#ill feel really good about my eyeshadow and then ill get called ma'am or miss one too many times and i hate it.
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Chat. Maybe I need to be more masc. Idk.
#i like feminine things but i like them as like a man wearing makeup or jewelry yk. if that makes sense.#its hard at work bc i have like a uniform so i cant stretch around with how i look#ill feel really good about my eyeshadow and then ill get called ma'am or miss one too many times and i hate it.#maybe i should ask if i can get a pronoun pin or something. it will increase the chance of hatecrimes but maybe itll do something.#i dont wanna stop with the makeup and stuff bc i do like it#also not gonna cut my hair im gonna keep it exactly as is until it stops looking good.#i did start wearing pride bracelets i have to see if that might do anything#an old man noticed them and gave me the lead paint stare it was kinda funny in a way but i was so prepared for some ass comment#anyways i also had this thing happen in my brain where im like. conflicted. i want to look good but i do not want to be seen as an object.#there is a certain sexualization with trans people that i want to avoid. i am not an object.#its okay to just be pretty if that makes sense.#summary is. dressing for myself? very poggers.
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