#it's good for eris to occasionally see she's not the boss of everyone

[kedreeva]

Something I find exceptionally funny is that the birds in my barn pen speak a different language than the birds in my first pen.

I let Eris (pen 1) into the barn pen today, and of course she's an asshole that started a battle royale immediately upon entering. just as she had three birds closing in on her on a perch and three birds circling beneath her like sharks, I trilled the "HAWK!!!" warning the barn pen birds use, and immediately every single barn pen bird BOLTED for the inside of the barn. But Eris, who does not speak Barn Pen, was left standing on the perch alone and confused. I was able to simply close the barn coop door, escort Eris out of the flight pen, and release all the barn pen birds back into their flight area without her.

Eris is also the only bird who learned "go around" means she has to walk to the back of the pen 2 to go through the door to get to pen 1's front door, if she wants out. Everyone else tries to teleport themselves through the wire at the front of pen 2. To be fair, so does Eris, until I tell her to go around and then she turns and goes the right way. Which might lead me to assume that Eris doesn't recognize "hawk" in peafowl because she was originally trained in buttons and human speech.

However, when I escorted her back to her pen, despite very much being able to hear me warn for a hawk, all of her pen-mates in pen 1 were still out and about like nothing was wrong. They hadn't been bothered by the barn pen hawk call, either.

[separatist-apologist]

For the ship thing: Elriel, Gwynriel and Azriel x his one sided love obsession for Mor?

I went on a 4 mile hike, can't wait for the hate that's coming for me after answering this. Let's start with Moriel.

MORIEL: Honestly? Kind of good? It's not GREAT but when we meet Az and Mor it reads sort of like, they're both in love with each other but Mor isn't ready for the foreverness of Az. He wants to settle down, a house in the mountains, 2.5 kids and Mor is nervous. Her family life was scary, what if he's going to replicate that? And Az is content to wait, certain a mating bond is going to snap for them. I didn't hate it. It's very SJM of the dude wanting his girl and willing to wait on her.

And then the RETCON, which I'm sorry but was done BADLY. Now we're told the court of dreamers is a topsy-turvy nightmare in which a queer woman has to hide her sexuality from her supposed best friends to escape the angriest dude in the group. and EVERYONE knows hes in love with her but...won't do anything about it?

And how do we get obsessive, creepy Az over Mor and ready for a forever LI? By making him possessive and obsessive over Elain. Yes. I'm sorry, but if you cant see the Moriel-E/riel-Gwynriel pipeline thats happening in these books, bummer but its there. Elain is literally the "moving on" girl. He's not in love with her but he is interested. She's hot, he's hot....some of ya'll have never experienced that dynamic. We were in his head, man is MAD about his rejections.

E/riel, which I will not tag because they can't handle even good-natured criticism (and please note, EVERYONE is getting roasted here before you come in my ask box mad) is literally watered down Feysand. Take everything interesting about Feysand, dilute it and congrats you've got E/riel. The most compelling thing about the ship is they might break the bond and every theory centers around them being mates like okay I guess?

Literally no change/growth happens between these two over three books. ACOSF Az tells us they don't TALK? only brush fingers occasionally? Rhys is like, "leave her alone!" and Az could have said "BUT DAD I LOVE HER" and instead...did what he was told to do. They're absurdly boring- he gets to boss her around and she gets to hide in the shadows. No change, no growth, no conversation. He speaks for her even when she so clearly has done it for herself. What does he know about her? That she likes to garden? Man is masturbating to a tylenol bottle and I keep getting told that sexy, I promise its not.

"He saved her life-" he's saved everyones life. Mor, Gwyn, Feyre, Elain, like my man has a HERO COMPLEX because he doesn't think his life is worth much, and goes running face first into murder, unconcerned if it'll hurt him. I think its telling the biggest shippers want an off-scream romance between them...which SJM has never written and never will write. All her heroines start at a place of apathy, antagonism, or outright hatred before falling in love (HELLO ROWAN). Queen of healthy, soft romances she is not.

And Gwynriel. Theres not a lot for them, imo. It's better than Mor/Elain. Gwyn and Az already have a dynamic (he's apparently privately dagger training her, v interesting). the best thing they have going for them is they're equals. He can't speak for Gwyn because he's spent the last year teaching her how to beat his ass. He respects her enough to do things on her own, at her own pace. She gave him shit and pulled him out of his ugly mood on Solstice, which is apparently hard to do. I think of all the romances for him that aren't Eris, Gwyn is certainly the most interesting (assuming it doesn't go the Nessian route).

That regifted necklace is not a good look and I PRAY I never hear another word again about it. Literally HATE that.

[bedtimebrain]

EXO Baekhyun: Cry for Love Part 1

Boldly writing this very unlikely scenario about baek. Part of me just feels like there might be a part of baek that might be in such a situation if he ever feels so deeply for someone that is not be able to handle the stress of dating an idol.

Using the song title of one of my favourite songs from his latest album for this~ there’s going to be 2 parts(hopefully not 3), and just a disclaimer the ending might not be fluff, so don’t get started if you’re not prepared !

Edit: Part 2 is up! (No part 3 tho, thankfull)

Part 2

Characters: Baek x You

Baekhyun finds himself falling for you, but feels he cannot be so selfish to put the burdens of dating an idol upon you. In an attempt to control his feelings, he tries to stay away from you

Standing across the narrow road opposite to Wendy Cafe, Baekhyun looked intently inside, with a sort of sourness at the back of his throat. This is at least 5th time this guy has been here, and it’s been the second time this week already. His inner self was literally scowling at that thought, but what could he do?

His phone that vibrated in his pocket called him out of his thoughts. It was a call from his manager, asking him to return to the SM building.

Taking one last look at you, at the guy, and at the cafe, he placed both his hands back in his pocket, head facing down and walked back to where his car was.

During the ride back, he thought long and hard, was this the right thing to do?  Just 4 months ago, was the first step into the cafe the beginning to this unwanted path ?

He can’t help but replay once again all that started 4 months ago...

——

‘Bye! See you next week!’

Ending his gym session for the week, baekhyun headed for the carpark, eager to get there quickly. Today, he was to be home for a family dinner.

He had been up till late yesterday, practicing and preparing for EXO’s new album. With just 4hours of sleep, his ruined body clock woke him up in time for a gym session in the afternoon. Beating himself to be disciplined so that he can show his best image to Eris during the comeback, he got himself to the gym. 

But now, the sweat from the gym session coupled with his sleep debt, was making him feel extra sleepy.

Needing some caffeine in his system, he stopped his car by the roadside to search up coffee houses nearby. Scrolling through, Starbucks -too crowded , dal.kom- he was not a fan , Daebak Coffee and Tea - seems very popular among reviews, Wendy Cafe - no reviews.

Feeling it’s best to avoid crowded cafes on a Friday afternoon, he decided to give Wendy Cafe a try. Following the voice of Google maps, he found himself along a narrow road, secluded and outcasted from the bustling roads just 2 minutes ago.

‘Am I at the right place? Why would someone open a cafe here?’ He loudly spoke in a typical monologue with himself

Just as he was about to give up, a small signboard peeked out from the brick wall stretching along the road.

‘Ah yes, found you! I hope I didn’t make the wrong choice’

After parking his car, he crossed the road to the cafe.

Wendy’s Cafe was clad in wood and white, wooden tables, white chairs, surrounded by grey walls. It was so small only about 6 people could be seated by the tables. To make up for it, a counter-side table was made available and soft music played in the background. Walking in, Baekhyun felt a comfortable sense of peace and relax.

‘Hello, 1 Ice Americano please’

‘Hello, that will be $5.. omo’ Just as you looked up at him, you were shocked to recognise him as Baekhyun from EXO. But you quickly recovered in time, taking the money from him and continued your chores.

Seeing that you have recognised him, he nodded politely. He appreciated your politeness and professionalism to not overreact. And proceed to wait patiently for his coffee.

‘Thank you, have a nice day’ you smiled brightly at him and handed the coffee over.

Just then, it started pouring heavily outside, stopping Baekhyun in his tracks.

‘Should I drive back now ? It’s a long journey back and it’s raining so heavily ...’ he thought

‘Do you want to wait out the rain instead? It’s not too safe to drive in such heavy rain. No one comes here on rainy days, I can put out the close sign for you if you like’ 

You asked rather sincerely 

Looking out again at the rain, he weighed his choices. He was going to be drenched if he crossed the road but what if you were one of those fans that would expose where he was to everyone? 

He was feeling a little suspicious inside, afterall why would you close the shop to business just for him?

‘You can take the table furthest away from the window if you’re worried’

He looked at you, judging a book by it’s cover. And decided it doesn’t appear like you would turn out to be one of those crazy fans and took the option of waiting out the rain. 

His phone was running out of battery, so instead of sitting by the corner table all bored and lonely, Baekhyun sat on the bar counter table instead; facing you and the other male employee who were busy with fresh bakes.

You presented a bite size muffin on a white plate and gave it over to him. ‘It’s on the house, we’re not going to have any more customers anyway’

Being curious since the start, he asked ‘why would your boss open a cafe right here? It’s really not the best location to be attracting people right?’

Laughing slightly, you replied

‘My boss? That would be me, and does this cafe look like I want to attract people in? The tables are all for 2s, I’m just encouraging solitude here’

‘You own this place? Wow I would suppose you’re only in your early 20s right? Anyway this place does give a sense of quietness that we dont quite get outside. I like it’ He lively replied

‘Yeah, I just wanted people that come by to be able to stop and find quietness they don’t get anywhere else. Finding time for themselves to be away from noisy city life just a few minutes away’

Not really having anything to say to that deep thought of yours, he simply replied ‘Ahh... I see. Uh, thanks for muffin, it smells tasty’

You smiled politely and left him to himself as you cleaned up the open kitchen.

The rain that was beating the ground outside was almost like a lullaby to Baekhyun. The warmth of the shop and the music aided the rain and drowsy effects he was having, shortly without knowing, he drifted to sleep. --

‘Baekhyun ssi, Baekhyun ssi’ you tapped him lightly till he woke up

‘It stopped raining, do you want to head off’

‘Oh my , can’t believe I slept, but that was certainly the quietness I need, haha. I’ll be leaving. Thank you for the coffee’

As he left, he thought to himself that he will surely be back.

—

A week later, he came back. On that day, he saw from outside that you were casually sitting down by on of the tables, chatting with a middle age office lady.

Opening the door, he caught your attention and you smiled slightly to acknowledge. As you were the only working employee today, you got up from the table to serve him.

‘Hi Baekhyun ssi, I see you’re back. Ice americano for you? Or would you like to try something else? Wendy’s special for a bright sunny day’

‘Sure I’ll go for the Wendy’s special’

Handing over the coffee to baekhyun, you asked

‘I heard EXO’s preparing for a comeback. How’s it going for you?’

‘Did you search up on EXO after you saw me last week? Hahaha. Anyway it’s fine, it’s just the discipline in diet, exercise and health that’s annoying’

‘I see. And nah, don’t make me sound like a stalker fan please. I just moderately keep up with kpop in general’

‘Anyway is the middle age lady there your friend? Or do you just chat with your customers all the time?’

‘Oh, she’s just a customer. Really depends though, some people come here seeming to have heavy thoughts, sometimes when I notice I’ll just casually chat with them. Some others are here really putting up a do not disturb sign. Those I wouldn’t bother’

Being cheeky, Baekhyun asked ‘what about me?’

You thought for a while before answering

‘Like a cat? Like those I would give some affection to before letting them run off so they don’t start scratching me. I mean not saying you would be aggressive, but rather, I’m sure a good balance of chat and quietness would be best for you’

Raising his brows and thinking through what you just said, he smiled after a while and went on sipping his Wendy’s special by the counter again. Occasionally, he would look up from his phone to chat with you.

—-

For that 1 month, it seems like he started developing a routine to drop by your cafe for short breaks. He enjoyed your company and somehow your cafe seemed like a place of comfort and refuge. With you, he could talk about anything, from the laughters to the deep insides. Over there, the burdens of being an idol is always momentarily lifted.

On the first week of the 2nd month you guys met. He dropped by again, only to find that the lights were off. A little surprised, he went up to the door which pasted a notice

‘the shop will be closed till further notice due to the owner’s personal reasons. Sorry for any inconvenience caused’

His regular high spirits whenever he came by was dampened as he read the notice. Turning back, he headed off.

The next two weeks, he drove by repeatedly, at least 2 times a week, but your shop was still closed.

It made him a little worried, did something happen to you? But seeing how you left this shop behind with just a notice also made him feel a little down, strangely. It made him think that was he nothing but just a customer to you? He had thought you guys were friends, friends with a special bond, one who he could tell everything to, and place so comfortable almost like his home sofa. But the sign that hung coolly by the cafe’s door left no sign of that friendship held.

Whenever he wasn’t working or was by himself, he pondered over what happened to you. Looking at his phone, he suddenly felt a disconnect. You both knew so many things bout each other but not each other’s numbers. There was nothing to call to reach you. Wherever you are, were you thinking about what you left behind?

He thought to himself 

let’s not be too invested into this coincidental friendship

He made up his mind, tomorrow he was going to make a final intentional trip down. If you were still closed, he told himself he would never drop by intentionally again just to check if you were open.

—-

Driving by the next day, his heart was beating fast. And was as if the heavens heard his words, the lights of your cafe were on.

The sign outside still hung closed, but he walked briskly over and stood by the door. You saw him and beckoned him inside.

‘Hey! What’s up with you? Where did you go? ’ Within him he heaved a sigh of relief, finally seeing you again. But his heart wouldn’t stop racing as he waited for your answer. Looking at your face, he can’t help but notice you’ve lost some weight, making him a little worried.

‘Hey Baekhyun ssi, it’s nice seeing you again’

You smiled at him your normal smile and there was no hint of anything extra apart from the normal customer service you gave him. Your lukewarm reply bothered him a little, was he the only one who considered you both as friends? That thought came but left quickly

‘I went home to visit my parents, unfortunately I fell ill. Pneumonia.. Got me in bed for a really long time’

‘Oh no, no wonder you lost some weight? I hope you’re feeling much better already. But you’re not opened today?’

‘Yes I just came back to tidy up this place.’

Not really wanting to leave yet, he offered to clean the place for you, also worried you might not be feeling the most recovered yet.

‘Do you want to have dinner together tonight?’ Baekhyun asked on impulse.

You looked up, a little surprise, but didn’t reject it. 

‘Probably not at restaurants or something though. Delivery , do you mind?’ He added

You were never someone who seemed bothered about such trivial things, as expected you agreed.

Over dinner Baekhyun was his chirpy self again, telling you about all he wanted to say the few weeks you guys didn’t met. You listened to him without much words, only saying words when it mattered, as usual.

As you guys were eating and chatting, there came a point where a comfortable silence settled between you both.

Till you broke it

‘Baekhyun ssi, can I share something with you?’

Though he wasn’t expecting this, he was ready to listen.

‘Go ahead’

‘When I went back, I found out my one and only best friend had died in a car accident. And no one told me because they were afraid I wouldn’t be able to handle it alone in Seoul. He.. was all I had.. when I was bullied because people thought I was weird... when I didn’t fit in... he.. he..’ you couldn’t continue as you burst into uncontrollable tears.

Handling such situations was definitely not something Baekhyun was most comfortable with. Catching him off guard, he internally panicked, Omo, what do I do. What should I say? Deciding the only appropriate thing to do was to pat your back or your head. He reached out and gently comfort you, feeling a little awkward.

After a good 3 minutes you finally calmed down. But still, Baekhyun didn’t exactly know what to say to a crying girl

‘Are you feeling better? Care for some BingBing now? Ice cream cannot solve your problems, but it’s sweet at least ’

You managed a laugh, and Baekhyun went to the kitchen fridge to pull out the ice cream that came with the dinner earlier.

On the drive home, Baekhyun decided that sometimes a friend is the ultimate remedy to sorrow. And as much as you have been there to hear him out, he wanted to pay it back to you too. 

——

But slowly, their comeback preparations were getting more and more hectic. He no longer had the liberty of time to plan what he wanted to do. But today, there was a short 2 hour interval of free time and they were free to do whatever they wanted.

Deciding between whether to crash at dance practice room or to head to your cafe, he decided to do the latter instead. Though he was feeling rather tired, it has been at least 3 weeks since he came by to say hi. He left after telling suho he’ll be back swiftly.

—

Reaching your cafe, he was surprised to see you smiling and laughing so heartily as you were chatting by the counter with a fashionable young man. When you both spoke, you were always giving him polite smiles and laughters, somewhat out of manners? It somehow hurt his pride a little that while he still thought about you when he was away, did you just think of him as a normal customer who would just come and go? It made him feel like his spot in the cafe was easily replaceable.

As he entered, you did not even break away from the conversation you have with the young man. Only until he reached the counter did you look up.

‘Ah! It’s you! It’s been really long! What would you like today ?’

‘6 Iced americanos, thank you’

‘Alright you can take a seat at the corner table first’ handing him his change , you pointed him to the one at the furthest end of the shop.

He came by having the intention to have a short catch up with you, but apart from the exchange of greetings you had pointed him so far away from the counter and busily went off to prepare the amercianos as if he really was just another customer. He laughed a little bitterly and went to sit where you told him to.

When you were done, you brought the coffee to him and dropped to a whisper suddenly.

‘Baekhyun ssi, are you doing well? Sorry I had to cut our conversation short at the counter because of the oppa sitting there. Didn’t want to bring you trouble in case I accidentally say your name’

Smacking himself on the head internally for being so sensitive earlier on, inside of him also wondered what kind of magic does that ‘oppa’ have for you to be so comfortable? The friendship has almost been 3 months but there always seem to be a strange distance between the both of you. Baekhyun knew himself that his personally was not one people found hard to warm up to and neither did he take very long to warm up to others. He was confused, how sometimes your friendship felt so close yet sometimes so far.

‘How have you been? That guy’s your new customer friend?’

‘Not too bad, I started attending some baking classes and in my free time now I just read as usual. Nothing much as changed.

Yeh he’s been coming quite often because he’s back in this area to visit his parents and there’s nothing for him to do’

‘Ahhhh so what kind of customer is he?’ He arrowhead his eyes at him then back to you.

Laughing you replied ‘ just a really funny and nonsensical kind. Kind of just reminds me of my childhood friend I told you about.... oh right, there’s something I want to give you’

Rushing to the kitchen then quickly walking out, you handed him a box. You explained

‘Baekhyun ssi that day I was at a mall and i walked by this tea shop and I dont know why,I thought about you. It’s all without caffeine. I know you’re having your comeback now and you should be really busy. I purposely picked out some that would help you sleep, some that would revitalise you and just some others that could just help you relax.

I’ve kept it for so long but you didn’t come by again. I almost just kept it for myself already.. anyway I’m glad you’re here today so I could pass it to you’

Hearing this from you really made him touched on the inside, but on the outside he didn’t really know let those emotions show. Instead, he merely said

‘Thanks y/n ssi , for thinking about me. I’ll use them well.’ Looking at his watch , he added,

‘I got to go now, see you sometime soon!’

After saying the goodbyes, Baekhyun returned to his car. Setting his Americanos aside, he held the gift in his hand and looked through his driver’s window at you.

At that very moment he finally came to terms with his feelings.

He did not just want a friendship with you, he wanted you as a partner he could tell his everything to, someone that belonged to him and someone he belonged to.

This should make him feel happy and elated, warm and fuzzy. But there was discomfort lying in his heart.

Deep down he knew that desiring anything more than a friendship with you was putting chains on you.

You liked quietness and freedom. But in his world, parts of his life are made public and his freedom was not really freedom at all.

He cannot sink deeper into this, but could he stay away ? His heart clenched.

He tossed the gift aside and drove off.

—

To be continued!!

Sorry for stopping at such an awkward place, but I couldn’t find a good place to stop this at, hahaha.

Anw, I’m sure you guys already know bout baek’s medical condition? My respect and love for baek just hit another level. I really think we are such lucky fangirls to be stanning someone like him. The effort he puts in for us is above and beyond what is required. Sigh. Baek I hope you know we really appreciate you💛

Tag(s): @wooya1224

Edit: Part 2