#is bullshit bc I try overly fucking hard to be nice to everyone and he can't stop being a dick for five minutes and god. friends for five

[millidew]

random list of v3 opinions after experiencing all that again:

the death road of despair segment is the pre-trial highlight of ch1. so damn good. just a perfect microcosm of the game and kaede's flaws and conflicts

maki is funnier than i remember. but she’s at her funniest when she hits shuichi with a devastating insult, usually completely unprompted

ouma and maki parallels and foiling forever and ever. they HAAATE each other. but also it’d be cool to see them get along. the whole point is that they don’t see through the other and believe the other’s lies but still

maki saying she’ll work hard to make people trust her and her talent and that she wants to survive with everyone…ough…

ouma is so mad. he wishes that were him. also that moment where everyone ignores him and tries to comfort kaito after gonta's execution. he also wishes that were him but unfortunately he's been an asshole to everyone and no one likes him so

the only way i can enjoy saio/uma is one sided ouma->shuichi where shuichi is just not invested in the cop/robber dynamic ouma wants at all. it’s funnier this way + saimota inspires a visceral upset within him. he NEEDS to fumble both kaede and shuichi.

on that note i’ve been hcing ouma as bisexual for years partially out of spite

kaito’s obnoxious charm can’t be ignored. if you think you’ve successfully done it, it means it’s just entered an asymptomatic form. it'll hit you soon enough

ch2 pre-execution >>> KIRA BUCKLAND THE VOICE ACTRESS THAT YOU ARE. EVERYONE WONDERING IF THEY MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE BY VOTING FOR KIRUMI. KAITO GOING “IDC I WANT TO LIVE, OUR LIVES ARE IMPORTANT TOO!” KIRUMI INSULTING OUMA <3 EVERYONE CHEERING FOR KIRUMI TO RUN!!! TO LIVE!!!!!!!! GAHHHH SO COOL

kaito and himiko just blatantly lying through their teeth during their ftes. the liars who suppress their true problemsssss. also him shouting that he is NOT GIVING HER A PIGGY BACK RIDE!!! EVAR!!!!! is so funny

himiko I LOVE YOUUUUU. i love her getting overly familiar with people post-development and just accidentally completely overstepping boundaries by insulting kiibo and calling maki "maki roll." she's trying so hard you guys

KAITO IS SO FUCKING DRAMATIC. HE SHOULD’VE BEEN THE MALE LEAD IN A HIGH-SCHOOL THEATRE PRODUCTION AND ANNOYED EVERYONE IN THE CREW!!!! STOP BOTHERING MAKI SHE HAS A POWER DRILL

shuichi and maki doing sit ups and the camera slowly panning to show kaito laying there hands behind his head saying his usual bullshit is one of the funniest moments of the game

tenko and himiko agree that shuichi should transition into a woman. this is true.

I don’t accept tenko slander unless it’s specifically about her obsessiveness over himiko in ch1-2 in which case I can’t defend her

if kaito shaved he’d look 13. for this reason he is legally not allowed to do that.

tsumugi and the background of v3 are SO GOOD. ABSOLUTE PEAK. in execution there are lots of weak points but after thh, sdr2, udg, and the anime series, tell me a meta story about consumption, lies, and depression that ends with the cameos from entire main games’ previous casts doesn’t go hard

don’t deny that tsumugi loved her little ocs. do you not enjoy torturing your blorbos, putting them into situations, and giving them nice things just to take those away?? shipping them and dressing them up??? making silly aus (salmon mode, utdp, arguably dr:s)?

i just wish the writers utilized her more bc i love that so much. she should've wanted to get to get more involved with everyone (giddily see her ocs up close). she should've made even more thh/srdr2 references. players assume the writers are making for cheap nostalgia points, and they are, but it's true in-universe too...she should've been so overconfident that she'd get sloppy with the situational irony... tsumugi you little freak ily

she and rantaro were 100% s52's survivors and you can pry this from my cold dead hands. her dr fangirl self can be her pre-game personality

speaking of pre-game personalities, pre-game content is at best boring to me. how they write ouma is my litmus test. if he's not enough of a nuisance, just in a different way, then it's gotta go

maki is down for a training trio polycule, shuichi is in denial about everything and fears becoming an awkward third wheel, and kaito has been trying unsuccessfully to wink-wink nudge-nudge shuichi and maki into “realizing their feelings for each other” for ages

i still think maki should have short hair. initially I thought just shorter pigtails would be ok but I’m now in the firm camp of a pixie cut with one of her scrunchies on her wrist, with her orphanage-age flashback self maintaining the pigtails. she had to cut them off for practicality’s sake but one of her hidden desires is to be able to regrow it one day. another show of her loss of identity and past life, and how every aspect of her is controlled? such a simple desire at first glance but because hair is such a simple show of autonomy…even more tragic… maybe her doomed childhood friend yuri used to do her hair …hrm…

ultimates are public, influential figures. maki’s had to assassinate friends before (rip her yakuza friend that I didn’t know she had up until recently). maki went back to being an assassin in utdp after graduating. the hope’s peak class roster MIGHT just be a hit list

for someone who includes miu in her top 3 I haven’t talked about her at all huh. it’s been maki central up in here

miu is AWFUL but when her jokes hit, they hit good and hard just like she’d want them to. she’s completely insufferable and deserves to hit ouma (also insufferable) with 3000 hammers. kiibo too but he wouldn’t want to

look just because ouma said he was doing everything for a good reason, do NOT forget that at his core he is a little dipshit. he’s a JERK!!!

brief dip into maki time again. one of my favorite aus is that maki’s doomed childhood friend is actually miu. i'll expand on this in another post

once again: drv3 and rgu are shaking hands about exiting the narrative and the follies of playing hero. read my utenanthy!kaemugi post

v3 is FARRRR from a masterpiece, but it's a solid and fitting Ending to the main games, plus it's got an insane cast with infinite dynamics and a premise which i love to bits <33 and it was the game that got me into dr, so it'll always be special in my heart. also kaito momota luminary of the stars debuted in it which gives it 5/5 stars

[wizardnuke]

it's been like a terrible three weeks and I cried in front of my choir teacher today haha yeet

[bluest-uwu-blowfishes]

ok so hc that the scions have board game nights like, tataru will be like "y'all need to rest" and stuff and the scions want to spend time together bc found family and all that but they really shouldn't take a full-blown day off because the world could start imploding at literally any second, and also they're all giant nerds so like once or twice a moon they'll have a board game night they'd probably mostly play hidden role games or trivia i think, because they're giant nerds (and estinien just likes lying and fucking with them). anything where some people have some information and some people don't. basically almost anything that polygon has played on overboard.

~more under the cut (character specifics)~

ALPHINAUD obviously would be super strategic about everything and probably be fairly competent, but in games where you have to try to read other people and their motives he can kinda fall into galaxy-brain traps where it's not as complicated as he thinks. In games with a "bad guy" role (like in mafia) it's pretty easy to tell when he's one of the "bad guys" because it doesn't seem like he's as eager for information as normal. lil bit to competitive but it’s all in good fun ALISAE stumbles ass-first into gaslight alley (where alphinaud and esitinien are waiting for her). she generally doesn't want to think that hard about stuff because she already has to think under normal circumstances (well, what's normal for them) and this is supposed to be her break. it's not exactly difficult for her, she just doesn't feel like it. accidentally says stuff that makes her seem guilty when she's innocent, and the inverse is also true. will go for the most batshit strategies just to see if they work. it's called "science," alphinaud G’RAHA will get accused by doing literally nothing. just, sitting there. we all know he's bad at lying unless he's been perfecting his deception for literal decades, and even then it's only okay to good. it won't even be anything specific when he's the "bad guy," sometimes he seems too bummed out and someties he's too gleefully malicious, but it's painfully obvious and very poorly excecuted. over time he gets harder to read because he begins perfecting always just being "like that." probably figures out who the murderer is in Clue right as alphinaud's about to open the envelope. THE WARRIOR OF LIGHT is obviously going to be vaguer/varried, but i think that in general they would have an excellent poker face when they want to (*glances at ARR*). gives nobody any information at any point ever about anything, quietly puts together as many pieces as they can. switches wildly between not talking at all and talking a lot (yet still not give any info??) with no correlation between that and whose side they're on. in performative/roleplaying games they can deadpan almost anything URIANGER is just there for the drama. about to win? he will purposefully temporarily screw over his team just because. overly dramatic about everything. perfect for roleplaying games. actually really good at most games but almost never wins because he gets greedy trying to see how long he can lead them on with his bullshit, and someone (usually aphinaud) figures everything out and steals the win out from under him. THANCRED isn't typically a suspect for anything. nobody 100% trusts him, but no one outright thinks he's the imposter or whatever. he'll make some jokes and generally be fairly chill about the whole thing, and overall there's a 50/50 chance that anyone will call him out on his bluffs. will occassionaly go for the most batshit strategies that somehow always work when he tries them. has threatened to quit the scions when he feels betrayed. will start singing if it's even slightly appropriate Y’SHTOLA is too competent for all this. she has fun and will sometimes get involved, but she's mostly an observer. there's a solid 10% chance that someone will figure out she's the traitor/imposter/werewolf/etc. pretty good at bluffing and somehow simultaneously seems to never be on the bad guy team and also always be on the bad guy team. a true neutral ESTINIEN is pretty easy to read if you know what to look for. he seems to be smiling (smirking) more when he's the bad guy. it's because he knows that he'll win by screwing over everyone else, and that's fun. mostly observes (or seems to be observing) regardless of what role he has in a game, though if someone says something slightly stupid or suspicious he'll point it out very quickly without drawing too much attention to himself. KRILE joins when she can but isn't usually there or is usually happy to just watch, though she always makes a point to see how much she can mess with alphinaud specifically. she doesn't care about winning (although it's always nice), she just wants alphinaud to lose. TATARU mostly watches on the sidelines but also joins sometimes, and becomes actively malicious for the duration or the game. absolutely brutal. she won't win, but she sure as hell will betray each and every one of them at least once, and each in a slightly different way. honestly kinda impressive they would also sometimes play board games back on the First! RYNE is an actual deathtrap. "look, she's so sweet and innocent, she hasn't done anything to inflict suspicion upon herself <3" NO. she has, you just all ignored it. don't trust her. what are you doing. no stop. she's lying. oh god, they're all dead now. what did i tell you. she won't win most of the time, but she'll manage to royally screw over at least half of the crew. they all know this, yet keep falling for it. thancred's always the first victim. he never learns (might add more later)

[ahsbitch]

The Grey-Outpost!Michael Langdon x Reader

Word Count: 5143

Summary: So I got this message for my prompts and it was supposed to just be a blurb like the others but it was already getting way too long and then I realized it would fit really well with a oneshot idea I had a month or two ago sooo here we are

Warnings: so many, nsfw, smut, virginity loss, first time, first orgasm, actually first three lmao, fingering, choking, Mean!Michael, slapping, overstimulation, emotional manipulation, brief blowjob, unprotected sex, breeding kink, a little bit of corset kink, some cockwarming bc it’s me, very Sub!Reader, also overly nice reader which probably doesn’t need a warning but I’m putting it anyway, , mentions of violence, some waxing poetic bc again that’s just me, floor licking, some?underwear stuff? Idk man, did I mention swearing bc that’s here too, idk, that’s all I can think of but my brain is not entirely focused so if I missed something I’m sorry

A/N: I’m sorry I’m like this but I hope it’s okay. Comments are always appreciated! Even just in the tags of a reblog! Or a message! Or anything! Hearing your reactions makes me feel so good!

Mini Tag List: @wroteclassicaly​ @michaellangdonstanaccount​ @guiltyfiend​

@angelicmichael​

(i actually don’t remember if all of you asked to be tagged in stuff or not so if you didn’t i’m really sorry i just thought i’d put a few people, if you want me to...Not tag you in stuff that’s totally cool and i totally get it just let me know, if you do want me to tag you in stuff also let me know on that front) 

You confused Michael Langdon. 

It wasn’t intentional, he was sure, but he was not used to being confused by the behavior of humans.

You also annoyed him, although that was less surprising. 

Most people annoyed him. 

But you annoyed him for the same reason that you confused him, and that just made him all the more confused and annoyed and annoyed and confused. 

How the hell were you so nice? 

You treated everyone who crossed your path with such kindness, even though most of them treated you like you were dog shit on the bottom of their shoe. And you simply...smiled? Nodded? Did as they said, if they gave an order, or ignored them if it was just words. 

He had never even seen you complain about your servant status, never seen you look at the drab grey of your dress with even an ounce of disdain. 

He’d taken to reading your thoughts, even more than he did with the others, trying to find the cruelty hidden inside you. 

Once, one of the Purples whose name Michael hadn’t bothered to learn had walked into a ladder that you were standing on for some job or another, and you had fallen to the ground, landing hard on your back. The Purple had cursed at you for getting in his way, and you apologized instantly. 

What an asshole, You had thought, and Michael had started to get excited, but a moment later you had shaken your head at yourself, and your thoughts continued, No, Y/N, don’t be unfair. They live a different type of life here. It’s not his fault that he sees me like this at this point, he’s practically been indoctrinated.

What utter bullshit that was, and yet you’d seemed completely contented with that thought, climbing back onto the ladder to finish your task. 

Another time he had walked in on you being beaten while Venable watching, smirking. He had simply stared for a while, watching the way you took your blows. 

“What’s going on?” Michael had asked, blood boiling at Venable’s smug expression. 

“A reminder. She’s been a bit slow in her work lately. Distracted, I think, with your proposal of paradise. She needed to remember her place.” 

He had nodded, turning back to observe you, listening for your reaction to those words. 

I haven’t been slower, though. She’s just been angrier. Poor Ms. Venable, she must be scared. I wish she wouldn’t take it out on me, Your stream of thought had paused as you let out a cry of pain, But I hope that she’ll find some type of peace. 

In interviews, Michael had started to ask about you. 

“She’s nice,” Gallant had said rather dismissively, “That’s about it. Not memorable. I don’t think anyone would miss her.” 

“She helps everyone finish their work, even though she has her own,” Another Grey had said, tilting his head to the side in thought, “I saw her take a beating in Mallory’s place once for a broken lamp. I don’t think that’s the only time she’s done that, either. She’s a little too sweet, almost. It can’t be real, can it?”

That was Michael’s thought too, but you were that sweet, or so it seemed. 

He’d begun instructing everyone during their interviews to either completely ignore you or be cruel to you, to treat you with extra disdain, to not bother with respect. He’d told Purples and Greys alike, had watched out to see them following his orders. They were doing it, and you were slowly becoming more and more alone,and yet you never so much as thought anything cruel in return. From time to time, a nasty thought would pop into your head, but you always brushed it away almost instantly, scolding yourself into something overly forgiving of their behavior. Still, you were lonelier than ever, and that meant that it would be all the easier to draw you to him. 

Your interview was the last one that was scheduled, and with every moment that led up to it he found himself getting more and more ready to break you down, and every time he thought of that he found his cock getting harder and harder. 

He was going to ruin you, in more ways than one. 

And then the interview had started, you sitting in your chair with your hands folded neatly in your lap, steadfastly avoiding eye contact with him, a polite smile on your face, and something had snapped deep inside him. 

He wasn’t sure what did it. Maybe it was your answer to why you should be taken to the Sanctuary. 

“I don’t know that I should,” You’d said simply, your damned respectful smile never wavering, “I mean, it would be nice. But I’m not particularly special, right? And if the Sanctuary is meant to be people carrying on the human race, shouldn’t it be the people who are going to make the biggest difference? I know you said that what I thought i was weakness could be my saving, and I get that, I just don’t know if I have any particular weaknesses or any particular saving graces. If you need someone to wash floors or cook in the Sanctuary, then yeah, I’m pretty good at those things. You might want me. But I don’t know that I have any particular talents or powers that would make me more useful than anyone else.” 

Maybe it was what you had said when he’d asked about your anger, about whether or not you would get revenge on any of the others for the way they’d treated you, if you got the chance.

You shrugged, taking a few moments to think about your answer before you spoke, “No. I don’t blame them for it, not really. The world ended. The fact that any of us are alive is strange enough as it is. Them being cruel is probably more of a defense mechanism than anything else. I wish they wouldn’t use me for their anger, or their disdain, or their sadness, I kinda wish they’d just leave me alone sometimes, but I wouldn’t want to get revenge even if I got the chance. I don’t think they deserve to be treated badly, even if they’ve treated me badly.” 

But most likely, it had been your answer when he’d asked what exactly you were thinking about right in that moment. 

“The end of the world, Mr. Langdon, sir,” Your smile finally dropped for just a moment, your embarrassment evident, “And your eyes. They’re very beautiful. I was thinking that heaven probably isn’t real, but if it is, it probably looks something like your eyes. But of course it’s much more likely that hell is real, based on recent events, in which case it probably looks something like the world we live in right now.” 

Michael had stood, instructing you to do the same, and within moments his lips were on yours. 

Yes, he was going to ruin you in every way possible. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was so totally not how you had planned for your interview to go. 

Was it how Langdon had planned for it to go? Maybe. You wondered vacantly if this had happened with all of his other interviews, if all of them had found themselves lying on the floor, pinned underneath him, feeling him hungrily devouring their mouths in perhaps the best kiss that anyone had ever experienced. 

He trailed kisses down to your throat, hot, open mouthed, that you felt even though they were over the high collar of your dress, and he bit down hard, sucking harshly through the fabric. 

“Fuck!” You groaned out, feeling your skin go hot with embarrassment over the noises you were making. 

“Don’t hold back, pet,” He moved his mouth to your ear, kissing the spot just behind your earlobe as he murmured, “You make the most delightful little noises.” 

This served only to embarrass you more, and you chewed on the inside of your cheek to try and hide the moans that threatened to spill from you. 

Langdon’s hand made its way to your neck, squeezing at it as he pulled your head up closer to his, and you let out a pained whine at the pressure his palm put onto the sore spot he had just left on your throat, “Did you not hear me? Don’t hold back. I expect you to follow my orders. I’d think you’d be used to that by now.” 

“I’m sorry, sir,” You let out a strangled cry, and with a sharp smile he finally released you, letting your head drop back against the floor. 

“Next time you don’t listen to me, you will be,” He chuckled at your terrified expression, but after a moment he froze, raising a curious eyebrow at you, “What are you thinking about right now?” 

You weren’t naive enough to think that he actually cared about how you were feeling, but you answered anyway, scared of what may happen if you didn’t, “Honestly? I’m trying to decide if I’m more likely to be murdered by you or by Ms. Venable.” 

Langdon laughed again, moving off of you and leaning against the wall. He looked oddly comfortable like that, although you wouldn’t be surprised if his outfit cost more than the entire Outpost, and with a wolfish grin he patted his lap gently. 

You frowned, unsure of what that meant, but Langdon simply rolled his eyes and wrapped a hand around your wrist, tugging you into his lap. 

This was… odd.

After a moment, he gripped both of your wrists, raising your arms up and placing them on his shoulders, and you locked your fingers around the back of his neck, staring dumbly at him as you did so. 

His legs extended straight out, but he held you steady in his lap, arm wrapped your hips, your own legs perpendicular to his. 

This was very odd. 

“Now tell me,” It was interesting, the way Langdon’s words sounded more like a purr, “Why do you think that I would kill you?” 

Shyly you dropped your gaze, but then his hand was under your chin, lifting until you looked him in the eye, and you shrugged, “I mean… you said you would. It was like the first thing you told me when I came in. That if I lied or hedged or anything like that you’d...y’know...obliterate me.” 

“And have you lied to me?” His voice was sharp now, his eyes dangerous, although something playful still danced around the edges of his lips. 

“No!” You flinched, prepared for him to hit you even though he made no movement to do so, and after a minute, after you’d realized that no strike was coming, you blinked at him, “I, uh, no, sir. But you’re, well, forgive me for saying so, Mr. Langdon, but you’re very intimidating.” 

He was frowning now, just a little, and you probably wouldn’t have even noticed if you hadn’t been so fascinated by his mouth, “I’m glad you find me intimidating. I’d be a bit concerned for your sanity if you didn’t. But I have no plans at the moment to kill you, and as long as you keep telling me the truth like this, I doubt it’ll arise. Now, why would Venable kill you?” 

“She’s strict about her rules,” You felt your face heating up again, “No sexual contact of any kind. And we, y’know, we kissed. If she finds out, well, she’d even kill a Purple for breaking the rules so explicitly like that. She’d kill a Grey for a lot less.” 

“And we’ll be doing a lot more,” Langdon’s smooth voice echoed in your ears, and you shivered slightly at the insinuation, “Venable will not touch you.”

“Why not?” Your curiosity got the better of you, and you asked before you could think about the fact that it was probably a bad idea. 

Luckily, Langdon did nothing more than chuckle at you again, shifting slightly underneath you, “Because if anyone here is going to harm you, pet, it’s going to be me.” 

For some reason, his words made you clench your thighs, and you swallowed to avoid letting out a whine. 

“Yes sir,” You said softly, and then, when he’d started pressing kisses along your jaw, “There’s one more thing.” 

“And what would that be?” 

Clearing your throat, you fought to keep holding eye contact with him, “I don’t, I mean, I don’t want to be one of those people who fucks someone to get something. I don’t want to sleep with you just in hopes of going to the Sanctuary, especially because you could easily say you’re going to take me until after we’re done and then tell me you’ve changed your mind or something. I don’t want that. I’d rather you just... tell me the truth now.” 

“Alright,” Sighing, Langdon straightened up a little, shifting beneath you again so that you suddenly became aware of his erection pressing into you, “You’re not going to the Sanctuary, Y/N. Not even if we fuck. And we are going to fuck, you understand that, right?” 

“Yes sir,” You felt your gaze drop to his lips once more, “I understand. The Sanctuary thing and the fucking thing. May I please kiss you again?” 

“Not only may you do so, but I insist that you do,” His voice was cold now, but one look into his eyes showed you that he was pleased about this, and you frantically brought your mouth to his. 

Langdon slammed you back to the ground, and your head cracked loudly against the marble floor, making you feel a bit dizzy, and then his fingers found their way between the buttons of your dress and he pulled sharply, ripping it in half, and that made you feel even dizzier.

Holy fuck, how strong was he? 

“Lovely,” He murmured, his mouth running over your collarbones and up the curves of your neck, sucking dark bruises onto your skin as he went, “Don’t forget what I told you. I want to hear every single one of your sounds, understood?”

“Yes sir,” Your hands made their way to his hair almost of their own accord as he continued on, mouth drifting down to swirl over your covered nipples. 

“Turn around,” Langdon commanded, and he hummed his approval when you followed his instructions in merely a moment, kneeling before him but facing the wall. 

His long fingers made their way to the ties of your corset, beginning to work on the knot, and he frowned, “This is tied very tightly, pet. Doesn’t it hurt?” 

“I had Mallory tie it extra tightly for me, so I would have something to focus on other than my nerves for the interview,” You let out a hiss of relief as the corset came untied, “It wouldn’t hurt much, but you’re supposed to wear something under a corset, and Ms. Venable doesn’t give the Greys anything to wear under our corsets because she says our comfort isn’t a priority. So it kinda digs into my-ow, fuck, my skin.”

Your cry of distress had come when Langdon’s hands had pressed hard into the red marks that marred your back from your corset. 

“It really has done a number on you,” He helped you unclasp the front of your corset and slip it off, before bringing his hands to your hips, “Get on all fours.” 

You did as he said, unsure of why exactly he was asking you to do so, but you understood a moment later when the wet warmth of his tongue began to stroke along your spine. He licked along each mark that had been left behind, leaving a trail of coolness to follow, and although it stung with each moment of contact, it left some relief as he went. You mewled at the feeling, back arching towards him, desperate for more. 

“Feel better?” He purred, now drawing his nose around your spine.

“Yes,” You sighed pleasantly, “Thank-fuck!”

Langdon had shifted his arms so that one ran under your stomach, holding you in place, and with the other he brought his palm down on your back with all his strength. 

Tears were starting to spill from your eyes, leaving a puddle on the floor as he struck you four more times in quick, painful succession. 

“Aw, does it hurt, pet?” He was cooing at you, voice light and mocking, “Look at you. You’ve made a mess on my floor. Clean that up for me, yes?” 

Unsure of what that meant, you tried to look back at him to ask, but Langdon wrapped his hand around your neck and forced your head to the floor, his entire body pressed against yours, “Clean it up.” 

Hesitantly, you reached your tongue out to the floor, scooping the salty moisture up carefully. The pressure on your throat lightened up so that you could breathe more easily, but he didn’t remove his hand, and you frantically licked the rest of your tears off of the floor. 

Letting you sit up, he smirked at your shy smile, examining the floor carefully before praising you, “Wonderful job, pet. But it appears that the mess on the floor isn’t your only one. You seem to have made quite a mess down here as well.”

With that his hand cupped your pussy over your panties, which had become thoroughly soaked through. He pulled them down slowly, a rumble rolling past his lips at the sound the fabric made as it tried to cling to your damp flesh. He gave a tug and ripped them off of your thighs, bringing the shredded remains up to his face to examine it closely. Staring into your eyes, he poked his tongue out of his mouth and brought it to the fabric, laving slowly over the wetness that coated it. You moaned loudly at the sight, squeezing your thighs together. 

When Langdon was satisfied that he had gotten every drop of your essence off of the scraps of your underwear he tossed them carelessly in the direction of his desk, and then his tongue was on you once again, this time drawing painfully slow stripes from your knee up your inner thigh, ending just at your hip bone. 

“Did you like watching me?” There was amusement in his voice, a kind of mirth that could almost be mistaken for warmth, as he licked closer and closer to where you wanted him most, never deigning to touch you there, “Did it make you even more wet for me? Do you want me to eat your pretty little pussy until you can’t walk? Want me to let you drench my face?” 

“Please, yes, please!” You keened towards him and Langdon clamped his hands onto your thighs to hold you in place, bringing his thumbs down to spread your pussy lips open. There was something so intimately dirty about it that you let out another long moan, his breath fanning hot air against your folds, “Langdon, please, I’ll do anything you ask.”

He scoffed, nuzzling his nose over your entrance, “You’d do anything I asked anyway. But I will say, you have just about the sweetest pussy I’ve ever seen. And you smell divine, pet.” 

Whimpering, you tried to rut up to his mouth, wanting so badly to feel him against you, “Please, sir, Langdon, please, what do I have to do for you to touch me?” 

At those words, Langdon moved away from you completely, now not even letting his fingers drift over your skin, “Was I not touching you before? You’re incredibly ungrateful for someone who I could kill with less than the blink of an eye.” 

“I’m sorry,” You scrabbled to your knees, legs shaking, “I’m sorry, Mr. Langdon, I didn’t mean to be ungrateful. I’m so grateful to you, I am, I’m sorry.” 

“As you should be,” He sneered, but the bulge in his pants looked even larger than it had before, and the corners of his lips twitched up, “You do look very good on your knees for me. I think this is the position you’re meant to be in, the reason you were put on this earth. Why else would you look so lovely like this, look like such a pretty little slut? Open your mouth for me, pet.” 

This is happening. This is actually happening.

Eagerly, you complied, wrenching your mouth as wide open as you could, desperate to please him. Langdon unzipped his dress pants, reaching into his boxers and stroking himself, letting out a deep and rumbly groan as he finally pulled himself out. 

His cock was... beautiful? You hadn’t expected to find it so beautiful. The few dicks you had seen you had mostly found odd, fine enough but not particularly nice to look at, but Langdon’s looked like it had been carved by Michelangelo himself. 

It was also huge, as thick as your wrist and at least as long as your forearm, the tip a throbbing angry crimson. It was veiny, and you would’ve expected that to be strange but it just made it even prettier, an extra long and thick vein running up the side that oddly made your mouth water. 

A fresh wave of desire pulsed through you, but that didn’t stop your worry as he approached you, speaking your anxiety out loud, “Is that... I mean, is that going to fit?” 

Chuckling, Langdon pushed himself into your mouth with no warning, holding the back of your head with one hand as he began an intense, bruising pace, “What’s the matter, little whore? Never been with someone this big?”

That’s one way to put it. 

He froze suddenly, buried down your throat, his pelvic bone pressed against your nose, and slowly he looked down at you with a raised eyebrow, “Wait, you’re a virgin?”

You nodded slowly, and Langdon hissed at the movement, slowly pulling himself away from you, “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“You didn’t ask,” You shrugged, bringing a hand up to massage your jaw, “I didn’t think it would matter, I’m sorry. Does it change things?” 

Langdon gripped your hair, and he pulled you to your feet and into a bruising kiss all in one swift movement. Then his hands were all over you, stroking your skin fervently as he led you to his chair, sitting down and pulling you into his lap once more. The feeling of his dress pants against your bare skin was sinfully lovely, and you were suddenly aware of how exposed you were, when you could see almost nothing of him. 

After what felt like hours, he pulled away from you, his eyes dancing with something deeply dangerous, a brilliant smile on his face, “Of course it matters, pet I wouldn’t have even considered wasting any of my cum in your mouth if I knew your perfect cunt was untouched, waiting for me.” 

You let out a cry as he grabbed onto your hips tightly, beginning to draw you up and down over his length. His cock pressed into your folds, rubbing your clit, and every time he approached your entrance you gasped, “Holy, oh my, fuck, that feels good, Langdon I-”

“Michael,” He interrupted, moving you faster. 

“What?” You blinked up at him in confusion, and he felt his cock twitch at the sight.

“My name is Michael Langdon,” He pressed a kiss to your neck, beginning to suck a new line of hickeys, “You can call me Michael.” 

“Michael,” You sighed, clenching around nothing as a strange sensation started to boil in your stomach, something so pleasureful that you didn’t know what was happening, “Oh, fuck, Michael, you feel so good, please, can’t you just fuck me?” 

“Oh believe me, I’m going to,” His cock was twitching even more now, your name so perfect from his mouth, “But you have to be ready for it first. Come on, pet, come for me, just like this.” 

You mewled, your fingers digging into his shoulders as the boiling in your stomach became more, became overwhelming, and you squeezed your eyes shut as you let out a desperate shriek. 

“I didn’t, oh fuck, oh god, I didn’t know it would feel that good,” You panted, and Michael raised an eyebrow at you yet again as you buried your face in his shoulder. 

“Have you... have you never had an orgasm before?” 

You shook your head against him, letting out another gasp as one of his fingers started to toy around your entrance, “No, I haven’t. I mean, I thought I might have once, but it was nothing like that.”

“Have you ever had any fingers inside you?” He asked, even as he was already easing a finger into you, giving your walls a single stroke before he pushed two more in. 

“No!” You shrieked, the foreign sensation making you buck your hips wildly, “I, I mean, no, I haven’t.” 

Cock throbbing harder than ever before, Michael began to scissor his fingers around, stretching you out, “Fascinating. My little whore is so inexperienced.”

Moaning at his words, you lurched when his middle finger hit a spot deep inside you that made you see stars, “M-m-Michael, please!”

“M-m-Michael! M-m-Michael!” He mocked you, scooping the hand that wasn’t busy working you open under your ass, shifting out of the seat and lowering you to the ground, his mouth finding its way to your tits, “Wait, pet. Be a patient slut for me and you’ll be rewarded.” 

You nodded as he bit your nipple, toying with it roughly before kissing over to the other side, “Sorry, sorry, oh holy fuck that feels good.” 

Another orgasm was forming deep within you, more mewls leaving your throat as you desperately started to claw at his back, “Michael, fuck, Michael, I’m going to-”

“Good girl,” He purred, pulling his fingers out of you just as you started to cum, and then he slammed his cock into you with no warning, delighting in the bloodcurdling scream that you let out, letting out a guttural moan, “You’re so good for me, aren’t you? Desperate little slut, you were so ready for me to stretch you out, huh?”

“Wait, Michael,” You let out a sob, your cunt pulsing with overstimulation, “Michael, it’s too much, it hurts, please.” 

He was completely bottomed out in you, not moving yet, but he brought both hands up to wrap around your throat, cutting off all of your air, “Now now, pet, that’s no way to thank me for being so kind to you. You’ve cum twice now, haven’t you? And have I gotten to cum even once? No. Now, are you going to be good for me?” 

You nodded fervently, and he released you, leaving you gasping, “Sorry, sorry, Michael. I’m sorry.” 

“Good,” Michael started to pull out of you ever so slowly, moving at a glacial pace until just his tip was inside of you before thrusting in again, filling you up once more, “Oh, you feel good. Your pussy is fluttering all around me. But I should tell you, Y/N, I lied to you.” 

You let out another shaky sob as he hooked his hands under your knees and stretched your legs up, throwing them over his shoulders, continuing his pace of slow drags out followed by impossibly fast thrusts in, your hands scrambling for purchase on the smooth silk that covered his back, “Wh-what? What do you mean?” 

“I told you I wasn’t going to take you to the Sanctuary,” He grunted, his pace getting somehow even slower, in and out both, your slapping skin making loud, lewd noises, “I lied. I am. I’m going to pump you full of my cum, pet, until you’re overflowing with me. I’m going to breed you like the whore you are, and then we’re going to rule over the new world, together.” 

“I don’t understand,” Shrieking again, a whine bubbling out of your throat, you gasped as his hands moved to your tits once more, “Please, Michael, please can you go faster?”

It still hurt, but it was getting better, the pain being overrun with the pleasure. 

Michael complied, slamming into you, setting such a brutal, bruising pace that you were sure you could feel him all the way up in your stomach, “That’s my good little pet. Look at this, your pussy is devouring me. I’m going to wreck you, gonna mold your pussy around my dick so that you know that no one else will ever be able to make you feel good. Your perfect little pussy was made for me, and me alone. You were made for me. Your pussy, your ass, your mouth, these perfect tits,” He gave your breasts a harsh squeeze, running his thumbs over your nipples as you let out another scream, “They’re gonna be full of milk before you know it, filled up for our baby. Do you want to have my baby, pet? Do you want me to breed you? Fill you up? Ruin you for anyone else with my cock?” 

“Yes!” You sobbed, although you were barely conscious of what you were saying, barely even conscious of what he was saying, another orgasm fast approaching, “Michael, please! Fill me up! I need you!”

“Then cum for me,” Growling, he brought his nose down to touch yours, “Squeeze my cock with that tight pussy of yours, finish for me, and accept my seed knowing that you belong to me now, understood?” 

“Yes, yes, yes! Michael, I’m yours, I belong to you, yes!” Your screams were echoing around the room now, but you couldn’t hold back, not when he felt so good, and this time rather than a boiling in your stomach your orgasm felt like an awakening, like you were being reborn. 

You came harder than you knew was possible and Michael quickly followed suit, pumping you full of his thick, hot ropes of cum, more than he had ever cum before, filling you all the way up. 

Whimpering, you sat up, and rather than letting you move away Michael pulled you to his lap and dragged himself to the wall to lean against once again, hushing your mewls with a kiss, “Good girl. That’s my good little pet. I’m gonna stay inside you, okay? Gotta make sure you don’t lose a single drop.”

Nodding, you felt your eyelids start to flutter, your head dropping to his chest, “Yes, Michael. I’m...I’m so tired.”

“I know you are, little one, I know you are. Get some rest now. No one will interrupt us. Rest, my sweet, and have dreams of the future we will build together,” He pressed a kiss to your forehead, pulling you impossibly closer to his chest, and letting out a happy hum as he felt you already drifting off, and before he did the same he whispered in your ear, “I’m proud of you.”

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

okay so. i probably shouldn’t talk about this considering that i have never experienced it myself.... but whenever i see a story about some hollywood star relapsing into their addiction of/maybe overdosing on whatever drug, there’s always a difference between how people react when it’s a female star (say demi lovato overdosing back in 2018 after a few years of sobriety) and a male star (most currently dax shepard relapsing after 16 years of sobriety).

for example, back in 2018 when demi overdosed on heroin, there was a whole stream of people on the buzzfeed articles, alt press articles and even just the normal news stories about it commenting things like: “demi’s just an attention-seeking bitch like she’s always been. she wanted to be in the headlines and that’s what she got. SHE NEEDS TO CONTROL HER ADDICTION of being an attention whore for the press and also her drug addiction, obviously. but shame on her for relapsing!!!! how lazy is she??? she is NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH!” or there were also streams of “i have absolutely NO SYMPATHY for this spoilt brat girl doing this for media attention! snooze button on a slow news day. she needs to learn to control herself! the world doesn’t revolve around you and your drug addiction, honey. go back to therapy to get your head out of your ass!” type comments on every article about demi. like woohoo for you, brenda or coleman. here’s your “stupid fucking asshole of the day” award 🥇.

whereas with dax sheppard in the last week (and ok i just read an upworthy article about it on fb just now bc i’m bored) and everyone’s like: “oh how BRAVE of dax for speaking out about his relapsing into his addiction!!!! the poor man! fame must be hard with lockdown!!! what a good hearted man, addiction is hard in general anyway! good for him for speaking out again, i don’t have much else to say.” and the like. in other words, all i’ve read in response to dax’s relapse into his prescription drug addiction is is an outpouring of support. although, then again, it’s probably because i’ve only read one article on it.... or maybe i did read another stream of comments the other day..... but i can’t remember them.

but my point is: why the fuck is the backlash so virulently derogatory and hurtful when it’s a woman relapsing into their addiction or overdosing???? whereas when it’s a dude, everyone’s all chill and supportive and calling him brave for admitting that he’s relapsing???? like if another female celeb said something similar during this time, they’d be hit with the stuff that demi received when overdosing two years ago.

okay yeah, obvs there were people supporting demi back in 2018 saying things like the fake comment i wrote for dax, saying things such as: “addiction is a cycle that’s hard to kick and leave behind. i’ve been there, and most of us will be at some point in our life. but i’d never wish it on anyone. that’s the one thing no one understands about addiction: that relapse can happen for most people. my heart goes out to demi!” or the like. but mostly it was the virulent bullshit attacking her for being weak and being an attention whore and not allowing her any empathy or sympathy bc “shame! shame! shame on her for breaking! how weak she is 🙄! where IS HER self-restraint as a YOUNG W O M A N?? this is why young women don’t know how to control themselves these days!” as if demi, as a young woman in hollywood, is responsible for teaching young girls and women to control themselves. like shut the fuck up doris/henry. that’s YOUR goddamned fucking job as parents/was your job as parents. it is no ones fault but your own if your parenting methods are/were defective enough that you think people solely rely on tv stars to raise kids (much like barney stinson in himym thinking that bob barker from the price is right was his dad growing up). the raising of someone’s child is not some young celeb’s fucking job, unless it’s THEIR OWN FRICKIN KID. for fuck’s sake.

whereas everyone seems supportive and understanding of dax’s admission of relapse and sending him “love and strength is this dire time 😊!” and other overly nice stuff and saying stuff about hai family going through this time as well. all like “oh his family must be struggling to but that’s okay because he’s open about his struggle with everyone! so BRAVE!” etc etc etc. there is no mention so far of him having to “control himself”. or maybe i haven’t read far enough. not that i will, considering i read like one celeb story a month at the very least, so as to not overload myself on bitterness like i did back in my teens with constant access to the E! news/celeb channel.

all i’m saying is that people need to have more sympathy and empathy towards people who struggle with addiction and relapsing, regardless of wether they’re male or female (or obvs trans and non-binary etc as well). like obvs this is coming from someone who has never experienced it herself/themself, but that doesn’t mean that i show no sympathy or empathy for their struggle. and i also so say this regardless of their background, no matter whether they’re rich stars or the poor drug addict on the street.

because i easily could become an alcoholic or whatever else, myself, at any point of my life.... because life can throw any fucking thing at you and out of nowhere..... then suddenly you’re using drugs or alcohol to cope. then you develop an addiction over many years. obviously this is more endemic in hollywood, considering that you can get your hands on literally everything and anything..... if you know the right people etc. and it’s also why i ended up ditching my idea of wanting to be a hollywood star when i was older, back when i was 16. because even when you can have the worlds best therapists and drug rehab facilities at your service/disposal as a hollywood star, that doesn’t exclude you from struggling with drug addiction and relapse or needing sympathy/empathy and support. it’s easy as fuck to fall back into your addiction when you’re unfortunately surrounded by it in hollywood on a frequent basis anyway.

anyway yeah. here’s another rant for october; on a topic i probably shouldn’t rant on lmao.

[iphoenixrising]

IDK if you ever got my message or if i just missed the reply (if so, sorry!) but im the anon who had the idea for irresistible omega Tim au and I was thinking about how Tim’s first meeting w Jason goes after he’s resurrected ... complete au where Jason’s kinda just stops as soon as he smells Tim (bc the Pit enhanced his senses?) and is like “ah gotta protect him” OR where they do like a half fight sort of thing and in the middle of it Jason smells that he’s an omega and has a guilty breakdown

Hi babe. I did get your asks. They are sitting in my inbox for when I have time, I promise does appeal to me, and if I remember correctly, this is an au where Tim doesn’t hide the fact he’s an Omega from the Batfamily. Like, everyone knows.

I headcanon this au as one where Tim doesn’t really think anyone is seriously interested in him, like he’s totally oblivious to it in an adorable kind of way. Like, half the JLA is fucking in love with him, but are terrified of B and what he might do to them that they do stupid things like make sure he’s hydrated and leave little gifts in his room in the Watchtower. Superman makes pass overs when B is out of town and Robin!Tim was in charge of seeing to Gotham. 

Just so many examples of this, and so Tim just thinks the JLA is super nice and welcoming and because he’s Batman’s partner they totally dig him as a crime fighter. 

He’s just so clueless about it.

Dick is just overly-clingy to everyone (which is a little true, but he’s desperate when it comes to clinging to Tim). 

He’s the only human on the Titan’s so of course they’re all more protective than normal. 

Even the Suicide Squad doesn’t like to see him get too roughed up. 

But when Jay meets him the first time without the helmet (and let’s mess with it a bit, babe) let’s say it’s after he broken in the Tower and tried slitting Tim’s throat. Let’s just say he had his helmet on for most of the initial meeting.

So the one time Jay’s closer to the Bats than he’s ever been, shortly after he’d joined the Outlaws and started working with a team again–

he gets a hint of that scent.

Maybe Robin had had a hard night and the blockers wore off early. Maybe he’d just been overworked and tired that he’d gotten a suit without them properly working. 

But a combination hits his brain in a rush of Alpha pheromones and slight horror at what damaged he’s caused ta this kid, yeah? Maybe because he feels guilty as fuck, the need to protect just gets that much more of a priority. 

Now that he ain’t outta the Pit and whatever bullshit brainwashing Talia did, he can try to start over with this tentative, guarded Omega, and sets out to do just that.

[cherrymoonvol6]

i binge watched all of skam españa s1 yesterday for the first time (cause i didn't really care about any of the remakes until the skam in my first language went for a wlw season, which FUCK YEAH) so here are a couple (or more) thoughts about it:

inés was... uf. a straight up savage. like i really saw how much she hated eva.

i love that the stairs became a regular, particular location for eva and jorge. it really felt unique for them and made their relationship stand out for me in the remakes.

i thought this too while watching s2 but the boy squad interactions feel SO genuine. i really felt like watching my own classmates talking, like they got everything about teenager boys' interactions down. and yay the whole group doesn't look like a bunch of instagram models together! probably my fave thing about skames

i LOVE all the changes they did. the only remake i saw beside this was skam france, which felt like the original in almost every way except that the original was superior in literally everything. watching it was almost like a recap of og s1 but ten times worst. but skam españa had a lot of interesting and good changes that had me legitimately wondering what could happen next

i was really sold on noreva for this season. like nora really proves to be a great friend!!! i dislike that every noreva interaction after the cristian scandal was like... eva self-pitying and saying no one likes her and nora being like :/ and comforting her in every way possible, like i don't remember that og eva was so annoying when the shit hit the fan??? but besides of that nora and evas friendship felt really nice and genuine

viri really got on my nerves this season despite not being overly hateful towards amira. i don't think she earned her place in the girl squad but i hope they prove me wrong lmao

i like that the girls really feel like the losers of the school. because they don't look like supermodels. and i saw eva's no makeup face with acne at times which made me so happy??? bc it's not often we get teenagers without super clear skin, which is bullshit. so that was cute!

but speaking about that... idk how i feel about cris being casted with this girl who resembles no physical characteristics to the og chris aside being white. og chris was pretty much a one dimensional character whose only purpose was to react exactly like the other ones and throw a shallow phrase there and there, and in that sense this cris felt much more fleshed out, which i like. but especially knowing cris is the host of s2, it makes me feel like they didn't want to flesh out a fat, non-conventionally attractive character in a wlw season and instead went for an actress who's easily the prettiest one in the bunch. thinking we could've gotten a much more physically relatable character for such an important season for me makes me feel sad and frustrated. not to give irene shit cause she has the acting range! but yeah. not really a fan of that.

my fav change was perhaps how they handled the penetrators sweater thing. cause every remake feels like they make a similar version of the sweater without never really explaining what are the penetrators about, but skames handled it really well? like the herpes thing is gross af but it also felt funny lmao. and the vaginal herpes thing means they skipped the "i think im pregnant" drama which i LOVE cause i hated that part lmao.

i don't really connect with amira at all cause... me and religion are not the best partners yikes. but like... everyone gave amira so much shit for her religion all the time. like i physically cringed at some moments bc the girls were too hard on her. having watched s2 i think it's a nice buildup to her season, tho. like amira was way more sweeter than what she should've been imo!

connecting with any eva besides og eva is... so hard to me? i can't help but see her like a secondary character everywhere. eva in this season had a bit to it and i especially felt it bc they were trying to develop the others' relationship as well (viri and alejandro, nora and alejandro, cris and hugo, etc). the actress (idk her name rip) is really good as well, she really conveyed that eva feeling super great and her emotions felt really raw and real

my impressions of alejandro ranked from thinking he's a kinda decent fuckboy, to being genuinely surprised at him apologizing at viri by himself, to absolutely hating him when he said he won't take a no for answer. and fuck eva for laughing at that, too. that shit ain't cute and that's my main problem with noorhelm. but anyways, with alejandro moving on with inés on s2 i felt like that bit was changed so. so maybe i won't hate that bitch as much in the nora season, who knows. (also i read a couple people saying this alejandro is the most handsome william and i agree, like i really could fall for this bitch for a couple of minutes)

it's sad that lucas and viri were the weakest actors in the season, particularly bc i liked what they did with lucas, having him realize he's gay before meeting spanish!even and come out to his friends on his own. like lucas' actor has two facial expressions on this season and viri is just.... ugh. also lucas coming out now probably means he'll find his even as a background character in other season, which is cool bc i don't think lucas' actor will have the acting range to host an entire season by himself

and??? those are it??? i liked it way more than i thought i would. i have my complaints but i think they handled a couple things better than the og and from start to finish it felt very different to what the og did while keeping the important bits. so... 7/10! good.

[lameunknown]

so i watched tlj

i’m just gonna ramble in long bullet points bc aint no way i’m forming coherent thoughts right now. spoilers ahead, duh. 

one of my fav parts about the experience was how the movie theater was packed full of people just as crazy and excited about this as me & alex. we literally either held hands or hugged tight during the entire movie bc i don’t think we’d survive otherwise lmao. get you a friend who’s not afraid to show support through physical contact. also it was 8 pm so there weren’t that many kids. people clapped several times and when kylo & rey blew up luke’s lightsaber someone yelled “FUCK” super loudly and everyone else agreed

speaking about kylo and rey.....yeah lucasfilm....this is what we’re not gonna do. it scares me SO. MUCH. that even as an avid anti r*ylo i couldn’t help seeing it, and i’m TERRIFIED of ep 9 for that exact reason. the hand touching was disgusting. like all these moments would’ve been absolutely precious if only there was a way to see them as purely platonic, but after these two long years there sadly is not. i really wanted them to work together as PLATONIC PARTNERS and possibly later FRIENDS but i guess not. :( also i hated her parentage so much? like i hope he was just lying to her bc they HAVE to be related. i refuse to believe they aren’t. and if they aren’t, rey better be obi wan’s or qui gonn’s or pure force spawn or some shit, foh with that scavenger bullshit. 

speaking of kylo! these segways are really working out great so far. yeah my boy dumb as shit. like every time i think he can’t possibly do anything stupider he goes and fuckin does it. i guess that’s what the mix of skywalker tomfoolery, solo stupidity and the fact that a powerful dark entity has been fucking your head up since your early childhood does to you, but i honestly can’t with him jesus. supreme leader??? deceiving & YELLING at rey? really kyle??? go to your fucking room boy you got some serious nerve behaving like this after seemingly making all that progress. at least he looked amazing (that cloak moment at the end? come thru!) and i loved that he wasn’t wearing his mask and cloak most of the movie. i love his resting sad puppy face and his gorgeous fridge body. don’t come for me

we talked about kylo so naturally it’s time to talk about hux. can we please take a moment to thank the writers for making fanon hux canon in the best possible way? and in the first five fucking minutes of the movie, too? i was so happy i couldn’t believe my eyes OR ears. seriously, it almost feels as if they went through all of our best fics and fanarts ( @kyleauxwren ‘s ICONIC wine mom hux comes to mind) and decided to just give the gays what they want, and it was a. ma. zing. and what a wonderful surprise it was bc they didn’t give him even a second in the trailer but in the movie we got T O N S of perfectly written, sassy, undereye circles, fed up with all this shit hux. i’m in love. would’ve preferred him slightly more rugged, with some stubble and possibly sipping from a flask, but that’s just me getting cocky. 

you already know. i fucken hate kylux. we didn’t get as much direct face-to-face communication and sadly no catchphrase to top “careful, ren”, but i thoroughly enjoyed the little moments in which they (mostly hux) tried to cooperate? like ngl it was mostly hux trying to make the best out of the situation he’d find himself in and negotiate with kyle and then kyle would just lash out and start banging him around and tbh i felt kinda sorry for him, but i guess that’s life when your boyfriend is an unhinged nearly all-powerful manchild. part of me still hopes kylo calms down at least a little bit and starts appreciating/respecting hux for putting up with so much of his shit (again.......supreme leader is dead long live the supreme leader???? the only thing you are is supreme idiot you stinky) lmao. but that’s irrelevant to the actual canon so imma stop. i gotta point out though, the choking scene does look like a hardcore kylucc shipper wrote it..........i immediately remembered those gifs from crash pad you know which ones.........

luke. can’t say i’m overly surprised/saddened by his death bc it was built up thoroughly and what rey said describes it quite nicely, but i was extemely shocked to find out the whole ben incident. i truly didn’t think luke was capable of that under any circumstances, the dark side or snoke or whatever must’ve gotten to him in that moment. and this knowledge makes me even more uncomfortably sympathetic to kylo, call me a dirty apologist (even though i don’t CONDONE his actions, i just understand his motives and wish for him to get better), see if i care. i do feel incredibly sorry that luke didn’t find it in him to forgive himself and lived with that horrible thought for so long, but idk man, as it’s already been said it’s not like leia wasn’t even more affected? idk how i feel about the whole exile thing. probably same as with everything kylo does - i kind of understand where he’s coming from but it’s not the right thing to do. 

leia. tbh i feel incredibly sad for the entire resistance and i can’t even imagine how one would feel in her place. carrie was brilliant as always, and although i didn’t cry my eyes out every time she came on screen, i felt it in my heart. the scene in the beginning got me hard and i’d really thought we’d lost her, which would’ve been kinda....not really approppriate imo, but then we got to see her use the force, and to which extent! it was a scene we waited for for years and it did not disappoint. her mom moments with poe were also extremely cute. i was kinda bummed out when she didn’t go out to talk with kylo. i wonder why she didn’t, did she really give up on him completely in that moment? i wonder how they’re gonna do ep9 without carrie :(

poe. and finn. and rose. i enjoyed all their scenes immensely but the big hoof kitty chase on that casino planet and finn’s face off with phasma are definitely highlights. poe just kept being poe throughout the movie which is always a raging success in itself but as i said, i enjoyed his mother-son moments with leia so much i was almost moved to tears. not quite, but almost.  finn looking for rey as soon as he woke up was amazing, of course. as well as his interactions with rose. i’ve heard people say finnrey is dead bc of that lil kiss but i honestly don’t see it? i didn’t see any romantic interest from finn, the only way i interpret this as is rose having an innocent crush on a hero and deciding to take her chance before she thought she would’ve died. about that, too, i love my son with my entire heart but what was he thinking flying directly into that thing :( please don’t ever do that again oh my god. 

overall, i liked the movie, even though it left me with some EXTREMELY mixed feelings and shattered perceptions. imma have to watch it a couple more times to take everything i can in properly but i liked it a lot, and not only because it’s star wars and it’s what i’ve been living for for the past 2 years. one of the things i loved about it was the comedy. it was just the perfect amount, at the right time, in the right places, perfect. although if i hadn’t watched th/or 3 before this i would’ve been taken aback lmao, i wasn’t used to humor in sci-fi/fantasy before. the plotlines i feel like were a bit scattered and hard to keep track of sometimes. tfa remains my favourite star wars movie but if anything, tlj was completely original plot wise (you can’t pick a clear match for it out of the rest of the movies the way you can with anh and tfa), even if it led to some confusion and scattering. 

i probably meant to mention something else but it’s 4 am and i gotta go to bed at some point. please talk to me about this movie if you’ve seen it as well, and if you read this far i hope you have the most wonderful day. 

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

honestly over the years that i constantly watched the E! celeb channel and read celeb mags like “grazia” and “People”, “Ok!” etc etc or women’s mags like women’s day or new idea.... the one thing i could never fucking stand was the fashion panels that were either at the beginning (if it was awards season) or near the end of these mags.... where they’d judge the women far more harshly than the men.

like let’s say judge frida bonhelm (not a real person), fashion director at grazia rates the following real stars:

• sandra bullock at the golden globes in idk alex mcqueen (a high out of 10 ranking in my books bc i know nothing about fashion, but not so for these panellists).

• jake gyllenhaal at the oscars and golden globes, and for the sake of this post he’s either rocked up looking like he’s rolled out of bed with tousled hair etc but still in a suit (just without a tie, bc ala casual tre magnifique! a hot fashion tip: any random french makes you sound classy in fashion and makes Total Sense™️), at the oscars. or let’s say of shits and giggles he’s rocked up shirtless but in a kilt to the golden globes (“he’s going through a hard role guys, let him be!” says fellow panelist Gead mulhern, stylist for new idea). also forget what fashion designer/label JG is wearing, bc who the fuck cares when it’s a man???? amirite??? bc what man is meant to remember that supposedly vital information? none of them. not a single one them. that’s who.

now the reviews go like this:

frida on sandra bullock’s outfit:

sandra, sandra, sandra. you WOWed us last week with your appearance at the *insert random movie title here* premiere! but this. this is absolutely terrible! it doesn’t fit the event at all! that dress doesn’t fit around her waist, the tailoring is fuckin shabby! get a new tailor, sandra! the shoes don’t match, the bag is awful, her hair is fucking awful and the dress again, does not match her skin tone! why did she not get the memo on tanning if she’s wearing a salmon colour???? an absolute bloody shocker for me! -5/10! TRY BETTER NEXT TIME SANDY! (also remember to tan next time, booboo!)

frida on jake gyllenhaal at the oscars:

oooh jakey boy!!!!!!! looking all sexy and tousled boy next door, i see!!!! 😍 absolutely stunning, original, so damn melting sexy that i could just gush all day 😜 and the no tie thing! we all say “BAH!” to that sort of thing! screw the formal attire requirements of the oscars! ugh jake, 100000000000%/10. oh shit, that’s off the charts bc my cat stepped on my keyboard. i meant 10/10! absolutely no thirst here!!!! 😂😉 jakey stuns again!!!! soooo dreamy! *sigh*

frida on jake gyllenhaal at the golden globes in a kilt:

ooooof showing off that ripped bod as a superhero character huh?! what a good way to do it by being shirtless in a kilt! you just never stop stunning people, do you mr. gyllenhaal???? egad, i think i’ll faint looking at this photo for too long! someone get a me defibrillator or something to revive me if i do!!!! 😉☺️ another 10/10 for jake! what a brave and stunning idea!!! 😫 a visionary, really! 🙃

the other panellists generally end up having the same views as frida, but mostly differing on a few points and and final scoring. like jake in both instances basically just rolled out of fucking bed and threw something on (or that’s how it’s styled at least) which looks like it took like 10 minutes at the most to do..... while sandra (and every other female actress they critique) takes like literally 8 hours or more of hair and makeup getting ready for these major events and they get the low rankings????

like this pissed me off so so so much when i read/watched these panels. i was ready to fight every single one of them. and i was so happy when some of the women started fighting back a few years back now...... like elisabeth moss flipping the bird at the E!’s nail cam thing at the oscars i think... cate blanchett getting angry at the camera men for panning up her body in her dress. then there was emma thompson walking up on stage at idk the baftas or whatever carrying her heels and then she threw them over her shoulder. like god. i LIVED for that. and also there’s tiffany haddish turning up in the same alexander mcqueen dress to everything she can bc the goddamn dress is $4,000. like i’d do that to, girl. rock on.

like i hope we consistently get more of this as time goes on. because i’m so sick of male stars getting to turn up in jeans etc and being lauded as “casual, laidback and sexy next door hunk” and getting rated in the high out of ten (/10) range. while the women at these events are turning up looking like superstar material but getting rated like a 2 and get called “fashion challenged” or some other horrendous bullshit (half of them at the very least)..... all because one of these shitty overly judgemental fashion panelists doesn’t like one tiny detail of the woman’s outfit.

it’s ultimately why i stopped purchasing fashion/celeb etc mags and stopped watching E! and stopped engaging with other celeb news material. because it’s exactly where women learn to be catty, overly critical and bitchy.... instead of nice, supportive and non-judgemental. like watching fashion police back in high school made me super fucking bitter for ages... while also making me simultaneously hate myself bc i knew that i could never look like a hollywood star.

actually the worst segment on fashion police and in fashion mags was “starlet or streetwalker” (or something similar) where i remember female stars like kesha and britney spears were constantly labeled as “streetwalkers” which was like a nicer way (in their words) of saying “whore”. i’m pretty sure joan rivers/guiliana rancic called kesha a whore quite a few times actually.... bc of the way she dressed back in the late mid2000s/early 2010s because of her party girl image. like that got on my nerves so much that i was ready to fucking break the tv because they were calling my role models (once i found out kesha wasn’t a literal party girl all the time really lmao) whores while blantantly stupid but totes relatable & quirky/awkward Hot Girl Of The Minute™️ jennifer lawrence (at the time during 2011-2014) was touted as a starlet along with other young female stars.

anyway fashion panels are fucking venom and should fucking stop pitting women against each other. they should also stop lauding men when they turn up with tousled hair and just barely fucking dressed for a red carpet events. everyone is fucking over it. like start being nice to each other y’all. like why is it so fucking hard????