#it also makes me sad bc my mom watches movies nd shows w her but whenever i ask she's just like yeah sure idk nd it never happens
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#yesterday i asked my mom if i could just watch tv and talk to her for a bit today#i was sick for two days and i always feel so lonely and get stuck in a nightmare feeling anxiety state#and she was like.. yeah sure for a bit#but today she's just talking to my sister#nd my sister is like.... yeah she's said that she finds me annoying when im in the living room#so she thinks she has right to do so but not me#and my mom wont say anything bc if im being honest i think she'd rather spend time w my sister instead of w me#so... idk im just alone in my room as always#i feel super anxious abt tmrw when school starts again. so anxious!!!#bc they've switched to a new building nd i have never been there#idk exactly where it is. or how the doors work (from google maps it looks like it's one of those doors w a code)#idk where the classroom is or what the classroom layout is or anything#im just super stressed nd i wanted to just talk to someone for a bit bc i feel so lonely#but no.... its evening now and my sister has been in the living room all day#it also makes me sad bc my mom watches movies nd shows w her but whenever i ask she's just like yeah sure idk nd it never happens#idk i just feel so alone :'(((((#but at the same time spending time w ppl nd hanging out gives me anxiety nd maybe im just meant to do everything on my own idk#idk anything i just feel so bad nd im so anxious nd i feel like im stuck in a nightmare all alone. idk wanna have class. esp not english...#i have to speak english w my teacher nd just speaking swedish is hard skksksksk#whatever idk i just gotta do things ig
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