#it's fineeee at least i'm so close to the end that i can just start anew | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mrsriddles-blog · 9 months ago

Text

bad idea right? | L.B

Pairing: Slytherin Fem Reader X Lorenzo Berkshire

WC: 6k

Warnings/Notes: Mild language, heartbreak, angst, fluff, smut, alcohol, trust issues…

Summary: After your painful breakup with Lorenzo, it seems that he has regrets and he’s not ready to let you go. But, you’re unsure if he can be trusted once more.

Hey

Haven't heard from you in a couple of months

But I'm out right now, and I'm all fucked up

And you're callin' my phone, you're all alone

And I'm sensin' some undertone

"Come onnnn! You need to let loose and have some fun." Pansy whines.

She had been trying to convince you for about an hour to come on the dance floor and dance with her, but you weren't quite sure how you felt about that. Granted, it had been months since you and Enzo broke up, but you'd be lying if you weren't torn up over it still. You weren't ready to get out there as Pansy put it. She was so desperately trying to get you to move on from Enzo, but you weren't ready for that.

"I don't want to. I just wanted to get out of that stuffy Common Room and I wanted to drink....and Mattheo stopped sharing his stash with me." You say, pouting at the end.

"Boo-hoo, your brother didn't want to support you drowning yourself in your sorrows. At least he cares about you." She says.

"Both of my brothers are being all weird about this. It isn't fair." You grumble.

"You guys have that weird triplet bond. They probably can feel how upset you are." She says, looking mildly disturbed.

You did have a bit of a strange bond with your brothers. You guys were always so close growing up, being able to sense when one was in trouble or if one was in pain or if maybe one was simply not feeling the greatest. It wasn't always the greatest thing because if you found yourself feeling sad, then your brothers were there demanding what was wrong.

"I just wanna have fun!" You whine, feeling that light buzz finally wash over you.

"And you can! On the dance floor, with me." She says.

"Fineeee." You grumble.

You take her hand, begrudgingly getting up as you walk with her to the dance floor. You were awkward, not really wanting to let loose. You tried your best to ignore that feeling of awkwardness as you tried to let loose and enjoy the music. You close your eyes, only to be met with flashes of you and Enzo at a party, dancing so sensually. You open your eyes, Pansy a little bit away as she dances with a random guy.

Your phone starts to buzz in your pocket, so you grab it and answer it, not bothering to glance at the caller ID.

"Y/n/n, love?" Enzo murmurs.

You freeze, unsure of what to do. You hadn't prepared yourself for this yet. You were already heading outside, hoping the cool air would be able to bring you back.

"Love? Are you there?" He asks again.

"Yeah." You say quietly.

"I was wondering if you would come over so we could talk." He says.

You could hear the nervousness in his voice. You could imagine he was pacing around at this very moment, playing with his family ring or running a hand through his hair.

"I...I don't know, Lorenzo." You murmur.

You heard his sharp intake and your own heart hurt. No one called him Lorenzo. But, calling him Enzo felt wrong if you weren't together anymore. Not to mention, you always called him Enz or Zo. He loved when you called him that.

"Enzo...call me Enzo, please...o-or Enz...or Zo...anything, but Lorenzo." He pleads.

Your eyes sting with tears, hating how hurt he sounded, all because you. You knew that despite everything that led to your guys' break-up, that he didn't deserve this. You knew Enzo was a follower, he always was. So, when his best mates joke around about him distancing himself because he spent too much time with you or to say something about your outfit or to joke around about you...it hurts, even if you knew he was a follower.

Maybe he regretted that now. But, even then, it wasn't okay. It hurt you and when you tried to talk to him about it, his friends laughed and he joined them. Granted, you saw that he didn't hang with those people anymore. He strictly hung with your brothers; Tom and Mattheo, and your close friends; Theodore, Blaise, and Draco.

"I...I don't know if I can." You admit quietly, your own voice cracking.

“Can you come to my dorm? Please...I just want to talk, love." He pleads.

"I...I don't know if that's a good idea." You mumble.

It was quiet and your heart was heavy with guilt. You take in a shaky breath, looking around for a moment. You almost thought he hung up when you heard a strangled noise from his side. A tear falls down your cheek, realizing that he was trying not to cry.

"I respect that...I hope you're taking care, love." He murmurs.

You open your mouth to respond, but you heard the line end. You pull the phone away from your ear and frown, another lone tear falling down your cheek.

And I'm right here with all my friends

But you're sendin' me your new address

And I know we're done, I know we're through

But, God, when I look at you

You tried to dance with Pansy, but you found yourself calling it a night early. On your way back to Hogwarts, you found yourself looking at old pictures of you and Enzo, a painful ache in your chest. But, you found yourself in front of Enzo's dorm door, softly knocking. He laid in bed when he heard it, but he wasn't so sure if it was a knock or if someone was walking down the hallway.

You knocked again, a little harder as your heart began to beat violently in your chest. You weren't ready for this in the slightest. But, at the same time...maybe this is what you needed...no, probably not...probably yes...you weren't sure. You just knew you missed Enzo.

My brain goes, "Ah"

Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)

Like blah-blah-blah (blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah)

Should probably not

I should probably, probably not

The door opens to reveal Enzo. His eyes were puffy as if he'd be crying...you knew he had been. You try to give him a small smile, another way you tried to fight back your own tears, but really it just made a lone tear fall down your cheek. You quickly wipe it away, shuffling your feet awkwardly.

"I...after you called...I couldn't stop thinking...about us...so, I came to talk like...like you asked earlier...o-of course if you still want to. If not, I'll go." You murmur, your nerves getting the best of you.

"I still want to talk, love...I'm just surprised you came...after all...I hurt you. I don't deserve you giving me a chance to talk." He says, his face heating with his own embarrassment.

He moves aside, motioning you in. You step into the familiar dorm where you had spent most of your time. You take a seat on the edge of his bed, looking at him to ignore that he still had all of the pictures of you guys hung up. He sits beside you, leaving not much space between you both.

"Maybe...maybe not...but I feel like there is a lot being left unsaid." You say quietly, playing with the hem of your dress.

"I never should've attempted trying to impress them. If they were my friends, they'd be happy for me...for us. They'd treat you with the respect you deserve." He says.

"I'm glad you know that because it did really hurt me. I really thought we were going to be forever, Enzo." You say, smiling sadly.

"It's not too late for us to pick up the pieces, love. We can still be forever." He says.

Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight, fuck it, it's fine

You knew things would never be how they were before. You weren't sure if you could ever trust him one hundred percent after everything. You were one who would protect themself with whatever it takes, even if that means keeping people at a distance.

You were trying to find the words to tell him your thoughts, but his lips were on yours, kissing you softly. You were frozen at first, before you were melting into the kiss. You found yourself straddling his lap as his hands found your hips as he slowly leaned back, your guys' lips never breaking apart.

Your hands slide up to his hair, gently pulling at the soft locks. He groans into your mouth, pulling you impossibly closer to him. Your hips roll against him, feeling the growing hardness beneath you. His hand sweeps your hair over your shoulder, unzipping your dress as the other hand held your head in place.

You pull back, your lungs burning for air. You shrug the straps off your shoulders, letting the dress pool around your waist. He groans, his eyes falling on your breasts. He rolls over, your back pressed against the soft bed. He sits up, gently pulling your dress down past your hips and down your legs.

"N-No panties either, love? This dress is so short, I might have to go beat up any guys that stared too long." He grumbles.

Your cheeks flush red, but nonetheless you roll over, crawling to the middle of his bed. You heard his pants unbuckle and you lay back, your heart beating against your chest like a drum.

Yes, I know he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?

"I only see him as a friend," the biggest lie I ever said

Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?

I only see him as a friend, I just tripped and fell into his bed

"You are so beautiful, love." He murmurs, hovering above you, having had finally stripped from his clothes.

"And you're handsome, Enz." You whisper, looking into those brown eyes that were soft and warm, eyes that lured you in.

You moan softly as he sinks into you. The familiar hardness of him sinking inside of you, bit by bit, was tremendously overwhelming. You body still fit with his like a puzzle, yet you always struggled with the thickness of him. It was like your body refused to get use to his cock, but the familiar stretch and sting was pleasurable to you.

You finally felt as if you were at home. He sinks the rest of the way into you, leaning forward and pressing his forehead against yours. Your breaths mingled as you both tried to recover from a sensation you both missed. Being this close was something you both didn't see happening again after the breakup. And the both of you feared that this would still be the last time.

He slowly moves his hips, lifting his head and watching your face for any sign of discomfort. Your eyes were closed, but he desperately wanted to see y/e/c, his favorite. Your lips part as he picks up the pace, a soft moan leaving you.

"Open your eyes, love." He murmurs.

And you did.

Teary eyed as you looked up at him, unsure of what this meant for you both. His hips stutter as his own eyes gloss over. He leans down, kissing you softly as he tried to reassure you that it was okay, they everything would work out.

You hold him closer, afraid that if you let him go that you'd wake up and that this was a dream. You let him make love to you, something he made evidently clear and that this just wasn't sex or a fuck to him.

You went from being underneath him, to him behind you as you buried your face in his sheets, to being on top of him as your rolled your hips and watching him fall to pieces, to his head between your thighs, only for you to suck him off and you found yourself sitting on his face as his tongue did what it usually did when you guys were together.

All the while you sat on his face, rolling your hips and grinding against his face as you held onto the headboard, his hands holding onto to your hips, tears fell down your cheeks as his tongue traced out "I love you" over and over. He did it often when you guys were dating, trying to express how much he loved you.

You let him hold you closer after, your guys' bodies spent as you laid in silence. Your head was rested on his chest, listening to his rhythmic heartbeat. He had an arm wrapped around you, tracing a heart over and over on your hip, your legs entangled with his as his other hand ran through your hair. You had a hand rested on his abdomen, just wanting to be closer to him as your eyes began to close.

Now I'm gettin' in the car, wreckin' all my plans

I know I should stop—, but I can't

And I told my friends I was asleep

But I never said where or in whose sheets

You quietly slid your dress back on, trying not to wake Enzo and to beat everyone before they woke up. You rather do your walk of shame from his dorm in peace. You weren't so sure of where things stood between you and Enzo. You look back to see that he was stirring in his sleep, a hand reaching out to search for you in the empty side of his bed. Your heart ached and you were torn on climbing back into his bed or to leave.

"Stay, a little longer." He murmurs, almost as if he could hear your thoughts.

"This dress is uncomfortable and I'm not sure if being naked again in the best idea right now." You mumble, looking at the heels you held in hand.

"You can wear one of my shirts if you want. I think you still have some clothes in the drawer we put together for you. Although I doubt the shorts fit anymore." He mumbles.

"What?" You whisper confused.

"Not a bad thing, love. You've been working out a lot from what I've seen and then Pans told me. Your bum has gotten bigger. You can wear a pair of my boxers if you want." He murmurs, eyes still closed.

You were standing there, unsure of what to do. You look at the time and know you should leave because people will be waking up soon.

"Enz, people are going to be waking up soon. I should go." You whisper.

"Just a few minutes and then you can go. But, can we please talk soon? If not now, can we find a time?" He asks as you crawl back into his bed and curl up beside him.

"Look what talking led to last night, Enz." You whisper.

"Do you regret it?" He asks quietly, but you could hear the fear in his voice.

"No, I don't regret it, Enz. But, I just...I'm so confused and I'm unsure of what I should do." You admit.

"I know, I know you are, love...but please give us a chance to talk. We can go out for coffee if you'd like? That little shop we use to go to." He says.

"Okay...just text me the details you have in mind. I should go. I need to get showered." You murmur, sitting up some to look at his face.

He opens his eyes, watching you for a minute. He brushes a strand of hair behind your ear, his other hands cupping your cheek as his thumb ghosts over your bottom lip.

"If you don't go now, I'll probably end up kissing you and who knows where that will lead." He whispers.

"Go back to sleep, Enz. You look tired." You murmur, kissing his cheek before getting up.

You get to your dorm, letting a breath you didn't know you were holding out. You hurry to your en-suite bathroom, quickly getting in the shower. When you got out, you dressed in a white deep v-neck crop top. You pull on black leggings and a pair of converse. If you could take your last day of the weekend to be in comfy clothes before a torturous week of the formal wear, you'll take it. You dry your hair, but don't have the patience to style it. You put it up in a messy bun before applying mascara and lip gloss.

You meet up with Pansy who was regretting her choices of drinking so much. You guys stop at the bathroom because she felt like throwing up. You waited until she was done and she looked at you funny.

"I thought you went back to your dorm last night? Did you bring someone back? You've got a hickey." She says.

You go to the mirror and curse when you see a hickey poking out from the collar. You remembered that you'll curse Enzo later before turning back to Pansy, shrugging with a smile.

"I met someone on my way out. Nice guy." You murmur.

"Mhm...right." She murmurs, not believing you.

You see that Enzo was sitting with your brothers and your guys' shared friends. Pansy tugs at your hand.

"Can we please sit with them today? I know things are rough between you and Enzo, but I really miss all of them." She mumbles.

"Yeah, of course. Enzo and I talked a bit last night. He called me while we were dancing. We are both mature people and we can definitely be friends after everything." You say.

It wasn't a total lie, but you also felt like this was convincing you to be more comfortable with him and the possibility of either being friends or a couple again. You take a seat at the table, surprising the boys before Theodore hugs your tight, leaving a big wet kiss on your forehead.

"Ewww, Theo!" You whine, wiping your head on his shirt.

"I've missed having you around, baby Riddle." He admits.

"You've got to stop calling her that." Pansy laughs.

"She loves it, don't you?" He says.

"I love you." You say, grimacing and he laughs, pulling you into a hug.

"I'll start calling you, bella ragazza." He says, and your lips part at his Italian accent being so thick which only seems to show with him speaking his first language.

"What's it mean?" You ask curiously.

"Pretty girl." He says, smirking.

Enzo's hand tightens around his fork before tensing as a foot plops on his lap. He relaxes when he sees your familiar converse.

"No dating you two." Tom grumbles.

"Ew, no. She's like a sister to me. But, she hates being called princess, flower, rose, baby riddle, cutie, sunshine, and hun. So, it's pretty girl, but in Italian. It sounds cuter." He says.

"I'll try not to be offended that you said we about dating me." You pout.

"Oh, you know I love you, but I grew up with you and you were always like that annoying little sister I didn't realize I wanted. Hey! I was kidding, no need to get violent. Sure, you're pretty and all, but you're not feisty enough for me. Nor, as badass as I prefer." He says.

"She is literally the feistiest person ever. And she's scarier than Tom...and our dad. You just have to push the right buttons." Mattheo deadpans.

"Hey! Making me grumpy like that makes me feel icky for days! No making me grumpy or you'll all suffer the merciless wrath and you'll understand why our dad fears me. There is a reason our mother is nameless." You say, grinning.

"You are the freaking devil." Mattheo grumbles.

You glare at him, making the guys laugh. You pout and Enzo smile slightly at you. Things were starting to feel normal now and it felt nice to be surrounded by your friends and your brothers.

An owl swoops in, dropping a bouquet of flowers in front of you. Your lips part in surprise and your eyes widen briefly before you reach out and grab ahold of the bouquet. You could feel the eyes of your friends on you, the nervousness rising as their gazes flicker from you to Enzo. Enzo's face had flushed red from anger, his eyes darker than normal, his lips in a thin line and his fork was severely bent.

You slide the letter out and carefully open it. You flick open the letter, seeing it was from Tevon Long. He was a Ravenclaw, a year ahead of you. He was asking you out to Hogsmeade because he thought you were pretty.

"Who is it from?" Mattheo asks.

"Tevon Long." You mumble, tucking the note back in the envelope.

"What's he want?" He asks, popping his knuckles.

"Mattheo, you aren't hurting him. He hasn't even done anything. He just want to go out to Hogsmeade. But, I'll just tell him in not interested. See, simple? Sometimes conversations are better than fighting." You say, quirking an eyebrow at him.

"Tevon has a bad temper. It's probably best to take one of us guys when you decide to tell him you're not interested. He gets a little...violent. Unless, of course, you want me to handle him." Mattheo says.

"I can handle it. If he even raises a hand, no promises there'll be a Tevon Long anymore." You say, smiling at him.

"See, the devil." He laughs.

You shake your head, seeing Luna Lovegood walking towards your table.

"Nice flowers, Y/n. I was wondering if you are okay? You seem to be glowing today." She says with confusion.

"Glowing is a good thing, Lu." Pansy says softly, a smile on her face.

"Oh! Okay, that makes sense." She mumbles.

"Here." You murmur, taking a flower from the bouquet and tucking it behind her ear once you broke the stem.

"Thank you, have a good day." She says before walking away while mumbling to herself.

"I've gotta go, see you later." You mumble, deciding to get to class and avoid Tevon.

And I pull up to your place, on the second floor

And you're standin', smiling at the door

And I'm sure I've seen much hotter men

But I really can't remember when

"So, Tevon, huh." Lorenzo says, falling into step beside you.

"I told him off. He didn't like it very much. Theo stepped in because as Mattheo said, he went to get physical. Don't tell Mattheo he's right though. It'll go to his head and that's all we need," you say as you roll your eyes before glancing at him and smirking, "jealous, Berkshire? Green doesn't suit you."

"Jealous? I'm not jealous." He says quickly, his cheeks flushing red.

"Mhm...sure. It seems all the guys have decided it's been long enough since we broke up and now I keep receiving bouquets of flowers and chocolates. I've given most to Luna." You say, deciding to test the waters.

"Most? What about the others?" He asks.

"I kept one...he's a rather sweet guy...shouldn't I open myself up and give them a chance?" You ponder aloud.

You gasp, dropping your books and bag to the floor as your pressed against a nearby wall in the empty corridor. You look up at Enzo in surprise to see dark eyes, ones you didn't quite see often, but you knew he was in fact jealous.

"Okay, you win, love. I'm jealous, but please...do not go out with them. Give me a chance. Let me make things right." He pleads.

"And how do I know you won't just break my heart again?" You murmur, your eyes flickering to his lips.

"Because it's been hell since I fucked things up. Please...just give me a chance. I'm begging you. I'll make it right this time. We can be forever just like we imagined. Please, love." He begs.

"I love it when you beg, Enz. Such a pretty boy. But, I can't just give in to your pleas...not yet. You'll need to prove your worthiness as to why you deserve a chance after the shit you put me through." You say matter-a-factly.

"God, you really are a Riddle." He chuckles, leaning down to kiss your cheeks before bending down to grab your school items.

"Yes, and don't forget that for your own sake." You say, walking away from him with your stuff as he gapes at you.

My brain goes, "Ah"

Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)

Like blah-blah-blah (blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah)

Should probably not

I should probably, probably not

The music was loud in the Common Room and it was impossible to hear anyone. You were determined to have a good time though. It was a long week of testing and trying to continue to be stubborn to Lorenzo's attempts to prove he is a worthy of another chance. You were painfully afraid of him breaking your heart again. You weren't sure if you could handle it a second time. You wanted to be sure before making a mistake.

However, you might've forgotten to slow down on the drinks. Now you were dancing on a table with Pansy, a group of guys surrounding the table as they cheered you on.

The guys had assumed you two would be okay while they all went out for some fresh air, some of them just needing a smoke. However, none of them paid attention to the drinks the two of you downed before and during the party. Now you guys were drunk and the only thought on your mind was Lorenzo.

You couldn't stop thinking about his lips—god, his pillow soft pink lips, and not to mention his pretty brown eyes. You loved the way they were so soft, but there were the times you went crazy for those dark eyes staring down at you with desire as he fucked you.

You wanted his hands on your hips, loving how they were large and they were slightly veiny—something you were unaware you were attracted to.

At that very moment, Lorenzo walked in the Common Room first, the guys in tow before they all froze as they watched both you and Pansy in shock.

"Fuck, are they throwing money at us?" Pansy slurs, her lips brushing your ear as this was the only way to listen.

"Mmm, yeah I think so. Are we naked?" You mumble confused.

"No, no..." She mumbles.

"Do you think they can see up our dresses?" You whisper with wide eyes.

"Oh fudge nuggets." Pansy whispers.

They couldn't as the room was fairly dark, the green lights flashing amongst the dark room, but you guys wouldn't know that. The thought was gone soon after and you both were dancing sensually once more on the table as the guys pushes through the crowd.

Tom wraps a hand around your ankle, grasping your attention. He holds a hand out as Draco scoops Pansy off the table, handing her down to Blaise who gently sets her on the floor.

You wobble slightly, reaching a hand out and grabbing Toms hand. Mattheo appeared, taking your other one as you looked at the moving ground with a pale face. Lorenzo steps forward, his hands on your hips as he lifts you off the table and gently sets you on the floor. Your hands held your brothers tightly as you sway.

"Oh no, why's the floor moving...why's the room moving?" You mumble, looking around quickly which didn't help you.

"I can take her to her dorm." Lorenzo offers.

Your brothers accept the offer hesitantly, but they both knew he wouldn't ever hurt you. No, they knew it was eating him alive for what he did to you months ago. It was clear to everyone that he loved you desperately and he'd do anything to prove that to you.

He winds an arm around your waist, throwing your arm over his shoulder as he slowly makes the destination to your room. You finally felt like you could breathe.

"Drink this, love." He says softly, handing you a glass of water.

"You're so pretty, Enz. I've always wondered how someone could be so perfect. I love your lips, they are so pink and so soft. And your eyes, so warm and welcoming, yet I've gotten to see how dark and desperate filled they could be. And your hands...did I ever tell you how much I love your hands? They are so, so, sexy." You mumble as you grab his hand and look at it.

"Darling, drink the water." He urges softly, his cheeks red as he felt flustered.

You drink the water, unaware of the potion he'd put in to help sober you up faster. He sifts through your closet before finding one of his shirts you had stolen. He walks over to you, coaxing you to sit on the bed.

He gently starts to take your shoes off as you became more sober, but it didn't help with the feeling between your legs. He gasps lightly as your fingers tangle in his hair, lifting his head to look at you.

"I need you, Enz. Right the fuck now." You say, before gasping as he pins you to the bed, kissing you feverishly.

Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight, fuck it, it's fine

"So...these mysterious hickeys?" Pansy asks as you both get ready for classes.

"Just having fun." You mumble tiredly.

"Whatever. Are you and Enzo back together?" She asks.

"I know he's my ex, but we are just friends trying to reconnect." You say defensively.

"Right, and that's exactly why when I went to sneak in this morning, you both were lying in your bed naked." She says sarcastically.

You sigh, knowing that it was eventually going to be found out. You just wished you had more time. You focus on your eyeliner for the time being as you tried to find words.

"Okay...I don't know what's going on between Enz and I. I love him...that never went away, but I don't quite trust him. Or maybe I do. But, I'm so scared he'll break my heart again. I'm suppose to be making him prove he's worthy of even having a chance, but we ended up having sex again last night. I just don't need judged or told what to do. I don't know what I want or what I want to do." You admit.

"Y/n/n, I'd never judge you. I think you need to do what's right for you. No matter what you do, I'm in full support if you and Enz end up back together, that's great! You guys were amazing the first time around, it was just his shitty friends. But, they are out of the picture now and he has better friends. But, if you decide that you need to move on from Enz and be just friends, I got you. I'll set you up, I could probably set him up so it isn't so hard to be friends." She says and you laugh softly.

"Gosh, I love you Pans." You murmur.

"Oh I know." She laughs.

Yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?

"I only see him as a friend," the biggest lie I ever said,

Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?

I only see him as a friend, I just tripped and fell into his bed

You continue walking to the Black Lake. Your eyes on the figure who sat right at the shore. Pansy told you he was being odd today—skipping classes, being quiet, being distant and not his normal self at all.

You take a seat next to him, looking out over the Black Lake that glistened under the suns beacon. You look at your knees and sigh.

"Enz, what's going on?" You ask.

He's quiet, unsure of what to say and if he should even say it. You wait patiently, looking back over the lake as you rest your chin on your knees.

"What am I to you?" He asks quietly.

"What do you mean?" You ask confused.

"I've been trying for close to two or three months since we started talking to get back in your good graces. When I think things are going good, we end up sleeping together and then you push me away again." He says confused.

You were quiet, knowing you couldn't be mad that he was growing impatient and upset. It wasn't really fair of you to keep pushing him away after you guys have a very intimate moment. You haven't been the most communicative with him, and you know that.

"Look...I'm sorry. You're right, and I understand your feelings there. I should've been more communicative of my feelings." You explain slowly.

Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex

Can't two people reconnect?

"What's bothering you then? Talk to me, love. I need to understand where your head is in all this." He pleads.

"Enz...I love you and I'll probably always love you if we are being one hundred percent honest. Yes, when we were together I thought we were forever. And yes, I want to give you this chance, but I'm...I'm scared. I hate saying that, but I am. It has been so hard for me to vulnerable and to be able to open up and trust someone enough to love them my entire life...until you. Then...things happened and you hurt me. I want to give you the chance, but I'm so terrified of letting you back in and you hurting me again." You admits quietly.

You close your eyes, hating this sense of vulnerability and emotion. You always tried to keep your emotions at bay and your head on right in order to protect yourself, but it never seemed to quite work out that way when you were with Enzo. He was staring at you, trying to find words of his own and you couldn't bare to look in his deep brown eyes.

You weren't sure if you could handle what his eyes had to say. Instead, your eyes were closed as you tried to ground yourself.

The biggest lie I ever said

"Love...I know I screwed up the first time around, but trust me when I say I regret it. I don't even talk to those people anymore. I realized that if they couldn't accept that I was happy with you and that you were utterly amazing and beautiful, that they didn't deserve to be apart of our lives. I however, realized that too late. But, I learned from my mistakes and I don't want to ever hurt you again, love. Nor, lose you. I realized how much I need you in my life. My heart is yours just as my body and soul and I couldn't have it any other way." He says.

Flashes of the past few months of him trying goes through your head and you smile slightly. He's bought you countless bouquets of flowers, your favorite chocolates, writing handwritten notes, taking you out for a date, giving you his jumper or sweater when your cold, sweet little kisses on your cheek or hand to make you less anxious...and you realize that he's serious.

I just tripped and fell into his bed

"Would you be my boyfriend?" You ask.

You open your eyes, looking at him to see his cheeks flushing red as embarrassment and shyness creep up. You were always direct and he wasn't as direct. It somehow still managed to catch him off guard, even now.

"Yes." He whispers and you smile softly at him.

"You're so pretty." You murmur.

My brain goes, "Ah"

You walk into the Great Hall, hand-in-hand with Enzo as you laugh softly at his story. He was always a brilliant story-teller and he had a lot to fill you in on. Your brothers and friends look at the two of you with dropped jaws as you both sit across from each other. You rest a foot in his lap as you ignore the quietness from your table.

"A-Are you two dating?" Mattheo asks.

"Again?" Tom adds.

"I thought you both were just friends." Pansy whispers confused.

"Yes, we are dating...again. This time will be forever though." You say, smiling softly at Enzo who grins and agrees.

If only you knew the plans of this boys dreams for the two of you.

Can't hear my thoughts

The biggest lie I ever said

My brain goes, "Ah"

Can't hear my thoughts

I just tripped and fell into his bed

Thoughts

Blah

Thoughts

Blah

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