#it's bad enough that i can't right fluff in Nesta pov but Cassian's is 110% worse

[secretlynestaarcheron]

Chapter Fifteen + Sixteen

The Selection Au -acotar 

Thank you for all of your patience. 

tagged: @justgiu12 @blxckbeaks @justabunchoffandoms @swagbookmaster @my-fan-side @heyitsrhysand @acourtofmarauders h

Chapter Fifteen: Nesta 

Nesta opens the door slightly out of breath, kicking the luggage that was still by the door farther into the living room. “You’re acting like you’ve never had a conversation with him,” Cassian retorts behind her with an eye roll. 

“Shut up,” she murmurs, and he lets out a loud laugh. She had never heard him actually laugh before just sarcastic chuckles here and there. “This is my home, he’s meeting my family, I was nervous for you to meet them too.” 

He raises an eyebrow but before he can say anything else she throws the door open. “Oh Nesta, I didn’t realize you would be here,” Liz says, before holding up a basket. “My mom wanted me to bring over some food for the girls, I am glad you here!” 

She motions for her to come in, closing the door behind her, as she turns she sees Elain peeking around the corner and Feyre leaning against the doorframe cutting up her french toast, at least she was using a plate this time. 

“Cassian, this is Liz, her family owns the bakery by my work,” Nesta says to Cassian before turning towards Liz, “Liz , this is Cassian, he’s a captain of the guard for the palace.” 

She falls into a curtsey quickly and Nesta wants to laugh at the expression on his face, she assumes he had never had any curtsey to him before and he wasn’t quite sure what to do. “That's really not necessary,” he retorts. 

There's another knock and Nesta turns on her heel to answer it as Liz moves to the kitchen. Liz says something but Feyre shushes her and Elain explains that they were waiting for the prince. “Nesta! Our lovely Nesta, it’s so good to see you! We’ve been watching you on the television!” Ms Cohen as she pushes into the doorway followed by another lady holding a basket. 

Cassian stands straighter as the woman pushes through but Nesta waves her hand. “These are my neighbors, Ms Blain and Ms Cohen,” Nesta explains. 

“Who is this tall drink of water,” Ms Cohen says, making a show of looking him up and down which makes him more uncomfortable than he already was. “I would have guessed the prince but I know the television doesn’t add that much muscle.” 

Ms Blain rolls her eyes and looks over at Nesta, “We just wanted to bring some food over for your sisters, we had no idea you would be here,” Ms Blain replies. Nesta knew how gossip-y they both were, they probably saw the car sitting outside of her house and wanted to come and see if the prince was here. 

“Oh what is that smell? You must be having guests,” Ms Cohen says, making her way to the kitchen. Ms Blain smiles apologetically at her before following her into the kitchen. She can hear Ms Cohen critiquing and complimenting all the food as she tried it. 

“Welcome to my life, you will not get any privacy even if you wanted it,” Nesta explains to Cassian, feeling exasperated. As the day progressed more neighbors and people that Nesta knew came where it got to the point that you were constantly brushing shoulders with someone. 

Nesta escaped to the backyard, sitting amongst the flowers that Elain had been working on while she was gone. “Rhysand called, there were a few things his dad wanted him to finish up but he’s getting on a plane now,” Cassian says, coming out to find her out in the garden. “You aren’t much of a party person, are you?”

She shrugs, “It’s more so that I was feeling claustrophobic, and I know that none of those people are here for me, my family, or even my dad. They’re here for a glimpse of the prince, or the chance to be on television,” she replies, leaning back on her elbow and staring up at the sky. 

“Do you want me to kick them out? I can tell them it’s a safety hazard,” Cassian offers. 

She shakes her heads at the suggestion, “No, it’s okay, I just needed some air,” she replies, rolling an idea in her head before saying. “Would it be a safety hazard if I went on a walk? The palace is great and everything but I really missed my run down town.”

He laughs and then pretends to mull over the idea. “That could probably be arranged, especially if you have the Captain of the guard escorting you,” he replies as he reaches forward to help her stand, she rolls her eyes at the comment but reaches forward for his hand.

“Are you okay?” he asks as they make their way down the road. 

She shrugs, kicking at a rock, as she looks over at him. “Yeah, I will be. I guess it’s just hitting me that he’s really gone, I always hoped that he would wake up one day and be the father he used to be,” she replies, looking off into the distance as the sun began to set. “It’s not helping that none of those people are actually there for my father or even me, they’re there in case they have a chance to be televised.” 

He’s quiet as he listens to her ramble, she’s glad, she didn’t think she could handle him trying to comfort her. She wanted to be angry at the world even if it was unjustly. He wasn’t pushing her to share, she didn’t really know why she was sharing to begin with. The more time she spent with him the more comfortable she was becoming. 

“When it rained all the kids on the street used to come out and jump around in the potholes,” she says, looking up and down the street. It was the only time she felt like a kid growing up, taking off their shoes and rolling up their pants as they splashed around. 

“You weren’t worried about getting hit?” he asks, as he examines the street as they cross, going towards the town. 

“No one can afford cars around here and those who could don’t come around here,” she replies, pointing towards the first shop. “That’s where I would pick up some sewing work, the paint is chipping on the window but that was the first painting Feyre did publicly. Mr Gregory saw her painting the walls of our house when he stopped by to drop off some work for me and commissioned her to paint for him. He couldn’t give much but he let her keep the extra paint,” she says as they move past it. 

She watches as he studies it for a moment, a ghost of a smile on his lips as he says, “She’s very talented.” 

“Yeah, she is. She tried to teach me but my cats always turned into blobs of paint, I eventually gave up,” Nesta retorts as she points to the next house. “That’s the bakery where Liz’s parents work, one year for her birthday we were invited over and we got to bake cookies. We were supposed to decorate them with icing but we all ate it while the cookies baked. Our faces and clothes were stained blue.” 

“That’s where I waitress,” she says pointing to the last building on the row. It was a dull grey building with barely any windows, the sign in the front was crooked. She felt more embarrassed showing him than she did her own home. 

“That’s where you met Tomas?” He asks, she watches as he examines the establishment. He was probably thinking the same thing that she was, why someone of his status and ego would be found frequenting a bar in caste seven that looked like that. 

She shrugs, looking away and back towards where they came from. It was getting late and they should probably start heading back. “Unfortunately,” she replies as they begin to make their way back to her house. She hoped everyone was gone by the time they got back. 

They walk in silence for a bit, she wonders if he thought she had anything to do with the rebel attacks. It had to be suspicious that she knew someone so involved without realizing it. She wraps her arms around herself in the night breeze sending a chill through her. 

“Here,” he says, unbuttoning his jacket and handing it to her. He seemed so assertive she didn’t want to say no and she’s grateful she didn’t as she slips her arms into the warmth. 

She smiles gratefully. “Not to make myself sound like a guilty party but I heard rumors about rebels recruiting around here, I never made the connection with Tomas until he showed up that night. I thought he was here for-,” she trails off but he gives her a confused look.  “For other business.” 

“What other business?” He eyes her confused, until realization dawns on him he looks away. “Oh, I get it.” he says, pulling at the collar of his shirt. She hadn’t seen him this fluster before, even when Liz tried to curtsey to him he hadn’t gotten this red. 

“I didn’t,” she replies, she felt like she had to say that in case he went back to the prince with this information but with this new revelation sent him into another wave of fluster. “We were never bad enough that I had to think about doing anything.” 

“I didn’t think- I wasn’t-,” he pauses trying to collect himself as they make their way up to her front door. “I wouldn’t have judged you if you had,” he finally says and she can see that he means it. There’s something behind his eyes that tells her there’s more to the story. 

She turns to open the door but pauses turning quickly to face him, “Thank you,” she says, swallowing as she realizes how close he was to her. Her cheeks burned and she blamed it on the brisk air. “Not just for the walk, but for listening to me.” 

He shrugs as if it wasn’t a big deal but it was to her. She never opened up like anyone but there was something about him that made her feel safe. Was this what she was missing? What she didn’t feel with Rhysand. Why she knew that Rhysand wasn’t meant for her. 

“I’ll always be here if you need someone to talk to, especially when we go back to the palace,” he says, pulling her out of thoughts. He was close enough to her that she could feel his breath against her skin. She wanted to turn away but she couldn’t, she felt drawn towards him as her eyes flicker from his stare to his lips. 

The door behind her opens and she falls backwards, he quickly grabs her elbow to steady her and she turns to see Elain standing in the door apologetically. “I am so sorry Nes, I didn’t realize you were back! I was just going to get some firewood,” Elain says, gesturing to the pile by the side of the house. 

“I’ll go grab it,” Cassian says as cool and collected as ever, maybe he wasn’t about to kiss her. Maybe he was just offering to listen whenever she needed to as a friend. Her cheeks burned from embarrassment. She was glad that Elain looked clueless as to what was about to happen. 

“I didn’t know when you would be back,” Elain says as she moves from the door to allow Nesta to step into the house. Nesta turns to see Rhysand sitting criss cross on the floor with Feyre sitting across from him with a smug smile. 

“Feyre has graciously been teaching me how to play a card game,” Rhysand announces as he stands up. Feyre stands up along with him and nudges him in the elbow as she says, “Saved by the bell, you were able to lose for the-,” she pretends to count on her fingers, “The sixth time?” 

He rolls his eyes and it was weird for Nesta to see him in this type of environment. It was like he was a normal teenage boy, no titles or crowns. She wonders how Feyre could be so confident with him. She never saw her open up to someone this quickly before. 

Cassian walks up behind her, holding a couple logs for the fire, she moves out of his way quickly. “My apologies, I’ll implement the game war into all of my counsel meetings now. I’ll be a pro in no time,” he retorts his voice dripping in sarcasm as he looks over at Nesta. His eyes fall downwards and she realizes that she’s still wearing Cassian’s coat as his eyes trail towards Cassian and how they were acting towards one another. 

“I want to marry whoever made these biscuits-,” A tall blonde with bright eyes and a red dress pauses mid-bite as she walks through the door leading to the kitchen. Nesta recognized it as the girl that made Cassian laugh at the first impressions.

She glances behind her as Cassian raises an eyebrow and smiles at the newcomer. “Mor? What are you doing here?” Cassian asks as he takes the few steps to embrace the girl. Nesta ignores how her cheeks burn and she hopes that no one notices her embarrassment. 

She slips off the coat, the cold air hitting her arms as she drops the coat on the chair. She moves past the Cassian and Mor muttering something about making tea. She wished she could just crawl under her covers and wake up from this nightmare she created. 

Chapter Sixteen: Cassian 

“Rhysand mentioned he was heading out of the palace for a few days and I had to come along,” Mor says to Cassian as she looks around the room. “Feyre and Elain have offered me the extra room while Rhysand bunks out here with you, isn’t life great?” 

Rhysand pipes up from where he was playing cards and says, “It’ll just be like old times,” he says smiling mischievously at Cassian but when Feyre makes a satisfied noise he looks down his mischievous smile quickly slipping into a frown. “I had good cars this time!” 

She smiles smugly, “Just not as good as mine,” she replies with a shrug turning to face them. “Anyone wanna join? I am starting to feel bad.” 

“I will!” Mor says, moving to sit on the floor. She looks back up at Cassian, “You joining?” He looks back towards the kitchen where he could hear Nesta moving around. He wanted to talk to her but Mor reached a hand out and pulled him towards the group. “Come on, one game, it’ll be fun for all of us to beat Rhysand.” 

Cassian sits down relentlessly, glancing up at the doorway ever so often to see if Nesta would appear. “Here,” Feyre says reaching forward and handing him a stack of cards. “I’ll teach a new game, hopefully Rhysand will be a little bit better at this one. It’s all about catching bluffs, as a prince you should be able tell right?” 

Cassian notices how Rhysand’s eyes linger for a moment as she continues to hand out the rest of the cards oblivious to his stare. Cassian raises an eyebrow as Rhysand glances towards him, he frowns looking back down to his cards as if he was a kid caught stealing from the cookie jar. 

Feyre begins to explain the rules as Nesta walks back into the room holding a book and a mug of tea, she sits down on the sofa next to Elain who was still attending to the fire. Cassian glances at the books she was opening and realized it was one of the ones he had dropped off for Nesta teaching about Prythian Folklore. 

He turns back as Feyre announces that they are ready to start and sees Mor staring at him quizzically. He wonders if this was how Rhysand just felt when Cassian had caught him in the act, he holds her gaze but she shakes her head and looks back at her cards. 

They continued playing cards but he wasn’t focused, his mind on what Mor knew or what she thought she knew and how Nesta was feeling after their possible kiss. He regretted it but only based on the fact that his foolishness could lead to Nesta being killed for treason. 

They finish a couple rounds before Mor announces she’s going to bed, Feyre and Elain follow suit, cleaning up the game and disappearing into their room. Nesta follows behind, heading into the kitchen, to clean up the baskets that were brought earlier.

He follows her while Rhysand heads into the washroom. “Are you alright?” he asks for his own selfish purposes, he wanted to know what she thought whatever happened out there was. He wanted to know if she felt it too, the connection between the two of them, the fact he knew even thinking about her the way he thought about her was against the rules of the selection. 

She shrugs, her back still facing him as she pulls the food out of the baskets and places it on the table. “I think the day is just getting to me, I feel a migraine coming on,” she replies and Cassian makes note that she didn’t mention him at all. Not that she should or that it would even be in her best interest to profess her love for him, was it love? Is he delusional? He shakes the thoughts, he was quickly spiralling out of control when they’ve only had a few serious conversations together. 

“Do you need help?” He asks, stepping forward, she shifts away from him as she feels his presence. He got his answer, she didn’t want anything to do with him, she probably never did. 

“No, I am alright,” her voice low and quiet as she moves the contacts of the basket to their respectful places in the pantry. “It’ll be good for me to have a moment to clear my head, I haven’t had time to fully comprehend everything that happened.” 

He wishes she was talking about what had happened with them but then he realizes how selfish that is when her family has just suffered a loss, although he was cruel towards Nesta it must be hard for him to think of him as being gone without a chance to say goodbye. “Okay, I’ll be out there if you need anything.” he nods towards the doorway and hopes that she’ll at least look at him. 

She doesn’t. So he turns on his heel and heads back out in the living room where Rhysand has already sprawled out on the couch. “Hope you don’t mind, I am a prince after all,” Rhysand mutters half asleep as he waves down to the floor where he put one blanket and a pillow. “At least I didn’t leave you with nothing.” 

Cassian doesn’t reply, just lays down on the floor staring up at the ceiling, his ears straining for every movement in the kitchen. 

~*~

“Wakey wakey eggs and bakey.” Cassian blinks up at the light while Mor crouches over him smiling as she pokes his shoulder, nudging him awake. “Rhysand had a full royal breakfast sent over, Feyre has practically eaten it all so if you want some you better get up now.” 

Cassian pushes himself into a sitting position and looks around the room. The sun was already beaming through the windows and he could hear people chatting in the kitchen. Feyre pops her head in, “Rhysand wants a tour of the town, you guys coming?” she asks as she pulls on a pair of muddy boots. 

“Do you really have to put those on now? You’ll track mud all over the place,” Nesta calls from where she was in the kitchen. Feyre rolls her eyes as she finishes tying the shoelaces and turns back towards the kitchen. He couldn’t help but analyze her tone, she didn’t seem angry or even upset, he wondered if that would change once he saw her awake. 

“Come on, get ready,” Mor replies, standing up and dusting off the jeans she was wearing. He raises an eyebrow at the sight, Mor loved her fancy dresses. “Stop looking at me like that, Elain let me borrow a pair. Now, get dressed. I am going to grab you some food.” 

He rolls his eyes and stands up as she moves towards the kitchen. He heads into the washroom to get ready and by the time he gets out Nesta and Rhysand are heading down the road, Feyre and Elain behind them, and Mor waiting by the porch with a sack of food. 

He takes it from her as she puts an arm through his. “So,” she announces as they begin down the road. He watches Nesta point out the buildings she had done yesterday with him to Rhysand. Feyre would chime in every once and a while and Rhysand would look back at her with a sparkle in his eye. “What’s going on with Nesta?” 

He pauses, looking over at Mor who was examining him, she wanted to see what his reaction was when she said that and he practically handed her his obvious feelings on a silver platter. “I am not sure what you mean,” he says, his face stoic as he looks ahead. “She’s a part of the selection, I get paid to protect them, what else do you need to know?” 

She chuckles shaking her head. “I am not an idiot, Cas. Anyone could tell that Elain caught you two in some kind of act,” she retorts. 

“We were not in some kind of act, I was walking her home because she didn’t want to be in her dead father’s house surrounded by people that didn’t care,” he replies, but he remembers the look Rhysand gave him as they walked in and saw that she was wearing his jacket. However, Cassian had seen his eyes linger a little too long on Feyre last night while playing cards. 

“Cassian, I’ve known you for a while now-,” she begins, and he can't help but roll his eyes. Just because they grew up together she thought she knew ever thought that went through his mind. She was right but he didn’t want her to know that. “And I can see right through of your lies. You should tell him.”

He looked up at Rhysand who had fallen back to walk next to Feyre, Nesta was still looking towards them and describing everything around them. He wondered if she didn’t care or if she didn’t see how much Rhysand had taken to Feyre. “Yes Mor, let me confess my non-existent feelings for a selected girl to my friend who is the one that technically owns her. So that we both die of treason.” 

“Rhysand wouldn’t turn you in,” Mor replies in an obvious tone. Rhysand wasn’t what Cassian was afraid of. They walk down the road and Cassian see’s a black car sitting in front of the house. As they get closer he hears Rhysand say, “I’ll have a visit arranged soon. Azriel, our grounds keeper would gladly show you around the grounds,” he finishes talking to Feyre and turns towards Elain. “He also takes care of the garden.” 

Elain smiles in thanks as Rhysand turns towards Nesta. “I’ll see you soon back at the palace?” he asks. 

Nesta pauses and Cassian finds himself holding his breath. He didn’t realize there would be a chance that she wouldn’t return. He finds her watching her every movement, letting out a sigh as she nods her head. “Once we finish moving I’ll be back,” she replies. 

He smiles before finally turning towards Mor and Cassian. “Are you staying?” he asks Mor. 

She turns towards Cassian before nodding at Rhysand. “I think I’ll stick around, this is much more entertaining than anything at the palace,” she pipes up. 

“Good, I’ll see you soon then. A word, Cassian,” Rhysand says and they walk around to the other side of the car. “I want you to stay as well. Help them move then escort Nesta back to the palace. I am not sure how the crowds will react to a selected girl moving alone.” 

Cassian glances over at Nesta who was watching them intently but turns away quick when she sees him looking. He sighs turning towards Rhysand, he probably didn’t want her anywhere near him. “I have a lot of work to do back at the palace, I’ll send my best guards,” he replies. 

Rhysand shakes his head, “This wasn’t a request, this was a demand,” he replies, and Cassian eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Rhysand was his boss technically but he had never ordered him to do anything. “I want you to be happy, Cas. You’re my best friend. You need to be here.” 

Cassian opens his mouth to ask what that meant but Rhysand steps into the car and slams the door behind him. The car quickly moves down the street and Cassian is left standing across from Nesta, the other girls already inside getting ready to pack. 

“You’re staying?” she asks. 

He looks down towards the road where his ride was already almost out of sight. “It looks that way,” he replies and because he can’t help but crack a joke he adds, “You’re stuck with devilishly handsome captain for a few more days.” Which earns him a small smile from Nesta.