#im bawlin' my eyes out u gOise | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

grvntld · 7 months ago

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i know it has been a while but i hv to let this out—my gosh im not ready for this pain jusq why naman kailangan mamatay yung grandpa sa story tapos bAkeht kaya talagang binasa ko pa every detail nung struggle sa ospital like?¿?¿?¿ why am i putting myself through this pain?¿?¿¿

#it's just all too familiar my gawd #im bawlin' my eyes out u gOise #my mind kept coming back to my days with gramps in the hospital and all the days leading to his death #ang sakeht pota #😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i dont talk abt this that much anymore but honestly his passing is still so fresh to me #sometimes there is a split second in my brain na nalilimutan kong he is dead na like sasabihin ko #hmmm i miss gramps perhaps i should sched a visit sa house niya tapos iniimagine ko na na maaabutan ko #siya sa office table niya with all his files and pc and typewriter bc he was a lawyer—a great lawyer #and then theres just a voice in my head na magsasabing hey ains i think u forgot abt the part na he is dead na #like?¿?¿?¿??¿?¿?¿???? BAKEHT GANITEZ #ang strange kasi im vvv familiar with grief naman like i grew up with it pero until now im just sooooo ugh w it at times ykwim #ang taxing kasi basta ewan #need ko lang ilabas talaga kasi ang sikip na ng dibdib ko hayup #ay tapos i cant keep my mind off sa time na i had a flight to el nido tapos i was in my room sa maternal side of my fam #i was begging big g to not take gramps while i was away bc i dont think i will be able to carry myself well #so yung werq trip ko na yun sa el nido i was just completely zoning out at times #nag-iinterview ako tapos sobrang lutang i dont even know paano ko naitawid talking to the french chef huhuhuhuhu #okie enough na kasi iiyak lang ako nang iiyak nanaman #mwAps #hello how hv u guys been #sobra busy kaloka #sa ig kasi talaga ako nagdadaldal na hahahahahhahahahaha #kaya wala ako here matagal #bat may pag explain lol cnu ka ba CHARENG AHAHAHHAHAHA #donut

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