#im not an opera gal so most of this is me going ''i see i understand! <- does not understand'' but i do think it INCREDIBLY fun that one of
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
My internet is back! *holds my downstairs neighbours like a cat that knocked over a potted plant* YOU!
anyway the second I realised my internet was fully back I immediately put on castlevania nocturne and there is so much I could say about it and if I had more energy I might but tldr
BAROQUE MUSIC
#HÄNDEL? AND PURCELL? in MY animated vampire show?!!! ITS FUCKING MORE LIKELY THAN U THINK HOLY SHIT#and mozart and monteverdi. i guess. also vivaldi.#im not an opera gal so most of this is me going ''i see i understand! <- does not understand'' but i do think it INCREDIBLY fun that one of#the main characters is singing slightly older music (händel n purcell) to contemporary music (mozart)(!)#like. Holy Shit My Dudes. this is enrichment for me in a place i didn't expect it! at all!#like do i expect mozart in my shows? no. is it surprising that hes there? also no. likewise do i expect vivaldi and his four seasons in#my shows? no. is it surprising to hear? Also No!#but something like Dido's Lament (which ive played and performed with a soprano) showing up when im not expecting it has me like !!!!!!!!!#dragonowlie's random texts#also. i am mentioning mozart here because he's famous and his works are prominent in nocturne but he is not baroque.#just in case my post made it seem that way. lmao. anyway goodnightttttttt
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hello, Venus! I would like to take part in your event, please! I'm a straight adult woman ☆★⬤◀
I'm kind and patient with everyone I held dear and ready to help with whatever I can (here are included family and very close friends). At the beginning I tend to be too formal and judgy with strangers, but I will slowly warm up when I get to know them better and they prove themselves to be good friends. I'm not sure if it's just me or a scorpio trait🤔 my big 3 are ♏sun, ♐asc and ♑ moon.
I'm that kind of person that has many acquaintances, but few friends. I enjoy going to watch ballet in my free time and secretly, when I get home, I LOVE to "practice" their moves in the mirror afshsjsbs. And one of the reasons I love going to the opera is that I get a chance to dress formal and I love to get the attention of others (and the fact that I am 6'2 is also a big plus)
Sometimes I doubt my own intelligence and I find it difficult to open up and reveal myself to others. And because of my independent and "first career then love" attitude I hardly attract guys :c I found out that I like mature ones- I wouldn't mind a huge age gap-, that love to dress causal formal (or at least would let me dress their wardrobe) and have a good sense of humour! And I wouldn't mind being put in my place from time to time🥴
I hope that's enough! Thanks for letting me take part in your event!
From that anon that asked about your eyebrows fhsjsdhs💓💓💓
cont.: I think I sent the wrong symbols, so I will write them again😅 You don't have to include them all if it's too much!☆⬥★⬤♪ (watersports, stalking, breeding, dubcon, noncon)
ohmygosh!! you sound delightful hehe... tall ladies like urself are always the sweetest to me!! im just a lil gal but all my lady friends are tall!! hehe dats unrelated but whatever... i felt as tho there was an obviously 'correct' answer for dis match 2!! mwah mwah!! <3
→ 𝗹𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗱!
𝗻𝗲𝘄 𝗺𝗮𝗶𝗹 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺: 𝘇𝗵𝗼𝗻𝗴𝗹𝗶! ←
'mature was the best word anyone could use to describe him. he'd been around for thousands of years, seen the rise and fall of many gods, and honed in on a million different skills lost to time. he was maturity in his essence and that's what struck you most about him. he has an aura of wisdom beyond your lifespan.'
between the constant rotation of life, Zhonglis existence stayed a constant for Liyue. you weren't one for idol worship so news of the archons death hadn't bothered you; it was an inconvenience at best. what did catch your eye, however, was the tall gentleman that you had been seeing around the harbour as of late. his presence overwhelmed you in the best way. he held the perfect air of mystery and dominance. so, when he asked to go for dinner with you after finding you purchased a vase he'd been eyeing, you were ecstatic.
he was much like what you had expected; knowledgeable and mature. he was exactly what you craved in a man. so to be able to accompany him on many more dates following had you falling fast.
consequently, you shouldn't have been surprised when his nature prevailed in the bedroom as well. most nights would end with you beneath him covered in one of his bodily fluids. Zhongli enjoyed seeing you revere him the way you never had when he was still the geo archon. to have you sucking needily at his cock or being pounded into the mattress was fulfilling not only romantically but also carnally. perhaps you'd become a bit of an obsession to him, he had been watching you for a number of years now, but to be able to have you crying over his dick as its balls deep in you was plenty of an apology for your lack of care before. he'd plant his seed and piss in you as often as he could from there on out.
'it was much like a deal with the devil. you stuck yourself on a hook and were pulled to the depths until the line snapped; not that you truly minded. is fate such a bad ending for the little bait that's loved by the beast?'
16 notes
·
View notes
Note
I've never watched dramas before, but your posts got me interested! I don't know where to start though :(
i got you! my masterlist of recs, if interested
first, where to find dramas w/ english subs legally (cough):
netflix has a good handful, and they’re gradually getting more and more! hulu will sometimes have some, but the collection is way better on netflix
viki.com hosts a lot of k(orean)dramas & some cdramas and t(aiwanese)dramas
iqyi hosts a lot of c(hinese)dramas
youtube actually has a lot of cdramas that are officially uploaded!
kdramas are typically 16, 1-hour eps , although this can vary. they air 2 eps a week. the vast majority of them are self-contained, meaning the story is completed in these 16 episodes/there’s no next season. this is slooowly changing, which i hate tbh
cdramas i’ve only started watching in the last year, but the episode lengths vary a lot, and it’s typical for 1-2 eps to air per day. longest one i’ve started was 72 eps (yeah lol i didnt finish it), shortest was 20. they’re usually 45-minute eps, and are notorious for having the opening/ending credits show scenes from the entire show so watch out for those #spoilers. most cdramas seem to be self-contained, but some can get sequel seasons
dramas encompass a huge, huge breadth of genres, topics, and stories. in addition to the standards (fantasy, romance, action, crime, etc.) these are some of the new/unknown genres that you might seen thrown out there:
sageuk = historical korean drama, typically centered on palace/emperor politics in the joseon era (usually the 1300-1400s)
makjang = kdrama that goes VERY soap opera. evil twins, amnesia, secret paternity, the works
melo = short for melodrama. SAD lol. also if you see a drama with “tragedy” as a genre it usually means at least 1 main character dies
wuxia = historical or historical fiction shows that feature martial artists/fighters of some capacity. you’ll see “pugilistic world” a lot in the summaries, which usually equals clans, sects, or schools of martial artists that are in competition with each other. often has “wire-fu” aka martial arts like in crouching tiger, hidden dragon/martial arts that are more superhuman
xianxia = similar to wuxia, but incorporates fantasy elements, most often from taoism, chinese folklore, chinese mythology, buddhism. often about cultivation/trying to reach immortality. expect lots of wafting flowers or hair and really bad CGI
bl = boy love. what it says on the tin, there
censored romance = code for lgbt+ stories that usually have been changed/adapted to “gals being pals” or “two bros sitting in a hot tub 6′ apart because they’re not gay.” “bromance” or “sismance” is sometimes a code for this, also
idol drama = stars a pop star in the main cast. a lot of people are snotty about these, but there’s a lot of good ones out there and good idol actors!
sls/second-lead syndrome = not a genre, but it means you’re rooting for the other dude in a love triangle who ultimately doesn’t get the girl. really common in kdrama, because it’s a trend (that is thankfully starting to fade out) for the main lead to be a jerk/tsundere type
drama recs under the cut
some dramas that i would say are “starter pack” dramas (note: i haven’t watched anything older than 2016ish so i don’t know the Classics, and i am DEFINITELY not well-versed in cdramas):
kdrama
goblin or guardian: the great and lonely god. urban fantasy, VERY popular, written by one of the more popular screenwriters, and stars a lot of big name korean actors. as far as i know, it’s what kickstarted a current trend of urban fantasy stories and a lot of other dramas after it make jokes/references to it
moon lovers: scarlet heart ryeo. im putting this one on here because it is SO MANY of my friend’s (and my!) first drama. time travel, politics, lots of shirtless beautiful men trying to kill each other. you know.
weightlifting fairy kim bok joo. i think this one is a great example of friends-to-lovers/cute slice of life dramas
reply series. three dramas that are “then and now” stories. reply 1997 is the first one, which jumps between a group of high school friends in 1997 and their lives in 2012--very similar to how i met your mother in premise but good. reply 1988 is often hailed as one of the best dramas, and while it has romance, it focuses more on a neighborhood and its residents--lots of family + friendship
flower of evil and signal for crime/thriller! flower of evil was definitely one of my favorite dramas this year. signal bored me if im being honest (and i dropped it), but it’s highly rated and a lot of people love it
my top 3 kdramas
mystic pop-up bar
chicago typewriter
welcome to waikiki
cdrama. lol i DO NOT feel qualified to answer this one. but some popular ones:
ashes of love. xianxia, insanely popular. it’s good! but i liked love and redemption a lot more for this type of storyline
the untamed is probably the most famous/highly rated cdrama i’ve seen out there. i haven’t watched it yet but it’s A LOT of people’s favorite/gateway to cdrama
my favorite cdramas, aside from love and redemption
le coup de foudre
goodbye my princess
the romance of tiger and rose
go ahead
sound of the desert
44 notes
·
View notes
Text
Cocoa and marshmallows
Iris cursed under her breath, as she made her way through the snowy streets of Ishgard towards Silke’s apartment. The midday was knocking on the door, as the women had finally left the Blacksoul manor. Silke had a day-off, true... but if she had left her apartment already, there would be no way Iris and Eva could find her from the city of size that Ishgard was.
The library, Jeweled Crozier, Second Circle... too many chances. Too many places to go looking from. All Iris could do was hope her friend had slept long, and was still at home. High stiletto heels knocked merrily against the stony walkway, as the two arrived to the apartment building. Silke’s small, lowly flat was located up on the third floor. “...The heckin’ stairs tend to be slippery at dis time o’ a day, Cinnabun... So watch yer heckin’ steps. I’m not gonna catch ya, if yer to fall and break yer neck, just sayin’.”
Iris looked up at a narrow stairway, leading up on the outer wall of the building, and with a sigh, she gathered up her long, black dress, and started making her way up, Eva following just couple of steps behind her. The morning had been warm, and the ice on the stairs had melted away, making their climb that much easier, and in no time, the two arrived onto Silke’s door.
Iris listened for a moment, trying to hear if anyone was home. The walls were like paper around here anyway, but she couldn’t pick up any noises. A lonely dog was barking somewhere in the distance. The voice was too deep to come out of Silke’s little puppy, Laurence. Giving a quick side-glance towards Eva, Iris knocked onto the door.
“‘Ey! Silkee! Blackbird, yer ‘ome?! It’s mi! Open tha door, mi ass is freezin’ ‘ere!! Silkeee! Darlin’!”
Silke flinched awake when she heard knocking on the door. “It wasn't me I swear!” she yelped stupidly, before realizing she had just been dreaming and she was in fact in her own apartment, alone. She rubbed her eyes and glanced at the clock. It was nearly midday. Cursing silently, Silke flung her blanket aside, stepped into her moogle slippers which had been waiting next to her bed and was already about to dash towards the door. Then she remembered she was wearing only tiny panties and black, short nightgown, which barely reached her buttocks and was made of some thin fabric that showed more than she would've wanted to.
The garment actually belonged to Lareine, or Iris, who had left it behind sometime. Silke had ended up wearing the thing after deciding to be effective and washing all of her laundry at once, before noticing she had mashed her both own nightgowns into washings and thus didn't have anything to wear during the night. Luckily her pink morning gown with brash turquoise carbuncle patterns hadn't been among the laundry, so she grabbed it from the sofa and wrapped it around her while hurrying towards the door. Her long, straight, ash black hair was messy but she couldn't have cared less. The damn thing was so thick and slippery it was a mission impossible to try and keep it braided during the night. She was equally indifferent about her dark circles. If someone hadn't seen dark circles by now then it was about bloody time.
“I'm poor and I'm not buying anything!” she announced at the same moment she flung the door open. A wide smile spread on Iris’ black lips as her friend opened the door, wearing her silly carbuncle morning gown and the fluffy moogle slippers. Even when not trying to, Silke looked dashing in Iris’ eyes. The mess of a black hair, like that of a demon from eastern tales just enhanced the effect.
“...And Im not sellin’ anythin’, mi star on da night sky!” She stepped up to the woman, wrapping her arms tightly around her, giving her a squeeze, and breathing in the familiar scent of ink and gunpowder... the scent of home.
“...Fockin’ ‘ell, I was afraid ya ‘ad left da buildin’ already! I missed ya, gal!” Iris released her friend, quickly fixing her round glasses, which the hug had tipped on the side, which together with her messy locks, made Silke look bit like she had just survived an explosion. “...I just ‘ave to tell ya everythin’! Ya wont believe whut’s ‘appenin’ back at tha manor... A major shitestorm. I guess... uhh... someone finally dropped a match onto the fockin’ barrel o’ gunpowder dats been sittin’ casually between Grumpy and Lucy... Oh...”
Iris stepped aside, giving some space to Eva, still standing behind her on the narrow stairway. “...Dis is... Evangelin’! I stumbled upon ‘er in tha church, ya know... She was comin’ to look for a goddess, and she found mi instead! Which... in tha end is not too far as a heckin’ outcome, or whut do ya dink? Aniway, we are kinda ‘avin’ a deal... Guess Grumpy is hirin’ her, so she can pay mi for company... ‘Er gal left ‘er to fock ‘round wid sum random lad somewhere, so I’m kinda ‘elpin’ ‘er to fock dat said gal outta ‘er head!”
Then she turned back to Evangeline. “Cinnabun, dis is Silke! Mi heckin’ fallen angel... Isn’t she just dashin’?” A sly smirk played on Iris’ lips, as she glanced towards Eva, before quickly moving her attention back to the viera at the door. “...Ya ‘ave dat tea of yer’s still, darlin’? Guess who’s been almost heckin’ sober for a month!” Iris was chattering up a storm. Though Evangeline hadn’t known her for long, she knew that this had to be unusual for the sarcastic, abrasive woman she had just met a few days ago. Around everyone else Iris painted over herself a veneer of prickly indifference that kept most, if not all, at arm’s length. Even Arsene, who she seemed to be most accustomed to, or at least the most comfortable with, was still held at quite the distance. This though... this was different. Evangeline couldn’t hope to compare to this. Iris was beaming, ecstatic to see this woman... a jumble of words exiting her mouth at neck-breaking speed.
She was almost tripping over her words trying to tell Silke anything and everything she possibly could. Somewhat dazed, Evangeline inspected Silke as Iris spoke, half-tuning out what the slight viera was saying. The woman in the doorway was undeniably adorable. She was clearly frazzled, having probably just woken up to the sound of someone at her door. She seemed bookish, from a combination of her round glasses which sat slightly askew on her nose, her frame, and what Eva could see of her dwelling... which seemed to be crammed wall-to-wall with literature.
This was about to be a long conversation... a visit between Iris, the woman who had Eva wrapped around her finger, and Silke, the woman with whom Iris seemed to be very much in love. At the thought of the word ‘love’ the little green monster struck at Evangeline’s stomach. Its spines were particularly sharp today... Eva didn’t know how much of this she could take. She tried to hide her pensive expression with a smile, waving slightly to Silke as Iris mentioned her name. Evangeline watched with mounting horror as Iris kept talking, though... explaining not only everything that had happened after the incident at the church, but also mentioning what exactly had happened during the incident... namely the carnal encounter the two of them had shared, and the fact that Eva was paying for Iris’ company. She supposed it had been foolish to hope that Iris wouldn’t delight in telling every living soul of their arrangement, but it was still painfully embarrassing. She looked at the ground, her face hot to the point that she thought she might be pressing it against an oven. She could barely extract words, but managed to anyways.
“G-good morning... p-pleased to make your acquaintance”, Evangeline was able to squeak, and accompanied it with a modest curtsy, hands gripping tightly at the skirts of her dress. She was unable to bring herself to meet eyes with Silke, instead choosing to inspect the steps upon which she was standing, waiting for her to laugh... or respond... somehow. Iris let out such a sudden flood of words that at first, Silke, who was still half asleep, couldn't do anything but stare her eyes wide and mouth slightly ajar. She clumsily patted Iris' back while she hugged her.
“Me? Nooo...”, Silke gave a laugh. “If I, for once, get to sleep late, then hells yeah that's what I'm gonna do. I wonder whose voidspawn's ingenious idea it was that everyone should get up while it's still dark? Purely idiotic, if you ask me. Messes up our natural circadian rhythm and probably causes a whole lot of heart attacks and such, geez...”
When Iris started to talk about the drama between Varg and Lucian, Silke couldn't help but lick her lips greedily. She was usually allergic to drama, but that certain one was like straight from some really bad soap opera. Silke had never truly understood people who were too interested in others' business and loved to gossip, but because of this one case she had perhaps started to understand them on some level.
Silke let out a frustrated sound. “You must tell me immediately if something happens, Iris”, she pleaded. “I'm having lots of exams coming up and I'm very very busy, but I'm still willing to halve my cramming time if it means I can witness the outcome. Make your way into my school if you have to, aight? Rather early, so we can grab some popcorn.”
When it was time for Iris' introduction of Evangeline, and description of what they had been doing together, Silke felt an unpleasant sting of jealousy. She had been so absorbed by the delicious news Iris had brought, that she hadn't paid much attention to the other viera until now. Evangeline seemed like complete opposite – at least externally – to Silke. She seemed somewhat older, her body was toned and her face radiated health. Her dark skin and flaming hair reminded Silke of a torch or pyre.
'And the most important thing, she wants to fock', a little voice in Silke's mind reminded.
Its goal had probably been to upset her, but instead of pushing it away like usual, Silke just let it linger there, agreeing with it. Indeed, this woman was able to give Iris what I can't, she thought to herself.
What in the world was going on in Iris' mind, though? Why was she telling her this? Silke was aware of Iris' occupation, but still this wasn't the kind of information one just blurted loudly around like that. Silke both hated and loved her imagination, which was able to paint pictures, like works of art rich in detail in her mind. It helped tremendously with studying. Though, in situations like this it burned some truly unwanted images on her retinas forever. Besides, now her neighbors knew as well. The other two could see very pale pink splotches appearing on her cheeks before they vanished almost instantly.
“That's... interesting?” Silke noted and nodded politely at Evangline, trying to shoo away the mental image while looking at her. Immediately Silke rebuked herself. Who the heck said 'interesting' after someone had been just describing in detail about their intercourse? Well... herself, apparently.
“I mean, um... nice”, she corrected, smiling – while hoping it didn't look too much like a grimace - and slapping her hands together. “I'm glad to hear you're having a good time with each other.”
Silke rebuked herself again. 'Nice' sounded even more awkward.
“Um... yes, I have tea”, she answered Iris, while stepping aside so that the other two could enter. “And cocoa too. Come in, come in. I want to hear more.” 'Oh. My. Gods', she thought. “Like, IN GENERAL.” Silke was acting weirdly, Iris thought to herself, as she stepped past her friend, letting her hand brush against Silke’s rear as she entered the house. Well, Silke was the type who usually acted weirdly, but this? Even for Silke, this would be considered weird. Iris had noticed the slight blush rising on her friend’s pale cheeks, yet fading away as quickly as it had appeared, like a dream you suddenly wake up from. Had it even been there?
Silke did blush, but in the end, it was very rare for the woman. Such thing sometimes occurred when Silke was angry and confused... or wanted to take something cute home. But right now? This was different. Was... Silke jealous? Silke? Jealous of her?
Well, if the situation was so, it was just as Iris had planned it in the first place! But why did she feel a sting in her heart? Like someone was pushing an icicle through it.
Pale viera walked up to the sofa, and threw herself down onto it, next to Laurence who rose his head, giving a quick glance at her, before curling up once again. Iris gave the dog a gentle rub behind his little orange ear. The shiba seemed like he had mostly forgiven what Iris had done back in the day, but still had some mistrust towards her.
“Ohh, cocoa would be just frickin’ lovely...”, she was about to add if Silke could top it with a sliver of rum, but realized it was not the best idea, after she had just told her friend about the month sober... Or well, sober was maybe not the right word to describe it, as Iris still drank. A month without drinking herself under the table, maybe?
All in all, Iris knew Silke never had alcohol at home. The ghostly viera had a bad habit to grab a bottle under stress, and that’s what Silke definitely had with her studies... Stress.
Iris followed Eva, as her companion walked in after her. Keeping her eyes locked onto woman, she gave a quick, meaningful nod towards the armchair, with a blue carbuncle plushie laying on its armrest. The icicle was digging its way into her heart, and having Eva sit down next to her on the sofa, would bring on the hammer, that would smash the icicle right through.
“...Its a fockin’ all out war back dere at tha manor soon, I tell ya...”, Iris started, crossing her legs, while still giving some affection to the shiba inu. The soft fur of the dog helped to ease her nerves a bit.
Keeping her eyes locked on Silke, working on her small kitchen of a kind, Iris went through everything that had happened. From Lucian finding her and Eva from the church, to their arrival into the manor, and from Varg possibly hiring Eva, to Arsene bringing in the hitman couple to guard the property.
“It’s a heckin’ powder keg back dere, sweetie... Dat ding only needs a fockin’ spark, and it’s gonna blow up, wipin’ tha city off tha map.” Iris’ black lips curled up into a devilish grin. “I’ll make sure to keep ya informed of every heckin’ turn, Blackbird... Because dis shite will end up to tha fireworks of a fockin’ lifetime, I tell ya... Blacksoul is pissed off like a heckin’ hog in a heat. Lucy’s gonna eat ‘is meals wid ‘is arsehole for a good while, if he’s to shows his fockin’ smug face in tha manor..” Evangeline ascended the stairs behind Iris, still trying to avert her eyes from Silke, who seemed to have ignored at least some of the comments entirely. She seemed so very different from Eva had thought she would be... in a lot of ways, Evangeline had pictured that Silke would be... much like Iris. Another rough-around-the-edges, prickly dancer that would have loved the opportunity to have a laugh with Iris over Eva’s embarrassment. Not someone who, for every intent and purpose, appeared to be a scholar.
And yet here they were, wandering into the home of someone who probably possessed more intelligence in her little finger than Evangeline had in her whole body. That was... an odd feeling... was she intimidated? Was this the sort of thing that Iris truly wanted? Scholarly discussions? Perhaps that was why Evangeline was so thoroughly bound to the often referred to position ‘second fiddle.’ What an odd sensation... she wasn’t used to feeling like this. Intimidation came in the form of combat prowess, no? Eva hadn’t felt intimidated by anyone in years... Even Andreas, the man who had swept Solenna away, hadn’t intimidated her. Over seven fulms tall... strong as an ox... but Eva had been sure that she could have placed his face squarely in the dirt had he come to fight her. This, though... this was different.
Eva entered the room, taking a seat in the armchair at Iris’ behest. Silke certainly liked... what were these things called... the little green aether pups that she had heard some of the other soldiers in her regiment discussing on occasion. Eva did think they were rather cute... but they must be difficult to hug, given that they weren’t... solid? Or were they? Evangeline looked to Silke again, standing there... damnably adorable still, in her half-awake state. She seemed to be waiting for something.
“Oh... um... tea, if you don’t mind. Thank you for inviting me into your home.”
She managed keeping her best straight face. Her eyes drifted across the bookshelves, packed with literature, with knowledge. Knowledge that Evangeline couldn’t hope to touch... not in a thousand years. She enjoyed reading her history books... but that was another thing entirely. It was just stories of battles and who won them and why. It wasn’t... whatever this was.
Study of aether...of magic, perhaps? That would explain the near ubiquitous presence of carbuncles throughout the apartment. Evangeline’s mind fell back through time for a moment though... to Iris in the church. Mentioning magic. Almost spitting as she did. She seemed so displeased by the practice at the time... so why would Silke be studying magic? Perhaps this was something different... chemistry... biology... who could guess?
“Wh-what is it... that you study, if you don’t mind me asking?” Stuttering again... damn. Why was this woman so intimidating?
Evangeline could hardly stand it, feeling this way. Stammering and stuttering around Iris was one thing... Eva had thought her a special case. She clenched her fists, looking around the room again to try and distract herself when... she saw… A puppy. An adorable little... Evangeline didn’t know the name of the breed... but it had a cute little pointed nose and triangular ears and orange fuzzy fur and it was laying next to Iris and it completely derailed Eva’s train of thought. She looked at it for a moment, sitting there and enjoying scritches from Iris, before blurting out the first thing that came back to her mind.
“C-can I pet your dog?”
Silke shivered slightly when Iris' hand touched her butt. The hells was she first bragging about her intercourses with Evangeline and then right after touching Silke's arse? Sure, Silke and Iris weren't in a relationship and Iris was free to do whatever and with whoever she wanted. Silke had already – bitterly – accepted it. But the thing that baffled her right now was that Iris just had to rub it in. Why? Silke couldn't even imagine being capable of doing something like that to the people she cared about the most. Silke had been having an impression there hadn't been any bad blood left between herself and Iris. Had she been wrong the whole time?
For a fleeting moment Silke felt an urge to yell 'You know what? Fock it!' and kick Iris out again. Maybe even speed up her departure with some carefully aimed lightning bolts. She got a hold of herself almost right away, though. She could never become a revered archmage if she behaved like some wretched punk or let her feelings get a grasp of her.
"Hot cocoa and tea - coming right up!" Silke announced after closing the door and turning around, smiling widely this time. The gesture was forced, perhaps, but at least she felt it wasn't as stiff as it had been earlier. She was getting good at this. Perhaps she should've become an actress instead. "I have whipped cream and marshmallows to put into cocoa, and milk and sugar for tea. Which one do you guys prefer, or would you rather drink your stuff completely without?"
"I'll take frickin' both, sweetheart!" Iris answered. "Like a heckin' mountain o' whipcream... and couple o' marshmallows... Whut ever ya wanna stick onto it, go for it."
"Milk and honey if you have it... or, um... milk and sugar if you don't. Thank you...", Evangeline scratched her jawline reservedly, immediately regretting requesting honey. It was a common food in Gridania, but probably was more of a delicacy in Ishgard.
At least Evangeline seemed like a civilized case, Silke thought. The dark viera didn't seem to enjoy the situation as much as Iris did, which meant she probably hadn't even known about Silke – or Iris' occupation for that matter – before she had agreed to... whatever they had going on right now. Silke had heard the saying 'opposites attract', but had never truly understood it. She still didn't. Silke had had many relationships with very different people than herself and all of them had ended into a catastrophe.
Silke filled a pot with fresh water and threw some firewood into the stove. A bright flame appeared from thin air just above her fingertip, and Silke blew it into the stove, igniting the firewood. While waiting for the water to boil she was digging her messy cabinet and trying to find the damn whipped cream and marshmallows. Meantime, Iris was explaining in more detail what had occurred lately. When Iris started to talk about the incident in the old church, something happened that felt like gods themselves would've decided to spit in Silke's face just for laughs.
She had found some godsdamned huge jar of jam from the cabinet, lifted it with her other hand, and noticed the marshmallows behind it. Keeping an eye on the water, listening to Iris repeating things Silke wouldn't have wanted to hear about, and trying to reach the marshmallow package from the cabinet that looked like an aftermath of some imperial mana bomb, had apparently been too much for her concentration to bear. Her grip slipped and the jar crashed into the sink, making a noise that was probably heard at the other side of the block of flats.
"Shiteberries!" she blurted with passion. "It's all good, no biggie!" she yelled towards the living room. "I've got it under control!"
The jar had broken into three huge chunks. Luckily there didn't seem to be any shards in the jam. 'I must save it!' was Silke's first thought after recovering from the worst wave of annoyance. 'One does not simply throw away food. No, no.'
"Black magic and summoning!" Silke yelled towards the living room again over the sound of boiling water, while grabbing an empty jar and starting to spoon the jam from the sink into it. "And pet ahead, if he lets you, miss Evangeline! He tends to be suspicious towards strangers and warms up slowly!"
Lucian had always given Silke the creeps. That was the main reason she liked to make fun of him. The things one feared tended to lose their power if one was able to make jokes of them. Despite Silke holding up her cheerful facade, and simultaneously containing her rage, a tiny glimmer of genuine amusement dug its way through it all while a mental image of the highborn elezen eating his meal with his arse had formed in Silke's mind. She bit her lip so that she wouldn't have laughed aloud.
"Thanks. Now I can't unsee that one either", she mumbled while spooning and having a race against time: how much jam could she save before it was all dripped down the sewer? “Isn’t she just a fockin’ dashiest piece o’ ass ya ‘ave ever seen?” Iris laid back onto the sofa, legs crossed and one hand rubbing Laurence’s neck. “If the gods are real, dey were fockin’ horny as a rat when dey made dat gal. And I bet dats why dey made her a heckin’ bookworm in tha first place. To keep ‘er all for demselves! Selfish fockers...”
Silke was still acting weird though, and it drove Iris crazy. She knew her friend well enough to tell when something was amiss, and now there definitely was something. Silke’s smile had been forced... faked even. It was the smile Silke had on her lips, when she was in a very unpleasant situation, and just wanted to get through it fast. Eva also, had started to act weird after entering the apartment. What was wrong with everyone today?
Deep inside, Iris noticed she started to regret bringing the two into the same room in the first place. What had started as a perfect plan in her head, had suddenly turned into a weird dream, where she was locked into an apartment with two beautiful women, who she... for different reasons cared for? Yet those women were but a couple of meatsuits, which some creature had possessed.
Iris wanted to wake up. Though, if she had truly been in a dream, a loud crash echoing from the kitchen at the halfway of her story would have waken her up.
“Yer okai back dere, Blackbird?!” Iris shouted towards the kitchen, after hearing Silke’s loud curse, startling Laurence from his sleep in the process. "It's all good, no biggie!" answered Silke’s voice almost instantly.
Iris gave a quick glance towards Evangeline, rising her brow with a shrug, and finished the story, finally getting up to the point where they had left the manor. Silke was still in the kitchen. The sound of a boiling water had rose to company the weird sound of scraping metal on metal. It seemed like Silke had no intention on moving the pot off the flames though.
“Fockin ‘ell, I’ll go see whut the fock is ‘appenin’ back dere... Dats not like ‘er... at all.”
Iris stepped past Evangeline, brushing her cheek with the back of her finger while going, and headed into a kitchen. The sight before her eyes made Iris’ jaw drop for a moment. Silke, scraping jam out of the sink like her life depended on it, and a teapot, boiling over on the stove, sending steaming hot water down on the flames with an angry hissing that sounded like a pit of snakes.
“What tha fock, Silke?!” Iris finally blurted out, as she got back her voice all of the sudden. She rushed to the stove, moving the pot off the flames, but while doing so, her hand slipped on the handle, sending the lid flying off and spilling boiling hot water onto her arm. “Shiteclippers! Fockin’ ghhh...”, her curse turned into a shriek, but she still somehow managed to place the pot onto the table.
Her arm was on fire, and the pale white skin had started to gain pinkish tint and couple of blisters where the water had hit. “Silke, whut the ‘ell is wrong wid ya, sweetheart?! Ya did not get ani water on ya, did ya?!” With the heat still radiating up on her arm, like thousand little needles, Iris took a grip of Silke’s shoulders, turning the woman around, and wrapping arms around her.
With Silke’s affirmation, Evangeline slowly approached the cute little dog and extended her hand to him, hoping he would be okay with her lightly scratching behind his ear. She was as gentle as she could be, carefully extending her digits towards his nose, when a loud crash from the kitchen caused her to start, feeling like she jumped almost a yalm into the air. Her heart rate picked up and she looked around, hoping for something weapon-adjacent to be present in the room somewhere. She settled on the poker by the fireplace, reaching for it slowly, when Iris shouted back to her, seemingly unperturbed by what could’ve been the shattering of a window.
“It’s all good, no biggie!” Silke’s voice sounded off from the kitchen.
Evangeline relaxed slightly, a bit less worried of an intruder now. She wondered how Iris could be so blase-faire about the whole deal, given that she seemed to have more than a few people that would happily see her dead. Iris finished her story regardless, wrapping it up and muttering, “Fockin ‘ell, I’ll go see whut the fock is ‘appenin’ back dere... Dats not like ‘er..at all.”
As she walked past Evangeline, heading towards the kitchen, she brushed the dark skinned viera’s cheek as she passed, causing her heart rate to quicken once more. Evangeline sighed and went to turn her attention back to the dog, when she heard further exclamations from the kitchen, followed by a shriek from Iris. Before Eva could think about what she was doing, she was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, poker in hand, just in time to see Iris throw her arms around Silke.
The pot on the table filled with still-bubbling water and the splash on the ground told the story of what had happened, though. Though Evangeline’s emotions battled in her mind, coming to a head in the face of the two women embracing, it was as if someone had flipped the switch in her head, finally, that said ‘high pressure situation’.
Her emotions dulled, and the world grew grey around her, as her body took over. She took the pot, placing it on a potholder with ease, to ensure that the table wouldn’t burn. Placing the poker in the corner, she moved to Iris, who she assumed was the most injured. Stepping around the two, Evangeline assessed for injuries, quickly noticing the blisters rising on Iris’ forearm and asked: “Silke, do you know how to dress a wound?”
"The hells would I know? Do I look like some damn white mage?" Silke cried out, sounding both frustrated and shocked, but still clearly more of the former.
“Right... very well. I know little of burns, but I will go find someone who does. Run cold water over the burn, and I’ll go find an apothecary for proper bandages and whatever else we need. There is one near here, isn’t there?”
Evangeline stepped back from the two. She didn’t touch Iris. She didn’t touch either of them. It wasn’t like Iris wanted her here, anyways... this was all she could do. Perhaps she could be useful, and the two could be left to themselves. At Silke’s response, she turned and walked from the room, out the door and into the chilly Ishgardian air. Silke twitched slightly when Iris hugged her, but she still wrapped her arms timidly around her, shocked that Iris had just gotten boiling water on her. Silke wasn't squeezing like Iris did, though. The heck was she getting all close and personal so suddenly?
"What's wrong you ask, princess?" Silke repeated, slightly aghast. "Everything was just fine before you came and started throwing the pot around! I accidentally dropped some godsdamned jar, which appeared to be heavier than it first seemed, into the sink. I would've taken care of the pot in a moment! ...And... no, I didn't get any water on me", she added a bit more calmly, when they let go of each other.
Then Evangeline, too, arrived into the kitchen. These two dumbasses were like some damn knights trying to save a damsel in distress, Silke thought sourly. While Evangeline was examining Iris' burns, Silke stared at the two, gritting her teeth. There she was again, with her older and more mature companion, who - without a doubt - already had some renowned career behind her.
Silke took a quick glance at herself; her carbuncle morning gown and moogle slippers. Were they the reasons everyone insisted treating her like a child? Because she liked cute things? Or was it something in herself? Something about her behavior, perhaps? Her absent-mindedness? The farther she got with her studies the more sceptical people seemed to be about her fending. First Asagi, then Silke's school'mates', and now even Iris.
When Evangeline asked did Silke know anything about taking care of wounds, she couldn't help but cry out: "The hells would I know? Do I look like some damn white mage?"
She could put a bandage on paper cut but that was pretty much it. The yell had already left her lips before Silke remembered she had just made herself a promise to be more sophisticated and controlled. Before she got her mouth open again, Evangeline was already on her way and had stepped outside.
Silke stared at the door for a while. At least Evangeline had had a good reason to go, but it also annoyed Silke, that every single time, when she and Iris were spending time with other people than each other, Asagi or Arsene – which was very rare – sooner or later their company vanished somewhere, leaving Silke and Iris alone. Why, why did it always happen? Of course Silke enjoyed spending time with Iris, but she was also craving other friends. She didn't want to be depending on only one person. Yet it was either her or Iris - or worse, both of them - who managed to drive away other people. As Eva had left the building, Iris looked at the blisters on her aching arm, and walked up to the sink. What was left of the jam, was now lazily making its way down the hole. It was unlikely that cold water would do any good at this point, but Iris opened the tap anyway, letting the ice cold water run for a while, washing away the jam, before sticking her arm under it, grimacing.
“Yeah, guess I heckin’ overreacted. The damn pot was throwin’ water around like a frickin’ volcano, and I freaked out, as I thought it boild over onto ya...” Iris looked at her arm, still holding it under the running water. It was not looking pretty, but could have been worse. Maybe it could heal without leaving a scar.
“Just look at mi, Blackbird. I keep destroyin’ thin’s, no matter whut I do. For fock’s sake, I hated mi mother, for being a damn useless wreck she was. And now? Shite. Its almost like tha heckin’ apple surely wont fall far from da tree...”, she gave a quick glance towards her friend, before closing the tap, and carefully drying her onto a towel. “...I’m heckin’ joyful yer alright though. Dink we could still make dat cocoa?” Iris walked up to the pot, peeking inside it, and coming to the conclusion it was still half-full of water. Maybe it would do for three smaller cups.
The burning pain on the arm started to return soon after she had dried it up, but, biting hardly onto her lip, she more or less successfully hided the fact from Silke. “Sssshite...”, viera hissed under her breath, feeling like someone had been spanking her arm with a bunch of nettles for an hour straight.
Years back, when she was still living on the streets of Limsa Lominsa, the guards had caught her from pickpocketing, and rolled her in a huge bush of nettle for it. The feeling on her arm, brought the old memory to life in her head.
“...W..Whut ya gonna drink, Blackbird? Tea maybe? C... Could s...share a cocoa wid ya too... Ya know whut dey ‘ave in dose fancy heckin’ restaurants... Dose straws dat go whirly around each other, and ya can share a drink all heckin’ romantically and shite. We could get one of dose. ‘Aight?”
This was one of those moments Silke found herself once again wondering: how the hells did Iris do it? At one moment she was all sweet and thoughtful, then a couple of minutes later a complete arsehat. And then a moment later sweet again, and so on. Or perhaps the most important question was: why? And which one was the real one?
"I'd rather drink all of my cocoa by myself", Silke explained after a short pause, with a hint of formality in her voice. "I should probably start drinking from a barrel or something anyway, since regular mugs or glasses seem to contain way too little for my tastes."
“Well...”, Iris shrugged, knocking the pot with her fingernail. “Dis thin’ is ‘alf empty, so wont fill a barrel wid dis, but... We should all still get a heckin’ mugful...”
Iris’ voice lacked the energy it had a moment ago, suddenly sounding rather tired. Her gaze traveled in the room, from the door, to the flames still dancing on the stove, and to a carbuncle clock, hanging on the wall. She could not look Silke in the eyes. She very well knew she had once again let down the woman she loved. And that love burned in her chest, hotter than the flames on the stove... harder to ignore than the burning sensation on her arm. Yet why was it she could only bring misery into Silke’s life? Time after time after time.
“...I’m gonna find dat whipcream and candies, if ya mix tha cocoa, okai..?” she finally sighed, moving up to the cabinet, starting to go through the foodstuff Silke had stored. Soon she pulled out a small back of marshmallows, waving it in the air, in front of Silke’s eyes. “Lookie-look whut I found! Lets just stack a mad pile of dese onto tha whipcream! It will be fockin’ beautiful... Like a heckin’ tiny snow castle... ‘Aight?”
*** Evangeline walked briskly down the steps, her goal clear in her mind. A chill sat in the air, the same that seemed to sit permanently in Ishgard, regardless of the time of year. Eva could see her breath, just barely, a vaporous cloud that was constantly being remade and dispersed as she exhaled and strode through it. She wore a wry smile, unsure of what exactly she should be feeling right now. She had time to walk, time to herself, time with her own thoughts. Though this, to her, felt like a punishment worse than death, perhaps she could straighten this whole thing out in her head. Find out where she stood. What she should do next.
Very well... let’s look at the facts, she thought, releasing a sigh inwardly.
Fact: Iris and I just met. We have formed an odd sort of arrangement that has her spending time with me for compensation.
Fact: Iris and I slept together. I enjoyed it and she seemed to enjoy it. Evangeline moved slightly out of the way, angling her body to the side so that she could fit between a merchant’s stand and a heavyset man that was moving in the other direction.
Fact: I pulled Iris from a breakdown. She seems to struggle with another personality of some kind. She seemed expectant that I would leave after finding that out. I did not. Also, she fell asleep in my arms. It doesn’t seem like the sort of thing she usually does. She wiped her nose. It must surely be red at this point, with how chilly it was outside.
Fact: She has shown some level of interest in me. She dreaded stating this next one to herself.
Fact: I have... fallen for Iris. Against my better judgement in every way. She has a pull over me that I haven’t truly experienced before, and I can’t fight it.
F-fact... Iris... I-Iris is in l-love... with S-Silke.
That thought was what did it. That was the one that set the tears flowing. Eva kept walking, her goal still clear in her mind, but with tears pouring down her cheeks. How had she done this to herself... jumped straight from one failing relationship into another one. She had left Solenna... sweet, wonderful Solenna...for this? A pale, thin viera woman... so thin that she seemed malnourished... who could barely manage to give her the time of day if she asked?
And on top of all of that... she was so clearly in love with Silke. The woman was all over her! Iris did nothing but praise Silke... her perfect little angel. The apple of her eye. This begged the question, though... why weren’t the two of them together? Was it Iris? Her refusal to be tied down? Or was there something about Silke that Evangeline didn’t know…? There’s no way...no way Iris wouldn’t have said something. She must have confessed her feelings to Silke.
Evangeline turned a corner, tears still stinging at her face. She wiped at her nose again, and then her eyes, wiping them first and then rubbing at them, hoping that she didn’t look to be too much of a mess. She sniffled, and continued walking, seeing the Apothecary’s sign in the distance. Perhaps she should just excuse herself, and return to the manor. Maybe the two of them wanted time alone.
But... if that was the case, why had Iris invited her? She had seemed fairly eager to bring Eva along... despite her outburst in the bathroom. It was just... so damnably confusing. Did Iris want her? Did Iris not want her? Was she a substitute for Silke? Or was she something different?
All of these questions went unanswered, though, as Evangeline stepped through the door to the Apothecary. She must have looked quite the sight, 6 fulms, 2 ilms of musclebound viera, ducking under the doorway to keep room enough for her ears as she did. Flushed from the cold, tears clinging to her cheeks... not something you would normally see on the streets of Ishgard. She stepped up to the shopkeeper, clearing her throat.
“G-good morning…”, she sniffled again, wiping at her nose. “Do you have anything that would help with a burn? And some clean bandages?”
The merchant, a rather young looking miqo'te man, took a moment to first absorb the sight of Evangeline, and then another to process what she was asking for.
“Uhm... er.. .y-yes. The aloe lotion, over in the corner on the second highest shelf. And we have bandages right here at the counter. Just... apply the lotion, it should help with the pain. Wrap it in bandages, and change them every four hours. You’ll probably want to reapply the lotion when you change them.”
Evangeline nodded in thanks, and efficiently collected her goods, paying for them with gil from a small pouch she kept tied around her waist. She took her leave, waving at the young man, who looked as if he wanted to say something as she was leaving, but decided not to.
She exited the shop, back into the cold air. It was starting to feel a bit more punishing, and Eva could see a few snowflakes starting to dot the sky in the distance. She would be back soon. She almost wanted to drop off the bandages and then leave, but... maybe she should stay a little bit. See how things played out. Maybe she could get a little bit more understanding of the situation... because she refused to let go of Iris without being sure she wasn’t wanted. She kept moving forward, upset, angry, sad, and tired...but a bit more determined than she had been a few minutes ago.
***
Silke gave Iris a small nod, before grabbing a pouch of cocoa powder and starting to spoon it into the cups. She was working near the small kitchen window, glancing at the gray inner court every now and then, and her back turned to Iris.
Overall Silke saw herself as a positive person. She didn't truly hate anything, although she often joked about it. Hate was such a powerful word. But if someone had asked her to point just one thing she could say she truly hated, it would've been mixed signals, messing with her. Most people tended to mess with her in one way or another, and at least with her inner circle Silke wanted to feel safe enough to lower her defenses. Keeping them up constantly was tiring and it ate her from the inside.
'It was supposed to be over', she thought. 'We had our misunderstandings and arguments, we overcame them and we were just fine. Why did she have to continue it? She could've done her thing with Evangeline, heck, even bring her here. But why rub it in? I'm too tired for this shite.'
When Iris found the marshmallows and said they'd make the cocoa toppings like a snow castle, Silke felt tears trying to come out. Stubbornly she pushed them back while biting her lip, before glancing at Iris over her shoulder, smiling and agreeing lightly:
"Sounds fancy. Just the thought of it makes me almost feel our blood vessels blocking up." She turned around and started to stir the drinks. "But still, oh, so delicious. Why must everything unhealthy be so delicious?"
Silke glanced outside again, towards the gray sky. After the exams of this month were over, the students could choose a place to go study more how things worked in practice. So far they had been mostly studying theory of all general subjects, and only doing some smaller and safer experiments while their teachers had been watching them closely. Now was the time for action, and the beginning of specialized studies. Silke was about to dive into the studies of a battle mage and destructive alchemy. She pondered to herself which post could possibly be the farthest one away from Ishgard. “Why? Because tha world is a heckin’ unfair place, Blackbird”, Iris said. “In a damn perfect world, we would be livin’ in a frickin’ castle somewhere in tha mountains. ‘Ave a damn barrel o’ cocoa, a bath’ouse and a fockin’ basement full o’ blastin’ powder and booze to play wid.”
Iris rolled a single marshmallow between her fingers, squeezing it down, and watching it slowly buff back up, as she loosened her grip. “...Yet ‘ere we are. In a fockin’ apartment flat, in a city filled with damn arseplucks who dont get us. Like fockin’ birds in a cage...”, she flipped the candy into her mouth, turning to Silke, who was still working with her cocoa mix.
Silke was so beautiful. In her own, rather curious way, she was stunning. After a while, Iris caught herself staring at her friend, the marshmallow still lingering on her tongue. Viera shook her head, picking up another candy from the bag, and reaching it towards Silke, holding it an inch away from woman’s lips. Silke’s spoon stopped moving, and she placed it down on the table. Carefully, she took the candy from Iris, holding it for a moment, and placing it into her mouth.
Oh, how much Iris had hoped for the woman to pick the candy from her fingers, using her lips. She had almost seen it happening in her mind, but then again... Silke would never do such a thing. What was she even thinking? Most likely nothing. The tears were burning her eyes, almost masking away the burning sensation on her arm, but she kept them in, flipping another candy into her mouth. She missed though, the soft candy hitting her on the cheek, and falling onto the table.
“...I’m workin’ mi fockin’ ass off to make sum cash. It’s... gonna take some time, as yer sissie has cut mi shifts to ‘alf lately, but... I’m gettin’ dere, Silke... And... And when I ‘ave got sum savin’s, I thought I could... Ya know... Get sum own place sumwhere, and I thought...” A sound of door opening interrupted Iris in the middle of the sentence, and she hissed a curse under her breath. “...We are in tha fockin’ kitchen, Evangelin’!” she shouted towards the doorway, her long, sickly fingers gripping the bag of marshmallows spasmodically. Evangeline slid the door open, a paper bag of medical supplies clutched in her hand. She had tried to wipe at her eyes and her nose as much as possible, and though she had cleared them both (or so she thought) she could only assume that her smudged eyeliner and her most likely running mascara would display that she had been crying. She supposed that she would deal with that when the time came-for now, at least, she wanted to focus on the task at hand. Iris’ arm needed to be bandaged... she must be in incredible pain right now. Eva’s feelings could wait.
She startled at the sound of Iris’ shout. She seemed upset... which stood to reason with a burned arm. Eva stepped briskly into the kitchen, noting the two vieras seemed to be casually conversing. Iris must have an impressive pain tolerance... ran through her head as she saw how Iris was standing. When she met Iris’ eyes, though, she was a bit taken aback by the other woman’s expression.
Had Eva done something wrong? Offended her somehow? She shook her head, trying to clear out the stray thoughts. That would be a question for later…
Evangeline moved to the sink, excusing herself as she moved past Silke, and washed her hands. Water, soap, water, towel. She picked up the bag from the side of the sink, wandering over to Iris and removing a roll of bandages, a roll of medical tape, and a small metal container from the bag. She gestured to Iris to show her arm.
“We need to put this cream on your arm. It will calm the burn and lessen the pain. Then we wrap it in this bandage, and change it every four hours until it’s not causing you as much pain. Would you like to sit down so I can get it wrapped up?” Evangeline looked at Iris and gave the brightest smile she could muster. “I’m fine, Evangelin’! It’s just a heckin’ small burn... Will... ‘eal on its own by the damn mornin’...”, Iris looked at her burned arm, which was visibly shaking, like dead leaves in a breeze. She felt the burn, like it was creeping into her bones. On top of that, the arm had started to ache, sending arrows of pain up towards elbow, and down to her fingers, still holding onto the bag of marshmallows.
“...Fockin’ ‘ell, fine! Do whut ya wish... But change every fourth ‘our, ya say? Ya ‘ear dat, Silke? Yer gonna come over to sleep wid mi, and change mi bandages, and kiss da pain awai, hm?” Iris took one more candy out of the bag, before placing the back on the table, right next to Silke, and making her way to a tiny dinner table, which was loaded with books on a dangerously unsteady pile. Viera sat down onto the chair, placing her elbow onto the table, so her arm was hanging on air. “...Do ya mind, if I smoke, darlin?” Why in the seven hells does she keep talking about 'us', Silke thought, stirring the cocoas even more furiously, although the powder had dissolved into the drinks ages ago. Iris was truly hopeless. Silke had explained to her in words of one syllable why it just wouldn't work, and how it would only cause them both more pain. And despite it all here they were again. Should she draw some godsdamned diagram about it next? It probably wouldn't work either. Iris' skull was apparently too thick for receiving information.
Silke felt, oddly enough, somewhat relieved when she heard the door in the hallway and realized Evangeline had returned. At least now she wouldn't have to listen to all this sweet talk, which made Silke remember all the good moments she and Iris had had together, and which were now like acid poured into her reopened wounds. She grabbed the whipped cream container from the table and squeezed so much cream into every mug, that the cocoas ended up looking like soft ice served in mugs.
Meanwhile Evangeline was tending Iris, Silke took one of the mugs and sat on the other side of the table, opposite the two others. She was observing them closely, while poking her spoon into the cream, taking a full load of hot cocoa and cream, poked it into her mouth, into the cream again and so on. Silke noticed Evangeline's reddish eyes. She had probably been crying. Silke had had somewhat mixed feelings towards her, but right now she was mainly feeling sorry for her. Iris was probably just playing with them both.
Silke couldn't help but frown at Iris' comment. For a moment she froze to stare at her in disbelief. 'Are you focking kidding me?!' she was tempted to ask, and to slam her mug onto the table with full force to give her words some more spice. Then she noticed the mug was one of her favorites: a pink one, that had two black eyes, a snout and a little pigtail on the other side of it. She quickly let go of it, and yanked her shaking hand into her lap.
"I'm not going anywhere", she announced in a steady voice. "I have places to be tomorrow morning. And I doubt you need me to tend you, Iris. I'm sure your other hand is working just fine, and you can do it yourself." She scooped a couple of spoonfuls of whipped cream into her mouth, before adding: "No smoking allowed indoors, they say. The stench gets absorbed into the structures. And if they'll find something to complain about this apartment when I'm about to move, guess who gets to pay the expenses?" “Fine... No smokin’ indoors...”, Iris stuffed the pack of cigarettes back into her pocket with her free hand.
She glanced towards Eva, seeing woman’s red eyes and smeared eyeliner. Of course Eva had been crying. ‘What else I do these days than make people cry?’ Iris thought to herself.
Her gaze traveled from Eva to Silke, sitting on the other side of the table with her pink piggie-mug. Her dearest friend. The girl she loved... the only girl she had ever truly loved... sat there, so distant. Acting almost like she did not even know Iris anymore. There was no snow castle of mashmallows on her mountain of whipcream... And that’s when the storm that had been raging inside Iris broke the dam. She coiled forward on the bench, as the tears started running down freely on her pale cheeks. Dripping onto the burn, like a salty summer rain. Evangeline had been doing rather impressively at holding herself together, she had thought. As she applied the cream very gently to Iris’ arm, she quietly listened to the other two talk. Iris doing her level best to whisper sweet nothings to Silke with a megaphone, and Silke seeming... cold. She sounded even less inclined to put up with Iris than when they had walked in the door.
Iris put away her cigarettes at Silke’s behest, and, with a quick glance around the room, seemed to finally give way to the tension that had been building in her this whole time. She huddled over and burst into tears. Evangeline looked up, shaken by the sudden change in mood, and turned her eyes to Silke, ‘what do I do?’ written across her face.
Silke’s eyes, at first, were locked on Iris, seeming shocked by the outburst. They glazed over with sadness for just a moment... so quickly that Evangeline would have missed it, had she not been searching desperately for an answer on the viera’s bespectacled face. The sadness faded, though, as quickly as it had come. She retained control of herself, and took another drink of cocoa, faster now than she had before.
“Ahh...I-Iris…”, Evangeline said, unsure of how to handle the situation given her companion’s preferences. Iris had specifically said that she didn’t want to be hugged. She didn’t want that kind of relationship with Eva. Evangeline wanted nothing more than to take the woman in her arms and be there for her. But that wasn’t what she wanted. Iris wanted... Iris wanted companionship without the relationship. Because the relationship she wanted eluded her, somehow.
For some reason, her and Silke didn’t work. Eva didn’t know what it was, but there seemed to be a mountain of hurt between the two. She didn’t know what could be done to fix things for these two... and... she hated to admit it to herself... but she wasn’t sure if she wanted to fix this. It felt horrible, and selfish to think of. She wanted Iris to be happy. But she wanted Iris to be happy with her. Wanted Iris to fall into her arms. Wanted Iris to come home to her. Maybe Iris didn’t love her now... but maybe she would. Someday. Maybe... maybe it was best to go with the safest option here.
“Iris? C-can... can I touch you?” Eva hoped desperately that she would be able to embrace the woman. That she wouldn’t run. That she wouldn’t disappear. She couldn’t just sit here in silence, though. Silke didn’t seem inclined to do anything about this. Eva looked at Silke again, wondering if her temperament had changed. As she did, Silke finished her cocoa, stood up, and walked out of the room. While Silke marched into the living room, she cursed from the bottom of her heart they were all in her place. Normally she would just leave situations like this, but where could she go now that she was already at home? She couldn't fall apart while there were guests around. She was so tired of crying. She felt she had cried for at least ten or more people lately.
Laurence was still sleeping on the sofa. Silke was tempted to hug him, but she decided to skip that as well. She knew if she hugged something right now, she couldn't probably hold it in anymore.
Silke had been waiting for the damn dinner so much. It was supposed to have been a new beginning for them all. If Asagi and Varg could've just started behaving like normal, functional adults around each other, it would've made everyone else's life easier. Now Silke was no longer certain did she even want to go. If Evangeline lived in the estate nowadays, no doubt she'd attend the dinner, too. And Asagi had announced Ainu, who had just arrived to Ishgard, would join them as well. Silke thought it was a terrible idea. The lalafell was a focking sociopath. And Asagi was delusional if she thought she could cure her with motherly love and care. That case was beyond help.
And if Iris thought she'd make Silke's heart melt by crying, she couldn't have been more wrong. Silke kept repeating 'self care' like a manta in her mind, hugging herself and squeezing her arms with her nails, while looking outside from the window, although there was absolutely nothing interesting there. Iris was just like the rest of them. For a moment Silke had hoped she would've been wrong, but it was all the same shite in the end, just wrapped in a slightly different package. “Don’t touch mi!” Iris screeched through her tears, while cradling herself back and forth on the chair. “Don’t ya fockin’ touch mi! W-We had a d-deal, is it so frickin’ ‘ard to u-understand?!”
Still, somewhere deep in her heart, Iris wanted Evangeline to hold her. She wanted Silke to hold her. The woman she had once been, on the streets of Limsa Lominsa, would have given anything in the world, to have someone to wrap arms around her, telling her everything would be alright. That the morning would come, after the stormy night, and it would be beautiful.
Yet that woman was trapped, deep below the layers of fear, hatred and agony. From the corner of her eyes, Iris had seen Silke emptying her cup of cocoa, and walking out of the room. The sight was the executioner, wearing a dirty, black hood, and pulling the lever, which finally dropped the heavy blade down, splitting Iris’ heart in two.
“I... I just w-wanted to build... a heckin’ castle...”, her voice was barely audible. “Wanted to build a damn castle for... for us to l-live in...” Iris got up, her head feeling dizzy.
It was like time in the room had suddenly stopped onto its tracks. The spring inside the clock had broken, freezing the pointers on the same dead moment for ever and ever. She made her way to the cup of cocoa, still resting on the counter. Her long, pale fingers, reached into the bag, picking up a single marshmallow, and placing it on the huge mountain of whipped cream. After looking at it for a while, she reached for another, and another, carefully piling them on the mountain, with her shaking hand.
“...A-And dis is where dey lived...”, she muttered, while balancing the candy onto drink. “...A h-heckin’ beautiful castle, on a mountains... dat rose above t-tha forest, like clouds... Damn lucky bastards... A poet and ‘er muse. I-I bet ya ‘ave never seen such beautiful woman...” Iris paused for a moment, to wipe away tears that were running free over her cheeks, like small, salty rivulets.
“...Yet da poet had a s-secret... ‘Er words were poison. Drippin’ from ‘er mouth, every time she opened it to weave words. Why? ...Because tha poet was... a frickin’ monster... A creature, which was in love wid tha gal, and ‘ad taken a form o’ a poet to be wid ‘er... Yet tha mask on ‘er face did not keep tha poison from drippin’... And all tha words tha poet weaved for dat gal? Dey just tainted ‘er. Made ‘er sick... And when da gal finally withered awai? Tha castle on clouds came crashin’ down, buryin’ tha monster alive...”
As Iris stopped, the pile of marshmallows on the whipped cream had grown into an unstable little mountain on its own. She picked up a spoon, her hand shaking, and scooped up most of the whipped cream and candies. “...Fockin’ crashin’ down...” She placed the spoonful into her mouth, and the sweet taste mixed with the saltiness of her own tears. Evangeline sat, listening to Iris weave her story. A fairy tale... Eva wondered if this was some sort of response to trauma. Iris’ other self seemed to be lost in a dreamland, so fully steeped in fantasy that she couldn’t recognize any part of reality. This... this seemed to be Iris teetering on the edge. Wavering between reality and fantasy. Because... because she couldn’t bear... to lose Silke. Damnable, adorable Silke.
After a few minutes, Iris’ story ended, the monster that represented her crushed under a mountain of rubble. Evangeline stood up, hoping that she could figure out how to handle this one. Hoping that she could pull Iris from the edge, and not hurl her off of it unintentionally. She took a step forward... and then another. She felt as if her shoes were lined with lead. She reached up, placing a trembling hand on Iris’ shoulder almost instinctively, her mind ceding to her body once again. Iris winced as Eva touched her shoulder, but didn’t seem to react any other way, still poking at the cocoa with her spoon, eyes fixed on the horizon, where dark clouds were gathering.
“Iris…”, Evangeline said quietly. “I may not be much... but I’m not going anywhere. I know I’m not h-her... but I am yours. I’m right here... by your side. And you’re... you’re right here with me. I couldn’t i-imagine how you’re feeling right now... but I’ll stay with you through it. I’m not running away. I...I don’t want to restrict you... or keep you... I just want to be with you…”, she trailed off, biting her lip.
Gods this was difficult. Finding words... she felt like she was just repeating things she had already said. “I-I like you. A lot.” She blurted out. “You’re att... att…”, her mouth couldn’t find the word, caught in her throat as it was. “Att… attrraactive to me for a lot of reasons. Y-you’re strong...and p-perseverant... you’re beautiful… but I want you to be free, still.”
The tears were welling up in her eyes now... wouldn’t be long before she couldn’t hold them back any more. She thought briefly of offering to talk to Silke... but she was feeling a little too selfish to do that right now. Maybe if Iris asked her... “I want to touch you... to hold you... b-because I think it might help... but I don’t want you to feel trapped…”, she said, her breath catching in her lungs as she did. “C-can you let me? I’ll let go... I’ll let go the moment you ask me to.” Silke heard the other two talking something in the kitchen, and as time passed, she became more and more convinced she either had to get rid of them, or she had to get out. She glanced once again at Laurence sleeping on the couch.
That's right. She hadn't taken him out yet. A perfect excuse. She hurried to her closet and rummaged through it, trying to find some clothes that hadn't been amongst the laundry. The fancy dress Iris had given her was there, but right now Silke would've rather walked out naked than worn it. There were also both of her party dresses. They were all black, but the other one was long and fancy, and didn't have sleeves. Silke had planned to wear it during the dinner. The other one was festive as well, but compared to the first one, way more casual. Its hem reached her knees, it had tight, long puff sleeves, and it didn't reveal as much. That would do, she thought.
Silke quickly changed into it, hoping the other two wouldn't surprise her meanwhile. They didn't. They seemed to have much to talk about.
Simultaneously Silke took off her tiny panties and revealing nightgown. She had used them only for one night, so they hadn't gotten dirty yet. She'd return them to Iris before they left. Silke didn't have to go out without pants, since she also managed to find some old leggings that had gotten short for her. She didn't mind. Nobody would notice their length while she was wearing her high heeled, leathery thighboots.
Silke combed her hair hastily and tied the long, thick ponytail on her crown. Her bangs were somewhat messy, but she didn't bother to do anything to them. Meanwhile looking at herself from mirror she pondered maybe she could go to store too. That would prolong her trip to the city, and Iris and Evangeline would've hopefully focked off by then. Though, Silke was too tired to see too much effort for her make-up. She took a black eyeliner and drew even darker circles on the ones already existing. She painted her lips dark pink, so that she wouldn't look like a corpse.
"Laurence? Are you awake, boy?" she asked in a tired voice, while crouching next to the sofa, gently petting the sleepy dog. Iris heard Eva’s words, but it was like they were coming from somewhere, really far away, behind a veil of fog, even though she knew the woman was standing right behind her. Y-You are not well... s-something is wrong... Iris shook her head, trying to make the voice go away... It didn’t.
I... I want my knight... my knight in a shining armor, where is he? I have... I have lost my knight!
“Shut up!!”
T-The castle, it’s... its crumbling. What is happening..? Help me... please...
“Shut up, shut up, shut up!!”
Iris closed her eyes tightly, fingers on her temples, long, clawlike nails, digging in and drawing blood. She took a step back, walking into Evangeline, and leaning back against the woman’s chest.
Evangeline tensed up for a moment. The other woman was struggling, that much was obvious. Eva hoped that she could calm her down. She was digging her nails into her forehead again. Without even thinking about it, Evangeline gently placed her arms around Iris, not holding her back, or restricting her movement, but cuddling up against Iris' lithe frame.
"Iris... Iris you're here with me, okay? It's just you, Iris. Just you and me. You are Iris, nobody else. It's going to be okay... everything is going to be okay. Listen to the sound of my voice... follow me back..."
“...All I wanted to do, is fockin’ build a castle... L-Look at dat!” Iris waved her hands towards Evangeline’s mug, still resting on the counter, untouched. “Dere is no fockin’ castle... W-Where is my knight? I... I want my... I want mi Silke... Cinnabun? I’m.. I’m so...”
Iris felt the arms that were wrapped around her, like a cradle, everything else was hidden behind the deep fog in her head. What was this place? Who was she? And who’s arms were these? She did not really care anymore.
She felt numb, and when the fog finally parted, she was standing on a shore. A shore of white sand, like ground bones reached as far as the eye can see on her both sides. And in front of her? There was a ocean. A black ocean from where the calms waves rolled in to shore, to caress it like a lover’s fingers for just a moment, before falling back into the embrace of the ocean.
Iris took one step... and another. Her eyes caught the arm, where the burn had been only a moment ago. Yet now? There was nothing. The burn was gone, same with the pain it had brought. Tilting her head, Iris poked the skin couple of times, then pinching it between her fingers, and pullin. No pain. Nothing. She kept walking.
The black waves were calling her with a voice she knew, but could not place to who it belonged to. She stepped into water, walking on, until it reached almost to her knees, when she heard another voice from behind her, and turned around. On the waterline, veiled by the fog, she saw three figures. A Three pairs of long ears.
A tall warrior, a woman with long, ghostly hair, and a sickly, corpse-like woman, standing between them. The panic washed over her... she had to walk back, what was she doing? Yet, when she tried to move her legs, they felt like something was holding them from the bottom of the ocean.
Oh gods... You sound like a vulture... They are my favourite birds...
It’s going to be okay... Everything is going to be okay...
S-Something is not right...
The panic washed over Iris, and she jerked her leg again, but instead of getting it free, she lost her balance, falling back into the embrace of deep black. Iris gasped in Evangeline’s embrace, opening her eyes.
Her burned arm looked horrible. Like someone had been ripping out skin from the burned area. She sighed deeply, moving her fingers on top of the burn, and mumbling words under her breath. A faint light, mix of black and shades of purple started dancing around her fingertips, slowly sewing shut the worst of the damage, even though the arm still looked burned and blistered.
“Seven hells, how did this happen?" Iris’ eyes were closed. She seemed stuck... wrapped in a dreamlike state, twitching involuntarily as if she were sleeping. Evangeline’s heart rate rose, as fear gripped at her, clawing at her arms, her legs... she held Iris, still as gently as if her arms were wrapped around the finest glass vase the world had ever seen.
How was Iris suddenly so precious to her? Why did she feel the need to protect her? Some people had baggage...but Iris had wagonfulls. Cities filled with baggage. The smart move would be to walk away from this mess. To set Iris gently down and leave this place... run far away from Ishgard and never return. Maybe she could win Solenna back.
She barely entertained the thought, though, looking at Iris’ face. Pained and thin, weak and scared. Beautiful, pitiful, and now...alone. Eva could leave her no more than she could leave her own legs behind. She would just have to figure something out.
As Iris opened her eyes, gasping for breath as if she had been drowning, Evangeline’s heart leapt from her chest, relief pouring through her veins. She was about to say something... to thank the twelve that Iris was back... but she watched as Iris sighed and healed her arm.
”Seven hells, how did this happen?” ...What? That... that wasn’t Iris’ voice. Iris couldn’t heal herself. This was wrong. Something was wrong. This wasn’t the other, either. The one who called herself ‘Lareine’ didn’t speak like that.
Evangeline felt herself tense up again, her relief pulled out of her body like air from a drowned person’s lungs. Still keeping her arms gently around the body of Iris, she whispered quietly to the not-Iris:
“In response to your question... you spilled boiling water on your arm. It was burned, and I was caring for it. I have a question of my own, though, if you don’t mind... what is your name?” ‘Burned my arm..?’ the pale viera thought to herself, as her eyes caught Evangeline’s arms, still wrapped around her. ‘Must have been wild evening’.
She had no idea where she was. Nothing in this place seemed in any way familiar to her. She had no memory of burning her arm with boiling water... and the whole idea sounded so foolish in her head. And on top of everything. Who the hell was this woman, embracing her, and tending to her injury? The burn would leave a scar by now... Why did she not tend it with magic herself it in the first place?
Maybe this was all just a twisted dream, and she would wake up sooner or later. The not-Iris reached out towards the counter, picking up the cup of cocoa, and brought it on her lips, taking a sip.
“Well, considering the fact you are asking for my name, I guess you are not my mate... So my second guess would be... One-night stand? Either way, I would be grateful, if you removed your arms from me. As much as this looks like some ending scene on a romance novel, with whole kitchen and hot cocoa... Having a complete stranger just hanging on your ass is rather... obtrusive.”
Placing down her cup, the viera studied the arms that were holding her. Strong... hardy... the woman was either a soldier, or maybe a smith. A farmhand was unlikely, considering the overall cleanliness or the arms and nails. ‘Must be a soldier of some sort’.
“The name is Irene... Irene d’Espair... and I guess this is a pleasure. For now.” The other two could hear a silent snapping against the floor, before Laurence appeared from the living room, stretching and yawning, and wearing a red leather collar, decorated with silver colored, heart shaped staples. A black leather leash had been tied to the collar, and soon Silke appeared from the living room after the dog, holding the other end of the leash, and her high heeled boots snapping the floor as well, though more loudly.
"Guys?" she said, smiling warmly with her narrow lips that resembled a rosebud. However, her turquoise eyes were faded like a corpse's, and devoid of any emotion. "I just remembered the last time I took Laurence out was yesterday evening. I need to go. And I'm going to fetch some groceries too, so don't bother waiting for me. This is going to take a while." Irene turned her head towards the voice, as much as she could with Evangeline’s arms around her. The woman was so tall, Irene could barely peek over her shoulder, but when she did, she saw another viera woman on the doorway. Now this was... curious? How many people were there, calling this lousy hole ‘a home’?
The newcomer was a complete opposite to the viera holding her. Pale skin... straight hair pulled up on a thick ponytail, and dead eyes behind those round glasses smeared with black. The overall impression of the woman was apathetic, even with the beautiful dress and red-painted lips. A junkie most likely... and by the looks of it... a prostitute.
“Well... good morning to you too...” Irene said. At this point, Silke's expectations of the other two and especially Iris had sunken so deep one would've needed a shovel... or no, a digger, to dig them back up to daylight. However, this was the new low. This was the peak of insolence. First Iris had the nerve to strut here, bragging about her fock partner, and now she was behaving like Silke would've interrupted their affectionate moment in her own kitchen.
Instead of giving the lingerie to Iris, Silke squeezed them into her leash free fist and hurled them onto the floor, next to their feet.
"Oh for fock's sake!" she could no longer remain polite. "You two damsels better drag your asses out of my place before I return if you value those pretty faces of yours!"
With that, she flung the door open, marched out with the excited shiba, and slammed the door shut behind her with such power that it made the windows jingle. Irene stared at the viera’s sudden outburst, wincing, as the door was slammed shut. Her gaze traveled from the door to the rather slutty lingerie on the floor, and up to Evangeline. “Your wife, I presume?” Evangeline removed her arms the moment it was requested. She was almost immediately overwhelmed by just how much everything had come crashing down in just the last few minutes. Crying... heartbreak... she could deal with that, and take it in stride. Maybe. For now.
But she had thought...she had thought there were only two of them. What in Halone’s name was she supposed to do now…? She could only hope that what worked last time would work again. As Silke left in a huff, Eva called out to her, hoping she would stop, but she was already well on her way down the stairs, the sound of the door slamming most likely preventing Silke from hearing her regardless.
“Wait, Silke! She’s not…”, she trailed off, realizing how fruitless it was to say ‘not Iris’ given that Silke was long gone already. She was upset... not just upset, but fuming. Evangeline hoped she could do something... but for fuck’s sake if this wasn’t more important right now, she didn’t know what was.
Evangeline was taken aback at not-Iris’ statement, wondering how those dots in particular had decided to connect in her mind. She blushed slightly, mumbling: “N-no...she’s...she’s your best friend. You brought me here to introduce me to her.” She shook her head slowly.
“More to the point…” Eva looked into not-Iris’ eyes. Once again... it was so alien. So not Iris. The spark, the flame that sat beneath the lakes of purple was unusual. There wasn’t a hint of Iris left.
“Iris... are you there? Can you hear me? Come back to me...please…”, she pleaded, hoping desperately that it would work. She was afraid of what would happen... Iris had left because of Silke. Evangeline wasn’t enough. Just like she had always been... not enough. Insufficient. Irene kept her purple eyes nailed onto the viera infront of her. This situation was absurd. Quite intriguing, but absurd... ‘This woman is mad as a cuckoo clock’, she thought to herself, while following the other’s pleas, calling for someone named ‘Iris’. Oh, how she wanted to open this lady’s head, just to see what was going on inside it... And if this was Irene’s dream... would the red-head even mind a little poking around her brain? Such an intriguing case...
“Wait, wait, wait...”, Irene said finally, her voice calm, like a surface of a lake after a storm had ended. “...First of all... I dont know who this ‘Iris’ is... I also have no idea who the woman who just walked out was. I have never seen her before. What I think, girl, is that you are going through a mild case of psychosis... most likely triggered by your wife, finding us together. My name is Irene... And I have never been here before. Honestly? I still believe this is some mindless dream, but in case its not... I’m willing to help you out... If I can, that is.”
A weird smile played on Irene’s lips. A smile that did not reach the eyes. The eyes were cold, and lifeless, except the small foxfire looming behind the purple pools. She placed her hand, or Iris’ hand onto Evangeline’s shoulder. “I think we should go, before your loved one returns. Seeing her now, might just mess your little head even more than it already is.” Iris’ eyes didn’t change. She didn’t wake up... or gain control... like she had before. Usually Iris was desperate to fight to the surface. She had such a strong will. Which meant... which meant this time... she didn’t want to come back. Eva wasn’t enough. She was never enough. She was never what anyone wanted.
Her breath came fast and ragged, such that she was almost hyperventilating. Trying desperately to contain herself, she listened to the not-Iris speak. Offer to ‘help’ her. Flash her a lifeless, lightless smile. A not-Iris smile. Evangeline couldn’t help herself anymore, and burst into tears. Sobbing into her hands, she was able to squeak:
“Y-yeess... w-we should g-go…”
Nodding her head slowly, she gasped for breath, trying to see the other woman through the tears. Maybe this was the best way to do things... she couldn’t let the not-Iris get away from her. Maybe she could get her back to house Blacksoul, and seek help from its lord, or at least Arsene.
“I... I have a place... a p-place we can go…,” she whispered between whimpers. “J-just give me a moment t-to... com-compose myself…” Irene reached for her small incredient pouch, but it was not there... Thinking about it further, these were not even her clothes. The style was rather decent, so she could have very well picked them, but... it was not what she would usually wear. Quickly she went through the pockets of a jacket she had over the long black dress, but the only thing she could find was a pack of cigarettes, and a lighter. No sign of her pouch.
She had hoped to give the weeping woman something to calm her nerves, but it was no use. ‘What happened to me anyway? Something does not sum up...’ The pale viera ended up to offer the pack of smokes towards Eva.
“These are yours? ...Wait a moment.” Irene lit a cigarette, drawing from it deep, and muttering words, her eyes closed. The words were barely audible, and did not sound like any language Evangeline understood.
Smoke was running over her lips with the words, and soon it gained a very faint glow. Irene leaned towards Eva, blowing the glowing smoke right into her mouth.
Evangeline was struggling to think straight. She didn't have much control over herself... her emotions were too much to contain right now. So intense were her feelings that she barely even noticed Irene take a drag of a cigarette and blow a lungfull of oddly colored smoke into her mouth. Her breath halted, and she immediately felt her lungs constrict, unfamiliar with the new sensation she was experiencing. Instinctively, though, she took a deep breath in, accepting the strange smoke into her body without realizing it.
Immediately, she felt a strange calm wash over her, as if her fears and worries had been constrained to a place just below the surface of her mind. She could still feel them beating at her, trying to break down the door, but they were restrained for now. She shook her head, and wiped her eyes.
"Whaat... what was that? What did you just do...? And how did you do it? Iris didn't have... she didn't have any magic."
“I still dont know who this ‘Iris’ is, who you keep talking about, but I have few tricks up my sleeve”, Irene reminded. “Just try to stay calm. The effect is rather light, especially as I did not have my own incredients. But at least you are breathing again. Thats good.”
Irene picked up the mug of cocoa, and emptied it, before finishing the smoke. The cold, dead smile was still lingering on her lips, as she threw the pack of cigarettes to Eva, and walked past the woman, and towards the door, Silke had slammed shut only a moment earlier.
“Dont cry for your girl... She will come back to you, if its meant to be. Now shall we?” she nodded towards the door. “You have not told me your name yet.” Evangeline caught the cigarette pack. She felt falsely calm. It was such an alien feeling to her. That she should be so heartbroken and at the same time so controlled in the face of it was highly unusual. Her thoughts moved through her mind, tasting it and testing it as one would test a cut in one’s mouth, touching it with their tongue to see if it hurt. So enthralled was she with her sudden state of being that she almost forgot to answer the not-Iris’ question.
“Hello... my name is Evangeline. Evangeline Cross. Thank you... for whatever that was. As it seems that I have failed, and that we may be together for a time, perhaps I could do my best to furnish you with some information. Let’s... let’s walk and talk, shall we?”
Eva wandered towards the door, already starting to feel the despair creep back into her heart. She needed help... she needed Silke. She needed Silke to help her get Iris back. The viera was certainly gone for now, but perhaps Evangeline could return on another day. She would find a way to bring Iris back to her... she had to. She just hoped that it would be soon.
Eva opened the door, letting in a draft of dry, cold air. She motioned for the not-Iris to exit the building ahead of her, and stepped through the doorway behind her, shutting it behind her with a soft click.
With @lareine-kira & @evangeline-cross :3c
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
about me
m hey! im myles, you’re (least) favorite trans pan boy :).
anywhore, im making this post to tell you about me. im 13, i have fading blue/green/blonde hair, but i'm hopefully going to my natural brown again.
i have hazel eyes which im very proud of. i was cursed with very long eyelashes which i'm not proud of (seriously! they're so long!) i have freckles littering my body, and i stand at about five foot nothing (shot boi). i weigh about 109 lbs (and currently struggling with anorexia).
my hair goes to my chin-ish and is shaved all around the sides (hopefully ill share a picture in the (probably far far) future). im very childish. i own way too many blankets (small obsession) and my bed is covered in stuffed animals (another small obsession). i have much too many books, which is yet another obsession, surprise!
my book are currently in alphabetical order, and my clothes are very neatly sorted. (short sleeve rainbow order on one side of my closet, and long sleeve rainbow order on the other side, and my dresser is very organized as well.)
i struggle with depression, general anxiety, separation anxiety, ptsd, bipolar, anorexia, and signs of add/adhd.
i have a cup of crystals by my bed, and four of my favorite porcelain dolls. oh yeah, i collect porcelain dolls.
it was the only other this me and my grandma did other than buying stuff at garage sales.
the wall with my door on it in my room is covered (i mean covered) in pictures. most family, but they are a few band/music pictures in there.
lets not forget about the twenty on pilots bandana.
the wall with my bed against it has i painting of two angels (thank you, nanny) and a melanie martinez flag (thank you, me)
the wall right next to that has a giant window, so there isn't anything on it yet. the wall with my closet have a stranger things calendar (thank you, aunty).
the wall with my calendar has my dresser on it. in my dresser i have a drawer for running shorts (i do xc and track), normal shorts, and shorts for around the house only.
i have drawers for my sweats for school and my sweats for home only. same with my leggings.
my jeans have one drawer for my sknny jeans (which is almost all of them) and one for my bootcut/other jeans.
i have one drawer for my skirts, one drawer for socks (that is very over filled) and one for my other stuff.
i keep my binder on top of my dresser with my aroma diffuser (which usually has lavender), my one sand art thing from the county fair, my horse piggy bank that my friend insisted that i would hate but i actually love.
i have most of my lotions and perfumes on my dresser, along with my other essential oils. i have my three potery-looking things i made for art class through out the years of 4th-7th grade.
on my door hangs coat hangers that are about to fall off with my amount of hoodies jackets.
my bed is a grey/gray loft bed. its about three feet tall, light grey/gray and has two shelves with my bed on top, and a hang out area on the bottom. the shelves hold all my loose papers, mason jars, other piggy banks, the seven totes of random stuff, my pokemon card binders, my party poison mask, and just about every single water bottle i own.
on top of my bed i have countless blankets and about 40 of my stuffed animals. like i said, obsessed.
the window wall has my dark brown desk that has been painted and colored on by me and my friends too many times.
in the main section, i hold all my jewelry. on top my desk, i hold the painting im working on. the left drawer holds my earrings. the right drawer holds my....nothing apparently.
next to my desk, i have my three drawers that hold my trash, loose papers, and shirts that wont fit in my closet.
in the corner where my bookshelf and bed meet, my art box sits on the floor. in there, i have about every single marker, crayon, pencil, colored pencil, and pen i have ever owned.
in my closet, on the long sleeved side hides another three drawers that hold my shoes. on the short sleeved side it has one bin for some of my blankets, and on top of that i have a bin of random things. next to those, i have another bin of shirts that wont hang up.
on the top shelf of my closet, i have all my backpacks, a few posters, a wood train i made in kansas, and what i like to call my box of nostalgia. in my box holds just about every single paper i have ever done at school, shirts i made in my childhood, and papers my mom made every week from age 2-5.
almost forgot, on top of my three drawers by my desk sits my favorite awards. one from my dad that i can never seem to make proud, and the awards i got in sixth grade for being a good kid.
moving on, what fandoms am i in?
i love palaye royale (royale council (little bastards SLAPS))
twenty one pilots (clique (level of concern also SLAPS)) (currently listening to taken by sleep while writing this. time to cry.)
fall out boy (youngbloods)
yungblud (bhc (black hearts club))
my chemical romance (mcrmy)
waterparks (or wudderparks) (parxies (i think thats what we’re called)) (TOOTHBAT)
black veil brides (bvb army)
panic! at the disco (sinners)
new years day (???)
melanie martinez (crybabies)
pierce the veil (???)
sleeping with sirens (the strays (i think))
paramore (parawhores)
cavetown (???)
falling in reverse (???)
hamilton (hamiltrash is what i call us)
dear evan hansen (???)
heathers (???)
crankthatfrank (obviously) (yeemos)
harry styles (???)
5 seconds of summer (???)
hollywood undead (???)
girl in red (???)
jessie paege (???) (queen) (our bisexual father)
phantom of the opera (???) (i actually got to see the opera on november 2nd, 2019. i cried. i laughed. i loved it. i went with my mom.)
green day (???)
all time low (???)
bring me the horizon (???)
calpurnia (???)
i actually bought two sws stickers and a bmth sticker a few days ago. they should be here soon.
well. i think thats about it for now. once again im myles, and my messages are always open. have a good day/night to all you guys gals and non binary pals.
love forever, myles.
1 note
·
View note
Text
scandal - cliques and sex
**i really love my manager, he was the manager at my store about 3 years ago before i transferred, he then left and then came back about a month or so after i transferred. i've came to him with so many problems - both work related and personally due to various things such as the death of a family member, mental health and even because i wanted time off to do some silly uni assignment last minute. he let me leave 45 mins early one day because i looked upset - he's a gem. and its not just me that he does this shit for - its everyone. i get on with him personally as we have similar interests. he's a pretty good boss most of the time, and he's never been an asshole to me.**
this is kind of a fuck-managers, fuck co-workers thing but anyway my work has broke into proper scandal recently.
ANYWAY, its highly likely my boss is fucking one of my co-workers, let's call her becky so i don't refer to her as "this girl" 24/7. shes 25, hes 30.
it's a huuuge story and we basically need to speak about it all for it to all make sense. (and believe me this is the cut version)
when my boss become the store manager for the second time, everyone was happy cos he's amazing but there was a lot of giggling like, "oh becky will be happy, she loves him" blah blah blah all that bullshit. anyway, she had a boyfriend at the time and he was in a pretty serious long term relationship. i never thought anything of it, cos he is a pretty man and he seemed to be her "type".
flash forward to about a year later, late 2016, she gets promoted to keyholder. she did a lot of opening shifts - often with my boss. again, i see no problem with this. she's full time and she gets on with everyone. progression. good for her.
but this is when shit gets nasty! she becomes friends with these two part time girls - obviously there's nothing wrong with this but they form a pretty brutal clique. they managed to get shifts together and just sorta stood and spoke for the whole shift, had their lunches together and did no work whilst hating on everyone else for not doing work, idk whatever. they have this whatsapp chat, where they added pretty much every girl apart from me, a girl we will call "sally" (who similarly, fucked our old supervisor but thats a different story and they date now so its not as bad), the xmas temps, the other full time girl and the mature student whose part time. i cared at first but i got over it pretty soon.
becky became very nasty to sally, basically because sally seen through her shit and called her out for being a bitch. becky managed to turn most of the girls away from sally, apart from those not in the chat and one of the girls in the groupchat ("emily") who never contributed. sally spoke to my boss about it because she was feeling really shitty, and he just kinda swept it under the carpet - very not a him thing to do. sally couldnt take it and ended up quitting - which is a shame, because sally was probs my closest friend at work.
i spoke to sally about this at a later date when we met up and she said that when she opened with becky and the manager they ignored her and made her do stupid tasks whilst they did really minor jobs together. she said it reminded her of what her and her now boyfriend used to do at work. this opens my eyes a lil, and i noticed anytime i am working with them that they talk a lot, and go on lunch together - my boss normally takes his lunch alone when shes not in and he used to drive home and eat it with his girlfriend - or he'd sit in a cafe.
jumping a little bit, i was on a shift and was on the phone to a manager of another store, he asked to speak to our manager, and i couldnt find him anywhere. when i finally find him i just hand him the phone, not saying anything because the store was really busy. it sinks in as i walk away from him that i caught him crying. he doesn't properly bring it up again but he asks me and a few other people "what would you do if you saw me crying" - i feel mega guilty but act as if i honestly didnt see, cause its awkward. idk if i mentioned it before but he has like major depression, possibly bipolar but hasnt confronted his doctor on this (i dunno how many people know this) and like, i think some things get to him. like if him and the area manager disagree, or if him and his girlfriend fell out or if he fucked something simple up. hes quite reserved during the xmas period, and very unlike himself. i mention this to a supervisor im very good friends with a few weeks later and they tells me that hes been having problems with his girlfriend and she got rid of their pet dog, for no apparent reason.
so thats...really shit.
at some point becky and her boyfriend break up, im not sure but i notice after a facebook stalk at the start of 2017. this is around the time my manager starts to act more like himself and work feels more normal.
and this is when shit gets more obvious and more weird.
there's a shift im on with the manager, emily and one of the boys we work with. one of our other managers is getting married and my boss recommended him his friend to be the photographer. so we're all talking about weddings and getting married and children. when we ask our manager about this, he acts flakey and says he doesnt want to get married. its left there but im in with the same people (excluding boss) and becky the next day and the conversation picks up - becky says she really wants to get married but doubts it will happen because she'll "probably fall in love with someone who doesn't want to get married".
my boss starts using his phone on the shopfloor, snapchatting and texting, it gets to the point that our area manager BANS him from using his phone. myself and other staff members notice that he's snapchatting becky a lot. emily tells us when she went on a night out with "the girls" (from the groupchat) becky wasn't off her phone, snapchatting him with "the girls" but then hiding her phone and texting him when she thought nobody was looking. obviously, her little clique seen nothing wrong with this, or blindly ignored it but by this point emily was sick of her shit.
we win a staff night out. long story short, they go off together for ages.
another time, she goes over to his house (that he shares with his girlfriend) with the shitty excuse that he was gonna fix her laptop, cos "he can fix them".
i hear from the same supervisor that told me before about his relationship problems that his girlfriend was looking for jobs in another city without really consulting him. so things are pretty bad.
emily (bless her) left the groupchat after too many bitching sessions. they start targeting this poor younger gal at work that becky decides to randomly argue with on facebook. they all claim they dislike her because "theres just something about her". i think the gal knows that becky despises her for no apparent reason and is sick of it so she blocks her. they dont really work together anyway, so idk, its a bit drastic but i suppose its fair. emily defends her and leaves. the next day at work, she shows us the whatsapp chat.
becky screenshots a conversation between her and boss that has statements like "tbh i only hired her because she was hot" and him making a meme of her. its HORRIBLE. its so out of character and weird. and it seems even more fishy that becky is stirring it by showing a large chunk of the work group. personally i feel like becky knows exactly what shes doing, idk, i feel like shes took advantage of the pretty good nature of our sometimes unstable manager and make him like this. i have no idea, i could be biased cos i really like him - he could be using her as a bit on the side, taking advantage of the fact she always had a crush on him.
someone tells other management about the whatsapp, cause y'no... its sick. and emily shows the other managers the picture, and they call him up on it. he seems to be pretty apologetic about it but idk. becky sends emily passive aggressive texts about the whole thing saying she trusted her and whatever blah blah blah... i dont care. its a lot of shit.
someone at my work calls my manager on the way he is with becky and apparently just breaks down into tears and says he left his girlfriend last night and slept in his car. about a week later, someone else calls him out on it and he says he knows he's "been a dick" and kinda ignores the confrontation. i think hes back in his house now, no idea about his girlfriend.
beckys girl posse dont know anything about it, or claim not to, not even the two who shes closest to. i go to the same uni as one of them and one day we meet for lunch, it comes into conversation and she says "well its not any of my business" i try and remain neutral and say if they are doing anything its not fair on either of them and she says: "no its not fair on becky if he doesnt want to date her and only wants to fuck her", goes bright red and changes the subject.
a few days later, emilys brother who works in a takeaway where becky lives sees both becky and our manager ordering (emilys brother comes into our work a lot - just before the "how did he know who they were" bullshit). he tells emily, and says to her just to say that he saw him, apparently he went bright red about this and quizzed emily on when this was (obv because he knew he was getting caught in this scandal) but she said she wasnt sure.
so, this week, becky and my manager were caught coming to work together, when they live in complete opposite directions of eachother. i think someones reporting him and i think becky might be transferring to another store.
this is all confusing and a clusterfuck but it feels like something that would happen in a soap opera and its something that i thought i should share.
if there's any updates on either
- the clique being more bitchy
or
- manager/becky relations
i'll keep y'all posted!
111 notes
·
View notes
Note
Tell me about the Important Headcanons questions for uuuuuuh Cup and Jo and Purl and Tyslinn pls I love all of your kids. ALSO BURIM. Lov Burim
hell yeah hell yeah
Cup
can they use chopsticks: Yes! what do they do when they cant sleep: watch make up tutorials from like 5+ years ago made by people that are really good now but were uh...not so good 5 years ago. what would they impulse buy at the grocery store: shower curtains? is probably strange but also have you ever just fallen in love with bizzarre fuckin shower curtains in a store b/c i have but i have impulse control. what order do they wash things in the shower: top to bottom??? hair first and then work his way down i guess. what’s their coffee order: making at home its no milk extra sugar, getting it from a store its pumped full of as much chocolate as their allowed to put in one coffee and as much whip cream as possible. what sort of apps would they have on their smartphone: snapchat, twitter, probably whatever is the fad but he deletes it as soon as the fad is over. how do they act around children: he surprisingly really likes kids but he treats them like adults which is good in some ways but also bad in others. what would they watch on tv when they’re bored and nothing they really like is on: hgtv or whatever the equivalent of all the home renovation/buying shows is in this world lmao.
Jo
can they use chopsticks: probably not what do they do when they cant sleep: stare at the ceiling or floor mostly, or look on the space internet. what would they impulse buy at the grocery store: food they remember from childhood but haven’t had in years. also if there’s a card section, pick one at random and then give it to one of the crew. if tali receives one more “Get You’re Well Super Soon Cool” card she might lose it. Garrus got a “Happy Birthday, Girlfriend Birthday You’re my Boyfriend!” card and he keeps it in the case he keeps his favorite sniper rifle in. what order do they wash things in the shower: stand in the shower for like 10 minutes doing nothing and then speed wash everything at once. what’s their coffee order: black and they hate coffeewhat sort of apps would they have on their smartphone: she has a celebrity watch/gossip app and there’s a fun game on the normandy where she punches the arm of whoever shows up on the app’s front page. garrus gets hit a lot but its mostly in pictures with her so she gets punched back. it’s funhow do they act around children: the first time jo saw a krogan baby she cried a little bit, jo didnt really feel anything toward babies until the whole krogan thing and she’s kind of indifferent toward children? she’s pretty good with them though. what would they watch on tv when they’re bored and nothing they really like is on: horrid soap operas (everyone knows she’s actively seeking them out and not just channel flipping, “you don’t just channel flip to a horrid soap opera and /stay there/ jo....” “that’s exactly what you do garrus” “no joey listen...”)
Purl
can they use chopsticks: yes what do they do when they cant sleep: she immediately starts doing some activity you shouldnt do while you should be sleeping, like something with needles or sharp things. what would they impulse buy at the grocery store: so much junk foodwhat order do they wash things in the shower: body first, hair second, singing alllll throughoutwhat’s their coffee order: LARGE+ not decaf, she needs the caffeine she doesnt care whats in it. what sort of apps would they have on their smartphone: she has too many apps, all of them are about taking care of little creatures and a few horoscope ones along with the normal social media stuffhow do they act around children: she’s not super comfortable around kids but she wants to bewhat would they watch on tv when they’re bored and nothing they really like is on: i can see her stopping on people talking about a sports game that just finished/half time thing and just leaving it on.
Tyslinn
can they use chopsticks: no but she tries her bestwhat do they do when they cant sleep: hum when alone, while they had the camp set up she’d look up at the stars and they never helped her sleep b/c she was still so amazed by them, later they brought her a lot of comfort what would they impulse buy at the grocery store: i cant really see her impulse buying anything, but i can see her eyeing something for 5 minutes and leliana buying it for her or the store owner being like ‘oh hey you uh, you really want this huh? maybe we can work out a deal or something’ what order do they wash things in the shower: hair then bodywhat’s their coffee order: not a coffee galwhat sort of apps would they have on their smartphone: tys has the most basic shit possiblehow do they act around children: if a nice pat on the head and solemn nod doesnt work she is totally lost and doesnt really know what to do. what would they watch on tv when they’re bored and nothing they really like is on: leliana opens up candy making videos on medieval fantasy youtube for her.
Burim
can they use chopsticks: yes what do they do when they cant sleep: he likes to sit outside (no matter what season or weather it is) and then go back inside, it normally helps him get sleepywhat would they impulse buy at the grocery store: sweets!!! he kind of loves chocolate. Sometimes he buys weird fruit he’s never seen before and dares people around him to eat some before he tries it. what order do they wash things in the shower: body first, then hair, and i feel like horns need special care? probably. what’s their coffee order: not a coffee boy, really likes tea, will drink regular coffee if its given to him. what sort of apps would they have on their smartphone: animal shelter apps to see how many cute animals he could adopt but isnt BUT ALSO he gets really happy when he sees the animals got adopted. and at least one really bad free dating sim gamehow do they act around children: he tries his dang best and he’s pretty okay what would they watch on tv when they’re bored and nothing they really like is on: im gonna say same as jodine except he actually did happen upon shitty soap opera totally by accident and not on purpose but now it’s 16 episodes in and dorian is also watching with him.
1 note
·
View note