#it’ll work this time guys they’ll win this time

[apollos-boyfriend]

i don’t think purpled ever told people he died after the fact. why would he? only quackity and slime were really around to witness it. had a body even been left, i doubt either dream or punz would’ve gone out of their way to retrieve it. no, purpled merely spawned back in, jolting awake in his bed with dogchamp by his side, and moved on with his life as if nothing happened. admitting his death showed weakness. showed vulnerability. people could exploit him if they knew he no longer had a perfect three lives, could hold it over his head like he’d seen time and time again. that’s not to mention the embarrassment of failure, of dying to slime of all things, so he doesn’t tell them. doesn’t admit to anyone what happened to him that day, what he failed to accomplish. and to his defense, nearly all the server doesn’t do as much as bat an eye, as he expected. no one cares, after all. but he’s wrong.

jack knows. jack crawled out of hell, after all, carving footholds into burning brimstone with his own two hands. he can recognize death when he sees it, a soul taking one step closer to the unforgiving void.

tubbo knows. tubbo’s been surrounded by death since he arrived on these lands, both of others and his own. he’s seen how it changes and warps people, even when they swear they won’t let it. it’s an inevitability, he thinks.

ponk, hannah, and boomer know. the three of them have known purpled for long enough to know when something is wrong. and even if they didn’t, they’re too well-acquainted with magic and life to not notice a that a third of person’s life force has been ripped away from them.

[badjokesbyjeff]

There were three race horses; ernie, bill, and ted. 

the three of them were good friends; they enjoyed racing each other and generally won and lost to each other equally. every evening, after the races, they went to a local bar to relax and drink some beer. they would often discuss racing techniques, their families, etc.

one season, bill wasn't doing so well. he rarely beat the other two, and was worried that he'd be sent to the glue factory if his luck didn't change. one night, at the bar, he talked with ernie and ted about it.

"you know, guys, i just can't figure it out," he said. "everything's fine at home; the kids are doing great, my wife is being nice, the bills are paid, my mother-in-law rarely visits - nothing could be better. maybe i'm just getting old. if things don't pick up soon, they'll send me to the glue factory."

the bartender, a big llama from peru, overheard the conversation. he looked around, to make sure nobody else was listening, then said, "hey, pal, i got something for you that'll make you feel like a young colt again." he reached under the bar and pulled out an unlabeled bottle of beer. "here, drink this; i guarantee you'll start winning again. come by each night for a week and I'll give you one. if it doesn't work, i'll give you double your money back!"

bill looked at ernie and ted, who only shrugged, then drank the contents of the bottle. "oh, just one thing," the llama said, "it'll make your ass itch, but that's okay; it's just a side effect. don't worry about it." the three horses stayed a few hours, played a few games of pool and darts, and went home.

over the course of the next three days, they went back to the bar each night, and bill continued the regimen of mystery beer. his racing times did improve! he was slowly moving back up in the rankings, and was soon back into the top three with ernie and ted. bill was ecstatic, and thanked the llama profusely.

"hey, my pleasure," said the llama.

a few weeks passed by, and ernie started slowing down. after losing three races in a row, he sobbed to himself, "i just don't get it. my life couldn't be better. i can't believe I'm getting old! they'll send me to the glue factory if i don't get back in the groove!"

that evening, at the bar, he told the llama bartender about his troubles, and asked if he too could try the mystery beer. "okay, but remember, it'll make your ass itch - but don't pay it no mind. it's just a harmless side effect."

"no problem. it'll be worth it to get back in the groove," ernie said.

a few days went by. ernie's ass did indeed itch, but after a few more days, his races improved, and he was back in the top three with bill and ted.

at the bar one evening, ernie bought a round of beers for all the horses, and thanked the llama profusely.

"i just can't believe how great that mystery beer worked!" ernie said. "you're sitting on a gold mine, there!" the llama said it was his pleasure, don't worry about it, etc.

a few more weeks went by, and now ted started slowing down, losing races. he, too realized that he'd be shipped off to the glue factory unless his races improved.

"say," he said to the llama one night after a particularly humiliating loss, "i think i need to try that mystery beer too. they'll ship me off to the glue factory for sure if I don't start winning again."

"no problem," the llama said, pulling out an unlabeled bottle. "here. come back every night, and i guarantee you'll be back in top form again, or i'll give you double your money back."

over the course of the next few weeks, ted's races continued to improve until he was back in the top three with bill and ernie. he pranced into the bar, full of vim and vigor, and thanked the llama profusely. "you know, my ass itches a lot; it's almost unbearable. but i can't thank you enough. they would have turned me into glue by now if it weren't for you. anything you want, let me know and i'll see what i can do."

"no problem," said the llama, "i make this beer at home using an ancient inca recipe. it's just my way of thanking my regular customers for their patronage over the years."

"i'm not kidding," ted said, "this is the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. anything, you name it, anything you want, let me know, and it's yours."

"well, now that you mention it..." the llama began -

right then, a greyhound walked up to the bar. he was obviously depressed.

"barkeep, give me something strong. i'm on a losing streak you wouldn't believe," the greyhound said.

ted looked at the greyhound, then at bill and ernie, and said, "hey, look! a talking dog!"

[vernoniekiss]

svt when their idol s/o win an award | [ ot13 ]

a/n: hi guys, had this in my draft for along time. currently working on the requests sent ! underestimated how long it’ll take to think of how each members would act in these scenarios.

[🫧] seungcheol

- really proud of you. stands up to clap for you, you bet he’s tryna clap louder than everyone.. shares all photos taken of you with your reward on his story, weverse with the caption “proud of you”.

[🫧] jeonghan

- he makes all the members clap for you (they’ll all clap for you even without him asking of course). “aigoo~ you won” he’ll say while pinching your cheeks. he’ll treat you for dinner that night!

[🫧] joshua

- his ◠‿◠ smile is what shows up on the big screen after you were presented your reward. he’s so proud of you, those late nights he stayed up with you working on your song. all paid off in the end.

[🫧] junhui

- happy boy. cheering you on from his seat. the type to jump up and down from his seat as well though. awkward hug when you come back because of the camera on you guys.

[🫧] hoshi

- cheering for you, cheering for you LOUDLY at the ceremony that you can hear him all the way from the stage 😞. let’s everyone know he’s your number1 supporter. takes a lot of pictures of you and your reward (makes you do horanghae:/ )

[🫧] wonwoo

- claps and smiles. gives you a massive smile when you’re in your seat but when you’re in private he’ll give you millions of hugs and kisses. “i’m so proud of you..”

[🫧] woozi

- dad smile when you’re doing your speech. deep down, he’s really proud of you. those lates night you’ll stay with him at his studio going over your song, the lyrics, the beats. worth it all. wouldn’t trade the smile you had when they announced you as a winner for anything.

[🫧] dokyeom

- cheering for you LOUDLY. beaming at you from his seat. “i knew you could do this!” gives you a big kiss on the cheek when you’re back next to him.

[🫧] mingyu

- also posts you everywhere !! he’s so proud of you. the type to shed a few tears when you. gives you a massive hug when you come back to your seat. forehead kisses !! lots of them.

[🫧] minghao

- posts you on his story as well. when you’re at home, he hugs you tight while swaying you both side to side. a lot of kisses that night with praises “well done 宝贝 [baby]”.

[🫧] seungkwan

- he’s so so sooooo proud of you. he promotes your win on his social media and also sings your songs during karaoke whenever he can. holds your hand for the rest of the night :) not afraid to show affection in public.

[🫧] vernon

- proud of you, sits there nodding his head with a smile whiling looking at you on the big screen. side-hugs you when you come back to your seat which is designated right next to him.

[🫧] chan

- like a proud dad 100%. clapping loudly with a huge smile. has his arms out waiting for you to give him a hug when you’re off the stage. give the man the hug !!!!!

[lild00td00t]

Straw Hats with a Shy! S/O

Part 1

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Ussop

I love shy, quiet people, they are my jam !! Part 2 will be up when it’s finished, and will include: Robin, Nami, Franky and Brook! Enjoy ! ~

Luffy

• Will definitely be your voice if you need it, he loves talking enough for the both you so things work out favorably with Luffy.

• If anyone ever asks why you’re so quiet or don’t talk to them he gets defensive on your part, asking why they’re bothering you in the first place

• If he ever senses you’re uncomfortable he’ll draw attention to himself to get eyes off you

• When he does, it’s in the most asinine way possible

• “ YOU GUYS WANNA SEE IF I CAN EAT THIS WHILE ITS STILL ON FIRE “

• Hypes you up to do stuff, say you’re making a call or you ordered on your own, he’ll pat you on the back and be like “ yeah that was awesome ! “

• So sweet, but he can definitely be overwhelming with how boisterous and out going he is, sometimes he might push alittle too much to get his S/O out of their comfort zone

• Id give him a 7/10

Zoro

• Probably loves how quiet you are, especially when he’s drinking, he loves a calm drinking partner

• Like many of the Straw Hats he’ll get very defensive on your part if people tell you to speak up, won’t tolerate people picking on you for being quiet either

• He lets you lean into him or hold his arm if you’re feeling shy, he’ll probably try to look more intimidating to others so they’ll leave you two alone

• Zoro isn’t much of a people person either, so he’d rather be in secluded and low activity places.

•he’ll gladly find you a space so you can both relax and decompress

• I’d give Zoro a 9/10 with a shy S/O, mostly because he won’t make you feel overwhelmed, and while he’s not vocally encouraging you most of the time he does actively urge you through other means to do daily tasks you might struggle in <3

Sanji

• Will kick a hole in someone’s face if they ever tell you to speak up

• The absolute sweetest of all the Straw Hats with a Shy S/O

• He can tell if you’re overwhelmed or in need of alone time, he’ll make you a nice warm cup of tea and probably set out a chair on the deck for you to relax in

• Will definitely tell Luffy to keep it down for you, and WILL resort to violence if he doesn’t, if his S/O wants peace and quiet then SHH!

• 100% sends food back if it’s not cooked how you like or came with something you don’t like, he won’t make a big deal about it either since he knows it’ll probably embarrass you, but is always willing to be your voice when you need it

• Very keen listener who is also observant, he can read your body language and tell if you’re uncomfortable, he has signals for the two of you if you ever want to leave somewhere!

• He will either coddle his S/O or try his best to encourage them, but he doesn’t want them to feel smothered, he’s so supportive honestly

• I give Sanji a 10/10 with a Shy S/O!

Ussop

• Honestly he’s the funniest with a shy S/O

• If you give him permission, he’ll tell people an impossibly HUGE lie about how you lost your voice and why you can’t speak, whether or not people believe it is the tricky part

• He loves having you sit with him while he fishes, unlike Luffy you don’t eat all the bait AND you’re a great ear, so it’s a win win !

• Like Sanji he’s extremely observant, maybe it’s the Haki, maybe it’s because he’s an awesome boyfriend, regardless he can read your expressions and body languages with ease

• The second he sees you’re uncomfortable though, VERY much like his captain and best friend Luffy, he’ll draw attention to himself

• Will definitely encourage you to try and get out of your comfort zone, hes not pushy or commanding but very gentle about it too

• If you order something over the phone or manage to have a conversation with someone you don’t know well he’ll definitely voice how proud he is of you!

• I give Ussop a 10/10 with a shy S/O <3

[inchidentally]

as someone who doesn’t take immediate post race teammate rivalry seriously bc it’s usually gone by the next race if not sooner

straight up cannot believe the almost fan fic way Lando and Oscar have always coped with supporting each other even through their own sometimes exceptionally bitter disappointments ?? Oscar showing up for Lando with smiles and pride and Lando thanking Oscar after his race win and then both ALWAYS being sure to point out their strengths that race and today Lando rushing to congratulate Oscar in the media pen and during the group photo Lando looks wearily to Oscar when the smile can drop from his face and Oscar patting him on the knee with that understanding look on his face (and the team making sure to bring out the sprint plaques so there’s something next to Lando!!)

like trust and believe they’ll have their tricky times where something is said immediately post race to the press or on the radio that’ll be uncomfortable but ultimately forgotten once the red mist has cleared bc that’s Normal Teammate Behavior! it’s the nature of the sport and the nature of teammates! these guys know the drill and how to get past them for the sake of harmonies and/or friendship <3

but for the youngest pairing on the grid who’ve been together just a season and a half like, I bring up the normalcy of teammates bickering and in fighting bc it’s truly remarkable how that hasn’t happened yet for them ?? I’m not being a downer I just genuinely want us to fully appreciate that even when they do eventually publicly squabble it’ll be in comparison to just how mature and genuinely proud and respectful of each other they always are !! that Andrea deserves so much credit for raising them in an atmosphere of team first but also how Lando and Oscar have individually taken those lessons and truly truly like each other and they asked for that privacy door to be installed in the team hub so that their rooms can be separated from everyone but each other and that they have little private voices they do together and we keep on finding out that they hang out outside work but choose to not post about it or turn it into PR for social media and just !!!

like yes I’m insane AND stupid but also they’ve proven themselves to be something special so it’s not entirely my fault !!

[youcouldmakealife]

SOTM: Erin/Julius, grudge match

For the prompt: Julius' exit from the Oilers

Julius was never going to stay. Erin doesn’t really know how anyone could have expected otherwise. Sure, she knows the expectation, that if you’re a franchise saviour you stay with the franchise, give it your all, saw that play out with Bryce even though fans acted like he was team whipping boy instead of franchise saviour half the time.

But the thing is, the Oilers have been beyond saving for the entire time Julius has been there. There’s only so much one guy can do, no matter how good they are. And Julius is so good, and he tries so hard. Everything he can do, he has done, nobody could say otherwise, doesn’t slack off on the ice in any game situation, works to win the team games. But they don’t win, most games. They don’t win, because they’ve got a mismanaged team and what the old boys club might call a loser culture. Nobody’s expecting to win games, the players included, and they’re usually right.

Erin’s not like, saying that out loud any time soon, but whatever. It’s true. She likes some of the Oilers as people, has a game buddy in Farmer’s girlfriend, who is one of the funniest people she’s ever met. She likes the city okay, close enough to pop in on mom and dad but far enough they don’t really pop in on her, except for the occasional visit when the Canucks come to town, because Jared’s indisputably their favourite child. There’s nothing personal about Julius’ decision to move on, on his end or hers.

Well, mostly. Erin’s never understood how Deslauriers has kept his job so long, considering he hasn't made the Oilers any better, but they’re not worse, not that that’s saying much. Unfortunately he’s still in charge of the whole operation, and she’s a teensy bit biased against him due to the whole being raging homophobe who tried to destroy her brother’s life because he was gay thing.

Like, just a smidge. Giving the TV the middle finger every time they show his face level. Julius has been smart enough never to introduce them level. Erin’s the only one allowed to destroy her brother’s life, and she sure as shit would never do that because of Bryce, who’s like, the best thing about Jared. By far Jared’s best life decision, full stop, was somehow winning over Bryce Marcus despite his horrible personality.

Well, after adopting Julius. Erin’s pretty grateful for that one, to be honest.

The summer before Julius’ contract expires, he goes into contract talks, though he has zero intention of staying. The talk is basically ‘thanks, but no thanks'.

Erin has no clue why it takes so many meetings to get that across; maybe they’re being too polite about it, or the Oilers are being a little too obtuse, because ‘no thank you’ is three words, as are ‘please trade me’. But after those talks end Oilers management doesn’t say anything to the media except that ‘they’re working on something that works for both parties’, which must be difficult, considering Julius’ current ask is ‘no amount of money will make me stay’, which she’s pretty sure is hard to match.

Or like. Maybe there is enough money. Theoretically, there could be a magic number of money. Like, a mindboggling amount of money might do it. But they haven’t offered him it. They’ve offered him fair value, market rate, but the thing about market value is that the market’s going to offer him that too, and testing the market means he doesn’t have to play for Edmonton anymore.

But nobody gets it. Going into his final contract season, the media’s talking about how much it’ll take to re-sign him, how sweet a deal they’ll have to make it, and she almost wishes that someone would leak the fact he isn’t going to stay so that fans would feel a little less betrayed down the line. But apparently the Oilers front office is a tight ship, or they’re still firmly in denial, hoping Julius is going to change his mind.

Erin’s never seen Julius change his mind on anything big. Or even little. He hates watermelon. He’s never actually tried watermelon, but he’s decided he hates it, so obviously trying it would be silly. This is the person they’re expecting to change his mind. The person Erin has debated force feeding watermelon, because he thinks it tastes like watermelon flavour and nothing tastes like watermelon flavour, she doesn’t know what the fuck watermelon flavour tastes like, but it is not watermelon.

Anyway, he doesn’t change his mind. Shockingly.

A week before the trade deadline Erin walks in the door to find Julius sitting at the dining room table in the half dark of twilight, chin on his fist. He looks like a stock photo: ‘sad man brooding’ or ‘gloomy Finn’ or something, so defeated that Erin doesn’t have the heart to give him shit. Well, almost. She wouldn’t want him to get a big head or anything.

“Pretending you’re the protagonist in a sad indie movie, huh?” Erin asks.

“I don’t know that one, protagonist,” Julius says, then, when she turns the overhead light on, “Ow!”

“Main character syndrome,” Erin says, as Julius squints at her, looking betrayed. He’s not a vampire — he’ll survive a little light.

“Is that what you said Jared has?” Julius asks, and Erin laughs. She can’t even remember saying that, though it must have been years ago. Years ago Erin was right, though.

“Probably,” Erin says, leaning on the table so Julius is forced to look at her instead of into the abyss or whatever. “What’s up?”

“They’re going to boo me for the rest of my career,” Julius says.

“Flames fans don’t even boo Bryce anymore,” Erin says. “Rest of your career’s a stretch.”

“That isn’t true,” Julius says.

“Okay, they don’t boo like, every time he has the puck,” Erin says. That’s basically the same, right? He has to earn the boos by scoring, or assisting, or holding onto the puck a little too long, or — anyway, they boo a whole lot less than they did initially, which is her point. People have short memories, and, more importantly, they’re lazy. Hating someone takes too much energy, long term. They’ll have found someone else to hate by then — some other poor, talented kid doing his best while he’s stuck on a team with no ambition.

“Have they traded you?” Erin asks.

“I think they’re about to,” Julius says.

“Like gut feeling or—“ Erin says.

“My agent told me to keep my phone close,” Julius says.

So probably actually about to, then. She knew it was coming, unless Deslauriers was stupid and stubborn enough to keep Julius until the end, let him walk for free. Which she wouldn’t put past the guy or anything, but still. It was coming.

“You’ve been waiting for this,” Erin says.

“I know,” Julius says.

“You want this,” she says. Getting traded at the deadline, people get a chance to get used to him in another uniform. If he stays until the end, the Oilers don’t get anything for him, but the Oilers fans are going to expect him to stay, hate him if he doesn't. Even more than they will this way, she means.

“I do,” Julius says. “You’ll come with me, right?”

“As long as it’s to a decent city, sure,” Erin says, and the offence on his face is exactly what he deserves for asking such a ridiculous fucking question in the first place.

[cocogum]

How Qilby should’ve destroyed the World of Twelve 💖

(written by yours truly ✨)

Ngl here but Qilby did a bad job trying to destroy the World of Twelve and bring the eliatrope kids with him.

Since he’s gilf material, I decided I was gonna list everything he should’ve done in alphabetical order so that he’ll learn from his past mistakes and try again 🥰🥰

What he wants is: discover the Krosmoz with his brothers and sisters and rule the eliatrope race.

Okay got it, I can make this work 👍

So after a few plannings, I finally did a proper list sheet. Here’s what I recommend babes should’ve done ✨:

#1: Don’t bring Adamaï and Grougal in your lab.

Your ass is aware that Grougal only breaks shit on a constant basis so don’t bring him in your lab where thousands of creatures and experiments have helped the eliatrope race survive and thrive without their home planet. Also, don’t bring Adamaï either cuz that little ugly lizard’s gonna help too.

#2: Don’t convince Adamai and Grougal to go with you. Just kill them.

Adamaï is specifically related to a stubborn moron who yells half the time when he swings that sword so he’ll obviously won’t be swayed by your words. Instead, what you could do, is talk and let out all your thoughts to him so you could get it out of your system (cuz girlie deserves to vent for a bit ✨).

Then, after you’re done, just kill Adamaï and Grougal. Like that, all your venting would’ve just been actual venting instead of hearing an ugly ass lizard talk back and tell you how insane you are.

Plus, it’s not like you actually killed these two, they’ll just get reborn someday. Also, they won’t be able to destroy half your shit.

#3: Go to Rushu and give him access to the World of Twelve.

Now that you got rid of Adamaï and Grougal, go straight to the Shushu dimension and talk to the King, Rushu, in order to make a deal with him so he’ll be able to fuck shit up in the World of Twelve. (I know you’ve already done that, gorgeous but you didn’t do the first two steps).

Also, specifically tell Rushu to help him kill Phaerys. A baby dragon like Adamaï, even while being possessed by Anathar, wouldn’t do the trick. Besides, you already killed Adamaï so there’s no need for Anathar anyways.

#4: Separate Phaerys and Yugo.

Once Rushu accepts the deal, prepare the portal that will make him, and the rest of his shushus, able to go to the World of Twelve. Once everything is into motion and you guys are finally out of the Shushu dimension, you should immediately make Rushu fight Phaerys. He may be old and filled with experience but Rushu’s the demon king. The chances of him winning against Phaerys are high. Once Phaerys notices Rushu, he’ll expectedly throw Yugo to the side so they ‘could meet later’ when in reality Rushu would’ve been done with him. As soon as you’re alone, go straight for the Crimson Claws Island to search for your Dofus. Don’t waste time talking to Yugo just yet. You don’t owe Yugo anything, make him go to you instead.

#5: Get your backup Dofus and then kill Balthazar and the eliatrope children.

As soon as you get your backup dofus, you should immediately go to Emrub. Get rid of Balthazar, he’s too old and frail to fight back anyways and besides he’ll just get reborn with Glip someday. After that, kill all them kids. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents??

You should get rid of everyone in Emrub. There’s no point in trying to convince them to go with you, they’re literally stuck in a timeless dimension so it literally felt like they just got here after seeing their parents die because of you.

I know you don’t want to be alone pookie but this is the only way 💖

To truly start anew you should eradicate everyone that knew what you did, like starting a new page in your life. Yugo can come last since it’ll feel very good to see the one who sealed you off balling his eyes out when he’ll learned you killed the whole race (and his brothers).

But you don’t have to worry baby cuz you’ll just restart the eliatrope race all over again. You know everything so you remember how it even all started in the first place. You just need to get all the Eliatrope Dofus back now.

#6: Get all the other Eliatrope Dofus.

Now that you got your backup Dofus, and killed all the other eliatropes, along with Balthazar, you should leave Emrub and go back to Crimson Claws island so you can immediately start searching for the other Eliatrope Dofus. You can’t leave without them after all.

With the Eliacube in hand, you can just scan where the dofus are in the world and teleport to them.

After you found them all, you can put them in the Zinit.

#7: NOW you can beat the shit out of Yugo.

It’s always best to do what you have to do first before having fun!

That’s why you’ll feel so good and liberated once you fight Yugo back on the island 🥰🥰

You can now tell him everything you did to their people and what you’re planning on doing now.

By that time, Phaerys should’ve gooten K.O’d by Rushu so that only leaves Yugo to finish off.

Yugo will be expectedly furious and outraged by all the events that took place while he was trying to find you which will only fuel your fun to annihilate him.

Yugo will die from your hands in rage and sorrow and you’ll finally be able to leave everything behind.

#8: Leave.

Now that you fused with the Eliacube, found your backup Dofus, went to Emrub to kill Balthazar and the eliatrope children, made Rushu kill Phaerys, found the remaining eliatrope Dofus, and killed Yugo after messing with his head a bit, you can finally leave the World of Twelve with the dofus and Eliacube together.

By leaving the World of Twelve, you’ll drain its wakfu essence and kill the whole planet along with its people. This will also make you note the death of Chibi, making this his shortest life he has ever had in the history of the Krosmoz.

Now that every twelvian is gone, and you have the Eliatrope Dofus and the Eliacube, all that’s left to do is join your sister Shinonome and get reborn along with your other siblings. The process would turn out exactly like your first ever life except that you will drill into your siblings, and all the eliatropes after that, that eliatropes were ALWAYS traveling the Krosmoz and that they’re all travellers by nature. Yugo and Adamaï would believe your lies since they’re adventurers at heart and would gladly help you show new planets and worlds, Chibi and Grougaloragran would use those materials from different worlds and planets to make new technology. Mina and Phaerys would always be fixing the eliatropes’ conflicts and anger, Nora and Efrim will unawarely be supporting your ideals by spreading the encouragement to be free and have fun, making the eliatropes believe that being travellers IS what is free and fun. And since Glip and Balthazar are teachers and the ones who educate the eliatropes about the eliatrope race, they will spread more of your beliefs onto them, spreading your views all throughout the eliatropes and the future generations to come.

THIS is how you get to them.

THIS is how you get your perfect ending.

Don’t hesitate, don’t keep talking to them, even if your sister keeps telling you to stop cuz you bet ur ass she also wants to get out of her damn egg. Cuz WHO in their right mind would want to stay in a freaking EGG for all eternity????

Anyways here’s my take on what Qilby should’ve done back in season 2. Pookie needed a little help so I gave him a list for next time 🥰🥰

[icejinlov3r]

ART CONTEST!!! - Frieza and Frost’s Fashion Show!!

So, I’m very much burnt out from writing (at least from my big stories, I’ll probably still drop occasional oneshots) and am taking a small hiatus. But turns hiatus can be a bit boring. So how am I gonna change that?

By hosting a random art contest for fun!!

I thought this might be a fun little thing to drop. No idea how many participants they’ll actually be, but we’ll see 😁😁.

So, here’s how it’ll work. The theme will be my two fav bois, Frieza and Frost. Specifically, with the two of them wearing cute outfits that you guys come up with! There will be a time limit of one week (meaning March 26th, 2024 is the due date). And when that day comes, I’ll share everyone’s drawings in giant post - make it a little “fashion show” for everyone to see! And then the next day, I’ll set up votes so YOU guys can vote on the winner!

I’m gonna have votes set up for different categories too, such as “cutest outfits” or “most unique outfits” that people can also vote on. But the main winner at the end will get to request a drawing from me - on any character, fandom, or ship they want!

There are gonna be a few rules, but really it’s more like a guideline on the contest:

You don’t have to draw ship art of Frieza and Frost together - just a simple piece with these two wearing an outfit of your choice will suffice, or even two separate pics of each individual character will work (that said, ship art is welcome too).

They don’t have to wear matching outfits, have them wear whatever you come up with.

You are not limited just because both characters are male - you can dress them up in either male or female outfits, but they both only require ONE outfit each.

If you want to dress them up in outfits from a crossover show (for example, dress Frieza up as Alastor from Hazbin Hotel, etc) you can absolutely do that.

You can have Frieza and Frost be in any form you want - obviously most people recognize their final forms, but I’d be delighted to see them in their first forms, or Frieza in Golden Form.

Art can be digital or on paper, you’re free to choose.

You don’t have to follow me to participate - everyone is welcome!

Okay, now for the ACTUAL rules: please keep your outfits and drawings PG-13. I don’t know how many minors actually follow me, or look at my content, but I wanna make this available to everyone.

Leave some sort of signature on your art. I know most artists do anyway, but I don’t want anyone’s art to get stolen.

No AI art. I shouldn’t have to explain why.

And finally, please show good sportsmanship. No matter what category someone wins, or who wins the contest at the end, the point of this is just to have fun and show the creativity of many artists! If I catch word any any artists harassing me or other artists for any reason related to the contest, your art will immediately be disqualified. No if, ands, or buts. Be respectful.

Okay, I think that covers everything, but if I need to, I’ll update this later. Like I said, you have one week to submit your art. You can either DM it to me in my private messaging, or send it in my inbox - just don’t do it anonymously, otherwise giving proper credit to your art will be much more difficult. In any case, good luck, and I can’t wait to see your guy’s art!

@anonymous-harpy @bluberryboom @justme068 @purrfectcellz @gojiberry-bbq @airplaneear2 @amiz06-certified-b1mb0

(These are just great artists I’m tagging to see if they’re interested 😊)

[natsuki208]

jeanmarco meet at a party high as shit and lay on the roof together and stare at the stars and feel a little less alone in the world

Thank you for the request, friend :) I’ll try.

Warning! Includes drugs and its effects on people.

———

What a funky night it is for Jean Kirstein. Everything during tonight’s party is dripping with fun and excitement, from the blaring music remixes to the bright neon colors everywhere, so much chaos for the eyes and ears but he doesn’t care.

He thinks everyone is enjoying it as much as he is, they’re all wiggling about and flapping their arms too but their also staring straight at him. Maybe ‘cause he’s just so f***ing awesome, that’s why.

After yet another shout out to the guys at the pool, Jean finds himself bumping into someone, someone whom is very familiar indeed: Dark hair, brown-ish eyes and little spots in his face that resemble freckles all catch his attention. Jean’s goofy smile gets the boy’s attention too.

‘Jean…’

He hears something, it sounds like his own name but it wasn’t clear. It sounds cool though so he just giggles back.

“Yup… that’s me!”

The image of the boy in front doesn’t look too happy, but how can he? His name is so stylish as sh*t so who can get turned off about that?

The voice gets a bit louder.

‘Jean!..’

Whoever this familiar guy is, he definitely does not approve of his coolness. Jean keeps on going, trying to be lively enough to win this dude over but it isn’t appearing to be working. Suddenly, out of the blue, all the neons fade away and his vision goes all black - ending his boasting with a loud thud.

….

Jean wakes up only to find himself lying on someone’s bed, his head supported by a pillow and a wet cloth on his forehead. He gazes over at the figure at his side, only to recognise his defeated, freckled face immediately.

“M-Marco?”

“Oh, about time you woke up.” He has both relief and disappointment in his tone.

Woke up? Did he fell asleep? Jean doesn’t really remember. What he does no that whatever happened to him or something he did made Marco very upset - he can tell from the obvious furrowed eyebrows.

“What happened? I did something stupid, didn’t I?” His shoulders sag out of guilt and worry.

Marco sighed. “Yes, you did. But it was my fault for not getting here on time to stop you.”

Now Jean feels concerned, for both his friend and his own actions that made him look idiotic. “What? What did I do?”

“Mmm… let’s just say it’ll be the last time you’ll ever give in to Floch’s peer pressure to trying marijuana. That’s for sure.”

Now that brings back one memory, before he lost himself, and he’s irritated about it. “Oh yeah.” He growls to himself.

Still feeling bad about taking that offer from f***ing Floch of all people and upsetting Marco whom recently arrived late, he desperately wants to make it up to him. So he looks over at the bottle of cider on the desk, which he already knows Marco brought that with him, and smiles hesitatingly.

“Say…” he pauses while struggling to sit up. “Do you think… you wanna go somewhere more quiet from all the racket going on in the rooms?”

The signal he subtly gave Marco to the bottle is enough to bring back that cute smile of his. “Yeah. I’d like that.”

And so the two teenage boys manage to get through the crowded corridors and find a ladder reaching for the rooftop, one helping the other because of still-present headache. Up there is where they’ll stay until the party downstairs quiets down, but for now they’ll drink the less alcoholic beverage, stare up into the starry night sky and just enjoy each other’s company.

Every so often, Jean gazes over at his friend’s joyous face and smile of his, and every time it made him smile much more. He doesn’t know what it is but Marco’s nature to quickly turn from anger back to his genuine sweetness on a dime is something for him to admire, you could say it’s pretty attractive… in another way.

He stares into those sparkly brown eyes of his until Marco realises his staring, asks what’s wrong which forces Jean to admit the truth in a very subtle version.

“Marco…” he starts. “W-When I’m with you… I feel… less alone in the world. Y-You know what I mean?”

A hint of surprise prints on Marco’s face, maybe it was a little bit much to say it like that, until the freckled boy shifts a little closer to Jean. Both boys are now side to side lying on the rooftop, their shoulders slightly touching and turning over to look into their eyes. This signifies the answer and Jean feels happy once again.

“I feel the same, Jean.” He replies sweetly before falling asleep. “I really do.”

[cyberthestarmedic]

Rescue bots x male reader who’s a bot…

Can I pleaaasee ask for a Medic/paramedic rescue bot x Heatwave. Where the two guys have major problems with one another, constant arguing like an old married couple when they denied that they’ll never be that close. I wanna take inspiration from the baby bot episode… since Kade got the baby for a week, I imagine him asking for help with Heatwave and kinda left him with the baby. That just got the two bots to put aside their differences and end up taking it in a deeper way 😭 LMAAAO LIKE

“You’re gonna leave me? Your son?!”

“he’s not our actual baby!”

Heatwave X Medic Reader

Hi! Love this request! Enjoyed writing it and I find it a bit funny as I’m actually a student paramedic myself!

I am going to call the reader ‘Patch’ by the way as it seems like a fitting name!

….

Babbles and Bickers

“Kade don’t leave the baby here!” “You look after him! I’ve got a date! Thanks! Bye!” He shouted taking off down the street as Heatwave groaned holding the babbling baby who didn’t who any better.

Heatwave sighed looking about for who could possibly know what to do with this baby…Patch.

He’d been away the last week at Team Prime’s base for some extra medical training from Ratchet while they had the commotion with this robo baby.

Patch was more a paramedic than medic as his training was much more generalised for a bit of everything and wasn’t specifically for just the army — he had a civil qualification that’s why he had a different title.

besides the point Patch looked too peaceful…a bit of a wind up was over due. Heatwave cracked a smile as he’d tapped the mech’s shoulder.

“Yes Heatwave?” “You’re good with babies right?” “Yes why?” He huffed turning round just to have a small robot baby placed into his servos.

“Heatwave where did this come from?!” He panicked as the firebot only laughed as Patch huffed.

“I mean like seriously this is an odd sparkling-“ “it’s not a sparkling! Kade left me to care for a robot baby! I had no choice in it as he ran off for a date or something!” Heatwave exclaimed as Patch sighed.

“Is this the same baby Cody was telling me about?” “Yeah” “and you’re suddenly incapable of holding him when I finish off important paperwork?” Patch huffed as the mech sighed and took the baby back.

“How long are you going to be?” “Well you missing me already?” Patch teased as Heatwave grumbled “sure. You finished yet?” “Give me half an hour, it’ll be done and I need this time to make sure everything is up to date” he chuckled as Heatwave walked off trying to think what to do.

Heatwave paced as the baby started to cry and he’d barely gotten a break from rescues today already.

He’d rocked the baby as he seen Patch appear a bit more sympathetic this time as he held the yellow dummy (British word for pacifier).

“You were finished your paperwork, I realised it was more like a baby than I originally thought it was and I found it in this care bag that was left in the garage” Patch explained.

”Look I don’t have the right mindset for doing this myself, mind helping?” “It’s no fuss Heatwave, besides I wouldn’t leave our son” he chuckled as Heatwave huffed.

“he isn’t our actual son” “he is for afternoon! Best start thinking it!” Patch chirped as Heatwave shook his head but if this is how he got help he’d play along.

the trio played rolling the ball about. Watched Cartoons, played ‘hide and seek’ where whoever had the baby always found the other making them win.

Heatwave and Patch sat down as the baby napped, it was just them in the bunker so it was peaceful and quiet.

“okay I’ll have to go finished the paper work” Patch said getting up and stretching as he was leaving Heatwave called after him.

“Hey don’t leave me alone with our son!” “I thought you said he wasn’t!” Patch groaned walking back over as the mech smiled.

“Oh and I did miss you. It made for a long week with my favourite mech to wind up and maybe even see” he chuckled as Patch huffed rolling his optics but smiling as he sat back down flicking on a tv show as the baby slept.

…

Sorry for it being so short! But I hope you enjoyed it!

Cyber 😊

[flyingwargle]

iizuna is on the couch, ankle wrapped in a brace, supported by a stack of pillows, rapidly cooling bag of dry ice underneath. his eyes are closed, focused on his mother typing in the next room over. she opted to work from home, mostly to kick him out of a depressive spiral, occasionally to help him. he has crutches though, so he isn’t entirely helpless, but sometimes shouting for her is easier.

it’s almost noon, which means the final match of the spring tournament is about to start. were it not for his injury, he and his team would likely be there, standing on the podium for the last time. he hates how this is how he’ll be remembered, as the unfortunate captain who lost his footing at the wrong time. he groans at himself, which immediately summons his mother to his side.

“you need something to do. did you finish your homework?”

“i’m injured,” he grumbles. “give me a break.”

“your scholarship will be rescinded if you skip your homework.”

“the offer’s already been finalized. it’s too late to withdraw.”

“not unless i have something to do with it.”

he snorts. “you’d really call them just to tell them that i skipped out on homework?”

“don’t underestimate me,” she retorts. he’s about to respond when the doorbell rings, feeling his mother touch his shoulder on her way to the door. “you should watch the final match. isn’t the second tokyo representative playing? cheer them on.”

“my teammates can do that.” their coach allowed them to return home after they were eliminated, although many chose to stay and watch. “they’re strong, anyway. they’ll probably win.” bokuto managed to eliminate kiryuu, after all. if fukurodani doesn’t win, it’ll be the upset of the entire tournament.

iizuna opens his eyes to search for the tv remote, hearing his mother greet whoever is at the door. he freezes when she calls out to him. ���tsukasa, your teammates are here!”

who would bother to visit when they already saw him at the hospital? he twists around with a strained smile, which quickly turns into a confused frown. “what are you guys doing here?”

“hi, captain!” komori chirps, smiling behind sakusa, who still has his mask on. “we thought you’d want some company to watch the finals together!”

“isn’t that nice? they came all the way here to see you.” his mother joins them, her smile wide at his underclassmen. “i’ll get some snacks and drinks. if you need anything, i’ll be in my office, so tell me who wins in the end.”

“you bet! thanks for having us!” komori bows, along with sakusa.

iizuna stares, speechless, flinching when his mother smacks his shoulder. “do you need more ice?” she asks.

“i’ll be fine. where’s the remote?”

she retrieves it from the coffee table and tosses it to him, gently removing the ice pack from under his ankle. as she saunters to the kitchen, he turns to the cousins and say, “take a seat. sakusa, please take your mask off. mom is just as obsessed with cleaning as you are.”

sakusa obliges, but chooses to sit furthest from him, komori taking the middle. iizuna turns the tv on, unsurprised that the broadcast started already. fukurodani is warming up, ichibayashi off to the side. his mother drops off snacks, ruffling his hair again before leaving. “i didn’t expect you two to come,” iizuna says.

“we don’t want our captain to be alone,” komori says. “our teammates said the stadium is a madhouse, anyway.” iizuna isn’t surprised. fukurodani is a powerhouse with a fearsome cheer squad, who probably amassed more supporters for today.

“is your ankle better?” sakusa asks.

iizuna shrugs. “still the same. i’ll be lucky to walk during my graduation ceremony.”

“will you keep playing after high school?”

“of course. just because i’m going to university first doesn’t mean i won’t go pro afterwards.”

“why not?” komori inquires. “that’s want i plan to do.”

the camera shows the stadium, packed with spectators and defeated athletes. “i always wanted to study physics,” iizuna says. “i figured having a safety net after volleyball is valuable.”

“that’s what i think, too,” sakusa says quietly. “motoya thinks it’s a waste.”

“why think about retirement when we aren’t even pro yet?” komori teases. his lighthearted tone fades, eyes on the tv. the two teams are bowing to each other. “i wish we could play together longer, iizuna-san.”

“now you make it sound like you’re dying.”

“you know what i mean!”

iizuna chuckles. “i know. i wish the same. sakusa, whoever your setter is, i hope they know how damn lucky they are to have you.” he will never forget the cousins’ first day of practice, how he was awed by their skill, sakusa’s especially. seeing him spike was nothing short of satisfying.

“i would gladly have you as my setter again,” sakusa says, “if we play on the same team.”

“one day, for sure.” iizuna settles deeper into the couch, feels the resentment at the pit of his stomach slowly recede. “one day.”

bokuto is bright on the orange court, fists in the air, grin wide. his teammates mask their anxiety with similar expressions, likely shouting challenges and declarations of victory. they haven’t reached the finals for years, as itachiyama always claimed one side of the court. iizuna is glad that it’s bokuto who can stand there in his place.

although the frustration of his defeat will never fade, he feels serene, watching the serve fly across the court, received by the libero, and then the setter tossing it to left. bokuto jumps, an owl with its wings spread open, landing the sharpest straight that iizuna has seen. although the broadcast doesn’t show it, iizuna can hear the crowd roar, evident by bokuto’s own cheer, his teammates crowding around him.

perhaps one day, he’ll toss to bokuto, as well. perhaps one day, they’ll all reconnect on the volleyball court, pulled from different corners of the nation, tethered together by their love for the sport, for competition, for working together to achieve victory.

[phanfictioncatalogue]

2011!Phan (2) Masterlist

part one

Bad Day (ao3) - ahappyphil

Summary: What happens when Dan and Phil are both in need of support

Call Me Beep Me (ao3) - ahappyphil

Summary: Phil gets a new phone

Cruel Summer (ao3) - ahappyphil 

Summary: “They’ll make jokes and it’ll be fine and he won’t look over at Phil and Dan with a white hot rage because they flaunt everything he wants but can’t have.”

Italy, 2011

Crush the Modem and Crush on the Tech (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: Dan feels like a failed millennial by the time his internet has been out for four hours and nothing he has tried seems to be working. A fic about technology and tampering.

CTRL+ALT+DELETE (ao3) - ahappyphil

Summary: It stings. Of course it stings to erase a part of their history. But it hurts worse when the same words he said out of safety and comfort are thrown back in his face with the sole purpose of mocking him. Mocking them.

Dimples (ao3) - JudeAraya

Summary: A snapshot moment in Italy, 2011

Exchange For (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: Dan had splashed out enough to buy some construction paper, glitter pens, and stickers at Poundland to make Phil’s birthday present. A ficlet about time and value.

familiar faces (ao3) - possumdnp

Summary: Phil recognizes the delivery guy from... somewhere. And Dan is incredibly amused by it.

(Or, a fic inspired by the story in their Stereo show where Phil recognized their Tesco delivery guy from an adult film)

Let's Be Friends (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: Phil has missed the bus back to his flat by only a few minutes and he’s just exhausted enough to take an Uber. But he’s also still skint, so an Uber pool is a fine compromise. A fic about meet cutes and cramped spaces.

Moving Day (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: Little looks into the many different times Phil Lester has moved house. A fic about boxes and change.

New Places (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: Florida is a different warmth than other places Dani has been. Different from India or Morocco. Different even from warm places she’s been with Phoebe— Jamacia and Portugal and California— though Phoebe is the reason she’s in Florida at all. A ficlet about hickeys and holidays.

On My Way (ao3) - JudeAraya

Summary: Someone else is out there, looking at the stars too.

Piggy Back Rides (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: “You know the last time I did this, I ended up in a cast, right?” Phil laughs. A ficlet about playing and winning.

Surprised Kiss (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: Phil has eaten, he’s showered, he’s clacking away on his keyboard— either editing or answering emails or scrolling through social media, but it’s more than Dan’s done. A ficlet about requests and workloads.

The Art of Progress (ao3) - iihappydaysii

Summary: In 2011, YouTube experiences an unfortunate malfunction and Dan and Phil make a choice. A year later, the consequences of that choice begin to reveal themselves…

The Knight of Wands (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: “Robot Death Machine” was filmed while Phil was at uni and the part of Dan’s brain that likes to look for patterns because the universe can be a little beautifully random like that thinks it’s neat that he’s watching it in his own shitty uni bedroom. He’s busy thinking that Phil should wear that coat more often because he looks sexy as fuck in black when Phil pulls out a deck of tarot cards. A fic about fate and compromise.

[sapphire-weapon]

real talk i’m actually terrified of how capcom is going to end the personal storylines for the legacy characters, because like

most media with a long-standing cast ends by pairing them up??? and GOD do i not want that.

like chris/jill is a given and that’s fine and absolutely no one would be shocked if they did that, and honestly they should’ve just pulled the trigger on it years ago, but like.

resident evil has switched hands through so many different dev teams over the years, and it feels like every single different team has had a different approach towards leon and ada, which is why their relationship is such a huge fucking mess, like.

i remember when degeneration was first coming out and people were bummed that leon was going to be in it but not ada, and the director’s response to fans re: ada was “she can’t be in everything.”

so then damnation and RE6 hit and they both went WAY WAY WAY OVER THE TOP with their relationship and then got HUGE backlash for what it did to leon’s character, so capcom just went back to fucking ignoring ada all together.

vendetta, infinite darkness, and death island just... straight up don’t even acknowledge her. she’s absent from them completely, the same way that she was in degeneration.

and then RE2make and RE4make happened, and the team working on those games completely reshaped what their relationship looked like and made it more realistic, which will make it much easier to write out a progression for it that makes sense

but because it’s realistic, it’s 100% incompatible with how OG canon has played out, so they can’t really use it as a baseline for ending their story officially in the OG timeline and like

god what a fucking mess. if they make leon/ada the endgame, people will be pissed. if they don’t make leon/ada the endgame, people will be pissed. there’s no winning. but this is a mess of their own making for tailoring their relationship solely around fan response from installment to installment, instead of just like. writing a fucking story. honestly they should just let leon die a hero’s death and be done with it. it’s what he really wants, anyway.

jk they’ll kill off ada long before they kill off leon because leon is the moneymaker they can keep in their back pocket for cameos.

and then what do you do with claire and rebecca? do you bring back billy at the zero hour so that rebecca can run away with him? and capcom can be like, hey late 40s rebecca, remember that guy whose dick you thought about sucking when you was 18? yeah he’s your endgame after 30 years of radio silence enjoooyyyyy!!!

DO YOU KNOW HOW PISSED I’D BE IF THE GUY WHOSE DICK I WANTED TO SUCK AT 18 JUST SHOWED BACK UP AND THE UNIVERSE DECIDED WE WERE GOING TO GET MARRIED well i guess it depends how well that dick has aged, i haven’t seen him since i was 20

and claire has never had a single prospective romance go well for her. so, again, they’d just have to introduce someone at the zero hour and go with it.

what they SHOULD do is just put claire and rebecca together, but they won’t.

but you know

i’m no cleon fan but

i would actually laugh REALLY FUCKING HARD if capcom went full scorched earth and killed off ada and then paired up leon and claire, because holy shit. holy shit that would take balls bigger than yoshinori kitase’s, and y’all saw what he did with FF7 remake and how huge his balls had to be to do that.

like, i’m not into the ship, but i would become into the ship if they did that.

and that’s not at all a slight against ada. i like ada. i like ada more than most people who hate aeon do. but i always respect any creator that commits to a massive subversive rug-pull that is guaranteed to piss off the vast majority of their fanbase just because it’s their story and they’re going to do what they want with it regardless of how it’ll be received. like. end of evangelion is among the highest art for me. i love that shit, man.

anyway.

tl;dr i don’t envy the position capcom is in, but at the same time, it’s their own fault for fucking around for so long without committing to any one single idea for three of the five of their main fucking characters.

[kim-poce]

6. No God In Town: Barbecue

On Patreon (two weeks earlier release)

First | Previous | Next | Masterlist

I work like a clock. quite literally dare I say. I can always tell what time it is if I try, and if I decide to wake up at any given time I’ll. Every day I woke up at eight o’clock, never later, never earlier, it was a habit so natural I didn’t even have to think about it anymore, so I was more than surprised when I opened my eyes at 7:42:23. It was wrong, it was completely the wrong time to be awake.

“Shhhh. You’ll wake them up,” a faint voice came from the outside of my room followed by the sound of metal against metal, pots and pans most likely. Humans are noise creatures, so they often make noise with objects too. “I just told you to be quiet.”

For half a second I was scared, I was back to the time I had no privacy, no personal space, nothing of my own, for a terrifying second I was nothing and I was god all over again. What brought me back was the clapping cub, I could recognize his rhythmic clapping at any time, that one specifically he does during meal time. Yes, I recalled, I called the cubs here. I had allowed them to sleep there, and I even said I was going to get them some meat.

Why did I do that? I shouldn’t have brought them, I shouldn’t allow humans this close to me. They may be innocent now, but they will grow up to be sharper and greedy in no time, they’ll want more than I’m willing to give. It was dangerous, humans are too dangerous and if I get too close I’ll be the only one hurt. But…

But I couldn’t simply throw the cubs out this early in the morning. It’s not like they will stay long enough to grow up, they said they would get more mint plants, it’s a couple days at most. So it’s better to keep them close. For now.

I realized then that I was faced with a new, unprecedented, problem; I had exactly thirteen minutes until the proper time to get up, and I didn’t know what to do until then. Should I try to go back to sleep? 

As if answering me, more pans fell to the ground and the cursing cub shouted words I’m not familiar with.

Should I just lay here until the proper time? It felt wrong to get up already, but I was already wrong to be awake so I didn’t know how much worse the feeling would be if I left the room.

“Are you really planning on setting the cabin on fire?!” the mint cub asked outside the room, “Fern, you don’t know how this works!”

“I know I can make fire with it,” the cursing cub answered.

“Yeah, we all know,” the flower cub said, “Because you almost set the cabin on fire already.”

“Shut the fuck up, Alice!”

“Put this damn thing down, Fern, if Biggie sees it they will think we want to burn the place with them inside.”

“Do you think Biggie can be burnt? They aren’t human,” the clapping cub asked, snapping his fingers as he sometimes does while asking something.

“The cabin isn’t human either, Diego, but if Fern doesn’t let go of this damn thing it’ll be burnt down,” the mint cub whisper-shouted.

“Shut up, Dani!”

Maybe, I realized, getting up is the safest thing to do.

So I did. The cubs had stopped verbally fighting and were now physically fighting. From what I could hear it was all against the cursing cub, who as I expected, was winning.

“Let go of it, are you planning on cremating me?”

It was the second day of the week so I picked a light blue robe.

“Can you guys fight far away from the wooden wall?!”

“All the walls are made out of wood. What do you want us to do?”

“Maybe, do not fight?! Just a thought?!”

I rolled my dices to pick the belt as I usually do, although I love routine, it’s good to let some things to fate. Light green belt with silver leaf pattern was it.

“PUT IT OFF. PUT IT OFF. WHERE IS THE FUCKING WATER?!”

“Oh? Now you ask?”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP ALICE.”

For my hair, I picked the hairpin with a drop-shaped fake emerald on it, it went well with the belt, I admit I was a bit undecided between this one and the silver lace, yes it had no drawn pattern but the simple silver color, and the possibility to tie it up however I wanted weighted on its favor. Not enough; the fake emerald matched better with the light green belt.

“Why doesn’t this place have water?”

“Just step on it, step on it, step on it. Everything will be fine.”

“Say the one who is frozen in place!”

Now my hair. Should I make a simple hairstyle or a braided detail? Simple style. Braided details. Simple style. Braided detail. Hmmm.

“Do you think Biggie will be very mad?”

“I know I would.”

“Shut up. It’s your fault!”

“What if it was expensive? What if it was rare? What if Biggie gets mad? I could go on errands for the rest of my life and still don’t get enough money to pay back.”

“Biggie will live way longer than us, so maybe our children’s children’s children will finish paying up.”

“Shut up Fern!” three voices said at once.

I stepped out of my room to face four frozen-in-place cubs. The pans in the kitchen had all fallen down, in truth, the pots and pans shelf was on the floor too, I could see that the ropes which had held this shelf for the last half a year had been burnt. The wall behind it was dark, and so were another two walls. When my eyes fell on the cursing cub she realized she was still holding the magic too I use to make fire, her hand flinched and the metal tool fell on the burned carpet of the living room.

“I-I, w-we, I mean, we-” I had never seen the flower cub lose her words like this. She is the voice of the group, like the priest- No. “S-sorry. We’ll p-pay.”

My anger will always be read as God’s wrath, so I did my best to leave what humans read as angry expressions out of my face. The cubs didn’t break anything I couldn’t fix, I wasn’t that angry. They wouldn’t believe it so easily though. Humans seem to have an issue with interpreting direct words.

“Good morning,” I tried. I learned painfully that the best way to make humans not read me as angry is to act as if nothing happened. Saying I don’t care means that I know what they did, means that they did something worth noting. If I act as if I saw nothing they will think I don’t care enough about the dented pans and tanned walls. They will think there is nothing to worry about. “You are up earlier than I expected.”

“f-f-food,” the flower cub said. “W-we were, I mean, sorry we- and- and-”

I know I shouldn’t have done that, but the power flew out of me before I could really think about it. The fear on the cub’s face diminished, not vanished. Someone once told me it was wrong to change a human's emotions without their consent. Such advice never stopped me from doing it, but it made me create the habit of only decreasing a bad emotion instead of getting rid of it.

“You don’t need to tell me what happened,” I said. The ‘act as if nothing happened’ plan wouldn’t work this time, but I still didn’t want them to think they should fear me, or explain themselves to me. Also, the situation was pretty clear by their previous talk and the state my cabin was in. “I understood it already, I’m not angry.”

My anger is God's wrath so I’m not angry.

“We’ll clean it,” the cursing cub said with a bow. I had never seen her as submissive as then. “I’m sorry.”

I didn’t like it. I didn’t like it. I didn’t want the cubs to fear me, I didn’t want them to bow like a follower, to put my belongings over their own life, to look at me with such scared eyes, to flinch when I tried to step close. To- Stop. Stop thinking, stop thinking, don’t get agitated, don’t get agitated. My anger is God's wrath so don’t get agitated.

“Okay,” I said, glancing down at the fire tool. “It is easy to use once you learn,” Changing the subject was usually a good idea. I measured the possibilities, asking a cub to fetch the tool was going to make them scared, getting to fetch closer and fetching the tool myself was going to make them scared, and bringing the tool closer with magic was going to get them scared. So let’s leave the tool for now. “It is a gift from long ago.”

“S-sorry,” the flower cub whispered.

“No need to be. It isn’t broken or anything. This is not something human cubs are able to break,” I said, although the state of my cabin begged to differ. “I’ll teach you how to use it so it won’t happen anymore, it doesn’t need to be now, though, I can go hunt the meat I promised later and we can—” I glanced at the messy kitchen “—sort the broken pots apart from the not broken pots. Would that be okay?”

The cubs nodded. I had increased the magic so they were almost completely calm now.

“And don’t try to set anything on fire until I teach you how to use that tool.”

“Y-yes, sorry.”

For a short while the children were still frozen, most like the young children back them. The ones that learned to fear me from birth. By the time we finished with the pots and pans they were still stiff. That was okay. Humans can overcome anything, they’ll be fine as long as I give them some time. I hoped I didn’t make any expressions that would make me look angry. If these cubs were the followers they would have knelt already if it was these annoying humans who break into my cabin from time to time they would be shouting some nonsense. But this group of cubs was fine, it wasn’t the first time I scared them, they were so wary of me at first, but they got over it easily. So we were almost done cleaning and I went out to hunt some meat, I was sure I would be back to a home where I wouldn’t be feared.

I was right. But I didn’t know I would be so right. It wasn’t my power I was sure, they were still acting guilty about nearly burning down my place but that was it. I only decreased their fear of me, I didn’t increase their boldness, that’s completely on them.

“Fern stop!” the clapping cup yelled as the cursing cub ran after him with the working fire tool. “Alice tell her to stop.”

“Fern, please.”

“I’m older than you Alice, you don’t get to order me around. Also, Biggie said it is set not to burn this time.”

“What kind of fire doesn’t burn?” the mint cub asked, he had asked it several times already.

“It usually burns but I set this one as a sort of fake fire so the cursing cub can learn how to use it safely,” I explained again.

“Diego doesn’t seem to believe you, though,” the mint cub shrugged, “How did you say I do this again?”

“You have to turn cut meat like this,” I showed. The mint cub was unusually interested in the fresh meat. The flower cub had to force him to stop begging me to take him hunting. “So it’ll be softer after cooking..”

“I don’t usually have fresh meat so I don’t know,” the mint cub said, concentrating on the cooking task while the other cub was yelling around. “And what is this plant’s name?”

“I have no idea I just found it around here.”

“How do you know it is safe to eat?”

“I just know things like this.” Keeping humans alive was once my purpose on earth.

“FERN STOP I’M BEGGING YOU!” the clapping cub’s voice could be heard from far away, he was running out of breath.

“It’s called Xanthosoma sagittifolium,” the flower cub explained, “It’s really common around here, I didn’t know we could eat it. Do you know any other edible plants around here?”

“Yes. I know several tasty ones, and more several ones if you don’t care about the taste.”

“Tell me please!” Her eyes light up.

“You’ll teach me how to keep my plants alive so that’s a given,” I said. “This one here for exemple-”

“HELP ME!”

“Stop it, Diego, the fire is fake,” the cursing cub said.

“BUT GET IT AWAY FROM ME!”

“So we can eat this?”

“Yes, but this one is really bitter.”

“Did I cut it right, Biggie?”

“Yes. Not I’ll show you how to season it.”

—

@extemporary-username, @the-magpiesystem, @nexfox-art, @kathea, @wolfeyedwitch, @blu-jay-2779, @rose-pinkie, @latenightcupsofcoffee

[aajjks]

TPOL!JK

you sit down and watch the footage he shows you and your heart drops when you see a man that looks like jungkook kissing a girl with those matching red stilettos and you can’t even bring yourself to watch the footage anymore. “you’re a liar!!” you yell before rushing out of the office with a face full of tears and jungkook is confused because he has NEVER had another woman except you inside of his office.

ji-eun phones jungkook to inform him of an upcoming charity event he was invited to but when she sees you running past with a face full of tears, she can’t help but smirk. her plan was actually working and she continues to play the innocent “personal assistant” when she’s secretly plotting on the downfall of the both of you. even if she doesn’t win jungkook over, if she can’t have him then you sure as hell don’t deserve him.

he’s too good for you, too high maintenance for you and he deserves someone of his stature and not some nobody whose head is too far into the clouds and is probably a gold digger. she’s just looking out for him…she really is.

you board the elevator and before jungkook can catch up to you, the door closes and you just cry inside the elevator by yourself. you feel so embarrassed because what if his coworkers knew the whole time and watched their boss just rotate between the two of you as he pleased? you never took jungkook for that kind of guy but after that, you’ll never take him back again. EVER.

once the elevator door is open, you wipe your tears and the receptionist bids you a goodbye as she watches you walk away. a few minutes later, jungkook hops off the elevator and jogs up to you to convince you that it really wasn’t him. how could he cheat on you? and if he was cheating, he wouldn’t be that obvious about it.

when you think about it, it all did seem too easy and jungkook isn’t stupid enough to just get caught like that. “i think someone is trying to break us up on purpose” you think out loud while sniffling a little.

“they’ll probably be at that charity thing ji-eun was talking about! i want to go so i can see them and give them a piece of my mind. NO ONE MESSES WITH MY MAN AND GETS AWAY WITH IT”

He doesn’t think twice before Pulling you in for a tight hug.

He is so glad that you’ve understood, he was so close to losing you again and you have no idea just how scared he was when he saw you run away from him. “Oh my Princess you scared me so much.. I thought I had lost you once again..”

He finally calms down when he feels your heartbeat, “don’t worry yn we will find out together who did this.” he bites his tongue as he thinks about the person that had the audacity to try and sabotage your relationship. “ I’ll make sure that they’re ruined.” he whispers in your ear and caress your hair as you cry.

“why would you think that I would ever date anyone else or that I was cheating on you?! I’d rather die than do that to you- and I am such a jealous person, so why would I do some thing that would make you jealous? Trust me, you have no reason to be insecure or suspicious of me because I will never betray you like that…” he confesses, you’re both standing in the parking lot of his company, and he cannot bring himself to let go of you.

“ I have a plan so listen close princess… we’re gonna pretend like we broke up. Because if we want that person to come forward, this is the only way I think we can do that… Of course you can come to the charity gala.. but we have to pretend that that person has succeeded in breaking us up- and then I’ll see if someone tries to come to me and flirt or whatever… that will be our culprit.” He says.

And he is pretty sure that this is going to work.

“ and the best part is that is not even a private charity gala event. Anyone can come. so it’ll not be a problem for you and I to come separately.”

“yeah that’s right I’m your man and I’ll always be your man.”

[portaltothevoid]

For Whom the Bell Tolls - Chapter 29 - Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x OFC (Kat Ramsay), sequel to Foolin’

Summary: They finalize their plan of attack. We go inside everyone’s pre-battle anxieties. 

Warnings: anxious thoughts

Word count: 2.5k

Chapter song: Separate Ways (Worlds Apart) (Stranger Things remix) by Journey

Tag list: @munchabunch​ @madaboutmunson​ @earl-greater​

When the wick of the last homemade bomb was stuffed in its bottle, Steve looked up to see Nancy standing in front of him. “Nice improvement on the shotgun,” he commented with a smirk. 

“Nothing like a felony to ensure I won’t miss and avoid the end of the world,” she laughed.

“I doubt you’d miss even if you didn’t,” he smiled at her.

Her cheeks burned scarlet at the compliment. “Yeah, so, um, think we should round everyone up to figure this out?” she spluttered.

“Hey, guys!” Steve bellowed, getting the rest of the party’s attention. He motioned for them to join with a wave of his hand.

“Alright, so Lucas and Erica should go with Max to the Creel House,” Nancy said. “Dustin and Eddie will take care of the bats. Me, Steve, Robin, and Kat will go to the Creel house in the Upside Down.”

“No,” Kat refused. “I’m staying with Eddie and Dustin.”

“Kat, you’re our best shot at winning this thing,” Steve said.

“Right, which is why it won’t do any good if I go with you guys. Look, I can help them distract the bats and then from inside Eddie’s trailer, I can find Max and hide her. She already told me all about where she’ll be, so once I get there, we’ll be good. If he finds us, I’ll hold him off,” Kat said.

“Okay, but… don’t you need a sensory deprivation tank to do this?” questioned Dustin.

“I can do it if I have enough white noise. I’ve done it before. I had to go in someone’s mind to retrieve a code word for some spy op and they told me I had to do it without the tank. It was a test that I wasn’t supposed to pass, but I did,” she shrugged. “Then they brought in the demodog and that’s when they knew…”

“If you use your powers to immobilize him before–” Nancy started.

“He will immediately know I’m there and change course. If he killed me instead, can you even imagine how much more power he’d have, what that would do to the rift between worlds? This gives not just Max a fighting chance, but all of us,” Kat stressed.

“Are you sure you’re up to this though?” Lucas asked. “I mean, wouldn’t it be better just in case something happened to have the bomb squad watching over you while you do whatever you do?”

“It doesn’t matter who I have around me,” Kat rejected. “One tilt of his head can break your neck and you’re dead on the floor before your brain can even think of wanting to say ‘No, stop!’ If that asshole wants me dead, I will be.”

“Her nose didn’t even bleed when she talked to El,” Eddie remarked, very quickly trying to get off the subject of his love dying.

“Exactly. And I transferred memories to her from the Void too. Look, we don’t have time anymore. This is as ready as I’ll ever be – as any of us will ever be. And I’m not changing my mind. This is what we’re doing.”

“Yeah, she’s got a solid point, so… I guess it’s settled then,” Dustin said. “So, what do we do about the bats?”

“We have to get them away from the Creel house, but we need to get there before you guys do that,” Nancy said.

“What if… I mean, I dunno how it’ll work there, but, uh, what if I play my guitar?” Eddie suggested. “Set up my amp and shit. Could probably hear that shit for miles.”

“That… is brilliant!” Dustin exclaimed.

“I can set it up on the roof of the trailer and it should be enough,” he added.

“I have a set of drums in your closet. We set those up, we play, and as soon as we’re done I’ll go back through the gate and begin.”

“How the hell are you gonna have time to play drums and then go mind-diving?” Erica countered.

“Because I am so not missing out on the performance that’ll help save the world,” Kat said.

“And those bats hear us, they’ll be on us like flies on shit in less than five minutes. She’ll have time,” Eddie said.

“Okay so… we drop Team Max off at the Creel house. While they set up, we head to Eddie’s and through the gate we all board up the trailer. Lucas can signal to Erica, who can use a flashlight to signal to us in the Upside Down when Vecna has Max. As soon as that’s done, we’ll make our way to Vecna and wait until Eddie’s done playing. Eddie will start to play when Max is secure in the Creel house and Vecna’s found her. Kat will tell us she’s about to go find Max and that’s when we go into the house and blow that asshole to bits,” Nancy said, laying out their game plan.

“That sounds too easy,” Erica said nervously.

“Because it is,” Kat agreed.

“The one variable we can’t account for is Vecna. Sure, this most likely will catch him off guard, but we have no idea for how long. And it’s not like we have any back up plans. Our back up plan is to abort if shit goes south, so, yeah. We’ll either save the damn world or… or…” Robin rambled.

“We go out swinging,” Kat shrugged.

“Um, Kat, you’re awfully calm about this. How are you so calm?” Robin asked.

“I– I don’t know. I guess since the demodog attacks and knowing El is back and rediscovering some of my memories, I just… I remembered how much power I have. And I’ll stop at nothing to protect each and every one of you. I am so sick of this asshole getting his way and what he wants, because he went on a ‘boohoo life sucks and no one likes me so let me destroy everything’ kick. I’m done,” she said firmly, crossing her arms.

“So… that’s it. That’s our plan,” Steve said quietly. A hush fell over the group as they realized it was time. They had their battle strategy, so now the only thing to do was start it. “Alright, well, let’s, uh– Let’s pack up and get on the road.”

They did as Steve said, having nothing to actually pack, Kat pulled Max aside. “Listen, Max, I just want you to know how incredibly strong you are, okay? You’re one of the few who got away from him and lived to tell the tale. Hold on to that. Hold on to the fact that you have people who love you. Who will do whatever it takes to protect you. Vecna never had that. He doesn’t know what it’s like. Please, just promise me, you’re gonna fight like hell, okay?”

Max nodded as she shifted her weight, not sure what to do with the compliment from Kat. “Yeah. I will. I don’t… I don’t want to–”

“Don’t even say it. Because it’s not going to happen,” she said sternly as she pulled the girl in for a hug. Kat knew she kept to herself, but she couldn’t help it. This was unlike anything that they had ever faced before. Kat smiled as she felt a squeeze from Max. 

“Thank you. Thank you for everything. I– I’m sorry you have to…” she trailed off as her eyes welled with tears.

Kat shook her head. “You don’t have to be sorry for anything. Vecna is a power hungry monster. It’s his fault all of us are going through any of this. Or actually, maybe it’s that stupid lab for not– Doesn’t matter whose fault it is. You shouldn’t feel guilty for any of this. You’re so fucking strong, Max. You keep fighting. You haven’t stopped. And what you’re about to do? It’s brave as hell.”

“Alright,” she said, quickly wiping at the few tears that managed to escape. “You’re a little too good at this… pep talk thing you’re doing,” she laughed. 

“Yeah, but it’s true. I didn’t want you going through this not knowing that. And knowing that I believe in you one thousand percent,” Kat gave Max’s shoulder a squeeze as they turned to get on the RV. 

“Same goes for you, you know. You’re a total badass,” she said, turning and smiling up at Kat. 

“Takes one to know one,” she winked. 

“You guys ready?” Steve asked then as he held the door open for them.

“Nope,” Max said.

“I don’t think there’s any way to be ready, so… on that note, full steam ahead,” Kat said sarcastically. Steve let out a small laugh through his nose. He followed them and sat in the driver’s seat, bringing the Winnebago to life. 

Once the wheels were rolling, a tense quiet suffocated the ride. Steve and Nancy sat up front, watching the road ahead of them pensively. He would steal looks at Nancy. He still loved her. He could finally admit to himself. After the conversation he had with Eddie in the woods… He knew she still cared about him in some way. He could tell she wasn’t happy. Any chance he had to confess to her… something interrupted. It was gnawing at him like a starved dog on a bone. If by some miracle they made it all out of here alive, he would find the time, the perfect opportunity to tell her how he felt. 

Nancy’s stare, on the other hand, never wavered from the window beside her. She kept thinking about the vision Kat had shared with her. She had seen everything Vecna showed her as if she had been the one in the vision. Could they really alter that fate?

Guilt gnawed at her underneath all her apprehension. She thought of her boyfriend. While she missed him, she rejoiced getting to spend time with Steve. Though they had separated, she knew somewhere deep down, she still had feelings for him. She could see how much he had grown over the last couple of years. Regardless of her current situation, her long distance relationship had made her terribly unhappy. Being close to Steve again, fighting side by side with him again… It was almost enough to relight a spark she thought had died long ago.

Behind Steve, sat Erica. Her eyes kept flitting over to her brother. She vowed to herself to spend more time with him after this was all over.

Lucas sat across from Max. Both of them anxiously staring out the window. Max drowned out everything with Kate Bush blasting into her ears while Lucas kept sneaking glances at her. Anyone could see how much he cared for her and how this whole ordeal was breaking his heart seeing her go through this. She was trying to psyche herself up as much as possible. Kat’s words helped, but still feeling him in the back of her mind, always lurking, always waiting… She was fighting her own inner battle to keep her confidence from waning. 

Robin sat on the floor, her arms crossed. She was trying to keep her anxiety down. Her expression, solemn as she kept her gaze forward. Kat was sitting on the bench in the very back. She fixed her stare out the window. Terrified was an understatement. She could feel Vecna hiding beneath the shadows, just as Max could. She had a bad habit of never taking her own advice. This time, she knew she had to make an exception. Her memory became a rolodex of all her greatest achievements. The only goal was to remind herself that yes, she was powerful. Yes, she did have what it took to win. She had already done it once. What made this time any different? The fact that her loved one and friends were on the front lines with her? If anything that caused her to only want to fight harder. 

Even still, she had this sinking feeling, deep down, that no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t shake. It was the feeling that… not everyone would make it out alive. Could she avoid Vecna’s visions of the future from becoming true? The only thing she could do… The only thing any of them could do was try.

Next to her, Eddie kept nervously ringing his hands around his makeshift spear. No matter what, he was not going to run this time. He was through with running. Whatever it takes to keep Kat safe, he was going to do it. The duration of this ride was the time he would spend worrying about what was to come. He would worry about the fate of his girlfriend. As much as he believed in her, if anything… anything at all was to happen to her… That was something he didn’t think he could come back from. The same went for the boy sitting next to him. That boy had grown to be the little brother he never had and never knew he wanted. All of these kids were so bright, with so much ahead of them. There’s no way this could be the end of the road, right? He had to go to experience life outside with his partner by his side, fighting to make either his own name or his band’s name one that could be seen in every household. This was finally his year, afterall.

Dustin looked as if he was going to throw up at any second. Him and his friends had fought this before and won. They had Kat on their side now. El had her powers back. They had to stand a fighting chance. He kept wracking his brain for any other possible plans, scenarios, or ideas. But he came up empty every time. This was it. They were doing this. They were en route to fight the biggest battle of their lives. Despite his fears, his worries, he knew somehow, some way, they were going to make it out of this alive. Just as they always had. And he swore he would do whatever it took to clear Eddie and Kat’s names. Them of all people, did not deserve any of the slander the ignorant town of Hawkins kept throwing at them. Eddie had proved to him that being yourself was more important than anything else. Kat had shown him perseverance and what the power of friendship could do for someone. Every single person in that RV was a tried and true warrior in his eyes. Part of him felt foolish for being such an optimist, but he had to believe they would make it out of there. Alive. He just had to.

Too soon, the Winnebago slowed to a stop. “Alright,” Max said, inhaling sharply. “Let’s do this.” Erica got off first, followed by her brother. Max closed the door behind her. Together they stopped and stared at the foreboding Creel house where their fates and the fate of the world lied. They looked at each other and with a nod, they marched forward.

Kat couldn’t help herself, she pushed aside the curtain that hung in the rear window and watched as they stared up at the expansive house. Knock ‘em dead, kid, Kat thought to herself as the ruins of a monster’s childhood home faded from view.

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