#it's important to me that they're both over 70 too. they don't like mentioning their age. but they're beautifully young guys.

[thenwethrowitonthefire]

it doesn't have to be that way.

okay

I need you to know that I've been thinking about this ask non-stop for the last 3 days. This song came for us all and took us under its wing. I live here. It's a gem of a song. (This reply will get very long.)

My first time hearing it was live, as it was for a bunch of us as the album release was at the beginning of the tour. To set the scene, I was obviously really excited for any new songs I'd be hearing that night, and then Russell introduced the song like this:

"This is another brand new song for any of you who feel like maybe you're not on the right course. [He pauses briefly.] It's a song that's called 'It Doesn't Have To Be That Way'."

I was already nearly in tears, and then it started:

They always said that you cannot change your mind, Do it once and you're defined, do it twice and you're divine

...

It doesn't have to be that way, okay?

Every line of the entire song hit me like a brick while also being the most comforting thing I've ever heard. It was beautiful. And coming from the guys who for over a decade have been my personal champions of "things not having to be that way", the guys who are my people, who have by their very existence been telling us all this exact message for all these years. And here it was, in words, aimed at all of us.

They always said that you need to have a plan, Doesn't matter, any plan, any plan they'll understand, It doesn't have to be that way, okay?

... They've not been known to go for songs that bring people to tears, and I'm not known to be the kind of person to listen to songs and cry. And yet here we were.

While I can write an essay on every verse, a part that's especially meaningful to me, as a queer person, as an aspec person, is this:

They always said that it must reflect your life, And incorporate your strife, maybe mentioning your wife, It doesn't have to be that way, okay?

These *are* lines that seem to reflect their life (the entire song seems to, just as it does ours), and they're all things I've always loved so much about them, things that have paved the way for all of us. But I'm going to especially highlight the "maybe mentioning your wife" line. Here we have two (likely) heterosexual men, but they don't bring their love lives to the public eye - very consciously, and by choice. What they do with their lives is all about their music. Their lives are highly meaningful, to them and to so many people, and you don't need amatonormativity or the nuclear family to have a beautifully meaningful life. They show that every day, in all they do. Their work has always attracted many queer people of all sorts for obvious reasons, and it's been so easy to find aspec people among the fans which is a real treat. While they likely both have partners, the beauty is that we don't really know. We don't know that part of their lives and we don't need to know to know them, if they're not telling us it doesn't concern us. There's a lot of people who don't understand this though, people who feel like they don't know who Sparks are as people because these people feel like in order to know who a person is, they need to know their relationship status and whether they have a family. (In reality these people are looking at the wrong things, they're trying to classify and understand life in the only way they know, and therefore they seem to be unable to see what's there.) The added beauty of all this is that it doesn't just gives Sparks some privacy, but also it creates a safe space for all of us who aren't looking to live that way, who aren't looking to build our lives around a romantic partner, for whom the ideal life isn't one where you build a family, or for whom that do wish to live that way but where it isn't the thing that defines you. You don't have to mention a partner or make your life about that. It doesn't have to be that way, okay?

And then there's those parts of the song that go,

I may be wrong, I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it,

No chart-bound song, I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it,

No sing along, I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it

I'll pay for it

Which can be read and felt in a number of ways which all mean so much to me ... There's their own lives in it, where they've always done things their way, where people may tell them to not do things that way, and where it might not work out - I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it. Theres our lives, where we equally all make our decisions, try to just live our own ways to the best of our abilities and where we make mistakes - I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it.

And then, thirdly, to me, there's the feeling to it where they've got our backs. No chart-bound song, no sing along, that can be about an album not becoming the success it was hoped to be, but if you just look at No sing along, I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it, to me there's also an aspect of not wishing it upon another - instead carrying it for you, don't sing along. (This feeling feels further supported by the ending of the song, how 'bout a drink, I'll pay for it, it's been too long, I'll pay for it, which to me reads as paying for that drink for your friend so no one has to go through it alone nor without support.)

I'll look uncool, I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it

I'll look the fool, I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it

I'll look too schooled, I'll pay for it, I'll pay for it

I'll pay for it

The price of authenticity, the price of following your heart and your beliefs. And we all felt that.

As you can tell, this is one really really special song. It had so many of us in tears. We all spoke about it for weeks, I'm still talking about it. It's kind of like Sparks' life concepts we all already understood, that drew us here in the first place, got beautifully distilled into a song. (So much of this recent album has that quality, and it was felt all throughout the entire tour too.)

Every night Russell gave the song a slightly different introduction that hit people right in their heart. There's a quality to it performed live that makes it hit even harder than on the album. I recorded it at every show I've seen. Here's two of them:

... it especially hits hard when you're near the front, looking at these guys with your big eyes, locking eyes for a second and you know they know. (I also did a quick shot of Ron's Jordans here, seeing him wear them was always a dream of mine and here I was, stood right in front of him seeing him wear Jordans.)

[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

hi! I'm new to the beatles lore and I've been trying to catch up on an insane level of information for weeks. it's been fun but also heartbreaking 💔💔 anyways, I wanted to ask a couple of questions if that's ok? for example, I keep seeing this narrative that john was using yoko as some sort of weapon against paul... what was john trying to achieve by that I mean where does this idea even come from? according to this, john was hurting paul on purpose while he was singing him love songs in the studio asking him to be partners again (as in songwriting creative partners) WHAT WOULD JOHN ACHIEVE DOING THAT? also it sounds very one sided like paul is the most innocent in the break up eventho he was the one who came up with a secret album and a lawsuit. I don't know what to think. before knowing them I used to think lennon was in love and on drugs so he got so annoying to the point that he broke up the band but now...

Hi there! Welcome to the fandom! don't worry about feeling overwhelmed at first there is a LOT to take in.

I want to say, I do get the feeling you are somewhat mixing things up here, though I don't particularly blame you for being confused. (if not then sorry! just want to clarify as much as I can)

Tedious as it sounds, I find keeping a timeline in my mind (ideally, accurate to the month) helpful to provide some clarity regarding the breakup era specifically, so the period of 1968-1971. John's studio taunting you're referring to would have happened between mid '68 and mid '69, but Paul worked on his solo album (what I presume you meant by "his secret album", though it wasn't all that secret – John had already released solo music of his own by that point*) in late '69 and early '70. He filed a lawsuit against the others in late '70.

*I think you're conflating the album itself with the fact that, along with the release of McCartney (said album), Paul "surprise revealed" he had quit the band to the public, which the other band members, especially John, were not impressed with.

That being said, the events of the breakup are still convoluted at best, even to "seasoned" fans, I'd say. One of my main pieces of advice I can provide as someone who's been doing this for more than 3 years is get comfortable with not knowing things and with some of the actors involved doing something fundamentally irrational sometimes. They're humans, they don't always make sense and they won't always be forthcoming about why they behaved the way they did.

Which brings me to the narratives you mention: I say this as nicely as possible, but sometimes people want to tell themselves the best story rather than the most truthful one. It's more important to some that John is taunting Paul out of some twisted form of love than why specifically.

To answer your question regarding where this particular idea comes from, I would say: Paul has indicated that he felt John replaced him with Yoko (in whatever way he meant by that – some think it's sexual, some it's about creative partnership, or simply as a best friend); John's behaviour clearly and drastically shifted for the worse in mid '68, which is around the time he got together with Yoko, left his family, and started doing heroin; footage from Get Back shows John both all over Yoko and trying to reach out to Paul periodically.

There's probably more, but I don't know if there's much point in getting into the weeds of it right now. My point is: it's not the only valid theory, IMO, and probably not the whole truth if it is true, but it's not unfounded.

I think it may be a misstep to dismiss a theory because "what would John achieve by that?" Again, people are not always acting in a way that strictly makes sense, especially not people with the issues John struggled with. Some people might say John was testing Paul, trying to make him fight for him. Some might say John had an outright sadistic streak. Others that he was too out of it to notice the pain he was inflicting on others. I think it could very easily be a mix of all three. When dealing with human emotions, I personally think it's a mistake to assume things are simple and straightforward, which is why a lot of tinhattery turns me off. It very often feels like a blanket-statement self-confirming axiom, rather than a truly thoughtful and multifaceted argument.

My most condensed version of events would be: John became incredibly difficult to work with in multiple ways (including but not limited to bringing Yoko to the studio) by mid '68; Paul, for the most part, tried to accomodate him, to diminishing returns, while having his own longterm relationship fall apart and being completely in over his head running a brandnew business; Paul deals with distress by burying himself in work, the other three do not – this leads to further conflict, along with issues over creative control; the band decide they need a new manager type to help them out with their new business and provide the guidance they haven't had since Brian died; cue John wanting Klein and only Klein and massively distrusting Paul's "nepo" choice of Eastman + apparently not trusting Paul's belief that Klein was bad news; extreme resentment over money issues which are incredibly underrated by the fandom because at their core they are boring, emotionally, ensue; John decides he's "over" the band and tells the others he's out; Paul is destroyed over this (and everything that led up to it), spends months spiraling and recording his album; wanting to get this all out of the way, Paul finally breaks down and admits he's leaving the Beatles to the world and to the band itself, even though he had asked John to stay quiet about his own quitting the band months earlier; John (understandably, IMO, though I don't blame Paul exactly – this is what I mean by not everything makes perfect sense) assumes Paul is using the band breakup for PR and gets a hell of a lot angrier than he already is about the money stuff; John undergoes primal therapy which opens up about 43273289635298 wounds; John does an interview in which he spills his guts and tears down almost everyone in his life except Yoko; meanwhile more financial issues. I cannot overstate that those matter too, tumblr is just not a place where finance peeps hang out; Paul is getting more and more fed up with all of this and he, as a last resort, files a lawsuit to no longer be legally tied to the others.

I for the most part left out George and Ringo here* and I'm writing off memory here without re-checking sources, so take what I say with a massive grain of salt. My main point is that this shit is complicated and don't let people tell you it isn't.

*I'm of the opinion that John and Paul are at the center of the breakup, but they also aren't the be-all, end-all of it. But because in the end George and Ringo fell "in line" with John and you didn't ask about them, I decided to mostly leave them out.

[techno-danger]

*ummm... I saw your tag and the comment and I hope you're at a safe place now. I hope it's not too much. I apologize if this reopens old wound.*

Hey, thanks so much for the concern. I'm completely fine to talk about being kicked out. It helped me leave my toxic situation all that much easier.

Thankfully my Nana let me move in with her the same day so I'm grateful i never ended up on the streets cause that's exactly where I would've been without the help and support I have now. I've got my own increased disability pension, my support worker who's helped me since I graduated high school 3 years ago has been there for me every new milestone I achieve and even helped me get my birth certificate, id's and other important stuff of mine back. I managed to have my first paying job last year at Christmas and my old boss even asked if I wanted to come back again this year! (I am btw, gonna be taking ALL the selfies with Santa :D). I've been applying for jobs about every week but nothing has gone through yet (you would not BELIEVE how many big companies have switched over to AI Interviews its been A NIGHTMARE-) however I'll be going back to Tafe (tertiary education) to get cert 3 in Child Care and see where that might take me, hopefully down a similar line as my support worker, he's helped change my life so much and is one of my biggest heroes. In fact we're even going to Melbourne next week for the PAX convention and he's been helping get our cosplays ready (Going as Verosika Mayday and Stolas from Helluva Boss).

All this compared to when I was practically an unpaid maid in my own home and was literally told often that I don't deserve my own opinion since I was acting "childish" and "disrespectful". That the reason I was suicidal and depressed was because I was "too lazy" to do my chores when I was told to. That if I brought in the washing creased or didnt cook a UNIQUE dinner every night or forgot to wash the dishes afterwards, I hadn't earned the right to eat breakfast the next day. Heck, if I hadn't done some of my chores (cause I was literally out of the house around 9 hours a day studying for a course I BEGGED to quit), like if the clothes got creased in the basket from when my parent left them for WEEKS in their room or vacuum the floor of the entire house, I would have to pay them a "Maid Tax" of $30 (AUD) for every chore of that they did. Oh and I also didn't have any kind of allowance growing up, just a centrelink pension of about $500 a fortnight that I had no control over.

This is all stuff I had to deal with since I was about 11, and I had a lot of other trauma from my other parent when I was younger, as well as other stuff I don't want to mention. I know there are worse things people can go through but I hope no kids get stuck in the same situation I was. No one deserves to feel like they earn the right to just exist in the world. Just because they're acting like a child having a temper tantrum doesn't excuse you having to be the adult in the relationship. I'm 21 in 2 months and I've had to be way more mature than the rest of my family who are in their 60's and 70's (who KNEW how my parent treated me) just so I could mentally survive. Even if they hadn't laid hands on me for a long time, emotional abuse still counted as domestic abuse, a fact I think my parent forgot.

I am fairly certain my parent has undiagnosed BPD, my psychologist and support worker both seem to think so after seeing the messages I've received from my parent over the year, going from scathing rants to suicidal goodbyes to ignoring me for months to civilized invitations to events we both like and then back to scathing rants. I've lived with my parent for so long I understand how their thought process usually goes so I can understand where each of the actions come from but that doesn't mean I'll be excusing them anymore.

They're still my parent, the one who's loved me, raised me, fought for me, guided me and helped support me for my entire life. However, I also have to accept that they're narcissistic, manipulative and hypocritical. Just because I love them does not mean I love how I'm treated by them. I hope that anyone who's going through anything similar to this can find the help they need to get a better support system and rise above the situation you're in. Take it from someone who can't see their own future still, it DOES slowly get better as long as you have at least one person you can count on.

Seriously thanks for the ask, I've never really gotten to properly talk/write about my life before and how it's changed so much in just a year. I hope you have a great day :))

[fandoomrants]

Okay, I'm glad for the second response! Also, I admire your on point examples as while I remember most things, it's been a while since I've read the books so there are some details I don't remember perfectly.

1. Yes, you actually have a point here, there are shop owners and musicians. I just meant, they make it seem as if there's not much to do in that world altogether. Like, think of how many work positions there are in the muggle world compared to the wizarding one. Sure, they don't need a big part of them but I just wish we had seen more people working different things. I know the series are from Harry's perspective so most people he sees are teachers or people form the Order and most work in the Ministry of Magic but still, even in Fantastic Beasts we meet only these people. There are many more professions, I believe.

2. Okay, yeah, that was a bad example but it was sorta connected to the other points and the teachers, especially DADA teachers. I'm pretty sure that everyone who attended Hogwarts during the time Harry did, learnt almost nothing from like, half of these teachers. Like, I mentioned in my og post, I'm a teacher. There's a structure, lesson plan, stuff that need to be covered, and they all seemed to be just... Doing stuff. Sure there were books and all but you can't tell me they learnt something from half of these people because we have so many examples of them not following these at all. Not to mention the cancelled exams when Harry was in second year. I like to believe the 5th and 7th year students still had their exams, seeing how this is something compared to A levels and stuff. So my point was, there were definitely things that weren't learned at school (even if they should be).

Thoo, now I actually have a following thought - it is said that Harry and Ron never went back for year 7, and I think the Weasley twins also didn't finish their education? So maybe years 6 and 7 were sort of for more advanced stuff. And maybe you can't become like, teacher or doctor if you don't.

3. Yeah, and I'm actually so glad they included that auror training because that would have been otherwise really weird.

I agree it's old fashioned, yeah. Not to mention that the majority of teachers are really old too. I think it was said wizards live longer than muggles? Wasn't Dumbledore 100+? I bet most teachers were over 70. So that now just creates an even bigger problem, in my head.. 😅😅

4. Oh, yeah, like, I don't dislike Dumbledore but I absolutely do not agree with a lot of things he did either. Like, there was reasoning behind most of these and that lots of the decisions he made weren't in favour of Hogwarts but as a whole for the Wizarding World (or so he believed) but still. I love Hagrid but even Harry decided to not continue his class. And Lockhart... I don't know what to say, actually. I understand about some of the others, he didn't have much of a choice when it came to Umbridge, he didn't really know Quirell, he wanted to give Hagrid a chance. Same can be said for Remus too, tho I think choosing a werewolf, even if he was in fact the most competent, was also alarming. But Lockhart... Ugh.

Not to mention, he was literally putting these DADA teachers in risk because chances something happened to them was big.

I somewhat think that it was better the school where they actually teach them to use their powers was more important than the Ministry, tho.

5. Okay, here I had to elaborate a bit. I think a teacher should be good in what they're doing and want to do it, too. Yes, it's important they want to teach but it's also important that they're actually competent to do so. Both in being able to handle children, and having a good approach towards the subject. I have many coworkers that really love children but I still wouldn't say they're the best when it comes to teaching them the things they have to just because they lack certain... Skills. And let's take for example Hagrid again, so it'll be more understandable. He liked his position but he definitely wasn't a good teacher.

I don't want to defend Snape, in fact, I think that lots of the students would have had fared better in Potions if he wasn't acting the way he was but I think it was mostly just making them not want to put much effort. I believe Hermione had good gades in Potions despite Snape being a jerk to her too. I agree that he maybe didn't teach them theories and all but I believe that Hermione was good in potions before year 6 because the recipes Snape gave for Potions were the ones he had changed like in his old book, not the ones they had to actually use. So, I think he was teaching them the right things but he really wasn't putting more than the needed effort in it, and his lack of desire was reflecting on them. When it comes to Harry, I think it was a kind of biased point of view here, born from his hatred for Snape and therefore lack of interest in the subject. Snape was incredibly bad when it came to handling children. So, yeah, he wasn't a good teacher as in total lack of social skills, but he was competent and they had some chance of learning something there (compared to some of the other teachers, that is).

I can honestly make a whole post only about the teaching, tho.

6. Yeah, that was basically my point here. There must have been many teachers and they, for one reason or another, ended their career after one year. So I can sort of see how there wasn't much of a choice left than hire anyone who applied but also if I have learned one thing is, if there's a constant need for employees somewhere or for some position in the case, there must be a good reason so DON'T APPLY. 😅😅

Also, I really want to add, I hope that I don't sound like someone who only tries to argue. I answered the previous one while at work so I was in a bit of a rush but I make these posts with the idea of someone eventually engaging in them and answering. So, thank you for discussing these.

No but I have so many questions about the wizarding world which always come to my mind whenever I think of HP. And every new question just branches into a couple of others.

Granted, some are answered and some are so largely fanoned that most people already believed it to be canon but still.

First of all, what do all these people do, like... I feel like you have a few options only. You can become an auror or work in the Ministry of Magic in general (but tell me, how many unoccupied positions there are?!), you can work in St. Mungo's or something, or you can be a teacher and basically... This is it. Yeah, we have people like Newt but I feel like not many are into these things and also, it's pretty dangerous, isn't it?

And another thing. Like, how do they learn some of the spells that are not studied at school? Okay, let's say pure bloods have someone to teach the but muggle born? Others? How do you know how to make a car fly or sth?

How there isn't some type of Wizard University?! Where one can actually specialise in a certain field, let's say medicine?

Also, can likee, everyone become a teacher? Because I feel like that's really the case... (Ok, I'm in fact a teacher and for a fact I can say where I work it's sorta like that too but it's not your typical school and these are schools that everyone from the country/region attends..)

Like, no degree, no nothing. Do they just check how good was the person at this certain subject or what? How dangerous they are? And people seeing how each time there's a new DADA teacher, lots of them dying or something, why do they keep applying?! Even if you don't know about the curse, why?

Honestly, I have so many questions about Hogwarts and wizarding schools in general that it can be a post on its own.

[aseplant]

mildly rabid ember knight trivia

so i've been compiling a (slightly obsessive) mini wiki to write ember knight fics over the past year or so, since last i checked the fandom wiki page is a little... lacking? (then again, that was like back in december, so it may have improved since then.)

anyway, i figured i'd post some of the more useful bits as a resource in case anyone else is interested ✨

spoilers for both gilgamesh (the prequel) and ember knight, up to episode 80ish? i read the raws (sort of) so pls proceed with caution if you are not keen on that.

General World Notes

mechanics of an apprenticeship

the general populace are just considered citizens of the empire.

up from that is a knight-in-training, who is still considered a citizen. it's not clear to me exactly what this entails, but in gilgamesh, i believe tludia says that she mostly did menial tasks for the knights? and it seems the woodion apprentices were receiving training from fadiyan for this in the beginning.

a selection process is held after this; there are different proctors in different regions. if you pass that, next is knight's apprentice - these people are no longer citizens (ek 5). our delightful protagonist is mucking around in this stage rn.

a typical class seems to focus on training + gaining a good understanding of honor through knighthood lessons

these knighthood lessons seem to be directed by your peers, but the knights do comment on the presentations

noteworthy is that their class (2nd special class) functions differently than most - in anticipation of war with the eastern continent, the second special class is intended to also perform knights' missions while training (ek 8).

it's not too clear yet what happened to the first special class, but its survivors are introduced in ek 70 or so (forgot the exact number sry)

knighthood - "you either try to become worthy of the title, or are given the title because you are worthy" (ek 8)

slightly unrelated and possibly just speculation, but it seems that training the next generation is looked down upon (not sure if this is for all apprenticeships in general, or just for training the knights-in-training).

when tink gets assigned to teaching the knights-in-training, kandentia says "the trainee camp?! are you out of your mind? or did you not recognize his talent? he shouldn't be wasting his talent in a place like that!" - gilgamesh 112

knighthood as an institution

there are two types of knights - order knights and free knights. the five teachers & fadiyan in ember knight are all order knights, meaning they go through rigorous training and are therefore more consistently strong (gilgamesh 20 // i know zius mentions this in ember knight too but i don't have an ep for that).

free knights, on the other hand, are simply given a title - it seems to be bc they're exceptional/for political purposes, but uhhh don't quote me on that...

on honor:

knights are controlled through honor. they can't break their word and can only participate in wars/fights with permission from the emperor. but know that honor has no meaning if no one is watching... (gilgamesh 22). some spicy quotes:

"there is no set standard for honor. it can be different for each person. something that is dishonorable to me may not be to waron." tink, gilgamesh 67

"honor, for a knight, is in some ways more important than their lives. and entrusting it to another is to give up all personal values, even the emperor, and granting them a chance to command with absolute authority." ram, gilgamesh 88

AND GEAS. OH GOD LET'S TALK ABOUT GEAS.

geas is a knight's weakness. it is the method in which the emperor controls knights; knights swear one oath to the emperor, and another is bestowed upon them as a set of conditions that they must follow.

honestly, this isn't really something that has consequences, except for those that knights enforce upon each other after the devil knight.

recently tho there have been reported cases of (usually weak knights) developing supernatural abilities after swearing by their geas. like with narin weapons, it seems understanding how to use this power is instinctual once bestowed. zius's event horizon would be an example of this.

"truth be told, there's no price to pay even if the oath is broken. if anything, i guess there may be something to be gained by keeping it that way. i think the supernatural power of the knight may also have something to do with it" - zius, ek 61

this is also backed by an otherworldly being that intervenes when ram tries to destroy the world - he explains that the world is incomplete, so when things transcend the limits of the world a new rule/law (translations are not very clear on the difference) is established. a knight's strength is considered one of these things that is capped, and then he vagueblogs abt geas (gilgamesh 116)

anyway it's all v sus <3

quotes abt important qualities of a knight:

"never forget. knowledge is mightier than power. only one who knows that... can become a knight." fadiyan, ek 1

"you know you're the strongest here! and that teamwork is vital for knights...!" luzian, ek 1

"facing an opponent you could not defeat... the worst situation possible... you did not succumb. you kept your head held high, and chose to act in a righteous way. that is the true virtue at the basis of knighthood, and the most important skill you can harness." ludika, ek 18

"one cannot become a knight with strength alone. without the ability to persuade, even the strongest knight cannot lead. a knight must have their own sense of justice that is persuasive. to be able to do something on your own, unswayed by outside forces. that is justice. don't mock others for how they think. it's not your way or the highway." - zius, ek 20

world map

there's an official map at the end of gilgamesh 75 and a fan map here, produced by 0l0lmono. some notable locations:

west bridge - where knights fight against demons (the inhabitants of the eastern continent. they're not really demons, just a different race, probably). tink was once assigned here and demoted (gilgamesh 20 & 23), and waron replaced him at some point (gilgamesh 64)

the capital - the knights' stomping grounds. knight accolading is held here.

a note on the timeline between gilgamesh & ember knight

so... we know zius was knighted 5 years ago in ember knight, and that he met & fought with waron a couple months after being knighted.

meanwhile, in gilgamesh 106, when waron fights hinsher, she thinks there should be about 5 people who can beat hinsher, and zius's silhouette is displayed. it's clear she'd already met him at that point, then, and not recently either, since she'd been stationed at west bridge for a while - so ember knight is at most, let's say, 4 years out from the end of gilgamesh.

given the slight time skip at the end in which tludia's hair grows out, i have been informed by a friend that this would take about 2 years, so if we take that to be accurate ember knight is probably only two years after the events of gilgamesh.

(not that this matters too much, but thought i'd put it out there if anyone needs or is keen on constructing a better timeline.)

Factions Crash Course (past & present)

Malto - a religion of sorts (gilgamesh 20). here, knighthood means nothing, and magic power is everything.

lower ranks shave their hair off (gilgamesh 26); they are extremely cult-like and used very coercive tactics to force knights & knights-in-training alike to join their ranks

tludia was in fact expelled by tink to avoid this fate (gilgamesh 103)

they aim to discover and record everything there is to know about magic, starting from the 2nd great mage all the way down to the great immortal (gilgamesh 37)

in truth, the organization was created to protect the existence of magic after the first great mage went down the wrong path (gilgamesh epilogue)

at the end of the events of gilgamesh, malto is dissolved and their research propagated through the world

Oni - an elite group of warriors from the eastern continent. oni training starts at age 7 (gilgamesh 64). their throats are slit so that they cannot talk, and they are not taught to read or write so that their secrets may die with them.

they typically communicate through sign language

they are named after the notch of an arrow. unlike the western continent (where ember knight & gilgamesh take place), they attach onis (knocks) to their arrows rather than carving it into the arrow directly; the replaceable nature of the oni is where their name comes from.

Dragon's Descendants - the masked bandits. zius confirms in one episode (nooot sure which but it's probably late 70s) that they are not actually descended from dragons; it's simply their tribe name.

notable members include liamin and laurun - and, based on the naming scheme and hair/eye color, probably lauzun as well.

they seem to be seeking revenge for the destruction of their village under the knights' sanction. i think six or so years ago (?? don't quote me on this one tho), darang and a couple other knights slaughtered most of their tribe and burned the entire village down.

it's a fascinating parallel to what they have done with nagyunn!

not too clear what their connection with the real najin was, but many fan theories speculate that fadiyan had originally ordered najin to join them as a spy.

five years ago, laurun worked with zius & regia to research zius's geas-induced ability. he mentions that the dragon's descendants have been, for a long time, swearing oaths that granted similar abilities, and that the knights are late to the game (ek 65)

Free Knights - i'm going to take a moment to list them separately as a faction, bc it's clear atp that the free knights have their own agenda. the schism first started, according to darang, back in the war conference abt what to do with tink's body (final ep of gilgamesh), and she blames regia for it.

for his part, regia tells zius to his face that whatever happens, it's the order knights' karma coming for them. i wouldn't be surprised if they're colluding with the dragons' descendants in some way, but it's a little early to say.

Character Notes

age hell

so... we have like. next to no official character age data. here's what we do have from gilgamesh tho!

waron is placed between hinsher and tink here, but god knows if that means she's between 22 & 31 or if she's been 22 & 531. (also - although it's labeled as ???, after the events of gilgamesh it's probably safe to say that ram is around 2000 years old.)

i'll talk about the knight characters first. here, tludia was a knight-in-training. i'm not sure if tanshirin was a knight's apprentice or a knight-in-training, though she does become a knight post-timeskip at the end of gilgamesh (which would put her at around 23-24 when she was knighted). tink was considered a genius but still young for a knight at age 22.

so we can see that ages can vary for characters. going off vibes alone, i would put the ember knight apprentices as younger than tludia, but probably still in their late teens, so all in the 16-19 range probably.

as for the ember knight teacher knights: it seems to be common to be knighted in your early 20s. ludika, zius, and fadiyan are all from the same apprentice class, so they're probably 27-30, i'd say? waron and darang are almost certainly older, though i'm not sure by how much; going off vibes alone i'd say darang is probably only one or two years older than zius & ludika, but who knows. no idea where to place fidorance because we haven't seen any of his past yet.

finally, i wanted to point out nepherin, the dragon. she's 600 but still a child. it's been hinted at in the raws (ek ep80-82?? somewhere around there) that dragons' development is not chronological, but instead contingent on their understanding of the world; the more they understand about their place as a magical being and the rules of the world, the more mature they will become. since nepherin was raised by an absentee human father, it seems she hasn't developed any of this awareness yet. so the youthfulness says less about dragons than it says about her, i'd say.

strength rankings

or my best guess of it, anyway. masked bandits not included, but they do seem to be better trained than their knights' apprentice peers.

kandentia/event horizon zius

waron

fidorance (probably)

darang

ludika

fadiyan

gatekeepers (senior apprentices)

marsha

paimel/wadrin/nuljin

normal zius/yulnia

other apprentices

nagyunn

random notes on how people refer to one another

take everything here with a grain of salt bc i can barely read the korean alphabet and do not have the best understanding of honorifics/speech patterns.

Fadiyan:

the kids never actually call her fadiyan - instead, they call her knight-nim (기사님)

ludika simply calls her deer/doe (not sure which is more accurate), but can be seen calling her fadi in flashbacks

Ludika:

fadiyan calls her 'crybaby' and ludi theyre gfs fr

the woodion apprentices initially also call her knight-nim, but begin to clarify that as fox-nim after episode 10

zius & fidorance call her fox (no honorifics)

darang calls her ludika (no honorifics) - i think this implies they are closer than the others...? dont at me akefhweewf i didnt watch enough kdramas for this

Darang:

zius & fidorance call her raccoon

Waron:

zius & fidorance: black hen, but have both referred to her as waron to others

ludika: has called her waron to others, not sure what she calls waron by to her face tho

darang: waron-ssi

Fidorance:

waron & zius: wild dog

darang: haven't seen it yet, but probably fidorance-ssi

Zius:

ludika, waron (probably fidorance too): qilin

darang: zius-ssi

Apprentices:

ludika mentally refers to them as 에송이 (stripling, greenhorn, children) and 병아리 (literally "chicks", translated to "little baby chicks")

fidorance also calls them chicks in ek 35, i genuinely do not understand if there is some other implication here

Nagyunn/Najin:

lauzun & nagyunn both address najin as jin-ah (진아) which is supposed to denote affection, i think

it's interesting to note here that while pretending to be najin, nagyunn has always just called him lauzun. ouch.

after ~ep 24, the woodion apprentices (nagyunn included) start calling him jun instead of lauzun tho

najin simply calls nagyunn by name in ep 2&4, but calls him gyunn-ah in flashbacks (ep 3 & 9)

Miscellaneous notes:

tyr & nagyunn both refer to the knights as [animal]-nim (ex: raccoon-nim, qilin-nim), while lauzun & luzian do [name]-nim (ex: waron-nim, fidorance-nim). i've been told this is mostly up to personal preference, and in fact calling them [name]-nim might be more formal??? but i did not get a super clear answer on this.

nagyunn sometimes refers to knights by their full title (color + animal, ex: cerulean qilin zius) rather than [animal]-nim. notably, i've only really seen this in the episodes where he's pretending to be a spy for the skeleton, so that may be related.

zius has called both ludika & fidorance by name when they were arguing (ek 44) - it seems he tends to pull this card during emotionally tense situations?

Bonus: Knighthood Trivia

kandentia became the youngest knight ever at the unprecedented age of 14 (gilgamesh 146)

hinsher was the first female knight (gilgamesh 128)

zius graduated at the bottom of his class (ek 64)

and that's a wrap!

[quokkacore]

can you dig it? (m) [kim doyoung & kim jungwoo]

summary: post concert highs can be a real bummer, and tonight, after a particularly intense performance, your boyfriends help you come down.

pairing: kim doyoung x kim jungwoo x fem!reader

genre: poly!au, 70s!au, band!au, smut, fluff

warnings: drug usage (weed specifically), mentions of other substances (lsd and cocaine), shotgunning, established poly relationship, soft dom jungwoo, mentioned switch jungwoo, hard dom doyoung, sub reader, high sex, sex on a water bed!!, unprotected sex, spit kink, they're all so sweaty help, mxm, degradation kink, praise kink, orgasm denial, overstimulation, minor possessiveness

song recs: don’t stop - fleetwood mac // unlock it (feat. kim petras & jay park) - charli xcx // love her madly - the doors // ziggy stardust - david bowie // rhiannon - fleetwood mac // eclipse - kim lip (loona) // flick of the wrist - queen

word count: 5.4k

a/n: this is for my best friend, who i love with all my heart,bc last month we were talking abt the dowoo photoshoot and she said smth about high sex with dowoo. happy birthday queen <3 thank u for listening to me complain abt writing all the time :’)

masterlist

Friday, July 22rd, 1977

The concert hall smelled like cocaine and sweat, you noted to yourself as the three of you joined hands to bow. Cheers from the crowd bounced off of the walls as you bid them your final goodbye, wishing them a good night and telling them to drive safe. Still, their chanting persisted. "Seoul Motel! Seoul Motel! Seoul Motel!" 

You wondered vaguely if this was what it was like to be a young god.

The curtain lowered, and the three of you were ushered offstage, to take some pictures and then head back to the hotel, to try and get some rest before you were off to Philadelphia, some five or so hours from where you were now: Boston. 

Truthfully, everything passed in a blur. It was almost always like this after these concerts. The thrill and euphoria of performing made it difficult to focus on things. That might have also been because Jungwoo had passed you a joint before the concert. You couldn't be completely sure.

Your tambourine and guitar seemingly disappeared, but you knew it would show up tomorrow for soundcheck when you got to the Philadelphia venue, right along with Jungwoo's bass guitar and Doyoung's drum kit.

What you did know was that here, in the car back to the hotel that your manager was driving, lecturing you and Jungwoo about the importance of being sober when talking to reporters, Doyoung had a hand on your thigh, and that was all you could focus on. 

Doyoung was high too. You knew this because ten minutes before you were needed on stage he pulled you forward by the hips and told you to take a few hits from the hand rolled joint and blow the smoke into his mouth. Of course, he wasn't as high as you and Jungwoo were, and he knew how to hide it better. But if you were to get close enough you'd notice the redness rimming his eyes, the dilation of his pupils.

The three of you were something, that was for sure. You had been, probably ever since Jungwoo joined the band, some eight years ago, in the fall of '69. You only really defined what you were once you got your first big hit thanks to some disc jockey in LA playing a song you had written, Calabasas, on the radio back in '73. 

The song had blown up, and suddenly the three of you were whisked into a whirlwind of celebrities, drugs, paparazzi and producers who thought the three of you were born yesterday. Yes, you were college kids that ran on booze and weed, but you weren’t complete morons. That was when the three of you sat down to properly discuss boundaries, what slid and what didn’t.

You and your boys decided that night that weren’t down with the idea of everyone knowing. Too many prying eyes. The public didn’t really know, because the press would have a damn field day. 

Other than that, it was a pretty open secret. In the industry, who was going around with who didn’t really matter—a lot of them were too off their face to even care. You realized that a few years back when David Bowie walked in on you watching Jungwoo and Doyoung get it on in a bathroom at some afterparty in New York City, and closed the door muttering something about how strong the edibles were.

 So, what your manager said fell on deaf ears. Too much weed, too much adrenaline, too much energy for someone who needed to head back onto the road in a few hours.

 When you finally got back to the hotel, Jungwoo grabbed your hand in the elevator on the way up to your rooms, which were right next to each other. "You said that your bed was really big… can we come up?"

You nodded, leaning against his arm. Doyoung hummed affectionately at the sight, noting how tired you both were. 

"You two are about five seconds from passing out," Doyoung mumbled, and you waved your hand in denial. 

"Are not," you protested like a child.

"Y/N, don't be a chump. I'm pretty sure if Woo weren't next to you, you'd have fallen over."

You didn't have the energy to counter, and as the elevator slid open, you were the first one to march out, ready to just take a cold shower and die for the next few hours. 

Realistically, you knew that wasn't what would happen. What would happen was that you would shower, get into bed and then toss and turn for another hour or so. Only then would the adrenaline truly wear off. The weed didn't help, making you feel sleepy. 

You unlocked the door, and Doyoung and Jungwoo gawked at the sight—and size—of your bed. It could probably fit all three of you easily. 

Since only one room would spark rumors, the manager usually booked two: one for Doyoung and Jungwoo and one for you. Your room always went unused. Usually, you would have to push Doyoung's and Jungwoo's beds together to make enough room, leaving an awkward and uncomfortable dip for the person in the middle. Whoever got the middle was handed the terrible double edged sword: cuddles galore, but a sore back in the morning. 

Immediately Jungwoo jumped onto the bed, gasping and immediately laughed gleefully as the bed sloshed underneath him. 

"A water bed!?" He exclaimed, splaying out his limbs. "Oh, far out. You really lucked out, dollface." 

He kicked off his shoes and curled up in the middle, eyes fluttering shut. You followed, sitting at the side as you peeled off your white leather go-go boots. Throwing yourself down next to him, you sighed at the sensation of waves beneath you, and nodded. "Oh, this is ace," You murmured, "Feels great."

Peeling one eye open as Jungwoo wrapped his arm around you, your gaze landed on Doyoung, who was still leaning against the wall. You beckoned him over with a hand. "C'mere, princey." 

He made sure that the air conditioner was working before sitting down on the other side of Jungwoo, for which you were grateful. The still drying sweat on the back of your neck and on your chest started to cool instantly. You and Jungwoo giggled as Doyoung’s weight sent waves rippling beneath you.

"So, are you guys gonna sleep or what?" Doyoung asked, kicking his shoes off as well and peeling off his denim jacket. His eyes were still wide open and he didn't look tired at all. "I'm probably staying up a little later, I have some ideas for some lyrics I want to get down—"

"I would love to sleep. But I can't," Jungwoo declared before glancing knowingly at the both of you, "and neither can either of you." 

You hummed in agreement. "Hmm, you're not wrong. Too much energy left."

You turned to bury your face into his chest. His forest green short-sleeved button up was only buttoned up halfway, easily revealing his collarbones. He smelled like pot, sweat, and designer cologne. His chest rumbled as he continued to speak. 

"What about you, bunny boy? You can't tell me you don't still feel it."

"The weed or the concert jitters?" Doyoung's voice was raspy, cautious. He had a feeling he knew where this conversation was going. Once you and Jungwoo ganged up on him, it wouldn't take long to wear him down.

"Both," You and Jungwoo said in unison. You laughed at the sound. Doyoung chuckled as well, and you cracked your eyes open, despite how cozy you felt with Jungwoo stroking the skin of your nape.

"Well, the jitters are still there. That's why I'm staying up. As for the weed… well, yeah. I still feel it."

Jungwoo sighed. "How's the weed hitting you, though?"

"Honestly?" Doyoung's eyes met yours, and you felt something simmer in your chest. He huffed, deciding to take a bite of the apple, and leaned towards the both of you. 

"The weed, plus watching you two perform… Safe to say I'm pretty fuckin' horny right now."

You bit your lip, giving him a sleepy grin. "Oh, Woo, we turned him on." The teasing tone wasn't missed despite the sleepiness in your tone. 

"And what about it?" Doyoung asked, leaning back on his hands. "You can't say that watching Jungwoo do the thing doesn't get you going."

"I have a thing?" 

"We all have a thing, Woo. Princey's over there is at the end of Mr. Jones' Motorcycle. You know, when he finishes the solo? He always throws his head back, because there's sweat and hair in his eyes. You can see his neck and shit..."

Jungwoo blinked. "Shit, that is his thing… What's mine?"

You raised an eyebrow at Doyoung. "His is the thing where he gets so into it that he throws his head back and plays, and still manages to get every bass note right, right?" 

Doyoung nodded with a satisfied hum. "Gets you going, right?"

You brought a hand up to Jungwoo's chest, slowly sliding it down his stomach. Your voice lowered to a raspy murmur, and Jungwoo's hand tightened around your waist. "Damn right it does." 

"And plus, you both have told me that watching me put together the drum kit is hot."

"'Cause it is!" Again you laughed as Jungwoo said the same thing you did. 

"Jungwoo." Doyoung's voice sounded thicker. "You can't tell me that Y/N isn't an absolute vixen on stage." 

"You're right," The younger man answered, voice gruff. His hand slid down, gripping your butt and giving it a light squeeze, before directing his words at you. "Oh! Y/N, your thing is when—you know how every time you play the transition from Calabasas to Saturn’s Rings you sway your hips and flip your hair back and forth? Sometimes you’ll look at me or at Doyoung while you do, and you looked at me tonight. You're a little tease up there, dollface."

Your breath hitched at their words. “Oh, yeah?” You goaded, cuddling further into Jungwoo’s chest. You let a coy smile grace your face as your eyes fluttered shut. “What do you want me to do about it?”

“Don’t be a brat,” Doyoung growled.

“No, Doie,” Jungwoo hummed. He suddenly sounded a lot more awake. “...What would you have her do about it?”

Your eyes fluttered open, swallowing despite the sudden dryness in your throat. Doyoung's pupils were still blown wide, but you were pretty sure it wasn't because of the weed. He licked his lips. "Princess, get on your knees." 

Jungwoo prompted you up, pulling you up to stand at the side of the bed. Doyoung circled around the bed, before standing next to Jungwoo. Your gaze fluttered between your two boyfriends, one looking stern, the other looking like he was having the time of his life. 

Quietly, you lowered yourself to kneel on the plush carpet, fingers gripping the silver fabric of your dress' skirt to hike it up, so that you wouldn't kneel on it. Your hands itched to reach for them but you knew you needed to ask for permission. "Can I touch you?" 

Doyoung smiled, reaching for his belt. "There's our good girl," He said. Your mouth was already watering embarrassingly as you helped him undo his belt, pulling him out of his boxers. He was already half hard, and as you lifted your hand to spit in it, someone grabbed you gently by the rest. Jungwoo leaned over, turning your hand to reveal your palm to him. His eyes seemed to burn into yours as he let his spit fall into the palm of your hand. You felt your legs close, thighs trying to rub together at the sight. 

"Go on," Jungwoo murmured, using a hand on your jaw to move your head. Your eyes fell on Doyoung's cock again, slowly getting harder and harder. Your hand wrapped around it, stroking slowly as you met his smoldering gaze. You stroked him until he was rock hard in your grip, and his breathing turned heavy. Again, you swallowed, and Doyoung noticed this time. 

“What is it, princess? You want it in your mouth?”

“Yes, please,” You whispered, eyes wide. He chuckled breathily, head tipping back as you ran your thumb over the slit. His eyes met Jungwoo’s, who was palming himself through his pants.  

“What do you think, baby?” He asked him.

“Don’t be mean, Doyoung,” Jungwoo said softly. “Look at her, she’s desperate. Isn’t that right, Y/N?”

You whined, nodding. The pair chuckled. Jungwoo grinned at the state you were already in. “Go ahead, dollface. Give it a kiss.”

Before Doyoung could say anything else, you took his dick into your mouth, and let out a soft moan at how heavy he felt, hot and pulsing. He let out a guttural groan of your name, a hand burying itself in your hair. His other hand gripped Jungwoo’s shirt, pulling him forward to meet in a tongue-filled kiss. 

Slowly, Doyoung’s hips started rocking back and forth, grinding into your mouth. Your hands stroked what you couldn’t fit, as well as his balls. Your eyes fluttered shut, trying to relax so as to not gag on his length. But when he sped up, it became too much to avoid. 

A tap on your shoulder, and Doyoung let you off of his cock. You turned your head to look up at a very flushed Jungwoo, who had pulled his dick out of his pants as well. The words, “Me too?” tumbled out of his swollen lips. And with that gentle, breathy tone, who were you to disobey?

You wrapped your lips around Jungwoo, who hissed at the sudden heat of your mouth. From there, something primal inside of you took control, wanting nothing more than to please—you took turns sucking them off and stroking them, the muffled sounds of their moaning spurring you on.

It was always like this—during sex, Doyoung was the meaner one, manhandling you and throwing degrading words in your face that made your stomach curl in sick pleasure. He was the one who could put you in your place when you became too bratty to handle. Jungwoo was gentler, but he was all too content to watch Doyoung toss you around. He would always swoop in after Doyoung took you apart, and piece you back together. He’d tell you how good you were, how good you made the both of them feel, and while he definitely didn’t treat you like fragile porcelain, he definitely didn’t leave as many bruises as Doyoung did. 

And then, when they were both done, they’d shower you in kisses, and whisper in your ear how grateful they were to love you, and say some philosophical thing about eternal love and the cosmos that you’d always be too fucked out to comprehend, but that made your heart do a backflip regardless. 

“Shit,” Jungwoo groaned, pulling away from Doyoung’s lips. “Y/N, I’m gonna cum.” 

You pulled off of Doyoung to look up at Jungwoo. “In my—in my mouth, please, Woo.”

He nodded, licking his lips as his hands fisted themselves in your hair, gripping but not pulling as he allowed you to touch him the way you wanted. His hands gathered the loose strands into a makeshift ponytail, using it to guide your mouth up and down his hot cock. His hips bucked into your willing mouth, the sound of his hissing and his moaning getting louder and louder, until… 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, Y/N… Y/N!" He groaned, as he came into your mouth. His head tipped back, which gave Doyoung access to his neck, pressing sloppy kisses to the skin. This sight was worth the bitter taste that coated your tongue: one of your lovers in ecstasy while the other anchored him to the ground. 

He left his dick in your mouth for a moment, before pulling out with a shaky breath. Doyoung pulled away, letting him breathe. As Jungwoo caught his breath, Doyoung pulled you up, and he sat on the bed, bringing you down with him to straddle his lap. 

You turned your head to face Jungwoo, who smiled at you, coming closer to the both of you. One of his hands patted the top of your head. "That was wicked," He said. 

Doyoung smiled softly, and gripped your chin to get you to face him. His sweet grin didn't disappear as his grip forced your mouth open. He groaned at the sight of your tongue coated in Jungwoo's semen. 

"Gorgeous," He mumbled, eyes trained on your lips as it began to spill out. 

"Kiss her," Jungwoo told him, "You know you want to."

So he did, his tongue almost immediately slipping past your lips to get a taste of Jungwoo for himself, swallowing it down greedily. Your hands came up to unbutton his black dress shirt, and his hands pushed up the skirt of your dress to get you to rock your hips against his. You gasped against his mouth at the feeling of only your soaked panties separating him and you, before pushing the shirt off of him. 

He moved to lie you down on the bed. As he pulled away from you, you caught his tongue slipping out to lick at a dribble of Jungwoo's cum on his lips. To make matters even worse, the bed was rolling beneath you, making your head spin. 

Jungwoo pulled his shirt off before he sat down behind you. Meanwhile, Doyoung moved down your body, parting your legs. He prompted you to sit up, resting your back against his chest. He pressed a kiss to your earlobe as Doyoung peeled your underwear off of you, biting his lip at the sight of your drooling pussy. 

"You're absolutely drenched, princess. And all from sucking our cocks, huh?"

You nodded, eyes fluttering shut as Jungwoo's lips began kissing along your jaw. When you didn't say anything, Jungwoo pinched your sides gently. "Use your words, doll," He whispered. From behind you, his eyes met Doyoung's. "You're gonna keep being our good little girl, right?"

"Y-yes, Jungwoo." Your hand lifted itself to press against his cheek, a silent plea for more kisses. He smiled against your skin. 

"Atta girl," He praised, "On your best behavior for us tonight, huh?" 

"The little slut's just being good because she wants to get fucked, Woo. Don't get it twisted." 

"Please, Doie," You pleaded at the mention of being fucked, "Need it."

The older man chuckled lowly, pressing the pad of his thumb to your clit. 

"Told you."

His tongue pressed itself against your hole, and you immediately cried out. You would have immediately started grinding against Doyoung's face if it weren't for Jungwoo's hands on your hips, holding you down and keeping it still. 

"I don't think you wanna do that," He murmured. His hands travelled underneath your skirt, gripping the silvery blue gossamer as he tried to lift it up. You did your best to keep your squirming at a minimum as you tried to help him get you out of it. Finally, the bell sleeves were pulled off, and you were left naked as the day you were born.

Jungwoo’s hands moved to your breasts, playing with them as he watched you whimper at the sensation of Doyoung’s mouth working at your folds. When he slipped his tongue inside, you keened, head falling against Jungwoo’s shoulder. 

“You’re so pretty like this,” He whispered. 

Your chest heaved, squirming up and down as he began to tug and pinch your nipples, calloused fingertips making you cry out.

Doyoung’s free hand gripped your thigh, and his fingers on the other hand slipped inside when he pulled his tongue out. Immediately, he plunged in two fingers, curling his fingers as he attempted to search for that one special spot.

"Ngh, Doie, faster, pleasepleaseplease." Your legs were trembling slightly now. 

"So fucking slutty," Doyoung mumbled, chuckling wickedly, "And all I had to do was stick my fingers inside." 

He complied with no protest, and the sensation of Doyoung stroking your walls and Jungwoo continuously pawing at your breasts caused a string of moans to come pouring out of your mouth. Jungwoo had been sucking a bruise into your clavicle, but leaned up to press his lips against yours. 

"Don't want anyone hearing what's meant for Doie and I," He said, lips brushing yours. 

The idea made you even needier, the double entendre making your head spin. Jungwoo didn't want anyone to hear you because if they did, rumors would spread. And on top of that? He didn't want anyone to hear. You were theirs. They were yours. This was a sacred ritual between bodies meant to be witnessed by only the three of you.

Your head felt like you were floating, even though your limbs felt like they were sinking into the watery mattress. A coil began to tighten in your stomach, and your soft whines, muffled by Jungwoo's plush lips, increased in pitch. 

They both knew what this meant, because a second later, Doyoung removed his fingers from your core, and Jungwoo pulled away, his hands moving from your breasts to rest on Doyoung's atop your hips. You were left reeling and breathing heavily, that familiar sensation floating away.

When you looked down at Doyoung, you swallowed at the sight of his lips, chin and fingers, all glistening with your wetness.

He lifted himself up off the mattress, and proceeded to sandwich your chest in between his own chest and Jungwoo’s back. He gripped his dick, rubbing it against your folds, which were now even more soaked than before.

"Tell me how much you want it, princess." He pressed his forehead against yours, hissing when the tip caught your clit. You let out a desperate whine, clinging to his broad shoulders. 

"Do—Doyoung, please fuck me," You begged, reeling at the sensation. He was so close, all he had to do was slide in. But he refused.

"Not good enough," He insisted.

"Doyoung, don't be mean," Jungwoo said, but he seemed to be more amused by your desperation than anything.

"No, I wanna hear how much she needs us."

You closed your eyes and took a few deep breaths, trying to gather your words. Jungwoo's hands stroked your sides, trying to calm you down. "You doing alright, doll? You wanna take a breather?"

"We can always stop." Doyoung's voice had turned stable, secure, safe. He started pulling away, until you grabbed him by the forearm and shook your head. You opened your eyes, seeing concern in his eyes

“No,” You mumbled, “Jus’ want some water. Think there’s some in the minibar. ‘M really hot.”

Doyoung nodded, getting up and striding over to the small refrigerator on the other side of the room. He pulled out a water bottle, and popped open the cap before passing it to you. Jungwoo had taken to fanning your face lightly with his hand. You took several long swigs of water, before setting it on the nightstand.

“I’m fine,” You promised. “Can we please keep going? I can take it.”

Doyoung pressed a kiss to your temple. “Are you absolutely sure?”

“Yeah,” You said with a nod. 

“Doyoung,” Jungwoo murmured, “Be careful.”

“I know, baby." He lowered his eyes to study your face. "I won’t go that hard on you, Y/N.”

You nodded, even though deep down you wanted to protest. You knew that this was probably the best route to take. You could already feel the high—from the weed and the concert—wearing off. You knew that if Doyoung were too rough you’d probably crash on the way down instead of float.

So, Jungwoo brushed some stray hair out of your sweaty face, and Doyoung grabbed your legs gently, wrapping them around his hips. Slowly, Doyoung eased in, and you sighed in satisfaction of finally being filled. He bit into your shoulder, taking deep heaving breaths as he let you get used to the sensation. Jungwoo took turns pressing kisses to the top of your head and the top of Doyoung’s head. 

“I love you both so much,” He whispered, “I’m so grateful the universe brought us together.” 

Doyoung looked up at him, pressing a kiss to his lips. “My baby,” He murmured against Jungwoo’s lips. He then turned to you and did the same, “My princess.”

You smiled at their words, but the need in your core was becoming unbearable. "Doie, Woo, I love you both so much," You murmured, "But Doyoung, if you don't move I'll pin you down and do it myself."

"And you were doing so well," Doyoung groaned with a laugh, before beginning to thrust his hips. It was a slow, torturous glide, and the way it caused the bed to rock left you dizzy in the best possible way. Doyoung was panting into your ear like some sort of beast, and you were whining softly with every cant of his hips.

"You must feel so good right now, huh, doll?" 

"Jung—woo," You moaned, clawing at his bicep.

"I know, dolly, I know." He sounded sympathetic enough, but the way he was grinding his dick against your ass suggested otherwise. "Bunny boy is just so good with those hips of his, hm?"

"H-he is!" You cried, "Feel so full, ah, Doyoung!" 

Doyoung's eyes met yours, and his hips picked up their pace, until your eyes rolled up into your head. Your head thrashed side to side, leaning against Jungwoo's shoulder. His mouth lowered once again to kiss at your neck, and your hand wrapped itself against his nape, while the other gripped Doyoung's shoulders.

Jungwoo's hands slithered down to where you and Doyoung were connected, and started rubbing at your clit. You shrieked, chest arching. Doyoung hissed. "Shit, do that again," He bit out, "Fuck, princess you just got so tight."

"D-Doie, harder!" 

Doyoung looked up at Jungwoo, the two having an unspoken conversation. A second later, Jungwoo gave a cautious nod. Doyoung smiled, before he adjusted his legs. Then…

Then. He began pounding into you at a breakneck pace. Your legs tightened around him, wanting him even deeper than before. 

"You love this, don't you? Our pretty little slut." His voice was tighter now, panting with exertion. You nodded. 

"Yes, yes! I'm your slut!" 

Doyoung grinned, before locking lips with you. His tongue dipped into your mouth, before letting you do the same to him. You could tell he was starting to feel something—he always kissed you or Jungwoo as a way of telling you he wouldn't last much longer. 

Truthfully, you could feel it coming too—your body felt like it was on fire, and your hips couldn't stop squirming. Whether it was towards Jungwoo's calloused fingers on your clit, Doyoung's cock, or away from both, you couldn't tell. Your moans were getting shriller too.

You clenched down on his length again, and he grit his teeth, grunting as his pace turned sloppy.

"C-c'mon, princey," You pleaded, "Give it to me, give it…"

"Shit, yes…" His head lolled onto your shoulder. "Gonna stuff you so full, princess, you'll be dripping—"

"Please! Oh, please—"

The two of you fell apart almost at the same time, your orgasm triggering Doyoung's a second later. Your mouth fell open, legs trembling and heart pounding as waves crashed over and under you.

When you came down, Doyoung rolled off of you, turning onto his side to watch you and Jungwoo. Jungwoo, who ceased the movements of his hands and slowly laid you down. Your head landed against the pillows, and you let your eyes shut as you caught your breath. 

"Can I take care of you one last time, doll?" You heard Jungwoo say. Your eyes opened blearily, and you reached a hand out towards him, legs parting of their own accord.

Both of your lovers groaned at the sight of your pussy, Doyoung's cum brimming from your folds. 

"Absolute perfection," Jungwoo murmured, crawling between your legs. He gripped his dick with one hand, the other swiping through your folds, and you immediately whined at the sensitivity there, teetering the fine line between pleasure and pain.

"Please," You whimpered, "Woo, I want it."

"You're insatiable." He sounded so affectionate, so in love. You watched as his eyes studied his index and middle fingers, covered in a mix of Doyoung's cum and yours, before dipping them into his mouth to lick them clean. You sighed, a dopey smile gracing your features. He lowered himself down to brush noses with you, dark eyes blown wide, wide awake despite the dark circles underneath.

"Guess I'll just have to do something about that."

He slid in as if he was coming home, immediately setting a solid pace that had you seeing stars, arms wrapping around his shoulders to lock hands at his nape. The sensitivity left you pliant in his arms, and Jungwoo didn't hesitate in cradling you in his arms.

"So good for us, Y/N. Always Doie and I's sweet girl." 

You nodded, tears brimming at your eyes at the heaviness in your chest, the pulsing in your core. His hair was falling into his eyes, and you lifted your hands to his face, doing your best to brush it away. Your hands cupped his cheeks, heavy eyes burning into his. Your hips were rutting against his desperately now, wanting nothing more than to feel that high with him.

Jungwoo pressed a brief kiss to your neck, feeling something simmer in his gut embarrassingly fast. 

Doyoung placed his head next to yours, gently lifting Jungwoo's head to kiss him, hand brushing the other man's ass. When he pulled away, he kissed you as well, and Jungwoo's mouth pressed itself to one of your nipples. You keened against Doyoung's mouth, hips losing all semblance of grace.

Here, you were needy, animalistic, running on instincts, and your boys were drinking it up like water from a desert oasis. 

Doyoung pulled away, a thin trail of spit connecting his lips to yours. His hands cradled your head.

"Can you feel it yet, princess?"

Your eyebrows furrowed, silent moans falling from your lips. "Ah, yeah, Doie… s-so close…"

"Me too," Jungwoo groaned between your breasts, "So wet, Y/N…"

"That's from all the cum she's filled with, right, princess?"

You nodded. "Mm—ngh! Stuffed me so good, Doie." 

"Yeah? You gonna let Jungwoo fill you up even more? Gonna keep it all inside, right?"

Your stomach did a backflip, and you felt your toes curl. "Yes, yes, yes, yes, I want it—"

"I'll give it to you, doll," Jungwoo growled, "It's all—fuck—all yours. S-same way this is all for us, right?"

Those words were what caused you to finally fall over the edge. Your high was so intense that you could have sworn that your ears popped—clawing at Jungwoo’s shoulders, your eyes squeezed shut. Only one side ended up scratched, since you always kept your right hand nails short to properly play guitar. You sobbed against Doyoung’s lips, and he eagerly swallowed up your cries, shushing you gently as you came back down.

You didn't feel Jungwoo come inside, but you felt it immediately afterwards—the satisfying stickiness, the warmth in your stomach. 

You looked at Jungwoo, pressing a soft kiss to his sweaty forehead before prompting him to move off. He wrapped his arm around you, pulling you towards him as his little spoon, peppering kisses to your cheek and whispering how good you were. The two of you looked at Doyoung. You reached out, making grabby hands at him. His eyes were drooping, and he was blinking blearily as if he were trying to fight off sleep.

Still, he got up and pulled his pack of cigarettes out of his shirt pocket, as well as his lighter. As he sat back down on the bed, the waves sent you and Jungwoo further and further into the recesses of slumber. As consciousness left you, you caught Doyoung looking down at the two of you as if you were the most precious beings he'd ever encountered. His tone was low and grumbly, but there was a glint of smug satisfaction in his eye.

"I hope you two are happy. I can't remember those goddamn lyrics anymore." 

[automatismoateo]

(Update) My(m18) Parents yelled at me because I don't want a graduation party at my house during Covid, so they're gonna invite 40+ people from church instead via /r/atheism

Submitted April 20, 2021 at 03:57AM by Throaramagazine (Via reddit https://ift.tt/3dzh6Sc) (Update) My(m18) Parents yelled at me because I don't want a graduation party at my house during Covid, so they're gonna invite 40+ people from church instead

Hey guys. I wanna try to keep this shorter than last time, so I'll get straight to the point with some very brief recaps for anyone who didn't see the first post I made. I don't like celebrating myself (in parties), and that goes back for years. When I used to have birthday parties, my mom would tell me to invite whoever I wanted, but she would use these parties to "examine" my friends and later tell me which friends I'm allowed to keep and not keep, and I've lost many friends because of her over the years, all because she hates people who disagree with her decision to homeschool me. At the end of many parties, she would sit with me with a notebook of things that she jotted/overheard, and tell me a bunch of things that she didn't like because they were "worldly" (her favorite word), and she'll also nitpick at other things such as their language or the topic of their conversations, only to say that I'm no longer allowed to hang out with them at the end, and I've lost many friends because of her

She's forced me to cut off friends I met at sports (clubs) after talking with other parents and hearing an opinion she didn't like, saying that I'm not allowed to hit with them (I played tennis) simply because they have an opinion that is different than hers, and she's even insulted her extended family who disagree with her decision to homeschool me for 12 grades and stopped going to Thanksgiving with them because of their different opinion, the same way that she cuts off all of my friends and their parents from my life/childhood/early teen life when I was too young to do anything about it. The main reason my extended family disagree with her decision to homeschool, is because our great grandma walked with MLK, and they said that "choosing to homeschool us after everything he fought for, is a disgrace to what he fought for by allowing us to go into public schools"

Extended family has also gone as far as to say that that she is "not black" because she didn't vote for Obama in 2008 and 2012, something she says she didn't do because she accused them of "only voting for him because he was black and not because of his policies" because she believes that policies are more important and that actions can't be overlooked because of a race, but they didn't like that, and mom then cut them off in some ways

In 2016, she advertised to them that she was voting for Carson to get back on their good side per say, but after he exited the running, she switched over to voting for the 45th, and extended family didn't really like that much either, and she would vote for him both times in 2016 and 2020, even going as far as to hang a 45th banner on our living room wall and outside of our home and buying us all hats that she wanted us to wear

I'm getting to the update, but I just want to add a few small things that I didn't last time, things that bothered me and made me think that I'm crazy or that there's something wrong with me when I was growing up, and then I'll get to the stuff that happened since my last post

Some more important details

Something I often struggle with, is wondering how smart I am, compared to others in my same grade, since a lot of my classes under her don't really seem like classes to me, and here's what I mean. A lot of the classes I had, were just simply agreeing with her opinion on politics and watching election speeches that she claimed "the news wouldn't show us because they were corrupt", along with purity as a substitute for sexual education

For purity, she used a book called "Passport to Purity", and it featured a bunch of cheesy songs and demonstrations like squeezing toothpaste out of a container to illustrate how once you get someone pregnant, you can't get it back, along with an example of a man walking closer to a cliff with footsteps, and each footstep being labeled with something like "level 1: holding hands, level 4: kissing, level 10 (off the cliff) intercourse) and other things like that that just made me feel really weird

When they talked about masturbation, they said that masturbating would "ruin your commitment to the future wife that God gave you", and they also told me that masturbating would make me lose my virginity because "sex is supposed to be between two people", and that did a number on me for a very long time. As mentioned last time, I was even ashamed of sleeping on my di__ and sleeping on my back, because the thought of any pleasure just made me feel like sh__, and they had this "alternate health class" with me on my 12th birthday, and I just felt humiliated and embarrased the entire time

Before we had the class, my dad invited his men's group from church to pray for me at my house about the things regarding sexual purity that they would teach, and I remember just feeling weird and very grossed out by the whole thing, something I later learned should be kept private (purity) instead of advertising it to people from a church, and one of the old men even drew a d__k on a piece of paper and tried to illustrate how it got "harder" which was just weird and told me to "think about something else" whenever that happened. And whenever my mom would find remains of me trying to masturbate in the months after the purity talk (usually from her doing my laundry or searching my room without telling me, although she says she didn't have to because it's her house), she would get really angry and yell at me and call dad who was at work, and when he got back, he would yell at me too. We'd go into their room where they just yelled at me for hours on numerous occassions, and they'd make me reread the purity stuff until I just cried and just kept apologizing, something some people at work (when I was 18) said that I apologize way too much for everything including things I didn't do wrong, but I want to keep this moving, so I'll stop there for now. Masturbation just scared me a lot growing up, until I reached about 14 or 15 and just got better at hiding and finding online resources to learn more about it, but the worse moment of my life, were those nights of being yelled at and watching them cry because I was masturbating, to the point where I felt like I had really don't something wrong, when it was normal all along

I'll keep the rest short and sweet and to the point. Whenever I asked my mom why we weren't going to Thanksgiving or about how she was pressuring us to wear 45th attire, she would always tell me that "I'm not proud of being black" for some reason because I grew up playing tennis, what she calls "a white man's sport" and let it rub off on me too much... when in reality, she would slap me when I was younger for "talking like a black person" when she hated extended family, but now that she wants to appease them by saying "I planned to vote for Carson", she tells me that she wants me to "talk more in slang" which just seems fake and then she says that to me, but I'll leave it at that. My brothers starting to play basketball (something I was never really good at) as they entered their teen years (they were homeschooled too) maybe also sparked her change, but to me, I don't like her flip flop and then blaming it on me

As I've grown older and started to talk to my brothers about some of the things I've disagreed with (only for them to not believe me and often take their side), my mom would get angry, because it was the same as whenever someone had another opinion than her. So, she would start to put voice recorders around the home in various places; behind the DVR box, behind picture frames, etc... and then she would talk to us in her room and punish us for anything we said that she didn't like, and she also raised my door up from the ground too, in addition to standing outside of my room whenever I'm on the phone and sometimes with a voice recorder too, and whenever I wanted to go outside to talk to someone else away from her on the phone, she'd get angry and yell at me and ask "what I have to hide" and other stuff like that

The Update

I really needed to get that off my chest, to also give more background to why I don't like celebrating myself and having parties, but here's the update. I didn't want a graduation party because of past experiences of how she told me to invite friends as a trap to "evaluate" them and then cut them out of my life. So, when I told her that I didn't want a graduation party, she said that she was going to throw herself one instead, and invite our church's homeschool group (that we're in) instead to celebrate her and that I had to be there. Covid was another reason why I didn't want to have something at our home, but she's going to invite 40+ people anyway, and dad wants me to say a few words about her at "her celebration"

After my last post, I decided to talk to them again with some of the advice I had received, although a lot of it was around getting a full time job and getting out from under them, but I still wanted to try and talk to them anyway. I started my addressing the concerns about covid, but just like our church that's allowing 70 percent capacity (and the people are coming from our church), she said that she doesn't care and that they're "coming anyway" and that "covid was created by the Democrats to blame and use against the 45th in the election", and I didn't even try to reason with that one

I then told them that I didn't want to attend and didn't plan to attend either, and when dad asked me why, I told him how the only friend I have said that she is "abusive" and has been for her entire life, something I've told him before many times, and that he said that I can hang out with him instead and that it was selfish to make the day about her when I didn't even want to celebrate it myself, and I'm the one graduating

My dad got offended and told me that "he's tired of hearing me complain about my upbringing" and that "I should go talk to someone because I need help" and to "stop insulting mom", and he yelled that so loud at like 1am in the morning that I'm sure my brothers heard it, and it just killed me inside. He also told me that "there's something wrong with me" and that "I need mental help", and I can't stress enough how much I hate him because everything that's been said to me about being sheltered and "not up to speed" from others, have come as a result of them and their choice to homeschool me, and he yelled at me in front of everyone and said that there's something wrong with me, and I just can't take it anymore

Whenever I think of this party, it just makes me really angry, and whenever I have friends, they always try to turn me against them or, if I won't listen, insult their parents so that they won't bring their kids to hang out with me, and dad keeps asking "who are you listening to", and whenever I try to address their decision to homeschool, mom just gets so insulted and tries to reason with me about how she's right and the world is this and that

Back to the party, she said that I "don't have to live here" if I don't abide by their rules or "choose to be disrespectful", and by that I assume means not attending the party, and dad said that he would punish me "if I told him about anything else my friends said", and he's also banned numerous friends from our home over the years too. Mom also said that no one will be wearing masks at their home, and I don't even know what to do at this point, other than take the advice about preparing to move out, because they just make you think you're crazy, just like the masturbation stuff and guilt from many years, but I don't know how to skip it, since they're kinda threatening to kick me out if I don't go, and that's what I'm wondering now

​

TL;DR: I talked to my mom, but dad yelled at me and said that "there's something wrong with me" and that "I need mental help" for not agreeing with their decision to homeschool, and he's also threatening to maybe kick me out if I "continue to disobey and not be grateful", and mom said that there won't be any mask wearing at the party

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

William/Mark was ostracized the other night

Thats why the news about the non-rapes occurred in Oklahoma news because it was regionally broadcast that it occurred in 1999 by qE2

Before a longer story; I just want to say we understand. And no one blames you nor harbors ill will towards your prior belief of understanding.

I just hope you understand the truth and you welcome him in your community as he wishes to be. I further wish you understand he's a true hero and none of this would happened without him. But if youd like to treat him as a normal person no different than you, then thats great. It is what we prefer most because we want everyone to be treated like kings and queens.

He is my true soulmate and he has had to hide that from me and all that hoopla.

I and a previously legless Abu burned down the eQ2 Okmulgee & Oklahoma buildings she owned while he was in jail over a stolen bike that he did not steal.

Jennifer Landsberry had a clone as did William.

Like he's some planet needle like grass needs to grow on.

eQ2 was not quite able to perfect chest hair back then. It was always like a porcupine. She also didn't know how to not make it grow on clones. She could get the scientists to pick out the eggs without for humans but could never do clones.

Clones come from the prostate and sperm for men and for women, where girls wetness comes from and her ovaries. That's all I'll say. Because she did some crazy after that. And that's way too much information even if no one says they're gonna do that... Its been happening since the 70s but i figured it out in 1984 and 1986 then some one listened in 1994.

So Mark William knew he had a twin But not a clone... Nor did anyone know Jen was a clone. But she was. Then a Stephanie clone kept messing me up and kept me and Mark William apart for enough time for the qE2 to realize she could do more in her plans.

The whole William clone was a mess... He would beat Jen up and she would call me and he would hit her in front of me.

And a whole lot of shit.

And since my real man was in jail and the clones would constantly lie and covet for the qE2... I was lost. And so was all of Okmulgee.

So I came out here to New Mexico. And for the last 19 years I've lived like any lost Okmulgee person. In misery and Hell. Poverty and sadness. Alone but not lonely.

So, i understand believing lies. I wrote William only when I was getting married and pregnant but not after, just 2 baby pictures. Because then i got legally married.

Once after my divorce and told him not to write me if he wanted anything more than pen pals. So he did not respond.

In the last letter i wrote him how escaping jail (with his clone that was arrested for arson) was his choice but how all the cops knew Jen did drops and how the clone had a cell phone and called Jen everyday. And so in legal belief a jury of 10 would 100% decide without discussing that he should be set free. So he should demand a better prison and early release but not parole nor probation. Just release, by the time he was 30 or 40, his choice.

Look at that baby face. He was just a little lamb when they locked him in.

So I did check about 2 years later and he did indeed make two moves and was at a low security prison in 2014.

Alexis Dejoria and William LeGrande began exchanging emails in 2016.

She and Kim Kardashian got him permanently released this summer by paying cash for his release. Which then he turned around and demanded 2x the amount from qE2 and he paid them back exactly what they paid the queen.

He had to promise not to approach me until she was dead. Because i don't approach people or talk to people in like stores unless i see they need help making a purchase or reaching something. Then i offer advise if I know the topic or my arms if i can reach.

And I certainly wouldn't approached him not being aware of clones.

I only found out he was released 6 days ago but i have seen him all in my neighborhood walking around sucking on a lollipop.

Which made me always think "one of us is a sucker but Idk which one of us" because im so used to people following me for different reasons, rapists not wanting to get caught and hiring people to intimidate me, undercover law enforcement, hired hitmen, qE2 I know now, Abus, and all kinds. So I knew he was a follow but how or why i Didn't take my time on.

I would more focus on the times I saw them. I thought that was more important than as to why.

Eventually someone would try to kill me to my face or wouldn't. And if law enforcement did their job, i wouldn't even notice.

So that's why i would count so i could find out how they bypassed security to Kill me to my face. Just in case they did get that far.

So there's a whole ton of his clones under the bunker at my Uncle's. All ready to rip people apart at any time. Of course they're good clones so they have Armageddon protection on top of the qE2 so even Fire don't bother them.

His twin always has a yoyo. And William has always carried an old old yoyo string in his pocket. Until Declan lit it on fire (to prove he was human) after doing karate moves on it. In 2008.

He was fucking lit crazy trying to get the string while JJJR held him back with Matt's help. And I thought it was hilariously funny.

So Declans sub father bought a whole yoyo for William to get the string out of. And Declan made a string ring and bracelet for him.

And he was pleased but was not happy his string was murdered and burnt. So i held his hand although he tried to take it away like i allowed his string to be and I explained "I know how that was the link to your only family" and he wanted to prove his point in loud breath "now now you've proved your point you won't even give me your hand" he slid his hand closer to me but looked away pouty "or even look at me" he slid his eyeball to the corner "now thats better." He wiggled his fingers of his hand i didn't touch "oh now you want me to hold it?!?!" He nodded so I held his fingers "I know how that wa the only link to your family" and he yanked away his hand and turned away to pout. Then sighed and reached deep into his other pocket

"I had two! One for me and one for him!"

"Oh forget it! Now my speech is ruined!"

"Uh no! Im not! Give me the other yoyo!" Said Declan "the other yoyo! I need it! So you can match don't worry about it"

"But I needed two to prove it was -- wait finish your story i bet it was magic..."

"What? Oh. Well Declan burned it for proof you're not a clone, you know after he... Killed it... And So what I was going to continue to say. Honey are you even listening?"

"Shh" he told Declan "let her finish"

"I can't. I need to see little Declans face when i finish, now that you mention it."

"No You don't! I'll be fine!!!"

"Then you'll need a tissue I'll be right back" Declan always turns so no one sees him crying. Just like I do

"Okay as i was saying. Now you have a new family. With us and with--"

His mouth dropped open and he jumped up and ran from where he moved to let Declan size the jewelry to where I stood after dropping his tissue for him on his back like a half sash like George of the Jungle

"I knew it!! I knew it!! That's what he was just saying too!! He said Annie had told him when they were in the room. He wanted to know why you were laughing and why you were happy when he did something bad thats why he made the ring for me! Why do you look so ... Do you want to finish?!? Here measure me!"

"Dec..lan!"

"Oh thank God. I needed that. Wait. I got snot"

"Why do you look so... What? Is it shock??"

"Uh huh" i sunk into the couch and began to cry droplets of tears like rain

"Honey! What's wrong?!"

"Nothing! Every thing is just perfect!!"

Declan gasped and jumped up from his squatted position and gsve me a hug and kiss on the cheek "thanks. I needed that!"

.... See i had been dealing with clones for a few years and a bunch of Declans dad's clones and twins so I was used to people looking familiar. He told me his name was Mark. So I didn't ever realize I was talking to William LeGrande.

He went by Mark because they did like CIA codes to escape. You didn't want to miss your "mark" in their Harriet Tubman land.

And he didn't sleep in my bed.

But I felt more comfortable with him than I did with anyone in my life. Only a bit more than my daughter. Tiny almost unnoticeable amount.

*Declan's soulmate was murdered by an evil clone for punishment for being independent. So Declan's independent ass told me. So I told him i would give him a soulmate because we were both similar thinkers. When he asked. So William got a free pass out and a "regrowth" which they used an injection for. And we made my kid. But inwas drugged then on Xanax so.