#it's already messy enough as is i don't need my hobby to add to that

[beybuniki]

the todoroki piece will be up for tonight probably but i'll close my inprnt shop skdjns

long story short, I neither have the desire nor time to turn my art into a business/officially become a freelancer (yes it is that strict and i'm scared sorry sdjbcd,j) however small it might be. for some reason my platform has grown a lot and the more i try to offer to u guys, the more difficult it gets to separate personal/private and online and that is my nightmare, i want to keep my anonymity lmao, like this is just a silly hobby to me and i've been spending way too much time on my fanart endeavors when i have so many other things to do this year. I could go on and on but yeah, I'd like to go back to just posting art for free & do art trades/occasional kofi stuff SORRY

tysm for being so willing to financially support me, it genuinely makes me so happy to see so many people happily support artists <3

if you want my art on your walls you can print it yourself i don't think i'd mind that lol...

[thermometerjuice]

Unnecessary barbie collector rant

I would like to preface this with I know that this is messy and long and slightly unhinged but I am bored and feel like complaining. I would also like to say that I know everyone is free to do what they want with their own possessions and I know this comes off as mean but I don't care this is me being irrational and upset because I can be.

For many Barbie collectors, the made-to-move body is the most incredible thing in the world. So much so, that every doll in their collections must be systematically decapitated and given a new head. This is, in my opinion, one of the most annoying and pervasive issues in the collector community. Many people claim "It's for Photography" or "I just like to pose my dolls". Literally, shut the fuck up I hate that so much. I can understand re-bodying a damaged doll or only doing it to a couple dolls, but not every single doll needs to be able to touch its face. Like most of you, bitches are super shitty at photography anyways and I know for a fact there are only so many poses that you can make the doll do. Is it just me? Like I get it they're mass produced play things and it's not that serious but like also it is.

Do you remember tree change dolls and how everyone was pissed at that lady? That's the same way I feel about the people who make every doll made to move. Like first off, the made-to-move bodies that exist are all modern body sculpts so it is so weird when people re-body vintage and older dolls because like the clothes made for that body won't fit properly or at all anymore. Like I'm not even a die-hard preservationist when it comes to restyling and playing with dolls, in fact, I'm usually all for it but the head-swapping is just so ridiculous. Like the current fashion selections for modern body sculpts are objectively the worst in all of Barbie's history and the vintage fashions that do fit look terrible on the modern body. (Not to say that dolls have to be limited to whatever era they originated in but like generally, stylistically they tend to look a little better? like a '60s doll can look pretty goofy in a '90s outfit and vice versa but whatever i digress) (I also am not a big fan of what is now considered the "original" proportioned body in general and much prefer the bellybutton body. (Not that I don't like the other new body types, I do It's just that the current iteration of the standard body type is not my favorite since it does not lend itself well to backward compatibility and is generally poorly engineered.))

Furthermore, we all know the second-hand market has been becoming more and more of a nightmare for a multitude of reasons, one being that half of it is being taken up by the heads of dolls that were made to move on the unarticulated bodies that they were swapped with. This is already a hobby that encourages overconsumption, why are we also acting like turning two nice dolls into one slightly (subjectively) nicer doll and one slightly less nice (again subjective) but still perfectly fine doll that will rot in a bin for years is an acceptable thing to do. A pretty doll who realistically will spend the majority of its time with you on a shelf does not need to be fully articulated. People waste time, money, and plastic buying twice the amount of dolls they actually display/use and create one entire collection's worth of (Subjectively) bad dolls.

For the better part of the 65 years that Barbie has existed, most dolls never had anything more articulation than a twist waist, elbows, knees, hips, and shoulders, and guess what! That was good enough for everyone! Articulation does not automatically make a doll better. There are plenty of static dolls that are arguably better that way. I'd also argue that each doll's specific body adds charm to it that is stripped away when you homogenize a collection in this way. A major appeal of 80's/90's Barbie is the extreme proportion that makes her look like a cartoon character, and so many dolls of the 2000s and early 2010s have really cool gimmicks and special body molds that make them unique to collect. That is without even mentioning how many contemporary dolls lose their body diversity because there just aren't that many skin tone matches for every body type.

Thank you and shut up I hate you

[kopivie]

y'know, it's kinda funny that i asked myself why i write. over the years, people have asked me that a lot. i've had graded assignments ask me that question quite a bit. "why do you write? what is your motivation for writing?"

...my answers were always pretty bleak. "i write because i'm scared to talk to others." or: "i write because nobody will listen to me." and outside of those assignments, i've never genuinely asked myself why i write.

well.. warning for a big ol' dump here, i guess. this blog is basically a diary, so you know the drill.

the story always starts in the same place: in the back of the empty sanctuary of my childhood church with sunlight pouring in the stained glass windows, the colors pooling on the pages of my blue composition notebook. i was ten years old.

looking back on it now, i don't know why my story starts there. i think that's just the earliest time i can remember getting immersed in the act of writing. kind of like how people describe their earliest childhood memory as the day their consciousness fully developed. but that day was so colorful to me – more so than most days from my childhood. an old friend was plinking tv show tunes on the piano at the front of the sanctuary, a few older kids were chatting away in the frontmost pews, and i was standing at the back on the left side near the window, scribbling in my notebook about... magical girl anime. at the very least, i know why i was writing back then.

back then, i had a friend who was writing her own story. completely original with characters she was drawing as she went. the stories were written in screenplay format in her notebook with little doodles to give the stories some life and... i wanted to do that. i asked her to teach me how to draw – which she did with enthusiasm – but what intrigued me more was the writing aspect. i already had a habit of conjuring up vivid imagery in my head when reading, but the thought of being able to do that myself was amazing to me.

my ten year old brain lacked the creativity to create characters from scratch. naturally, i had to start with something i already loved – something i could easily reference and build up from there – so i started with sailor moon.

sailor moon, tokyo mew mew, pripara, pretty rhythm: aurora dream, precure... (all of which used to be uploaded to youtube with each episode fragmented into three parts, i might add.) ...that's where my writing journey begins. i used to write fanfiction in the same screenplay format. i filled several notebooks cover to cover with my big, messy handwriting. i wish i still had those notebooks. but the point is that i had no need for the artwork – my mind was enough.

i later developed a love for mythology – greek mythology, specifically. it expanded into astrology, anthology, and gemology... i would always weave these things into my works somehow. my love of linguistics would come into play as i'd learn languages and cultures just to use them for the sake of giving my writing more depth.

now that i'm looking back on all of this, i... don't think i ever had a purpose. when i began, i wanted to be like my friend. i wanted to show her that i could do it, too. later, i just wrote because i wanted to create characters in the animated worlds that i loved to lose myself in; it was a form of escapism, i think. it was definitely escapism from high school onward since my mental health worsened from 2017-2022, but before that.. there's nothing.

which is a little scary, y'know? realizing that i lack a purpose – that my writing lacks a purpose. the very hobby i decided to dedicate my future to feels meaningless now.

i wrote to replicate someone else. i wrote to escape my own thoughts; i wrote to comfort myself when i needed affection the most: i wrote to comfort and connect with others, but i also wrote to shield myself from my own reality.

i think the reason why this feeling of existential dread exists is because i'm finally in a place where i'm perceiving myself. for almost a decade now, i didn't want to be perceived by anybody, much less myself. i didn't think of myself as a person. i didn't exist. i was just some worthless lump of meat on this doomed earth who just so happened to know how to string words together. i was irreversibly flawed and unlovable.

i'm at a point where i now know what kind of person i am. i can look back on how broken i once was and be saddened by the pieces. i can finally pick up those pieces and put them together; i can set them aside and start anew using those pieces as a reference. what i'm saying is: i can see myself. i finally know what i look like. (i still don't understand how i look to others, but that's besides the point.)

but when my whole purpose for writing was to avoid that – to avoid seeing myself – what happens now? why do i write?

that's the reason why i haven't written about anything for a while now. i have nothing to hide from. i wither and rot for a few days at a time and then come out stronger, ready to brush it all away and move forward. i never did that before. before, i would wither and rot for months, and write to fill the void. i wrote recklessly and without abandon just to get my feelings out there in hopes that someone would hear my voice and know that i'm alive.

in essence, i saved my life through writing. literature saved my life. but now that i've taken the reins, i don't know what to do.

i refuse to leave it behind. i still have my creative spirit. i still have these passing ideas, these bursts of inspiration that characterized my teenage years. but the flames of passion die quickly without any kindling, leaving me lost. i feel hollow without writing but lighter without my agony weighing me down all the time.

...i'm lost. i don't know what to do. i'm more insecure in my writing than i have ever been in my entire life, and that scares me. i want to try, but there's this... block. a lack of emotion that i can't quite explain. there's more apprehension than there is inspiration, so my creativity shrivels up and dies, leaving me disgusted and horrified by myself. i don't know what to do.

i'm not going to give up.

i'm not. little by little, i will try to find my new meaning. i don't know what it will take for me to find it, but i will. maybe i'll just sit and do some research on my favorite topics when i get home? do some bullet journaling on my favorite things and dedicate time to making pages of my favorite facts. maybe something will blossom then.

[linddzz]

Hi! I saw the post about octopusseseses and I went down a rabbit hole of octopus-human interaction vids, and apparently some people have a pet one. Thoughts on hobbyist aquarium keepers with octos? It seems like a very difficult animal to care for properly at home, but an interesting one. There's a lot of conflicting info on if one can ethically keep one at all. Sadly, I have chronic "cute i want one" disease when I see any animal. But I can't keep houseplants alive, so I won't, don't worry lol

Small octopuses can be successfully kept as a pet, but they do require a specialized tank and specialized care, and the smaller species can have a lifespan of 1-2 years. Overall my opinion is that as a pet, the amount of specialized care and expense that goes into keeping an octopus is just...not worth it for their short lifespan. Also I do NOT think anyone should get an octopus unless they're experienced with keeping saltwater aquariums. Here's a quick list of things that need to be kept in mind for an octopus.

-Lifeapan: like I said, smaller species of octopus that you can find in the hobby have shorter lifespans. You'd pretty much be setting a whole system up to keep one animal for a relatively short time.

-Octo-Proofing: the escape stories of octopuses are only slightly exaggerated. Public aquariums keep their octos in tanks designed to hold an octopus. They can climb, they're strong, and they have no bones and too much curiosity. An octopus tank will need a lid that is latched down, plus every single filter intake and return and overflow and ANYTHING will need mesh attached and attached in a way that the octopus can't just figure out how to rip it off. You will then have to clean that mesh frequently to make sure it doesn't get clogged up and mess your whole tank up

-Filtration: octopuses are messy. They have mucus that comes off them, they toss bones and shells from their food all over the tank and eat daily. They're sensitive to high nitrates and their hemocyanin blood makes them sensitive to shifts in pH. You'll want a good protein skimmer at least and I'd recommend a system with a sump that'll allow good gas exchange while still being able to keep the top of the tank closed up against octopus escapes. You'll want to do weekly water changes and for smaller systems it's better to just set up an automatic top-off to keep the salinity stable.

-Tankmates: you won't have any tank mates that last long except maybe some tiny asterina starfish and corals.

-Bastard Factor: ok so I don't know if it's common in the hobby but it is not unheard of for some smaller octo species with lidded tanks to figure out that if they can push the lid up just enough to spray water out of the tank then the lid will open up and other such bastard animal shenanigans that sound charming and fun to read but are way less charming to actually deal with.

-Food: so this isn't impossible but they do need a variety of prey items that are sometimes more expensive. Octos are opportunistic hunters but most of their prey consists of invertebrates and you'll want to offer a good mix through the week for the best nutrition. This can include whole small clams/mussels, small crabs, krill, squid chunks, shrimp, and occasional fish like silversides.

-Enrichment: these are smart animals, which is the appeal! But even when you're not interacting with them the octopus is going to need things to interact with. This can be puzzle feeders, toys to take apart, plastic jars, frozen whole small clams/crabs, octopus popsicles made of frozen saltwater with food inside (which will also make a mess of your water as it melts!) and then you need to change up the items offered or add multiple items through the day.

So overall I would say it's possible to keep an octopus ethically as a pet if you're already an experienced aquarium hobbyist who is able to do a specialized system and the extra routine of enrichment. But the money, time, effort, money, and MONEY involved just makes them not really worth it as a pet. And each one has a different personality, so there is no guarantee that you'll have an octopus that has any interest in human interaction.

[bemylord]

ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇᴍᴏʀɪᴢᴇ ᴊᴜᴊᴜᴛꜱᴜ ᴋᴀɪꜱᴇɴ ʙᴏɪᴢ

[it's only my opinion you may add yours in the comments for the newbies <3] might be spoilers. + a lot of my stupid jokes don't like it, don't read it.

his name satoru gojo but you can call him mr. satoru steal your girlfriend gojo.

fluffy cat.

but can kill you within a sec if you touch his students.

he wears a mask so girls don't lose their panties.

has a sweet tooth.

first impression - a thirty-year-old clown. second - why the devil is he such an idiot, when the strongest shaman?

he coudn't say no to his students.

makes jokes even during battle.

he gets along with children because he is a child himself.

can defeat the king of curses but he's interested what will be next.

a young man who has lost his mind.

nanami kento aka food lover

the best father ever. the best husbando ever. the best ever.

do not irritate him.

loves bread/fooodie so you better learn how to cook.

his back hurts [guess why]

dude in style even on the beach.

fetish/kink for ties and harness [try to convince me otherwise]

wanted to live like other people, but gojo satoru appeared on the horizon and his life went down the drain.

active at night. [no smut lol he just an owl]

a fan of reading newspapers in the 21st century when there is a phone.

itadori yuuji aka vessel for curse.

the reason why this whole mess has started.

sweetie pie, jesus fuc1ing sweetie. stupid but cute.

makes friends easily.

a finger-eater.

wanted to be normal person, but ate the finger and died.

jennifer lopez fan because of her as- singing. ;)

very caring toward others.

gojo and he are idiots in the company.

he's a fan of summoning all kinds of spirits at school.

the funniest, sweetest person you've ever met.

he probably dyed his head pink for a bet.

megumi fushiguro aka dog summoner <3

try to touch him and the king kills you.

all the bullies are afraid of him.

he loves dogs.

dogs love him.

and it's idyllic.

make him angry and this nice boy will show you instant murder [if the king doesn't kill you first].

went insane 'cause of satoru [megumi has known him since he was a little boy]

but he's actually kind of shy if you hug him unexpectedly.

i don't know why the f^ck he's so important to the king, but don't confront him.

he has messy hair that you want to ruffle.

sukuna ryomen aka the king. THE king. the KING.

yuuji is daytime mode and sukuna is nighttime mode.

he got tattoos, even though his mother forbade it. [that's my dumb joke]

i don't doubt if he has a pierced tongue/ears/nose. smth more

he sits on the throne because he gets a thrill out of it.

spends 24/7 in his world and who knows what he does there.

can create mouths all over his body than could compete with satoru.

he had four arms, two faces and two d in the past. doesn't understand why age can be an obstacle in a relationship.

if he likes you somehow, he will do anything for you.

how will he like you? good question.

he likes to tear the clothes off and walk around naked in the streets because he has six pack.

toji fushiguro [zenin] aka dilf/big D energy.

irresponsible dad.

the kind of dad that everyone wants.

the shaman killer, but everyone still loves him.

he'd smoke cigarettes even in his sleep. i'm sure he would have a very low voice.

you'll do e v e r y t h i n g he tells you to do.

in general, one look is enough - and you already do as he says.

he forgot his son because he didn't keep track.

he wears baggy pants because he's got a d...

got a scar on his lips [can't deny it looks hot] because of his fucked-up family.

became insane because of his family.

his hobbies are gambling, and he also doesn't get drunk - perfect for something.

nobara kugisaki aka the girl who is holding a hammer in her bag

cute girl at first sight.

the only girl in the company of yuji and megumi.

taking the last two with her on shopping trips as slaves to carry her bags.

by the way, they pay for her clothes.

don't argue with her, because nobara will change anyone's mind.

but inside, she's a warrior girl.

she carries a hammer in her bag, so don't you dare lift her skirt.

like nanami, she's always on style.

needs a psychiatrist for she is clearly ready to kill any curse in a radius of 50 km if the curse interferes with her shopping.

maki zenin aka she hits you from the turntable without the damned energy.

without her glasses she can't tell a person from a garbage bag.

she will hit you without using the cursed energy.

doesn't deserve to be hated by her family.

wants to be strong and independent.

she has a panda friend.

wants nothing more than to take care of her loved ones.

you have two choices: fear her or love her <3

aoi todo aka takada's most loyal fan

a devoted bts and k-pop fan.

knows all the songs of blackpink.

fanboy to the marrow.

the same dude who idealizes/imagines his ideal world before going to sleep.

if you mention takada chan in a conversation there's no stopping him.

best friend, in fact.

for yuji and takada chan will kill anyone

if you want to be friends with him, you have to know his dream ideal.

don't be afraid to add information about them/add more characters.

[i know todo doesn't know bts and k-pop it's just a joke and a lot of my humor, just so you understand what they are]

kudos and reblogs are welcome <3

[catzula]

a/n: I just love Suna so much *screams*

honorable mentions: crackfic-like? The handsome-stranger-you-meet-at-the-airport au, swearing, 1.2k

It's a night flight.

Suna always preferred night flights, anyway.

Suna doesn't like flying. Sitting in a cramped seat for hours can't be anyone's favorite hobby, but he hates flying with a passion. For starters- it's unhygienic. The air has a strange smell to itself, as well, and it never fails to give him goosebumps and an urge to stop inhaling altogether.

He hates the tasteless coffee they serve, and the little packets of nuts remind him of the day he had discovered his nut allergy in a flight like this. The leather seats making him feel sticky with sweat, but the air conditioning brings him on the brink of hypothermia.

If there was an injection of sorts he could take that would put him in a coma during the flight, Suna wouldn't think twice before taking it, and based on all this, it's fair to say he can get a little cranky in airports.

As someone with not too much energy to spare, airports are exhausting for him. He already doesn't like running, but Kita is a little too punctual to let him rest or buy a coffee from Starbucks. The twins' fighting about something new every other minute never already driving him mad, but being surrounded by overly stressed people doesn't help, either.

"I will jump out of the window if I have to sit next to Atsumu on the flight." Suna had told the captain months before, the exact moment he had heard he would have to fly with the team.

That was the very reason the middle blockers seat was all the way in the back, located next to the window and a stranger. Suna can't be happier- all he wants is some peace and quiet, anyway, to wear his sleep mask and headphones and cut ties with reality as much as he can.

"You good there?" Suna barely hears Atsumu's irritating voice through his headphones, lips curling in annoyedly as he turns to the boy to send a glare- but to his surprise, the fake blond isn't looking at Suna.

"Oh, I- ah fuck- yeah!" He hears a voice, and it takes him a second to notice you who stands before the seats, arms reaching up for the overhead cabins and successfully blocking Suna from his seat. You must be the stranger he'll have to spend the next eight hours with, he supposes.

The tired gaze looks you up and down, you who is fighting a bag half your size- shouldn't that be under the plane?- and trying to push it into the overhead cabins. It's apparent you're struggling, arms shaking with the heaviness of the bag, biting your lip to muffle the sounds of your wrestling.

Despite your words, anyone who has eyes could tell you are, in fact, not fine.

In desperate need of a pair of longer arms, you peek at the tall brunette standing next to you; he's huge, broad shoulders and a height that makes you wonder if he hit his head on the way here. He looks familiar- if you weren't in as much of a pinch- you might've let out an audible gasp when you realized why he looked so familiar.

He's the stranger you'd seen earlier that day, standing in the line across of you, looking tired and black-painted nails scrolling down his phone. The all-black fit he has only adds to the mysterious aura surrounding him, arms slumped forward nonchalantly. You remember thinking if you'd ever see him or anyone as handsome ever again, making scenarios in your mind as to what kind of a man he is. You never thought you'd ever meet him again, though.

Suna notices the silent cry of help you have in your eyes, even when you avert your gaze away from him and mask your desperation- but he's no fool, he can tell when someone lookshim with an open need of help.

Well.

Suna admits he's no saint, either.

He can help you out, and you both can sit your seats, but he doesn't really care, nor has the energy to help you. All he wants to do is to sit down already -even though it would suffice if he just pushed the bag with his fingertips, but Atsumu beside you smiling at you does look a little more eager to help than he does, anyway. There you go, a prince charming ready to help.

Suna seems unfazed by the glare you send his way -any scenario you've created falling in disappointment, too, really? He wouldn't even offer to help?- as he bends in half to slip through the triangle-shaped gap you've created with your arms, slipping underneath them to get to his seat and-

A shriek outs your lips as you watch the bright blue bag slide from your fingertips, it's almost like slow motion, watching the object fall right on top of the boys' head.

"Ah! What the-" Suna groans in pain right after hearing a loud thump caused by the crash of the luggage and his skull. "What the fuck?"

Fox-like eyes are quick to find you, going between your panic-stricken and slightly amused face and the bag resting before your feet. "I-I'm so sorry!" You exclaim, but your strained voice sounds more like you're holding back a laugh instead of guilty.

Well. Karma is a bitch.

"Here, let me help." Atsumu offers maybe a little too late as he lifts your bag off the ground -Atsumu hopes he managed to hide how much he struggled, too. Honestly? What do you have in there?- and places it in the cupboard. "Thank you." You at least have the decency to look grateful at the blonde, giving him a pretty smile. "I'm so sorry," you repeat, turning your focus back to the brunette, who is rubbing his head in pain. "It just slipped out of my hand!"

To your dismay, Suna doesn't even spare you a glance as he mutters a "Whatever." Frowning and finally plopping himself down on his seat.

You narrow your eyes but stay silent as you do the same, too, settling in the seat, accidentally elbowing him one too many times as you try to get your damn jacket off.

You can feel his dissatisfied glare as the flight attendant brings the man sitting beside you a packet of ice, and you ignore the "tch!" sound he makes as he places the ice on the crown of his head.

"Bye, Suna!" The blonde you've seen earlier waves a goodbye at the stranger sitting next to you- Suna, you think, a pretty name for a man as cross as him.

"Are you okay?" You mutter under your breath, raising your gaze to take a better look at him. His face contorted in pain- he's the type of handsome you only get to meet in an airport. It's unfair how good-looking the man is, his shapely lip rolled between his teeth, deep-brown locks tousled and messy, and he has the prettiest eyes you've ever seen in your life.

Suna doesn't answer your question, but he makes it clear he's heard you with a scoff, eyes rolling in annoyance, averting his gaze to his phone. It makes you feel angry- being ignored as if you're a six-year-old kid.

"I'm not sorry, actually. You had it coming." You huff pettily, lips pursing when he keeps his silence.

"Okay, I'm a little sorry." You mutter after a few awkwardly silent seconds, suddenly feeling guilty. You did drop a heavy ass bag on his head, after all. "But not much."

You turn your eyes away from him when he sighs, annoyance evident in the sound. "And?" He hums, voice monotone and deep. "Which answer I give will make you stop talking to me?"

Suna knows that was unnecessary as hurt and embarrassment flash across your face- he notices that's the first time he even looked at you that night. Well, he can get unreasonable at airports, he agrees.

"That was rude." Suna comments after a few awkward seconds.

"It was." You agree. "But I was rude, as well."

"You kind of were."

To his answer, you can't hold back a lighthearted chuckle, the oddness of the situation dawning on the both of you. "This might be in the top 10 strangest ways I met someone." You chuckle, he does, too, but with a sarcastic quirk of his brow.

He has a pretty smile, plump lips curving just enough to show you a glimpse of his white teeth, enhancing the sharp features of his face. "Only top ten? That's a shame."

You don't speak as Suna closes the sleeping mask over his eyes -it has a cat print on it too, how cute- as a smile still lingers on his lips. "Good thing I have eight hours to at least make it into top five."

[cheeseburgerbuan]

wanted to make a little blog post documenting some real life going ons and things i've been playing/watching! :o

Truthfully not much going on IRL for me as it is too cold to do anything 🥴 I keep saying the moment it gets hot here I'll be up early and take advantage of good weather like I'm not going to run back inside to an AC-chilled room the moment I start sweating too much LOL Also took a brief hiatus from the gym just to focus on some life/hobby stuff after work, still been going good with my dieting so it's not a big issue. So besides that, really not much going on. Been slacking on making art lately but trying to work on something atm. In regards to stuff I've been indulging in lately: Games:

FFXIV: 6.1 dropped so I've been having fun with the game again after a brief break. I've been enjoying the PVP revamp to an extent, sadly not enough to grind for the Garo mounts sorry LOL Sailers also did some Endsinger EX and that was a lot of fun! Current goal is to get a clear from that and go back to leveling crafters.

NEO: The World Ends With You: I started this one about... a month ago now, I wanna say? I've absolutely been loving everything about this game so far and am always listening to the OST on my way to work everyday LOL Probably about more than halfway done with the game and if postgame stuff isn't too annoying to go through maybe I'll do it right after... or just save it for an NG+ run in the future. But I'm having a blast for sure right now.

Twisted Wonderland: I'm only mentioning this because lately I fall off of gachas really quickly. The moment leveling units starts to feel like work the uninstall is inevitable. However, since the game is really more a card collector visual novel where stats don't matter, I don't feel nearly as stressed to do shit. It's nice. My plans after NTWEWY are to either pick up Kirby or start DQXI which has been on the backburner for a while but it'll most likely be Kirby. I need a bit of a JRPG break after this lol Shows/Channels I've been watching:

The Ultimatum: What can I fucking say about this honestly?? You are not immune to watching straight people be messy as shit on one of these trash tv shows. I fucking love it.

Rilakkuma and Kaoru: Already seen this one when it came out, but gave it a light re-watch as background noise while doing some drawing last night. I'm still mad they'll never make more of this, it still warms my heart as much as the first time I watched it.

I Will Always Travel For Food: If you are familiar with TabiEats (foodie vlog channel run by two Japanese dudes named Shinichi and Satoshi), you'll also probably know this one? It's a side channel run by Shinichi where he doesn't talk and just quietly shows stuff and adds commentary through subtitles. I watch his other two channels where he tends to talk (not that I have an issue with that LMAO) it's just that I tend to prefer the ASMR on it and reading the subs. If you like Japanese food and restaurants (and are also possibly trying to fill the niche of not being able to go to Japan rn), I recommend this! The Ultimatum is giving me a 90 day Fiance itch again so that feels like something that I'll be watching sometime soon LOL And that's pretty much what I've been into as of late 😤

[baronessblixen]

Let’s Bee Together

This is for the awesome @realmofextremepossibility , destroyer of straws and my intercontinental everything 😘 

Once upon a time she asked me to write this story for her: Set during IWTB: Scully comes home from the hospital to find a bored and restless Mulder has picked up an interesting new hobby: apiculture. 

It took me this long to come through, but tada! Here we go. Tagging @today-in-fic

The sun is low as Scully steers the car towards the house. She parks, not caring how bad of a job she's doing. They've got enough space out here in rural Virginia. The warm breeze tickles her skin and she takes a deep breath. Home. Her steps are heavy as she walks up the porch. There's no sight of Mulder. She steps inside and is surprised how cool it is and how dark. Scully switches on a light, hangs up her coat and looks for Mulder in his office. The room is just as dark, abandoned and messy. That makes her smile. But he's not there either.

"Mulder?" She's shocked how brittle her voice sounds. She rubs her hand over her eyes, exhaustion at her fingertips. She switches into her comfortable sneakers and puts on Mulder's old sweater that he's thrown over a chair. It smells like him. The air is turning colder and licks at her skin as she walks outside. When she hears a buzzing sound, she's convinced she's going insane. Until, finally, she finds Mulder. If that man is indeed the man she's spent the last 15 years with.

"Mulder?" She doesn't dare walk closer to him. He's wearing… something. And he's surrounded by… bees. Lots and lots of bees. She rubs her eyes again, not certain she is here, is awake and not dreaming. But Mulder is still there, as are the bees, as is the buzzing. "Mulder!" she yells, needing him to explain what the hell is going on.

"Scully, hi." Even through the veil, she can see him grin. She'd never thought she'd see him like this. Mulder is in full gear. Veiled hat, full protective suit and boots. He's a vision in white and she'd laugh if she wasn't completely frozen. Not to mention confused. How long has she not been home?

"Surprise," he says, lifting his arms. His polyester rustles as he walks closer to her. He smells like plastic, the warm sun and honey. Scully can't do anything but stare at him. She can't even find her voice to ask him what all of this is about. "We have bees."

"I can see that," she says with a hard swallow. The bees seem content over there at their hive, buzzing happily around, not coming closer. But bees make her nervous, even after all these years. Her skin is itching under her clothes and she wants to go away, back inside, and never see these bees ever again. "Why do we have bees, Mulder?"

He shrugs, his smile spreading over his whole face. If she's honest, she hasn't seen him smile like this in a while. A long while. After the Monica Bannan case and Mulder's reinstatement as a non-dead and non-fugitive person, he's become restless. Scully thought he'd be happy to be able to go out again, like a normal person. Except Mulder has never been normal. Isolation has changed him. The first time she asked him to accompany him to a hospital function, he hesitated. Told her to go on her own and have fun. As if she couldn't have fun with him. She's waited years to be with Mulder out in the open. She dragged him with her, pleading with him, and he went. It wasn't a full-blown disaster, but close to it. After that, it was hard to get Mulder out of the house at all.

Now she realizes that his pale complexion has taken on color. His cheeks are rosy, healthy. His eyes are sparkling again.

"I was bored," he admits with a boyish smile. "You kept saying I needed a hobby. You were right. My novel is going nowhere and I wanted to do something."

"But… bees? Why didn't you tell me about them?" That's when his expression gets sheepish. He's been planning a surprise; she recognizes the signs.  

"I thought I'd wait until I could present you our first homegrown honey. I had this whole thing planned." With a cheesy line about her and honey, no doubt. She smiles at him, feels guilty that she's ruined it now. She eyes the hive, the bees around it. "They're harmless," Mulder says, sensing her discomfort.

"They're bees, Mulder. Bees sting. You can talk all you want in your protective gear."

"I might have bought a suit for you, too. It was supposed to be part of the surprise. Do you want me to get it?" She shakes her head no and if Mulder is disappointed, he hides it well. He takes off his hat.

"You really know what you're doing there?" From her standpoint, it looks like he's got everything he needs. It looks, and she barely dares to think it, professional.

Mulder nods, stepping closer to her. "I've been reading a lot. I didn't want to go into it and not be prepared."

"How is it that you have no stings?" Has she just not seen them? When was the last time they've made love? The last time she's touched, let alone seen, his naked body? She gets home late at night, with Mulder already asleep. In the morning, when she leaves, he's still in bed. She's been missing everything. There's a beehive behind her house and she had no idea.

He shrugs. "I'm good at this, Scully."

"You're good at everything you put your mind to." She means it, too. Shortly after they went on the run, Mulder decided he needed to learn how to cook. It was the easiest, safest way for them to eat. And learn to cook he did. Every once in a while he still cooks for her and it's never been anything but excellent. She never would have thought he'd be interested in beekeeping, though. After all this time, she's still learning new things about him.

"You know," his whole face lights up in a smile, "there's a book called Bee Sex Essentials. That one really held my interest."

"Does everything come back to sex, Mulder?"

"Well, doesn't it? Anyway, it was the first book I read."

"Of course it was," she chuckles and Mulder continues.

"The title spoke to me but ever since then, I've been so fascinated by bees. Scully, these little insects are amazing." She takes his hand and smiles at him, hoping he'll keep going. How she's missed seeing him like this. His enthusiasm has always been contagious. He loves this. She sees it in the way the corners of his mouth twitch.

"I've been thinking about joining a beekeeping club."

"There are clubs?" He nods, a quick, excited movement.

"There's one not far from here. I'll show you later. They've got a website and everything. If you want," he adds, like an afterthought.

"I want," Scully assures him. "I feel like… Mulder, when did all this happen? When did you do all this?" His smile wavers, a shadow flickering over his face. She understands. She hasn't been home much lately. It's not just that they haven't made love. When was the last time they spent an evening together, doing nothing? When was the last time they talked, really talked? She can't remember and it's not Mulder's fault. Her whole life is at the hospital.  

"I'm sorry," she says before he even gets a chance to explain. The simple words chip away at her and she feels a deep longing to hug him, to keep him close and not let go.

"I'm happy you love your work so much, Scully. I am. Seeing you as a doctor, doing something you love, it's… it's breathtaking. I just needed to find something for myself that made me feel the same way."

"And then you found the bees."

He chuckles. "I found the bees. It's a hobby, Scully. This is not my calling. It's a way to spend my time and do something so I don't… you know." She nods. So that he doesn't become restless or worse, fall into the cold abyss of depression. She shudders, thinking about it. Mulder draws her closer, shielding her from the cool air and her own thoughts.

"But how did you- where did all of this come from?" The fact that there are approximately hundreds of bees living in the backyard now makes her uneasy. She wants Mulder to be happy and she wants him to have this. But… does it have to be bees?

"I bought them. Well, I bought a nuc," he laughs when he sees her confused expression, "it's just terminology. And of course, I bought a queen." The pride in his voice is evident.

"You have a queen?"

"You need a queen, Scully. I have two, actually." He kisses her nose softly.

"The queens tolerate each other?"

"We'll see." He winks at her and takes her hand. Now she understands. She lets him lead her over to the small wooden hive. The buzzing gets louder the closer they get.

"Mulder, I'm not sure-" he puts a finger on her lips and then puts the hat he had on earlier over her head. It's too big for her but it will work for the moment.

"Aren't they just beautiful?" Squeezing Mulder's hand tight, she watches. Her fear vanishes with every second. The bees won't attack her. They're working. They're busy little bees, doing their job. A smile breaks across her face, the sheer joy of watching this little world overwhelming her. Mulder's eyes are on her face, warming her. He, too, is smiling.

"So what does my queen bee think of my… honey queen?"

"We both think you should come up with better lines." But she grins at him.

"Come on, let's go inside."

"Why?"

"It's getting cold and the bees don't need us here. I, however, would like to kiss you and we don't have the best track record when it comes to kissing around bees." He tugs at her hand and she follows him but stops him once they're far enough from the hive. The buzzing is a distant hum, like music.

"I missed you," she says, interlacing their fingers.

"I missed you, too." She feels like he wants to say more but doesn't. Maybe tonight isn't the time to have a serious conversation. Tonight is about sweetness, like honey, about starting to find a way back.

"This residency is… it's a lot." He nods, understanding. In all of this, in everything they've done since they went on the run all those years ago, Mulder has been nothing but understanding. Now it's her time. If Mulder wants to keep bees, then he will keep bees. Standing here with him, she realizes it's not him who is restless, it's her. She's been trying to sprint towards more, towards other things. Mulder is just here, trying to make a life. As unremarkable as it may seem. Ages ago she asked him if he ever wanted to stop, to have a normal life when their lives were anything but. Now, he's making a new life; he has settled down, with her. Bees and all.

"Can I kiss you now?" he asks with a hint of the impatience she knows so well. Hell, she even missed that part of him. She misses all of him. But she doesn't answer him and she doesn't let him kiss her. Scully gets on tiptoes and presses her mouth to his. There's a hum that gets closer and she breaks their kiss just as Mulder's mouth opens under hers. He mewls and looks disappointed.

"I think… Mulder, I think maybe one of the bees followed us." As if it were 1998 and not 2008, his hand sneaks to her neck, wanders along and under her collar. She shivers, goosebumps exploding on her skin from his simple touch.

"No bee this time." His smile is as gentle as the hand clasping her neck. He leans forward again and right before their lips meet, Scully moves away. "Scully," he whines. "I told you we should go inside. I'm not letting another bee stop me from making love to you."

They giggle all the way upstairs to their bedroom. They close the door behind them and find each other.

With no bee in sight.