#it's 1am so i'm not sure how coherent this is lol

[singing-swan]

Aaaaand Dawntrail done!!

Overall I had a really good time with it! It isn't my favourite expansion but I went in with very little expectations beyond hoping for a lighter expac to have fun with, and that's what I got so I'm satisfied. I think they've also left a lot of interesting threads hanging that could be picked up later (like what's up with that key!!) so I'm excited to see what they do with them. It definitely felt like this expac was a new beginning setting the stage for more.

My favourite thing was definitely how strong the themes were and how perfectly they evolved with the flow of the story. From learning about cultures to learning about their people, to learning about people as individuals and that to know someone, you also have to accept to be known. And only through knowing and being known can you remember and be remembered in turn. How those we remember are an important part of ourselves and we are an important part of others, too.

I really enjoyed the new characters and new places too, the new zones were gorgeous! Though I have to say I enjoyed the first part a bit more as I liked the fun, low stakes adventures and I think that's the part that let the new characters shine best, Wuk Lamat in particular. It was really nice to see her grow through the rite, and I thought she was very loveable with a strong, if a bit cliché, character arc. They set the wol as her mentor, and I definitely felt proud seeing her use what she learned from her experiences during the second part. We basically helped train the new main character of Tural and that was just really fun hahaha

I do have two main gripes with the writing unfortunately, but I'll put them under a cut so people don't have to see negativity if they don't want to.

The main problem I had was the whole Heritage Found + Solution Nine section, or rather the Sphene parts of it. Those parts felt incredibly repetitive and slowed down the pacing enormously. I started feeling frustrated as it felt like I was seeing the same conversation over and over, when it served no other purpose than to tell us how much Sphene loves her subjects and how much they love her, again and again and again.... It was starting to feel tedious after a while. The pacing picked up again once you defeat Zoraal Ja and discover the Living Memory and she became more engaging once she was fully revealed as a villain, but that part definitely hurt how much I enjoyed her as an antagonist. I think she's full of interesting ideas but to me the execution relied a bit too much on telling rather than showing.

The second gripe is one I also had with 6.x, and it's the feeling that the writers weren't always sure what to do with the returning characters. It wasn't as bad as 6.x (especially as they were meant to take a backseat in this one) and we had some nice moments with them, but I definitely got the impression at times the writers are new to writing with such a big cast, with a tendency to overfocus on their own characters to make up for it, namely Zero in 6.x and Wuk Lamat in DT. And while they're both well written, I don't know if any character is well written enough to handle this amount of spotlight put on them if that makes sense? I have friends who thought she was too present and I understand where they're coming from. In the first part the focus on her was normal but in the second part I feel it'd have been nice to have the screentime shared a bit more, especially for Krile who didn't get enough of it imo. The last zone was a better on that front but it's a bit sad we had to wait until then.

Okay, complaining over now. Despite everything it didn't affect too much my enjoyment of the expac as a whole and I came out of it feeling mainly satisfied. Like I said, all I wanted from it was to have a fun time and I absolutely got that. I can't wait to see more of Tural and I'm excited to see where they take the story next, especially since it seems like shard travel will be a big focus and I'm very intrigued 👀

[oatmilkovich]

I WOULD READ YOUR CLUB KISS ESSAY JUST SAYIN!!!! i got introduced to this series through that one youtube playlist with all their scenes initially and like everything was well and good but pretty sure the club kiss was when i officially forgot how to breathe!!! it still HAUNTS ME TO THIS DAY with how gorgeously it was shot/directed and with such impeccably paced m u s i c but also how significant the whole moment leading up to it is for their relationship. noel's acting in those seconds leading up to it cataloging mickey's journey in a snapshot is POETIC CINEMA!!! cam's too, with ian's calm and confidence shining through, and all his patience in the world for mickey to take his time and absorb his surroundings and MAKE HIS MOVE when he's ready!!! everything about it was just chef's kiss! sighh it makes me miss when scenes were allowed to linger and breathe during those seasons and the magic we got as a result. anywayyy whoops i think i'm gonna end up typing out the club kiss essay myself in your askbox at this rate but it's so good i love it so much and i'm sad that i came late to the fandom and likely missed a lot of the real-time hype of people talking about it :')

THANK YOU for this!! i would happily write an essay on the club kiss + it’s superiority, especially after seeing the mess of a best kiss poll on twitter today... apparently people need reminding. 

it’s just so, so, so significant to mickey and his relationship with his sexuality, with ian, with himself. i like to see the club kiss as his coming out, rather than 4x11... cause well, i won’t get into that. ian is so patient with him and lets him figure it out on his own – which is so important, he makes that step himself! it’s the first time he’s declaring them in front of other people! the lights, the music, the direction – god, it all comes together so beautifully. the way they stare at each other before. the fact we never see them pull away from each other – they’re living in their moment of freedom and get lost in it because they’ve never ever been allowed to be so carefree before. they get to kiss how they’ve always wanted to. it’s about mickey’s bravery and boldness, ian’s patience and acceptance. it’s this huge crescendo for their storyline and everything that has come previously – yes, we knew mickey had feelings for ian prior to this, obviously, but it’s the first time we truly see him act on it publicly and giving us the possibility that maybe, just maybe, he might get to the point where he’ll feel safe enough to come out of the closet. plus, the club kiss totally plays into the “what you and i have makes me free.” – they’re surrounded by people but they’re together and free. 

plus as you said, the kiss is long and the director really allowed to scene to breathe which so very rarely happens these days. there’s a lovely storyline arc within the moments before the kiss itself – mickey’s defence, his apprehension, his fear and then his acceptance. it’s the first time they’re really allowed to linger, consider, and get lost in a moment with each other and that just... means everything to me. they’re not kissing because they’re scared or worried about losing each other, they’re not kissing because they’re trying to prove a point, they’re kissing simply because – for the first time ever – they can. 

i was lucky enough to be around prior to 4x08 airing so i can remember how fucking amazing and unexpected it was when the episode came out – it was like, 1am and i tried so so hard not to scream. i can probably find my live tweets of excitement from that day, lol. i hope this is even remotely coherent, i’ve been at work all day and i’m heading to bed soon but i didn’t want to go to sleep without answering, i’m just... always here to talk about this kiss. please feel free to come into my inbox and ramble if you want some of that hype <3 

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

I'm ftm (pre everything) and am in choir but I also want to sing and maybe pursue it later but if I go on hormones then I'm afraid I won’t be able to. Advice?

Lee says:

I like singing, how will T affect my voice?

We can’t tell you what will happen to your voice- people tend to be able to sing well (once their voice is done changing!) if they could sing well before, but there are instances of people losing their singing voices.

We’ve anecdotally heard of some people on T being able to keep their high notes, but it’s much more likely that you lose your high notes as your vocal cords thicken. 

T will most likely deepen your voice so your range will change, but as long as you continue to practice and don’t overwork your voice into notes you cannot reach anymore your singing voice probably will be okay- different, but okay.

But we can’t guarantee this, and it’s your decision whether testosterone and passing/being comfortable in your body are worth the risks of losing your singing voice for you.

This post has a bit more on singing

The Changing Female-To-Male (FTM) Voice

The Changing Female-To-Male (FTM) Voice Pedagogical Notes 

Testosterone And The Trans Male Singing Voice

Training the Transgender Singer: Finding the Voice Inside

Followers, any examples of trans singers on T for us to add? Or any personal experiences to add on?Followers, any personal experiences to add?

Followers say:

aeolianchemistry said: have a lot to say about this! i may not be the most coherent bc im half asleep lol, but anyone feel free to message me about this anytime and ask for more details!,

this was my biggest Thing when i was deciding to pursue hrt. ive been in various choirs for years, and its a very Important part of my life. but also my voice was my #1 source of dysphoria, and the #1 thing i needed to change. i searched for weeks to find anything about what to expect from hrt as a singer, esp bc ive heard stories of trans ppl losing their siging voice entirely. i was terrified, and couldnt find resources to shed any significant light on the topic.

and so, in no particular order bc im half asleep, here are some things to expect and things that i’ve experienced so far (almost six months on hrt):

- practice while your voice is dropping! feel it out every step of the way. get to know your voice while it’s changing, and try to maintain those high notes. i didnt do a v good job of this and my high range kinda just shriveled up. i cant be sure that it wouldve been hugely different if id practiced more, but ive heard it does help

- yoir voice will feel different. unfamiliar at times. you wont be using it the same way youre used to. technique will change, placement will change

- my speaking voice shifted downward after just a month or two (i had mild hyperandrogynism before, so this wont be as quick for everyone), before my singing voice did. i didn’t start getting new low range until later, but within my pre-t vocal range, my voice just sat a bit lower than it used to. my low alto filled out more. than i started getting new notes, slowly

- there will be periods of time where it cracks or breaks or is unreliable. dont push it, but dont despair either. keep practicing as well as you can

- my voice is somewhat fragile. if i yell (which i can only somewhat do currently) or push it or force it thru cracks/breaks/weak spots, it will get tired easily and take quite a while to recover. be nice to your voice. dont push high notes if they cause strain. dont push the low notes either, even tho im sure youre excited about them

- your voice will be weak while it’s shifting. this can cause frustration and anxiety. i’m two months into my choir season singing w two and a half choirs, and i’m dealing w lots of Complicated Feelings bc my voice just cant do all the things i want it to. i cant project much, and i certainly dont have the strength (yet) to audition for any of the solos i’d like to. Patience

- the Weird Spots and the Weak Spots will continue to shift around. i have this one area in the middle of my range (currently its about Ab3-B3, but a few weeks ago it was B3-C4) where its weird and weak and its kind of like a break in register but also a bit like a black hole, bc i Cannot Project there and theres no good placement for singing those notes, and notes in the vicinity of those are also Weird but Less So. it’s slowly sliding downwards, and i am learning to navigate it better. i’m hoping it will settle and go away soon, but we’ll see

- breath support is v important. as mentioned, your voice may be quite fragile, and putting strain on it could cause it to glitch out on you for a while. supporting your voice w lots of breath will put less demand on your vocal chords

- NEVER SING IN A BINDER or compressive garment. you need those lungs!

- you’re going to miss out on some of the nostalgic singalongs of old choir songs, bc you no longer have the range to sing your old parts. this is possibly the #1 consequence of transitioning that im the most sad about lol

- i have a very weird quality to my high range rn. it seems to be caught midway between the head voice it used to be and future falsetto or whatever it’s moving toward. for now its just Strange to listen to

the current state of my voice is this:

low range is down to almost the bottom of the bass clef. i can sing down to Bb2, A2 on a good day.

from there up to F3ish is quite comfy and possibly the strongest part of my singing voice, but i do find that if i spend too much time down there it can strain the rest of my range (i used to have this problem before too: if i sang in my low alto range too much or too enthusiastically, my sop range would get tired).

from G3-C4, it’s Awkward. the Awkwardness shifts around, and some parts of it can be more comfy than others sometimes, but it’s all v inconsistent. i cant project much here, and placement is veryvery Weird.

D4-F4ish is typically comfy but has a bit of that Strange quality to it. these notes are a bit floaty, but not bad.

G4-B4 are unreliable. somedays i can get up there. some days it’ll blink out or crack or break or just Not Be There. i am predicting that once my high range settles into a proper falsetto, i’ll be able to work on this range more and it’ll have less of that Strange quality to it, but only time will tell

again, apologies for being Scattered, it’s 1am and ive had a long day. any of yall are welcome to message me for more details ☺

there is a lot of weirdness and weakness and Awkward in the transition period. but while i’m frustrated at times, i’m not worried. everything i’m dealing w is temporary. now i can’t be 100% sure how my voice will settle or when, but i’m not afraid i’ve lost it forever. as far as i’ve heard, the stories of trans ppl who lose their singing voice on t are very rare cases. youre going to go through weeks or months where singing is Weird in constantly shifting ways, but itll keep on moving and developing, and personally i’m so excited to see where it goes.

i’m currently singing tenor2 in my choirs, and occasionally i get to take a trip down and sing baritone. im not even 6months in! that has transformed my choir experience to be even better than before, even w all the awkwardness. it was so weird and beginning to get verg uncomfy to be in a place like choir, which is so important to me, which i love dearly, which has had a significant impact on my life, but which revolved around the use of my one most dysphoric feature. but now i don’t have to worry about that. now i can sing the parts i’ve been wanting to sing for years.

i do occasionally miss some of my old voice. i miss soaring soprano lines, i miss all the old alto parts in songs i used to know. i miss the confidence and strength of a familiar, complete voice. and im allowed to miss those, i dont feel bad about having that longing or sadness, bc i have zero regrets. i also occasionally miss playing with and styling my super long hair, but in five years i have not once regretted cutting it all off. i own those memories and that nostalgia, but i keep moving forward to new and better things

pinesboi said: If you keep working at your voice and take lessons to make sure you never let it get out of practice, everything should be okay. I’m on T now about 3-4 months, and I’m still singing high tenor musical theatre

[minhyukie]

ok i'm one of the anons that wanted to eventually come to you to tell you about my experience with the mx concert in sf! not sure if you remember (disclaimer might have a lot of typos and stuff bc it's 1am and i've busted.. so many nuts) but here goes...ok but.... minhyuk is A God. i couldn't stop thinking how ethereal he looked? the light was hitting all the right places and wow... he is just heavenly. but yeah honestly all of the members are exactly how i thought they'd be!! i was rly into

-- kihyun's presence tho omg. the memebers call him a stinky dancer but honestly he exudes so much energy that it just didnt even matter anymore he's just AGHH i cannot even describe it was just amazing. even else was just so lovely on stage and wow we rly stan kings. i rly want to say more but maybe tmr when my thoughts are more coherent lol. uhm but HITOUCH i have to talk about! kihyun was just so personable and endearing i said i love you and he just looked so happy salalksdlk. i had no idea what to expect from hitouch (like can we hold their hands or was it just a high five idk??? i always here diff things). next was wonho and he just looked soooo full of love? i couldn't even believe it he looks incredible soft in person... our soft capt korea. HE HELD MY HAND FOR SO LONG AND LOOKED AT ME IN THE EYES WITH SUCH WARMTH I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA DIE. i'm a wonho stan (is actually a jooheon stan but maybe not anymore after tonight LOL i kid but uhm). shownu is awkward as i thought he'dbe but it made the moment funnier bc i rly held (well gripped rly lmao) but i saw shownu swing his hands for a high 5 and i accidentally rly went for it and wow the sound that came out of the high 5 LMAO i'm... :))) tbh the 3 that came next was such a blur sdklsflkdsf i wanna do my moment with them. I remember jookyun saying thank you and jooheon's cold hands LOL (what a gr8 way to meet the loml). i couldnt even remember minhyuk for some reason i h8 how it goes so fast AHHH

aaaaaaaaaaa hello!!!!!! please this is very coherent considering all the nut busting this made me smile so much :””) i agree with what you said about the concert!!! the lighting hitting minhyuk.... hnhnhnnbgf King!!!!! and Same like they call kihyun a stinky dancer but he has so much passion pls i know nothing about dance but i would never guess he’s one of the ‘worst’ in the group he has a great stage presence? i..... couldn’t look away from him for parts of the concert jfdklsf Wow what a boy

HI TOUCH............ fhdgsdds i would’ve blanked out for all of them please .. especially kihyun and wonho that sounds so sweet it sounds like they always put all their heart into these little meetings i’ve seen a lot of people say how intimate it felt :((( i can’t believe u really got to meet them and be up close with them!!! seeing their smiles at you WOW and it sounds like you had a really amazing time at the concert too i’d love to hear more later if you still have more stories :”) this was so cute to read and makes me so happy that u got to see them and meet them!!!! ily!!!!!