#it's 12:41am i have to be up in 6 hrs w h a t a m i d o i n g

[seesbeavty-blog]

pro-tip!!! slam ur hand in the door while you’re trying to get laundry done — your middle finger will wind up so sore that you can’t even give the universe the bird for that one, just swear loudly and cry. anyway, what up y’all ?? my name is mj, which definitely stands for bad mamma jamma, and this here’s lily, which prob doesn’t stand for . . . idk, lovely incandescent lady yodeling. there’s some little ditties about her under the cut, and some more info on her about page. i’m still constructing lily’s wanted connections, but if you’d like to plot, either   send!!   me a mssg or   like!!   this here and i’ll come to you ✌

not a lot’s changed between 1970s!lily and Modern!lily when it comes to her childhood, esp pre-hogwarts years. still muggle-born, still became the younger sister and the walking-talking embodiment of the Dreaded Youngest Child — her parents doted on her a bit, so lily was able to get away with quite a lot where petunia wasn’t. her world still grew much more wondrous after this sallow, skinny-looking kid with an alliterative name introduced her to the idea of being a witch, and her and severus still became friends after he became her doorway to the wizarding world. petunia and lily still fell out, she still saw her best friend off to slytherin, and got sorted into gryffindor “”barely a second after [the hat] had touched the dark red hair””” ( sidenote: what a draco malfoy-level of quick-sorting nonsense ) and stuck in the same house as the kids who’d poked fun at them on the train

the greatest change from the ‘70s to 2000s came from changes in the muggle world. petunia & lily were always going to fall out due to their mutual jealousy and stark difference in personality, but now dividing lines in politics split them even further. lils followed into her parents’ footsteps of being very liberal and pro-labour ( things that basically impossible NOT to be when you live in northern post-industrial-heyday cokeworth ), but tuney went suddenly all rogue and conservative and lily could. not handle that — and it also didn’t hurt that lily had gone swanning off to hogwarts and had never been around to see why tuney had changed her . . . tune. ( wince. ) ( and like total sidebar but like. u thought pet & lily had their issues before. imagine them all being played out on facebook and twitter, arguing back & forth about brexit and refugees and labour rights like no ) it all really came to a head in the summer between fifth and sixth year when lily came home to discover her sister had packed up and out and had moved in with her horrid new boyfriend in london. she viewed this as the final betrayal to their family, responded with a Temper, and has effectively shut petunia out of her life ever since.

getting to be a part of hogwarts w/o the growing threat of voldemort constantly hanging over her head tho did help to shape lily something differently. she really wasn’t worried about anti-muggle sentiments b/c it all seemed like a load of talk, but she was also in p consistent contact w/ them all the time b/c of her friendship with sev & involvement in potions class with prof sluggie & generally just how often she was around slytherin house. i imagine that in those first couple of years as she got hit with the shock of how being muggle-born did matter and the sudden slurs and cruel comments, she wore down p quick and started lashing out — she got handy w/ a hex here or there and her speciality became transfiguring anyone who dared call her or her own a mudblood into a talking teapot. her friendship w/ sev definitely got tested or maybe even broken clear off earlier than occurred in canon

so like i’m not saying lils was a “””problem child””” who “””found home in detention more than she was in her own dorm””” but like yea that’s exactly what i’m saying. but like she mellowed out a lot around 3rd year, started using her words as weapons instead of her wand. think more delightfully cheeky than delinquently cursing.

lily does p well as far as classes go ; she’s best at potions & transfiguration ( and like total sidenote again but she’s definitely interested in becoming a wizard pharmacist potioneer once she’s done with school ) but the pits when it comes to astronomy, and yea that prob has to do w/ how you have to be very patient w/ astronomy and how esp in the hp universe it’s more astrology and figurative, and you also have to sit in one spot and not be 110% engaged all the time, which lily is not here for

imagine lily now as something more of a mix of child!lily and youngsjw! lily : she’s very energetic & extroverted, and likes to get along w/ most of everyone which is helped by her warm nature, but she’s also got this chip on her shoulder and is very inflexible when it comes to her beliefs, whether it’s about the nonsense of blood purity or which kind of jam works best with toast

she's also developed this. really strong distaste for authority figures?? like every time someone else has been the authority she's always found that they've obscured the truth or out-right lied, so lily just doesn't trust most of them unless they can prove themselves honest. she's put a really strong emphasis on honesty too, and strives for it maybe a little too much because she'd rather tell the truth than lie to protect someone else's feelings

summers seem to be the time for change in lily’s life, tho. she’d kind of established this balance back into her life, but after the snaps surfaced this summer her world got knocked back off its axis as muggle and muggle-born discrimination went from talk to action. lily didn’t have to just try and protect herself and her friends anymore from callous words ; she had to protect everyone, including her own muggle family so separate from the rest of the world, from actual malice. lily’s not in consistent contact with petunia anymore, esp not when it’s anything about magic, but she’s decided to keep her family as informed and safe as she can so she’s trying to reach out to her sister again — no matter how much pet’s apparently impending nuptials to vernon dursley make her want to throw up in her mouth just a little

so since returning to school this year, she’s been of a much more serious mind than she used to, tho she’s prideful af and has been trying to not let anyone see her shaken. she and a few of the other older muggle-borns have set up this quiet, secretive little safe space for their kind, moving around secret support meetings in different spots around the castle, and she’s been particularly looking after the younger kids

lily’s also developed her own hypocritical prejudice towards purebloods over the years, but it’s blossomed out fantastically after the scare this past summer. she used to be mostly a reactor, going up against someone else’s unjust acts and not throwing the punch first b/c chivalry and all that — now she’s worried about herself and her own, and that worry’s gone to paranoia that makes her much more likely to fly off the handle first so like someone please push her