#it doesn't mean i don't know how my dyscalculia etc. fuck up my artwork

[aikainkauna]

Just tried to go through a friend's blog because she reblogs tons of beautiful artwork, but the self-belittling, self-hating and self-sabotaging captions from the original artists just ruined the whole experience a half a dozen posts in.

Dear Tumblr artists: every time you shit on yourself in the caption, you slap the viewer in the face. All they see when scrolling down is beauty; they feel awed and feel pleasure.

And then you come in and scream, "FUCK YOU! You didn't! What a fucking stupid cunt you were to feel pleasure at this piece of shit. Fuck off, you shitstain."

When if you'd just keep that hate of yours to yourself and didn't smear it all over your artwork, people would never know. Imagine it. These thousands of people would only see you as someone talented, giving them a gift, making them feel something pleasurable. It's a crazy power, making people happy and giving them pleasure. It doesn't actually *matter* if you think you aren't somehow qualified to do that (funny, you still posted that pic on the Internet anyhow). These people could be completely oblivious to your misery--isn't that amazing? Yes, maybe that's being a con artist, but all great artists and performers believe they're bullshitting, sometimes.

It's only that they don't show it--they offer only the pure experience that's their art and that's *it.* The neuroses can be revealed by the tabloids later, but what matters is that people don't come to art to have their faces rubbed in someone's littleness and misery--they come to escape the misery of depression, traumas, whatnot; they are drawn to art that transcends it, is better than real life and its constant pain.

And you, you who could be the alchemist turning shit into gold and making people happy, insist on selfishly dragging people into your shit anyway. Yes, you are being selfish; monstrously selfish. Even if that self-deprecating caption is there exactly to deflect accusations of conceit, there to criticise you before someone else does it, it's still selfish as fuck. It's to give a starving person a warm, nourishing meal and then vomit all over it.

If you really want to not feel so shit about yourself as an artist and really do want to bring something beautiful or just meaningful out into the world, and if you really want to not be seen as selfish, do the most unselfish act of all: give people only the good parts of yourself, accentuate them, and don't ruin that little hope you've just given them. It's so fucking empowering! I promise. Give it a shot. Depression is a terrible beast and it's ok to feel like shit and talk about it, but there's a time and a place. And during a moment of someone's happiness (which your art, yes, your messy art where you fucked up that shadow there IS to a random person on the Internet) is not it.

I beg of you. End this fucked-up, medieval-religious game of pleasure given only with punishment, this tainting of beauty and pleasure and hope when those are the most precious things we have--art can be what keeps someone alive on the brink of an abyss, and they don't need you to scream at them to jump.

Because you can be more than that, even if you don't feel like it, and nobody will ever have to suffer. You have the keys to withholding the pain--you have the responsibility of withholding pain if you're a beauty-creator, even.

Don't beat up the people whose souls you've just fucking fed. For crying out loud.

Please tell me I’m not the only one on this website who, upon seeing a post with some great artwork, already turns her face aside and winces as she scrolls down in a kind of “Ouch, I can only look with one eye” way, bracing herself for the inevitable self-hating and/or giggly, flaily caption that’s massively dissonant with the really harmonious, beautiful and talented and *deep* artwork?

[Here’s an amazing composition of deep emerald and peacock greens in a gorgeous, dreamlike vision of the nightly forest and a dark fairy queen manifesting herself from within the shadows, holding a bleeding heart in her hands and wearing antlers and a garland of wilted flowers, showing deep insight into the subconscio–]

MY PRECUOUS CINNAMOM BB lol spammin ur dash with my trash oc’s ッ/*~~*~~*uwuッ

@taurocoprosexualsteve, @tardisimpalalockedslytherins, @midwestlesbianfarmergemstone

pls dont dlete my captions!!!

*^follow for more dark&wierd and womderful^*

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