#it's fine i believe it'll all end out well so long as i stay true to myself yeah?

[notmorbid]

the reformatory.

dialogue prompts from the reformatory by tananarive due.

why'd you do a fool thing like that?

don't run barefoot.

school is holier than church.

everyone knowing your name isn't always a blessing.

i can speak for myself.

what's got into you?

you little shit.

you pushed me first.

what would ____ have done?

not all stories are suited for the ears of children.

you can only trust explosive secrets with three people, maybe four.

we should have run away when we had the chance.

you talk too damn much.

we'll get there faster if we cut through the woods.

sometimes life throws you a curveball, and you end up in places you never expected.

are the stories true?

i've never seen a more superstitious place.

there's no such thing as ghosts. that's an absolute fact.

evil is never plain to the eye.

stop fretting. just makes it worse.

sometimes the only justice is a hot meal and a bed to sleep in.

you know how to cook?

it could've been last week, for how well i remember it.

you think i don't know an evil eye when i see one?

if you're dead, stay dead.

you're scared of your shadow. always jumping.

who is it? who locked the door?

none of you can take a joke.

you seem more tired than usual.

you can talk sense when you want to.

men do evil every day and call it 'doing their job'.

i've heard all i can stand.

this is only a season, and it will pass. no matter what happens.

you don't bother me, i won't bother you.

you talk too damn much.

say you're sorry. put it behind you.

there's more ahead for you than this.

this isn't everything. there's more than this.

stories are dangerous.

if i needed you to, you'd cover for me?

no one stays nice. best to remember it.

go on. ask me what i know.

i wish i could say i had good news.

get a good cry out if you want.

you're not as smart about the world as you think you are.

no good talk starts at a bar.

mama used to say that unaired feelings ate you up inside.

i'm sorry. i've got no right to blame you.

don't tell your business on the phone.

hush that damn foolishness.

don't you be sick in my truck.

sometimes the worst thing happens. usually, in fact.

how do you believe in god, with all the bad things?

this whole world is a lie, the bad things and the good things.

you've got an answer for everything, don't you?

it's like you can see every thought in my head.

what did i ever do to you?

don't talk about my parents.

don't talk like you know anything about me.

everybody won't see. but you might.

telling the truth always breaks the peace.

one thing i've learned: everything seems fine, until it ain't. and then we come to see it wasn't ever fine.

i was never allowed to have nicknames.

____ made me feel like i mattered.

be strong. like _____. can you do that?

it'll be alright, as long as you tell the truth.

all a man has in the world is his name. your name outlives you.

i tried to tell you, didn't i?

you're so dumb. not the dumbest i've ever seen, but pretty damn close.

you don't get to ask about ____.

if you see me run, follow behind. no matter what.

please let me do something to help.

they wear you down one wrong at a time.

we should use a code to talk about it.

never give up a chance to laugh.

i'm beyond your help.

being dead isn't so bad.

you thought i didn't know?

does anyone remember you?

you need me, just like i need you.

constant worry steals everything from you.

i don't like strangers in my house.

you need a place to stay, and i have a spare room.

sometimes we say a thing to try to believe it.

i don't know what game you're playing, but it's a dangerous one.

the secret to war is the sacrifices friends make for each other.

we don't all sit around in a clubhouse. is that what you think?

let it out. but when you're done crying, we need to go over the plan.

wait a minute. just slow down.

we're no better than them.

some mistakes you don't come back from.

everything is a trick with you.

i don't want to kill anybody. not even ____.

[queenshelby]

OSCAR SPECIAL (PART ONE OF FOUR)

Given Cillian’s recent success, I decided to jump ahead a little in my fics and give you a little Oscar Special. But don’t worry, I will cover off everything in between in due course and, for some fics, this Oscar part will hopefully get you guessing, while for others it will constitute a happy ending!

Our Dirty Little Secret (Special Part)

Nine months later…

"I don't know why I agreed to this," you told Cillian while clutching his hand just as the car pulled up in front of the red carpet. This was your first public outing with Cillian since the scandal about your illicit affair had broken just over nine months ago and whilst you had found your way together, society did not exactly approve of your somewhat controversial relationship with the 47-year-old. 

"It'll be fine. You need to trust me," he whispered in your ear confidently, as if it were just another date night for you and not the greatest gathering of Hollywood's glitterati. Deep down, you wanted to believe him but it was obvious to you that he had put on act, just for you, to calm your nerves.  He hated these events just as much as you did and knew how hard it was for you to adapt to this lifestyle with him.

"I should have stayed with Mara, Cillian. I never left her for so long, you know," you then tried to change the topic, talking about the daughter you had brought into this world together just under nine months ago, but Cillian simply chuckled. 

"Mara will be fine with my mum, at the hotel. I promise," Cillian assured you with a loving smile. "Despite, I really need you with me tonight," he paused, gently squeezing your hand. "I couldn't imagine being here without you, Y/N," he then finally told you as one of the red-carpet attendees opened the door for you both. 

"Don't you dare run off on me," you gasped, seeing all those intimidating photographers taking pictures of you both as he helped you out of the car, your white dress grazing the asphalt.

"I would never," he chuckled, playfully winking at you, as you bit back a smile, realizing that you were too easily flustered.

He then took your hand into his firmly, clearly showing the world that you belonged together and not a single soul would change that.

"Cillian, over here!" a reporter yelled out while, another, shorter woman with fiery hair, aggressively jumped in to get a good shot of you both. The molten sea of cameras around you ignited a varied assortment of insecurities you forgot you ever had. Suddenly, you were a ten-year-old girl again, your heart dancing under its master's feet set ablaze by judgement; but Cillian squeezed your hand gently, reminding you that you were a woman now—his woman.

A familiar warmth spread through your chest as his steely blue eyes fixated on yours. A silently brokered promise passed between you two: Survive this together.

The female reporter from earlier pushed her way to the front, locking her beady gaze onto Cillian with a voracious hunger.

"Cillian, how does it feel to be nominated as Best Actor for your performance in Oppenheimer?" she asked while you tried to back off a little, but Cillian would not leave you alone, holding you closer to him, showing the world that you both were together in this.

"It's a true honor to be nominated. I couldn't be more grateful. The cast, the crew, everyone really poured their hearts into the story, and I wouldn't be here without them. It was something unique and powerful," he responded, barely looking at the woman, but at you instead, trying to keep his focus.

"And I see you are being supported by your wonderful, young girlfriend tonight, making this your first public outing together. Is that right?" the reporter asked, curiosity sparking excitement in her voice as she studied you two intently. 

"Well, we do have a young child together, which makes it difficult for us to attend events like this as a couple," Cillian began to say while smiling at you intently. "But, especially tonight, I couldn't ask for more than her presence," he admitted, his voice dripping with sincerity as he gazed at you openly.

The intensity of his gaze made your stomach flutter: It was a look that held secrets, a silent vow. You squeezed his hand tighter now and were unable to keep the smile from growing on your lips.

Cillian then stroked the back of your hand with his thumb, causing you to disconnect from the chaotic dance unfolding before your eyes and connect to the feeling of being near him, a feeling that cantered and calmed you.

"Thank you Cillian, and good luck tonight," the reporter finally offered a soft smile before signalling to her photographer to take some more pictures. 

As you walked down the red carpet, a familiar pop song began to infiltrate your eardrums as you ignored the snippets of questions being hurled at both of you, creating a barrier between your world and theirs. Even with the nest of hundreds of reporters and photographers, the red carpet no longer scared you as it used to, especially when you had Cillian by your side, shielding you from the worst of it all.

Eventually, you both reached your seats, not too far from the front of the stage and Cillian introduced you to some of the actors and actresses he had worked with. You also met some familiar faces, like Emily Blunt and her husband John who both had a calming presence about themselves. 

The tension seemed to melt away as you chatted with them and, for a moment, you managed to forget all the critical eyes resting on you, fading into the background until it was time to be quiet for the opening speech.

As the ceremony commenced, you merely held hands with Cillian, giving his reassurance every time he gave yours. Despite the constant whispers and sly glances coming your way, you tried to embody Cillian's mantra, staying present in this moment and focusing on his unwavering companionship instead of the judgement weighing you down. For hours on end, you managed to simply enjoy the show and, when finally, it was his turn to shine, you clutched his hand even tighter. 

"And the Oscar goes to," the presenter announced, opening the golden envelope while, secretly you had been crossing your fingers for him all week long. "Cillian Murphy!" he then announced, making a-thousand-cameras flash simultaneously as your heart began to race uncontrollably against your ribcage. It was a strange feeling, this overwhelming sense of pride that flooded you, leaving you bruised and raw from the exposure.

Standing up simultaneously with Cillian, a big smile formed on your face as, quickly you caressed his face. "You did it!" you whispered to Cillian, hugging him almost desperately as he embraced you back, tightly. He then kissed the top of your head, taking a moment to soak in the gravity of his achievement as the crowd around cheered and clapped for him.

"Fuck," he gasped, still in shock, before stagehands began urging him to come forward and take his spot to accept the coveted award.

"Go on and give your speech," you chuckled, gently pushing him towards the stage while blinking away the tears threatening to mess up your makeup and, just before he took to the stage, he turned his head quickly to capture your lips for a fleeting second, leaving an imprint of adoration behind.

With shaking hands, he mounted the steps, greeted by rousing applause, and you leaned against the back of your chair, watching his every move as he accepted his award. 

"Fuck," was the first word that escaped his lips, causing the audience to laugh in response and his actor's instinct kicked in as he used his impromptu curse to deliver an exquisite speech that brought a tear to your eye. 

"I am clearly overwhelmed by all this. Thank you. Truly," he spoke, his voice shaky. "I first and foremost want to thank Chris Nolan and Emma Thomas for having faith in me and creating such a masterpiece. To the incredible cast, Robert, Emily, and the rest, thank you for teaching me so much about the craft. I can't believe I get to share a title with such incredible artists," Cillian said before his eyes drifted in your direction, a small smile pulling at the corner of his lips. "And, of course, I want to thank my beautiful partner Y/N for supporting me through this in those last few months. You have pretty much been a single mother in the midst of award season, and I am so grateful that you are here with me tonight. To you, our daughter Mara and my son Max, I love you beyond words," Cillian said, his voice heavy with emotion, and it was then that your vision blurred with unshed tears.

He then proudly lifted his award into the air before humbly walking back to his seat, stealing a glance at you long enough to let you know exactly what he meant. 

"I am so proud of you," you whispered as he squeezed your hand again while, around you, murmurs originated from fellow celebrities congratulating him on his well-deserved win.

"This means a lot to me Y/N. Thank you for having been my rock those past few months," Cillian whispered back, his gratitude evident in the warmth of his touch. The intensity of his words caused your heart to flutter unexpectedly and, suddenly, everything around you became distant and muted.

Not too keen to attend the after party even following his success, when the show drew to an end, Cillian engaged in the necessary press engagements before suggesting that the two of you slipped away before everyone made their way to Vanity Fair. 

Together, you crept out into the night unnoticed, weaving your way through indulging crowds, gazing at each other, lost in all the nuances of the day that had unfolded—all the stolen glances between you both during the award ceremony, to the brush of his fingertips against your hand while trying to lead you through the venous crowds.

Eventually then, you arrived back at the hotel where Cillian's mother was watching Mara. She was already eagerly waiting your arrival and, as soon as Cillian walked through the door with the golden statute in his hand, his mother embraced him tightly. 

"I am so incredibly proud of you," she beamed while gripping his face, hardly believing her eyes. "Now you've got it all, a beautiful family and the biggest achievement of your career," she remarked, wiping a tear from her eye while looking at you and Mara.

"Thank you mum, and thank you for looking after Mara for us tonight," Cillian expressed graciously, managing a weak smile as he hugged her again.

Mara then squealed with delight, screaming, "Dada!" and you both looked at each other with great surprise.

"Did she just say daddy?" you gasped. You couldn't help but be utterly taken aback, finding yourself at a loss for words as you clutched Mara in your arms and buried your face in the nape of her neck.

It was the first time she had spoken and as you held her tightly, you couldn't help but feel a surge of love that coursed through your veins, rendering you dizzy.

You glanced up at Cillian as he stood there, flabbergasted.

"Dada!" she said again, reaching out for the golden statute jutting out from Cillian's grasp. He chuckled and carefully placed it away before picking Mara up and pressing a kiss to her chubby cheek.

"Hello Babygirl," he said, laughter dancing in his eyes, and the love in that moment was palpable between them, radiating with a warmth that touched your heart. "I missed you," he then said and your eyes welled up a little. It was moments like this that made you rethink the decisions you made several months ago and you knew that it was time for you to make another now. 

"I think maybe it is time for us to move in together now," you proposed to Cillian suddenly, as he looked at you with a gentle smile.

"It seems like two wins for me tonight then," he replied, taking your hand in his as Mara gurgled contentedly between you. He had waited for you to make this call for months now, ever since he first proposed it to you and now it was finally here.

To be continued...

Tags:

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[kaypeace21]

[The future of this BLOG]: SHOWS I'm planning on analyzing here & on YouTube

Interview with the vampire

Invincible

House of the dragon

The boys

Umbrella acadamy

Bridgerton probably (still haven't had time to watch part 2 yet)

stranger things: I have mixed feelings about reviewing it given what certain staff has said and done. I oscilate between wanting to review the final season or wanting to boycott it (especially as someone who has been part of the BDS movement for 1/2 her life). But, on one hand, It's not the fault of the underpaid (and talented) writers and staff who don't have these views. And I do believe some of the writing staff may have good intentions and want to give us a positive and powerful message to the audience about healing from childhood tr*uma. However, other members of the writing staff may just want to go down the stereotypical and popular-easy route. We'll just have to wait and see what happens in the last season. If I hear the ending isn't simply another re-hashing of prior seasons and it's more like s1-2 (without the cliches of s3-4). I'd be more inclined to review it by *cough* and watching it elsewhere. Once I was logged back on to tumblr: I did have a whole draft saved about my politics since I was a kid and why I still feel so strongly about such conflicts, today . But, I shouldn't make the topic about me- and I'm not sure anyone wants to hear my life story XD. So, the big point (to my followers) is regardless of whether I chose to watch it or boycot it-

I'm not deleting the old ST content: so do what you want with it (like, reblog, add details to reblogs I didn't notice). Have fun :D !

Analyzing ST certainly helped me improve in terms of media literacy (and it'll be beneficial for the future content I make). So even if it sometimes got messy here, I do appreciate all the positives the ST blog and followers brought to me.The kind words meant a lot. For those who want to unfollow me for my political beliefs , that's totally fine. That's your prerogative. For those who want to unfollow cause again ST was pretty much my whole blog: again I TOTALLY understand and I wish you the best :). I'm not going to judge, take away, or guilt anyone, for their choice of media they like. Enjoy it (I truly mean that).

For those who continue to follow my blog . I appreciate you SO MUCH! I've been gone from this blog for such a long time cause of school (and I appreciate those who stayed and were excited to see me again). The positive words meant a lot over the years. Everyone have a lovely day. Take care of yourselves.

Sincerely, Kay

ps: I'm open to other media suggestions too so you can drop them in my message box (recent films/ shows, mini/limited series, animation, heck i'm open to comedies and foreign media too).But, analyzing them will most likely be after the shows listed above .Right now I'm focusing on my national exam and my mental health. My first video will probably be in late August or early September. My test is August 20th. Hope everyone is doing well .I'm feeling much better mentally. Hope everyone is feeling the same way :)

for my 1st video I’ll just post it to youtube . But for other videos I may make a early access patreon (like a week before the next video comes out free on youtube). Have to google how all that works (or if there's better alternatives) . Totally fine if you can't afford it (you'll get to see it for free on youtube regardless :D) . I'll be honest . I'm primarily thinking of doing it cause I need to pay off those student loans and I'm trying to hopefully move out of state in a few years. Plus, I love analyzing media anyways (so making it a part time job would be a dream come true .

[lavenderbexlatte]

day 3: mirror sex

stray kids 1.5k words gender neutral reader insert Reader x Bang Chan NSFW

🖤 warnings: undernegotiated kink, implied consent, themes of negative body image🖤

🎂 happy bang chan day~

kinktober masterlist

connect with me! / masterlist

Truly, these are the dangers of not pre-booking a place to stay.

Last-minute travel isn't usually your thing, but an unexpectedly long weekend means that there's finally time in your favorite guy's backbreaking schedule for a little getaway.

But last-minute travel, with no hotel booked, means love motels.

They're not as creepy as they sound, not usually dirty or weird. Inexpensive, yes, and usually a little older than the resorts and boutiques that most people prefer. They get a bad rap just because of the connotations, but like, people have sex in all kinds of hotels.

You think it's kind of cool, honestly. Homey, in a weird way.

The person at the front desk is a nice older lady, and she doesn't even blink as she asks if the two of you have any plans this weekend.

"Plans outside the room, I mean."

She winks. She's not subtle, but it's sweet.

And now, in the elevator, Chan is looking around in unmasked horror. Taking in the garish burgundy interior, the thinly-veiled adverts for sex workers taped to the walls.

"It's not that bad," you say.

"It'll be fine for two nights," Chan replies, sounding as if he doesn't believe that at all. "Anyway, we're only sleeping here. We'll have stuff to do."

"Oh, come on. We might as well put the place to its intended use."

Chan scoffs, as if the idea of using the sex motel for sex is ridiculous.

"As long as the room's clean, that's all I care about," you continue. "It's a hotel. Whatever."

"Whatever," Chan agrees tentatively.

He's still lying to himself, but he does relax a little.

When you get to your floor, things are extremely normal. Nondescript hotel decor, the faint smell of carpet cleaning solution and lemon furniture polish. Cleaner than other places you've stayed for far more money, honestly.

The room itself is at the end of the hall, which you like, for the privacy, even though there are only five or six rooms on the floor.

You let yourself into the room, and it's as clean and fresh as the rest of the hall. Again, about as good as it gets in terms of a cheap hotel.

"See?" you say.

Chan looks at you, clearly unimpressed.

"What? It's clean. I'll check for bedbugs, but other than that..."

He points upward.

There is a giant mirror stuck to the ceiling above the bed, but nowhere is perfect.

"Even that's clean," you joke.

The surface of the glass is spotless, no fingerprints and not even any dust that you can see from down here. Chan still looks unhappy. Cleanliness is obviously not his concern.

"Don't be a downer," you say.

"Why do people like that?" he grumbles.

You've set your bag down on the armchair in the corner of the room, rifling through it for your toiletries to set out in the bathroom, but you humor him without looking. "Like what?"

"The mirrors."

"In the room?" you glance at him. "Isn't that, like, the sex motel cliche? The heart shaped bed, the red lights, the mirrors?"

This room only has one of the above. Pretty tame.

"It just means you have to - I mean, you can already see your partner, why would you need-"

"You're really thinking about this," you interrupt.

He is. He really is, standing beside the bed and staring up at his own reflection pensively.

"It's so you can see yourself," you add, walking past with your armload of cosmetics.

From in the bathroom, you hear his answer, still pouty.

"Why would I wanna do that?"

Oh, here we go.

"Some people get off on it," you say.

He scoffs a laugh, humorless. You're being generous by not calling him out, here, because he's being self-deprecating. You hate that.

"I'm gonna terrify myself in the middle of the night," he says.

That might be true. He's a little bit of a scaredy-cat. But that's beside the point.

"That's not your actual problem, though," you reply, as you come back into the room proper.

He shrugs.

"Haven't you ever been curious?" you ask.

"About what I look like?" he shoots back, glancing back up at the mirror. "Done. Wow."

"I mean during."

Immediately, like flipping a switch, his ears flame pink. "Not really."

"No? Never?"

He looks at you pointedly. He knows what you're doing. You're not subtle, so that's fine.

"We should find out," you say, grinning.

It's a challenge, now.

Your gorgeous, gorgeous boy hates how he looks. That's common knowledge for anyone who's tried to get him to take a photo together, or shop for clothes, or compliment him on a new haircut. Most of your mutual friends just ignore it. But sometimes you just can't stand it.

He would never be the type to want to see himself in the mirror in the throes of passion, uninhibited. Which is exactly why he needs to give it a try.

"How easy do you think I am?" he accuses, correctly.

"I dunno." Instead of bothering him more, you flop down onto the bed yourself, feet still on the floor, staring up at your reflection. "You tell me."

The bait is laid, and like always, his insatiable ass can't help it. You two haven't had proper alone time in what feels like forever. He nudges between your knees, standing over you as you lay there on your back. You already like the look of the scene in the mirror, the way that his reflected form looms, the way it makes you look small.

"You know," Chan says, "We could put this place to its intended use."

You grin at your own words recycled. Great minds and all that.

"What an idea."

"Just an idea," he assures you.

He drops onto his knees, nudging you up the mattress to make room for himself.

You almost lose track of your own plan, once he kisses you. Hands roam, clothes are lost, the ease and comfort of something you've done so many times. For a while, it's just an encounter like all the others. His hands that know you, his warmth and presence and attention.

And then you remember, suddenly, once you're nude and he is too, and he's asking you how you want it.

"You on your back," you say, trying not to smile at your own ingeniousness and reveal the plan.

"You got it, baby."

He flips over, and he's settled fully into the pillows with you halfway onto his lap before he looks up. He looks up at the ceiling, and he realizes.

"Wait-"

"Gotcha," you smirk, settling fully on top of him.

He could very easily just knock you over and change things up, or he could ask you to stop, and of course, you would. But he doesn't. He just flushes, red again down his ears, his neck, and he covers his face with his hands.

"That's not gonna work," you say, peeling his fingers away from his eyes.

"I can't believe you tricked me," he says pitifully.

"I did no such thing," you reply. "But now that we're here, why don't we play a game?"

"Something tells me I won't like this game."

"Here's the rules," you say.

You pause long enough to rise onto your knees, to seek out his length - desperately hard, revealing that you haven't freaked him out too badly - and line him up.

"I'm gonna make us feel good. And you...have to look."

Chan pouts, putting his full lips to good use. "I'd rather look at you. Don't you want me to look at you?"

He punctuates it by running his hands up your back, hips to shoulder blades, soothing attention from gentle fingertips.

"I think you should look at yourself," you tell him.

"But-"

"Actually, no. I think you have to look at yourself," you decide.

He peeks upward. His flush deepens.

You're not sure why he doesn't like what he sees. From where you are, it's stunning. His slim body lines, the sharp cut of his face and his dark eyes against the bleached-white hotel sheets. Distractibly, biteably pink and embarrassed.

"If you don't look at yourself," you add, dropping your hips just enough so that he can feel you, "I'll stop."

He looks overdramatically betrayed, like a dog when you take their toy away to throw it. It's cute enough that you reach down to squeeze his face in your hand.

"That's the game," you say.

"Fine."

His voice is an embarrassed squeak, but that's consent, baby. You trust him enough to know that although he hates losing, he's not going to yes you to death if things are actually feeling uncool.

Permission granted, and his eyes dutifully trained on the ceiling, you ease yourself down onto his waiting length.

Curiously, once you're seated and he's swearing through his teeth, you tilt your head up to look at yourself, too. The angle isn't as good to see you, but you've got the gist of it. Your spread thighs, your arched back, the little bit of motion as you grind on top of him.

Nice.

"Don't we look good?" you ask, sweet as can be.

He nods against the pillow. "You look-"

"Not me," you tut. "You're not supposed to be looking at me."

Chan swears. You wait.

"I...I look..."

After a second, he swallows, and squeezes his eyes shut.

Pity.

You pull back up onto your knees. His wet cock slips free.

"I told you the rules. Keep looking at you."

[13as07]

Gift

(Rock Lee)

[Artwork is not mine! Credit to Pixiv Id]

Requested by: @randomwords-world

Word Count: 3,323

Warnings and/or Pre-Notes:

Pregnancy Trope Alert (cause I think it'll be cute); Also, Lee would 100% be the Dad to pass out in the delivery room

Neji still isn't dead because I refuse to believe it and I'm a bit pissed off about it still

Part Two?

———————————————————————

     Neji waddles around after me in the kitchen, helping me prep the food for the party going on in the living room. Ever since Mr Know-It-All found out I was pregnant, he's been my personal guard dog, insisting on helping me until I tell Lee about it. He swears he'll back off after, but seeing how he was for Hinata's pregnancy I doubt that's true. Maybe I'll get lucky and be able to squeeze out of it on the ruling of "Best Friend's Wife" but I doubt that as well. 

     "Lee-Chan, you look ridiculous," he mutters for the hundredth time, referring to the mask I've chosen to wear over my face while we're in the kitchen. The mask that he snatches away from me.

     For whatever reason tomatoes seem to trigger my morning sickness - that seems to be more of an all-day sickness - and Lee wanted curry for his Birthday lunch, which requires tomatoes. So, I've spent the day constantly throwing up as I've prepared the curry, the side dishes, and the appetizers.

     "Just let me worry about the curry, won't you woman?" Neji gently teases, snatching the wooden spoon from me before using it to give a playful tap to my hand. "Go take the cheese trays and such out to the party and spend some time with your husband."

     "I'm finally, Nej. I can handle the food," I try to fight back, a smile spreading on my face because of the demanding man.

     "As this generation's voted big brother, I'm telling you no. Go spend time with Lee," He bites back, hand on his hip and the spoon waving around in the air as he lectures me.

     "Who voted for that?"

     "Me," Neji answers, eyes locked on me for a second before flicking towards the door, nonverbally ordering me to leave. I let out a sigh but give in and pick up one of the cheese trays before heading toward the living room. "Thank you," he says more to himself than me. What a diva Neji turned out to be.

      Welcomebacks are thrown at me by the partygoers; friends, colleagues, and random civilians who have come to stay for the party or popped in to give Lee a quick "Happy Birthday". For the past hour or so our front door has been propped open with constant foot traffic in and out. I'm going to have to mop tomorrow.

     It doesn't take long for Rock to see me, his smile somehow growing more once his eyes land on me. He's such a lover boy and he's going to be such a good father. "There you are, my pretty midnight Orchid," he calls, instantly leaving the people he's talking with to come greet me.

     "Here I am," I repeat, setting the serving plate on the long table packed with food. I start messing with the table, stacking the empty trays and piling up the trash to be thrown away.

     "You've done enough already, my precious Orchid," Rock mutters, scooping my hands between his. Our hands are folded together, mine in the middle and his covering mine as his head bows down. My lover boy wastes no time brushing kisses over every inch of skin stretched across my finger. "Sit down for a moment, or at least come stand with me for a while. I feel like I've barely seen you since the guests have gotten here."

     "I'm sorry, Rocky. I'm just trying to make sure the food comes out right and such."

     His smile doesn't waiver as he looks at me, as happy as ever to be looking at and touching me. I swear no matter how long we're together I don't think the honeymoon phase is ever going to end with Rock. "I know, beautiful. I appreciate all of it, I really do. I didn't see Neji leave the kitchen so I'm sure he's handling everything and even if he's not, our guests will be fine if you take a few moments to spend with me."

     "You're dumb, Rocky," I mutter, warmth climbing up my cheeks at how eager my husband is to spend time with me. I swear he jumped off the pages of one of those romance books.

     "Well if wanting to spend time with my lady is dumb, then I'm as dumb as they come, Chamomile." I laugh at his joke, leaning forward to steal a kiss. He eagerly returns it, a hand curling around my wrist as the other one slides up to cup my cheek. "Your lips always taste so sweet," he hums dreamily when we pull apart, the hand on my cheek moving again to twirl a piece of my hair. "If all I got was you today, I could die a happy man. Do you know that my precious Poppy?"

     I can feel the heat rising on my cheeks, the darkening of my blush widening Rock's smile. I swear it's harder for him not to compliment me than it is for him to compliment me. "I'm glad but I'm sure you'll change your mind after you open your gifts."

    His smile loosens a bit, confusion trapped in his eyes as he searches my face. His hands clamp around mine again, tugged up to his lips so he can decorate my fingertips in kisses. "Dandelion, no material item could ever make me as happy as you have. I'm sorry if I've done something to make you feel that way."

     I laugh again, the present I for Rock rolling around in my head as I watch his mini-panic. "You haven't. Don't think too much about it, okay? It'll make sense later. I just know I got you a really good present this year."

     "Still, no matter what you got me, you'll always make me the happiest."

     "I don't think so," I tease, my cheeks starting to hurt from my smile and the secret of his present resting on the tip of my tongue.

     "What is this great gift you got me then, Lotus?" He teases back, his kisses now slowly traveling across my wrist, and beelining up my arm.

     "You have to wait until you open your gifts and I had Neji hide mine so it's the last one you open."

     Rick's eyes jump up to lock with mine, amusement present in them along with his soft laugh. "Well, I'll just have to open my presents now then if I want to find out."

     "You're the Birthday Boy. Anything you say goes today," I remind him, instantly getting dragged into the middle of the room. I guess he's excited to see what I got him.

     "Hey, Naruto," Rock calls, holding my hand as he helps to settle me on the ground. The new dad turns his attention, his son curled up in his arms. Boruto came out the spitting image of his father, which I find adorable. Will our kid look that much like Rock? I hope so. "Do you mind going to grab Neji from the kitchen so I can open my gifts?"

     "Sure," Naruto mutters, carefully placing his baby back into Hinata's arms.

     As he leaves the room, Rock settles on the floor next to me. His hand is instantly wrapped around mine again, placing our knotted fingers in his knee. "I can't believe you're making me open you're present last."

     "Like I told you, it's the best one. Best for last," I tease, taking the drink Tenten offers me. I glance into the cup, being met with a dark purple color and a cranberry scent. Is it normal cranberry juice or cranberry vodka? It's hard to tell seeing how Sakura and her have been making cranberry vodkas for everyone during the party.

     "Hello," Neji greets me out of no where, his hand on my shoulder. He plucks the cup out of my hand, tasting it before he walks away, off to go make me a nonalcoholic cranberry juice.

      "Do... do you want me to make you another one?" Tenten asks, her eyes, and a finger jumping between Neji and me.

     "I think Neji has it under control," I tell her, sending her a smile. She looks me up and down for a moment, trying to figure out what the hell just happened. After all, it's out of character for her squad mate to stroll up and snatch a cup out of someone's hands. It's even more out of character for him to stroll away with the drink after.

     Tenten - and now Rock - both look confused as Neji settles in front of me. He looks down at the cups like he can't remember which is which, before taking a sip from both. "This one's yours," he mutters, handing me one of the cups.

     "Thank you," I murmur back, taking two or three sips from the plastic cup before settling it on the floor. "Alright, Rock," I say, squeezing his hand as I turn my attention toward him. "Are you ready for your gifts?" I ask him, starting to climb to my feet.

     Neji appears out of thin air, again, to settle a hand on my shoulder, keeping me seated on the floor. "I'll grab his gifts. You relax," he orders, nodding his head to confirm his ruling. Once again, he floats away, heading off the gift table to collect Rock's presents.

     "So, Neji is being weird," Rock chuckles, glancing at his friend before he smiles at me. "Is he dying or something?"

     The empty question makes me laugh, my head tipping to rest on his shoulder. "That'll make sense after you open your gift too."

     "I think you should let me open your gift first," Rocky says, shaking his head back and forth to softly tap it against mine. "Even if the best things are better last."

     "That's something you have to talk to Neji about. I'm so excited about it that I had him hide it so I couldn't give it to you early."

     "Talk to me about what?" Rock's squad mate asks, appearing beside us with a stack of presents he's working towards the floor. I swear we should invest in getting Neji a bell.

     "Where you hide my Sunflower's present for me so I can open it first."

     "I think it would be best if you opened her gift last," Neji mutters, situating the gifts so the growing crowd can see Rock but he can still reach everything.

     "But I want to open it first."

     Neji lets out a long, disapproving sigh as he straightens himself. "Fine, I'll be right back," he grumbles, disappearing to go retrieve the gift from whatever hidy-hole he stuck it in. As we wait, Rocky's focus is on me, his hand squeezing mine, kisses being littered across my forehead, and his free hand repeatedly brushing the hair out of my face so he can continue to litter me in kisses.

     "Alright, alright," Neji calls when he returns, gathering the attention of the room. "You all need to pay attention to this gift. I don't care if you pay attention after, but this is the important one," he announces, handing the gift to Rock before he floats away again. It takes a second but I find him stashed away in the group of people, camera in his hold and pressed to his face as he prepares to snap pictures of his friend's reaction.

     Rock settles the tan-wrapped box in front of himself, eyeing me as he toys with the bow on top. "What's so important about this present?" He asks, carefully tugging on the ribbons to undo the bow.

     "Just open it," I giggle, lifting my head off him before I knock my shoulder against his.

     He knocks his shoulder against mine in return, happiness radiating off of him as he carefully unwraps the package. Everyone holds their breath as Rocky carefully opens the box. My excitement and want to burst out the secret steers in my stomach as I watch him remove the cover tissue paper.

     Confusion flickers over his face as he looks down at the first layer of the present; the three positive pregnancy tests in plastic wrap, a copy of my first ultrasound, marked with a red circle to show where our baby is in the picture since I was only five weeks along, and a copy of the ultrasound Neji took me to last week. I was ten weeks along in that photo, so the picture of our baby is a lot more defined.

     "Darling," Rock calls, showing me the photos as if I wasn't the one to put them in there. "I'm sorry but I'm confused."

     "Just keep going," I tell him, taking the items from him. I place the baggy on the floor, but hand the photos to Tenten for safekeeping. As soon as she sees them, I can see the pieces snap into place; she's finally putting together Neji's weird behaviors.

     Rocky still looks confused but obeys, taking out the piece of tissue paper that separates the two layers of his gift. He pulls out the deep green knitted blanket, a project I'm quite impressed Gai managed to get done in a couple of weeks. Rock unfolds the blanket, showing us the dark black letters in the center; 'Might and Lee Legacy in the making'.

     "Aw, that's cute," he mutters, turning the blanket around to hold it up to the crowd. My smile grows as I watch confusion crawl onto everyone's faces, eyes flickering my way. Well, everyone but Gai and Neji; the younger boy is still behind the camera and Gai almost bouncing in his wheelchair as he whispers to my Sensei.

     "It's a little small though," he adds pointing out how the blanket could only cover half of him at most. "It's still perfect, Lavender," Rocky quickly adds, carefully folding the blanket.

     "There are two more things in your box," I mutter, tipping the box my way so Tenten can get a pick into it. Tears are rolling down her face, curving around her smile as she looks at the pictures of her future niece or nephew. "Take them out at the same time."

     "Yes ma'am," he eagerly answers, resting the blanket on his lap before he pulls out the last two items. He unfolds the shirt, his smile growing as he reads over the text. 'Lee Lifting Squad' is carefully pressed into the shirt. "Cute. Did you get me matching shorts too?" He teases, showing the shirt to the crowd before folding it and adding it to the pile on his lap.

     "Not quite," I mutter, locking my eyes on his face, eagerly waiting for the relaxation to hit.

     "I don't get how any of this goes with the pictures or the sticks," Rocky mutters, unfolding the onesie with matching writing to his new shirt. Confusion filters through his features again as he lifts the onesie, his head slowly turning towards me. "Did... you... get the cat an outfit?" He asks, turning the cloth around to show the group.

     Gasps and shouts of joy fill the room, snapping Rock's head away from me. "I'm confused," he mutters, looking at the baby outfit again.

     "What is that?" I ask, pointing to his hands.

     "A onesie?"

     "Alright, what's that?" I continue, pointing at his lap.

     "A blanket, my Cherry Blossom. I'm still confused."

     I hush him, picking up the baggy and waving it around a bit. "What are these?"

     "Pregnancy tests?" He mutters, glancing between his presents and me. "Oh, Lord, you're pregnant," he whispers, clinging to the onesie. "Dear Lord, you're pregnant!" He repeats, dropping the cloth before lunging at me. Rocky wraps his arms around my neck, holding me as he pulls me into his chest. "Oh my, oh my, oh my," he says on repeat, rocking us back and forth as he clings to me.

     I giggle, stamping kisses onto his cheek as I hold onto his arms. The party-goers cheer, a few of Rock's friends egging him for not catching wind of what was going on sooner. "Congratulations, Dad."

     "Congratulations, Mom," he echos, his voice shaky with happy tears. "Oh dear, is this why Neji has been all weird recently?" Rocky asks, pulling away a bit, one hand holding onto my neck as the other one jumps down to feel my stomach.

     "Ya," I mutter, resting my head against his arm.

     "You told Neji before me?" He teasingly cries, leaning forward to litter my face with kisses, his hand rubbing circles into my stomach.

     "That's what happens when you have a genius as a best friend."

     "You tell anyone else before me?" He asks, resting his forehead against mine. His wide eyes stare into mine, happy tears spilling down his cheeks.

     "Just Gai so he could make the blanket for your present."

     Rocky chuckles, leaning forward to crash his lips against mine. "I'm going to be a dad," he breathes out when we pull apart, laying quick small pecks to my lips. "You're going to be a mom."

     "Alright, you've hogged my daughter-in-law and my grandbaby enough," Gai's deep voice booms, pulling our attention toward him. He's eagerly wheeling himself forward, Kakashi following close behind.

     My husband chuckles at his Sensei, pulling away from me to climb to his feet. Once he's up, Rock grabs my hands, helping me climb to my feet. "Hey Gai," I greet, bending down to hug him.

     "Hello, Little Lotus," he mutters, wrapping his arms around me. "Can I feel your stomach now?"

     "Ya, you can," I chuckle, pulling away from my Husband's surrogate father.

     Gai is vibrating almost as much as Rocky, carefully placing his hand on my small baby bump. "Hello, Littler Lotus," he mutters, rubbing his hand across my stomach. "I'm your grandpa who's going to get you in so much terrible. You're going to call me Pop-Pop," he turns around, snagging Kakashi's hand to add it to my stomach.

     "Gai," Kakashi starts, trying to pull his hand away. "You can't just do that."

     "It's fine," I giggle, resting my hand on top of his. "I don't mind you touching my belly, Grandpa," I tease, shooting my Sensei a smile.

     "This is your other grandpa. You're going to call him Grump because he's always grumpy."

     Rock is vibrating so much that he's bouncing on his feet, eagerness spilling from me. Before he can stop himself, he's attached to me again, arms around my shoulders and kisses being stamped to my face.

     "I can't believe you told Gai before me," Kakashi grumbles, rubbing a few small circles against me before pulling his hand away. "And your kid is not calling me Grump."

     "They totally are," Gai coos, his focus mostly on Rock and my unborn baby. "Aren't you? Pop-Pop Gai, Grump Kash, Uncle Neji, Auntie Tenten, you're going to have so much love."

     "What about my students?" Sensei deadpans, rolling his eyes at his friend.

     "Yes, yes. Uncle Naruto and Auntie Sakura too. Along with your Uncle Sasuke and cousin Boruto. You're going to be so loved when you enter this world, Littler Lotus."

     Kakashi rolls his eyes again, taking hold of Gai's wheelchair to pull him away. "Alright, I'm sure others want to congratulate them and that they'll want a moment alone. Let's go find the booze table." Gai whines for a moment but doesn't do anything to stop Sensei from moving him.

     Instantly, Rock's hands fall to lay against me, kisses still brushing against my cheeks as he pays attention to our child. "I think it's going to be a boy."

     "I bet it's a girl," I counter, leaning against my husband and resting my hands on top of his.

     "It's a boy. I can feel it. It's going to be a boy," Rock mutters, slowly rocking us back and forth again.

     "It's a girl," I bite back, even though I do hope it's a boy. Rock would be so excited to have a son, though he'd make a cute girl dad.

———————————————————————

[lythea-creation]

Fighting For You - Rania x reader x Layan

summary: Rania, Layan and (f/n) have been best friends for a long time. But what if that simply isn't enough anymore? Will Rania and Layan manage to save their friendship?

warnings: mentions of abuse (yk Rania's dad)

word count: 1.151

Author's note: Feel free to check out my Masterlists and make requests. No reposting please! Reblogging, comments and requests are always appreciated <3 If you like the story/my writing, please don't be shy to say it via comments or asks! It takes you a few seconds and might make my day. It's the best appreciation you can show to a writer you like.

Requested? Yes

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“Hey, (f/n)! Do you wanna come to the club with us later?”, Layan invited me.

We were on our school trip right now. Everyone was enjoying the holiday feeling, enjoying relaxing in the sun, playing volleyball and drinking some alcohol-free cocktails at the bar.

“What do you mean? Are you going to sneak out again?”, I questioned.

We were standing a bit apart from the rest of the class. So nobody was listening us.

“Yeah, it'll be fun”, Rania tried encouraging me. “But even more so if you come along.”

“I'm feeling flattered, but I don't know. Weird things are happening lately. I'm not sure if it's smart to sneak out right now”, I considered.

“I'm sure it'll be fine”, Layan proposed.

“We're gonna dress up, dance a little. Nobody's even gonna notice”, Rania supposed.

“Fine”, I gave in with a sigh. “But only because it's you.”

The girls smiled brightly at me and I could not help but smile back.

Then we all went over to the bar to enjoy some cocktails and chat a bit. It was great to spend so much time with Rania and Layan without having to worry about their families.

And when we had managed to fool Miss Abeer and arrived at the club a few hours later, it felt like a whole new world had just opened up to us.

Strict rules, like staying with the group, wearing certain clothes, being calm and reasonable were replaced by flashy lights, loud music and hot outfits.

I had no idea how Layan had gotten our names onto the list, but that did not matter.

We were having the time of our lives dancing together.

I was feeling high by the way their bodies were moving so close to mine, following the rhythm of the beat.

After a while I excused myself to go to the bathroom. When I was about to leave and return to the dance floor, I almost bumped into Layan.

“Hey! What do you say? Are you enjoying yourself?”, Layan asked me, wearing a huge smile.

“Definitely”, I confirmed. “I love spending time with you anyway.”

“Oh, I love to hear that”, she shot back, her smile turning into a smirk.

“I'm gonna wait until you're finished”, I declared.

“Alright. Give me two minutes”, she requested.

Staying true to my words I was waiting outside until she joined me again. Together we made our way back to Rania.

But just as we wanted to approach her Miss Abeer and Miss Jumana showed up.

I quickly caught Layan's wrist to stop her from getting any closer.

“Shit”, she cursed. “What are we gonna do? We can't just leave her.”

Rania seemed to be looking around for us and shortly made eye contact with me. Then she signaled us to leave.

Reluctantly we took her offer and hurried back to our room, wiping off the make-up and putting our pajamas on as we were freaking out.

“I can't believe we bailed on her”, I accused us.

“We didn't mean to. Rania only tried to help us out. Her situation wouldn't get any better if we got caught as well”, Layan resonated.

“Doesn't make me feel any better though”, I noted.

“Yeah, I know what you mean.”

In the end Rania got suspended for a few days and we could not even contact her. Our assumption was that her parents had confiscated her phone.

And when Rania was finally back she was acting weird toward Layan. The other way around as well. I wondered what I had missed for them to behave so different all of a sudden.

“Does your eye hurt a lot?”, I worried about Rania, softly touching her cheek.

“It's getting better. At least I can open it properly again”, she remarked.

Knowing that I could not do anything to protect her from her dad was making me furious. The helplessness was almost unbearable.

Out of the three of us I was definitely the lucky one in regards to our parents.

Rania and Layan exchanged a glare, which took me completely off guard. I was tired of this already.

“What happened between you two?”, I inquired.

“What do you mean?”, Layan brushed it off.

“You know exactly what I mean. There's something in between you. You're barely talking and always looking at each other like you might attack the other any moment”, I proclaimed.

“It's nothing”, Rania mumbled.

“Guys, please don't leave me hanging. What are you fighting about?”

“Just like you said it's between us”, Rania insisted.

“It's not if I'm in the middle of your stupid fight. Just solve it”, I requested.

“It's nothing to solve that easily”, Layan alluded.

I waited for her to continue.

“It's about you. Rania accused me that I followed you to the bathroom on purpose to have you to myself for a moment”, Layan proposed.

“So what? That's not that big of a deal, is it?”, I suggested.

But telling from their silence and body language, my assumption seemed to be wrong.

“It is?”, I wondered. “Why?”

“We love you, (f/n). Both of us”, Rania confessed.

“Yeah, I know. But I love you, too. So that shouldn't be an issue at all”, I shot back.

“No, we mean we love you more than just a friend. We love you romantically. So we were being a bit jealous and fighting over you”, Layan elaborated.

“Not exactly our proudest moment”, Rania added.

I was shocked for a moment, but quickly regained control. “What if I actually do love you both?”, I questioned.

“Are you serious?”, Rania reassured.

“Yeah”, I promised. “I love you both. I've known for a while, but was too scared to admit it. I didn't want to lose you.”

Layan let out a relieved laugh, tears pricking in her eyes. “I can't believe we fought when we could have solved it so easily.”

She then took a step closer to me and cupped my cheek. It felt like she was knowing exactly what was going through my mind when our eyes met.

Her lips on mine made all the tension leave my body that had been weighing me down mere minutes ago.

When Layan pulled away again, I could not help the smile on my face, which she reciprocated immediately.

I cupped her cheek for a moment and locked my eyes on hers to show her that I was seeing her, before I turned over to address Rania: “Are you okay with that?”

She nodded eagerly. So I did not hesitate to pull her into a kiss as well.

I had never imagined our relationship to work out like this, but I could not have dreamed of anything better.

--------------------

So what do you guys think about it?

Tag List: @sunwoniie

[cartoonrival]

like sasuke is clearly deeply unhappy in boruto which is fine, i honestly think its GOOD that he's not just like suddenly content with his life and himself after the finale of shippuden, its just also sort of insane that the post canon where he is no longer the focus is one where he's so potently miserable. he's clearly still reluctant to really face konoha. he still feels like an outcast or a bad apple, he still thinks he needs to atone for what he did as a teenager, despite the fact that he's been actively atoning for like a decade. but it'll never be enough. the only person he is not afraid to face and does not think he has failed is naruto, but even then he is still eager to isolate himself again, and i KNOW that its isolating and not just "being by himself" (sasuke has never been an outwardly emotional person (except under major duress), and while i believe a lot of this is repression its also just how he is, so no amount of healing would make him as open as, say, naruto, but i digress) because these are not the words of a happy man. "if she hates me its fine, because at least the future will be bright". "this is also a journey of atonement." naruto WANTS him to stay, believes its been long enough, the people of konoha don't hate him anymore (not sure how true this is but it's what naruto believes/wants to be true), but sasuke says they should stick to what they're meant to do, which means naruto as the hokage, because he is well loved and good with people, and sasuke in the shadows, because he is meant to be alone and unrecognized.

tbc i don't think that sasuke could be happy "settling down," i don't think he DOESNT like being on the move all the time, but the scene with naruto where he leaves konoha without saying goodbye to anybody is clearly not a scene where sasuke is content with his life in the way naruto is. he isn't doing this because he wants to, its because he thinks that he has to suffer in order to be good, and that the people of konoha wouldn't accept him any other way. it IS TRUE that sasuke has always been a big believer in sacrifice for the greater good and wouldn't consider his own happiness to be important compared to the missions he needed to go on, regardless of how deserving of happiness he considered himself to be, but i absolutely refuse to believe that, if he DID believe he deserved it, there has been NO TIME EVER that he could come home and just be regular. just for a little. there is absolutely something that is pushing him out of konoha, unrelated to "i have a mission to go on." there's still a disconnect.

WHICH. unfortunately. brings me to. end of shippuden. he receives a letter from naruto praising him for protecting the village even without being there, he thinks, "maybe it's time to come home." sometime before he comes home, he catches wind that naruto is getting married. he sends a letter with nothing on it other than "congratulations," and he does not come home. for like 4 more years. next time he's home for an extended period of time it's when sakura has already giving birth to sarada and he's helping raise her until she's juuuust old enough to start retaining memories before he fucks off again.

he doesn't want to be around sarada and sakura. he doesn't want them to worry about him or concern themselves with him. he doesn't want to be affectionate with sakura, who clearly DOES want to be affectionate with him. he considers the fact that he and sakura had a kid together to be the thing that most connects them, which is only significant in this case because anyone with eyes can tell that they are not really connected in basically any other way. it's like the ring he gives her in that dino arc. clearly since you wear a ring now to show we're married it means that we're married even though i'm not doing any of the other things a husband should do, but this ring makes up for that. clearly since we have a kid our hearts are connected and we really do love each other, even though i'm not doing any of the other things someone who really loves you would do. you could argue that his refusal to make any contact with sarada and sakura IS out of love, that he's afraid of hurting them and thinks he's protecting them by staying out of their lives (this is most likely what kishimoto intends), but this claim doesn't have any actual PRECEDENT outside of the fact that i'm being told that sasuke apparently loves her, the evidence for that being well they got married and had a kid. off screen.

i think he feels guilty that sarada even exists, because it's his fault she has no dad and it's his fault she inherited the uchiha's massive capacity for grief and love, it's his fault that sakura is raising her alone, and he's running from this because hopefully he can make up for it by doing good for the whole world since he cannot bring himself to make up for it by being there for his wife and daughter. "she has sakura, she'll be fine" because sakura is more her parent than he will ever/could ever be. he doesnt HATE sakura or sarada, to be very clear. he cares about them both as people, he fully respects sakura's strength, is proud when he sees sarada fighting well, he wants her to be happy and wants her to like him, he wishes he could be a better father and husband to her and sakura. just without having to be their father and husband.

boruto is not good unfortunately but due to the fact that naruto IS good and sasuke's characterization is very lovingly done in the original series it's critical to me (because i am not normal) that i figure out how to connect pieces that kishimoto could not be assed to properly connect. he seems to RECOGNIZE that he's betraying sasuke's characterization by making him have a kid w sakura due to the fact that everything sasuke does after that is p much exactly what i would expect him to do if, through some freak incident, he ended up having a kid with sakura. Anywho

[crepezinhos]

I was listening to a song and reading the lyrics, and then I realised that it reminded me Sooo much of your Checkmate. If you have time, can you check it out? unsure as to whether or not the english lyrics would be easy to find, so just in case;

And may I request another part of this series inspired by this song? If you want to, that's all. Really, all i wanted to do was share with you a piece that reminded me of your version of yan!scara

LOVELESS, it's a pointless night,

I want to be with you.

Love, love, love, a gap opens up,

That's all I want.

Quickly tell me the right answer,

The place where you feel good.

All I can do is something silly,

Just simple things, like rolling a cigarette.

Languid heaviness, body warmth,

There's nothing special beyond that.

Repeat after me,

"I want to see you."

Let me hear it,

"I want to see you."

Everything resembled love,

But it wasn't love.

In my foolishness,

I wanted to disappear.

LOVELESS, it's a pointless night,

I want to be with you.

Love, love, love, a gap opens up,

That's all I want, I don't want to be alone.

Even the words we piled up,

Were just a pretense of love.

Is that okay? Do you even understand that?

I want you to reveal more,

The ugly side of humans.

Even if you hide it in the rain, it'll still be exposed normally.

Can't you justify your desires?

Don't you want to see them?

Affection clouds up in a greenhouse,

I'm facing moist eyes.

Repeat after me,

"I won't go anywhere."

Let me hear it,

"I won't go anywhere."

Like eggs cracked with cracks,

As if connecting shells,

We're already too late.

Driving the final nail.

I don't want to see your true feelings,

Because I want to be with you.

Hate, hate, hate, it's all that's left,

I'll even love your dirty words.

In your parched skin color,

I'll drown,

I'll surely forget, so forget it,

Burn it into me.

If it will end someday,

Isn't it fine even now?

In our broken relationship,

Through those gaps.

Even if the spilled liquid seems like love,

It's just an illusion.

When I'm with you,

I seem hopeless.

LOVELESS, it's a pointless night,

I want to be with you.

Love, love, love, it's all there is,

Please hold me, I don't want to be alone.

I don't need things like love,

Just pretend it's love.

I probably won't say it again,

Stay here.

On a night that's not about love,

Let's step out of bounds.

Love, love, love, a gap opens up,

My red body begins to melt away.

Even the words we piled up,

Just pretend it's love.

So let me hear it, with that voice,

Hurt me.

Hello! Since this request was pretty much similar to my last one (who has been waiting for it for barely a month now…), I thought it would be more fair to respond it rather than this.

I really like the song and how disturbingly well it reminds me of Checkmate (since it was an idea that has run through my mind for a LONG time, like… before I even made my first post here) and I really did wish I could make a post about this fucked-up scenario… but I really just cannot work on Checkmate anymore. 💔

Although I had a lot of fun writing Checkmate, it unfortunately flopped and remained to flop in its prequel and sequel, and it’s not pleasant to see all my hard work on it turning out to be 40 likes in an average. I am really thankful that at least those people who manifested their appreciation were loyal to all posts related to it, but I really just don’t want to work so much on it to get just less and less recognition (although my last post about it didn’t really flop for some reason? 😭) especially when I have SO many fun ideas to work on.

Checkmate is also the kind of story that is better with an open end since I believe many people had different ideas for their future, and indeed, they’re all fun. Fluff, angst or purely smut… I’ve thought about them all in my slumbers, really.

Maybe in the future, when I feel I have a better structure in my blog, I can write an ending to it, but I’d rather let it rest for now (especially because I’m going for a 3-week trip at my home country to visit my family and friends so uh… REQUESTS CLOSED!!). If you would like to write something about it, I’d love to read it (with proper credits of course)!

But thank you so much for the music and request! I really appreciate that someone spent time thinking about my works after like 3 years of pure rejection, it truly makes me kick my feet in excitement whenever I get a request 🥹❤️‍🩹

[dustyoo10]

Very tired and I can't sleep, this thought is stuck in my head and normally I just bottle it up and let it fester but I have an outlet now where I can talk about these sort of things, so might as well. Hopefully it'll help me sleep.

Warning for discussions about death and some pretty serious stuff:

In 2022 I lost my cat Bailey. This was easily the most painful time in my life, and it was my first real experience with loss. I had lost relatives before, pets too, but never like this. It was about 2 months of excruciating pain and anxiety.

We would let her out and she would usually hang in the backyard or front yard. She loved to sunbathe. Part of me blames my dad for her death but I feel any one of us could have made this mistake, I still struggle with it. I should have looked, too. He didn't check to see if she was inside when he set out her dinner. She was stuck out there all night during a heatwave.

When I woke up in the morning and noticed she wasn't inside, I tried to see if she was outside, I found her at the side of the house on the hot concrete, barely awake. She was struggling to breathe and her skin was loose and saggy. I picked her up and brought her inside and told my dad something was wrong with her. He insisted she was fine and that her raspy breathing was actually "purring". She could hardly move. I woke my mom and told her what was happening, and I had to convince her to take her to the emergency vet. It felt like no one saw she was dying except me.

After a checkup and some shots she appeared to be doing better, I believe they said it was dehydration. I had stayed up all night and I stayed up even longer watching her. That's what hurts the most. I was awake during the night when she was out there on her own.

Regardless, this marked a complete turn in her health. She was in good shape for 14, but that drastically fell after that day. I didn't go to our family reunion so that I could watch after her. Honestly, I don't know how my family was fine with her being alone for several days whilst dying. Even if I didn't care for her as much as I did, I wouldn't leave anyone like that.

I struggled to get her to eat anything other than sips of tuna water, and it seemed like she never slept. She couldn't, she was too weak. I couldn't sleep either. I've always had bad insomnia, but this was much worse.

A few weeks later I convinced my mom to take her to the vets again. I was adamant that if we just took her to the vets they could fix her, even though a part of me deep down knew that wasn't true. The morning we were supposed to go I was in the restroom when I noticed that I didn't feel anything in my chest. my heart wasn't beating. I had a vasovagal response, it's when your blood pressure drops rapidly due to immense anxiety, which had never happened to me before. It was a good minute before I nearly collapsed downstairs. I was pale and struggling to breathe while my mom was trying to help me recover.

The vet ended up being closed that day, and we only learned whilst we were in the car with Bailey, who was extremely distressed. I think it was a good thing. If they were open it would've served no more than to prolong the inevitable and to keep her suffering. There was no fix for this. I believe she had air in her lungs, from the post-mortem scan. Some sort of cancer or disease she had from being a barn kitten. So there really was nothing we could do. Well, there was something I could do.

When we got back home I sat and thought, and I decided to take initiative for once rather than waiting for something to happen, or hoping some miracle would fall down from the sky. I went to my mom and told her she needed to be euthanized while tearing up. My mom didn't say it, but she already knew this. She went along with my idea that something could help her so as to not upset me. At the vet she'd either have been euthanized there, or told that she doesn't have long regardless.

She called a mobile vet so that she could be put to sleep her at home. We brought her out to the deck for the last time, and I sat with her, constantly wiping snot from my nose, and trying my best to enjoy that last moment with her. At this point she was falling apart, she could hardly keep herself concious.

The vet came and put her to sleep. When the syringe went it she bit down on my hand, leaving a mark that's still there. Then her eyes just sort of glazed and she began to drift. She couldn't get the euthanasia needle into the right spot in our house, so she took Bailey to her RV and did it there. She let us come see her one last time and I regret that. I put my ear on her chest and felt nothing, so I left really quickly after that. My mom came over to me while Bailey was leaving our driveway to be cremated and hugged me, and I started sobbing while she held me.

I went inside, got in the shower, curled up and started crying harder than I ever had in my life. I wasn't good enough to her, there was a lot of things i didn't do right, and that was the first day in my 19 years of life that it truly dawned on me that people will die. You don't get an infinite amount of time to make up for your mistakes, and you don't get infinite time with them.

In a way it was both sad and relieving. She was in pain for so long. Now she could finally sleep, and so could I. I no longer had to worry about waking up and finding her dead, or laying in bed restless because I didn't want to leave her alone. She died on September 6th, 2022.

Over a month later, I got B.B. after much convincing from my mom. Bailey was originally my sister's cat, but my mom ended up taking responsibilities for her since my sister was only 14, although i had to convince her that I was older and more responsible. I had lived the majority of my life with a cat, and a part of it was just empty without her. B.B. wasn't meant to fill that hole in my heart that Bailey left, but to give me something else to love, and this time I would do everything right.

Apologies for anyone who didn't want to read something like this.

[lillybearrie]

Wanna say this outright. This is not (trying not to be at least) an Icarus apologist post you can read it however you would like however they are in the wrong they never should have gone after Jamie they shouldn't be listening to Fable there was no logical reason to kill anyone the should not be fighting for the sake of "daddy said it'll be ok in the end" this is simply how I see where they're headspace may be and how that influences their actions because for one i go abababa and for 2 o think it's important to see their logic however twistedand flawed and just factual incorrect it may be. This us also not me condemning Rae's actions today quite frankly I applaud his restraint it was admirable

Now back to your regularly scheduled Icarus psychoanalysis:

Icarus feels out of control and when they don't have control in their life they act erratically because if they have nothing else then they can have their identity as The Lunatic who kills an tortures for the hell of it and they lean into it because well they're already in the hole might as well keep digging maybe then when they're down so far those at the top will stop shouting stop throwing down rope stop begging them to come back up maybe at some point they'll see it's worthless to try and pull them out they aren't worth it they've never been worth it.

"You not worth another reset"

Rae his brother his friend his family the one who has always always cared when no one else did when no one else would who saw hope were there wasn't any the man who has held him and he has held so many times on some of the darkest days no longer believes in him. And why should he? They killed his nephew for fuck's sake! He finally realized what everyone has always said is true. Icarus is the unsalvageable insane monster who has convinced themself that death is temporary can be temporary will be temporary if they just kill a few more. They're erratic They're dangerous and they don't care who they're hurting in the process. And now Rae knows it. But it's ok they don't need Rae and his soft words and gentle touch they don't need his kind smiles or open doors they have fable they have their dad the man just like them the man whose going to fix everything the mortal with the power of over half the pantheon in the palm of his hand Their dad will fix everything they don't need anyone else...yeah they... they don't need anyone their perfectly fine on their own.

But you know who does need someone? Vanda yeah Vanda needs help she's injured and that wing isn't going to heal at all is she keeps flapping around like that. So Icarus sits out in the rain calming her speaking gently as they coaxed her into their hands holding her gently against their chest as they make it back inside and they take a look at that wing giving her seeds when she cooperated. Icarus wonders how long she's been like this out in the rain all alone with a broken wing. Icarus stays awake for longer then they have been in recent past because Vanda needs the attention and maybe their being a bit to careful but better safe than sorry especially with wing like that you have to be very gentle. Icarus knows how take care of their birds

(This is not about the birds)

[wings-of-flying]

*clears throat* 43 with Ayva and Lizzie perhaps? :)

43 - “I don’t want to have to live without you. I can’t”

The bedroom was dark, the sliver of light from under the door acting as the sole barrier between this faint illumination and complete blackness. Though the room itself was different - it always was - the situation was very familiar to Lizzie. It had been repeated a thousand times before. She lay, tucked beneath the covers, limbs tangled with the woman beside her, in a knot she never wished to undo.

It was difficult to see Ava's face, in the dimness, but Lizzie watched her nonetheless. No matter how many times she saw them like this, she wouldn't ever stop being in awe. The curve of her jaw; the freckles that dotted her cheeks like stars; the little scar that cut through her top lip. It was all fascinating. Little things that made her perfect.

Though they did not speak, it was far from silent. Below, the tavern still was serving, even this late into the night, and all the sounds of tankards slamming, drunken singing and every other ambient noise that you could think of echoed all the way to the rented rooms above. It was sort of comforting to know the world continued without them.

Ava shifted a little, freeing her arm from beneath Lizzie. They sat up and Lizzie grew cold in their absence. Something changed, in that moment. She wasn't sure why until Ava spoke.

"We need to stop this." Her voice was clear and unwavering. She'd been thinking through her words for a while.

Lizzie sat up too, leaning forwards to try and meet Ava's eyes. It stung a little when they turned away, hanging their legs off the side of the bed.

"You're serious," Lizzie realised.

Ava exhaled sharply. "Of course I'm serious. Can't you see that this has gone too far?" She looked back over their shoulder. Their eyes were pleading. "This was never meant to last this long."

"Something's changed. You've never said anything like this before, something's changed. What's happened?"

"Nothing's happened! I just-"

Lizzie shook her head. "I don't believe you. You were acting weirdly all day, what happened?"

Ava groaned, hiding her head in her hands. Lizzie edged closer. She'd never seen the Ferin frustrated like this, not at her at least.

"What changed?"

Raising her head slightly, Ava met Lizzie's eyes. "I'm getting promoted."

Despite it all, Lizzie let out a laugh. "Well that's great. Congratulations. I don't see how-"

"I'll be a Captain, Liz. Away at sea for months on end. Doing Raft's most important jobs." They spoke gravely, and Lizzie soon realised what was coming next. "They'll want me to kill pirates. And I don't get a say in it."

Shit.

They'd both known something like this would happen eventually. It was inevitable really. But they pretended otherwise. It'd worked out fine, this game of pretend, for nearly a year now. It had to stop at some point.

"We have to stop this," Ava repeated.

Something broke in Lizzie's chest. "I don't want to have to live without you. I-" Her voice faltered as tears pricked her eyes. "I can't. I just can't."

"I know." Ava's voice was quiet, barely louder than the noise from downstairs. "I love you, Liz. Which is why this has to stop. You have to stay away from me, because I can't bear the thought of having to hurt you."

The silence was deafening.

"I love you t-"

"Don't say it. It'll make this so much harder if you say it." Ava stood up and began pulling on their clothes. An end. Lizzie's heart ached.

"I'll see you on the battlefield," She said quietly.

"Goodbye." Was the response.

When Ava left, despite Lizzie's wistful hopes, she didn't once look back. They didn't see each other again until Shatterskull. And that was the true end.

[notmorbid]

revenge.

dialogue prompts from revenge: eleven dark tales by yōko ogawa.

is anybody here?

i know pretty well how things work around here.

you should sleep. as much as you want.

grief has taught me how to read people.

mold can be quite beautiful.

you're always asking questions i don't know how to answer.

where does death come from?

i was hoping you'd come with me somewhere.

it'll be painless.

i've been alone all this time.

you look different on television.

i was afraid you were angry with me.

you can't imagine how it helps to have you here.

____ didn't even have the decency to die properly.

there's some strength left in these old hands.

make me look good.

in all my years, i've never once been in the newspaper.

any little detail could be helpful.

did you notice anything suspicious? anything at all?

if you try too hard, it will never work.

i'm sorry. i shouldn't have told you.

i don't like to see you suffering.

why do you suppose giraffes have such long necks?

did you ever write your story?

i never get tired of looking at you.

it's your mistake. you fix it.

i never said a word of what happened. not to anyone.

one lie leads to another. you should know.

who wouldn't want you?

you needn't be so timid.

tell me if i hurt you in any way.

i don't think anyone noticed.

you have every right to be angry.

it all happened so suddenly. i can hardly believe it myself.

why is everyone dying?

it sounded like something heavy being dragged across the floor.

i want so much to be useful.

if you think of anything, please get in touch.

do you find it amusing that someone died?

i always go left, when i have to choose.

i tried calling, but no one answered.

the desires of the human heart know no reason or rules.

you have no common sense at all.

this is a bit much, for a kid.

be patient. it's going to be fantastic.

does it hurt?

aren't you scared?

i have to be on guard all the time.

nothing you study will ever turn out to be useless.

not lost in grief. lost in thought.

in the end, i missed my chance.

don't stand there all day. come and let me look at you.

it's true? you're really here?

you haven't changed a bit.

are you eating? you have to keep up your strength.

all of a sudden you're grown and worrying about me, instead of the other way around.

it was a beautiful death.

i want you to have it. it's the only thing i have to leave you.

i don't want to make things more complicated than they already are.

jealousy seems to make me suffer in the most unexpected ways.

how could you feel jealous of someone so pathetic?

is it dead?

i'm afraid i'm disturbing you.

you must stay with us. we need you here.

where did you come from?

are you on vacation?

has your work been going well?

what sorts of things do you write about?

why did you come up here?

you look fine. like a professional model.

you can never be too careful.

why would you leave without saying goodbye?

i'm not sure you realized what that meant to me.

what a wonderful house you have.

my past is full of ghosts.

could you play something for me?

i simply wanted to hear your voice.

is something wrong? did something happen?

tell me. i'll worry if you don't.

[kannonymous]

The Art of Murder: stage play of the hero.

CW: CHILD ABUSE, CHILD PORNOGRAPHY, VIOLENCE, IMPLIED SEXUAL CONTENTS, PEDOPHILIA, MURDER, PROFANITIES.

PROLOGUE

Children likes role-playing and turning themselves into big one such as hero. There are times where the adults can't jump into the world of fantasies, so the child created a hero, they became the hero.

This world is practically the biggest stage for them to play with pure imaginations. But is it really fine to get there completely unarmed? Because who would've thought that the stage could be the worst place to get into, that the leading character would suffered the long, eerie nightmaresㅡturning the illusion into reality. The hero is a child, would he survive?

Only time can answer.

ACT I : STATE OF THE FIRST FUNERAL

The curtain never falls on magicㅡstage never shakes down on the true act of manipulation. He, the hero, was born on the stage naked. He was a born star, now a porn star, forced him to stay undressed.

One, two, check. Camera's taking bodies all checked. Three, four, ca-ching! Old filthy men joined in. They sent you dollars for an sensual poses, oh, how exciting, disgusting.

Night was the longest time ever that he wished it'll going to be over, soon, or just give him the right to rule over; the live, his life. Women behind the lighting said, "baby, spread it more". Close to her, men holding the camera inaudibly whispered, "just listen to your mother".

For fuck's sake, go fuck yourselves.

Said, "he seemed enjoying it tho", how he wished he could spit on those faces like a well-paid actor throwing hatred. When he realizes, his skin got red, swollen, by the morning. As soon as he came back to reality, he was thereㅡa funeral of John Doe. That's what you call unidentified men, and he claimed himself as one, he believes that one day he will die like he's obscured.

There is the young hero, standing by the sea, talking with the surf blah blah. He spoke as if the entities listened, doesn't matter because he listens. The bells sounded in the state funeral, murderer and widow a pair, the two suspects stood behind the coffin, wailing in badly-paid grief.

"Who’s the corpse in it, dear? Is it you, or the dream you’ve long buried?"

Both, dear mother. It was me, you, father and the dream we call family. He laid on the ground first and heard the world revolving step by step into putrefaction.

I AM THE GOOD HERO, I HOLD NOTHING BUT LOSS AND GRIEF.

SOMETHING’S ROTTEN INSIDE, HE WANTS TO BE FREE FROM SORROW.

Eyes openedㅡhe was wide awake to watch the sun touches his pale skin, it turned into human colors again. The said God stopped him from damned fate called death. Everything came to live soon as the night gone, tragedy left the scenes like it never happened.

"Sleepyhead. Aren't you going to school?"

Weren't you going to die, mother?

ACT II: THE SECOND RINGS OF BELL.

Night comes, the reaper is on ceiling, hovering above the bare skin of a little boy. He was forced to get on stage while suffering from terrible ill, but unexpectedly the audience yelled, God, that was the best face he ever made. Go on, these checks are all yours.

It was like another sound of money, made the pair of humans, inhumane, were greedy for more so they sold too many. Overshown an art of violence, turning blue into the new color of arousals. The devils cheered, he silently died.

No, the hero wasn't even get paid, but he had to pull out an act like the main character.

Worst state of human ever was when they beg to die, easily, ironically. Neck almost get broken, but his wrists certainly had. Bodies are like being skinned, carved openㅡleaking out a soul, lonely and unwanted. He was bleeding out, crying, scream on top of his lungs, and yet people think he wasn't doing enough.

The leading male, a hero, usually meet hardships to eventually rises. In his scenario, the play’s exposition show people a never ending misery; he is running circle in the midst crises. It's happened all at once, he wished he was a hero who's able to save all at once, ironic.

Tragically father was the loss in his left hand, and mother was the embodiment of grief on the other side. He never knew what is safety, home didn't make him feel secure. This family line got him feel like breaking his neck on the beer hall bench. What if I die, what’s my corpse to them, anyway?

And when the morning comes, the bell makes the same sound, waking up the dead; unsalvageable fragments of soul in cemetery. He was all naked. but still wearing hat ‘cause his skull has one hole too many. Voices are coming out asking, is one state funeral not enough, you senile old fool?

WHO IS THE CORPSE IN THE COFFIN? FOR WHOM IS THERE SUCH A HUE AND CRY.

"Wake up, dear. You'll have visitors once every two nights from now on"

ACT III: THE LAST.

He knocked on the wall, several times, counted the numbers and bloods coming out at fiftyㅡonly half way through to the perfect number he wants. His dead eyes wandering around the cramped storage room that somehow refurbished into single bedroomㅡhis prison, a casket for one. He scratches the wall, anxious. Grief slowly turned into anger, a hunger, he could eat whoever opens the door.

"You look just as horrible as they said, little bug. Just a right course for dinner"

He barely can catch the air when two men in suit entered the room. Click, locked. In one second those big hands already crave for a choke. You smell like trash I thrown up this morning, said the hero. The next second he's already on the floor.

"Really? Is this how you throw it, hm?"

His bones feels like broken at some parts but he laughs eerily, draw an annoyed look on their faces. The first man forcefully grab him by his chin, make strong grip on it to intimidate him. But his voice just gets louder like he was mocking them. One slap, two and more, his nose starts bleeding and yet he won't stop laughing from the pain he feels.

It's like a show of dummies trying to crush a child in the palm of their hand. One of them fucked his mouth to shut him off. Hurt. He decided to make it hurt, he bites. Bold enough, that was enough to make him ended up get tied up tight.

"I paid a lot for this. You better be good, I know how to find your arteries" Knives, needles, liquids, he couldn't tell how much they brought just to play with a kid. "You'll be perfect to be stored as a herbarium" said the one with glasses.

Skilled hands made the best of art. The scalpel danced on his right arm, circles around it make a swirl wounds; it is red, beautiful. They sucked the blood, trace along the cuts like bitches having their treats, he thinks it's hilarious that his eyes starts dropping tears. His voice pitched higher, filled the cramped coffin.

"Oh no, you're wounded, ladybug. Though it's pretty, I think we need to close this incision on your skin"

They stitched it like he's a ripped jeans. He can't really do anything but to enjoy it, he came, to be honest he felt good from the fear and pain. "Godness, you naughty little freak"

That was the longest night, the worst ever since he was numerously resurrected from deathㅡslowly changing him into something else, the person you probably don't wanna cross by on the street. That was the craziest night, indeed. Who would hook up while getting sewn on the neck? He had it; on the neck, on his lips, along his arms skin.

The bell rings again as they left. That wasn't in state of funeral, but the awakening of something worse than a monster.

ACT ??? DEATH IS AN ART, AND BLOOD SHOULD BE THE PAINT.

I believe that life is a play and the world’s a stage. I claimed I am the hero, so it's time for me to take over and break the whole stage.

He stood there, a little kid in black and red, his pupils are bright red. He is what you'd visualize ladybug as a human. His lips mumbles a mourning song as he gets closer to his father's ears, whispering, you shoul've been buried alive with dishonor for can't even control that whore and protect your son. Atone.

I ALMOST DIED IN THAT ROOM FOR FUCKING MONEY I NEVER TASTED. NOW, ATONE.

Father was tied to the chair, too easy to make a trap for an alcoholic, too easy to manipulate a loser who's already drowned in guilt. Given two choices, the old man decided to hang his uniformed flesh and bones. Neat, almost like going on his own wedding. Isn't it just right to make mother the bride?

He made the fest once again. Mother's breasts a bed of roses, her lap a nest of snakes. He held back a little when he choked, in the edge of dying he spit on her and said, you will die wearing this gown. He never hated his mother, she hated him first, thinking of him as an object to make money. You should also die in the way I want.

He smear the rags of her dress into the earth which his father has become one with the rags; her face, her belly, her breasts. Now he takes thee his mother in his, his father’s invisible trace. He strangled her cry with his lips.

Now go, go to your wedding, whore. Broad in the sun shining on the living and the dead.

"Please, stop" NO, DON'T YOU DARE TO CRY. LAUGH. YOU HAVE TO LAUGH.

"I'll set you free, please spare me" I SAID LAUGH, and then his mother laughs, a really bad one, it gets him irked. Shall he correct it, he takes knife he brought and cut her throat, helping mother to sound more harmonious.

She coughed blood, she's wailing, triggers a mad rage. He screams, I TOLD YOU TO LAUGH. He no longer cares of how she sounds, she better shut her mouth off rather than ruining the feast. The blade's stabbing throat until it's destroyed. She's completely muted. Before him lies an enchanting art, his eyes flickering in excitement watching how her lips slowly turned colors. Blue matches death more, he thinks.

Now it's his turn to laugh, then he laughed. Ah, what a happy family, glad now you have died blissfully.

That was the art of writing, he had done the art for painting fear on their faces.

WASH THE MURDER FROM THY FACE, PRINCE. MAKE A CHEERFUL FACE FOR BEGINNING AFTER THE END.

EPILOGUE

So, has the time answered the earlier question? It took years to know how would the story end and where it's leading toㅡ new beginning after the dark days.

It costs a monster to be the hero today.

Perhaps those who watches are questioning the morality, right or wrong on the ways, but he's being called hero not for immersing sins. He ain't God nor he trusted any deities. He is the hero for saving the one worth of life, murdering those who deserves it.

Is taking bad people's life a sin? He left the question hanging, he left the stage with the curtains closed behind.

I'LL GET ON ANOTHER SHOW TO TAKE MY REVENGE.

[noxtivagus]

i looked at my screen n i really just Froze oh my god ffxiv hflkajlskdj

[myunghology]

⛸️ ︴SLOWLY, OUR HEARTS TOUCHED.

summary ➺ random knights (enstar unit) lyrics describing your relationships with random genshin boys.

genre ➺ fluff, comfort..

au ➺ none?

proofread ➺ nope.

note ➺ i made this because knights songs make me cry every day. i am also a loner everyday so add my discord or follow my twitter, my discord is mihai #0241 and my twitter is @/miihaiya ps. i need friends and i am desperate, i cannot start conversations well... `` mentions of death

🎋 ︴XIAO

“never being expressed, these words that are buried in my heart.” — silent oath

okay, i know the lyric sounds kinda sad, but think of it like this: xiao always pushes people away right? because he doesn't want to get attached to them, cause he thinks he'll lose them sooner or later, if he does, the only result he'll get is you dying a few years later, he never expresses himself properly— that's the problem. he loves you dearly but can't express it properly, his main coping mechanism is distancing himself away from you. so you finally had to confront him, 'why do you keep avoiding me? did i do something wrong?' you asked, "..it's not that." he turned his head, not wanting to answer properly. let's be honest, it's better to tell someone how you honestly feel about them before you die, but true, getting attached so easily means that it'll be harder to deal with your death if he does get attached to you, he doesn't want to push you away. he wants you to be with him forever. he thinks it's his fault for falling in love with a mortal. don't get me wrong, all ends well of course, since you've told him that the archons will lead you back to him if you die or not. a few, no, maybe a decade had past after your death, xiao was just a shell of a person now, still looking for you even though you had died, he has faith in you, you know? then he finally spotted you again, the love of his life that had died decades ago, near the terrace of wangshuu inn. he could feel his eyes tear up, biting his lip so no tears could fall out, he ran to you and gave you a tight hug. he didn't care how much you two had to seperate, even for a long time, he doesn't care. he just wants you to be lead back to him in the end. “i still look for you, sleepless nights, thinking about you, and you finally came back to me.”

🍁 ︴KAZUHA

“that's right, you just need to stay by my side and i won't leave you.” — silent oath

“so your just gonna dedicate this to them because of their trauma?” yeah. stay by his side and he won't leave you, as long as you don't leave him, he's perfectly fine. if you do leave him, by death or by choice, he's gonna become a shell of a person either way. he's already trembling, it's already more than he can take, first tomo, now you? he's clutching his chest, he's already been through so much. if you left by death: he's shaking, crying even. beidou can hear his sobs, he doesn't care anymore, he lost you. doesn't blame you, it's okay, he'll be with you soon, he believes... if by choice, he doesn't blame you as well. you've gotten sick of him, huh? it's okay, he understands. he's no stranger to that result. but.. if you don't leave him, all is well. he's a man of his word, he doesn't leave you if you dont leave him. he's.. glad he met you, a blessing from the archons, he calls you. of course, your happy you've met him as well.

⚡ ︴AETHER

“if you can be yourself without shame, it's alright.” — fight for judge

if you've read my 'types of troupes with them' and remember the aether one, im bringing it back, you can also read this one even if you haven't read it yet. as i was saying, aether wants you to be free, he doesn't want you to have trouble talking to other people, but of course, he considers your feelings as well. he understands why won't you talk to people, even for the most stupidest reasons ever. he won't push you to do it if you don't want to, he isn't that type of person, get it? buuuuuut, he helps you when you can't talk to other people, he gets used to your body language if you wanna say something or not, he talks for you as well! paimon does too.. you're happy that they do. what could you do without the both of them? aether is proud of you once you soften up to people, but sometimes, he just wants to see that sight from himself, you can't blame him though, you want him to yourself too, since he's always so busy doing quests, commissions and everything. at the end of the day, you guys always make it up for the lost time, and i mean always.

🔮 ︴SCARAMOUCHE

“that's right, if we can't understand each other, then we just need to display ourselves.” — fight for judge

don't get me wrong, fights with him are common, but it doesn't mean you guys won't resolve it easily.. even though most of your fights are caused by him, he's stubborn. well, you would already know. the harbingers find it kinda impossible how you two always make up after a intense fight, 'how'd you do that?' they would ask at least seven times a week. mostly, your fights are just because of misunderstandings, of course you both get mad at each other, the results are ignoring each other for the whole day, but if you ask me, don't tell him i told you this, but it's mostly him who comes back to you at the end of the day. how could you resist your bowl-cut hair boyfriend? more like, who are you to resist your bowl-cut haired boyfriend? he flicks your forehead sometimes if you ever try to bring it up, he's just in denial, don't worry. but he knows what your saying is true deep down inside him.

©miihai

[kairakeiji]

oikawa thinks there's a lot wrong with him.

despite his confident demeanor and natural charm, oikawa doesn't believe that he's what others make him out to be. he's not the great king nor is he a force to be reckoned with. he's just oikawa, a setter from a small school that constantly missed out on punching their ticket to nationals. oikawa doesn't blame himself for his team's losses, or at least he tries not to, but in every game of his that he's analyzed, he's more prone to noticing the wrong than the right.

that set was too low.

if he tossed it a bit higher maybe they would've scored the point.

he put too much power into that serve.

if he moved even a second quicker he could have saved the ball.

no matter how many witty and genius plays he saw throughout a game, his focus consistently stayed on the wrong. so when his last volleyball season ended, when he finished his final days in high school, when he finally got the chance to start fresh, oikawa so desperately wanted to be in the right. he wanted to stop seeing the wrong, he wanted his past failures to not haunt him or feel like a burden as he did his best to move on, so much so that he was willing to pack up his life and risk it all. it was perfect, it was his dream fresh start, a way to finally be at peace with all of his wrongs.

"argentina huh?"

but in order to do so, he would have to leave behind the one thing that felt right.

oikawa froze as he saw you at his front door. "i did tell you i was leaving," he replied.

"i know," you smiled softly, trying to hide any hints of sadness at your boyfriend's departure. "you told me months ago and i'm still in shock."

and oikawa can only laugh softly. "you know-"

"tooru you don't need to explain," you interrupted. "i understand, you want your fresh start, you want to follow your dreams." you sighed. "i just didn't think those dreams of yours would lead you to a new country."

oikawa had always been grateful for your support, whether it was at games or in his school life or even at simple practice, you had been by his side every step of the way. for every victory, every loss, every single second the boy had been dedicated to the game in high school, he felt you supporting him and cheering him on. oikawa had always been grateful for your support.

but he's never been more grateful than he is right now.

"it's gonna be tough," oikawa sighed.

"long distance?" you asked.

"yeah, long distance."

and at that you scoffed jokingly rolling your eyes as you replied. "please, it'll be much easier for me considering you won't be following me around like a lost puppy." but oikawa knows you well, he knows that you're trying to be happy for him despite your true feelings.

"i don't follow you around," he counters crossing his arms. "if anything you're following me."

"oh really?" you smile.

"really," oikawa replies.

and you only sigh, "well it'll be fine then because now i don't have to spend an insane amount of hours in a sweaty volleyball gym."

you're making excuses, oikawa thinks to himself, you're creating reasons that you aren't sure are true.

you're scared.

"you can just see it through my phone," oikawa tries.

"if i'll even be awake," you laugh. "the time difference is insane."

"you barely sleep anyway!" oikawa counters.

"yeah and i'm not going to give up those precious hours to watch you hit balls in a stuffy gym."

and oikawa sighs with a smile on his lips, "you're pathetic."

"and you love me for it."

you're right, he does, he loves you more that words could describe and if he got the chance he would love you every day until his last breath. no matter how much wrong and how much loss oikawa faced in his life, you were the one thing that he thought could fix his life in an instant. you felt right, felt perfect. you made every wrong, every mistake in his life worth it.

but in order to follow his passions, to chase what he's been dreaming of for years, he'd have to leave you behind, the one thing that oikawa's certain he got right.

"tooru," you started, grabbing for his hand.

"what is it?"

and then you met his gaze, your eyes brimming with tears and a sorrowful smile on your face.

and oikawa instantly knew what you were going to say next.

"i think our time is up."

it's not. oikawa refuses to believe that it is.

"with the time differences and the big life changes, i don't think that this will work in the long run."

it will, oikawa knows it. he knows that you both will pour in the time and effort into your relationship just like you always did.

"we can do it," he tries. "i know us, i know you, we can do it."

and you only sigh in response.

neither of you wanted to call it quits. but right now it felt like you were both on the edge of a cliff, staring down at the chasm at the bottom, too scared to take that final jump.

"i think we should-"

"come with me."

you blink, "what?"

and he only repeats, "come with me."

his hands are trembling, his heart is beating rapidly.

"i have an apartment, a place just for the two of us, it's not too far from the university campus and knowing your scores you can get in easily."

but his tone is certain, it doesn't waiver one bit because oikawa tooru knows he would be a fool to let someone like you slip out of his grasp.

"we can go to the same university and you can still watch all my games."

there's no way in hell oikawa's going to lose you.

"you want me to come with you?" you ask.

"i do," he replies.

oikawa think he's gotten so much wrong in his life.

but this, you, felt like the one thing he's truly gotten right.

"come with me to argentina."

heyyy thank u so so much for reading!! i hope you like this as much as i do

reblogs are so so appreciated thank u <33