#it's 2:21am rn

[jumpthensfall]

i've been mia but i'm here to say happy international lesbian day

[exopelagic]

WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME BURROWS END WASNT FREE

[memberment]

Morning Glory

GOOODMORNINIG IT IS 3PM I JUST WOKE UP I AM LOCKING IN AND FUCKING FINISHING THIS ARC

5:23 update: I am 41.9k deep. The arc is on it's way to being done. So hype.

6:36 update: I got distracted on the goddamn clock app for an hour but it's FINISHEDDDDD. THEY'RE BROKEN UP!!!!!!! I'M SUH HAPPY<3 I LOVE IT HERE

7:52 update: I AM 43K WORDS IN AND THE BOYS GROUP MESSAGE HAS OFFICIALLY BEEN MADE

YESSSSSSS

2:21am update: I just locked in after ignoring my doc for a few hours and am soooooo happy with what I'm writing rn LMAO 46.6k deep. I fear this beast of a fic may well surpass Dandelion in word count.

4:18am update: I am currently foaming at the mouth because I just realized based on post schedule WE WILL LITERALLY BE IN ANGST HELL UNTIL DECEMBER ONCE THE ANGST STARTS IN DANDELION LIKE WHAT THE FUCK!!! I actually hate it here. Someone take my computer away.

[the-lokal-homo]

Waiting for my brother to pick me up from school, bc they canceled 4 hour of class, which means school is over at 11:15am instead of 2:45pm. The next possible bus for me would be around 1:15pm. Also: the teacher let us out 10 minutes early so some students can get there bus.

It's 11:20 now and my brother is still not here. Kinda scared that he forgot to pick me up and is asleep rn.

It's 11:21am I hear his car. (Not actually his car but my oldest brothers car, but he has a new one)

It's 11:42am rn we are home, I'm in my room and very thankful that he did NOT forgot me

[thelastof17]

Wed, May 6, 2023 (2:21am)

i turn 18 in 25 days. i know it probably won’t feel very different on the day but i’m still scared. i want to be 17 forever. it’s the perfect age. my parents are still in their 40s, my brother is in middle school, my sisters in college but still living at home, luna is only two years old, we just adopted coco. i feel like i might lose my mind. i know i sound dramatic but i’ve been having an existential crisis for the last 4 years, and aging has only made it worse (yes i know im only 17) so i kind of a reason to freak out. anyway i just wanted to write abt some of the things that have happened this year because my memory is terrible and i want to remember everything... or at least the things that matter. the things that might not matter a decade from now but at least for rn, make me happy. and i’ll take that anywhere i can get it. it’s been the hardest year of my life. i’m actually writing this as im healing from my wisdom teeth extraction. i got all four  removed on wed and its sat. they were impacted too so i had to get stitches. its been a weird recovery. i finished the umbrella academy and it made me feel even more aware of my existence and mortality. i feel funny. i can’t walk or breathe without feeling how incredibly weird it is that i’m alive and i can... idk do things? have free will? i can move if i choose to, or walk, or speak, or see, or smell, every action feels big and i feel small. how does that work?

[healthybones18]

been working on a commission for someone close and i realized (again) how much i love the art process and just having fun with it.. im coloring it in rn,, been listening to healing detox music on youtube (?) in the dark as i work on it for the past 2 hours, it’s 3:21am, it’s quiet, im the only one awake, just all feels very therapeutic

[cannibaldatingsite]

what is Happening with destiel & twitter & stan girlies rn... i do not want to log into twitter ever again

oh man uh i dont really know how much you need explained here but basically chad lindberg and samantha ferris who played ash and ellen on the show have been like, roleplaying running the roadhouse on twitter and in the days leading up to valentines day they were doing this whole thing about how there was gonna be a huge party and they mentioned weddings and a trenchcoat and chad engaged with some hellers in replies so everyone started planning the wedding and stuff yeah anyway valentines day arrives and chad+samantha kind of just completely ignore the whole wedding thing which is fine whatever the fans were the ones actually making this an event but then TODAY they both went off about how there was no destiel wedding, there had never been a destiel wedding planned, them doing a destiel wedding would go “against the integrity of the show”, @’ing them about this was bullying etc basically the spn media experience

[welove-thedirection]

does anyone else find themselves awake at 2am and wonder what anthony & sebastian’s text convos look like?

[mrskodzuken]

[asteraegis]

some more evie and kassandra junk

[nymphaticc]

Me: *actually gets ready to sleep early for the first time - spends hours checking every social media until it's 3 am again*

[mar-zz]

A friend @ 2am on a Saturday morning: hey you awake? wud? :)

Me, deadass foaming at the mouth, drinking Margarita's and getting jojis fucking face tattooed on my entire back: ù ʰh Hm,, , nö?

[ateez-amanda]

Girl Talk

Time: September 8th 2020

Summary: amanda fills in some of her closest friends w/ the latest in her love life while at show champion

Featuring: dreamcatcher’s jiu and sua

a/n: let's say atz and dreamcatcher are good friends thanks to amanda for this scenario. like always, pls let me know what you think

masterlist

taglist: @skzfairies, @3nhyp3nn [send an ask if you want to be on/off the taglist :)]

“Alright, you're all done, Amanda.” 

Feeling soft bristles from the eyeshadow brush lift off her eyes as she flutters her eyes open. Entranced by her new appearance through the mirror, she smiles at ateez’s makeup artist, “Like always, your work is perfecto.”

“It’s because I have a gorgeous model.” Their makeup artist playfully butter up to her.

“Oh, stop.” Amanda went along with it, acting coy and shyly waving her hand.

“Alright. Alright. That’s enough.” The maknae butted in with a repulsive expression.

She grinned, “You're just jealous.” 

Jongho scoffs, “Please. I get just as many compliments about my appearance as you do. Now if you are done, can you get up? It’s my turn now.” He teasingly shooed her away with his hands.

“Fine.” She giggled as she raised from the chair and headed for the couch in the waiting room. 

Finally getting a break, she used this chance to check her messages she hadn’t been able to check since this morning. Normally her phone was the first thing she checked in the morning but she overslept for the first time in her life which had been giving her an ominous feeling since.

The thought quickly left her mind after seeing some text messages she received from the person she had been secretly hoping for. An amused smile spread on her lips as she read through the spams of messages.

[2:34am] Hannie😇: good morning, beautiful😘 

[2:34am] Hannie😇: ik you are asleep rn but dk showed me a cute video of a panda accidentally hitting itself with a stick

[2:35am] Hannie😇: and now i miss u even more😔

[2:36am] Hannie😇: also good luck on your stage today. I know you blow everyone away😁

[2:36am] Hannie😇: and make sure you eat properly 

Wait a minute. Was I just compared to a clumsy panda?

[8:21am] Rara💕: good morning hannie☺️

[8:21am] Rara💕: did u just compare me to a clumsy panda?🧐🧐

[8:22am] Rara💕: i feel like i should be offended but i have decided to spare you for today since you sent such lovely messages after it

[8:22am] Rara💕: aren’t i sweetest🥰

[8:23am] Rara💕: thank you for the luck and i ate a yummy bagel this morning🫡

[8:23am] Rara💕: make sure you also take care of yourself

[8:24am] Rara💕: and i miss you too

As she typed out the last message, she realized how much she actually meant it. It had been a couple of weeks since their last date with her busy with promotion on ateez’s comeback and him preparing for Seventeen’s next comeback, which he had very been remaining tiplipped to avoid spoiling. 

Though the two have been constantly contacting each other through phone to remain in touch, there was still a little part of her that missed having his physical presence around, which is unusual for someone who likes being alone and is nonstop surrounded by people all day.

She missed the way his eyes lit up and the gummy smile appears when he rambles about the things he loves, and his distinct breathy laugh as he throws his head back at some stupid joke she says. The little touches between them that make her heart feel like it's going to shoot out of her chest. 

She let out a longingly sigh. Maybe it is time to take the next step. As she leans back on the couch she thinks back to when Jeonghan and her first reciprocated their feelings.

“Aera, I don’t want to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. We don’t have to start a relationship right away. We can take things slow. This can be our first date together and we can keep going on dates like this. I’ll wait for you to make it official when you feel ready. How’s that sound?”

She felt a weight finally be lifted off her shoulder as she let out a sigh, “I’d like that.”

‘I’d like that’? Why did I say that? I barely had the courage to ask what was going on between us, so why the heck did I agree to be the one to make things official?

She was about to bury her hands in her face when she remembers their makeup artist's hard work plastered on her face, causing her to let out a small groan instead.

“Knock, knock, knock!” 

The boisterous voices snapped Amanda out of her dilemma enough to register the two girls who were poking their heads through ATEEZ’s waiting room, “Jiu unnie! Sua unnie!” 

It took only a mere second for the three to run and embrace each other in a seemingly endless hug.

Amanda played with the bright red fringes on Jiu’s shoulder, “I’m loving the red leather outfit today.”

“Why thank you. I am also loving your outfit today.” Jiu complimented back before smiling at the boys, “Good luck on your performance today.”

“You too, noona.” Seonghwa said.

“We are going to be stealing Amanda for a bit. I’m sure there are no complaints about that, right?” Sua glanced around the room for any rejections.

“It should be fine since we won’t be on until later.” Hongjoong replied.

“You can keep her too!” Yeosang added from his spot at the makeup area.

Amanda shot him a menacing glare then faced the girls with a sulking expression, “You see what I have to deal with. Please keep me away from them, unnie.”

“Gladly.” Sua linked arms with Amanda, leading her to the door, “Bye boys!” 

Jiu gave the boys a more appropriate goodbye before following the younger girls. The trio hustle down the corridor, none of them knowing exactly where their destination is, but enjoying every minute of their mini adventure.

“How have you ladies been?” Amanda asked as they began walking down the staircase of the emergency exit.

“Same as I was yesterday when we texted.” Jiu answered.

“What about you? Anything dramatically interesting happen to you in the last 10 hours?” Sua returned the question.

“Well…” She halted her steps on the staircase causing a domino effect on her two unnies.

Noticing Amanda’s cautious gaze, Jiu whispered softly, “What is it, Amanda?”

Amanda took a swift examination of her surroundings, noting that no one was in the near vicinity, “There is something I wanted to ask you guys about. Promise you won’t tell anyone about what I’m about to tell you.”

“Promise.” The duo gave their word with curiosity filled in their eyes.

“I have been going on dates with someone lately.” Amanda hushly confesses.

“What?!?” Sua's impulsive exclamation was instantly covered up by Jiu and Amanda’s hand as the three checked their surroundings again. Sua gave an apologetic smile, “Sorry. I was caught off guard. Since when? No wait, more importantly who?”

Amanda bite her lip. It should be alright to tell them who, right? She already told them she was this much and she fully trusted the girls to keep it a secret.

“You don’t have to tell us if you don’t want to.” Jiu interrupted her thoughts.

“No. I want to. I trust you guys. It’s just I still can’t believe we are friends or that he actually likes me.”

“Why? Who wouldn’t like you?” Sua rhetorically asked.

Amanda casually shrugs, replying with a half jokingly, “My millions of haters.”

“Those are inhumane people. We're talking about actual decent humans, which means the answer is no one.” Sua smugly corrected, making the youngest girl smile. “So will you tell us who it is?”

“Is it an idol?” Jiu added.

Amanda shyly nodded, “It’s Seventeen’s Jeonghan.”

Sua’s jaw slacks as she tries to process the information, “Seventeen, Seventeen?” 

“Is there another kpop group named Seventeen I don’t know about?” Amanda giggled at her friend's reaction.

“You’re lying.” Sua is still in disbelief.

“Do you need proof?”

“Do you have proof?” Sua was only playful teasing her, but Amanda was contemplating seriously. “I’m kidding, I belie-”

”Here.” Amanda pulled out her phone and presented the older girls with a selfie of the two of them that Jeonghan had taken on her phone on their last date.

Sua reached for her phone as Jiu looked over her shoulder to view the photo, “Wow. I can’t believe this.”

“You guys look adorable together.” Jiu cooed. Amanda felt heat run across her cheek. 

“I can’t believe the girl who could hardly talk to guys beside her members is actually dating someone now. Our baby is growing up.” Sua pretends to wipe away tears off her cheek before wrapping her arms around the younger girl. Jiu smiled fondly watching Sua continue to baby Amanda, who was grumbling and squirming her way out of Sua’s hug.

It was nice to see the younger girl be more open and not afraid to be herself. Whenever Jiu was around her, Amanda always had these walls built arounds making it hard for Jiu or anyone for that matter to enter. 

Sua was right. She really has grown up.

Amanda broke free of the hug, “But we aren’t actually dating though. We have confessed we liked each other but we haven’t made it official yet.”

Jiu tilts her head to the side pensively, “Why not?”

Sua dramatically gasped, diverting the two’s attention to her, “Is it because he doesn’t want labels? Because if that’s the case then leave hi-”

“No! Jeonghan isn’t like that.” Amanda quickly shut down the idea. 

“Wow, already defending him, I see.” Jiu says wryly as Sua chortle. These girls were enjoying this way too much.

“I was the one who held off making things official. I guess I was just scared to start dating right away.” Amanda explained to the older girls.

Sua gives an understanding nod, “That makes sense. It’s your first relationship. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

The younger girl smiles, feeling a sense of relief knowing her friends thought the same thing, “But I think I’m ready to make things official now. But I don’t know exactly how to go about it.”

“The best way is to tell him how you feel.” Jiu advised.

Amanda lets out a hopeless sigh, “That’s the problem. I’m not very good at expressing my feelings. Everytime I’m with him I’m lost for words.” 

“Why don’t you text him instead? That way you don’t have to worry about his presence.” Jiu suggested.

“I can write it out for you.” Sua offered, holding up Amanda’s phone, already opening up her text convo with Jeonghan.

“I don't know. Isn’t that a little bit too insincere?” Amanda doubted as the girls nodded in agreement. “I could call him.” She wonder out loud then let out a hopeless sigh, “But I know I’m going to end up saying something stupid.”

“Well we can practice. Pretend I’m Jeonghan. Just say what’s on your mind.” Jiu proposed.

“Okay. Umm, Jeonghan…these past two months with you have been incredible.” Amanda glanced at Jiu seeking some sort of reassurance from her, which Jiu returned with an encouraging nod. “I really-y like spending time with you. I-I….” She let out a groan, “I sound like a bumbling buffoon. I can’t do this.”

Jiu frowns, placing a comforting hand on the younger girl’s shoulder, “You are overthinking this too much.”

Sua decided to approach a different strategy, “Amanda, why do you want to be with Jeonghan?” 

Baffled by her sudden question, Amanda gawked at Sua, “What?”

“Why do you want to be with Jeonghan?” Sua repeated with more emphasis.

“I like Jeonghan.” Amanda confusingly answered, only to see Sua peering at her waiting for something more from her. Amanda gazed at her shoes, “...I really like him. I guess being away from him these past couple of weeks made me realize how much I really do like him. I always get this achy feeling inside me when we haven’t talked for a single day. I don’t want what we have to stop. I want something more. I want to be in a relationship with him even if there’s a huge risk of being together as idols because he makes me happy.”

After a moment of awkward silence for Amanda, she glances up at the two girls who were staring at the youngster in awe. Embarrassed by their gaze and flustered by her own words, she clears her throat and begins to ramble, “You know maybe I should just save myself from future embarrassment and just stop dating all together and then drop off the face of the earth.”

“Stop. What you just said was perfect.” Jiu assured her.

“Yeah, but I really don’t think I’ll be able to say that to him. Nor do I remember everything I just said.

“Well, you don’t have to worry about saying it again.” Sua sheepishly mutters, staring down at Amanda’s phone in her hand. The two girls stare at her waiting for an explainance. Sua gave a remorseful expression, “I may have accidentally dialed his number and this whole conversation is being left as a voicemail.”

“WHAT?!” Amanda rushed off to her, glancing at her phone to see his name and photo on the screen. “Ack! Why haven’t you hung up yet?!” She snatched her phone back, clicking the bright red button, which was similar color to her face at the moment, on her screen. “What am I going to do?” She hung her head and placed her hands on her face.

“This is good actually. You said what you wanted to say without having to say it infront of him. Well now you have.” Jiu attempted the optimistic approach.

Amanda raises her head, “Yeah, but we don’t know when it started leaving a voicemail. What if it only recorded the ending? You know the part where I said that I should stop dating.” 

The older duo remained quiet, not able to refute her statement.

“Amanda, I hate to worsen the atmosphere, but your makeup is smudged.” Jiu softly told her. Amanda let out an anguished groan.

That ominous sensation she had felt all day was rightfully so.

© ateez-amanda — all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, or repost my work.

[aro-oak]

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMeREe6u5/

Oh my god y’all I’m so sorry I was at work and forgot

Y’all can hate TikTok as much as you want but where else are you going to find someone cosplaying The Admiral to an audio of the Juergen leitner rant edited over Juno Steel’s theme music??

[ushisrever]

HELLAUR FELLOW FILO HERE AND I'M SO EXCITED CUZ I JUST DISCOVERED YOUR BLOG AND I JUST FINISHED READING BIBINGKA WITH USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI MY LOVE AND OMFG I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT????? IT'S SO???? PERFECT??? WHOLESOME??? CHEF'S KISS???? NEED I SAY MORE???????? YO SERIOUSLY I GOT SO MUCH KILIG WHEN I READ THAT AND I GOT SO HYPED WHEN I FOUND BIBINGKA CUZ YA KNOW, THERE'S NOT A LOT OF FILO WRITERS ON THIS APP OR AT LEAST THAT I KNOW OF THAT CAN INCLUDE A PART OF OUR FILO CULTURE INTO A FIC WITH A CHARACTER SO PERFECTLY AND YES IK THAT I'M GUSHING BUT REALLY CAN YOU BLAME ME

aight, I'm done, g'night it's 2:21am rn and i hope to see ushijima and bibingkas in my dream tonight😗✌️

Oh my, I just saw this now after finally opening my inbox 😅. I'm glad you liked it! I think one way or another, we all need that kind of ushijima in our life hahahahhahah

[tovanori]

rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better

tagged by: catboy @holy-wi​

tagging : @vampireyongsun, @byulyi, @laikaspeaks @theoriginalmysteryincorporated @depressedgoblinnightmareman @spacedouche only if you guys feel up to it

name/nickname: Toby, Tobb, Todd

gender: nonbinary (demiguy?)

star sign: capricorn

height: 158 cm (5′2″)

time: 10:21am

birthday: december 26

favorite bands: mamamoo ( 마마무 ), Red Velvet, twenty one pilots, bohnes, The Score, Oneus, Onewe, ATEEZ, Safety Suit, Bad Suns, The Rose, K/DA. Of Monsters and Men

favorite solo artists: Suggi, ChungHa, WOODZ, Sunmi, Alec Benjiamin, taemin, (do all of the mamamoo members count lmao? technically they’re all solo artists) Hwasa, Moonbyul, Solar, Wheein

song stuck in my head: BBUSYEO by OneUs

last movie: Iron Man 1

last show: brooklyn 99

when did you create this blog: march 2013 (jesus christ)

what do I post: Personally I just post art from whatever fandom I’m in, but I also reblog whatever from whatever fandom I’m in and shitposts

last thing googled: “loft bed philippines”

do I get asks: sometimes?

why I chose my url: To (from Todd) and Van (From Crevan) and then nori cause I like nori LOL 

following: 191

followers: 15,923

average hours of sleep: uhhh 5???

lucky number: 72

instruments: I only know a lil bit of these instruments, Piano, Bass, Ukulele, snarebox/beatbox, I can barely play the actual drums lol

what am I wearing: sleeveless brown shirt (cause I cut off the sleeves) and black basketball shorts

dream job: living comfortable with no job being a concept artist would be nice, a freelance illustrator is what I am doing rn and it’s not too bad, defo still need to grow more with my art tho

dream trip: country hopping

last book I read: The Blood Of Olympus by Rick Riordan (Last from the Heroes Of Olympus Series)

favorite food: Shrimp, Fries, Korean Chicken, a lot of pork, 

nationality: filipino

favorite songs:

-Windflower by 마마무 -No More Drama by 마마무 -Waggy by 마마무 -Recipe by 마마무 -Travel by  마마무 -Yes I am by  마마무 -Kingdom Come by Red Velvet -Bad Boy by Red Velvet -Psycho by Red Velvet -Grind by Suggi -uwu by suggi -The Message Man by twenty one pilots -Migraine by twenty one pilots -Morph by twenty on pilots -Take It Out on Me by Bohnes -Middle Finger by Bohnes -Rob A Bank by Confetti

top three fictional universes: MCU, Pjato, Life Is Strange