#ing the full time one. And that'll still barely cover the bills. Plus utilities. Plus Internet. Plus car payments and insurance. And

[theood]

I keep one habit I lose three more. I try to get better, five things go wrong in my life and someone dies again, I try to do good, I do everything wrong. I get a job, I feel miserable, I push through, I feel worse.

The cycle repeats and repeats and repeats. Nothing changes. Nothing will ever change because this is all there is to life for me. It's going to be this, and then I'll die.

I'm never even going to get out of this house. It's been worse since we moved here. There's nothing here. I'm going to fucking rot away here and no one will know or care because in the grand scheme of it, I am so fucking unimportant and worthless and I take up more space than I'm worth