#im being committed to loose strings and this is new to me

[tennessoui]

For my own mental health I imagine that Padme and Sabe do end up together in the Hanahaki au after a lot of time building back trust but Sabe Will Never not use the surgery to win arguments lmao

Padme: but if I do this it’ll gut the infrastructure

Sabe: oh that’s no prob, just go into it with surgical precision

Padme: what

Sabe: just make sure to cut out any corruption it could bring

Padme: Sabe. Sabe pease

I love this !!! I don’t think I’m going to have an official stance on Padmé and Sabé’s relationship post fic cause that’s not the focus of the story and it feels better to leave it up to everyone else but I do love the idea that they get to be together and happy <3 Padmé apologizes for something she both doesn’t need to apologize for (having a husband, not loving Sabé back in that way immediately) and needs to apologize for (implicitly asking Sabé to get the surgery to remove the flowers for the optics of it all)

and then they do get together and Sabé has a trump card for literally everything ever but also they’re ridiculously in love <33333

[filmnoirsbian]

i dont know who else to turn to in asking something like this and i know its probably left of field of what you normally get but like what do you do when you know you'll never get closure? how are you supposed to move on? after a series of incredible terrible events irl last year that would require tws to explain most of my friends abandoned me for being too erratic and being unable to explain myself, some of them by dropping a wall of text of all my wrongdoings theyd never brought up before ever in the most vague way possible and then blocking me. part of me still wants to apologize but it was all so vague and my memory is so bad i dont know what i did and i dont expect them to believe that. i also have no way of even contacting them if i could figure out how to apologize for it. so like. i guess im asking is what do you do when you did something terrible you cant remember and will never learn and can't apologize for? how do you move on from something like that?

While not exactly the same as your situation, I have experienced something similar (in the vein of doing harmful things I do not/will never remember, and having to come to terms with the fact that I did and that other people involved are never obligated to forgive me nor will I probably ever be able to apologize). For various reasons (drug abuse, mental illness, etc) this is a reality that quite a few people might have to face and I think the only way to really do that is to acknowledge it happened, and do your best to not let it happen again. This might mean behavioral changes, lifestyle changes, or anything else you can actively do both for yourself and those around you. What I'll say is that you have several options ahead of you. You can do your best to somehow reach out and apologize, which your friends may or may not accept. Or you can allow them their distance and move forward on your own, hopefully learning and growing from this admittedly suckass experience, and building new, healthier friendships in the future. I know it sounds silly but you move on by moving on. I'm not saying you have to ignore or forget about this information, tbh I don't think you should, but instead place it aside with the knowledge that you may have fucked up in the past (who hasn't?) but you can always do better. Every day is just a series of choices to be better than you were, to do better than you have. Closure is honestly very rare. Real life is filled with loose strings and messy endings. But wallowing in guilt and regret and what ifs is almost always detrimental to growth. You can feel sorry--I certainly did, and likely always will--but extend yourself the amount of grace it takes to stand up and keep moving forward, knowing that the best apology, even if they never see it, is in not committing the same hurts.

[aziraphales-library]

Hi im not sure if this is where i can ask for this since i am not looking for a specific fic. I read two fics recently where aziraphale commits sins or falls. Both of them are after the apocadidnt. I want to find more fics with that. One of the fics was The Fifth World by Kita Kitsune (it's a supernatural Xover) and I didn't save the name of the other one.

Hello. We have some fics like this on our #fallen angel aziraphale tag, and I’ve got a few more now...

Falling Without Style by orphan_account (T)

We all have things we've regretted doing while drinking. For Aziraphale, Falling was one of them. Also known as: what the fuck did I do last night.

Betwixt and Between by milhouse (T)

Falling may feel like an eternity, although it really only lasts for a few seconds.

Ourselves under pressure by jessikast (T)

A thought coalesced in the back of Crowley’s head.

If someone was falling, you could catch them.

***** “Is there anything…that is to say, do I have any other, um, physical changes?” Aziraphale asked, simultaneously rolling up his sleeves to look at his arms, twisting to try to look at his own back and managing to turn in a circle, nearly stumbling over his feet.

Crowley looked at him critically. “Are you usually that short?”

*****

Aziraphale thinks about too much philosophy; Crowley catches him when he starts to fall.

The Bitter Chill of Being Forsaken by Cardinal_Daughter (T)

“Well I’ll be damned,” Aziraphale said once.

Eleven years later, he is.

wherever you are, i'll come to you by mutalune (T)

“Are you alright? What’s all this about then?”

“Ah. Well. I might have slipped.”

“Slipped?”

“Took a bit of a tumble, I’m afraid,” Aziraphale said. “But, well. What’s done is done.”

“What’s done - ?”

“Now that I’m no longer beholden to a rather arbitrary moral code, I have to ask: Do you pay taxes? Actually, more importantly, do you think I can stop paying taxes now? That seems like a sufficiently demonic thing to do. Refusing to do my civic duty and whatnot. Quite devious, I’d argue.”

This was, in hindsight, not the most sensitive way of breaking the news.

beelzebub has a devil put aside for me by unbreakable_groundriot (M)

He does not saunter vaguely downward so much as he plummets in a barely controlled spiral.

He had felt it coming. Her Grace was slowly pulled from his body as if She was unraveling a loose string on an expensive sweater. He felt hot and cold all at the same time. There's a sudden stench of brimstone and butyric acid. The ground beneath him starts to grow hot. It's coming.

"Crowley, love, I need you in here." His voice does not waver.

And I think this is the fic you mention in your ask, but as always, correct author names or actual links are very helpful!

The Fifth World by Kisnau (M)

The Mayans predicted that The Fourth World would come to an end on December 21, 2012; the same Prophesized date for Michael and Lucifer's Final Battle. Team Free Will finds itself working with the queerest pair of unlikely allies, but, caught between angels and demons with No God In Sight, victory won't come easy. SPN-GO crossover AU. Slash.

That last one has a lot of tags, please read them!

- Mod D

[strawberry-jammers]

One Year

a dreamsmp x reader where a young (y/n) wants to rebuild an old old kingdom before they hace to be crowned to rule over their parents kingdom. with the help of their friends and a couple of servents, they hope to rebuild it all withought their parent knowing about it.

part 2

part 1/?

masterlist

The lovely @acidicvolt edited this!

the pronouns are he/him till age 17 where they're they/them

word count:4,400

----------

Age 9:

(y/n) ran around the castle with his friend Tommy, holding a bunch of flowers in our hands. 

“Where's he at!?” Tommy yelled, looking into every room. “Calm down! We’ll find him!!��� he says, still running ahead of him. “Come on slowpoke!!” Tommy looked at (y/n), running quickly after seeing him far ahead of himself. 

“COME BACK HERE!!” (y/n) laughed, running further ahead.

(y/n) ran into the garden, coming across Techno and Wilbur. They were practicing with swords today, as to where they would normally practice hand to hand combat.

He ran up to Techno, who wasn't doing much as they were just starting another round. (Y/n) ran into Techno’s hip, making him wobble slightly. 

“Heh? What are you doing kid? Aren't you supposed to be with your parent?” he shook his head, grabbing some of the flowers that he dropped. 

“Nope! Mama Eret said I was allowed to hang out with Tommy today!” (y/n) says, smiling up at the tall man. 

“(y/nnnnn)!! You left me behind!!” he pouts, dropping some of the flowers (y/n) forced him to carry. 

“Tommy, you're dropping them!!” he says, running over to pick them up. 

“Well so where are you!!” 

The two friends bicker, picking up and dropping flowers as they talk. Wilbur walks over to pick up the fallen ones they can't seem to hold. 

“Both of you are dropping flowers. Why do you need them anyway?'' Wilbur asks, looking at the two 10 year olds. (y/n) smiled, running up to Techno again. 

“Techy we wanna braid your hair!!” he says, smiling up at him. Tommy runs over and smacks the other upside the head. 

“YOU wanted to braid his hair! Don't drag me into this!” 

(y/n) holds his head, nearly crying. 

“Tommy, don't hit your friends!!” Wilbur says, picking up the small child. 

“Put me down Wilby!!” Tommy says, thrashing his arms and legs. 

“Did you just call me Wilby!?” 

“Maybe I did!!”

Techno looked at (y/n) as the two brothers argued. He looked up at him as well. “This is why we don't have siblings.” (y/n) nods, dropping a flower or two. 

“So, you wanted to braid my hair?” the young boy smiles. 

“Wait can i!?''

Techno sighs, nodding. He smiles, walking over to the marble bench they had. The boy sat on the bench, ushering for Techno to sit in front of him. “Ugh, kids.” 

(y/n) laughed as Techno walked over to him, sitting in front of the bench. Techno took his hair out of the loose bun it was originally in, handing him the string that was holding it together. The younger smiled, taking it and sectioning his hair to start the braid. 

Tommy and Wilbur looked over to see them. (y/n) was peacefully humming a small tune that went nowhere, while Techno had his eyes closed humming a small beat.  Tommy thrashed some more, escaping Wilbur’s grasp. He ran over to the two of them, standing next to his friend as he braided Techno’s hair. Tommy leaned over and whispered to (y/n), “can i put the flowers in?” the other chuckled, nodding his head at his friend. Tommy smiled, grabbing the flowers he had once discarded, putting them in the braid as he saw fit. 

(y/n) braided the rest of Techno’s hair while Tommy put flowers in the already braided parts. Wilbur walked over to the three and watched as they worked. The two young boys put flowers in the braid as Techno talked about his week.

“Yknow, I’ve only kicked one orphan this week. Which is very impressive for me.” Techno says, nodding to himself slightly. (y/n) laughed, thinking what he said was absurd. “Techno don't tell the children that!” Wilbur says playfully.

 “Wilbur you're literally 17, you too are a child.” Philza says, entering the garden that they were all sat at. Tommy smiled, running over to his father. “Dadza!! Look what me and (y/n) did!” he says, pulling the old man over to Techno. (y/n) was finishing up the last of the flowers, making sure the braid was tied nice and tight. He grabbed one last flower and went over to face Techno, putting it behind his ear. “Perfect!!” he says, looking at his masterpiece. 

“Look, look!” Tommy says, showing Philza Techno’s hair. “Before you say anything, I was forced into it.” Techno says, standing up from his spot on the ground. Philza laughs at his friend, Wilbur, doing the same. “He's lying dad, I saw him humming with (y/n) as she braided it.” Techno lets out a “heh” as Philza starts laughing. “Betrayal! I didnt think my own student would do me like this!”  Techno says dramatically. Tommy and (y/n) start to collect the leftover flowers as the other three argue and laugh amongst themselves. 

(y/n) sat on the ground, making flower crowns with the leftover flowers. Tommy sat next to him, watching the boy work at the crown. “How do you know how to make that?” he asked, slightly amazed at his friend's creation. He didn't look up, still working on the crown. “Papa Eret showed me! They can make lots of things! Like clothes and such.” Tommy nods, watching his friend work, trying to memorize how to do it himself. Philza saw this, coming over to see (y/n) work on the flowers. 

“What are you doing kiddo?” he asked, crouching down to (y/n)s level. He smiled, gesturing to the flowers. “I'm making a flower crown!! It's for you!” Philza smiled, chuckling. “Really? Thanks kiddo.” he nodded, finishing up the crown. Once he did, he stood up, taking a Philza’s hat and replacing it with the crown. (y/n) smiled at their creation, putting the bucket hat on to his own head. Philza smiled, thanking the young boy. 

Time went on like this till it was sundown, messing with each other and using the many flowers they had for random projects. 

“Come on (y/n) we gotta go!” Eret said, coming by the castle to retrieve the young child. (y/n) ran up to Eret, hugging him. “ zaza!!” (y/n) says, standing back slightly. Eret looked at his young kid, smiling. “Hello sweetheart! Ready to go?” (y/n) nodded, grabbing his flower crown. “Yep! Lemme say bye to Tommy first!!” the boy says, running over to his friend. (y/n) hugged the boy, who looked very agitated from the hug. “Are you coming over to my place tomorrow?” he asked Tommy, who nodded his head. “Yeah, I can bring Tubbo as well!! He should be in the village tomorrow!!'' Tommy says, adjusting his own, not as neat, flower crown. (y/n) smiled, hugging Tommy again. “Okay, see you then tommy!” 

“That kid is so sweet” “Phil, you have poor taste in children.” “says the man who kills orphans.”

Age 11:

(Y/n) sat in the forest, humming to himself as he watched the bees and animals go around the forest. It was a bit past mid day, and the young prince had been out of there sense dawn, taking in the beauty of the forest. 

He was in the village close to their kingdom, wanting to spend time outside of the castle. He loved natur, especially flowers, plants and such. He also loved animales. (y/n) loved everything about the outdoors, enjoying the peace he had that day.

Tubbo was a village boy, moving from town to town, never really having a set home. He did love traveling and being with his guardian was amazing, he just wished he had friends and a set place to stay.

Tubbo walked along the forest, following the bees that would fly around him, wondering if he was a flower or not. He followed them distractingly, reaching a clearing in the forest. He looked around to see where he was, soon realizing he was lost. He had gone too far from a recognizable area, and now didn't know how to get home. He knew Puffy would be mad at him for getting lost, but he couldn't do anything about it. He had already committed the lame chrome.

Tubbo looked around to see some sheep run away from him, along with the bees buzzing around him. He also spotted a young boy, (y/n), sitting against a tree taking in the beauty of it all. Tubbo went over to the young boy, trying to be as kind as possible, like Puffy said. 

“Hello!! I'm Tubbo! Mind if I join you?” Tubbo asks the older boy. (y/n) nodded, moving slightly to show Tubbo he could sit down next to him. Tubbo smiled, following such. “Hi, im (y/n). I haven't seen you in the village before, you new around here?” he asks, picking at the grass around him. “Yeah! Me and aunty Puffy travel a lot, so I never really stay in the same place. Have you lived here a long time?” Tubbo asks, making the young prince chuckle. “No, I live in a kingdom nearby.” Tubbos eyes glisten, he gasps. “Wait, are you the prince!??!” Tubbo asks excitedly. (y/n) nodded, not minding the question. 

“Yeah, I lived there my whole life! What's it like traveling? I rarely leave the castle so I've never explored outside this village and the kingdom.” (y/n) says, looking at the young boy. Tubbo smiles. “Well traveling could be fun, yet very lonely. I haven't had a friend in years, having had traveled so much since then. I do love seeing all the cool sights and how different villages work though!” (y/n) nodded, enjoying the interaction he was having. 

The two of them talked till it reached dawn, the sun slowly disappearing. 

“Dang, we better get going! Do you know your way back?” (y/n) asked, standing up and dusting himself off. Tubbo stood up as well. “No, I kinda got lost…” Tubbo says. (y/n) nodded, grabbing the other boy's hand, guiding him through the forest. “Well, I know the way back! I'll take ya there!”

Tubbo nodded, letting the prince guid him back to the village. They continued to talk as they went through the forest. Tubbo talked all about bees, one of the few constants in his life. 

(y/n) and Tubbo finally reached the village, it officially being dark out. Thankfully, there were lights all around, so they were still able to see and get around easily. “Damn, it's too dark to get back...dads gonna kill me.” (y/n) says, looking around. Tubbo gaps, grabbing the prince. “You can stay with me tonight!!! Sleepover!!” he says, grabbing the prince and dragging him back to the house Tubbo was staying at. “You don't have to let me stay, I can find my way back!” Tubbo shook his head, stopping. “No, we’re friends now and you're staying with me and aunty Puffy!” 

(y/n) sighed, letting the young boy take them to his home. 

It didn't take them long to reach the boys home, for it wasn't too far from where they exited from the forest. Tubbo let go of (y/n)’s hand, knocking on the door before opening it and walking inside. “AUNTY IM BACK!!'' Tubbo says, making sure Puffy knew it was him coming home.

Puffy walked out of one of the rooms, walking up to the young boy. “Oh Tubbo! You made me worried there kiddo!” Puffy says, hugging the small boy. She looked over to see the young prince, noticing him standing awkwardly in the doorway. “Oh! Tubbo, did you make a friend?” she asked, letting go of the small boy. Tubbo nodded, going over to the young boy. “This is (y/n)! Is it alright if he stays here tonight since it's too dark to go back to the castle??” Tubbo asked, latching onto his friend. Puffy gasped, looking at the two of them. “The castle???” she asked. (y/n) nodded, smiling slightly. “Yep! So..can I stay here tonight?” he asked the older lady. 

Puffy of course agreed, letting the boy stay for the night. She even offered to take him back to the castle in the morning. He declined, not wanting to burden the lady more than he already has.

Tubbo took (y/n) back to his room, showing him all the cool things he had gotten from their travels. Apparently, Puffy was a pirate captain and would travel the seas and such. She would stop at different villages to get supplies and give their nephew breaks from being at sea all the time. It was a coincidence that they had stopped at the village closest to his mothers kingdom.

“Oh oh, this ones from a neighboring kingdom!” Tubbo says. Showing the prince something from the kingdom his friend Tommy lives in. “That's the minecrafts kingdom!! I'm close friends with one of the princes! Did you like it there?” Tubbo gasps, both of them getting overly excited. “Wait, are you friends with tommy!? I met him when I was there last month!!” Tubbo says, putting down the trinket. “You know tommy!? We should all hangout sometime!!” 

Puffy heard their conversation, happy Tubbo was finally making some friends. However, they would be leaving soon and wouldn't be able to stay longer than they already are. Puffy sighed, sad that this is how things had to be.

The next day, (y/n) left back to the castle, hoping to keep in touch with Puffy and Tubbo. Tubbo was sad his friend had to go back, but still happy he had made a friend. Puffy was just sad she had to tell Tubbo they would be moving again. She couldn't stay in the same place in fear his father would catch up to them and take the boy away. 

Of course, the three boys were able to meet up. It took them several months, but once Tubbo made his way back to the village he and (y/n) met up at, they were able to make a plan to see each other. 

The three of them hit it off, immediately becoming close friends with a strong bond. 

At one point, Puffy let Tubbo stay with Tommy in his castle for a summer, allowing the three boys to see eachother once more.

Of course, this came to an end when Tubbo had to eventually leave with his aunt, leaving the two boys, who hadn't been able to hang out after tommys schedule had gotten more and more packed. 

The three of them hadn't seen each other for years, hoping one day it would go back to old, where they were just kids and were able to hang out at least once.

Age 17, present day: 

“You're gonna have to rule the kingdom soon (y/n)” Eret says, sitting down in the said childs room. (y/n) turned to him, no longer focusing on the crafts they were working on. “But I don't wanna rule the kingdom. It's just not my thing…” they say, turning to their parents. “I know I know, but there's no one else that can take over.” (y/n) nodded, turning to the flower crown they were previously working on. “I get that...i just wanna go back to a time where i could just hang out with my friends..ruling the kingdom means that time is completely over..” Eret nodes, walking over to his kid. “I know, I thought the same thing when I was younger. Though Tommy is busy with a war and Tubbo has been travelling non-stop for years, they've already changed.” they sigh. “It's been so long, they don't even know who i am anymore! The last time I saw them I was still a guy. It's just frustrating…” They get up from their seats, hugging their mother. “I just wanna see them...” 

The next day was spent learning more about their kingdom, knowing when they turn 18 it would be theirs. They sighed, reading over some of the history books their ren (another term for mother or father) had kept for all these years. They opened a new book, wanting to read the contents inside. 

They opened it to see a piece of paper fall to the ground. "Didn't think the pages were that old…" They crouched down, picking up the fallen paper. They stood up, puzzled by the page. 

"It's not from this book," they looked closer at the piece of paper, "what's lmanburg..?" They sat down, reading over it. 

Apparently, lmanburg was an old kingdom, long since destroyed. It fought for peace, and independence. Unfortunately, a small group of people went and destroyed the kingdom, leaving nothing but a pile of rubble and long forgotten ideals. 

(Y/n) looked over it once more, seeing the kingdom's location on the bottom of the page. They shot up, running to their room. 

They flung open the door, running to their desk. They throw off the unwanted items from their desk, placing the paper in its place. They sit down, opening a drawer and grabbing some paper and a pen. 

They look over the page on lmanburg one more time, then proceeding to write a letter to their old friends. 

"Dear Tommy, It's been a long time since we've talked hasn't it? There's many things we need to catch up on, but that should be saved for a later date. 

As you know, I will rule my mothers kingdom soon. I will be crowned their majesty in 1 years time, and I wanted to do something fun before then. 

I found a story on an old, destroyed kingdom called lmanburg. I wanna go visit it and maybe even bring it back to its former glory. I know it's a lot to want to accomplish in only a year, but that's all the time I have. 

I would be grateful if you could join me in this adventure I'm pursuing. Here is where we'll meet and when. I'll be asking our old pal Tubbo as well. 

I hope to see you then

                    -your old friend 

                             (Y/n)"

They did the same for Tubbo, telling him of their plan along with where/when to meet them if he agrees to come on their journey. They sighed, knowing they might have to go on this alone. Nevertheless they wrapped both letters in separate envelopes, ready to be shipped to their recipients. 

(Y/n) walked out of their room, looking around the castle for one of their few servants. 

"Are they on break right now? I can't find any of them.." They say, going down different halls to find someone who could mail the letters. 

"Oh, (y/n)! What are you looking for?" Karl asks, one of the few servants in their castle. (Y/n) sighes, happy that they finally found someone. "Karl, I need you to send these letters. You know where to find Tommy, but Tubbo will be harder to catch. Can you send them please?" They ask, handing Karl the letters. "Of course! I'll send them as soon as I'm free!"

(Y/n) thanks Karl, going back to their room. Plopping on their bed they sigh, hoping their friends would accept their invitation. 

The next day they started packing for the trip. It wasn't for another week or so, but they just wanted to be prepared. They were also kinda excited as well. 

They hadn't told Eret yet, fearing what they might say. (y/n) knows she loves them, but they had been under alot of stress as of late and didnt wanna make it worse. 

“I do need to tell them…” 

“Tell who what?” (y/n) jumped a bit, seeing Eret in the doorway. He walked in, standing by the desk. “Oh, hey..” (y/n) says, standing awkwardly by their bed. Eret looked down at the bag they were packing. He had a puzzled expression on his face. “Why are you packing? You're not running away are you!? I mean, if so, you're doing a bad job…” (y/n) sighed, closing the bag. “I'm not running away...kinda.” they say, sitting on their bed. “I was planning on going on an adventure, actually. I'm gonna rule the kingdom in a year and I wanted to do something fun before I did so..” 

Eret nodes, smiling. He goes over and sits next to their kid. “What are you planning to do on your adventure? You seem very excited for it, seeing as you've actually packed for something.`` They both laugh slightly. “Well,” (y/n) gets up, going over to their desk, grabbing the paper they had found in Eret’s old history books. They walked back over and showed Eret the paper, “there's an old old kingdom called lmanburg. Apparently it was a thriving kingdom, but one day it fell to the ground. Fascinating isn't it?” Eret reads it over, frowning slightly. “(y/n) i don't want you going to this place.” (y/n) was baffled. They didn't understand why they weren't allowed to go to this place. It was super old, it's not like anyone would still be there. It was forgotten about. 

“What do you mean? It's long forgotten and I would be bringing my friends! It's not like I'd be alone and ill prepared.” Eret sighed, standing up. “(y/n), lmanburg is a breeding ground of monsters and such, i don't want you getting hurt.” they in response stood up, coming up short to the tall person in front of them. “I know that! I've been training for years, I can handle monsters! Also, again, I won't be alone! I'd have Tommy and Tubbo with me and their great fighters!” Eret looked at them quickly.

“Tommy and Tubbo are going??” (y/n) nodded, stepping back slightly. 

“I need to contact Philza and Puffy, you're not going on this adventure and that's final!” Eret walked out of the room, dropping the lmanburg paper on the ground.

“Wait what!? Mom you can't!!” they say, walking behind their father. 

“Because, I don't want you going to that place! You're not changing my mind on this.” (y/n) slows down, completely baffled by this. They knew there was a chance they wouldn't be able to go, but they didn't think he’d act like this.

“R-ren please! I need this, I haven't seen them in so long please!!” Eret turned to them briskly. “Sweetheart, this is final. I don't want you going to that place! Stop pushing it.” Eret continues his way down the castle as (y/n) stopps in their tracks. They were shocked, really looking forward to this trip as a last resort of still being young and free from ruling.

They looked around, running back to their room. They slipped at the door, running too fast and nearly falling. They fumbled to the desk, once again grabbing paper and a pen from the desks drawers. They sit in the desk chair, fumbling with the paper and closing the drawer quickly. They quickly write a letter to Tommy and Tubbo.

They write that there would be a change of plans. Their mother wouldn't let them go to the wrecked kingdom, so they wouldn't be able to tell their parents and would have to sneak to the old kingdom.

They added more to the plan, sealing up the letters in envelopes and booking it out of their room, grabbing their bag and paper on lmanburg. They ran down the hall, making sure not to run into Eret while looking for Karl. They looked around, still not finding the man they needed.

They looked in the smaller dining hall, spotting the brunette walking towards the entrance. “Karl, Karl! Have you sent the letters yet?” they asked, walking up towards the male. “No I haven't, I actually was about to send them out now! What did you need?'' I smiled, sighing. “Oh thank god...i need those letters back, My ren won’t let me go to the old kingdom of lmanburg, and i don't want him finding out im still going…” Karl’s eyes widened. “Your lying to the king? I know their your parent but thats the KING!” (y/n) shushed Karl, taking him all the way back to their room. 

Once they arrived, (y/n) closed the door, looking at Karl. “You cannot tell my mom! I'm trusting you with this, okay? I'm going on this trip, and i need those letters back so i can deliver them myself.'' Karl steps back. “Whoa whoa whoa, you're delivering these letters alone? No no, you're going with someone on this. Maybe you could bring Niki! I know she isn't busy since there are a few other bakers in the castle!” Karl suggests, handing the old teen the letters. (y/n) considered this, knowing they should probably bring someone along.

(y/n) nodded, agreeing to bring someone with them. “Okay, I could bring Niki if she would agree to go. Promise you won't tell him I'm sneaking out?” Karl nodded. “I promise! We’ve known each other long enough for us to keep secrets for one another! Want me to go tell Niki?'' Karl asked, heading towards the door.

“Yes, tell her to meet me here at midnight. I don't want ren knowing about this at all.'' Karl nodded, smiling at the prince and heading off to go see the pink haired baker.

The teen waited, taking a nap so they were able to sneak out at night. They knew it was probably too soon to start the expedition, and that their father probably knew where to find them. They just couldn't wait any longer.

The sun was slowly falling from the horizon, getting darker and darker by the second. (Y/n) had taken their place at the window, looking at the sky getting darker and darker, the stars showing more prominently as time went on.  They sighed, looking over at their door. 

It wasn't time for the two servants to show up, but they did wish they were able to just go out and seek out lmanburg freely. It wasn't like that however, they knew they couldn't do everything they wanted, they just hoped their mother would support them in this. 

They looked back outside, letting the time pass for when they would meet up with Niki and leave the castle for a whole year. 

So there they waited. Hopefully everything went according to the new plan. 

[retcon-writing]

the drabble in which Haru serenades monsoon (kinda)

don’t look at me yeah im basically writing a monsoon route no i dont want to talk about it

The night is cool, only barely touched by the promised chill of autumn. The fields of grasses are open and stretched wide, each blade swaying with the breeze and rippling like water. It is a quiet place, away from the endless noise of the city. Tranquil. Isolated.

 A forest surrounds the town below and the surrounding farms, and the trees, still verdant and green during the day, seem heavier now; weighed down by moonlight and shadow. It is here Haru finds himself, seated on the veranda of this gentle land that reminds him so much of his old home. His feet dangle in the air; his fingers pluck delicately at strings, notes drifting out and into the night.

 His lips form words delicately, weaving and spinning them together into threads of memory and gentle magic; a performance for none but himself. He sings of past and present—of home, of harmony—and the words on his tongue are lifted and carried and cradled by the wind and the world itself. The breeze through the grass is a whistled accompaniment, the rustle of leaves a drum, and the power of the song invigorates the sleeping earth around him.

 The moon is shining brighter, he thinks, after the song dies in his throat. Or perhaps the world itself simply seems brighter after such a tune.

 “Lovely.”

 Haru inclines his head to the voice but does not turn. “I thought you were going to sleep?”

 “Seemed a shame to waste such a lovely night,” his companion says before moving to sit next to him. Close. Close enough that their thighs touch at the sides. “Besides, I said so while under the impression you would be joining me.”

 Haru laughs, and it is a gravelly thing; rough and worn from age and smoke, sharp in a way his singing is not. “My apologies. I didn’t mean to keep you.”

 “Mmm.” The man hums vaguely. “It’s a lovely song. The one you sang, I mean.”

“I didn’t think you took much interest in my singing, Monsoon,” Haru says, a touch of teasing.

“It’s your companions’ I have little interest in. Yours, I’ll admit, has been growing on me.”

“Is that so?”

Monsoon smirks. “Yes. Rather like mold, I suppose.”

Haru winces—although Monsoon jests, there is nonetheless a certain bite to the jape. “You are cross with me after all. I should have known.” He looks over at Monsoon then, taking in the sight of him. Committing his face to memory once again. A delicate smirk plays at the corner of the man’s mouth, stretching his lips thin. His hair is twisted into a loose braid over his shoulder that shimmers in the moonlight. It’s damp, leaving an ever-growing wet spot on the thin robe he wears.

Haru encircles Monsoon’s hand with his own free one, rubbings gentle circles into the cool flesh. “You must be cold tonight. With the breeze and all.”

Monsoon seems to fold into himself, drawing his legs up and in. “Being chilled is normal for me.”

“So delicate….”

“Shut up.” Monsoon says it without malice, leaning ever-so slightly against Haru’s warmer frame. They stay there a moment, silently resting on each other. Savoring the touch of their skin through cloth. Making up for the moments they’ll part; for the moments Haru leaves and Monsoon doesn’t follow. They stay together long enough that the fabric of Haru’s shirt beginnings to grow damp itself.

“Shall we sleep out here,” Haru suggests. “It is, as you said, a lovely night.”

“Do not be ridiculous.” Monsoon brushes errant strands of Haru’s hair back, tucking them behind his ear. “You’ll have plenty of nights to sleep in the dirt and elements soon enough.”

“Hmm.” Haru sighs, allowing his eyes to drift shut when Monsoon’s fingers linger on his face. Feeling him trace patterns between the newly-formed freckles from last summer’s sun. There are new wrinkles now too, an etched mark of yet another year come and gone, but Monsoon does not comment on them. Haru is glad for it.

“Would you sing it again for me? That song from before.”

“You liked it?”

Monsoon nods, moving away again. “Very much so. It reminded me… well, it reminded me of home, I suppose. Though I’m certain I’ve never heard it.”

Haru smiles despite himself and once again places his fingers on strings. “Of course. What sort of bard would I be, to let my favorite audience member down?”

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

Amiright?

Summery- 2.1k. Colin x Y/N. A fun night out brings up some questions. So this was written for @official-and-unstable-satan​ gif challenge. If you wanna participate, head on over and join in, more then happy to nominate you if you desire. I did break the rules a bit with that opening gif, but it does appear before the final gif. Im not much of one to follow the rules, sorry peeps. I roll my own way. 

You and Colin had a easy relationship. It was never really all that serious, you two never even made it “official”. The two just melded one day into this more then best friends with benefits, you were his unofficial girlfriend, a term you thought yourself to be. You unfortunately would freeze up at the idea of official girlfriend, i mean... thats to serious, isnt it?

 He looked out for you, and you looked out for him. Long days at work, he would surprise you with your favorite take out spread on the coffee table, and then you would sit between his legs, his arms wrapped around you while you both played the newest video game. He would make it out like you totally kicked his ass, stealing kisses and nibbles when he wanted to distract you and usually before the night was done, the video controllers were forgotten for a quickie on the couch, often times the video games music was your new sexy time theme song. 

Then other times, he would drag you out of the apartment. His grin boyish as he insisted you change from your work outfit, unbuttoning your blouse and running a hand over the lacy cups of your bra. “Fuck I love this number on you, when we come back, I should peel you right out of this with my teeth.” Your breath hitched, you would like that very much. Placing a kiss to your lips, he smirked “but not right now. I have something else in mind. Something sporty lil minx.” 

“Where are we going?” You question, digging through your closet. “Im not sure of how to dress!”

“Anything babe! Comfy clothes!” He went into the closet you currently were a bit lost in, and reached over you to grab your sweat pants and a tshirt. You look at them with an arched brow and snort while taking them. “You high classing me up Stud?” 

He winked as he pulled on his old beat up grey zip up. “You know it sexy, aint no one got nothing on you.” 

Laughing, the two of you stumble out the door and his arm wrapped around you your waist, holding you in against his side, you followed him along, chatting a bit about your day since he wasnt spilling what the two of you were doing.

But soon enough you two came up to the local gymnasium and he dug out a key from his pocket, unlocking the doors and slipping in. As the two of you walked in, a few lights sprung on and you wiggled out of his hold and sprang forward to do a cartwheel, landing half hazardly back on your feet. “Ta-Da!” giggling as you reach up to pull your hair back into a ponytail, snapping the band you kept around your wrist around. Colin grabbed a nearby basketball and lazily dribbled it as he sauntered towards you across the court. “How did you get the key to this place?”

“I know a guy who knows a guy, who needed a gig played this weekend. Figured we needed a night out baby, and what better then playing Horse?” Another dribble and you put your hands to your hips watching him, you were always down for the thrill of the challenge. Competitive little minx that you are. And he was right, you two had been holed up in the apartment for a tad to long. 

“Well lets make it interesting Colin.” you state, holding your hands out for the ball. “Every missed shot, we get to pick something to loose.” He cocked a brow and raked his eyes over you. “Game on babygirl.“ He tossed you the ball ,and smirked, watching as you picked your spot. Off to the left side of the court, along the edge, you dribble a few times and then with a small jump, flick of your wrist, you sent the ball flying, and hell you made this shot a hundred times growing up. That ball gave a sweet sweet swish snap, and Colin rolled his eyes. “easy, I got this.” Jogging for the ball, he swooped it up and zig zagging over to you, showing off, you step from where you stood while he went to make his shot. 

“Its harder then it looks” you claim, and he winks. 

“Im winning this baby, your gonna look awful good running around all bare ass naked in here while I claim my trophey.” And sure enough he to made the shot. 

“Oh you think your gonna get that far? Whats your trophey?” 

“Why your panties of course.”

Oh fuck, game on boy, you thought and grabbing the ball, you chose your next spot, further away, towards the middle of the court. When you went to make your shot, he snapped your ass with his palm, making you squeek and shoot it way off, not even hitting the back board. “COLIN!” His laughter echoing as he tugged on your shirt. “Off it comes!” 

“That was cheating you bastard” you stick your tongue out as you jerk it over your head and toss it over his shoulder. He grasped your chin and drew your teasing tongue into his mouth, wrangling a moan from you before releasing you.

"Fighting dirty is encouraged babygirl, I thought you knew that" you narrowed your eyes at him as he jogged for the ball, the bouncing echoing while he assessed where he wanted to shoot from. Once he picked, you sauntered in front of him, leaving enough space so he could shoot, but you knew what could distract him. Since they distracted him 20 times a day without even trying. His hand was always snaking up your shirt to play with your breasts. 

Just as he was about to shoot, your hands shot up and giving a luscious lip parting, moan, plumping the swells together, his eyes immediately fell from the hoop to where they were spilling over the top, and sure enough his shot went WAY WAY off the mark. A drop of your hands and the wiggle of the brows, you snicker. 

“Loose the shirt hot stuff!” You tug on his hoodie, and pull down the zipper for him, leaning up to catch his lips in a kiss, fully meant to draw his focus from the game. Tiny nips, flick of the tongue trailing over his full bottom lip and then pulling away before he can get the satisfaction of tasting your kiss. A frustrated groan fell from his chest, and he shrugged off the shirt. 

The back and forth was fierce. Colin got the satisfaction of getting the next few shots, and much to your disdain at this, you shed off your belt, pants and one sock. He did let you keep on one sock, how sweet of him. While you were following along behind him, hooking your hand into his belt loops and tugging on him from behind as he takes a random jumping shot, falling back into you. 

“Ha, you missed baby, Pants, they are finally mine!” 

He doesnt even hesitate to unzip them and tug them off, a smirk playing off his mouth. 

So his next statement threw you off axis, put a pause to your laughter, tilted your whole world off kilter. You dont know why it would scare you so much. 

“My girlfriend is free to take my pants off whenever she pleases.” With a toss he shot them in the pile of clothing you accumulated. 

But you couldnt see that, he called you his girlfriend, girlfriend. You werent anything, never have been. 

“What? Im not your girlfriend.”

He just looked at you a bit weird and picked up the ball. “Of course you are Y/N, we practically live together now, Im just waiting for my lease to end on my apartment.” 

“Oh no buddy.” Your hands go to your hips with a shake of the head “We never said we were anything.” Pointing between the two of you, good mood gone as his face turned serious listening to you. 

“Then what has this all been? You cant tell me nothing Y/N, its been like a year” You already had turned on your heels. You werent running away, no, not at all. You werent terrified that he might have cared about you more then in a friendly way, although you both know thats the biggest mother fucking lie you told yourself in that moment when he was saying your name, trying to get an answer. 

Your gathering your clothes when he grasps your arm. “Will you just stop for a moment Y/N and talk to me?” 

“I cant, I got to work tomorrow.” You lamely make an excuse, fuck work. 

“You know, I knew I god damn knew you would pull this shit Y/N the minute I said it was anything. You know why? Your so damned scared of actually wanting something, you wont say it. Think its gonna blow all up in your face, amiright?” His words running together as you wrench your arm out and you glare at him. 

“Im not the one who just assumed anything asshole.” Your temper flaring to hide anything other then what you really want to say. And you leave Colin standing there in shock, in the middle of the gymnasium, the lights glaring over him and you resolve not to look back as you slam out the door, but you hear him, a string of cusses following you outside in his anger and your name, your name calling you back, to not run away. But run away you did. 

He didnt come back that night, not to your apartment, you heard the slamming of his door across the hallway and you curled up in bed feeling completely miserable about what had happened, how you reacted and maybe he was right, you had some kind of commitment issue after years of self esteem issues. Ones he always talked you through. 

“Babes your so damn smart, what would I do without you?!” Helping him put together a lyric for his music, the words would just come to you. 

“Come on, its not that bad, let me read.” Sneaking a peek over your shoulder at a short writing piece you were indulging yourself in. 

“Kicking ass and taking names” High fiving you after a particularly difficult boss in the video game. 

“Baby you eat today? How about a grilled cheese?” on those days you just couldnt get your shit together and remember to feed yourself. A water bottle being tossed at you. 

“God damn your so beautiful” Early morning wake ups, his arm locking you in close, and not allowing you to leave him for a few moments. A kiss to your shoulder and light nibble to your neck before you really had to start the day. 

It hurt he wasnt there now, the bed felt hollowed and you buried your face in the pillow. Why did you do this to yourself? He tried to text a few times, but you bypassed them, not having an answer for him. He would want one, Curtis didnt just let things go. ‘what are you never going to talk to me again?’ was his last one. Then the phone went silent.  

 The night turned into days, and it turned into the longest three damn days you could recall. Then the third night as you were nursing a beer, secretly listening for the door across the hall, there was a knock, a soft rapt that made you spring up out of your seat. Setting the bottle aside, you unlocked your door and peered out. Opening the door wider, there was Colin, not in his usual band tees, and jeans, or that stupid zip up you missed, no he was dressed up, tie and everything. 

“Hi Y/n” he smiled, fidgeting a bit, he seemed so out of his norm. You shyly look down, picking at your rather unfancy attire. 

“Hi Colin, you look good” 

“Do I? I wouldnt know” He teased and reached out to lift your face with a tilt of his fingers under your chin. “But theres an important woman whom deserves it.” Your brows come together, clearly unsure of what he meant. “Y/N, I didnt mean to scare you off, I should have done this right, not just assume you wanted the same thing I did. Im hoping you do, but if you dont... then I will respect that. Will you date me, be my girlfriend?” 

Seeing him now, those uncalled for fears still lingered, but you wanted this. You wanted him, and the past few days showed just how much he actually meant to you, maybe you both were taking each other for granted. 

“Yes Colin, I cant believe you still want to after I was such an asshole” 

“Nah, you werent an asshole.” He stepped in closer, and kissed your forehead. “Okay, maybe a teeny bit, but I was a big dick for not talk to you about it, so that makes us pretty even right?” 

You laugh listening to him and tug on his tie, dragging him into the apartment. Fuck you missed this. 

@what-is-your-plan-today​ im just gonna tag you in everything till your like “STOP” lmao

[adrrianraines]

can’t speak the language that you need • adrian x mc

sensory prompt #37: the tender ache when you press against bruises.   song inspiration: if i—ross copperman

disclaimer: i wanted angst in that controlled love interest scene. where is it??? where??? so here it is! here’s how i imagined it would have been!! deadass just kidding im crying

YOU STARED BLANKLY up ahead as you zoomed like a phantom of the night in the streets of new york. the sinister look of rheya mouthing confidently that she’ll see you again kept playing inside your head like a badly orchestrated taunt from a cliched horror flick villain on repeat in a broken dvd player.

your hands gripped the steering wheel tightly as the unsuspecting city lights finally came to view. the illuminations and shadows the buildings emanated, the chatter and laughter of citizens going about their day, oblivious and ignorant to everything that’s happening felt nothing short of like a punch in the gut. it was too much that whenever your mind reels back towards the incident, you can feel your chest tighten, stomach churning and bile forming, the raw taste flooding your mouth.

you felt faint. you loathed how the trepidation just won’t go away. you wanted to cry out your frustration for the dire turn of the situation, wanting to desperately pin the blame on someone for the all the anger, fear, hopelessness and disappointment. whenever you blink, vivid images flashes, making you remember how rheya controlled your friends and commanded them against their will—the look of blood lust aimed right at you as bright as a neon paint being splattered on an empty canvas.

then after the rage, you felt nothing but exhaustion, hurt and apprehension as one face particularly struck you the most: adrian.

torment only consumed you further as you came to the most painful realization above everything else:

adrian almost killed you. without hesitation nor remorse.

you recall how terrifying it was to look at the face who showed you nothing but kindness slowly turn to a monster out for your demise. you recall how you stared into his eyes and not recognize the person who owns it. how he looked empty and hallow, like a puppet following its master’s strings. you recall the loss of hope that left a bitter pang when you tried calling out to him, trying to reason with the adrian that you knew, only for it to turn into a futile attempt of puny redemption.

the feeling of panic was lingering, wrapping your well-being like a blanket of breeze on a cold winter night. you blink and you remember the murderous look on his face, the way he bared his fangs at you, the way his hands wrapped around your neck, the sheer desire and craving to hurt you—of wanting your death.

you swallowed hard, millions of thoughts running rampant all at once as you trained your eyes on the road, shoulders tense and shaking. you quickly glanced towards your friends, all worn out and certainly out of it. realizing you drove far enough to be followed, you make a turn towards a dark and decrepit alley, parking the car on a curb. with the look of things, it was ideal to stop and collect yourselves first before proceeding blindly.

when the engine of the car died, you let out a sigh you realized you’ve been holding. you jumped in surprise when you felt someone’s hand on your thigh, the sensation goading a pleasantly unwelcome electric tingle on your skin. you turn to see adrian looking at you with regret and worry, mouth opening and closing at the same time, unable to find the right words to say. the visible flinch you showed because of his touch only made him remove his hand as quickly as it came, as if he just touched a burning flame.

realizing that you can’t look at him directly without remembering his murderous trance, you moved to get out of the vehicle for fresh air. maybe, just maybe, distancing yourself for a bit might be the most ideal thing to do that moment.

with a heavy heart, you marched towards the opposite side of the street as you unconsciously looked for anything to lean on, gaze frantic and unfocused. your breathing hitches and wild flashbacks of the day you died came back to haunt. it was the same amount of fear, a similar sensation, and yet entirely different at the same time.

you barely noticed your surroundings when your legs gave out, your sudden loss of momentum causing you to wobble. the world seemed to stop when you didn’t feel the hard concrete but instead a pair of strong arms wrapped around you, preventing your fall by catching you before you even hit the ground.

a familiar, calming scent wafted your senses which clouded your better judgment. the alluring lull of fierce security felt like loose threads tying itself again. you let out a shaky breath, feeling weak and drained to even struggle against his hold. adrian steadies you in front of him, arms holding you tight, the warmth of his presence both inviting and alarming.

you avoided his gaze as he tries to catch yours, the desperation on his features unparalleled. he remained quiet, as if he’s trying to assess things first before speaking. however, it didn’t take long until he finally got the answer that he was looking for. his eyes trailed your movement when you unconsciously touched your neck, precisely at the part where you felt his vice grip slowly snatching the life out of you.

you grunted at the tender ache that you felt, and he notices it—rather, he sees it vividly, the very product of his weakness. it was like watching a mirror slowly fall down and break to tiny pieces, each glass shattering to a thousand more. you did nothing but watch at how the weight of realization knocked the winds out of his sails with sheer terror washing over his countenance. the sadness and desperation on his face then turned to guilt and rage—not to you, but to himself, to what he did, to what he couldn’t do and to what he realized he was capable of doing. adrian couldn’t believe the depth of violence he caused.

his arms falls flat to his side, going limp and useless. he immediately took a step back, all signs of hope drifting further faster than a raging waterfall. yet under the faint glow of the streetlights, he still looked divine. if this was a normal situation, you would have laughed at yourself with how you’re still capable of such thoughts. however, you can’t even find your voice to speak, let alone bring yourself close to him. you wanted to badly touch him, to comfort him, to tell him it’s going to be okay. but you knew you’d be lying. you froze in place, unable to move, unable to do anything—your own fear becoming the burden you’re carrying.

“adrian... please...” you croaked out, wincing at how your voice was shaking. he shifted to his feet so he can step closer, his unsure movements an indication of his inner battles. his hands hang dead in the air, trying to reach you with words left unsaid. but he stopped midway when you instinctively took a step back. you didn’t know why, or how, but your body just moved. it’s as if it was protecting you from harm, as if it was on instinct, as if it recognized adrian as a threat.

“i did that... didn’t i?” his voice was quiet yet certain. he locked gazes with you before his eyes roamed to your cheeks, your lips, your jaw... and finally, towards your neck. and it was then that you witnessed how this was breaking him as much as it was breaking you as well. your chest clenched at how devastated he looked, how resignation reigned in his features. the color of life finally draining from his orbs—as if all of his nightmares finally came to life.

it shatters you to see how tired adrian looked and how exhausted he seemed, as if his age has finally caught up with him. he looked exposed. lost. vulnerable. helpless. like an empty shell of a man who touched many wars and took many lives. a warrior who was finally drowning from all the sins he committed in his entire lifetime.

“do i still deserve it? your heart...” he pauses and shakes his head. he let out a bitter laugh as his voice proceeds to quiver, then immediately breaks. “no... i... don’t... not anymore.”

and for the first time ever since you’ve met him, he looked defeated.

suffer with me laid ease!! @isabella-choices @dadrianraines @violinet

[chriscanwell]

New Post has been published on Develop Attraction

New Post has been published on https://www.developattraction.com/girlfriend-wants-single/

Girlfriend Wants to be Single — Make Her Want You Again

If your girlfriend wants to be single, this article will show you how to change her mind and want a relationship with you again.

But first, let’s take a look at an email from a reader who is having this problem in his own relationships. My answers can be seen below in bold.

(Note: Real names and personal information have been changed for privacy reasons.)

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Hi Chris, I was dating a girl who was also dating someone else. We kicked off through the end of their toxic relationship. We fell in what I believed to be love and formed an official relationship in secret. 

Her ex found out and got physically abusive towards her and threatened me. He wouldn’t leave her alone. She took off to South America alone for 3 months to get away from the situation. I was supposed to meet her but a few weeks in she asked me not to. She distanced herself but I was persistent in trying to make it work. Maybe too persistent. 

I think you sense where you went wrong here. If a girl is feeling stressed out and upset, she will pull away from all stressors and shut everything and everyone out until the stress is resolved. At this moment in time she would have been under extreme stress (caused by her ex boyfriend). As a result she decides to get her stuff and run-off to South America for a couple of months. If she asks you for space (even if you didn’t do anything wrong), you must give her space and respect her wishes. If you don’t listen to her, you will become another source of stress and she will pull away from you.

When she returned home she told me she had several sexual encounters with other people overseas and she realized she didn’t want to be in a relationship.

That’s pretty much a man’s worst nightmare isn’t it. His girlfriend runs off and she experiences all the sexual freedom of living in a place where no one knows her and she can do what she wants. 

She said she needs time to be single before moving into the next relationship. She’s since established that she doesn’t have feelings towards me. She’s tried to be friends. We had a drunken night out which lead to an argument then sex the other night but in the morning she pushed me away when I tried to get close and she told me she completely regretted it. She told a friend that she felt nothing and emotionless when we did it and just wants to be single. She’s 27 and I’m 34.

Unfortunately, the more sexual encounters a girl has the more benchmarks she has to measure you against. She has tasted freedom and independence and she equates that with fun and low stress. If you’re still chasing her, being relationship focused (arguing with her) and trying to get close to her, she will continue to push you away.

I don’t want to loose her. I’m trying to play it cool. Im hurt that she was intimate with other people but I’ve done the same in similar circumstances in a past relationship so I’m trying to empathize. 

I get it. It is hurtful. Especially as you would have considered yourself in a relationship of sorts with her when she went away. You think she’s going away to get away from her nasty ex and to escape from all her stress. In reality she goes to South America and has a bunch of sexual encounters, then comes back to you with low interest. It hurts. 

I’ve made the mistake in trying to encourage her to make it work between us and persisted a little too much to the point I asked to be friends with benefits. To which she said yes then regretted what she said the next day and said no. 

You must be given credit for understanding your mistakes and knowing where you went wrong—that’s half the battle when it comes to getting her back. Now it’s time to take corrective action.

Her trip has changed her and her outlook on life. She’s decided that she wants to move overseas next year. She’s completely lost interest and I don’t know what to do. She used to cry over how much she loved me and now she sees straight through me. I’m coming to the realization that I was a rebound but I know her feelings for me were real. What should I do and is there anything I can do to change her mind?

Simon

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She Used to Love You, What Happened?

You’re right. At the time, when she was crying over you, her feelings were real and genuine. You saw the tears, you saw how much she cared about you. It’s important to remember, however, that women only respond to their emotions in the present moment. Her feelings are like the wind—they change day-by-day.

One day a girl can think the world of you and be head-over-heals in love. The next day she can hate you and doesn’t want anything to do with you. 

When a girl says that she wants to be single and doesn’t want a relationship, that is a reference to her feelings for you.

Translated into plain English she is saying: I don’t want to be with you, your behavior is not attractive to me.

If a girl is attracted to you and you’re doing everything right, she will change her plans to go and live overseas. Women always put (valuable) relationships first. 

So here’s the predicament. Your girlfriend wants to be single, how do you change her mind?

She Wants to Be Single, Why?

This part is counter-intuitive. In this case, where your girlfriend was once attracted to you it’s not a physical issue or a problem with her being physically attracted to you. It’s a problem with your behavior.

She tells you that she wants freedom and independence, and you fear losing her. She notices your panic and neediness and continues to pull further away from you.

Your mind is spinning. What happened to that once sweet, loving girl who cried over you and got excited to see you?

You hang on to hope, hoping that she’ll change her mind and rediscover her feelings for you. But the more you try to change her, the more certain she is that she wants to remain single. 

One of my readers was in a similar situation to this not so long ago. His girlfriend told him that she no longer wanted a relationship and that she preferred being single. 

He started out trying to convince her that she was making a huge mistake. He tried to convince her that she still loved him. But the more he tried to convince her, the more she pulled away.

From her perspective, she saw him as a needy, desperate person who was trying to restrict her freedom.

After I consulted with this reader, he tried a different approach. Instead of trying to convince her to stay, he pushed her way.

He told his (ex) girlfriend that he thought it was great that she wanted to be single. She should live life and enjoy herself because he realized he wanted to do the same.

The moment he pushed her away, she drew her closer to him. He was no longer needy and desperate. He was no longer a source of stress. He was once again a free, independent, masculine man.

It was only a couple of weeks later that this girl changed her mind about wanting to be single. They first re-established a no-strings-attached sexual relationship. Having fun. Not talking about the relationship. Enjoying each others company.

It wasn’t long before she started having feelings for him again and push for a relationship.

Women Seek Relationships, Men Seek Freedom

As selfish as it might sound, women are the gatekeepers to sex and relationships. You can only have intimacy with a woman if she’s feeling it and she lets you. In the same way, you can only have a relationship with a woman, if she’s feeling it and she wants a relationship with you. In other words, it doesn’t matter if you’re ready for a relationship, it’s up to her. The only thing you can do, and the most important thing you can do is show up with the right attitude and behavior.

That behavior set includes the following:

— Don’t talk about the relationship

— Don’t be another source of stress

— Don’t seek commitment with her

— Encourage her to be single

— Focus on your own freedom

— Tell her you want to be single too

— Act in a masculine, confident way

You will need to get into the right mindset here. Remember, it’s a woman’s job to focus on relationships, it’s a man job to focus on freedom and his mission. 

She should be the one trying to convince you to be in a committed relationship with her, not the other way around.

If you subvert this natural dynamic, she will see you as weak and feminine in your behavior, and, as a result, she will get turned off by you and lose interest.

You need to become the attractive man that she was so in love with before. You need to go back to seducing her all over again. If you can do this, she will respond in a positive way.

It sounds counter-intuitive to push a girl away, especially when she asks for freedom. But it works a charm and is your best way to get her back.

Just remember she will test you on this. You can’t fake your feelings. You have to genuinely focus on other things besides her.

She is going to test you and see if you really do mean what you say. Do you really want her to be free? Do you really want freedom yourself? And are you really focused on your mission instead of being focused on her?

If she can see that you have taken the focus off her and put it on something else, she will feel free to come back to you.

The old adage applies here: if you want someone, set them free and see if they come back. It’s your only genuine shot at getting her back in this situation.