#im never going to be able to ''overcome'' a neurological disorder

[nattousan]

On being nice and neurodivergent and ultimately useless.

i see a pattern forming

ever since i got fired from my signshop job there has been a trend

maybe even before that

I get hired at a place, they're happy to have me

i show up early and they laugh at my jokes

I throw my everything into learning and they assure me

when i forget

you'll get better, don't worry, you're still new...

i smile and thank them

avoiding eye contact with the other shoe as it waits

for its turn

to drop.

weeks go by

I'm very friendly

all my coworkers are so nice,

correcting me when I forget for the ♾️th time today

we show each other pet photos in the break room,

just out of sight of the shoe

To keep in their good graces, i'm always on time

always eager to please, happy to help

even when i get it wrong

please don't let the other shoe drop, i need to pay rent.

We've reached past the point of plausible deniability,

You should know this by now.

They've stopped laughing at my jokes.

I never complain, always thank them for reminding me

I'm so kind, i bet they wish i wasn't,

everyones so sad to have to let me go.

You're a really great person! They say, handing me my termination letter

if only you weren't so (forgetful/inattentive/oblivious/uselessuselessuseless)

My ears ring louder every time that other shoe clatters to the floor

and i'm shown the door

i wish i could get paid

to be a nice person.