#if you're asking me which era I love more.........After Mullet years.....he's just a big dilf goddd

[luxurysystems]

Consider if you will:

Irwin going from little athletic twink to beefcake because as Ted's sugar baby, he's actually eating well and Ted might be feeding him a bit extra cause he's as much a sucker as we are for him to be beefy as hell

Hi hello, so I'm glad that you brought this up because I've sorta discussed this topic before with my friends. This is just a lighthearted theory/"Lux's eyes are playing tricks on them" type ramble, so buckle up. (also big thank you to @bastard-irwin for help with the visual aids *muah* 🖤)

So to set up this theory of mine up properly, I have 2 categories that I place Irwin R Schyster in: Mullet years (M) and After Mullet years (AM).

During the Mullet years: (1991-early 1992 ?) Irwin looked like this-

lorge and lean, no doubt. The man was simply built for a run with the Intercontinental Championship, but I digress. I noticed that he was definitely angrier during this time? No nonsense, no time for smiles (except for chastising ones). He's running off pure caffeine, 4 hours of sleep, and hatred during the Mullet years.

However, when you compare this to the After Mullet years (92, 93-94),especially with Ted/Money Inc./The Corporation?

Lord have mercy, it's subtle, but-- "goddamn Ted what are you feeding your attack dog err-- accountant?? 🥵"??? Love and beef are stored in the tits, cheeks, and biceps, I suppose.

It's like if you hit ctrl+t in your editing software of choice and drag him out juuuusst wide enough, it's noticeable to sickos like me. Irwin was a lot more playful (<-I use this term loosely) around this time, especially during Money Inc promos. He smiled a lot more when making fun of opponents with his asshole millionaire boyfriend.

Going back to your ask, I can definitely see Ted taking care of Irwin in that way: making sure he eats proper meals, sprinkling some ICOPRO powder in his food when Irwin isn't looking, etc. He's just gotta make sure that Irwin has energy to...y'know...balance all of those books.