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ssa-montgomery · 3 years ago

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(Baby, We Both Know) That The Nights Were Mainly Made For Sayin' Things You Can't Say Tomorrow Day

Word Count: 3043

Summary: When the BAU check into a hotel late a shortage of rooms lead to Hotch and Y/N sharing a bed while hiding feelings for each other.

Characters: Hotch x GN!Reader

Warnings: Bed-sharing, mutual pining, fluff, hidden feelings, accidental cuddling, also some not so accidental cuddling, flustered and cute Hotch

A/N: This was my first Hotch x Reader fluff and I had so much fun writing these two pining over each other! Thank you to @marvelcriminalhoe for the request! I hope you enjoy it :D The request was originally just fluff prompt 11 but I decided to throw in prompt 14 too! Also can someone please teach me how to choose shorter fic titles? I just seem to be picking longer and longer lyrics every time.

Prompt(s): "No. I'm not letting you go. It's too early to get out of bed." "It's nice that the first thing I heard today was your voice."

Feedback is what motivates me to work so please let me know what you think! Reblogs are also greatly appreciated.

Taglist is open!

Masterlist

"So good news and bad news," JJ announced cutting into the conversation as she walked over to join the rest of the team in the hotel lobby. Earlier that day the team received an emergency case in Seattle and flew straight out leaving no time to book into a hotel when you arrived in the middle of the day. You were surprised JJ managed to find anywhere for the team to stay this late at night and you had half started to suspect you'd be sleeping in the police station for the night. Especially since this was one of the rarer times where Garcia had travelled with the team bringing the number of rooms needed up to eight. "The hotel has available rooms and nice ones too but they don't have enough, they only have four available to us. Since this was the last place on my list within a reasonable distance from the station it looks like we're just going to have to double up tonight if we want to get any sleep."

JJ glanced around the group looking for any protest of the idea but while the team might not have been ecstatic about the idea of sharing rooms for the duration of the case everyone seemed to have the collective agreement that they didn't care as long as they got some rest after a rough first day. JJ handed the key cards out to every second person and let everyone pair off themselves before heading towards their rooms. You stood back and watched each pair disappear until you were left standing with the only other person who hadn't pair off yet. Hotch.

The nerves that were suddenly bubbling up in your stomach were not at all because you felt uncomfortable with Hotch, no quite the opposite actually. It was certainly no secret within the BAU that you had been harbouring a massive crush on one Agent Aaron Hotchner ever since you joined the BAU. Well of course Hotch seemed to be the only person who still remained blissfully oblivious to your silent pining over him, even now he seemed unaware of the panic that was building inside of you. He gave you one of his rare smiles as he walked towards you, that damn smile that melted your heart every time you got to see it. It really was a shame that he didn't smile more often. How were you supposed to share the same room with this man for who knows how many days while you worked this case?

"Guess you're stuck with me," You joked, laughing nervously as you got ready to head up to your room. You leaned down to grab your go-bag, feeling something brush against your hand just as you reached for the handle. You looked up in time to see Hotch sweeping it off the floor and swinging it over his shoulder along with his own.

"Let me carry it for you, it's not like it's heavy." He insisted when he heard the slight noise of protest you made. You quickly gave in and let him take it, appreciating the gesture. He rested his hand on your shoulder as he moved past you towards the elevators and you froze. You stared after him, taking a minute to realise you were supposed to be following him as his touch lingered on your skin and made you blush. "I'm sure we can make this work, it's just for a couple of days right?"

"Right." You nodded as you finally caught up to him. Except for you, it wasn't going to be "just for a couple of days." You already knew you would never be able to get the memory of sharing a room with your boss that you were hopelessly in love with out of your head and it would only serve to make your crush on him a hundred times worse. Hell, you were already blushing over the slightest touch from him. "I will admit I'm a little disappointed that I'm missing out on what I'm sure is going to be one hell of a slumber party in Morgan and Garcia's room though."

Hotch let a laugh slip at that, shaking his head at you as he reached out to press the elevator call button. A smile tugged at the corner of your lip when you saw his reaction, knowing that you were the one who made him laugh. You and Hotch were close, you'd always gotten on well but you didn't always get to spend nearly as much time with him as you'd like. It was part of the reason you'd never had the courage to tell him how you felt, you were afraid that you didn't spend enough time together for him to feel the same way about you. Maybe this shortage of rooms would give you a good excuse to spend more time together.

The elevator was empty when you stepped inside as Hotch pulled out your keycard checking your floor before hitting the button and stepping back next to you. It was a quiet ride up to your floor as you both stood in comfortable silence while Hotch took the opportunity to quickly check over his emails from the day. You were more exhausted than you'd realised, the events of the day only catching up with you as you finally took a moment to catch your breath and all you wanted now was a comfortable bed to pass out in.

Once the doors finally opened on your floor you stepped out and let Hotch guide you down the hall as he followed the signs on the wall pointing you in the direction of your room number. Eventually, you came to a stop at the end of the hall and Hotch pulled out the keycard to check the number one last time.

"This is us." He said, his voice quiet as if he didn't want to disturb the silence of the hallway as he slipped the keycard into the slot on the door handle. A beep rang out as the light flashed green and he pushed the door open, moving to let you in ahead of him.

"Ever the gentleman." You teased walking into the room, switching on the lights as you went. Even just at the first glance, the room seemed great. "JJ wasn't kidding this room is nice."

It was big enough for both of you to move around without getting in each other's way and there was a large desk tucked away in the corner that would be perfect for working on the case. You were immediately grateful for the well-stocked table of teas and coffee that sat next to the door and monitoring the media coverage of the case would be at least a little easier with the large TV that hung across from the bed. You stopped in your tracks when your brain finally caught up with that last point. The bed. The singular bed in the room. You were certain JJ had forgotten to mention that slight detail when handing Hotch your keycard.

"So do you- oh," You heard Hotch's sentence trail off behind you as he finally took in the room and came to the same realisation. He dropped your bags down next to the bed and scanned around the room looking for any way to fix your situation. You could feel the nerves from earlier settling back in your stomach again, making your palms sweat at the thought of now having to share not only a room but a bed with Hotch. "I mean, it's just for a few days, right? I'm sure we can find a way to make this work unless you're too uncomfortable with it?"

"No." You blurted out a little too quickly, feeling your cheeks start to heat up as you hoped Hotch didn't think you were too eager to share a bed with him. You had no idea how he was remaining so calm and put together through all of this. "No, I'm alright with finding a way to share."

"Right well, I think I'm going to go straight to sleep. This case has me exhausted already." He admitted with a slight chuckle as he grabbed his go-bag and looked around for the bathroom. "I'll um, I'll change in the bathroom and give you some space to change or set up some work, whatever you feel like doing."

"Thank you." You nodded, giving a small smile. You considered doing some quick work before going to sleep to help you settle in and calm your nerves but honestly, you had to agree with Hotch, you were ready to go straight to sleep. "I think I'll have to join you, I could really use the sleep too."

Hotch made his way into the bathroom and locked the door behind him, leaving you standing alone in the middle of the room. You put your go-bag down on the bed and searched through it for your pyjamas. As you pulled them out you found yourself wishing you had brought something more than your old worn out tank top and shorts but then again you hadn't been expecting to share a bed with Hotch when you were packing. You changed quickly, not wanting to make things awkward if he happened to walk out at the wrong time and unpacked a few more important items before deciding to settle into bed.

You reached for the light switch and turned off the main light, leaving the room illuminated by the lamps on either side of the bed. The bed was big, a queen-sized if you had to guess which meant you'd both fit and be able to sleep comfortably without it being overly awkward. Still, you knew no matter how much space was between you, you wouldn't be able to forget about the fact that Hotch was lying only a couple of inches away from you. Just as you kicked back the covers to claim your side of the bed, the bathroom door opened again.

Hotch padded back into the room, his hand running through his now messy hair as he nervously approached the bed. You watched as he moved the covers back and crawled into the bed next to you, taking in his outfit as he did. He was wearing a slightly oversized light grey undershirt with a pair of black boxers and suddenly the butterflies in your stomach were back worse than ever. No matter how much you tried to ignore it your heart rate was rising and you could feel your heart hammering against your chest as you realised that this was the most undressed you'd ever seen Hotch. You pushed the thought to the back of your mind and did your best not to think about it instead, leaning over to switch off the lamp next to your side of the bed.

"Goodnight." You said, not quite sure what the correct way of saying goodnight was in this situation. Normally once you said your goodnights you were left alone but now, you were together for the night. It felt awkward to stay staring up at the ceiling and you certainly didn't want to make him uncomfortable by laying facing him so you shifted onto your side, facing away from Hotch and tried your best to at least get some rest.

"Night," Hotch whispered, his voice his rough and already heavy with sleep as he followed your lead and rolled over onto his side. Even with your backs facing each other you were painfully aware of how close you were. He moved closer when he rolled over and now you could practically feel the heat radiating from him. You could already hear his breathing settle as he started to fall asleep but for you, this was going to be one hell of a long night.

~~~

Hotch was the first to wake the next morning to the sight of the bright morning sun flooding in from behind the curtains. It was still early he guessed as his six a.m. alarm was yet to go off but something had woken him. At first, he blamed it on the sun and tried to ignore it, keeping his eyes closed in hopes that he would just fall back asleep but then it hit him. He was warm, too warm. He presumed it was due to the fact that it was the beginning of summer and the temperature had been rising over the past few days and the heavy duvet probably wasn't helping. He moved to throw the covers back but it was right at the moment that he realised the real cause.

At some point during the night, he had rolled onto his back and you must have moved too because now, you were curled around him preventing him from moving. Your face was buried in the crook of his neck, your breath fanning across his skin while your arms had worked their way around his waist. One hand slipped under the fabric of his shirt, resting against the bare skin of his back while your legs were tangled against his under the sheets. The heat rising in his body from your bare skin pressing against his and the flustered state that came with that.

You looked so comfortable that he didn't want to wake you, in fact, what he really wanted was to wake up like this for the rest of his life. Still, he couldn't take advantage of the fact that you had most likely accidentally curled into him in your sleep. He doubted you felt the same way about him as he felt about you and he didn't want you to feel awkward if you woke up and regretted what you'd done in your sleep. He tried to slip out of your arms as carefully as he could without waking you, deciding it wouldn't hurt to get a head start on some work. Just as he moved to stand up from the bed your arm wrapped back around his waist, tugging him back towards you.

"No." You mumbled, blinking up at him against the harsh light. "I'm not letting you go. It's too early to get out of bed."

Hotch was pretty sure you were still half asleep but he couldn't help the smile that broke out across his face at your words. He was willing to accept any invitation of morning cuddles with you and certainly wasn't going to fight you if you wanted him to spend longer in bed. He lay back down, shifting closer to you this time as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close to his chest. He felt the content sigh you let out as he closed his eyes and started to drift off to sleep again.

~~~

When you finally woke it was to the sound of your alarm blaring next to the bed and you groaned at the noise, burying your head under your pillow in hopes that if you just ignored it, it would eventually stop. You reached out blindly and swatted at your phone finally shutting the buzzing off. You rolled onto your back and noticed that the space next to you was empty, a slight pang of disappointment running through you at the realisation. You sat up, propping yourself up against the pillows and looked around the room. Your eyes landed on Hotch watching you from where he sat at the desk in the corner of the room, holding a coffee in hand and a case file in the other.

"Coffee?" He asked gesturing to what looked like a freshly brewed cup of coffee on your nightstand, steam still rising from the surface. He must have known your alarm would be going off soon.

"Oh, thank you." You smiled as you took a sip from the mug, tasting that it was exactly how you usually made your coffee. You watched Hotch while you drank your coffee. He wasn't dressed yet, still sitting in his pyjamas and you tried to remember if you had felt him getting up. It was then that you started to worry your lip between your teeth as you tried to focus on the fuzzy memory from earlier in the morning.

"What are you thinking about?" Hotch asked you as he tossed his case file down onto the desk and leaned back in his chair, looking at you curiously. Sometimes you hated being around profilers, they always knew when something was on your mind.

"Did I wake up this morning and force you to cuddle with me when you tried to get up?" You asked slowly, not sure you wanted to know as you were already dreading the answer.

"Well you didn't force me to do anything I didn't want to but if you mean did you throw your arms around me and pull me back into bed then, yes you did." Hotch chuckled, seemingly amused as he watched the deep red blush settle over your cheeks.

"Oh my God, I can't believe I did that." You let out a horrified gasp and rolled back over onto your stomach to hide your face into the pillows once again. You knew sharing a bed had been a bad idea and now you had gone and completely embarrassed yourself in front of Hotch. "That is so unprofessional, I'm so sorry."

"It's nice," Hotch admitted softly, his voice so quiet that it took you a moment to realise he was talking to you. "That the first thing I heard today was your voice."

"It could happen again if you wanted it to." Your heart skipped a beat at Hotch's words and the offer was out of your mouth before you even processed what you were thinking. You mentally slapped yourself and bit your tongue to stop you from saying anything else while you waited to see Hotch's response. You'd never expected to hear something like that from Hotch and the thought of finally having something more with him filled your chest with warmth.

"Yeah." Hotch nodded, a bright smile that he couldn't hide breaking out across his face as he dipped his head to try and hide just how much it was affecting him. "I think I would like that."

Taglist: @marauder-level-chaos

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pentechnics · 3 years ago

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Promises

Chapter 13 of Of Love and Time

Summary: As you recover, you get some discerning news from work. It forces you into an agreement that's easy to make, but near impossible to keep.

Pairing: Din Djarin x fem!reader (no y/n)

Series content: teacher/parent AU, fluff, slow burn, lots of mutual pining, sexual tension, mentions of past trauma (tagged in detail for specific chapters), depictions of violence (nothing explicit, no gore), angst, a dash of hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, Grogu is at the equivalent age of a human 4-year-old and can speak

Notes: I am SO SORRY it took this long to get this one out. This was not intended. But between having other projects and being out of town and not working on any of my WIPs for two whole weeks, it just played out like this. And it was important to me that I didn't rush it, because it's an important chapter! They all are, but since we're nearing the home stretch of this fic, it's all the more important that I'm 100% confident with a chapter before posting it. Also? Not gonna lie, this one was kinda painful to write. I'm sure you'll get why as you read lmao.

I hope you all can understand! And I hope you enjoy this one despite the happenings sljkdhglskg I promise I'll make this all worth it! Please let me know what you think!

Thank you so much for sticking by me and being so patient and wonderful. It makes me want to keep writing! And I'm going to do whatever I can to make the wait for ch14 much shorter than this one. SO, SO much love to you all! ❤️

As always, taglists is under the cut! Let me know if you’d like to be added/removed!

You did end up relapsing in the night. Din stayed with you the entire day, hardly letting you so much as scratch your head without making sure you were okay. As horrid as your body felt, you were grateful for his extended stay, even as you protested him calling in from work.

“There are plenty of other mechanics that work there. It’s an emergency, they’ll understand,” he’d said. You just sighed and rolled your eyes.

Between medicine doses and ensuring your stomach would not reject your meals, the two of you continued to talk and watch more episodes of Parks and Recreation. You noticed Din getting more and more into it, which filled you with joy. Even though you couldn’t see his expressions, you reveled in every little reactionary movement or comment he gave.

You weren’t prepared to get emotional over Leslie and Ben’s breakup. Watching Leslie be forced to love Ben secretly from afar, to pretend she didn’t love him around others, scramble to seize every little excuse to be near him, tugged at your heart. Especially as she opened up to Ron:

“We broke up because of me. But I have to tell you, Ron, if the world was ending tomorrow… I’d want to be with him.”

You sniffed and wiped away a stray tear from your face. It was way too close to home.

A warm touch on your shoulder brought you out of the data pad’s screen and back to your room. Din rubbed his thumb up and down as he gave your shoulder a squeeze. You smiled and scooched a bit closer to him. He wrapped his arm around you in response.

“Well, that’s significant. Problem is, Leslie, the world’s not ending tomorrow. The sun is gonna rise right over there. It’ll be a regular Friday, and you’ll be in the exact same position you were in before.”

You sighed. This was the first time you couldn’t wait for the school year to end. The first time you actually longed for it to end. And yet it dragged itself out in a cruel and tortuous dance of torment. And situations like the one you were currently in teased a reality that could come to fruition if only the circumstances would change sooner. Your hand clung to Din’s. He squeezed it.

How could something feel so good while also causing so much pain?

~~~~

Your symptoms began to ebb away later that day. Relief filled your system when you kept down a meal without any objections from your body.

Din stayed over that night as well, and when you awoke the next morning, he was still asleep.

You took a deep breath as you stretched. The strength had been restored to your body, head devoid of anguish. You smiled and looked over at him.

He laid against the pillow, helmet turned upward. Tiny modulated snores weaved their way to your ears. You giggled. One of his hands was resting on his stomach, which rose and fell with his breathing. The other was resting between your bodies.

With a smile, you shifted onto your side and placed your hand into his. His fingers immediately clamped around yours. You squeezed his hand and brought it closer to you, running your thumb up and down his finger.

Waking up next to Din felt more natural than it should have. Falling asleep beside him brought you so much peace that you got some of the best sleep you’ve had in years. You weren’t sure why this wasn’t scaring you the way it typically should be, but you were not complaining.

You stared at his hand. Far bigger than yours, skin so surprisingly soft given his current and prior occupations. You turned it over. Tiny scars decorated his knuckles and some other areas across the back of his hand. They were mostly smooth to the touch. You wondered where they came from; had a bounty earned a swift punch to the face? Did someone try to rob him and get obliterated for it? Or did he just stumble and bump into something while chasing Grogu?

You scooched forward and planted a small peck on his knuckle. Your cheeks grew warm as your lips lingered there, smiling against his hand.

Wow. You loved kissing his skin. It was delicate, warm, sweet like honey. You wanted more. Maybe someday, you thought to yourself.

Someday, if we get really lucky.

You backed away and looked at his head once more. It had not moved from its position. The snores had tapered off, but his breathing was still even. You closed your eyes again and nestled into your pillow, threading your fingers between Din’s.

~~~~

After making extra certain that you’d be okay and had everything you needed, Din packed up to leave that afternoon. You watched from the bottom of the stairwell as he replaced each piece of beskar, shielding the lovely skin you were now all too familiar with, and yet not familiar enough.

You’d be lying if you didn’t admit your disappointment. Having Din here with you was the most alive and relaxed you’d felt in so long, despite what your body was going through. You couldn’t help thinking about how empty your home would seem after he was gone.

You descended the rest of the stairs as he finished putting on his boots and securing his bag over his shoulder.

“Thank you for everything, Din. These past couple days…” you trailed off, staring into that black ‘T’ that had quickly become one of your favorite sights.

“... They’ve been wonderful.”

He stepped forward to meet you.

“Thank you for letting me stay. I’m just glad you’re getting better.”

You smiled.

“You’ll call me if you need anything?”

You laughed and nodded.

“Yes, don’t worry.”

“And you’re still okay with me checking in later this week?”

“Yes, though you really don’t have to, you’ve already done so much.”

“I know I don’t have to. I want to.”

He took a step closer, and slowly removed his gloves once more. He held out his bare hands to you; you placed yours into them and he wrapped his fingers around yours. You sighed as the familiar pillowy warmth encased your skin. He squeezed your hands.

“Everything I’ve done for you… I have done because I want to.”

You stared at him as the warmth of his words cascaded through your veins. He tilted his head forward, shoulders rising and falling with his breathing. Your mind was suddenly filled with the image of him walking out of your door and speeding away. It tore at something inside you; you squeezed his hands back. He ran his thumbs over your knuckles a few times before moving to hold both of your hands in one of his. With his freed hand he reached up and lifted the lip of his helmet. He brought your hands up-

Two light, gossamer kisses were placed against each set of your knuckles. Tiny pricks from his stubble grazed against your fingers. You held your breath as his soft lips lingered just a moment longer than they had to, smiling against your skin. You were certain your heart had stopped.

He lowered his helmet once more and gave your hands another squeeze before letting them go and replacing his gloves.

“Get some rest, Miss. I’ll see you soon.”

You nodded and cleared your throat.

“Give the family my regards.”

“I will.” he said with a nod.

He turned towards the door and opened it. You stood in the frame as he descended the small set of stairs.

“Oh-”

He turned back around.

“Take another look at the card the kids made for you. I think you missed something.”

You furrowed your brow and craned your head to look at it for a moment, still wedged against the wall.

“Okay.”

Your eyes didn’t leave Din’s figure as he made his way towards the curb and mounted his speeder bike. Your heart lurched when he revved it up.

“I’ll see you soon,” he called, “I promise.”

With that he began a slow descent down the street, looking back at you a few times before turning his full attention to the road. You stayed put until his speeder was out of sight.

You closed your door and slumped against it, a wave of emptiness overwhelming your senses. You looked around. The house was so silent now. So vacant.

So lonely.

You held your hands together in front of you. The spots Din had kissed carried a pleasant tingle. You brought one of them up to your own lips.

If only, you thought to yourself.

You looked up and your eyes fell onto the yellow poster paper poking out from behind your holostand. You pushed off the door and retrieved it. When you settled on the couch you took a closer look at the cover, giggling all over again at the pictures the children had drawn. You opened it up and reread every message. The one that referenced the song had your heart swelling once more. But you couldn’t find anything you hadn’t already seen.

You were about to put the card aside again when something on the back caught your eye. When you turned it over, you couldn’t believe what you were looking at.

Written in silver marker was a scribbled message that read,

‘This Mudhorn will protect you and make sure you get better. As long as you have it, you’ll be okay and we will be here for you. I love you so much Miss! Big hug! -Grogu’

Next to his words was a beautiful drawing of a Mudhorn skull — an exact replica of the signet Din wore on his armor. The one that represented his clan, his family, and the battles he fought while bringing it together.

You stared at Grogu’s message, reading it over and over again. And you stared at the Mudhorn signet. A couple tears ventured from your eyes and left tracks down your face. The moisture clung to your skin and crinkled with the movements of your muscles.

Grogu was a talented artist, yes, but there was no way he drew this all by himself. You bit your lip as more tears blurred your vision. You looked up to prevent them from spilling onto the card. Your heart heaved in your chest.

This made you miss them both all the more than you already did. It made you want to be by their sides all the more than you already did.

It made you want to give them your whole heart… all the more than you already did.

~~~~

The day dragged on into the next one, you limping from room to room, making sure to take your medicine and drink lots of fluids, as per Din’s instructions. That afternoon you reached into your fridge, where he’d kept a couple meals prepared for you. You smiled at his kindness, grateful that some aspects of your home were still marked by his presence. And when you closed the door there stood the Blurrg drawing Grogu had given you, front and center. The thought of him made you sigh; not having seen him in almost a week brought you a cloud of sadness.

While the food was warming up, your comm buzzed in your pocket. It was Gila.

You furrowed your brow; she should still be at work. She never made personal calls at work. Anxiety prickled in your fingertips while you pressed the ‘link’ button.

“Gila? Is everything okay?”

“How are you feeling, any better?”

“I’m getting there,” you started, “this is weird though, you don’t usually make personal calls during work hours.”

“And this isn’t one, sadly,” she said with a sigh. Your stomach dropped.

“What is it, what happened? Are the kids okay?”

“They’re fine, don’t worry.”

After that answer, she was silent on the other end for much longer than you could stand. You tried to steady your breathing as you waited, giving her space to speak. She finally sighed.

“First off, I’m sorry to be calling you when you’re at home at all, let alone while you’re sick. If the school year wasn’t ending and this wasn’t time sensitive, I wouldn’t have. But someone came in and filed a report against you the other day.”

Your stomach dropped again.

“A family? A parent?”

“No. A faculty member.”

Your eyes bulged from your head. Which of your coworkers would have possibly had an issue with you?

“What kind of report?”

“Inappropriate behavior.”

She went into the details: the report had accused you of having inappropriate relations on school property with a student’s parent. Your student’s parent.

“But here’s the real reason I called — they essentially said they saw you and the tin man making out in your classroom, but that would be impossible since he never takes off his helmet. Either way I would’ve called you, but this part is especially not adding up to me.”

You scoffed at the words.

“What the hell?” you said, “Gila, I swear, there’s no truth to that statement.”

“And I believe you,” she said, “but I have no say in this; I’m still going to need an official statement to take with me to the Board if you’re going to appeal this.”

“Can you tell me who submitted the report?”

“Technically, I really shouldn’t — confidentiality and all.”

You searched your brain for any possible contenders. Almost all of the teachers had been around your room throughout that night, so this had to have been someone lurking around near the end of the night, after most folks had gone home… Perhaps someone who hadn’t shown themselves to you, but that you knew for sure was present-

One face stood out in your mind. You groaned and ran a hand through your hair.

“It was Bo, wasn’t it?”

Her silence was enough to answer your question.

“That creep, why would he lie about something like this?”

“I don’t know. But I need you to tell me what really happened.”

You walked through the entire night with her. Every last detail, including when your crown fell and Din helped you replace it on your head. You could hear the faint scratching of Gila’s pen as she took note of your story.

“And I have witnesses to all of this. Not just Din, but the rest of his family was there as well.”

“A- Din? Since when were you and tin man on a first-name basis?”

“Not now, Gila — the point is, would that help?”

“Yes, it would. If they were willing to provide statements. I’ll call them up and see what I can do, okay? It’s important that you stay out of this part of the process in order to protect the integrity of your case.”

“Got it,” you said with a nod, regardless of the fact that she couldn’t see it. “Just don’t pressure them or anything. This isn’t something they have to get more involved in if they don’t want to. Is there anything else I need to do?”

“Keep resting. Get better. I’ll take this from here and let you know what happens.”

Your stomach churned. You still needed to come clean about your actual violation. You sighed. This is just as good a time as any, you reasoned.

“Gila, there’s something else we need to talk about. A separate manner from this, but not by far.”

She was silent for a moment.

“I don’t like the sound of your voice. What is it?”

You gulped down the lump in your throat. Dizziness filled your mind as anxiety coiled around your gut and squeezed.

“I need to report myself for inappropriate conduct.”

“Wait- what do you mean?”

You wanted to cry. It was possible that Gila might just fire you here, like this, over the comm. The tears were pushing against the backs of your eyes. You squeezed them shut in an attempt to keep them back.

“Something did happen between me and Din. But not at Open House, and not on school property.”

You gave her the details of what had occurred after Grogu’s birthday party. Tucking Grogu in, talking with Din, and, of course, the keldabe kiss.

“Does that even count though?” Gila asked once you finished.

“I think it does, it’s just as much of an intimate gesture as a regular kiss is in Mandalorian culture.”

Gila sighed.

“Y’all were so close…” she muttered. You didn’t fully understand what she meant, but didn’t press it.

“Okay. We’ll handle that after this first report. I’ll do what I can for you, hon, but I can’t make any promises.”

“And I don’t expect you to. Please don’t lose your job by not doing this properly. I can face it, whatever it is.”

You tried to believe that even while your entire body shook. As long as Gila buys it, you thought, you could get yourself to buy it eventually.

“Atta girl. It’ll be fine. You’ll definitely be getting big points for bringing it up on your own. But don’t worry about any of this right now, okay? I’ve got your statements, I’ll do the rest. You get better.”

You mentally groaned as your stomach flip-flopped and your head weighed itself down with vile thoughts once more.

“I’ll try.”

~~~~

“Arts and crafts time, kids.”

The substitute teacher, Mr. Duma, led the students to their desks and they all proceeded to doodle with their chosen art utensil. Grogu sat next to Li and across from Chia and Jack, the four of them sharing a bucket of various markers and colored pencils.

“I hope Miss comes back soon,” Jack said while scribbling with an orange marker.

“Me, too,” Li agreed, “Mr. Duma is nice but I want Miss to come back.”

Grogu nodded along. His heart grew heavy at the thought of you; they’d been without you for four days now, not including the weekend, and he missed you beyond belief. Mr. Duma still did the after-school goodbye routine, but it wasn’t the same without you. He only ever offered a handshake.

Grogu picked up a grey pencil and colored in the image of his dad’s helmet. You were drawn next to him, with Grogu standing between you both. All three of you were smiling — as much as Din could through the helmet — while the sky rained big blue drops around you.

“She’ll be okay,” he said quietly, “and she’ll come back.”

After arts and crafts time was done Grogu slipped away towards your desk. But he hesitated. If Mr. Duma saw this drawing first, he might take it away. Or someone else might get to it before you could see it. He headed over to his designated hook by the door and put the drawing into his backpack instead.

‘I’ll give it to her when she gets back,’ he thought to himself.

Next was recess. Mr. Duma led the students out to the play area, where they immediately ran to their activity of choice. Grogu joined Chia, Li, and Jack for a game of catch.

The four of them stood in a square formation and tossed a large ball around, giggling when someone dropped it or accidentally got knocked over. It was a welcomed distraction from the sadness of missing you.

When the school day was done, Grogu didn’t make an attempt to be the last one in line. He gave Mr. Duma a quick handshake before running off to his father, who scooped him up and carried him over to the speeder bike.

“How was school, kid?”

“Fine,” Grogu said.

“You’ve been a bit quiet this week,” Din said with a small chuckle. “Is it really that boring?”

“Kinda. It’s not as much fun without Miss.”

Din let out a small ‘huh’ and settled Grogu into the booster seat behind him.

“I miss her a lot. We all do.”

Din sighed and patted his head.

“I know. I-... I do, too.”

Grogu looked up at his dad, who looked down for a moment before looking back at him.

“But she’s going to get better and come back soon.”

“Yeah. She has the Mudhorn now, she has to get better.” Grogu said with a nod. Din chuckled.

“That’s right, pal.”

Din gave Grogu a pat before sitting in front of him and revving up the bike, carefully looking around for pedestrians before pulling out of the parking lot and driving off.

Grogu took in the familiar sensation of wind against his face. He giggled as it made his ears flutter about.

When Din stopped at a stoplight, he turned his head to the side.

“Hey, how about a little treat before we go home?”

“YES!” Grogu cried, jumping for joy in his seat. Din laughed and took a different turn.

The two of them drove up to Grogu’s favorite restaurant. After acquiring some nuggets and fries — with the essential free toy — the duo set off for home once more. Din parked the bike and helped Grogu down from his booster seat before grabbing his school bag. Grogu clung to the paper bag with his treats inside, brow scrunched in thought.

“Papa, how come I couldn’t go see her when you did?”

Din froze for a moment before sighing. He could give Grogu all the nuggets in the world, but it’d never be enough to make him forget the sadness of your absence. He knelt down to Grogu’s level.

“I wanted to take you with me. But we didn’t know what she was sick with, and we couldn’t risk you catching it.”

Grogu looked down. After a silent moment, his little brow scrunched together.

“But what about you? You didn’t get sick.”

“I have this,” Din tapped the cheek of his helmet with a finger. “Helps keep Papa from getting sick.”

“Oh,” Grogu looked down again.

“Hey- you’ll see her soon, Grogu. I know it.”

Din reached down to pat Grogu’s head, which made him look back up.

“Miss will get better and be back at school by Monday.”

Grogu stared, a sense of uncertainty clouding his gaze.

“I promise.”

Din didn’t take those words lightly anymore. Not since meeting you. He had honest faith that you’d get better, and that Grogu would be seeing you come Monday morning. It seemed to work; Grogu nodded with a little smile after a moment and lifted his arms in the air. Din picked him up and carried him into the house.

~~~~

When Saturday rolled around, you were still a bit weak. Just as you’d flushed out most of your prior sickness, new stresses settled in far too quickly and took over your thoughts ever since your talk with Gila. You were still recovering, both physically and mentally.

Today Din would be coming by to check on you. And you’d have to have a conversation that would surely bring you both pain. It was the last thing you wanted.

You counted down the hours until that afternoon, almost as if you were anticipating an execution. You tried to distract yourself and keep busy, even through your limited capacity. But most of what you could do reminded you of Din: watching sitcoms, reading the kids’ card, eating Din’s soup, sitting on the sofa with an empty space where Din would be sitting if he were there. Where he’ll probably be sitting while you have this shitty conversation.

One solid thing you were able to get done was a little note for Grogu. Seeing his beautiful message in the card touched your heart, and you wanted to thank him. You’d written a pinky promise to see him soon, and that until then you’d be thinking of him and using the Mudhorn he gave you to get better as fast as possible.

A few hours later, a knock sounded at your door. You sighed and made your way to it. Aside from the other things that would come with this visit, you had a feeling he also wasn’t going to be happy to see your slow recovery. You took a deep breath before opening the door and taking in the familiar sight of his broad figure filling up the entire door frame.

“Hey,” you breathed as you invited him inside.

“How are you feeling?” he asked, already tapping his helmet. “You look a little better, but still don’t seem okay.”

His tone was so sad. Guilt crept to your heart, as if you’d let him down by not being better yet.

“Yeah, some new things happened for me to stress about.”

He nodded.

“Gila called us.”

“Good,” you said with a nod. You were grateful to be seeing him after he found out about the report, rather than being the one to tell him. Gila had told you to stay out of it, after all.

“We all backed you up. That report was ridiculous.”

“Thank you,” you said while letting out a breath of relief. “You didn’t have to do that, I’m sorry everyone had to be so involved.”

“Don’t be,” he gave a dismissive wave, “you didn’t do anything wrong. And we wanted to support you.”

You smiled.

“She also mentioned what happened at Grogu’s party. I wish there was more I could’ve done for you there.”

“Oh please, don’t worry about that,” you waved a dismissive hand.

After a moment you invited him to take a seat on the couch.

“I think we should have that talk now,” you said while settling down beside him. “Is that okay?”

“Yes, I think it’s a good idea. I don’t want you having any more stress like this.”

You stared at him for a moment, taking in his image. Warm, comforting, familiar. A complete 180 from just a few months ago, when he was a stoic, stern stranger. Your gaze moved down to the gloved hands in his lap. You took a deep breath.

“There’s still about a month left in the school year-” you gulped. The words felt like poison dripping from your lips, sucking out your life force with each one you had to say.

“-and I think it’d be best if we-”

You sighed and squeezed your eyes shut. You couldn’t bear to complete the sentence.

“... didn’t see each other.”

Your eyes snapped up to Din’s visor. You tilted your head at him, to which he shrugged.

“I had a feeling that’s what we’d have to do.”

Your chest deflated with a huff.

“I don’t want to do it,” you said, “but I think it’s the only way to make this work. We can’t risk jeopardizing either of the reports Gila’s working on, and we can’t be giving anyone any more reason to file more.”

“You’re right.”

You stared at him in silence. This should’ve made it easier. But him already understanding and agreeing that this was best only made it more painful. Your mind wandered to what the next few weeks might look like: only getting to wave at him from afar after a school day. Not being able to share a random conversation or go for a spontaneous jetpack flight. Not being able to hold his hand and watch Parks and Rec.

Just as you’d gotten yourself to open up your heart to him, you had to shut it again. Your chest grew heavy.

“Miss,” Din scooched closer to you and placed a hand on your knee. “I don’t want to be apart from you, either. But it won’t be forever.”

You stared at that black ‘T’ that you’d grown to adore, longing more than ever to see the eyes hiding behind it. He was right. In the grand scheme of things, it was only for a little bit. But with the way time was moving lately, you had a sense that it would seem like the opposite.

“Besides, when it’s done, we won’t need to worry at all anymore.”

His other hand pushed your hair behind your ear. You sucked in a breath through your nose as you took in his touch while you could. It lingered there, as if he were also absorbing you while he had the chance.

Your heart skipped a beat. Not having to worry anymore sounded like an unreachable fever dream. Not having to look over your shoulder to see who could be watching, not having to watch yourself, or keep yourself from expressing all the wonderful ways Din made you feel. Being able to spend more time with him and his beautiful boy, and their wonderful family. Your mind briefly wandered to the shenanigans you all shared at Open House, and again at Grogu’s party.

That could be your every day. That happiness could become a regular part of your routine. The pillars that built up your life could merge with his. You took a deep breath.

If you could make it through this next month… there’d be nothing in your way anymore.

“So,” you said as you cleared your throat, “in that case, I think it’s best if you schedule your transition appointment during a school day sometime soon. Kos, one of our admins, is covering for me until I get back and is also taking on appointments while we teach the kids. They’ll take good care of you and tell you everything you need to know about Grogu’s next teacher, and what to expect for the next school year.”

Din stared in silence for a moment before he nodded.

“Okay.”

A little whisper of a word. His thumb grazed your jawline in a delicate motion, as if you’d fall apart under any extra pressure. And maybe you would have; a sudden pain began plunging through your heart.

“I trust you. I’ll do that.”

It was only a few weeks, but were you strong enough for this? Were you strong enough to look at this man without reaching for him? Without being able to feel his touch, or give him yours? Without being able to embrace the sensation of your heart erupting with glee at the very notion of him?

Without telling him all the things you so desperately needed him to know?

Holding back was never something you thought you’d have trouble doing. You never had in the past, after all. Yet here you were. Aching for release, and your sentence hadn’t even begun.

“It’ll be hard,” you breathed, “it’ll be so hard, Din.”

“I know.” he paused and squeezed your knee. “But it’ll be okay. I promise you.”

You sighed, putting your hand over his and giving it a squeeze. You nodded.

“You’re right.”

It was already impossible. Impossible to sit there and stare, with Din just a few breaths away, and not lean into him. Not press your forehead to his. Not collapse into his arms. Your heart refused to settle down, no matter how deeply you breathed. To try and ease the restless needs, you scooched closer to him, pulling his hand higher up to cover your thigh with its warmth. His other hand moved up and down your back in a soothing motion.

You wanted to return the gesture. This couldn’t be easy for him, either. You looked him up and down to decide which armorless area would be best to focus on without fully throwing away the promise you two had just made.

You settled for his shoulder blade, placing your free hand on the space above his pauldron and squeezing, running your thumb up and down the fabric of his flight suit. His movements stilled for a moment. You looked into his visor with a small smile.

“I know it’s only for a bit, but…” you bit your lip, a sudden sense of hesitation almost halting the rest of your words. Did you have the right to say them? The two of you hadn’t technically established anything between you. Nothing tangible strung you together.

And yet there was no doubt in your mind that you were fully tethered to him. No matter what you might try to tell yourself. You took another breath and squeezed his shoulder again.

“... I’ll miss you.”

Din squeezed your leg. Hard. For just a second before easing off once more. His chest rose and fell with deeper breaths.

“I-”

He sighed. The hand on your back slipped around your waist and pulled you a bit closer, visor unmoving from your eyes.

“... I’ll miss you, too.”

You wanted to cry when his voice cracked.

The two of you sat there together for a few more drawn out moments, hands and eyes absorbing as much as they possibly could to tide you over during the upcoming month of drought.

With a final squeeze of your side, Din retracted his hand with a breathy ‘okay.’

“I suppose I should go, then.”

You bit your lip hard to stomp down your heart’s protest while nodding your head. If he stayed any longer, there’d be no controlling yourself.

He patted your thigh one last time before rising from the couch. You joined him and walked towards the door a few paces behind him, until he suddenly turned back around.

“Promise me, though.” he motioned his hand towards you, helmet tilted at a dangerous angle. “Promise me. That if you need me for anything during this time, you'll call.”

You stared at him, gulping down the sudden lump in your throat.

“I don’t care about the reports, I don’t care about any of that stuff. If you need me, nothing else matters. I want to be there for you.”

His words hit you like a punch to the gut. You’d never heard such a stern tone from him before. It was almost frightening. It was such a drastic shift from the gentle, soft man who was just holding you on the couch. He sounded frantic.

“If you get sick like this again, or something else happens, I can’t bear to-” he cut himself off and looked away from you with a deep sigh, gloved hands dropping down with a huff. He didn’t continue right away; instead he stared off, fingers flexing in and out of fists. You stayed still and waited for him to continue.

“Please. Just promise me you’ll call.”

Would you actually be able to keep such a promise? For the first time in years, you weren’t sure you could. Under any other circumstances, you’d have no problem giving him that assurance. But these weren’t normal times.

What would you do if you did find yourself in such a situation? Risk losing your job again, before even knowing if you’d still have one by the time the year ended? Risk Din and Grogu’s wellbeing by possibly pulling more unwanted attention towards them? Putting more burdens than you already had thus far onto those you cared for? Your breaths came shorter as your mind swam with horrid possibilities.

You were frozen, your throat suddenly bone-dry. What were you supposed to say to that? Your eyes darted around his figure as you tried to piece your thoughts together.

“Wait- no.”

You looked back up at Din, who was waving his hands in front of himself.

“I’m sorry. I know what that word means to you. You’d be loyal to it. And forcing you to give me that would be… extremely selfish. You have more to lose from keeping that promise than I do.”

He took a deep breath.

“I’m so sorry.”

Just as mysteriously as the tension arrived, it dissolved. You cracked a small smile. When was the last time someone had put this much consideration into their words for you?

“You know, if that’s your definition of selfish, then we’ve both been guilty of that.”

Din turned to you, head tilted in a silent question. You let out a little laugh.

“I feel like every interaction I’ve had with you has been selfish. Wanting things I shouldn’t be wanting, but going after them anyway.”

You took a step closer.

“Isn’t that why we’re here? Because we both decided to be a little selfish?”

Din huffed.

“I suppose so.”

Your smile grew. “Thank you. For caring so much. It really does mean a lot.”

His turn to step closer to you. The gentle weight of his hand landed on your shoulder.

“You’ll be okay.”

It sounded like he was convincing himself more than addressing you; you nodded with confidence.

“I will be. And every time you see me at school when you come to get Grogu, you’ll have less reason to worry.”

He nodded again. After an extended moment of breathing in his space, taking in that now comforting scent of cologne while you could, he stepped away and the two of you made your way to the door once more.

“Wait!” you called, a light bulb going off in your head. You turned to your side table and retrieved the small folded paper you’d prepared.

“That reminded me, can you give this to Grogu?” you held the paper out to Din. “I just… wanted him to know I’m thinking about him.”

Din nodded and placed the paper in his pocket.

“He’ll love hearing that. He… misses you a lot.”

“I miss him too,” you said with a smile. The image of his grinning face entered your mind, just before the image of Din speeding off replaced it.

“Be safe getting home.”

“I will be.”

His hand hesitated on top of the knob. He turned to you again, visor peering into your face. The fingers on his free hand flexed about.

“Take care, Miss.”

The somber tone of his voice shattered something inside you. You squeezed every muscle in your body to keep the tears at bay. Din turned the knob and made his way out the door. You stood at the frame and watched, regretting not reaching out to him or giving his hand an extra squeeze when you had the chance.

He sat still on his speeder bike for a second before looking your way. You couldn’t even attempt a smile, instead biting your lip to keep from crumbling right there. You wrapped your arms around yourself and squeezed.

His sight didn’t leave you as he revved up the bike, movements slow and reluctant. In contrast, he gave you a nod that was certain, solid, confident. As if he were telling you that you’d both make it through this. That got you to smile a bit while you returned the gesture.

Watching him drive away wretched at your heartstrings. Once he was out of sight you shut the door and sighed.

So it begins.

~~~~

Every muscle in Din’s body protested as he got further and further from your house. There were so many things he wanted to tell you, so much he wanted to do for you, but it wasn’t the right time. As much as he tried reasoning with himself, his heart lurched with the weight of words unspoken.

Something inside him had come unhinged when you admitted you’d miss him. It was the closest he’d gotten to hearing you evoke any potential feelings for him, and he wasn’t prepared for it. He wasn’t sure if it was better to know or not at this point. But either way, it was clear that those words would echo in his mind throughout the upcoming month without you, when he’d be missing you just as much.

At that moment the last thing he wanted to do was leave you. He was a protector, first and foremost. And as his mind raced with what could become of you or your health in the time between now and the last day of school, without being able to help you, he panicked.

He kicked himself for what that panic caused him to ask of you. Your promises, unlike those of most people, were true. He’s seen it firsthand, how far you go to keep your word. How much you do to make sure everyone involved is taken care of, even at your own expense. It would’ve been cruel of him to put you in that position for his sake. You had a career on the line — happiness, fulfillment, all the beautiful things he saw in you whenever the two of you would speak in your classroom, or when he saw you interact with your students.

Who was he to put you at risk of losing that? Again? There was no excuse for it.

The sight of the community garden pulled him from those thoughts, instead plunging him back to that night under the moons with you. Without thinking he pulled over and hopped off the bike.

Din walked around the empty garden, retracing the path you’d led him down back then. New fruits and vegetables were growing from their designated spaces, and the orange berry bush was blossoming tiny white flowers in preparation for a new batch.

He looked up at the sky. It was a clear day, a few clouds scattered among the sunshine. Images of flying through the night with you resurfaced, the memory of your giggles and squeals bringing a smile to his face. His mind continued to wander.

It was all so unexpected, the way you fit so perfectly into his heart. So many moments came together in his mind: playful banter during a check-in, adventures during the zoo trip, watching you beat a man unconscious in a diner, seeing you make Grogu smile in a way he’d never seen before, getting lost in your glowing eyes while you talked about something you loved, and so many more. With each one his heart soared to heights previously unheard of.

There was no denying how much you’d grown to mean to him.

He made his way down to the florals; some of them were wilting away while others were budding anew. He stopped to look at the mystery plant from afar, imagining you standing in front of it, gently nudging a bud with your fingers. Your face was clear as day in his mind; you were so content, so calmly curious. He couldn’t get enough of that expression.

Now that plant was blooming, violet flowers were sprouting near the top while shimmering pink ones began to bloom underneath them. The colors changed in hue as the eye moved down the bush, creating a gorgeous gradient. The whole plant stood taller than you, and just a bit shorter than him.

He stepped up to it and pressed a button on his helmet. No results from the scanner. He turned it off along with the thermal map, getting as close as possible to seeing the plant’s natural image through his helmet. Had you seen this yet, he wondered. They’re so beautiful.

And even though he still didn’t know what this plant really was, it reminded him of you. Late to begin blooming, but eventually sprouting the most beautiful flowers in the garden. Persistent in its efforts, mysterious in its transformation. Colorful and varied. Soft to the touch, with a strong, unwavering foundation.

A sight he never wanted to stop looking at.

He sighed and headed back to his speeder bike.

He couldn’t go home yet. Not like this.

****

OLAT taglist: @dincrypt @anrimdjarin @kodye1018 @persie33 @janebby @allmahfeels @onomatopoetic-aesthetic @queen-since-97 @tobealostwanderer @darlingotaku @fangirlalexia @justdrawings101 @onebrownoneblue @440mxs-wife @what-iwish-you-knew @girlofchaos

perm taglist: @booksarekindaneat @bluemacaron @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @whataenginerd @christina-loves @librariantothejedi @literallydontlook @the-little-ewok

#the mandalorian #din djarin #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin x reader #mando fic #mando x reader #grogu #fluff #of love and time #my writing

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dolliedarlin · 4 years ago

Text

KIRIPIMA | THREE ⏤Eijiro K.

BAKUSQUAD ENDEARMENT SERIES PART 1 : EIJIRO KIRISHIMA

SUM. : kirishima wants to know why you make him feel the way you do and what better way to find out than to take you and Ren on a little outing.

PAIR. : pro hero eijiro kirishima x single mum reader

LENGTH : 2.1k

G. : fluff ; ren discovers cotton candy ; red riot fans are super cute ; kirishima realises his feelings and what he wants ; you should say yes

A/N : i really can’t stop writing for this series, what is wrong with me? but at least this gives many of you a fun read to uwu over whilst also giving me the dopamine rush i need to stay sane during these stressful times. anywho~ i hope you all enjoy the read (also i can’t believe i’m turning 19 tomorrow)

edit : i'd like to give extra credit and thanks to @SeabornBeauty on quotev for giving me the prompts and ideas for part 3 and future parts 4 and 5! thank you so much, lovely! they were perfect prompts for future additional parts!

TAGLIST : @girlontumblur ; @pegdenki ; @kirislut ; @bunny-on-crack ; @pandainfinitely

After the day at the ice cream parlor, Kirishima was determined to spend more time with you outside of strolls in the park. Of course, Ren would be present as well because the two of you always come together like a packaged deal, which isn't a problem for him as Ren is just too sweet for his own good.

The pro-hero had grown a fondness for both of you. Every day, he ends up thinking about you, at least, once; holding your hand as he carries Ren in his spare arm, who he knows would immediately start fiddling with his spiked hair. The adorable little coos and awes Ren would let out even though the little boy has played with his hair many times by now would never fail to make Kirishima's heart thump with affection. If any harm came to your son, Kirishima would go ballistic. He could say the same for you. The simple sound of your voice sets his mind at ease and your radiant smile gives his heart wings. If anything were to happen to you, nothing would get in the way of his fight to take you away from danger.

The way you make him feel wasn't something Kirishima was familiar with and was more than eager to figure out as soon as possible. Hence why he was keen on spending more time with you. This led to him begging Bakugou into swapping patrols for one night so that he could take you and Ren out to a western fair that was traveling across Japan.

At first, Kirishima didn't think you would actually agree to it, however, that could have been his mental cushion for if you ever rejected his offer. On the other hand, he was very pleasantly surprised to hear you agree on an outing with him outside of the park strolls.

"A western fair?" you hum thoughtfully as Ren perks up in your arms, which you immediately take notice of. Turning your gaze to your little boy, you lean close until your noses were almost touching, "What do you think, little lotus?"

"Fun fun!" Ren cheered before looking at Kirishima and making grabby hands at him, whereby the two of you instinctively took a step closer to one another, allowing Ren to cuddle into the pro-hero's chest. In the beginning, you were always very timid about being so close to the hero, however, after spending so much time together, where Ren constantly forces the two of you to stay within such close proximity, the intimately close distance now elicits a comforting feeling for you. And judging from the relaxed smile on Kirishima's handsome face, you can confidently say that the sentiment is mutual.

"So, is that a yes, I'm hearing?" Kirishima grinned brightly as Ren nodded.

"Yes!" the two boys then turned towards you with expecting eyes.

"I guess, we're going, then!"

The experience of attending a western fair was completely new to Kirishima but he was happy to be sharing the unfamiliar event with you and Ren. A lot of games were played and most were lost but the few that Kirishima managed to win, resulted in a happily cheering Ren as you clapped in congratulations. Upon handing Ren the toy he had succeeded in winning, the red-head was met with a tight hug around the neck from the little boy as you smiled widely from beside them.

Kirishima hadn't really had the pleasure of feeling the satisfying triumph of being the number one hero, however, from Ren thanking him through the tightest embrace he could manage with his little arms as you smile fondly from behind your son's tiny frame, Kirishima can confidently say that he can finally relate to the feeling of being a winner - of being number one. He is standing on the tallest mountain with his back straight and screaming in happiness up to the heavens. Nothing could beat this feeling.

He could very well get addicted to this light and whole emotion. If only he can put a name to the sentiment, he would know how to properly pursue it.

"What dat?" Ren asked, pointing towards a cotton candy stand, "Pink fluffy cloud?" he tilted his head adorably as Kirishima once again became a victim of irresistible cuteness - it's deadly.

"That's cotton candy, baby," you explain, ignorant to the pink hue flourishing on Kirishima's cheeks. It felt as if you were calling him by that fond term of endearment with how close you were despite your gaze being directed explicitly at your son, who was in his arms.

"Candy?"

"Do you want some, Ren? I can buy a small one for you, if you'd like," Kirishima offered after sending you a look asking for permission. In response, you had lifted your hand to gesture that a small one would be alright, you wouldn't want Ren having a sugar rush, especially this late in the evening. He would have one undoubtedly since cotton candy was essentially sugar, however, you still want him to experience tasting cotton candy as he's never had it before. A small amount would be alright to have.

"Okay!"

After tucking Ren into your arms, Kirishima went off to buy a small stick of cotton candy as you and Ren found an empty bench to sit on and gather the small collection of prizes Kirishima had won for him. "Kiripima best!" Ren cheered as he bounced in your lap, cuddling all the small toys to his chest with the happiest smile on his face.

"Yes, he is, do you remember what to say, baby?"

"Thank you!" Ren chirped to demonstrate his manners.

"That's my good boy," your soft praise is followed by a kiss to his button nose. Soon enough, Kirishima came back with a stick of cotton candy for Ren as he hands you a corndog. He has one for himself as well.

"I felt bad not getting you anything so I hope this corndog makes up for that,"

He chuckles bashfully as you smile and happily accept the offering, "That's so thoughtful of you, thank you Eijiro," he has to keep himself from physically shivering at the way you say his name. It sounds so much better being said by you and your beautiful voice.

"Nah, it's no problem at all," thankfully, he manages to act normal around you, "here you go Ren," handing over the fluffy cotton candy that Ren had been eyeing the instant his hero came back, Kirishima gently bit his lip in an attempt to keep himself from laughing aloud.

"Thank you, Kiripima!" Ren leaned over and quickly gave him a kiss on the nose before stuffing his cheeks with the cotton candy, his eyes sparkling with joy the instant that the sugar cotton melted on this tongue. To eat your corndog as Ren devours his cotton candy, you and Kirishima sit side by side on the bench as Ren happily munches away on his sweet treat atop Kirishima's lap. Idle, happy conversation happens here and there as Kirishima drapes one arm along the back of the bench while you lean back and rest your head against his shoulder.

As you were munching away on another bite of your corndog, which you loved the texture and taste of, rapid footsteps suddenly rang in your ears until a new person made their way to stand before you. Looking up, in front of you, stood a fairly young teenage boy whose eyes were sparkling with excitement whilst bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"You're the Sturdy Hero, Red Riot, right?!"

"Uh, yeah," Kirishima confirmed before being hit with enthusiastic rambling. It was clear from the young lad's unstoppable speech, that he really admired Kirishima. Looking towards the casually dressed pro-hero to your right, you witness the look of fondness and humble pride in his gentle expression, which instantly warmed your heart. The entire time, the Red Riot fan was rambling to Kirishima about how much he looked up to him, Ren's full attention was on him too, his concentrated stare on the fan revealed understanding of what he was saying and had Ren nodding along as if to say 'I agree'. Truly, when two fanboys meet, their connection and love for their idol transcend age as well as level of comprehension. Ren normally wouldn't be able to keep up with such frantically put-together, long-winded speeches but his body language expresses his understanding.

This made you giggle. Your fanboy of a son will be the death of you from his cuteness.

"I really really admire you. I want to be as brave and strong of a hero as you one day!"

"Good luck on that journey, my man," Kirishima grins toothily as he pats the boy on the shoulder, he would have stood up if it were like all other interactions with his fans but Ren was in his lap and he didn't want to tussle him around. And, frankly, Kirishima liked having Ren seated in his lap, his grown attachment to him being nothing to laugh at, "I look forward to seeing you on the hero charts one day," he does this without asking the boy what his quirk is and just goes to show how he's grown into accepting that you don't need a flashy quirk to be a good hero. You want to say how proud you are of him but don't want to interrupt his interaction with his fan, who, If it's possible, grew additional admiration in his eyes as he thanks Kirishima profusely.

"Thank you so much Red Riot! I have to go now but I just wanted to say that you and your family look really happy and it's very cute!" at his final statement, the little boy runs off back to his friends as you and Kirishima are left dumbfounded with your mouths gaping open in shock. For several drawn out moments, the two of you stay like that until you finally process the situation in your heads and your cheeks begin to burn hotter than molten lava. It doesn't help that Ren starts clapping his hands happily as he smiles up at the two of you, pink remnants of cotton candy sugar littering the corners of his smiling mouth.

Despite being so incredibly embarrassed, you instinctively tuck your face into Kirishima's shoulder with a timid whimper to which he follows up with a laugh. What a wonderful thought. To be a part of your family, that sounds like the perfect life to Kirishima. He would do anything to see you every day, wake up to your sleeping face before he goes to gently awaken Ren. If he wants to, he can cook you breakfast but if you decide to cook instead, he won't complain. He'll only complain about how lucky he is to have you in his life and how beautiful you look in the act of taking care of him through your cooking. Maybe he'll wrap his arms around your waist from behind like in those cliche movies, it's cheesy but he knows it'll feel like bliss to embrace you so casually and lovingly. He'll go to work as you and Ren wave him goodbye from the doorway and when he comes back after an exhausting day, you and Ren will both be there to welcome him home with hugs and kisses, instantly reviving his tired frame. A simple life, a quiet life.

That sounds like paradise.

A second passes and you begin to feel his big, calloused hand lovingly stroking the back of your head, slightly pushing your face further into his shoulder. With some maneuvering, he has your face pressed into the juncture of his neck and shoulder, still petting down the back of your head as Ren crawls into your lap and cuddles into your stomach comfortingly. In no time at all, you were being cuddled by your two favorite boys.

"So this is what this feeling is," Kirishima whispers into your hair, which makes you look up at him curiously.

"What do you mean?"

By now, you were both staring deeply into each other's eyes, "This feeling whenever I'm around you," Kirishima clutches at the area above his heart, wrinkling his shirt in the process, "it's a want- no, it's a need to be with you and Ren," he leans down until your noses touch and the world disappears around you, "not as a friend but as someone more than that..." taking a strand of your hair he brings it to his lips and kisses it as his nose inhales your intoxicating scent, "I want to protect you and care for you and love you and see you every day, both of you. That is my wish," he looks you in the eyes again, "will you grant it for me?"

PREV. | NEXT.

BNHA MLIST | ENDEARMENT SERIES

#kirishima x reader #kirishima fluff #kirishima x single mum reader #kirishima headcanon #bnha x reader #bnha kirishima #bnha fluff #kiripima!

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ye4gerismarchives · 3 years ago

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the bachelorette: the wedding

an: h-hey guys😅 a whole month w/o rhe bachelorette. y’all prolly forgot about it. fortunately, i haven’t😭 sorry yall, i’ve been up all night for the past month reading about nasty white men instead of writing for the bachelorette. this chapter has 4768 words, so i guess that’s a plus.

tags: black, fem reader. i don’t have any triggers off my head, if something does trigger you, do let me know

taglist: @taybird

5:00 am

You had plans to send Levi to his grave. How dare he wake you up at like four in the morning only to start your makeup and hair an hour later? The makeup and hair team were completely respectful towards you and respected your space, considering today was going to be full of emotions.

As your face was getting beat, there was a knock at the door. The makeup artist working on your face stopped so that you could address the person at the door. "If your name is Levi, don't bother coming in," you say. The door opens and your heart jumps because

Her Royal Highness Princess Historia and her girlfriend, Ymir, were in YOUR room.

"Oh sh*t, Your Royal Highness," you let out. Members of your team start to curtsy and bow to Historia. Ymir stands awkwardly behind her. She must have been getting used to the royal bs around her.

You stand to curtsy as well but Historia raises a hand to stop you. "Today is all about you. Ymir and I are going to be your bridesmaids today! Levi called us and we decided we would support you today!" she says cheerfully.

So, Levi probably wasn't going to die today. Now, you couldn't bring yourself to be mad at him but you still side eyes him. He was a powerful guy- you were still under the impression that he said something to Mikasa during the show and caused her unusual behavior.

"O-Oh?"

"Yeah! Ymir and I will get changed but we'll see you in your dress."

And with that, the princess and her girl left your room. It was like a dream.

5:30 am

Weeks before the wedding came, you went dress shopping. However, it didn't go how you wanted it to go. Ideally, you would be dress shopping with Sasha, Mikasa, and Connie. There was no way in hell you would call Sasha and ask her to go with you. You called Connie, who refused to pick up. You thought about calling Mikasa but you felt uneasy about it. So, Levi and his husband, Erwin, went with you.

Erwin was a complete angel. He asked you respectful questions about your life and even made you laugh. Spending time with Erwin made you realized how...dark Levi was and even made you question why they were even together. But your thoughts couldn't stop you from seeing how Levi melted under Erwin's touch. They loved each other. You hoped that You and Jean would be like that.

With their help, you managed to pick the perfect dress.

Slipping it on for the second time was just as magical as it was the first. Your team awed and cooed over how beautiful you looked. Historia and Ymir entered in matching pink outfits and immediately started fawning over how good you looked.

You felt your face redden up and you couldn't help but smile. But all of that went away when a familiar face entered.

"You...you look good, y/n."

"Mikasa...what are you doing here?"

Mikasa was standing in front of you in the same pink color that Ymir and Historia were in but her outfit was a sleeveless wide-legged jumpsuit. Her bangs were brushed away from her face and the rest of her hair sat behind her ears- well, mostly.

"Levi called me. He apologized for everything and told me to come over to apologize to you too. And then he forced me to be your maid of honor," Mikasa explained.

Levi forcing her to come over sounded like him but apologizing? He must have realized he went too far, especially since Mikasa was his niece. Levi was too caught up in creating and entertaining drama that he probably forgot Mikasa's relation to him.

So, you decided to let everything go.

You walk towards Mikasa with arms open and she's shocked but she doesn't hesitate to envelop you in her arms are well.

"I'm so sorry, y/n. I know was so out of line. I'll never let any man get in the way of our friendship again," Mikasa said as she squeezed you harder.

"Same here. If things don't work out with Jean, I'll marry you instead," you joke. You can feel Mikasa's laughter vibrate against your neck. She pulls away first and you proceed to ask another question. "Have you been in touch with Sasha?"

Mikasa purses her lips and shakes her head. "She's been radio silent. I can't tell if she got more backlash than me. She's off social media and just unwilling to speak with anyone. The hate probably got to her and she's just hiding for now."

You weren't too surprised. Mikasa was doing a job- a terrible one- but Sasha went out of her way to sleep with one of your guys...but she was drunk. You could imagine Sasha being the most discussed and debated online. Without speaking to her, you wouldn't know what was really going on in her mind.

"Oh! You never said hi to Princess Historia or Ymir. They're my bridesmaids for the day," you point out. The color leaves Mikasa's face when she realizes who's in the room with her. "Sh*t. Your Royal Highness," Mikasa curtsies. Historia lets out one of her signature giggles and begins to introduce herself and Ymir to Mikasa. As that goes on, your team starts helping you with your dress again.

You were slightly glad Mikasa was by your side today. The situation between the both of you was awkward but you were willing to give her another chance.

7:30 am

In the last two hours, you've done photoshoots and chat with everyone around you. Now it was time for Jean to be yours and for you to be his. You did question the early wedding time that Levi gave you but this would probably be the last time you saw that man so let's just let him do what he wants.

You were visibly nervous. You were gripping onto Mikasa's hand like it would be your last time doing so. "Hey, just remember, he's not your real husband. At least for now. This is all show," Mikasa reminds you. She was right. Jean may have been romantic with you but also he got his hour of fame, he could possibly leave you. Maybe he would get married to Connie.

You started to take a few deep breaths as you pulled up in front of the venue. Levi had rented a beach (not the one you and Connie were on) for your wedding.

From what you could see in the car, there were multiple seats and people were filling them up. You hoped that Connie's family had no ill-feeling toward you and decided to show up. It would be a shame since you were caught on television talking about how you would love for them to be there.

Your car came to a slow end. "y/n, do not worry. Remember, THIS is all fake. Only you decide if it's real," Mikasa reminds you. Levi opens your door and offers his hand to you. "It's go time." Mikasa helped you with your veil making sure that it wouldn't hit the ground.

"y/n, I know I may have been a menace but I'm happy for you. You might have had the most popular season yet," he says. Him bringing up ratings was no shock to you. You don't reply and Levi have his moment.

You like to think that Jean would like to spend the rest of his life with you. You knew that wasn't the case with many Bachelorettes and Bachelors but you look at Levi and Erwin...ah well, that wasn't a good example, considering that Erwin wasn't a contestant. He was the previous host. 'CALM DOWN,' you tell yourself, 'YOU AND JEAN WILL BE GOOD. AND IF HE DOESN'T LIKE YOU, ITS WHATEVER BECAUSE I'M THE BEST THING EVER.'

Minutes later, you're at the end of the aisle. Jean has his back turned and he's pacing back and forth slightly. Next to him is Connie. You know this because you recognize his big egg head. You're happy he put everything aside to support the both of you.

Mikasa takes her place in front of you and the music starts. Levi offers you his arm and you take it.

This was really happening.

You looked into the audience with a smile on your face but everything was moving so fast, you couldn't recognize their faces.

Before you knew it, you were by Jean. He still couldn't look at you- not until Levi gave you away. The marriage officiant clears his throat and begins to talk.

"We are gathered here today to witness the union of Jean and y/n. Welcome friends and family! We're glad to have you with us.

Today is the beginning of a remarkable journey for this couple. Drawing on their mutual admiration, respect, and trust, they are ready to embark on the next chapter in their lives. We celebrate the love and light evident in their relationship and wish them well on this joyous occasion.

Who gives this woman away?"

"I do," Levi answers. He takes Jean's hand and places it on top of yours. Jean then moves his under yours so that he could hold it. He looks down at Levi and mouths 'Thank you'. The shorter male nods and takes a seat.

The officiant gives you and Jean a moment to face each other. Jean had the biggest smile on his face when his eyes landed on you. "You look gorgeous," he whispers. "You're not so bad yourself," you reply.

The officiant continues. "If anyone has cause to object to the forming of this union, speak now or forever hold your peace." You look over Jean's shoulder to see Connie. You couldn't see his whole face, thanks to Jean's height, but you could see his eyes. They were narrowed and looking straight at you.

You wanted to feel bad, but you couldn't. YOU decided that Connie would not be your spouse, and that was final.

No one responded to the officiant's request, so he continued.

"Marriage is an integral part of the human tradition. Let us remember, as we stand here before the Universe, that the vows taken today hold great importance, just as they did to our ancestors. As individuals, we choose to enter the union of marriage to share all aspects of ourselves with our soulmate. Today, this is true for Jean and y/n."

Soulmate. You hoped that was true for you and Jean. You did meet him on a tv show.

"There are few greater joys in life than finding someone with whom we truly "click." In that spirit, I will now share a short reading on soulmates from author Richard Bach:

"A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we're pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we're safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we've found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life."

Under the eyes of Ymir, together we take a moment to acknowledge the seriousness of the commitment being entered into today. With great joy, we also recognize the special bond shared by Jean and y/n.."

This...this was a special bond indeed. Not only that, it was completely random. The next part of the wedding was your vows. The next part of solidifying your relationship.

"I will now invite the couple to share their vows. Jean and y/n, the promises you make today are sacred; they are the groundwork from which your marriage will grow and blossom over time.

Jean, would you like to begin first?"

Jean nods and squeezes your hands. "y/n, hopefully by the end of this ceremony, you will be my wife. I know there's a lot that you're worried about but I'll do everything to make you happy. I'll always protect you and keep you satisfied."

"y/n, your turn."

"Jean. I'm not too sure what to say...you've out-speeched me," you joke. Jean chuckled. "But...I too promise to love and protect you. I'll also make sure we're on the same page because that's very important for our relationship. I'm willing to fight for us."

You look at the officiant, letting him know that you were done.

"Let us proceed. Jean, before your family and friends, do you take y/n as your beloved Wife, to have and to hold, through laughter and in sadness, through challenges and successes, so long as you both shall live?"

Jean is silent for a moment. He's rubbing the back of your right hand and staring straight into your eyes- almost as if he was reevaluating everything. This made you nervous. Jean was a smart guy. You know you couldn't hold him down and force him to do anything he didn't want.

"I...I do," he finally answers. The weight on your chest dissolves.

"y/n, before your family and friends, do you take Jean as your beloved Husband, to have and to hold, through laughter and in sadness, through challenges and successes, so long as you both shall live?"

"Yes, I do," you answer quickly. You hear small laughs coming from the audience.

The officiant gives you a small smile before continuing. "Wedding rings are a traditional symbol of the strength of the bond between two soulmates." Connie comes from behind Jean with the wedding bands and gave you both one.

"This bond is never broken, and continues in a perpetual circle, glowing with the warmth and eternal light of two souls in a perfect union. By wearing these rings, you will be always reminded of the connection you share and the vows you have made today. Jean, please, repeat after me;

I, Jean..."

"I, Jean..."

"present you, y/n, with this ring..."

"as a symbol of our everlasting love."

"Let it never lose its luster..."

"just as my love for you will never fade."

Jean, still gently holding your hand, slips the ring on (whatever finger your culture uses for weddings!). He can't help but admire it for a moment. He looks back up at you with the biggest grin. All you had to do was place the ring on his finger and your marriage would be "official".

"y/n, repeat after me. I, y/n..."

"I, y/n..."

"present you, Jean, with this ring..."

"as a symbol of our everlasting love..."

"let it never lose its luster..."

"just as my love for you will never fade."

You slip the ring onto Jean's left finger.

"By the power vested in me by the Ymir Life Church and Paradis, under the eyes of the Ymir, I happily pronounce you Husband and Wife! Jean, kiss your bride."

At that moment, everyone disappeared. It was just you and Jean. Jean places a hand on your waist and pulls you in. You find your hands riding up his chest and resting on his shoulder as you get closer. You and Jean connect and all of sudden, you're not in that bubble anymore.

"Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time, I give you Mr. Kirstein and Mrs. l/n!!."

You and Jean left together as "spouses". The first thing you did was official wedding photoshoots that were to be spread all over Paradis and all over the world- thanks to social media. Y'all kinda look like Meghan and Harry tbh.

Anyway.

You both got an opportunity to change in your reception outfits. After that, it was another car ride to the reception venue. Jean held your hand and couldn't stop talking about how beautiful you looked. You were so flustered, you couldn't get a response out. When you reached the venue, the driver helped out first and Jean slipped out of the car after you. He took your hand and entered the reception venue with you.

When you entered the dining hall, you were welcomed by cheers and claps. It was extremely overwhelming- not in a bad sense, however. You looked around the room and caught some familiar faces. You saw Bertholdt and Reiner sitting at a table with another unfamiliar girl. Across the room, Mikasa is seated with Connie, Historia, and Ymir. Everyone else is family that Levi most likely reached out to.

You and Jean take a seat and the cheering calms down. You lean on Jean's shoulder and sigh. The day wasn't over yet, but you were already so tired. Jean places his head on top of yours. "I can't wait to just be with you. I don't know what you had planned tonight but to be honest, I just want to sleep. I haven't realized how tired I was until now," Jean says quietly. "I have to agree. Let's just take a shower, cuddle and just pass out."

Jean brings his head up and smirks at you. "A shower? Together?" You only roll your eyes jokingly. "Oh, look, I think Levi is gonna call us up to have our first dance." "Don't worry, I'll get my answer sooner or later, y/n. You can't run from me." Jean pokes your arm teasingly, which causes you to squirm a little bit. Levi calls you up and Jeans takes your hand to lead you to the dance floor.

(Song of your choice) starts playing and you're not even sure where to start. Jean has a hand on your waist and is holding your free hand. You have a hand on his shoulders. "I'm not even sure where to start, we never practiced," you whisper. Jean smiles softly. "Don't worry about it. We're in this together aren't we?" He begins to move, taking full control. You stumble a bit but your reception dress hides your clumsiness. After a bit, you weren't stumbling anymore. You rest your head on Jean's shoulder and he pulls you even closer. Your movements get even slower. The music slowly disappeared and so did everyone else. It was just you and Jean.

When the music actually came to an end, you pulled away slowly. "You did great," Jean says softly. "So did you." You both go back to your seats. Waiters started to come out and take everyone's orders for dinners and started to pour drinks- meaning a toast would be coming up.

Mikasa comes up to the dance floor and awkwardly clanks her glass, trying to get everyone's attention. Everyone turned their heads and it wasn't because of the awkward clanking of the glass. There were some 'What the hell is she doing here?'s and 'Eren's b*tch?'s. You could visibly see Mikasa's nervousness so you attempted to lock eyes with her. It took her a while but she could finally look you in the eye. Mikasa clears her throat. "Um, hi. You're probably wondering why I'm here but today is not about me. It's about y/n and Jean. I was once y/n's closets friends until I was pressured to do something that I wouldn't normally do." Mikasa gives Levi a side-eye. The shrimp man crosses his arms and rolls his eyes.

"y/n is absolutely amazing...I can't really put it into words but there's something about her that just make people want to be around her. I can see why Jean fought so hard to be with her."

Jean squeezes your hand when she makes that comment.

"I often think to myself about how y/n could have easily met Jean at a café or a movie theatre or something rather than on TV show. But at the same time, this was good for her...and all of us. Here we discovered the lengths of our friendship and who we really were as people. I believe these ups and downs helped y/n find Jean- her true love. Honestly, I wish you both a happy future. Make it worth it."

Mikasa raises her glass and everyone clinks their glass with their neighbors. Connie begins to walk up to the dance floor as soon as Mikasa leaves.

"I'm going to be really honest with you. This is was unexpected. I honestly thought that today was going to be about me." Connie raises his eyebrows at Jean, who furrows them.

"But I guess it's a good thing I didn't marry y/n. I wouldn't have been enough to handle. So, congrats to you, Jean. You're tolerable."

Connie gets off the dance floor without giving you or Jean a look. You look at Jean and he's hurt. "H-hey...maybe he's drunk or something. In his feelings, you know? Don't let him make you feel bad," you say. Jean gives you a small smile before sipping down his drink.

Moments later, it was time for parent dances. Jean got up to dance with his mom. It was a little bit uncoordinated than yours but they looked like they were having a lot of fun.

Next was the bouquet and garter toss. You started with the garter first. You sat in a chair with your legs cross. You knew this was going to happen but it wasn't rehearsed. Jean could see your uneasiness, so he started doing a silly sensual dance. It made you laugh and your laughter got louder once he started shimming down to the floor. He got closer to your thigh and you felt your face heating up. You slapped your hand over your mouth once he starting biting the garter and pulling it off. As he continued, you cupped your face. When Jean was finally day, cheers erupted and you uncovered your hot face. Jean closes his eyes and throws the garter into the crowd and it lands in the hands of Reiner. The guys cheer even louder for him as he awkwardly glances over at Bertholdt, who is a few people away from him.

Next was the bouquet throwing. You closed your eyes and the guest counted you off. Once you heard the number three, you threw the bouquet. You open your eyes and turn around to see that Bertholdt had gotten the flowers. His face is so red...he look like a tomato.

After your guest settled down, it was time to cut your cake, meaning that your wedding day was almost over. You picked a (cake of your choice) for tonight. "It looks delicious. I can't wait to try it," Jean whispers in your ear. "It is. You'll love it," you respond. You pick up a knife. Jean wraps his hands around yours. You both gently place the knife on the cake and pushed it down. You lean back to give Jean a kiss and he gives you one. Jean grabs two forks by the cake and hands one over to you.

Jean scoops a piece of the cake first. He places a hand on your chin and you open your mouth. "Ladies first," he says as he places the cake in your mouth. You take a minute to savor the taste before swallowing. You also take a piece of the cake and get on your toes to feed Jean. He chuckles softly at your struggle before taking the fork from you and feeding himself. "You're right, it's good," he says after swallowing. He bends down slightly to give you another kiss.

The night was slowly coming to an end. There was no sight of Connie after his stupid speech and Levi and Erwin were getting ready to get home. Historia and Ymir had left right after the cake cutting ceremony but had promised to call you once everything had settled down. You and Jean formally greeted your guest and started your goodbyes.

Mikasa had gone up to you with a slightly awkward face. "Today wasn't so bad, huh?" she starts. You give her a kind smile. "It wasn't. Did you enjoy yourself?" Mikasa pauses to answer. "Your wedding was beautiful...however, I can't get upset over the reaction about me being here. y/n, I have to apologize again. What I did was completely wrong. I shouldn't even be blaming Levi for everything. I could have told you at first and-"

You pull Mikasa into a hug to shut her up. "Mikasa, move on. Come on, we're adults! At least you're apologizing and trying- unlike someone we know," you joke. You pull away. "Hopefully, if Jean and I have a real wedding, it won't be as awkward for you." Mikasa nods. "I'll see you around. Congrats." As Mikasa walks off, Reiner, Bert, and this mystery blonde come up to you. Inside Reiner's pocket is your garter sticking out and Bertholdt is clenching your bouquet.

"Hey," you start," Thank you for coming. Who's your friend?"

Bertholdt looks over at the blonde. "Thank you for inviting us...um...this is Annie. My dad thought you were her."

Now, why did Bertie's dad think you was this yt girl?😟

LMAO. "Nice to keep you, Annie. You Bertie's girl?" you ask.

Annie shakes her head no frantically. "OH, NO. Never in a million years, no. Yuck!" she answers dramatically. Reiner throws an arm over Bert's shoulder. "He's actually my boy now," he says proudly. "OH-! Congrats! So we're having a wedding for you soon, yes?" You tease. Reiner nods and Bertie tries to hide his face in Reiner's hair. "When did this all happen...? I just eliminated you like...two weeks ago?"

"Well...Reiner and I were still in contact and when I left, he reached out to me. We met up a few times and we hit it off," Bertie explains. "Congrats. I'm really happy to hear that," you answer. You turn around to look for Jean. He's talking to his mom. He gives you a small glance before continuing his conversation with her. "I better go catch up with Jean. It was nice to see you...and finally meeting you, Annie." The trio say their goodbyes before leaving.

You make your way over to Jean but you're stopped by the human fit of annoyance- Levi. You were so tired of him but you threw on a smile since Erwin was walking over as well. "Yes, Levi? I thought we were done here," you say in a singsong voice. "Aw, you're ready to go?" Levi says sarcastically. You open your mouth to answer but he cuts you off. "For starters, thank you for adding on to mine and Erwin's paychecks. We really appreciate it. Arrangements for your hotel and honeymoon have been put together. You're tired of me, but don't hesitate to call me if something goes wrong. Besides that, I wish you luck. Make everything worth it."

Levi walks past you and Erwin stops to hug you before following his husband.

Jean makes his way up to you, his mom following behind. "Everything good? I saw shrimp talking to you." You take Jean's hand. "Everything's good." Jean pulls you into a side hug. "Aw, you guys are so cute. I really do hope you last," Jean's mom comments, "I've always wanted a daughter."

"Mom, nothing's official yet-"

"I'm glad you think of me as your daughter, June."

"Well, I'll see you later. Jean, take care of her tonight. Be good to her and listen to her. Don't be rough, she's not a rag doll," June warned her son. She had a finger up in his face and everything. Seeing their relationship on the regular was going going to be hilarious.

Jean swats his mom's finger out of his face before waving her goodbye. He then fully wraps his arms around you. "No offense. But I'm glad this is over. We'll get to know each other one on one now," he says. You can't help but agree.

ITS FINALLY OVER. well not exactly. i have one more chapter to write and y’all will never hear about levi, 12 guys, and dates ever again😭 but since this series has reached its goal (you getting married) please do me a favor and rate my series, it would be appreciated!

#black!reader #jean kirstein x reader #aot x black! reader #jean x black!reader #jean x reader #bertholdt x reader #connie spinger x reader #onyankopon x reader #eren x reader #reiner x reader #aot x reader #floch x reader #porco x reader #colt grice x reader #nicolo x reader #armin arlert x reader

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dragon-swords-prophecies · 3 years ago

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Frost & Fire: Update!

Frost & Fire draft 0 is officially over 10,000 words!!!!!!!!!!!

Yay!!!!!!!

Taglist so they can share in this very good news: @gr3y-heron @golden-eyed-writer @writing-is-a-martial-art @magic-is-something-we-create

Also in celebration:

Excerpt time!

Below the cut is an (Unedited, so you are warned and I am sorry) excerpt from Chapter 7, in which Zerve has finally showed up and now I get to write them except it isn't going as well as anyone hoped, Dash & Ana are fighting, and also there is the slight problem with a dragon who wants to take over the world.

Word Count: 819

~~~~~~

Ana went pale. My father looked almost transparent, so much blood had left his face.

Cerea mouthed, 'oh', eyes widening until they were as big as saucers.

That person, in the armor, with silver and black hair, was quite possibly my sibling.

"Uh," I said after a long moment. "You wouldn't happen to be the Zerve Galendel that died 450 years ago, would you?"

"Why do you ask? And I am certainly not dead."

"Because," I sighed. "My last name is Galendel. And so is hers." I added, pointing at Ana.

"Well shit. You must be my replacements. Pleased to meet you." And they turned on their heel and walked away. Enna groaned, "Lanri save me from proud Elves," and chased after them. I'm not sure what she said to get the Commander to come back but she said something that worked.

Commander Galendel came stalking back, face livid and eyes hard.

"Alright. I'm here only for the sake of our countries mutual survival. Tell me what you need to do and I'll get out and end the awkward family reunion."

Cessari looked at his daughters, who nodded agreement. "Okay then. What we need is plain and simple. We need reinforcements. Halmire can't take on Dizerdrat on her own. We need help. Is Bryn's Army willing to help us?"

"Give me thirty seconds." The Commander spoke quickly into a stone, presumably one modified to cast Message. They got a response seconds later, though the little of the voice I could hear sounded irritated and tired, which made sense. Bryn was far enough away that it was late into the evening there now.

"The Queen says 'Yes, Bryn will help you'. Where do we start?"

"We start with a plan."

-X-X-X-

Thirty minutes later we were all gathered back in the war room, much like we had been two and a half weeks ago. It was more crowded this time, standing room only.

Neither of the previous ambassadors were anywhere to be seen. Seated three people to a side, we were in close quarters around the square table.

Starting with me, on my left was Lei then Theo, on the next side was Ana, Cerea, and my father. The third side held the baron, his closest advisor- Geoff Kraghammer of Der Bulder- and the new commander, Zerve. The final side had Enna, Anne, and Grandfather. Anne didn't strictly have clearance to attend this meeting, but she would sneak in somehow anyway so it was better to have her just here.

Mae probably should have been there, but she wasn't. Only one druid allowed at a meeting. Druid's Council law. Faith and her were probably in the secret passage between this room and Oleski headquarters. I was 100% not supposed to know about that one.

A large map of Aqurah was spread out on the table, with little figures representing each army. One figure stood for 1000 soldiers, approximately. They were the colors of each country, Halmire blue and silver and Bryn black and white.

Qu, the archmage, floated in the corner, still perched on his hand-stool.

And me? I sat in my chair, tossing a small ball of shadows between my fingertips. It was calming. Drew some odd looks from my apparent sibling, but it was calming and I also didn't care.

"So." Said Enna, letting her single word hung in the air.

"What do we do?"

"We figure out where he is planning to strike first."

Enna pulled a dagger out of it's sheathe and stabbed it into the map directly over the Gundar Forest. "Here. It's the last great stronghold of the elves, and he knows that if that's destroyed we loose all military support from them. Then he'll hit the Dwarves, probably Der Bulder first and then the other strongholds that are exposed. Finally he'll hit us, and he'll ignore Bryn because it's across the ocean. No offense," She added, glancing at the Commander.

"None taken. Isn't my home country at any rate."

"Right," Enna nodded slowly. "About that-"

"No."

"Okay then. Any idea folks, or are we just letting the person with no proper military experience whatsoever plan out a war?"

Ana laughed. "No, we're just being quiet. I agree with you, we need to warn A'ssh- er, Celmari. Who's going to do that?"

"I will." Said Anne.

"We are not sending anyone alone." Stated the Baron. "Anne, I swear I'm not just saying this because I'm your father, but you are not going alone. Find someone to go with you. This rule stands for everyone, by the way."

"Fine, dad. Theo, want to come help me warn an ancient Elven civilization of impending doom? Someone who speaks Elven would be nice."

"Sure," Said the human. "I could use a good fight."

"Wonderful. And who's going to warn Der Bulder?"

#WIP: Frost & Fire #frost & fire excerpts #if you have feedback please give me feedback (only if you want to though!)#word count update

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atsunflower · 4 years ago

Text

Let them sing — Intro

Rated: SFW

Author note: Freaking finally. I don't have much to say; this one right here is one of my favorites and I'm really excited to write about the twins.

Warnings: brief mentions of hallucinations and violence. Some cursing.

I — Intro

Previous || Next

He heard them.

Contrary to people's belief, it wasn't a song of agony.

The choir of the deceased chanted as if it was the only thing they could do in the whole eternity, a melancholic melody comfortable to the ears.

"Let'em sing then"

"Oi, Samu. Did ya say something?" His brother asked, sending him a weird glare. It was funny how Atsumu knew him like the back of his hand, even though Osamu would always sport a stoic face and hold onto his nonchalant demeanor.

"Nah, ya hearing things" The grey haired male shrugged, playing it cool. The blond sent him a weird glare but opted to ignore the other. Whatever was on Samu's mind he would figure out eventually.

"Man, I'm so excited" Atsumu rubbed his palms, warming them up in excitement "I've heard that Niiyama boss is a hot shot."

"Yeah, everyone knows it" the male rolled his eyes "Just don't try ta ruin everything, dumbass. Remember this 'Nee-san' woman is known for being hella strict" Osamu warned as they arrived the place.

White walls and black iron gates. The house of Niiyama held a imponent aura, as if the building tried to cover its backstory.

Back then, the place used to be a brothel; the most exquisite one, with women at its finest.

All of this for in one night, two years ago, everything take a turn and change completely: the women here rioted and took over the place. Now, Niiyama was a neutral sisterhood that sold information. Like an oracle, Nee-san knew everything.

"Oi Samu, what d'ya think she looks like?" Atsumu asked as he stopped the car engines.

"I dunno, I don't care." Osamu shrugged. They got out of the vehicle, eyeing the tall girl by the door. "Behave."

"Man, you're no fun" The blond whined while they both walked to the house entrance. "I should have brought Sunarin instead" He heard his brother say before the girl smiled at their presence.

"Good morning. It's a pleasure to have both Inarizaki oyabuns here today" The hostess said bowing at them "My name is Kanoka and I will take you two to Nee-san" She turned her back, opening the door.

"The pleasure is ours, Kanoka-san. We look very forward to meet with Nee-san" Atsumu was quite the flirt, hearing him being so polite would always be a surprise to Osamu.

Well, it was business involving Inarizaki after all.

"The feeling is mutual, Miya-san. It's a surprise you contacted us since your household never showed interest to do business with Nee-san before" Kanoka said without any malice while Atsumu hummed in acknowledgement.

Taking in his surroundings, Osamu noticed the emptiness of the mansion lobby; plain white walls with wide glass windows along a floor covered in white marble. No decoration items nor other people around, this clearness conferring a sad atmosphere to the ample house as this feeling kind of tickled him off.

He didn't have much more time to observe the room as the tall woman led them upstairs. There, the walls painted in the same white took the form of a corridor, as he recalled being being in this place only once to deal with some scumbag who owed Inarizaki money.

Back then, a burgundy wallpaper and golden chandeliers hanging from the ceiling would make aesthetics for shady purposes. Now, even if the aesthetics were for the better, he didn't know what to feel about the building.

At the end of the corridor, a huge door stood imponent. Kanoka knocked the hard wood twice before signaling they both could enter the room.

"I can say it's a surprise to have the remarkable Miya twins at Niiyama" The soft timber welcomed them. Observing their surroundings, they spotted a woman standing by the windows; the morning's light made her skin glow as she slowly turned to face the duo.

Osamu felt his breath hitch in his throat, but the male would be lying if he said it was because of your beauty.

There was something about you that he would recognize even if he was blind.

Your eyes held the same dullness of his.

What a woman like you would have done to have the very eyes of a sinner like him?

"I heard you guys suffered some setbacks a while ago" The gray haired male saw his twin holding back a scoff at her words. The woman signaled them to sit as she took three cups and poured green tea into it. "I have a vague idea of it, but first I gotta know if you guys are willing to take what we have to offer" She stretched some wrinkles on her black dress, waiting for their response as she set the cups in front of them.

"We're pretty much worried to come at ya. As ya said, it's the first time Inarizaki meets Niiyama" Osamu couldn't hold the urge to talk to her "But we're putting lots of money on it. We ain't paying for tittle-tattle" It wasn't his intention to sound so harsh, but he didn't know how to feel about this place.

The male observed her neutral face as she took a sip from the rich tea, warily eyeing him.

"Do you know the difference between rumours and information, Miya-san?" The male opened his mouth to reply but she beated him to it "Rumour is when you and your Kobun, Suna, went to that love hotel and people assumed you were some sort of lovers" The flat tone held no provocation. It was just you stating you really knew things, and it still made him pissed. "Information is the fact you two went there to get rid of that Danzo guy involved with prostitution"

"How do ya know it?" He heard Atsumu's alarmed voice from his left. You turned your attention to the blond male, sighing.

"That's the point of Niiyama, Miya-san" His brother cursed as you kept collected "Don't worry, we didn't sell this info to anyone"

"And why is that?" It was his turn to ask.

"Because we appreciate what you did"

I like her sincerity, Osamu decided.

"Well, Inarizaki is known for protecting women" Atsumu's foul mouth stated, lacing each word with pride. You lifted an eyebrow at it, distaste briefly crossing your features — the only glimpse of emotion you showed in the whole conversation, he noticed.

"Very rich, considering you both handed your sister in a silver plate to Itachiyama"

Osamu heard the voices snickering. Pathetic.

You didn't even flinch when Atsumu slammed the porcelain cup onto the coffee table. You patiently waited for his outburst to unfold.

"We didn't come here ta be disrespected!"

"Did I lie, Miya-san?" Your question wasn't provocative, but bothered Osamu too.

"Atsumu, shut it" The gray haired man stared at you before continuing. "We have other matters to discuss. What do you know about Johzenji?"

The woman inhaled deeply, shifting on her seat.

"That's the problem. I don't know anything about it"

❥ taglist: @ukaiwachin @keekee-732 @chiibichann @captain-shittykawa @idiot-juice-enthusiast @tomo-uwu @ushijima-meixiu @bimboiiying @ohmythatmiya @onigiriimiya @keuromi @trash4sportsanime @jihoonspout @fortheloveofbakugo @sweetfntsii @yikerb @akaaaashit @lilacshouko @sehunosh @bap-kingdom @sakusakymi @namyari @voids-universe @kylalily @xanaxdeity @raenebalgaire @apollochjld

Taglist: open. Send an ask to be added.

#miya osamu scenarios #osamu scenarios #osamu x reader #miya osamu x reader #miya osamu #hq osamu #haikyuu miya osamu #miya osamu imagines #miya x reader #inarizaki x reader #inarizaki #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader

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rogue-barnes-16 · 5 years ago

Text

BLUE

Summary: Y/n tries to bury her feelings after making a terribly bad decision about Bucky that destroyed what they had. It backfires in the worst possible way.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Genre: 90% angst

Tags:

Submitted for @blushycarol's writing challenge.

Permanent taglist: @notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @1a-girl-has-no-name1 @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125 @unlikelygalaxygiver

Warnings: language, makeout, implicit sex, feels™️

A/N: this is my prompted songfic for blushycarol's writing challenge! It took a turn like, ngl I did whatever the fuck I wanted with the song but it fits so there it goes, enjoy <3.

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

We've broken up and now I regret it

I said goodbye when I shouldn't have said it

"I fixed your boy. He's awake now." She spoke through the wakandan device. "Figured you'd want to see him."

Yeah, it was the princess of Wakanda herself who decided to call me —not even Steve, me— to inform me that the man I loved had finally awaken.

A couple of hours later, T'challa did with Steve the same thing Shuri had done with me, and soon we both left to reach the hidden city.

We met with Bucky.

Steve cried a couple of times, Bucky laughed in a few occasions, and I stayed rather quiet almost the entire time.

After two days, Steve left with the promise of coming back, but I stayed just because I had missed him so much, I didn't feel like saying goodbye just yet.

Despite this, we didn't talk much in those months I had stayed with him. It wasn't like we spoke a lot before, but now it felt different.

I knew why; it was because of me. Because maybe, just maybe, I was terrified that this new version of him, that healed James Barnes, wouldn't love me like his broken self did.

We had reached a point where I didn't know what we were any longer, and I was 100% sure that the feeling was mutual, we were just too scared to talk it out.

I took the easiest, most despicable way and, one morning, I left Wakanda, hoping to spare my heart and breaking his in the process.

A week later I was back, suited up and ready to fight the deadliest threat I would have faced in my whole life.

I survived.

Bucky didn't, and the only thing I could think was that had lost him, and the last words I said to him were 'this is over, I'm leaving you'.

Five Years Later

I even cried but I never meant it

And I don't know why but I can't forget it, forget it

When Fury paired us to go on a mission, I thought it would be easy due to the action, but it turned out to be a watch, and suddenly everything was ten times more difficult.

We had been in silence for at least a long, tedious hour, in a dark room with two windows, waiting for the target to appear, when Bucky spoke.

"Is it true?" I, pretty much confused, turned my head to him, whose eyes were already on me, his back reclined against the wall before me. "that you cried for me." his voice held kinds of fear that I had never heard in him.

"who told you that?" I inquired, starting to get anxious because no one was supposed to know that; no one had seen me breaking down every night for months because of him.

"Steve." he replied, digging his eyes on mines. "Did you?"

My fight or flight instincts made me shook my head no as an initial response, only because of the sudden panic flooding through my veins. "I mean yes- I- no I mean I- I cried for everyone and I just... it-" I attempted to calm myself down before letting out a propper sentence. "it meant nothing. I did, I just didn't... I felt guilty" I finished, my heart racing and pounding as if it would leave my chest. "for everyone I couldn't save."

He didn't say anything else, nor did I.

After our short chat everything was even worse, because I was no longer focused now that the sorrow I had felt those nights was replaying in my head non-stop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gimme love, gimme dreams, gimme a good self esteem

We remained distant, but at some point, Bucky started to compliment me, to make nice comments, to give me quick smiles and fast 'thank you's, and I would be lying if I said I didn't treasure them.

"You look... great." He'd shyly say whenever I got dolled up.

"Great shot" he would state breathless, passing me by during a mission, to which I would just nod. "Thank for having my back."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Your hair..." he once trailed off with a frown, resting his elbows over the counter.

"yeah, I needed a change." for a second, the part of me I had hidden crawled up to the surface and I asked. "You... Don't like it?"

"No- I mean yes- I- I really like it." he assured me with bittersweet smile. "It fits you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gimme good and pure, what you waiting for?

Gimme everything, all your heart can bring

Something good and true

I don't wanna feel blue anymore

"Barnes and you." Sharon spoke, closing the pantry's door behind her.

"what?" I questioned, turning to her for a moment while she raised her eyebrow at me.

"what are you playing at, Y/n?" she asked, a bit of concern being noticeable in her tone.

We weren't close. No, no we hadn't grown closer, but I sometimes would sit right besides him during Saturday's take-out night, near enough for our thighs to brush.

I'd let him play with my hair from time to time, I'd allow him to come to my room in the middle of the night to lay with me after a nightmare here and there.

I wouldn't complain when his hands held my cheeks in the aftermath of a rough mission, his eyes scanning me with worry and sorrow while pain would most likely be rushing through my body.

I wouldn't scold him if he ever picked me up to carry me into the medical wing after I had gotten injured, even if I could walk. Maybe I would even cling on his neck, feeling his heartbeat fastening.

"We're not playing." I replied noctant, pouring four glasses of wine for all of us.

"Y/n" I sighed. "why are you doin' this to him? You're gonna hurt him and you."

"I don't wanna feel blue." I confessed in a mutter. "no one'll get hurt, I just... Need what he gives me."

Sharon stared at me dumbfounded for a couple of seconds before shaking her head and leaving, mumbling something my ears couldn't catch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gimme one more night

One last goodbye

Let's do it one last time

One more time

It was during Sam's birthday that I gathered the courage to do what I, deep inside, so badly wanted to do.

I saw my opportunity the moment Bucky approached the barcounter to grab some random drink.

I left mine on a shelf and rushed to reach him and I passed by him, but on my way out of the room, my hand discreetly found his and tugged him with me.

I didn't stop until we reached the nearest room , which happened to be the bathroom.

Without a word, I got him inside and closed the door, backing against it and, with his fingers still intertwined with mine, I pulled Bucky into a kiss.

He stopped after a few seconds. His eyes were sad as he gazed into mines, and I felt a lump in my throat.

"I..." my attempt to speak triggered my tears, and his response was to cares my cheeks and peck my lips.

The terror I had felt 5 years ago of me not being good enough for him to love me anymore came back. My heart pounded against my chest, the voice in the back of my head simultaneously begging me to stop.

"I need this... Just..." I fisted his shirt, bringing him closer to me. "one last time... Please I-"

"are you drunk right now?" he questioned, putting a strand of hair away from my face.

"No." I half lied, pulling him to me into a needy kiss which quickly escalated.

No, I don't love you

No, I don't care

I just want to be held when I'm scared

And all I want is one night with you

Just 'cause I'm selfish

I know it's true

What had happened in the party was never spoken about, nor mentioned.

We had swept it under the rug for both of our sakes —mostly for mine.

We didn't sleep together again, but in very few occasions, I would end up tugging him to some dark place where we were alone and make out until I was out of breath.

Each time that happened, for some reason I didn't understand, Bucky always whispered me the same question.

"Do you love me?"

To which I answered a breathless, painful 'no' that would most likely end up crushing my heart because of the heavy weight that lie carried.

My nightmares at some point had gotten worse, now involving Bucky getting hurt almost every time, so, whenever I woke up in cold sweat with tears in my eyes, gasping his name, I would make my way to his room and lay down besides him.

He would wake up the moment my body touched the mattress, and, as soon as I was under the sheets, he would pull me into his chest with his arms around me, asking me the same question every time.

"what was it about?"

To which I selfishly responded with:

"don't wanna talk. Just hold me, please."

I'm sick of looking after you

I need a man to hold on to

I'm bored of everything we do

But I just keep coming back to you

The first time I snuck under his sheets I promised myself it would be just that one night, that I would allow myself to be so fucking selfish just for one night, but his embrace was so comforting, so welcoming, and his heartbeat and breathing were so soothing, that I ended up being selfish every damn time.

One night, instead of reaching his room scared and trembling, I reached it with anger and frustration taking over my body.

I shut the door loud enough to make him sit upright, staring at me concerned.

"I'm fucking tired of this" I growled. "I'm tired of this nightmares, I'm sick of seeing you dying, I'm fucking done with looking after you in every mission more than I look after myself" I reached a point where I was close to shout as I stepped to the bed. "I want this to fucking stop!"

"Y/n-"

"I can't keep up with this anymore, I'm going crazy because it's ALWAYS THE SAME SHIT."

"You're tired." he stated, climbing off the bed to hesitantly step to me. "You need to sleep."

"I need to fucking get this off my damn chest!" a choked sob escaped my lips. "I keep coming back to you and I hate myself because of this! Because this is my fault!"

"Y/n please..." he wrapped his arms around me and I fought him a little before giving in, breaking down to tears the moment he kissed my temple.

"I was so scared of you not loving me anymore that I fucked everything up" I managed to explain in a vague mumble between sobs. "You're okay and I was fucking scared of not being good enough- I still am... I just keep making it worse!"

He stroke my hair and pulled me even closer. "Doll..."

The door few open and I heard Sam's voice behind me. "What was that? Are you-" Bucky shook my head over me and signaled Sam to leave.

"I love you so much please I'm sorry" he pulled me to the bed without letting go of me and threw the blanket over us.

"I know you do." he assured me intertwining his fingers with mines and placing a kiss on my knuckles. "I love you. I always will." he whispered soothingly.

Gimme everything, all your heart can bring

Something good and true

I don't wanna feel blue anymore

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