#im still in the boat of people focused so much on it and i had been rowing to music in my head

[its-phi]

okok obx4 part 2 spoilers !!!! like major so don’t read this until after you’ve finished or are okay with spoilers but it won’t make sense for you i don’t think.

i need to rant here bc no one i know has finished it.

i feel like this season , despite having some amazing moments, was just a bit lacklustre in a lot of areas. the relationships seems off and i feel like there was a massive disconnect between part 1 and 2. im going to go into more detail below.

so the things i really enjoyed:

- episode 6 had some of the best cinematography i’ve seen in a tv show in fucking ages! they way they included everyone’s reactions in the court scene whilst still focusing on jj was incredible. and then the scenes following that where the riot took place was so amazingly done i loved it

- i LOVED that we finally got to see jj actually let loose the way they described him in all the previous seasons. like we’ve obviously seen him act out and let loose but the raw emotions that jj produced was insane. he went full loose cannon and i for one fucking loved it.

- i really did appreciate the rafe and sarah reunion and i enjoyed seeing rafes character development (at the hands of sofia might i add). to see how she was the only one bringing him food on the boat and the small smiles they shared before the actual reunion, like when her and jb told pope and cleo about their pregnancy and she smiled at rafe. loved it.

- knowing that kie and her parents are at least on speaking terms made me really happy! and seeing her dad stand up for jj with the cops made my heart smile. they could finally see that just bc they might not like kies friends does not mean they aren’t amazing people that have so much care and love for each other.

- i am intrigued to see how they all deal with their grief and how the revenge plot pans out. i think there is going to be some emotional turmoil between jb and kie bc i have the feeling that jb holds kie partly accountable for jj’s death and i’m interested to see how they work through that.

okok now onto my anger with this season bc there’s a lot of it…

- we will start with the obvious here… jj. look i know there is so much speculation and assumptions surrounding rudy leaving or being written off the show and i’m not going to comment on that for the most part bc we will never know the truth. BUT i do think they didnt handle it the best either way. jj hated being alone and for the pouges to bury him in the desert… idk doesnt feel right. (yes ik logistically how could they bring him back to the obx? idk they have done more fucked up shit)

- the disconnect between part 1 and 2 was STRONG for me at least. it just felt really separated and like we just got over some major plot points in the characters between the two. like jj was having a major identity crisis and then we just kinda moved on. and i know is a pretty fast paced show especially with the amount of moving around they do but like huh?

- (this is a big one for me so strap in) THE RELATIONSHIPS OMG! they felt so off this season as a whole. and i don’t just mean romantically. i know it was to kinda set up jj’s death but the way all of the pogues had this significant drift between them and jj just felt odd and not like them. romantically speaking, jiara was lacking majorly. you’re telling me they had barely any physical interaction but they are meant to be together? it just didn’t feel right. if you’re with someone, especially someone you’ve known for as long as they’ve known each other, even with being less physical people, you’re going to hug and kiss and hold on to that person when they are dying or injured or even just going through everything jj was. didn’t like it. wanted more jiara scenes ( especially seeing them alone and how they interact when it’s just them. THE PREGNANCY TROPE? REALLY? after sarah was so visibly uncomfortable when jb brought it up previously… and i know it’s common when you lose a character you fill it with someone else but like what the fuck. it’s rushed and it’s so cliché. and it’s predictable. even without jj making that comment about naming their kid jj, it’s obvious they are going to honour him with that. cleo and pope are gorgeous and amazing and i love them. my only complaint is i want more cleo. she’s too stunning to not have more screen time. I WANT CLEO BACKSTORY IN DETAIL PLEASE.

- despite the feature episode and the part 2 episode being longer it still felt kinda rushed and like they were just skimming over things quickly. like i wanted some dialogue between jj and gr**f about luke and the abuse jj experienced but oh well ig. (i’m upset)

anyway, im kinda bummed with this whole season. i will watch season 5 but i’m not going to be anywhere near as excited. jj was such an integral part of the show for everyone but for me he really tied things together. the interactions all of the pogues had with him really made it so enjoyable and kept the lighthearted, teenager thing alive for me. like without him it’s gonna be hard to remember that they are still young adults that just want to have fun and live their lives to the fullest.

please discuss your thoughts and if you have any differing opinions let me know! i love hearing everyone’s thoughts on it all and am so open to discussions about it all bc at the end of the day it is just a tv show but it’s also so much more to so many people.

love you all

[mering]

letter: dear mer i watched all your lifesteal animatics/animations on youtube (2 of which id never seen before) during a watchparty with some friends a couple days ago. they were awesome and im still thinking about certain parts of them. particularly the movement of vitalasys hands in gash on the cheek after being stabbed, noticing your vitalasy design has a fox muzzle mask(!!!) in even the dogs, and. the entirety of luddites & lambs. the blocks. well i giggled but i quite enjoyed the zam & subz boat scene inclusion & the dramatic shot of block subz on block hors. your shot composition and camera movement is really inspiring and clean even in your unfinished works. ok aaaand signed xoxoxo🪲

THANK YOUUUU <3333333333 i'm glad the hand movement in gash on the cheek stuck with you ^w^ i really like animating pov shots of hands because it's crazy easy to reference. on account of you can just look down. which means i can get subtler movement that feels pretty natural...

my vitalasy went through a lot of iterations. mask makes sense because he's defined by trying to control how he's perceived, but i like the maskless face because it means you will always see his emotions. here's a sketch from around the same time i made even the dogs & a quick attempt at how it would look on my current vitalasy:

luddites & lambs was one of my very first ever attempts at lifesteal fanart (almost exactly a year ago to the day ? wow...) and i can't remember what exactly possessed me to do it blockstyle. i think in part it was because that meant i didn't have to worry about character/set design at all. and because i was so immediately taken with how lifesteal is unequivocally a story about minecraft and how the game functions that not literally representing that felt like it was losing something. plus it maintains the tone of the thing as funny and a little absurd.

which makes the contrast between luddites & lambs and gash on the cheek really funny because you can see how dramatically the way i thought about it all changed over time. when i did luddites & lambs i was still in the process of watching through season 4, which is why it's focused on castle arc/leviathan/early eclipse. but in late s4, while it's still about the game, there is suddenly so much more of a human element. like, straight up drawing the cubes invokes the idea that it's a game with people playing it but you don't see the people, and at a certain point it started feeling like you had to see the people in order to accurately represent the emotional stuff that happens, when gameplay itself becomes so secondary to any of the most important parts of the story. you can draw cubes fighting each other but you can't really draw cubes displaying subtle body language

[solacedeer]

@floydsteeth thank you c: Also i should prob tag @mllorei and @m-mmiy since they asked and i didn’t answer question so heres some general Info about the fun stuff___

- Born in Rhodolite, closer to the southeast, In a town almost entirely made up of farmers

- Circumstances lead to her just leaving home super young, hitching a ride with some vintners who’d only been passing though town and were headed to a farmers market.

- Ended up staying with said vintners, they put her to work tho.

- When they had to go she wanted to stay in the capital because there weren’t any big libraries a walking distance from where they were going. Found out she did NOT like being alone.

- ‘hitchhiked’ away. Ended up on a random boat. Was really bad with harpoons. Can’t swim. Still can’t.

- when she asked them to teach her to swim they said ‘No. Just don’t fall in’ so she didn’t fall in.

- Ended up migrated to Tanzanite by her late teens early twenties. Since she is extremely receptive to any and all attention praise community she naturally gravitated toward the people who dedicated their time to follow Azel around. He likes that she can strip fruit really fast.

(small note; - She does genuinely believe in Azel though, she can’t think of a reason believe a god wouldn’t want to be incarnated.)

-

— ☆

I described her as like a dog or a parrot as opposed to being cool because she isn’t cool.

I’ve drawn her on my blog in the past but she’s always with Keith so she’s always got a stupid silly blank blissed out blank happy face so random info__

- For routes i always have a first Phase where her names Dimitri and then she gets called Demelza be because I’ve done that since forever, Demelzas her real name though.

- I consider her to be an Egotist, not at the expense of anybody and in such a small scale that its probably not all that different in practice then Altruism. But its still there. Because my oc’s need to suffer under the weight of their minds a little

- She fidgets with her gloves, Pinches the skin underneath, Pulls them up against her wrists, Rolls her fingers into the fabric of them.

- Extremely sentimental, still hums Oh my Darlin’ Clementine like the Ladies would while they were working whenever she’s focused. Still likes to watch people cook. Still a little comforted by the sound of crickets from a distance. Very regimental

- Good with first aid. Knows which plants are antibacterial/anti inflammatory + works as a great bandage. Had to adapt to different materials in Tanzanite.

- Good at Playing things off, her caretakers never knew much about her because she’s good at avoiding the truth. As for lying shes got too many tells.

- Overall more of a River then a Lake. Faster moving, ebbs and flows. Extremely aware of the emotions she’s having.

-

- Demelza (last name was Aster but im considering changing it just because that goes WAY back to when I was using her as a MYSTIC MESSENGER oc so)

also heres a better edit of her face. I’d changed some parts because it made sense geometrically but did it make sense within my heart 🤔 ? no- it did not.

[wannaeatramyeon]

Hey, Absolutely love your work, your the reason for my insomnia. (im blaming you yes)

Can you make a baek seongjun scenario where jinho lee is introducing us to him as his new 'assistant' (like the first meeting)? Maybe over dinner lol idek.

Ty for your time tho :)

Hi Anon! Please get some sleep if you can! Although my sleep pattern has been shot to shit since I've started all this wordvom a couple months ago. Interesting what sleep deprivation does to a person, look at all this shit streaming out of me.

Thank you so much for reading and for requesting! I've gone for a little bit more... bittersweet.

Baek Seongjun x Reader: Cooking on the boat

Takes place on Jinho's boat during Seongjun's backstory. You're the cook.

"This is my assistant, Seongjun. Now he's your assistant too."

Being stuck on a boat out at sea, serving food to criminals, wasn't what most kids dream of when they're 6 years old and writing out their ideal job, but if it meant evading the authorities and jail then that's fine by you.

Jinho kept you around because you knew your way around a knife, and you definitely didn't mind getting your hands messy.

Obedient, you sometimes heard him sneer. Like a sheep. Well, fuck him.

You eye up this Seongjun guy. Looks like him and Jinho are cut from the same cloth.

.

.

Seongjun thinks you're quiet, a bit too quiet for his liking.

Taking to your duties and tasks with tunnel vision and a ruthless tenacity. He doesn't know what to make of you.

"You're handling the fish wrong," are your first words to him, a few days after he incessantly buzzed around your dinky little makeshift kitchen.

Your hand grazed his when you grabbed the fish and hip-checked him to move aside.

It's been so long since Seongjun felt a touch that wasn't intended to hurt, that the question mark over you grows bigger.

.

.

You show Seongjun how to rinse the rice properly, he wasn't even aware that there was a wrong way.

How to season food appropriately, and that peppermint leaves rubbed under the nose comes in handy to keep the stench of all the seafood away.

With practiced hands, how to clean the scales, the fin and fillet the fish. Removing most of the bones in one piece, making the most of the meat.

When Seongjun first does it and butchers the attempt, you give him a light slap on the arm and a huff.

He gives you a smile in return.

.

.

Seongjun watches you move around in the kitchen.

Your ease and flow in the kitchen gives him some semblance of peace.

It reminds him a little of his mom and his heart aches.

.

.

Little anecdotes of Seongjun's life in Japan slips through. He focuses on the good things, as few as there was.

He tells you a little of his judo when you poke fun at his cauliflower ears.

You tell him how important it is to not waste any food when prepping, and he in returns shares how his mother always makes the most amazing meals out of next to nothing.

One day, Seongjun mentions that if things worked out, he would have liked to have opened up a soba noodle shop with his mom.

You ask him if he could make you some noodles. Give you a little taste of what that life could have been like.

.

.

Seongjun places the noodles in front of you, served in a mess-tin. The boat had little room and the men had little appreciation for luxuries such as crockery.

You take a mouthful-

And find it absolutely revolting.

Seongjun watches you as you school your face and swallow it down with a struggle.

"Is it good?"

"... Not bad." You grit out your little white lie, thinking about his soba shop dream. You could at least give him this mercy.

It's unexpected when he laughs. Is this the first time you have seen and heard this? His face looks years younger, and the sound surprisingly care-free. You didn't think people like you and him were still capable of such joy.

"Sorry. I actually messed it up."

"Baek Seongjun! And you still fed me this shit?"

Wiping tears of mirth from his eyes, he tells you "Yes."

You're in half a mind to pour the rest of this disgusting meal all over him. But seeing him like this, it's contagious.

The sound of your laughter soon joins his.

.

.

Years from now, when Seongjun is building his life in South Korea, he still remembers you giggling alongside him.

It reminds him that some things in life are priceless.

[phoenix-positivity]

12 april 2024

busy day. currently triggered. so why am I writing this then. good question. want to stay aware I guess. am dissociating. im overwhelmed. I'll put on a song I like. I tried grounding earlier and it worked but it was weird cause I think it wasn't me. whatever. got triggered outside. likely the smell. smell has been REALLY intense today. I think it must be pollen? I saw a lot of pollen floating around. i started dissociating outside. I used the grapefruit scent stick outside. At home I put on this one lotion I bought that has a cooling effect and smells strongly of menthol. I also had a sour candy. I hated it, it was so sour. I might put on the menthol again.

aye. youtube is autoplaying a song that makes me dissociate more..

no clue how much time passed but I'm back and more grounded I think?

apparently an hour has passed.

The song playing right now gives me so much strength and hope. It really hits my heart. ( A.C.E. - Callin' ) I don't know why but that song always gives me hope for the future. It's about self acceptance for me.

I'm so out of it. I think making this post has a purpose. I think I was going to go over my day.

My mother asked me to go for a walk with my grandma and I agreed. My grandma needs to practice walking. She has a walker I bought her but even with the walker she still struggles. My mother drove us to a location at the water. I recognized it from trauma memories. I didn't know we were going there and I hadn't been there for years. I didn't want to get out of the car at first but I didn't want to tell my mother and grandma why so I just got out reluctantly and told myself it was okay. There was also a strong scent of spring. A lot of memories resurfaced from seeing the location. Luckily the memories were pretty mild trauma (in terms of how I judge it for myself). I was extremely on edge that my abuser was going to be there. I was scanning my environment like crazy. Eventually I managed to be more calm. I focused more on the water and the boats and the wind and the smell of the water. There was also a lot of people walking their dogs. We went inside somewhere to have a drink and cake. I felt safe there. I had no memories inside that location.

I had set the goal for myself to have lunch in the city to do exposure there. Even though I did unexpected exposure already, I still wanted to proceed with my plan. I walked to the city choosing the most scary roads. I usually ask myself: 'which route brings me the most fear to walk?' and then I pick the one that scares me the most to challenge my fears. I felt proud of myself for the way I walked. I decided to not have lunch because it was rather late, but I did go to the lunch location to just walk around it. I did exposure at another store that really scares me. I managed to stay inside about 2 minutes. Then I walked the scary road back to the bus stop and took the bus home.

I'll have to take note of the resurfaced memories so I can maybe process them in therapy if they don't fade to the background again.

[just-orbiting-you]

I’m so so glad you’re being honest and transparent about AYS and jikook’s dynamics change. I felt really weird after I finished watching the show and when i came to X and tumblr most jikookers were focusing on the skinship moments but no body is talking about how off everything felt between them. I think you summed it up pretty nicely so I won’t repeat what was said but watching how jk acted when jm was sick made my heart sink. I felt so so bad for jm i was praying that there’s someone from staff at least taking care of him. There was zero worry or compassion from jk which shocked me a lot. I think this is where I realized that they’re definitely not together and I’m ok with that. Kinda relieved tbh, i feel like i finally have a clear answer. Now regarding tae being in the next episode, i saw the clip and JK was being his usual passive aggressive self lol, that’s just how he is with tae and now with jimin too apparently. I have to admit, now that I’m seeing jkk in a whole different light I’m not worried about how different jk is gonna treat vmin, none of them is in a relationship so I don’t care if he’s nicer to v. I just hope jimin had a great time and enjoyed himself (tae and jk too) i hope they all had a good time. I only wish jimin wouldn’t receive hate after the episode no matter how it turns out.

hey anon, im responding but with intention that im hoping you’ll see the response :). i don’t really want other anons in my inbox criticizing your words. from someone who thought like you, i hope we can enjoy the show and engage with it critically instead of just writing it off as a "be careful what you wish for."

while i think this point could get us backed into a corner a little bit, i've had a few anons, including this one write about how they could be omitting the truth for the sake of the show, to fit a narrative. if we turn to speculation instead of looking at what they show us head on, it can be hard to fully believe. what we do know is they had to see each other to plan the show, they saw each other at yoongi's concert, at hobi's enlistment (and maybe drinking that night before who knows). i think face era was a hindrance to their friendship, but as the year went on things got better. i think about that tiny clip from jimin's production diary livestream and jimin was so excited to see jungkook, jungkook was all smiles like nothing changed.

i think, even the people we love most, we don't see often or even don't try to make an effort to see based in individual circumstances. and we don't know their circumstances outside of bts and solo schedules. with bts going on group hiatus, things were already going to change. relationships change naturally and i think giving jikook that grace is okay. i don't think their relationship has turned into one of vitriol or negativity. they still very much care about each other and i think if this was how the year started off, the distance from each other probably propelled them into deciding to enlist (distance makes the heart grow fonder and such). also i think you can see them start to fall into their ways as the trip carries on. i felt a dramatic shift in tone after their boat ride and once jungkook cooks for them, it feels like we are at the jikook we know. so i hope this show was able to help them reconnect.

I felt so so bad for jm i was praying that there’s someone from staff at least taking care of him. There was zero worry or compassion from jk which shocked me a lot.

this anon and a few other posts in the jikook tag were talking about this and i think i have changed my opinion on this. jungkook has known jimin for years, he probably knows when jimin needs in stressful situations and that might just be a little space and some jokes to get him laughing. jungkook didn't bother him when he rested, he let him be. i think jungkook did what a friend would do in this instance, and try to go about their day making the most of it while conscious of jimin's state. possibly the camera involved maybe could have escalated the level of jokes around jimin's misfortune. but from what was on camera, jimin started feeling better after the boat and they ended the trip on a good note.

i don't even want to speak on the tae stuff, because that will open a big can of worms. i appreciate you coming forward as well to talk about it as well. definitely rewatch the show too i think a second watch could change how you're viewing it.

[the-kr8tor]

I'm not gonna lie- r being somewhat nonchalant in my hobie hcs are because of the fact im inclined to be like that since I cannot handle any sort of affection. You tell me I look cute and I've gone feral boutta rip you to shreds (affectionately) Daily Hobie HC! Literally no connection to what I'm writing but im making those cardboard sharks decor things and im gonna give it a spiked collar. The morning has been awfully chilly for going out of winters, your hands clinging to your mug of hot chocolate and pressing your body into your human heater of a partner, Hobie. Hobie, admittedly, has been hating the chilliness, but he's more focused on how tiny you look curled up into him. Hobie pulls the thick blanket around the two of you as you both lay on the couch, the rain sounding like people jumping on top of the houseboat. Originally, you two had a date planned today, but due to the heavy rain, you both had to cancel it, which admittedly had the both of you feeling a little more demotivated than usual. However, Hobie suggested to have just a casual movie day, which sounded like the best idea currently. God forbid he gets into the kitchen with the stove on...you'll never forget the chewy soup or what happened when he was left unattended one time. As he flicks through the corniest romance movies he can find to laugh at, you pull down your socks slightly, pressing your cold feet to his side where his sweater had hitched up. Hobie exclaims with shock, flinching away with a feigned bitter look while you laugh like a villain. Eventually, he finds a movie while you properly cuddle up to his side, head on his chest as his hand slowly warms you up, the both of you sipping hot chocolate while watching one of the cringiest romance movies he could find. Hobie laughs the hardest at your disgusted expression whenever something extra romance-y happened, the both of you making fun of the entire movie as it happened, looking away to drink the hot chocolate in order to not lose appetite. The movies keep going, from corny, cheesy romance to downright terrible comedy. However, they all become just material for the jokes you both keep passing, teasing each other and guffawing at each other's overexaggerated expressions. Hobie, the entire time, is a little more focused on your reactions, your happiness and laughter extremely contagious, especially to him. His fingers softly ran through your hair, gently undoing some tangles that occurred. He knew how much they annoyed you at times, considering people immediately assume that you don't brush out your hair, even though you do it passionately out of frustration at times. An idea for payback entered his mind. Hobie's hands cup underneath your knees, pulling your legs over his own and having you sit sideways. He's done this before, so you aren't too fazed. However, the moment you feel his hand hold your ankles down, you knew you made a grave mistake by letting your guard down. Hobie quickly attacks you with tickles, releasing your ankles and moving up, pinning you underneath himself as he torments you with his nimble fingers. Revenge for practically giving him frostbite with your cold feet. -🐦‍⬛

(for scientific purposes) you're adorable 🐦‍⬛ anon 😉

Yeess give the sharks accessories!!!

Daily Hobie HC ‼️

Oh to cuddle up with the love of your life while it's raining outside 😍😍😍😍😍

It's so cold here rn and i felt this hc in my bones 🥰 I want my own cuddlebug too even though he likes tickling me (he better not say anything when i accidentally kick him bc of the tickles) I could go for some hot chocolate rn

Chewy soup

I still love that reference lol i can see you're one of the OGs hahhahahha

I bet if the house boat can handle a fire pit Hobie would light it up on cold winter nights so you two could roast marshmallows together while he makes s'mores abominations by stacking it until it can barely fit in his mouth 😂

[pbandjesse]

Im at an event right now. I am having a good time! It's a bit to loud though. And there is still hours to go. But I had a good day, just also a very long day. So much activity. And camp starts tomorrow. Crazy.

I slept okay last night. James put a suitcase under the air conditioner to make it actually blow over the bed frame and allow me to sleep much more comfortably.

Waking up was a little tough. But I was excited for the day. A little nervous but excited. Because today we were jumping in the harbor. I cleaned my face and put on sun screen. I wore my favorite bathing suit. I threw on my big button up shirt. I put glitter on my eyes.

James was so cute. And filled my water mug with ice and we pretty quickly got in the car to go. We left a little before 830. Not on purpose. But I am glad we did.

We were able to get absolutely amazing parking right by the pier. We had to loop the block a few times to get it but James handled it and got us a very good spot which a short walk.

We would stop to use the bathroom. And then we were on the other side of the check point. The security guard asked if we were "jumpers...swimmers" and we laughed because jumpers sounded so menacing. But we were there and excited.

We would check in and get our wristbands. And there was a lot of people! Not just the 150 but all the media and spectators and speakers. I knew the mayor would be speaking but there was other speakers too eventually.

We had to wait a bit. And it was a bit bright and sunny and hot. But it was just making me more excited. We would be in the second to last group. Which was fine with me.

We would get pictures and chat with people. James saw some people we knew. We got a picture with Mr Splash from the baseball stadium. And we even saw some former coworkers. Specifically Chelsea who was an educator at the musuem but now works for the water front partnership. Who was putting on this event. I was excited to see her and be excited about the swim together.

Me and James were media darlings today. We were interviewed multiple times. Before, during, and after the swim. And it was a lot of fun! I was feeling really cute in my bathing suit and Crocs. And James was handsome as always. And it was fun telling people why we wanted to be a part of this.

I was getting a little anxious waiting. So I focused on watching everyone. I really enjoyed hearing from Brandon Scott, the mayor. He's so young and it's just nice how much he cares. He's trying really hard and I appreciate that. We also had the comptroller. And the man who pushed the entire initiative. He brought his Emmy with him that they won last night for the documentary they made about the harbor. Super cool. I do not know if he jumped in the harbor with the Emmy. I hope he did.

We were the second to last group so we were dancing and enjoying the day. The media had a boat so they had lined it to take pictures and there was a lot of people on the pier waiting to see people jump. But they were basically all gone by the time it was our turn. For the best honestly, I didn't want so many people watching.

We got our life jackets and stood in line and chatted with the others in our group. We had to get a little safety talk with the life guards. And then it was the count down. Me and James held hands. And we jumped!

The water honestly felt amazing. It was a combination of being so over heated and the water just being a really nice temperature. It was briney for sure, a little salty. But it didn't smell and it didn't burn me away like it was acid. Ok would float around with my little life jacket. And swim towards James. Who would grab me and throw me around and spin me and we were being really silly.

Because we were almost the last group we got a couple extra minutes. And it was so lovely. I would swim to a more open area and just float on my back and enjoy the sky. It was weird for sure. Like I was seeing buildings and not just sky!! But it was so cool and I was really happy. I love being in the water. I love floating. It was great.

I would get interviewed while I was in the water. I got to talk about turbidity! I was surprised I could see my toes! I really excited to share some science with people.

I was also very aware of people taking my picture. I would find some of them online later. It was fun. I was happy. But soon it was time to get out.

We dried off and took some after swim pictures. Got some follow up questions from the media. And rinsed off at the showers. Said thank you to the security. And walked back to the car.

We would get home at 11. I got a little rattled in the car when my mug of water fell over. But we got parked and headed inside.

We quickly got showers. My hair felt a little strange but I washed it and it would actually be really soft. Excellent.

I would got dressed and went to sit downstairs. I would sit in front of the fan and brought Crabcake out to wander around the studio. Sweetp was there and was being chill. He would sniff Crabcake and didn't seem thrilled by what he found but he wasn't trying to hurt him. I kept reminding him to be kind.

James would make me an omelette and they would have a little sandwich. It was nice. We were just having a good day together. I'm so excited to have Sundays with them again.

Their schedule will be changing in July. And we will have Sundays off again together and I am super happy about that. Like we are going to be able to try so many places and go see things like we hadn't been able to before. I'm very excited.

We would lay on the couch for the last hour before we had to go out again. Had a little snack. Talked. Watched videos. It was nice.

I would fix my makeup and put on my white dress and we were soon off.

We stopped at five below but I had no luck looking for the disco ball I was trying to surprise Callie with. The hunt continues.

We got over to the museum and it was so nice to be in the AC. It was also really nice to see Gaby. It's been to long. We would chat for a bit but then we had to go find Jesse and Meril.

It was going to be a really good night. A weird night. An unknown. But a good night.

I would jump into helping Jesse outside. He was sweeping and I would take over from that for a bit. I would also go and get a trash grabber and picked up all the little pieces of trash I could find around the water. Doing this really made my forearms and wrists hurt. Like really bad. But I was happy to do it. No trash in the harbor!!!

I got to see a big turtle. A red earred slider. And I would have a really lovely conversation with one of the staff members who was setting up the tables. He's 62 be from Philly and showed me some of the events he's worked recently. Just a real sweetheart.

This event would be interesting. It is a white party. And I wore my white dress to match. And everyone has been so pretty. And nice. Even when I'm goofy. Like I was trying to be super professional during set up and I saw a truck pull up and I went to check in and remind them they can't set up until 3. And they go "you're really going to play that with us?" And I look at the time and it's 2:59. And I was like oh my God I'm so sorry. And they said I was very feisty and also pretty. And then one of them gave me a hug and we all laughed and they went to set up.

I would get a little upset and over stressed when we learned they weren't feeding us. No catering. There was food trucks but they didn't provide us vouchers or anything. And I had no money or my credit card. I forgot them at home. I was just very unsettled and unsure what I was going to do. I was so hungry by 5. But eventually I remembered my emergency $20 I keep in the back of my phone and I would take a break before the rain started.

I walked up the McDonald's after sitting at the desk with Meril and checking in about eating. She would go once I came back.

The walk was a little hard on me. Made my calves hurt s lot. But I was determined to get French fries and a little sandwich.

The girl at the register was confused by my order. And I lead with this is weird but I want a cheese burger but no patty. And she was like alright. But then gave me just a patty in a box. She got the manager when I said I think there was a miscommunication. And he understood right away and I got my little cheese sandwich with mustard and a pickle. Excellent.

I walked back and would chat with the hired security about where to send overflow parking. Because the lot was getting full pretty quick.

There would be some drama. A table fell over. It started raining really hard. The band didn't know when to go on. It was a whole thing.

But I tried my best to remain professional. I like this job a lot. It's straight forward most of the time. And tonight was only strange because it was different. It's not a regular event. But it's been fun.

And also I got a very good tip.

It's 1030 now and we are all hanging out. The bar will close soon. And my phone is dying so I'll run it to the charging dock in the gallery while we clean up. And I hope to be home by 1230.

And then tomorrow is the first day of camp. And Jess's birthday!! I have already gotten a lot of messages while camp loading was happening today but I am handling it best I can. I hope it's a fun day. I am determined to have a good time.

I hope you all have a good night. Sleep well. Be safe. And take care of your local water system!!

[thewickerking]

sorry for the essay in your asks I’m just studying child development/psych and I Have Thoughts

nonono ur so fine! i enjoy conversing abt it :] im a psych major so were in similar boats! i keep being disappointed in my fellow students ways of talking about children, especially in childhood development focused classes, and there was a particular instance i will never forget of describing a a case study of a young child who was being violent to others, and the first and only question another student asked being "is this disorder often found in serial killers? cause this sounds like what ive heard abt serial killers" and my jaw fucking dropped. I was wearing a mask so no one really noticed but MY first reaction to the case study was "hey a lot of these behaviors were present in MY BROTHER and while he's doing a lot better i wonder if there's anything i can learn from this study that might help him" and we didn't get even close to that. i didn't need psych classes to be appalled at the way adults think of and treat children, but it was certainly not fun. these things are also deeply personal to me because of my own violent behavior as a child due to an amount of trauma that would easily quadruple the length of this post. luckily for me, my mother had similar experiences and reactions to them, and was able to meet me where I was at and found outlets for energy and stress even before she knew about all of the things that were happening to me. getting into martial arts (and later therapy) was not a cure all but was incredibly effective in stopping me from attacking other children and feel more capable of expressing what i was feeling. I was still a kid so its not like i became perfect lmao but it helped a lot. my mom didn't have the same treatment and to this day will get comments about people who knew her as a child that are "just glad she's not a serial killer" and it very much affects her to this day. i know friends who have been told BY TEACHERS that they seem like they could be a serial killer when they grow up. my uncle, who died by suicide, was the son of a serial killer and his family refused to raise or help him because they were afraid he'd "turn out like his father" of whom he never met due to being born in prison. in turn he was extremely abused by the foster care system and relied on intensely unhealthy coping mechanisms and struggled to raise his children and died as their sole provider and leaving them behind. My brother has also displayed violent behavior and made violent threats to other people and struggled with a lot of things because of that. people frequently express they're glad he's not in prison. i may have clung to specifically the serial killer comments a bit longer than necessary because of personal association, but while it's something i study, it's also deeply close to home, and i know how awful long terms affects can be. while that context is not necessary to know why i care so heavily about this, it does make insensitive off hand comments from my alleged peers cut deep.

SORRY this got tangenty and heavy and complaining abt psych majors is not targeted towards u anon lol its just exhausting to have been around unforgiving teachers and adults and seeing its negative affects on me, my family, and my friends, and then seeing similar mindsets in my generation that claims to want to be better than our predecessors. psych is genuinely interesting to me, and due to my early intervention and good luck with therapists, ive seen what benefits people can glean from experiences with the psychiatric field. unfortunately, ive also seen countless ways its failed countless people, and being able to see the start of harmful thinking in my peers makes it incredibly difficult to be optimistic and also pisses me off lmao. as much as this is my choice of career and it matters to me, there are extremely harmful ideas that make up the foundation of modern (and obviously past) psych and seeing people take this at face value makes me spectacularly miserable. 🫠🫠 but its very nice (and refreshing) to talk to other ppl abt these topics from a shared pov that kids aren't evil. Which sounds so much simpler and more common than it actually is 😮‍💨

[madisonrooney]

late night/early morning emotional thoughts about miley once again

it breaks my heart how the miley fandom on tumblr died out. i had SO much fun in it in the bangerz era. it was like the second major wave of my miley fandom, with the initial hyperfixation starting in 2009 and going up until the end of HM being the first. even if i was too shy to actively talk to more than like 3 people, i still felt involved and it felt so interactive. to have open discussions going on, to have organic thoughts about things happening, not to mention a couple great update blogs and boatloads of content. it was just great.

i dont think i was fully aware that it was so depleted until when younger now was about to come out and it was essentially a ghost town. it was sad. some time after that i think, i somehow found that there still was an active fandom, it was just on twitter now. that was what really broke my heart. ive had too much social anxiety to ever get twitter (primarily bc the focuses of these fandoms are like. actually on there) and by the time i discovered this, that part of me as far as miley goes had kinda slowed down, likely at least partially as a result of the lack of the tumblr fandom. ive said this before, and i still hate to admit it, but im not at the same level as i was 2009-14, even up until 2016 ish, and theres nothing i can really do about that now. i cant force it. i still love her to bits and have talked about how about a year ago i realized i was neglecting my miley fandom more than i wanted to and worked to make it more active and im so glad i did, but i cant force it to be like what it was then, and thats ok. its not like she herself did anything wrong to cause that.

buuuuuuut there is a little someone else to blame lol.

obviously a certain someone who i started hyperfixating on in 2014 being the only other celebrity i ever hyperfixated on to that degree and is STILL the only other one, being much closer to my age, and being much more accessible to the point where i met her for the first time within about a single year of this hyperfixation and would go on to meet her more than a dozen more times and establish a somewhat personal relationship with her...thats gonna rock the boat a bit. its hard to feel that personal connection with miley that i used to now that i know what a real connection like that feels like. so....i guess if theres anyone to blame, you can only blame miss chloe lol.

bottom line tho, i really do miss that tumblr fandom and wonder what things would be like had it survived through younger now, plastic hearts, and up to esv. but again, i cant force myself to go back to where i was then. its just strange that there are still a decent amount of active fandoms on here but that one practically died out entirely. maybe people feel the opposite of what i do and LIKE being able to interact with the focus of their fandom. i am too nervous for that lol.

[sinelanguage]

alright so it’s another Art Museum Review, this time from LA. as always: im not an actual artist, i have never studied art, but i do enjoy Looking At Art

The Broad:

Broad as a museum’s main gallery is very…. Instagram Selfie Art forward? yayoi kusama type art that’s easy to take a selfie with, but doesn’t leave an emotional impact. i didn’t vibe with much of it, and felt a bit pretentious about that, until i got to the rotating exhibit and loved a good portion of it.

The museum itself was really cool architecturally. There’s a point in the stairwell they show a little glass window into the storage room, so it was neat to see the canvas. still, the main exhibit made me nervous about dragging my entire family there, but the rotating exhibit was worth it.

When All Is Lost, Who Do You Run To? Amani Lewis: this piece was incredible in person, and I don’t think it has the full impact online. The shimmer/texture/sparkle doesn’t get though online. It’s a very dynamic piece to look at, and effective at its goal of communicating subject’s own drive/empowerment. Really, really cool piece and the main piece in the actual gallery the struck a chord with me

Toba Khedoori, Untitled: Khedoori’s work focused really utilized empty space well in two very different ways. Park benches was a piece that felt alive but alone, with empty park benches surrounded by empty but used canvas. The fireplace piece had the opposite impact— a dark black canvas making the fireplace seem cozy, almost. Really cool contrast.

Infinite Expansion, Mike Kelley: Really enjoyed this one. Unnerving and hard to look at from eye strain, layers of each paper gently folding off, just a loud and stark black and white chaos with a quaint cabin in the center. I thought the description was overwrought though (describing borders as a celestial space divine and cosmic?) and the piece was more effective without context, just a small kernel of familiar comfort lost within noise.

The Getty:

The Getty as a museum was gorgeous, but filled with the type of art I don’t care about. Just an absolute other world— amazing architecture on a cliff side view of LA. The gardens were great, and they only let so many people in so even though there were a lot of people lined up the place didn’t feel crowded.

that being said; most the regular exhibit of the Getty was the type of art i (someone not familiar with art) can’t appreciate that much. Technically skilled portrait and religious art is impressive to see but I feel nothing. There are exceptions of course:

Turner: Turner’s paintings are exceptional. Really like his less realistic pieces and i adore the vibe of this, the light and uplifting and the only dark of the piece the intimidation of the ocean itself. Anyway it’s great. I can only appreciate this type of of art if it’s sad women, flowers, or boats at sea. what does this say about me. who knows.

Arthur Tress, Dreams Collection: Dream collection was great. One of the few times i go see a piece of art and experience exactly what the artist is intending: an unnerving childhood dream. SO many of the dream collection is this perfect encapsulation of a simple fear in the most unsettling way possible, or a simple normal occurrence framed as a fear. favorite is the hands on the steps picture which is the latter.

anyway REALLY liked this guys vibes. tress had a whole exhibit and a lot of the art was still great, either slightly unsettling or deeply intimate. the bandaid piece was really good.

[vampppeach]

✿ ➜ Dream of Scarlet Sun — Pilot Chapter

Language: English

Words: 1,668

Story Synopsis: Eira is the daughter of Sunsbury's president and she unexpectedly went missing, only to meet what appears to be an angel.

Note: There's much more to the actual plot of this but Dream of Scarlet Sun isn't my main focus right now (since im focused on writting The Gift) so it might have to wait for a bit but i do have interest in continuing it. I decided to post the pilot because it took me a lot of effort and id like to share with more people.

Wake up, go to work, come back home without a worry in the world, be detached from consequences and actions, and live automatically. I may not be the best at my job and I may not have the most friends there, but I still attend, never missing a day. It's not like I'm dedicated either, this office job isn't my goal, nothing is, and not even I can tell why I'm so punctual, maybe it's just easier like this, to conform.

In more than one way, I am a waste of money, waste of time, I should enjoy getting to work at my dad's company, many people dream of having this life, so why do i feel so hollow? How many times have I excused myself from work by rushing into the bathroom to cry? I don't know how the future will be, I don't have any skills or aspirations, and I'm not sure of anything at all, still, I walk forward, too afraid to turn back and defy my father, too afraid to look back and see something I don't like.

With my phone in my hands, I see no notifications, no tasks from work, no one to talk to, I guess that without people, all I'm left with is peace, a peace so quiet, so dull that slowly drains the life out of me. Putting it away, I try to sleep through the silent night, but the fridge buzz keeps me awake. Facing the wall, the concrete texture blurs, and with a closed throat I realize squinting my eyes won't stop the tears from running down my face.

Tomorrow won't be different, it never is. Nothing changes, I never change, and I'm aware of it. Curling into a ball, I'm reminded of the nights I blacked out like this, sobbing to sleep, a hand of mine reaching a lock of my hair to mimic caress, but the muffled sound of my voice following drowning me. I'm not enough, I need change, I need something different, something new.

Snatching the keys from my purse, my mind went blank and before I knew it, I was driving mindlessly with no destination, no direction, just forwards. For a moment, I saw no path behind me, in my trail there was only road after road ahead. Couldn't look back, and even if I did, the darkness of the night had already consumed what was past, the headlights being my only guide, showing me the way.

Soon, the dead trees parted before my eyes, opening the horizon and revealing a starry sky from behind its dry branches, reaching for the moon like thin hands, attempting to grasp its light, unreachable, far away from their dark claws. I found myself at the coastline, boat boarding and unloading point, sparsely habited. Alone, I parked my car near the pier, stepping out to hear the hissing of cold, dark waters, brushing over the sand idly.

It was so dark all I could see was the city at the end of the horizon, far, far away with stars adorning the black pitch above it. Looking up, the moon smiled at me, inviting me for an embrace, to wipe away the tears from my semi-dry cheeks. So beautiful, yet so distant, while on this earth I'll never be as bright as mother Moon whose purpose is known and takes care of the job splendidly.

Smiling back, I accepted her embrace, my black heels clicking over the creaking old wood beneath me, my head facing upwards. The moon in the sky was just too far away, but if I dived right into her cradling arms, her reflection would bring me as close as I could get. To be shiny and seen, watching it all from away, pretty and painless, it's all I desire.

Staring up at me was a bottomless pit, it called me. Her smile was distorted by the light breeze that messed my hair bun and reminded me of my wet cheeks, gapping my wounds again. My eyes drip into the sea, the salty tears becoming one with the ocean and beckoning the cells in my body to join them. Frozen in place, I saw the reflection of a hopeless one with a whole life ahead of her wavering, pondering if she chose the right option. If it were anyone else, I wouldn't want them to dive, id want them to find happiness in life, with a single step back I pulled the sad girl away from her death.

— What are you doing, miss? — With hesitance, a breach bloomed in the moment, the quietude interrupted by the voice of a woman... No, of a man. The tone, soft and tender, made my head turn. Just the sight of Him made my eyes wide, the tallest man I've ever seen, dressed in all white, as pale as can be.

My body trembled, tangled in emotions and thoughts then pulling me down like roots, I fell to my knees but He was right there to catch me, holding me in His arms. The warmth of His body, the gentle grin, made me tear up, sobbing as I brought my hands closer to my face.

— I-I don't know... — I cried, hurt and afraid cradled in the arms of a stranger with a white rose crown, never once opening His eyes. His white hand wiped away the tears that flowed down to my chin, He tilted my head to face Him with the tip of his finger. — You were about to jump into those dark waters. Do you want to talk about it? —

While he tucked the curly hair out of my face I couldn't help but tear up again. — I don't know what to do... I-I think I'm doing something wrong...! — In a cracking voice, I brought both hands closer to my face, trying to hide the embarrassing expression and tears of shame.

— So you've decided that's where your life ends? At an empty, cold beach? I can tell you are lonely, and I can tell you are afraid... That's not where you want to end, Miss Eira. — Holding my wrists, He pulled the hands away from my face, all I could see was that mysterious man's smile. — You deserve more than a life of fear and uncertainty. —

Is it true? Do I deserve better? I'm unsure, I always am. Suddenly the silence of the waves blessed our ears again, this time, the darkness surrounding me became familiar and safe, I had now found light. With tears streaming down my face, I couldn't make a sound, looking into the distance the realization finally hit me. What am I doing with myself?

Crouching at the edge of the pier, He held me carefully, laying me in his arms. — Before meeting light, you must meet darkness. Close your eyes and hold your breath. — I obliged and he laid me above the water, slowly immersing me in. Gradually relaxing after the initial shock of cold water hitting me, His hands let go, and I sank in. Drowning wasn't scary, not to me, it felt like being held once again, like being in His arms.

Morning that same day, the rising sun above Sunsbury, lit up the scenery of a lively garden. Bushes of green, white and red surrounding the black metal bistro table and chair set, beautifully arranged, and yet, stealing the landscape, an old pale man sat, looking fowards. Contrasting colorless, the long wrinkled fingers traced over pieces of an unfinished puzzle, it's white eyes could not see the image, but through palms he felt the shapes, envisioning the object in mind.

Interrupting the silence, a much proper young man dressed in a similar suit walked up to him, carrying a folder between index and thumb and extending it to the other. — Mr. Wolf, your daughter has been reported missing. She was last seen leaving her apartment around 10PM. — swatting the hand away, he didn't even bother to change expressions. — Im busy, come to me when i am not. —

— ...Respectfully, I believe this case is much more urgent than your game. Your daughter could be in great danger sir.—

He did not blink, not even a singular wrinkle motioned towards a change of emotion, Bouchard Wolf sat there, unfazed. — ...Reinforce the security of my apartment. If those criminals wanted to get to me, they shouldn't have come for Eira. — he placed another piece on the puzzle, done speaking. The lack of care about her current situation made Santiago's blood boil, he held back many insults, but the hatred was clear in his voice.

— GPASS is investigating the case. The circumstances of this disappearance seem supernatural, but our team will work through it. — Government Protective Services Against the Supernatural, is such a unique and long name. It's a useless organization, at least to Buchard, all it does is drain money from him since they barely got any supernatural activity after the incident. The thought left a bitter taste in Mr. Wolf's mouth, he did not respond.— ...I'll keep you updated through emails. —

Turning around in disappointment, Santiago was ready to exit that awkward scenario but was interrupted by Bouchard's voice. — Before you go, tell me, what is the picture of the puzzle? — facing back, he looked down at the garden table, noticing the pieces that were put together. A sheep standing over some sort of brown box, bleeding onto a chalice and surrounded by people and angels.

Santiago looked into the sheep's eyes, seeing humanity in its gaze. The artist seems to have little knowledge of drawing animals, the face was uncanny. Looking back at Bouchard, he mumbled quietly. — ...A lamb. It's a picture of a lamb. — a description so shallow that stripped the painting of its meaning, but was enough to make an old man smile. — Ah, yes. This one was my favorite one. — He spoke to himself, his eyes unable to realize Santiago had left him alone in the garden to go back to his shift.

[echantedtoon]

I'm Blue Ch4 The Dreaded Meeting P2

(Nori is the name of edible seaweed for those who don't know.)

It smelt like fish. But what else should she have expected from the local fish market.

It took her a while to get there. And already she was regretting it so, so much. There was too many sounds going on at ounce and too many people pushing against her even while she walked and for the entire time her antenna was pressed firmly against her head. WHY?! Oh why did her granny think this was a good idea?! She felt absolutely awful being made to go out for a second time that day. What was the whole point of going out early so she could get home if she was going to be sent out for a second time?! Oh well. It's not like she could say no to her grandmother if she really wanted to anyways. Right now she was focusing on trying not to get run over or fall over with the onslot of people crowding around her, too many vibrations of everyone walking around to comprehend which way is which from the moment she stepped into the giant crowd of it. It wasn't too hard of a trip to get there, after all she had passed the docks before on her way too and from the beach. It always smelt like fish, saltwater, and tons of different kinds of sun block lotions from all the people going there in the hot sun...or maybe that smell wafted over from the beach? It was always noiser than the beach too. Lots of people talking, venders shouting over the crowd for people to buy their goods, the metal and industrial sounds of the boats bringing in cargo and all the crates of goods being unloaded. She hated this. Couldn't see and barely got around in this place....But she better get this over with and get back out before all of this gives her a massive headache. ......But how the HECK was she supposed to find seaweed cuttings in this place if she couldn't tell which direction she was walking in...Ask someone she guessed? Great. This day just got better and better didn't it?

"AH!!" Someone from behind her pushed her forward and before she could stop herself, her whole face and front upper body collided with someone in front of her. Immediately she struggled to push herself from the other moving body in the dark, and held up her hands. "Im s-sorry! Im so sorry!"

"Hey, it's ok," a female voice answered back, "It was just an accident." There was a small pause as whoever was talking to her eyed her face. "Are you lost?"

"I um-.....Yeah." She deflated. "I'm sorry."

"Hey, it's not a big deal," the voice reassured, "Im here to help out everyone anyways since it's more crowded this year than usual. What are you looking for? Maybe I can help you find it."

Blue perked up a bit at her offer but still held up her hands. "Oh no. I couldn't bother you like that."

"Hey. It's no problem! It's what Im supposed to be doing here anyways, and you look like you could use a hand."

Looks like it huh? Yeah. She guessed she always did. "Oh...I mean, if you're sure-"

"Absolutely!"

"...This may sound strange, but Im looking for seaweed cuttings."

"Seaweed?," the lady asked confused.

Blue smiled nervously with a chuckle. "Oh it's n-not for me. My granny grows plants, she just needs some of these for her tank."

The lady in front of her nodded seeming to understand now and smiled, "Oh, a gardener. I get it now! Sure! I think there's a stand by the docks selling pieces of coral and seaweed to tourists. I think that might be your best bet. I can actually take you there if you want?"

"Wha- Oh nonono! T-There's no need for you to do that for me. If you could just give me directions Im sure I could find it just fine!," she insisted but flinched when another hand gently grabbed her own.

"I insist. To me I think you could really use a hand." She gave a small tug on Blue making her stumble with her first few steps being lead away through the crowd. 

"Oh uh- Ok?"

The lady pulled her towards the left and Blue winced at the crowd of people pushing against her as they pushed through the crowd. This just getting better and better didn't it? But now she was being lead through the crowd by a literal stranger who she just literally bumped into and now she was just letting her take her somewhere? God, what was wrong with her right now? They continued to push through the tightly nit crowd and she grimaced at the rubbing of others against her and the firm grip against her wrist pulling her onward and onward, before they turned right again and the two ladies were going up towards where the boats docked, she could tell because the sounds of the boat's horns were blaring louder, and the sounds of metal cargo crates being heaved around was loud enough to make her head hurt as well as the shouting of people and merchant boats. She could here lots of men and women shouting things like: "FRESH FISH!! GET YOUR FRESH LIVE FISH RIGHT HERE FOLKS!!" "CRABS!! LOBSTERS!! OYSTERS!! CLAMS!!! WE SELL THE MOST DELICIOUS CRUSTATIONS!! GAURENTEED BETTER TASTING THAN ANY FIVE STAR RESTURAUNT!!" "SEA SHELLS!! BEAUTIFUL SHELLS AND CORAL IN ALL SHAPES AND SIZES!! PERFECT FOR ANY HOME DECOR!!" "Hey you there! How about some imported fabrics all the way from Canada! Or maybe you're interested in buying some of there American chips! They're all the rage these days!" "Beautiful pearls gathered off the coast from real clams! Wouldn't these make a beautiful necklace for your lady?~" And so on and so forth. Honestly it was all quite annoying and honestly she was surprised she already didn't have a headache right now. If she could see maybe she would've been interested in getting any of these, but honestly she didn't care. What good was all these things to a blind person anyways? All she needed was nori seaweed. Just get the seaweed, and get it back home to her grandmother so she could grow the cuttings. That's all that mattered now. The lady still continued pulling her until she shifted and they stopped in front of a tall building unknowst to Blue, but she was glad when they stopped and the lady released her hand finally. 

"To the right here is a grocery store," she turned her head towards the store which people were going in and out of. "They buy and stock up some of the imported good that the fishermen sell here. Im sure if you're looking for any seaweed they wood have it here too."

Blue was currently rubbing where her wrist had been gripped but turned her head towards the constant jingling of a store bell ringing as people walked in and out with bags of food. "Oh. Really?"

The lady hummed a yes. "Sure is. My captain sometimes makes me buy his instant coffee here so I think it's safe to say it's a store." 

Blue 'looked' back towards her. "Oh. So you work as a boat skipper."

"Sorta. It's boat work anyways. Will you be alright by yorself, Ma'am?" 

"Oh y-yeah. I think I can get back out no problem." Blue gave her a polite smile. "It was very nice of you to help me though. Thank you."

The lady waved a hand. "No need to thank me, Miss. It's all in a day of a hero anyways."

Blue's antenna perked back up in surprise at her. "Oh! Im so sorry. I didn't realise you were one!"

"Nah. It's alright, and technically Im not a hero. A sidekick is the right word for what I do, but it's my job none the less to help out citizens when they need it. I was coming this way anyways to see my Captain about a report, so it wasn't any trouble at all," the lady assured her.

"Alright."...Blue bowed to her. "But thank you anyways. It might've taken me longer to find this if you didn't help me."

"It's all in a day's work, Miss. I have to be on my way now before the Captain wonders where I am."

"Yes." Blue leaned back up," And I should really just get the seaweed and get back home myself. It was nice to meet you."

"You too. Have a nice day, Ma'am."

Blue waved good bye as the lady turned on her heels and left. Leaving her in front of the store alone. Blue sighed and turned her head back towards the store she had lead her too and started forward towards the doorbell jingles. Well, can't say this has been a bad day so far. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

...Or so she thought.

[spicedddrum]

Hey Im fucking BACK

so. I love thinking about this kind of thing so I went a LITTLE hard when considering it.

First some notes- something I love about M9 and CR is the outfit details and keeping them to character.

M9 specifically seemed to do a really good job of keeping similar silhouettes across everyones looks. Calebs always got a trenchcoat scarf and tunic, beau always has a mid-riff, sleeveless overcoat and her Cobalt Soul sash, ETC

SO LETS LOOK AT MOLLY

He has his coat, a very important piece to him. I think Matt and Tal had already set up that this was a gift from someone important. I think Molly is sentimental about everyone he's ever loved and keeps things to remember them by. His other design elements are obviously circus-y. His jewelry is costume jewelry and his clothes are hand-me-downs from circus-folk.

Design wise he is VERY harlequin. Which i fucking love. SO. MUCH. he is the most beautiful and genuine clown.

Right now he's so young, only two years old really! any memories he has is leftover nightmares of some sort of flesh city. He's happy to forget whatever the fuck THATs about am embrace these new families he's found.

SO. HIS FIRST REDESIGN LOOK

I tried to keep the important details, open chested shirts are mentioned with him and lucien so its ESSENTIAL 👏 plus he needs some sort of skin showing to do his blood magic. The inconveniently tall boots are enough essential to his character. Even Kingsley has them.

He's kept the coat up to this point because it's important to him and he's worked so hard on it besides. He's also kept his circus leggings because theyre perfectly good and make his legs looks great why would he replace them?

Otherwise I focused mostly on mirroring Jester's second look. I think him and Jester would be terrible influences on eachother while shopping. I also bet that with new money and thieving friends he would finally get nice jewelry instead of cheap costume stuff.

I will admit i am fuzzy on the ENTIRE MIDDLE of the campaign but by the time they get their first updated art i believe theyve been to shadycreek which inevitably means more things about Lucien and the Tombtakers has surfaced. Molly is probably still fully in the boat of not wanting to know anything about any of that but I can almost guarantee beau would start digging in to those sore spots once they keep running in to more people who knew Lucien.

I think theyve also met Vess and been to Xorhaus by now?

Matt also mentioned that if what had happened hadn't he was interested in having Lucien be a reoccuring antagonist for them. I optimistically think this means Molly would be forced to have a face to face conversation with him at least once by now.

FINAL LOOK, AEOR RUINS

This is my favorite one I leaned a lot on fanon Lucien for this as well as taking a bit of inspo from BG3 fashion lmao

I tried to keep the important silhouette bits I mentioned before, open shirt, tall boots, long coat. BUT i think its unrealistic that that coat makes it to the end of their adventure without being TRASHED either over time or all at once. I think Molly would do his best to salvage fabric and ideas from it (sentimental bastard)

I think that even if everything had happened differently they still would have ended up in the Aeor ruins in the end. All roads led north as it were. In this AU Molly's had to either face Lucien and his reality physically and/or mentally. this is MY reality so i get to pick my favorite outcome which is that Molly sort of talks Lucien down and sort of absorbs those fragments of psychology back in to himself, experiencing his memories from a second hand POV in a way.

Sort of how Kingsley refers to molly and lucien as his siblings I think Molly would end up with a similar sort of affection and empathy for Lucien.

I don't think Molly wants to fully let go of his circus past, that's him for sure but I also think he's not trying so hard to run from Luci at this point, allowing some of his influence in to his look 😌

EDIT: ALSO. THANK YOU FOR THIS. I FEEL LIKE IVE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO ASK ME THIS FOR YEARS. I HAD SO MUCH FUN

Any ideas for potential Molly outfit changes we could have gotten?

lots actually. so many that i will be returning to this later in the day hopefully with sketches

[hirsheyskisses]

Hi Hiryur-san! I don't know why, I seem I'm fell in love with ur works when I saw it

Can I req luxiem members hc (or whoever you pick if you focused on fic) with ptsd s/o? I was stuck in this situation a while ago and need some comfort, ofc you can ignore this if you aren't comfortable. Thank you

❝...You're safe.❞ (PT. 1)

┆GN!Reader x Luxiem (Vox, Mysta, Luca)

┆┆Angst/Fluff (HCS/Short Fic??)

VOX AKUMA

Vox was, and is, by no means a genius. But, given his age, he knows enough to know what's happening. Seeing you trying to make yourself small as possible, seeming tied between moving away from him and running, or pressing yourself as close to him as possible.

The mall was.. definitely crowded. So much was happening, he couldn't even begin to fathom what might've triggered you. Could it have been the loud band playing? Maybe the play somewhere in the background? ..But what triggered it couldn't be the demon's concern right now. Vox had to get you away from these people and to a place of silence.

So where did he pick?

...A janitor closet.

His arm slipping around your shoulders, guiding you through the people, rubbing your back. "Shhh.. i'm here. You're safe with me, you'll be alright.." His lips were right up against your ear.

For a few long moments, you stayed like that. In his arms, hyperventilating. Vox was silent during that time- before beginning to talk softly. Hands running up and down your sides, keeping your head pressed against his chest. Only once before had he seen you like this: and, he had learned the easiest way to calm you was by talking. Giving you something positive to focus on- which currently meant Vox was- being, well, Vox. The voice demon. His voice soothing you slowly but surely.

After you had finally calmed down, Vox slowly began to kiss away your tears, hands cupping your face. "You're.. safe with me, darling."

MYSTA RIAS

Yeah.

Mysta was still getting to know you: having only recently begun dating, intimate and private knowledge was slowly being shared at a natural pace. Neither of you wanted to rush things- so when Mysta had invited you on the trip out on the water he didn't see anything wrong. It was a group get together with the boys and some of the girls, on a giant ass boat. When he noticed your jitters- he had assumed it would've been because of the fact there'd be so many people you had yet to meet in person. Because Mysta was a bit jittery, too.

But, he was quickly corrected, when it became clear with your deathly fear of the ocean.

Barely an hour in, Vox had been trying to convince you to get into the water. And you nearly did- but as Mysta watched you staring over the edge, he noticed it.

He noticed it, because your signs were the same as his own.

Which led to Mysta drawing you away to the cabin quick as humanly possible for him. "Heyy, darling, babe, light of my life-" he mumbled, hands on your shoulder as he stared into your terrified eyes. Heart aching, his arms wrapped around you and pulled you close to him. "Im.. sorry. Didn't know ye were- ahh." Your grip around him tightened, sobs becoming audible; and he'd never once felt more helpless in his life.

So he sank to his knees with you, inwardly panicking, hugging you close. Allowing you to cry on his shoulder as Mysta held you. Word weren't near enough- but through his touch, you felt safe. Grounded, in a way.

"I've got you, babe."

LUCA KANESHIRO

"...Sweetheart?"

Maybe it was a mistake. Bringing you with him. Sometimes it was easy for the mafia boss to forget you weren't like him: weren't used to blood and death and the trauma his targets caused, or went through.

He forgot you weren't supposed to be involved with the mafia.

So seeing you, white as a sheet, hands gripping Luca's arm to a painful point- he realized maybe allowing you to see such a bloody mess was a bad idea.

Anther thing: he knew nothing of your past. It had just never come up- you'd never spoken about much past who your family was and odd memories, and Luca never pried past that. It wasn't his business, and he had complete faith that you'd tell him any bad information when you were ready.

It clicked in his mind immediately what was happening. The terror in your eyes. A large, gloved hand gently grabbed your head and pulled you into Luca's chest, fingers massaging your head and other arm wrapping just under your waist, picking you up with ease.

He barked an order to his men, but it fell on deaf ears. Terror was overwhelming you; your fingers gripping his shirt and head buried into his chest. God, how did Luca handle this? That sight.. Oh god. You felt as though you were going to vomit.

Before you knew it, you were set on a couch, and Luca was knelt down in front of you, hands on your sides, and staring up at you with his signature smile. But worry glinted in his eyes, seeing your frozen body. Even though your eyes were angled at him, it was as though you couldn't even see Luca; your mind still lingering on the scene he had caused you to witness just moments before.

Which left the boss struggling, mind racing in desperate attempts to figure out how to distract you. "Hey. Sweetheart. Look at me, 'kay? There's nothin bad here- just me! Unless you, yknow, count that I'm a big and evil mafia boss.. Legend, super evil, scary, yknowww the stufff."

As you can tell, Luca resorted to trying to make you smile.

He continued to talk, fingers brushing up your arms, crouched in front of you, until he finally, after so long of talking, getting you to focus, focus on him, run your fingers through his hair, Luca got a smile out of you.

Eyes growing serious, yet filled with love..

"I've got you, okay babe? You're safe here."

A/N: Im really glad you like my writing!! Im not 100% sure if this is what you had in mind, or if i portrayed it correctly.. but i did my best! I kinda combined "short fic and headcanon" together.

I'll only do 3 characters a post-- but I'll do a part 2 with ike and shu soon! Hope you enjoy it :)

[jinxthequeergirl]

It wasn't all bad

Previously steve Harrington x reader Eddie Munson x reader

Summary: 🚩S4 spoilers🚩you where able to connect to the upsidedown through Visons but after some incidents at starcourt mall it left you sightless because of this you are left babysitting

Warning: poor writing cause this is the first thing im writing in months otherwise nothing...I think.

So This was meant to be part of a bigger Steve x reader turned Eddie x readef series i was planning but idk how well it'll do so i give you this small tidbit and if it does well who know i may write the whole series

~~~~~~~

It wasn't all bad.

You told yourself that constantly now.

You learned to live with it.

With the horrible truth that because of a gift you didn't want or ask for you where punished.

You still dreamt of that horrible moment. Trapped your own head with that thing as it took your vison.

It wasn't all bad. It was offten times beautiful.

You couldn't quite see people but instead figures and outlines of colors that made up the person in front of you. If they where close enough and you could almost make out a face.

Other times if you focused hard enough you could still go back to that black void and clearly see the scene infront of you. After Starcourt though that was to draining anymore.

It wasn't all bad.

You still had people who loved you and helped you.

You still had steve.

Though after summer he seemed to change and wanted something else but he would never tell you that. Until eventually the not telling you the truth got to be to much and you broke up with him.

It wasn't all bad.

"Why Don't you stay With Eddie this time?" Nancy suggested. "Are you serious? You want me to babysit while you guys go get to do all the fun cool stuff?"

"I wouldn't call it fun.." Robin muttered.

It wasn't all bad.

You kept repeating this to yourself over and over hoping some part of you believed it hoping it would stick. That it really wasn't. That your life wasn't constantly shattering piece after piece since that night ladt summer.

"C'mon Shes Got a point Y/n." You turned to steve in disbelief. "Steve Seriously?" Everyone went quiet, you could just barrelly make out their distored figured shifting uncomfortably infront of you. An aray of color you learned to identify as your friends.

"It would be easier to find Vecna If I came along you all know that!"

"Y/n we can't risk a repeat of last time if you try to find him. Who know wbat will happen to you this time."

"I don't have much else to lose Harrington." You snapped. "It's too dangerous!" He shot back. You bit the inside of your cheek, you knew exactly what he meant when it said it was "too dangerous"

"No..yea you guys are right...I'm just a liability I'll just get in the way of things."

"Y/n thats not what I said." You walked past him and the rest of the group back down the hill to the boat house. "You Didn't have too!"

You slammed the door shut slumping to the floor, you could hear the cars enginee start up and slowly fade out into the distance then it was all quiet for a moment.

It wasn't all bad.

"Hey...shouldn't you be out there ya know...kicking Vecnas ass.. Clearing my name?" You looked up in the direction of Eddies voice and offered him a simple smile.

The colors that made up Eddie in your mind wheren't something you where Quite used to.

Robin was a beautiful light blue, Nancy was a brilliant pink, Dustin a fun yellow, Steves was one that used to comfort you, a darker blue almost like how you remembered the night sky.

Eddies Was bright, loud, and warm. Red and orange swirling around eachother.

"The rest of the gangs got it." You said, he hummed and you watched the swirl of color move across you and slump beside you.

You could hear him drum his hands against his legs and make a popping sound with his mouth. "Soo...can I ask what happened to your...ya know...?"

You giggled slightly at his attempt to ask his question. "Remember those monster we told you about? The ones before Vecna?"

"Yea." He nodded.

"Well...I would get this like crazy vison from the monster, like I could see what the monster saw or where it was and I saw the people it hurt...eventually it caught me..."

"Shit..."

"Its not all bad though." You reassured.

"How so? I mean if it was me i would be pretty bummed. No offense!"

"I can still see somethings."

"Like what?"

"Well I can see you, kinda...I can see an outline of you and colors almost like...almost like your aura or someshit."

"Really!? What color am I?" You had both menuvered to face crisscross facing eachother to better engage in the convorsation.

He leaned forward excitedly anticipating your response. "Your kinda like...a fire..bright red and orange."

"Wicked..."

"See. Not all bad." You nudged him with your elbow."

You stayed together for hours talking about everything. You told him about your life gory details and all and he told you about his not so heroic or exciting life. You wished you could truly see him now instead of trying to match a face from freshman year of highschool.

It was now hours past the time Steve and the others had left you and you and eddie lied on the floor still talking half asleep.

"I'd like to hear your music sometime, I bet it's...metal as hell." You laughed at your poor attempt to say something cool your eyes half lided shut but you where happy to hear him laugh along.

"I'll be sure to make you a tape when this is all over." You hummed happily. He looked over at you seeing you dozing off beside him. He sat up quickly and pulled his jacket off and drapped it over you before laying back down beside you.

"Where have you been my whole life..." He muttered under his breath.

"I've always been here." You muttered back not opening your eyes. "Maybe you're the blind one Munson." He cracked a smile.

He swallowed thickly before speaking "Ya know when this whole thing is over we should-"

You sat up quickly. "Shhh shut up!" You snapped. "Ok well..."

"Eddie quiet!" Eddie finally zipped his lips you both turned to the window hearing noise from the main house. "Someones here!"

Eddie scrambled to the window to check and found Jason and his friends rummaging around outside. "Shhhit! Shit!"

"What!? Who is it!?"

"Our covers been blown!" He yelled in a hushed voice. He grabbed the walkie and began calling for back up from the others.

Radio silence. "Shit." Eddie went quiet again.

"Eddie? Eddie?"

"I've got an idea." He yanked the tarp off the boat and grabbed your arms pulling you up and helping you into the boat.

Your head began pounding and images crossed your mind. You could hear eddie paddeling and someone yelling in the distance.

You doubled over in pain holding your head.

"Y/n? Y/n? Hey..talk to me..." You felt eddie shaking your shoulder. "Keep rowing Eddie!" You yelled gripping your skull. "Shit."

"Stop saying that!"

"Freak get back here!" Jason yelled now closer than before. Images of a dark room and someone in the center of it flashed across your mind,along with images of boys swimming in the wated behind you. Everything was happening fast and all at once.

You cried out in pain before your entier surroundings changed and you stood in the dark room.

You panted heavily taking in the room. Familiar particals floated around in the air and slimy vines littered the floor. "No..no.."Eddie!? Eddie!!?..fuck..fuck...EDDIE!?" you you stopped screaming when you saw the thing in the center of the room.

You slowly stepped twoard it. The closer you got the more you made out what it was.

A human like creature, disgusting raw flesh slick and wet vines and arm attached to it suspending it in mid air.

You gulped as you stood beneath it staring up at its shut eyes. "Vecna..." As if he hear you his eyes snapped open and stared into yours. You yelped and fell backwards. Instead of hitting the floor you fell through darkness landing in water.

You coughed on impact. The previous room fading away and leaving you in a familiar dark void water covering the floor. You pushed yourself up on your elbows and above you a boy floated.

You stared in awe. "Hey!" You pushed yourself up slipping and splashing around as you did. "Hey!" You tried to reach him but as you moved twoard him you slowly sunk into the black water. You despretly tried to call to him. "Hey!! Wake up!"

But it was to late you watched the boys limbs snap in directions no human should bend, his jaw snap open in a perminate state of horror then his eyes...when they burts you let out an ear peircing scream and shut yours. Suddenly the darkness consumed your vison again and the water enveloped you. You couldn't breath or see anything you began to panic screaming and thrashing around.

Suddenly something gripped your waist. You let out another startled scream and tried to wriggle free but it tightened its grip on you and moved you through the water until you felt the cold air hit your face.

You still fought until you where dragged to shore. "Hey! hey! y/n! calm down! Clam down its me!" You finally proceeded what had pulled you from the water. Eddie cupped your face trying to ground you. You could just barrely make out the firey color of eddie infront of you.

"Eddie..." You lunged forward and hugged him. "God don't do that shit again man! I thought vecna got you!" He said gripping you tightly in his arms.

"What happened back there?" He asked.

You thought a moment, still playing back what you saw in your head as you tried to catch your breath.

Yea.

It wasn't all bad.