to talk to her about it which I've never done before. So I think I'm making progress.

There's like so many things wrong with me and I definitely can't solve everything at once. But I have an idea of what I could focus myself on after that. Anyway one thing at a time. I now understand that I can't wake up, think I'm gonna fix my whole life in a weekend, realize it's too much, do nothing. And re do the same thing the next weekend. Like it's a hard thing to accept, although it's supposed to be obvious but hey my brain is stupid.

So for now I will be focusing on the slightly more deep cleaning than usual for the pet sitter, so I can already move forward a few things. And also enjoy my week of vacations more freely knowing I will be supported after that. And also even if I have left the school system for a while now, I feel like September is still made to start anew.

I can't wait to finally be in a apartment I actually like and feel like I'm allowed to impregnate on and decorate. I have been here for three years and I don't feel like home. I mean, I genuinely love the place it is, I like how it is city but not big, I'm close to every accomodation, I can walk to local stores, to work, and have public transports for the big city, groceries, airport, train stations etc. I think I have just been upset to go from a bigger apartment when I was with a roommate to a studio. Like I absolutely think everyone who work but is alone should be allowed to rent a fucking two rooms apartment. That's why my next plan is to destroy capitalism and fuck up landlords and the whole society who is built around the concept of couple. But anyway it is what it is. I will probably never be able to afford buying just a two room apartment, or to buy anything at all. So I have to accept to like what I get. The apartment is honestly not that bad for a one room one. It's well thought so with a bit of decorative imagination (which I don't have cause I've never decorated anything, now that I think about it did I even accepted any place I lived in like a home since I left my parents? I think no), it can be very nice. Just to have to keep in mind that I live with an agent of chaos lmao.

Anyway I don't know where I'm going with this.

One thing that's gonna be an absolute needed piece will be a big board so I can make list of everything. Sunday is gonna be for list. It already is for groceries and meals. Like my therapist taught me to do this, and not only do I plan all my meals in advance, and so I eat more diversified food, but also it's a gain of money (which we all need). I also have my alarms, to stop playing, don't forget my Pill (another new improvement, I hope too soon to tell) and honestly it works pretty well. The only thing I'm gonna have to learn is to not freak out and forget about a task forever if I have something else happening the day I'm supposed to do the thing on my list. That is gonna be the biggest challenge tbh.

Anywayyyyyyy... Yeah all these things are supposed to be normal and being over 30 you'd think I would have all my life under control but nah. And I'm not the only one. You know, the coworker who seems to have everything under control and manage things properly? They are probably just best at hiding their problems than you. So it's not too late. You can do better. You can learn. You can find somebody to help you. I believe in you.

And I will do my best for myself.