#im sick and tired of people using the excuse that “it's complicated” because it's genuinely not
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apollos-olives · 1 year ago
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honestly if you don't outwardly show support for palestine, i'm automatically assuming you're a zionist. no one has an excuse about being uneducated anymore. everyone who does not support us, either out of ignorance or genuine malice, is complicit in our genocide and i do not trust them at all. if you have not spoken out about what is happening, you are not, and were never, our ally.
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girlivealwaysbean · 1 month ago
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so tired of being a shitty bandaid for my parents' loneliness. like have u ever considered you passed your curse to me and some days i feel so lonely it's like i can't breathe around the emptiness in my chest????
#my dad is like#you can't just be in your room all the time then what's the point of you living here if ill be sitting here all alone then#and im like bhai what#mom also says this to me she always wanted to sit and rant and she used to say you never talk to me#both of these people don't even fucking get it that they're not even interested in me listening to me#mom just wants a sounding board for her venting and dad just wants someone to pretend everything is okay and happy all the time and#the only important things in life is the immediate present and food and making money and stuff#i swear this is why i feel so ????? about myself my identity like no i can't describe myself#because there is no myself there is just a white sheet of paper where people can write whatever they want#im so tired man#why can't they just go and live with each other and leave us kids out of it 😭🙏#like i genuinely am getting teary eyed about such a small thing but god. i want to have my own life so bad. im sick of feeling all these#complicated emotions guilt and anger and pity and obligation and duty like just god pls fuck off#people my age are so fucking mature and put together than me so confident so clear about their path#have friends partners breakups parties just so many new memories#and im just stuck.#and im fine with it now because i get it studying is really important and this is quite basic requirement to be perfect at#atleast my syllabus to survive in this industry#but then. let me do that only. please don't make me pretend to like you like spending time with you and everything#ive hated you for like. idk 14 whole years. since the first time you hit mom in front of me#i remember it so well like my childhood broke that day you slammed her into a wall for some stupid fight and her hair was all messy and#untied and you shouted so loud i thought surely everyone can hear. and then you left to roam around the city at night with your friends#i remember this because my mom and my sister sent me to check up on you with the excuse of a painting of a parrot that i had made#i didn't understand anything back then#but yeah fuck you fuck you fuck you for being so fucking delusional thinking i love you or something#ive prayed to god that you die and i still do#it would directly mean 4 people being happy#anyway#dni#this was meant to be fun and short lol fuck
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shyrose57 · 4 years ago
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2: At first? No. Ran was the first one who noticed when something was off but Ranbob brushed it off as him being tired. Though when he saw that his brother was still acting that way he kept checking in, til "Ranbob" eventually snapped at him one day, scaring and hurting Ran enough to get him to stop. His parents and Lias and Memi also noticed, but Lias and Memi didn't ask as often because Ran told them not too, and when Memi asked Ranbob gently told her its ok and to not worry. Lias was hesitant to accept this but eventually did, with Ranbob promising to tell him if something was wrong, a promise he sadly broke. Ranbob was close to his family, especially his younger siblings, and loved to play and study with them. He had a lot of friends at first that he played games with and joked around with. Though after he started to get out under more pressure and the introduction of Dream he got distant, lost all of his friends (even though he still cared for them), didn't play with Lias or Memi nearly as much, started skipping dinners and not talking to his parents or Ran. And when Dream was mostly and fully in control, he stopped talking at all, and ignored everyone. Lias desperately tried to get him to talk but that just resulted in a harsh stare with a silent promise, Memi tried to hug him, which he then pushed her away, and when Ran tried one last time to talk to him, but "Ranbob" just punched him and walked away. When his parents tried one very last time to intervene, that's when it got fatal. The Gladiators where horrified at what they read, finding it hard to believe and making them sick to their stomach. Benjamin caught them reading it, though he simply sadly smiled at them and said, "I read it too. Its horrible isn't it? He didn't deserve to go through that. But we'll help him. We'll help him be free and be himself again, I promise you, and everyone else. We'll save him." They felt like they where staring at a ghost, it was unnerving, to see such a happy and young Ranbob, knowing what will happen to him that will wipe him clean of all happiness. And it felt disrespectful when they caught sights of Ranya, Seth, Lias, and Memi. Cause they never knew them, and now they where looking into the such happy and gleeful eyes of dead people who don't know the torture their son and brother is going through. (And that went for everyone)
3: This is literally Ran's mentally when it comes to being stabbed, "I've been stabbed multiple times before and I haven't died. Therefor, I am immortal." Yes he is :). He gets threatened with Benjamin because if Benjamin finds out he isn't eating or sleeping Benjamin will force him to eat every bite of a full meal and force him to go to bed, sitting next to him and reading to him until he falls asleep. Which sounds nice, but considering Ranbob doesnt want to "bother" them, its a threat to him. Raq will always cause problems, he's a expert tracker and because of that he's able to hunt the groups down. He often will pop out of nowhere and attack the group, chasing them down until someone turns around and attacks him. Often Ran attacks him by looking Raq directly in his eyes, causing him to flee. Cause even though Raq wants to get Ran, he knows very well if they make eye contact he will lose a battle no matter what he does, so its best to run and attempt to blind him at a later point. Ran his very happy to be on the road again, and if Ranbob wasn't there (who's keeping Ran on edge and preventing him from fully enjoying the trip, though its mostly just Ran doing it to himself), he would be non-stop talking and running ahead of the group. But even with Ranbob there he's happy to finally be moving again. 
4: The gladiators did not witness it first hand, rather they heard screaming and went to check it out, worried and alarmed. And when Ranbob went into the depressive state did Benjamin come over to them and explain what was going on and what was going to happen. When then Jackie offered to help keep Ranbob company while Grievous and Watson offered to go along with Cletus to find Ran. When they heard the scream Jackie was scared and nervous, Grievous was anxious and on edge, Watson was calm yet curious, and Ran was mad and on edge. And when they found out what happened, Jackie felt bad and sympathetic, Grievous felt sad and a bit guilty, Watson was sympathetic and felt bad for him, and Ran was pissed. 
5: Isaac and Benjamin just kinda accepted it and went "Yes he is like a lost puppy and we love him for that.", Charles was embarrassed and instead of responding properly he muttered out an excuse and left, cause he was not expecting to be confronted with Ranbob being like a puppy at all and didn't know how to respond, and Cletus just stuck his tounge out and blew raspberries. And Ranbob was just purely embarrassed. 
6: Actually first thing Ranbob got when he arrived to the fishermen house was wrapped up in multiple fluffy blankets and had a hot chocolate shoved in his hands. Also whenever he goes into a depressive episode or wants to go back the fishermen just bring out emergency blankets and quickly make either hot chocolate or tea and Ranbob loves it every single time. 
7: Ranbob is mixed, he loves it being back as it reminds him of such good times, but it also doesn't feel right when Charles says it because Ran was the one who made it. It only sounds right when Ran says it. Ran is angry that Ranbob is letting someone else call him Bobby (which he is also sad about), but is also mad that he's mad that someone else is using it. But he's also happy its being used again, and is happy to see Ranbob still enjoys it. Grievous of course notices it, but doesnt look into it, and so does Watson but he also doesn't ask about it, determing it to be something the brothers themselves have to talk about. 
8:Because if it was Porkius or literally anyone else, they wouldn't of helped and would've watched happily as the two fought, waiting until one fell and even encouraging the fight. But they also jumped into the area from the stands and Cletus specifically placed himself between the two, pushing Ran back and yelling at him (which rarely anyone does) when Benjamin then came up to try to calm the raging enderman down, while Charles checked on Ranbob, and Isaac kept look out for any sudden movements between the two so he could intercept the potential attack. Plus when Isaac saw the other group approaching he ran to meet them, asking if they knew Ran and when they said yes, quickly stating a plan to safely restrain Ran long enough until Ranbob was taken to safety. Then leaving Ran to the group, but also saying how he wanted to talk later. 
10: Sounds like the certain town just may be the ruins of the Greater SMP. So I'll probably have Wilburs Decendent (which I dont currently have a name for, if anyone has one please feel free to suggest one!) As a popular performer there and also the towns historian, so when our groups get there Wilbur is able to provide information about Dream, Ranboo, basically everyone and the history of the SMP. Most likely going be a part of the story when Ran truly starts to slowly believe that his brother didn't meant to do everything he did. 
11: Yep, he knows Ranboo used to have bad memory (not how bad it was, just that it was bad) but he's never read it because Mizu never had the actual book, it was only told in tales and stories that Mizu had. If that makes sense. Ranbob will get plenty more hugs I promise you, though that also means he gets hurt more. 
12: Kinda but also cause I enjoy writing angst. 
Ok ok here's some fluff: These all take place a good week or 2 (or longer) after Ran forgives his brother and the relationship gets better. Watson walks in on the two sharing a blanket and sleeping against eachother. With them leaning on eachother and leaving almost no space between them. Ran finally calls Ranbob Bobby again and Ranbob cries and hugs his brother tightly, Ran is shocked but quickly hugs back just as tightly. Ranbob gets to finally pull a big brother move and tease Ran about his "nerdy" habit of reading so many books, Ran tries to fire back that Ranbob literally picked a idol that requires you to be a bookworm but he simply shoots back that Technoblade also requires you to be a bookworm. Its been spotted multiple times of either Ran or Ranbob having their tail wrapped around his brothers wrist or leg, and the two aren't very far apart now. Jackie jokes about being replaced by Ranbob and being heartbroken, basically draping himself over Ran and whining while everyone else laughs at Rans distress. Ran and Ranbob eventually agree to merge their two hauntings, which is extremely rare and is the biggest sign of trust and love there is in enderman language. Ran reads to Ranbob one night after a bad relapse, which ends up soothing Ranbob much sooner than anything else. 
I also have a more mythical idea of fluff that probably wont be in the main story, but im willing to share it if you want. 
2: Only his family noticed? Dang, okay. I’m irrationally attached to his siblings now that they have names, and this only hurts me. Do the gladiators have any noticeable changes in behavior towards Ranbob and Ran after reading it? Also, who may Ranya and Seth be? I don’t believe I saw them mentioned earlier.
3: Technically, he’s right. He hasn’t died yet, anon, and he’s been stabbed multiple times, he could very well be immortal. I guess he should probably do his best to not get stabbed again though, I hear it’s kind of bad for you. 
Ranbob: *Not doing something he should do for his own health*
Benjamin: *Self Care But As A Threat(Gently)*
Ranbob:
Ranbob: *Does it*
Also, even though I acknowledge that Raq could be a genuine threat, all I can imagine are Team Rocket shenanigans. He keeps trying to blind him in various, complicated ways, and fails hilariously. One time he actually manages to do it only for Jackie to take him out or for him to turn around and accidentally look Ranbob straight in the eyes cause the poor hybrid was trying to knock him out without a fight.
4: Yikes, that must have been pretty scary, just hearing everything go down. If I may ask, what exactly happened with Ranbob? You said there was screaming?
5: Well, at least everyone’s come to terms with it. Ran uses people as tote bags, and Ranbob is the local puppy, and it is what it is.
6: Very good! He needs it! Also, do they just keep them on hand? Just-he looks a tiny bit sad and Benjamin pulls blanket and tea out of thin air and burritos him. 
7: Aww. But also, ouch. Oh well. At least we can get Ran eventually picking the nickname up again.
8: Oh? Interesting. Sounds like these guys are pretty quick on their feet. I can see why it’d impress the gladiators.
10: That? Sounds so cool? Oh, I really like that honestly, I can’t wait to see where you take that.
11: Neat. Is that where he got the idea for his diary, or? And why? Why must we suffer in order to take comfort from the kinder things in life? Why can’t Ranbob just have hugs without pain? 
12: Did you genuinely just admit to aiming for my feelings with that last one?! Anon, how could you! I’ve been injured! My heart, Anon! 
13: AWWWW. To all of this. So fluffy, and cute! Just what we needed, thank you! Also, more fluff, you say? Please share, we need all the fluff we can get.
Have a good week, Brothers Anon, and thank you for the lovely fluff, and equally lovely pain. I’m excited for more!
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woomycritiques543 · 2 years ago
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(TW: MENTIONS OF SA AND ABUSE.)
True.
Even then, realisitically all relationships that unstable and unbalanced are doomed to fail.
Striker, in a sense, being portrayed as “wrong” for knowing this. When its a 100% fact that relationships like this never work out! You know why? You really want to know why?
Because Stolas and Blitzo’s is a abusive power dynamic! Where one is taking full advantage of the other, Theyre both taking advantage of each other physically and mentally. Its lust, not love, and this is shown with how Stolas treated Blitz as his “plaything” (in a bad sense!) since ep 2 and how he physically took advantage of Blitz being vulnerable in s2 and ep 2 by sexually touching him while he was having a anxiety attack/ptsd instead of comforting him.
Abuse never fucking works, at least not in a way where any true “love” between two people ever occurs because theyre hurting each other! Thats why. Nothing “natural” can become of that. (unless one gives a shit enough to actually try to change. Even then, how can you still have some be with the one who r^ped you? The bottom of the barrel? How can anything actually “consensual” or “love” become of that when they already betrayed all trust and did the worst possible thing to your body?) and im tired of people pretending as if this is a “natural” process within a relationship. When this is all obviously just extended sexual harassment and workplace abuse. Sam (yeah, the “she’s fucking mean” one who takes advantage of people irl.) semi-acknowledging this to give the illusion of “depth” in a sugar coated way. But then rooting for them to be together anyway so her and the rest of the staff can get off to the “sexy” toxic couple. Its disgusting, and im sick of the show sugar coating it as a “relationship thats deep and mushy with some complications instead of what it actually is: FUCKING SA AND ABUSE DISGUISED AS CONSENT AND “LOVE!” and the creators sexually getting off to Stolas and Blitz essentially r^^^ing each other with how Blitz is forced to have to keep fucking him to keep his job (ep 5 pretending as if he has a choice, when its obvious that he doesn’t as he ended up having to endure Stolas making sexual comments without his consent and the show just contradicted how he feels about his job in this episode to make it look like he doesn’t feel like he “needs” the book. When in every other episode, he does, and “has” (when no one fucking has to!) have sex with him to keep it.) regardless if he actually wants it and being sexually harassed constantly on top of it. Stolas being r^ped by Blitzo while he was drunk off of, factually, one of the strongest alcohols in the world (abnsinthe) and the scene portrayed it as “cute” and “hot”.
When in Add^t, the same kind of shit happens, and yet its only a “bad” thing if it happens to a character Vivziepop loves or whenever she wants pitty off of her audience for random characters. Using the trauma of the character against the audience to manipulate them into easily excusing or forgiving their actions with how the scenes are written. Or only taking SA seriously when it benefits whether she wants to get off to it or not. Its genuinely disgusting, and I wish people would stop pretending as if Blitzo and Stolas’s relationship have “average difficulties!“ when its clearly so much worse than that. Same for how they sugarcoated Octavia’s situation by pretending as if Stolas made a “little” mistake by arguing with Stella on the phone. When he outright forgot about Octavia- twice, both neglecting her to the point where she was able to run away and blaming it on Blitz, and taking his time with “flirting” with Blitzo instead of having the actual urgency to find her. The “small, slack giveable” mistake being used to excuse and easily forgive all of this and more.
I know that people will hate me saying this:
But its just Valentino and Angel Dust, but the interpretation is backwards. Thats it. Its just being shown positively instead of negatively. It’s that simple, and yet the show wants to pretend as if this is a “naturally” developing relationship. Disgusting.
Anybody like remember the fact that Striker knew how Blitzø felt and jabbed him in all of his weak spots as an imp, as a business owner, and even jabbed him in his relationship with Stolas? Remember how even if Striker didn’t truly respect Blitzø, and was keen on backstabbing him if need be, he was right about Stolas? You remember how in episode 6 Stolas literally confirms what Striker assumed? You remember how Stolas was throwing around underlying threats and asking for a thank you because he saved the supposed love of his life’s life? You remember how Blitzø’s just entire discomfort and exhaustion in that kiss scene where he escalated things when he knew exactly it would get him in the least amount of trouble with Stolas who single-handedly controls Blitzø’s business and can easily destroy it whenever he so pleases? You remember how they just had this entire sequence in episode 6 and 5, Blitzø dealing with all of these things and trying to handle his life and then just out of nowhere Stolas is suddenly lovesick and depressed because oh no Blitzø doesn’t love him back :(?
I remember. I remember all of this groundwork that was laid out for the two to actually struggle and develop natural feelings for each other and overcome what they’ve been through. I remember all of this shit that was given to us.
Would be a complete shame if e7, and the first two episodes of s2 just destroy all of this groundwork that is about as structurally sound as my mental stability.
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