#if those tapes exist or pieces of then exist i need to find them. i think i've seen some floating around

[offthewall1979]

my review of Moonwalk: hot mess. ★★★.

[cursingtoji]

🎙️ just saw your post asking about blog recs…step up to the stage bc i need some!!!!

BLOGS RECOMMENDATION <3

— mostly jjk, but also chainsaw man and aot

*taping the mic* okay here are my nominees with some fics recomendations as well

disclaimers!

lemme start saying so plot is everything to me, pwp can be hot but i'll hardly remember it afterwards, that being said here's some writers that can do both great plots and hot scenes.

also while digging i realize i wasn’t following some of those and if you noticed im sorry im dumb but i truly love your writing.

i tried to tag every active blog i could remember but it’s possible i forgot a few since i’ve been reading more jjk recently. if i forgot you im so sorry please don’t take offense.

many blogs i loved were deactivated, rest in piece great works they had.

everything i read i reblog under the tag #recs

@thekillingmoonmoon ofc moon is the first one i think when the topic "best writers" come up, i freaking love her and everything she does its not even fair to pick one thing so im picking 3, this super passionate toji work that i re-read at an alarming frequency (which btw i consider my own personal gift). yakuza choso and yuki aka the hottest duo ever. the cherry on top is her kishibe series (just realized i gotta catch up on)

@rinhaler - luxe is def on my top 3, she comes up with very organic scenes. even if it's a simple plot she can develop it so originally. I recently read her underground fighter!sukuna and i'm still thinking about it.

@laudthingcat has the best headcanons in the jjk fandom hands down, it’s the perfect dose of hot funny and cute, pick anything from her masterlist it’s guaranteed you’ll have a good time reading it. when you moan their name in your sleep in particular gives me butterflies

@meownotgood is obviously the best aki writer out there, you can see the love for aki in their words and how they write him so well and so into character. arrival in tokyo is truly a masterpiece, they also have a +100k words series i've been wanting to read for a while but i want to rewatch chainsaw man first hehe, i'm 100% sure is fire tho.

@kentoangel roma writes choso like she's in love with him and you can tell. shes always on my for you and even her snippets are *chefs kiss* special kudos to stepbrother!choso

@kentopedia i just realized i'm assigning a writer per character and nanami is definitely rylie's. the domestic lovely way she writes him makes me forget canon.

@tojisun another blog that is very often on my for you page. cannot talk about toji fics without bringing up sun, everything she writes about him has me furiously nodding. not to mention simon and konig, just talking about them makes me wanna run to her blog and binge read everything

@chocochipsushi 's bodyguard toji is unforgetable to me, i wish i lost my memory so i could read it all again for the first time. bodyguard toji is the definition of living rent free in my mind, whenever i have to deal with annoying coworkers i immediately think “bodyguard toji would not allow them to talk to me like that”

@suget one of the greatest geto writers for sure, they have so many geto works, i was going through their blog to find the one i read more recently and there was so many others i haven’t seen! another writer i could very easily spend a whole day binge reading. btw this cult leader one was recommended to me and i fell in love with it <3

@staryukis has the cutest gojo drabbles

@tonycries brooklin baby was recommended to me by moon and it had me by the neck! also they have many other works im hoping to read soon as well

@mommypieck isayama created reiner but they created subby reiner

@titan-fodder ‘s the tinniest notion The Best Reiner fic in all the existence of the universe (tw: stepcest kinda?)

@nanaslutt mma!toji made feel every emotion possible so intensely

[nonbinary-octopus]

recently, I purchased a small bluetooth mouse to assist me in my in-bed reading times. You see, I like to lie down and position my phone in a comfortable spot for reading, held in place by my blankets and sheets.

The only trouble is that this position necessitates a hand by the phone to scroll, but sometimes I would want to have my hands under the blankets, for warmth or just because the position out of the blankets was getting uncomfortable on my joints.

My wife saw a short video of someone using a bluetooth scrolling ring, and mentioned it to me. I desired it immediately and set out to purchase it. Unfortunately, however, I could not find the sort of ring my wife had seen; all I could find were rings intended to scroll through tiktok, and though I purchased one and tried it, it turned out to scroll more than a screen's height when I pressed the buttons, and was thus useless.

So I figured I'd try the next best thing, a very small mouse with a scroll wheel. I purchased the smallest bluetooth mouse I could find, connected it to my phone, and voila! I could scroll. Except, the cursor was visible. And if I shifted the mouse at all in my reading, of course the cursor would move as well. I would position it out of the way near the bottom of the screen, and it would gradually wander back up and be in the way again. I ended up sticking a bandaid over the sensor, which kept it in place.

Unfortunately, each time I connected the mouse to my phone, the cursor started in the center of the screen, so I would have to reposition it each time, and I didn't want to keep putting on and removing the bandaid, especially as the couple times I had done so already had caused it to no longer lie quite flat, and it was an irritating texture to touch.

So I set the mouse aside for a while.

Yesterday, I thought I would try it again, and with a new solution. I crafted a paper cuff that would slide up over the mouse, hiding the motion sensor so that it would stay still

This worked for a couple minutes. But it didn't fit snugly and kept shifting, and more importantly, I had to put it on after turning the mouse on and positioning it, and the mouse would respond to this by moving the cursor down. This might not sound like too much of a problem, but actually, if the cursor goes too far down, scrolling stops working because the mouse is no longer on the active window.

So I added another piece:

a thin strip formed into a loop, taped onto the base of the mouse such that I could fold it back and expose the sensor, and then fold it back into place rather than sliding, and then slide the cuff on. Additionally, the loop fit like a ring to hold the mouse without needing to grip it.

This worked very well! I used it for several hours with only minor issues.

However, those minor issues did exist, and I wished to improve the model further to correct them. Firstly, the cursor did still shift somewhat. This was due in part to the cuff being somewhat loose, and in part due to the paper covering the sensor also being the ring, so when I shifted my grip, it might shift the cover.

Secondly, it turns out that if I hold a mouse in one hand under my cozy blankets for long enough, my hand starts to get Very Tired of the texture of the plastic, and of the bits of tape I was touching—especially the edges. Touching the paper was still fine, however. So now I have version 3 of the mouse sheath:

First: a strip of paper, taped at the base of the mouse and coming up to cover the sensor. Second, a sheath which covers the entire mouse, not just a portion of it. It has a cutout for the scroll wheel. As a bonus, the first strip sticks out of the top, for easier removal from the sheath. Third, a loop taped onto the back of the sheath to stick my finger through. It is very carefully taped such that I shouldn't be touching tape on the inside of the ring, though there is some near it.

I shall be testing this version shortly, and will report back on its usefulness.

[kitsunesakii]

Spider in the Dark

This was SO MUCH FUN

Chapter Five

Sasha hummed in satisfaction as the program she had been working on finally yielded. An address popped up on the screen and she frowned. That warehouse was definitely empty. The police had cornered a small group of the People's Church along with Author Nolan; he was dead. Well, honestly probably not. Sasha had seen enough to not trust such a hopeful claim. But he couldn't still be there? 

She had been researching the claims that some statement givers had given on the Stranger. Honestly it was just idle work until Jon gave her a real task. But one search had led to another and now she was staring at an address that was supposedly where a mannequin had been dropped off for maintenance. So why was it the same warehouse as Author's group?  

It wasn't a mistake on her end. And she doubted it was a coincidence. Those didn't seem to exist in this place. Maybe Jon knew something about it, Sasha moved to stand when Jon's door flew open and Jon paused, looking around before frowning. 

"Where is everybody?" 

"Martin went to investigate a lead and Tim's taking some sort of vacation day." 

Jon scowled and Sasha grinned. "I, however, am right here and not busy at the moment." Besides the mystery of the warehouse but that was a side project at best. 

"I need to follow up on a location someone left us about a statement, it was last week so I hope to find something useful."

"Alright, where?"

He squinted at the paper and read the coordinates. Her eyes shot up. 

"Jon, that's the same warehouse they had the ambush at." She gestured to her computer screen. "What statement was it about?"

"An artifact delivered by Michael Silesa. I think Gertrude was looking into it, I found an older recording-"

"I'm going to stop you there," Sasha cut him off and rubbed her temples. "Have you really thought about this? This seems like a trap."

"Possibly. I'm going to check it out."

"I'm coming with you." She was leading him out of the basement before he could protest, glancing back just in time to see him stuff a recorder in his pocket. Sasha rolled her eyes. Recently he had been jumpier, at first she had thought it was just because of the worms. Then she shrugged off the suspicion to the fact that even after a very annoying, very persistent argument on why Micheal seemed interested in protecting her and having to listen to him list off all the reasons it was a horrible idea, she still didn't  change her mind. But now she was starting to think the paranoia was from something else, and if Jon needed a little extra confirmation of her loyalty she was willing to provide it. Hell just about anything to get out of the office. 

"But we aren't going anywhere without torches, and I'm going to text Tim to give us three hours and if he doesn't hear back to call the cops."

Jon frowned. "That won't be necessary."

"Tough." She said simply, shooting Tim a text as they entered into the afternoon sun. 

----------------------------------------------

"This is definitely a trap." Sasha said matter of fact as they looked over a piece of paper that had been taped to the side door of the large industrial warehouse. The paper had the words "A Guest for Mr. Spider." Printed nicely. She hadn't the slightest idea what that meant but it left Jon three shades paler than before which told her all she needed to know. "We should leave." 

"I'm not leaving." Jon put the paper in his pocket and opened the door. "I need answers."

She followed in after him and quickly grabbed his arm. He paused long enough to allow her to hand him a torch. It was pitch black in there. 

They walked forwards and she tried to remember where they were. Along the wall she spotted a yellow door. She wasn't sure whether to be relieved or not. 

"What does the note mean?" Her question echoed. 

"Nothing."

"It must have meant something with the way you balked at it."

"Why are you so curious about it?" His words settled around them with an accusatory bite. 

Sasha rolled her eyes. "Oh I don't know, maybe it has something to do with the fact that I'm following you blindly into a place that could kill us?" Her heart was hammering in her ears. God she hated the dark, she shifted her grip on his wrist. Even with the torch she could barely see the wall beside them. 

"Well excuse me, I don't see the danger you could possibly be in with how close you are to deadly monsters." 

There was no way he was doing this right now. And Sasha knew that she shouldn't be fueling it but her nerves had her on edge and her filter was left at the door of the warehouse. 

"I don't appreciate your passive aggressive tone."

"I don't like being lied to." His words bordered on a growl. 

Realistically she knew the stress of it all was hitting him. They should leave now, she had already started to lose track of direction and he wasn't helping. 

Sasha tried to remain calm as she answered. "I haven't lied to you." She slowed them to a stop and looked around. "Jon, maybe we should leave."

"Why, " He ripped his wrist free and shined the torch directly in her face. "Why should I believe anything you've said to me? For all I know you wrote the note, I saw you already knew the location of this warehouse before I even brought it up."

Sasha swore the darkness was getting darker around them. Her calm was slipping. 

"Yes I was looking up a statement that had to do with the warehouse, specifically about a mannequin that was delivered here. I don't know anything about the note or why it might be significant, that's why I asked." She could barely see him over the blinding light in her eyes. Alarms were going off in her head that they needed to start looking for an exit. "Listen I know it's been a hard two weeks since Prentiss and all-"

"How would you know? You've been in the clear, chatting up the bloody distortion!" 

Obviously he wasn't finished with their previous argument. She heard a sound to the left and her head snapped in that direction, aiming her torch into fog. Was there always fog? She was shaking, woefully aware that they hadn't brough anything to arm themselves with. 

"Jon, please, can we please have this later-"

"For all I know you've brought me here to kill me, you certainly seem panicked enough." 

Sasha was just about done with his paranoia. "Damn it Jon, I'm scared of the dark!"

No sooner were the words out when both their torches flickered and died. 

Sasha just about lunged at Jon, gripping whatever she could as tight as she could. "You can accuse me of murder after we live long enough to get out of here. Now please tell me you still have extra torches in your bag." 

"Right. Yeah, yeah, I'm going to need you to let go of my shoulder a moment- thank you."

There was the sound of shuffling fabric then both of them froze. To the left she could hear a distinct clicking sound followed by tapping. She swore it sounded like footsteps, but too many to be human. She squeezed his arm. "Light, Jon, light." She whispered. 

The sound of a zipper followed a small swear from Jon. 

"They won't turn on."

Shit. "Jonathan Sims, if I die because of your paranoia for me I swear to Christ I will kill you." She needed to think. "Ok, the wall was to the left of us, if we can find the wall then we can find a way out."

He let out a shaky breath and they started moving, pausing every once in a while when the tapping got closer. 

Sasha held her breath as they walked in the supposed direction, her heart ricocheting in her ears, but this couldn't be right, they should have hit a wall by now. Jon made a small sound of disapproval and they both stopped for a moment. 

Sasha remembered her phone and used one hand to rip it out of her pocket, trying to turn it on. Dead. 

Because of course it was. 

Her gaze snapped to the left of her, she swore she had heard a sound. Not the clicking like before, it almost sounded like-

Something wrapped around her arm and she nearly screamed, nearly, quickly shoving her free hand over her mouth, dropping her phone. 

"What, Sasha what?" Jon's voice trembled with fear low and close to her ear. 

Laughter. She had heard laughter. And not just anyones. 

Before she could process an answer she was being pulled lightly, and in response she pulled Jon as well. They walked in silence for what felt like years, Sasha being led blind until she heard the subtle sound of hinges and the hand that was pulling her was gone. 

It took her a moment to realize she was in front of a door. She didn't need to see the color to know where it led. 

Her grip around Jon tightened and she felt him move closer. "What, why have we stopped?"

"I- I think I found us a way out, a door, but, Jon I already know you don't trust me but-" 

"If you found an exit why aren't we taking it?"

Sasha gripped the handle tightly. "I don't think this door leads outside." She whispered. 

A beat of silence went by before Jon seemed to understand what she was insinuating. 

"Absolutely bloody not, I will not follow you into whatever hell awaits us through there, there's got to be a better-"

His voice staggered and instantly a loud guttural sound burst through the silence followed by fervent tapping. 

"No time." Sasha threw the door open and pulled Jon inside just as the roar seemed to shake the ground beneath them. The door shut easily, leaving them with just the sound of their heartbeats. 

Sasha allowed herself to breathe again. Tremors were running through her body as she tried to keep composure. This was the final straw, either she was changing departments or Elias was giving her one hell of a raise. 

Sasha hadn't let go of Jon since they crossed into the corridors, and she couldn't hide her relief of sight. Even if the mess and ever changing blur of shapes hurt her mind a little. Sasha looked at Jon, he was leaned over, his hands on his knees and breathing shakily. He was paler than he should have been. She glanced around and saw a flickering door in front of them. But it was there. And she pulled Jon forwards. 

"Come on." Her anger almost surprised her. 

She still didn't let go of Jon as they tripped and swayed to the door. It didn't move, and when she opened it, it led out onto what appeared to be a street corner. Laughter echoed through the halls as they stepped through the threshold, the door disappearing behind them. 

Immediately she let go of Jon. 

For a moment it was silent, Sasha feeling something in her pocket and pulling out her phone. Hadn't she dropped it? She opened it to a message from Tim asking for a time check. 

She glanced at the time and frowned. 

Thirty minutes. Only thirty minutes. 

"My, my, that counts twice in one month. Dear Archivist, please tell me you walked into her web on purpose, if I knew how much you seemed to enjoy the thrill I wouldn’t be so quick to gift you such a free pleasure."

Sasha didn't have the willpower at the moment to worry about Micheal leaning against the wall and sneering at Jon. She needed a minute. Breathing through her nose as she prayed for her heart to relax. Jon responded to Michael's words with some barked reply. She wasn't listening, instead focusing on not breaking down and crying on the street corner. 

A few minutes went by, the wind filtering through her hair as she finally took the time to turn to the two behind her. 

She wasn't entirely all that sure on what Micheal said but Jon looked livid and Micheal looked overjoyed. 

"Shut it!" She hollered over the two of them, her voice not nearly as strong as she had hoped. Instead it sounded a level above a pathetic whimper. "Micheal. Thank you for getting us out, Jon, come on we are leaving."

She didn't turn around to see if he was following her, but it wasn't long till he was beside her. A new type of silence taking over. 

Sasha wasn't even sure if angry was the correct term. She thought over her words carefully before speaking, keeping them flat and almost monotone. 

"I don't know what's worse. The fact that we almost died from something neither of us could see, or the fact that you came to the conclusion I was going to kill you. Both are pathetic enough."

"I didn't-"

"Oh don't even think about taking your words back now." She wasn't making much progress on keeping her tone even. "Where did that even come from?! Logically, what do I benefit from killing you? We've already come to the conclusion that your job isn't the 'promotion' we all thought it would be."

His words were quiet. Ashamed "Gertrude Robinson was killed in cold blood." 

Right. She had had a suspicion that that had been bothering him. It made her let out a small crude laugh. 

"And here I thought it was because I had befriended what you call a monster."

"I just don't want to end up like her, you knew her! I was just-"

"Just what, Jon?" She stopped in front of him, anger and fear spilling through her words, unable to be held back any longer. "You are one of the most intensely skeptical people I've ever met, I've never heard you this paranoid before. Do you even have any evidence? Where's your proof? You criticize every single statement you read because they never have the proof you want, now you are going off of nothing and suspecting everything!"

"Gertrude Robinson is my proof." He shot back. Like a cornered dog she thought, shaking her head. 

"She's proof that someone was out to get her. I met her! I'm not all that surprised someone came after her and honestly neither should you! Christ Jon we were attacked by worms and now this, obviously there are things out there able and willing to kill. Why the hell suspect me?"

But it wasn't just her. Tim had mentioned that he thought he had seen someone outside his house, he blew it off but now she wasn't so sure. Jon suspected all of them, no doubt. 

Sasha shook her head, rubbing away the pathetic tears that begged to fall. She was so tired. Sick of things trying to kill her. Sick of feeling like she was on the witness stand. Sick of it all. 

"Jon I've always felt I understood where you were coming from. But I don't understand this. I don't understand shutting everyone out because of some suspicion. I didn't almost just die only for you to label it as some failed attempt on my end. I'm your friend, sure I trust people a little more often than you do but that doesn't mean I'm plotting behind your back." The anger fell away as she scowled at nothing. "I guess I can't force you to trust me." She shook her head and started forwards again. 

"Sasha, please don't- I- I don't, if you tell the others- listen I know I'm hard sometimes but I know something up I can feel it."

"I won't tell anyone."

"Wh-what?" 

"I trust you. Shocking right? Well I do, and if you genuinely think you are in danger then-" Sasha shook her head. "Well I've believed worse with less so, sure, let's go with that. But I'm not willing to believe it's someone on our team ok? Leave them alone." Sasha stopped and turned. Jon was staring at her with the most relieved expression. 

"You're serious?"

"Accuse me of killing again and this will be a drastically different conversation. Bloody hell Jon, I can't with you sometimes."

Chapters:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

[coldflasher]

currently experiencing a resurgence of one of my intermittently dormant special interests: doctor who, specifically with regard to classic doctor who, specifically the missing episodes, the mere thought of which makes my eye twitch

for those who are unaware, due to cost-saving purposes, back in the 1960s, when reruns were almost (perhaps completely) unheard of as a concept, and television programmes were just a thing that aired live and if you didn't happen to see it, or wanted to watch it again, you were shit out of luck, the BBC had a policy of reusing the tapes that they filmed their shows on. well, why wouldn't you? tapes were expensive, storing them took up space, and as mentioned, it was never really considered that anyone might want to watch an episode of something for a second time. i have read (and don't take this as gospel bc i haven't fact-checked it yet) that on the rare occasion they wanted to air something again, they would hire all the actors back and just RE-FILM THE EXACT SAME PROGRAMME AND AIR A NEW VERSION OF IT INSTEAD OF JUST SAVING A COPY OF THE THING FOR LATER, which is INSANE because this was largely a cost-saving exercise and in what UNIVERSE is re-filming an ENTIRE THING cheaper than just NOT WIPING THE TAPE. (again. i haven't fact-checked this so maybe it's a lie. insane if true. will look into it).

but as a result, once they had broadcast an episode of doctor who, and many other shows made in this era, the bbc would literally just move onto the next thing and record something else over the top of it. and so a large number of episodes of one of the most successful and enduring sci-fi shows of all time was taped over with like, a random episode of call the midwife or whatever (im being tongue in cheek, i don't think call the midwife existed in 1963)

but all was not lost! literally! because the bbc did MAKE copies of a number of episodes and sent them to other countries to be aired! where they were safe from bbc nonsense! huzzah!

except again, reruns weren't a thing, and there was no need to keep the tapes after they'd shown them, so some of these countries, after airing the episodes, were very polite and went "hey, do you want these back, or?" and the bbc, in their infinite wisdom, were like "nah, bin 'em, i reckon".

SO THE TELEVISION STATIONS IN OTHER COUNTRIES ALSO TAPED OVER THEM. OR THREW THEM AWAY OR DESTROYED THEM IN SOME OTHER CAPACITY. SCREEEEEEAM

now THANKFULLY this didn't happen to every single episode. some countries kept them and did return them at a later date when the bbc had stopped fucking taping over everything and gone "oh shit, maybe we should have kept those actually." some episodes ended up with private collectors. some ended up at car boot sales. some ended up in the back of a storage cupboard for the bbc to find 20 years later THEN THEY THREW THOSE IN THE FUCKING BIN AS WELL (though this did happen again on another occasion further in the future when people had finally realized what a travesty the whole thing was and actually kept them, thank god).

over the years many of the serials in question have been found, at least in part, or pieced together as animations or painstaking reconstructions using the audio from the episodes (thanks to some enterprising fans back in the day, we do at the very least have audio of varying quality for most if not all of the missing episodes, so there's that). but there are still i think around 97 episodes that are either lost forever or potentially unaccounted for, being hoarded by private collectors who don't wish to share them, or just shoved in storage somewhere where somebody doesn't know what they are. and every now and then i remember the whole fiasco and just start slowly losing my mind over the combination of carelessness, lack of foresight, ignorance, and sheer terrible luck that has resulted in SO MUCH LOST MEDIA

[starlightnovasboots]

im sorry but this wil be a long long one...

info i gathered about the anpanman pilots

WARNING: most of this info came from some yt coments i found so take it all with a HUGE grain of salt

lets start with some actual relyable sources:

the credits say that the pilots where dirercted by some tetsuo yasumi guy and animated by "studio Märchen" who worked on "nippon mukashi banashi" wich many pepole tough this was from but it wasnt as we soon wil see.

as for what Yanase himself said about it in an intervew in the late 2000s he had very little involvment and it was made inpedenently by forbel kan.

it was aparently shown on places such as libraries and street shows in 16 min tapes (whatever those are)

the frist one was released in 1984 and the second one in 1987 (wich is odd since is the year the TMS anime started production)

aparently there where plans to adapt "anpanman and gorilaman" in a third episode but it never came to be (probably bc TMS was already working on soreike anpanman) and its unknown how far it got into production

strangely the vas arent credited anywhere in the short and since the japanese audio is lost its a total mistery. i beleve theres a chançe anpanman could have been voiced by toshie kusunoki who voiced him in the musical Märchen anpanman/ringing bell records but that was like almost a decade before but i stil beleve in the posibilty.

if you read it all from an unofical anpanman historian to an anpanman purist thank you!

*Cracks knuckles.* I have been studying Pilot Anpanman stuff for over 2 (almost 3?) years now and feel like I've been called to fulfill a prophecy, so thank you. To start, a decent chunk of what you said is proven correct. Yes, the Pilot episodes were directed by Tetsuo Yasumi and animated by Studio Marchen, whilst being made by Forbel Kan. Yes, these tapes were played in places like the mall, library, you name it. Anywhere that had a small overhead TV with public access was fair game to these tapes. The reason these had aired as they did was because they were being used as audience "test samples" i.e. seeing how the consumer would react to an initial product. It's a market strategy. At this time, animating the Anpanman comic and anything else was still merely a test idea. There were plans for the third tape you mentioned, but it didn't come to fruition in Japan because they were trying to aim for a new angle plus the perception and understanding was that Anpanman needed upgrades.

The initial episode 3 idea was scrapped, but another one was made in its place. Around the time Soreike! Anpanman came out, there were still tapes for libraries and malls and other places still being made for spaces that didn't have cable TV or could otherwise broadcast TV, which eventually stopped after public TVs gained better access to cable TV and could therefore show Soreike! Anpanman.

Unfortunately, however, most of those tapes are lost media and the Japanese versions even moreso.

(These are even harder to find considering that most were just made to advertise, not to broadcast).

Japan wasn't the only country that Pilot Anpanman had any relevance. Other official dubs existed in greek, urdu, arabic, and other languages. Some of the dubs for that exist on Youtube for the first episode, even. There were (at one point) bootlegged/fake episodes being made in other dubs that were very poorly representative of Pilot Anpanman content as well and look nor sound nothing like it. As far as I know, they're not sold around anymore.

Occasionally, a Japanese auction site will auction off a random episode tape here and there that is legitimate but expensive. I've had a go at getting them numerous times, but to no avail. It's hard to find the original pieces of media that started this odd appreciation people are starting to have again and even harder with other dubs and bootlegs.

[musicandteddybears]

WELP. HERE WE ARE. THE FINALE OF EPIC THE MUSICAL. i was not ready. i thought i could handle it. my heart is in pieces and i need duct tape to fix it so imma have to go watch funny stuff. ow.

song 36 Penelope, you a smart and classy lady. "i said i'd pick someone when i finished the shroud, but at night i pick it apart." nice. and then she sees the storm, and is like "WELP. TIME TO START PUTTING THINGS IN PLACE, THAT'S CLEARLY A SIGN." the trick with the bow is good. "yo, if you can string the bow and shoot all these axes, then you get the throne and me." song 37 oooh, i knew this was gonna be creepy and i was right. "hold them down while we grow older, while the prince grows bolder" and then just basically saying "okay so we kill the prince, then assault the wife and if anyone asks what happens, well that's between us and the ocean." and then that 'shk' sound at the end. nice touch. you can feel the sleaze and entitlement coming off that song. well done. song 38 GUESS WHO'S BACK BITCHES! DADDY'S HOME AND READY TO KICK SOME ASS! AND BOY DOES HE GO TOWN ON THEM. HE'S HAD ENOUGH. the suitors freaking out is great. "We know these halls, the odds can be tilted." "You don't think I know my own palace? I built it."

bro. you really think that because you've squatted there for 20 years, you know everything? HOMEBOY BUILT THAT PLACE, HE KNOWS MORE THAN YOU EVER WILL. "heeeeey you killed our leader, we're totes not a threat anymore, maybe we can have peace?" "No." Telemachus coming in with a sword strike! Go boy go! unfortunately he's outnumbered, but that's alright, Daddy's got your back. And then the suitor calling for mercy? HA. fuck that shit. "My mercy has long since drowned, it died to bring me home." ooogh. you can feel the threat. especially when he points out that they planned to rape his wife and kill his son, well, now they gotta die. a fitting end to those assholes. song 39 father and son reunion! oh my heart.

All my life, I'd have died to meet you Thought about your name so much, it hurts For twenty years, I've dreamt of how I'd greet you Oh, and now you're here, I can't find the words

aaaaaaaaaah

Oh, my son, look how much you've grown Oh, my boy, sweetest joy I've known Twenty years ago I held you in my arms How time has flown, oh

AAAAAAAAAAH I'M FINE I SWEAR AAAAAAAAAAA "go tell your mom i'm home, i'll be there in a moment." "sure thing dad!" that was very touching and sweet. and then. "Show yourself I know you're watching me, show yourself" I JUST caught that callback to when they first met. I can't help but feel like I led you astray What if there's a world where we don't have to live this way? oh athena. If that world exists, it's far away from here It's one I'll have to miss, for it's far beyond my years

oh odyseuss. god, the parallels, and then the reverse of it, from when odyseuss first was "okay but what if mercy and kindness were an option" and athena saying "uh no. be ruthless." to "well what about empathy after all?" "that's beyond me now." and then. Father? She's waiting for you song 40 okay, i'd seen people flipping over this on my dashboard, and didn't quite get it, but knew it was romantic at least. now? OHOHOHOHO. NOW I GET IT. BOY DO I GET NOW. Odyseuss just laying out all his faults, all the stuff he's done, and basically saying "i'm not who i used to be, i'm not the one you loved." and Penelope going "well what'd you do?" "so much murder, you don't even know, but it was to get back to you." I am not the man you knew I know that you've been waiting, waiting Our girl is having NONE OF THAT BULLSHIT.

"DO ME A FAVOR THEN, GET RID OF THE WEDDING BED"

"I BUILT THAT FROM THE TREE WHERE WE MET"

"ONLY MY HUSBAND KNEW THAT SO THAT MAKES HIM YOU!"

it's fine. it's fine. really. just proof of love and devotion.

I will fall in love with you over and over again I don't care how, where, or when No matter how long it's been, you're mine Don't tell me you're not the same person You're always my husband and I've been waiting, waiting

THAT IS DEVOTION, PEOPLE. THAT IS LOVE. HE DIDN'T CHEAT, HE DIDN'T GIVE UP. SHE WAITED, AND DIDN'T GIVE UP EITHER. MAD RESPECT. 20 FUCKING YEARS. THAT'S LIFE GOALS. "How long has it been?" "20 years." "I love you." EXCUSE ME, I HAVE TO GO CRY NOW. ;O;

that was a hell of a ride. worth it. but ohhhh. thanks for following along with me on this journey.

[emyluwinter]

Lilia Dream

A bunch of my thoughts and a little theory. You know, I was haunted by the fact that Idia or Sebek in their "happy dreams" had the most ordinary life, the one that suited and pleased them. (And she also gave a lot of reasons for fans of Malleyuu and some kind of "divorce" from which I still laugh. Yuu doesn't intersect so closely with these characters, what kind of divorce are you talking about. They shouldn't be in the dreams of these two guys???)

and so…..

WHY THE HELL DOES LILIA HAVE SUCH A DREAM?! This is definitely a period of wars. because we see soldiers. We see Lilia in his full general's outfit. His attitude and manner of speech. His relation to others.

Malleus does not directly control sleep, he only WATCHES them. Lillia subconscious or self-consciousness created such a dream.

And I had a few thoughts on this.

Someone mentioned that this may be a dream related to the day in which Lilia finds Silver in the cradle

For me, this is not a very suitable theory because it does not fit with the fact that Vanruge should have already been near Malleus. As a mentor or bodyguard, or an informal "guardian". So the war should have been over by now.

Because from a logical point of view, if there is an experienced and strongest fairy military general, then you will send him to the front to end the war or conflict faster than leaving him to sit with a baby.

It may be a dream in which the war finally ended or it did not exist at all. And they can tell us that an egg with a Malleus inside appeared. (Yes, for those who do not know, the Dragonia was most likely born from an egg) I will explain further why this particular detail.

This is a more appropriate development in my opinion.

Think about it, my dear, Lilia spent a lot of time in the war or conflicts between humans and faeries. We don't know how many of his relatives or friends he lost. Also how much these events affected his life in general.

His happy dream may be that all that nightmare, horror and bloodshed is simple….didn't exist. Maybe it was a brief skirmish between different people and faeries that they need to control.

Or maybe it was the last day of the war when all this horror ended. The happiest thing that can happen is to no longer experience the events that haunted Vanruzh for who knows how long.

And from the palace from the royal family came the news of the appearance of the egg. The heir of the Draconia that has not yet been born/hatched.

Because - a new life, a peaceful life and a new beginning.

A harbinger that after dark times full of conflicts, losses, battles, the time of peace and tranquility is finally coming. Which everyone craves so passionately.

Perhaps this is another reason for the "idolization" of Malleus. His birth was associated with the onset of that period that everyone was so anxiously waiting for, which means his reign will be peaceful, bright and joyful.

Lilia himself has repeatedly mentioned that he wants a bright future for the Thorn Valley.

What if in his dream Malleus' parents were still alive and Malefecia did not need to fulfill the duties of the monarch until Malleus was ready to ascend the throne? That would also be a happy note in this dream of Vanrouge. Malleus with his family/parents, whom Lilia probably knew or even grew up side by side.

Their efforts and views would settle the conflict more quickly than it was in reality. And there would have been much fewer victims than there actually were.

If we are really shown the joyful faces of the spouses of Draconia who are eager to see their child as soon as possible, we can safely go for blue duct tape to glue our broken hearts.

+to the shock of Malleus It would be a good detail for the plot!!

After all, Tsunotaro has never seen them in person. And Lilia could remember them at least a little or pieces of certain events. Perhaps we could be shown hints of Silver's family (maybe she was the royal family that waged wars with the fae)

And this would be a good parralel. Silver's loving family that is fascinated by their little newborn prince. And the elegant restrained Malleus family, which envelops the little "dragon heir" with care and transfer of experience for the throne. Maybe the conclusion of peace will also be stipulated..

Having little information, I can only assume that we can be told about Lilia dream in a completely different way, so I can only build theories about what might happen next.

[halimpark7]

I'm not ok w frazzle. It makes people Immune to suffering. It makes you into a zombie. People are suffering from beatings. It causes people in your soul tribe to be abused. You're spiritually stealing their hormones.

(my dad had a class in college where people could volunteer to be spanked before class, idk why. Anyway my dad always volunteered. My dad was really sparkly. You want to shine, have someone jazz hands the shit out of you) better than frazzle and you don't have to pay for it spiritually. Find a mean bitch who loves you and spank her.

You're going to have to pay for everything you've ever done to the degree you've caused harm. Find everything in a mutually beneficial way.

Method Acting steals from real life people who were more abused than you. It's channeling. You're stealing their life energy, their nervousness, their life or death anxiety, or their life story. You're just acting.

Causing them to be meth/crack addicts. Reliving their trauma.

They're supposed to, as well live the high life, but you're all so fucking greedy that you always have to take take take. You steal from all your soulmates.

You being mean to a nice person is your demons being jealous of their God energy. It's stealing their light, eating their motivation from God. It's trying to kill that piece of them so you can wear it for yourself. Crazy narcissists do this all the time. (Every bully ever) Will rip your proverbial hair and tape it to their personality. They're crazy.

You're secretly dumb. Secretly jealous, secretly something devious. Everyone is.*shrugs*

Everyone is selling something, don't be judgemental of whores. We all sell something we never wanted to. First integrity. And when we were young "control" to our dumb parents.

We are guardians of souls around us. Not dictators, tyrants, slave owners. People are themselves. Let them be who they are. Controlling them is narcissistic. Narcissism is a possession.

It feels good to lay back and have someone else suffer and work. It feels way better to be the farm owner than the cotton picker. Way better to be the executioner than the criminal.

We were all here before. Those desires run through all of us. Do "you" in the most healing way possible.

Want to kill people? Find a kinky freak and have murder her vagina sex. (Thanks Mike, for this idea)

Someone who loves you and who you love that you want to be human towards.

Or be a prison executioner. Everything you spiritually are inclined to is a part of you or your past life to transform and evolve.

Want to feel powerful as a woman, rape your husband. (Consensually)

There's always a way to get your needs met that helps you calm the fuck down.

I'm not going to hell and I don't want you to either. Your kids need to learn consequences and compassion for the suffering of others. You're part responsible.

Evil people don't feel ok unless they feel the suffering of good people. They need to squeeze God out of things just like the fallen angels torture humanity to feel the energy of what it's like to be close to God.

If you have an evil kid, hurt for them, make them feel guilty with your pain, so they don't kill the lives of others. If you're evil, get your wife to beat you up. Beating smaller things is demonic. Having them torture you makes you compassionate to suffering and empowers them. And it hurts.

Let me know how this goes. Let's all make a better world together.

Don't hate prostitutes. Everything exists in society bc people want it to be here. We all have needs. We are all monsters somewhere.

I truly believe no one is all that good of a person, unless your a "saint".

We just have social shame that prevents us from going too far.

Look at the Holocaust. So many "good" people thinking they were doing the right thing. People love being bullies. It makes us feel powerful.

Imagine someone you didn't really like, needing a place to crash forever, really want to help them? They don't want to sleep w you anymore?? Out you go. Bye.

Whoops. Human nature is good but also really bad. Work on where you suck. Night.

[jlf23tumble]

Oh I love that you responded! I was just enjoying a glass of wine and blathering into the ether. I found you because I wanted to understand the tragedy that was 1D Day without having watch seven hours of blasphemy and Google led me to your recaps! Honesty they are A GEM. I've read all your recaps now (except the XF ones) and yes, please bring them back!

The content I originally encountered was on TikTok which was completely edited and set to music (and sometimes very, very weird) but interesting enough to send me to find real answers. I'm an old, old millennial so we had LexusNexus and not Wikipedia, and were taught to question everything and honestly the proof is so much more interesting than the manipulated data. I think that the most compelling evidence is some of the stuff people gloss over, like the aforementioned lip-licking (it's definitely more obvious when giffed but does exist in video) because it went on for years and also why would you do this (like are most straight boys into subtle homoerotic flirting?), also how agitated they could make each other while miming sex acts (all the boys made sex jokes at each other but ONLY H and L got turned on by them), the touches they didn't mean to have caught on camera (the infamous arm caress, but also Louis rubbing Harry's arm with his finger while exiting a bus, and some serious waist squeezing, back/neck rubbing). And their very couple-y way of communicating without speaking, and all the fond, especially Harry's moony heart eyes in the early days (but also all the way into 2015). Also some very curious jealousy and possessiveness. The tweets and sexual innuendos and touchiness during interviews doesn't interest me, it feels very teenage boy humor and for fan service. But the behavior of the other three boys was very, very suspicious.  

I'm obsessed with all the drama and inconsistencies. Like why didn't Louis deny the rumors when given the chance on 1D Day or the Four Hangout (it's telling that all the denials he did in those days were in pre-taped interviews or on Twitter and not live - I have theories about the difference once 1D ended/Freddie was born). Also this video of Louis asking Liam to interfere when Harry was singing to him during a concert. (I have no straight explanation for this. If Larry wasn't real and it was all an act, why couldn't Louis get Harry to stop on his own?)

I could go on and on (again, sorry!) and I definitely have some favorite interviews (the 2012 RTE Late Late Show episode is a goldmine) and more thoughts! If you decide to recap, I have some suggestions. Going to work through some of your fic recommendations now that I'm so invested. 

THIS ORIGIN STORY, thanks, Google! Check out those XF recaps, that was some fun shit, then come yell at me here or in the DMs, I need moreeeeeeeeeeee! I would love any/all suggestions for recaps, tbh, happy to do the 2012 Late Late Show ep if you want it, even now, because a) any of those old interviews are fun, and b) the full piece ALWAYS reveals so much more than what's giffed.

[tma-entity-song-poll]

Battle of the Fear Bands!

B5R4: The Lonely

Alone Again (Naturally):

“A man becomes so lonely his only wish is to commit suicide”

The Bed Song:

“The song tells the story of a couple in snapshots over the course of their lives. They're close and affectionate in their youth, but a gulf between them forms and gets wider with every verse. The song ends with the two of them laying in their graves, having not touched each other in decades.”

Lyrics below the line!

Alone Again (Naturally):

In a little while from now If I'm not feeling any less sour I promise myself to treat myself And visit a nearby tower And climbing to the top Will throw myself off In an effort to Make it clear to whoever Wants to know what it's like when you're shattered

Left standing in the lurch at a church Were people saying, My God, that's tough She stood him up No point in us remaining We may as well go home As I did on my own Alone again, naturally

To think that only yesterday I was cheerful, bright and gay Looking forward to who wouldn't do The role I was about to play But as if to knock me down Reality came around And without so much as a mere touch Cut me into little pieces

Leaving me to doubt Talk about, God in His mercy Oh, if he really does exist Why did he desert me In my hour of need I truly am indeed Alone again, naturally

It seems to me that There are more hearts broken in the world That can't be mended Left unattended What do we do What do we do

Alone again, naturally

Looking back over the years And whatever else that appears I remember I cried when my father died Never wishing to hide the tears And at sixty-five years old My mother, God rest her soul Couldn't understand why the only man She had ever loved had been taken Leaving her to start With a heart so badly broken Despite encouragement from me No words were ever spoken And when she passed away I cried and cried all day Alone again, naturally Alone again, naturally

The Bed Song:

Exhibit A We are friends in a sleeping bag splitting the heat We have one filthy pillow to share and your lips are in my hair Someone upstairs has a rat that we laughed at And people are drinking And singing bad Scarborough Fair on a ukulele tear

Exhibit B Well, we found an apartment It’s not much to look at A futon on a floor Torn-off desktop for a door All the decor's made of milk crates and duct tape And if we have sex They can hear us through the floor But we don’t do that anymore

And I lay there wondering, what is the matter? Is this a matter of worse or of better? You took the blanket, so I took the bedsheet But I would have held you if you'd only

Let me

Exhibit C Look how quaint And how quiet and private Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town It's the nicest flat around You picked a mattress and had it delivered And I walked upstairs And the sight of it made my heart pound And I wrapped my arms around me

And I stood there wondering, what is the matter? Is this a matter of worse or of better? You walked right past me and straightened the covers But I would still love you if you wanted a lover And you said All the money in the world Won't buy a bed so big and wide To guarantee that you won't accidentally touch me In the night

Exhibit D Now we're both mostly paralyzed Don't know how long we've been lying here in fear Too afraid to even feel I find my glasses and you turn the light out Roll off on your side Like you've rolled away for years Holding back those king-size tears

And I still don't ask you, what is the matter? Is this a matter of worse or of better? You take the heart failure I'll take the cancer I've long stopped wondering why you don't answer

Exhibit E You can certainly see how fulfilling a life From the cost and size of stone of our final resting home We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree You and me lying the only way we know Side by side and still and cold

And I finally ask you, what was the matter? Was it a matter of worse or of better? You stretch your arms out and finally face me You say I would have told you

If you'd only asked me If you'd only asked me If you'd only asked me

[hannahssimblr]

Chapter Two

On the first freezing day of Autumn, I zip my coat all the way up to the top and shiver as I exit the apartment building, a huge, converted Georgian house that opens onto Fitzwilliam Square. My hands are stiff as I try to wrangle my bicycle loose from the iron railings out front, my condensed breath floating over my face to warm up my nose and cheeks. I swear under my breath as the key gets stuck, again, and then stand there jangling it madly for a minute before it releases and the heavy chain pools onto the concrete at my feet. 

I’ve learned quickly that the trick to owning a bicycle in Dublin city is to get the cheapest bike you can find and then make it look even cheaper. Shane and I spent an evening destroying it in the bin yard a couple of weeks ago, stamping the pedals until pieces broke off, using spray paint in lurid colours to obscure the brand name and shiny red coat on the metal work. We wound duct tape around the saddle and the handlebars, which doubled as an anti-theft method, happily enough. It was a cathartic experience. Claire had come along with a sticker book and helpfully dotted the body with flowers and hearts and rainbows too, insisting that all thieves are men, and none of them will want a girl’s bike. I then went to the nearest bike shop and bought two locks, the most hard wearing and expensive ones they had, because nobody is going to pick two massive locks for the pathetic reward of a dinged up bicycle covered in stickers. 

“It’s a rite of passage to have a bike stolen in the first month.” Shane had said with some sympathy after I cried at the college gates having discovered my brand new bike gone, only an easily sawed through lock pathetically coiled around the stand left as any evidence that it existed. “Sure, bits off my bike get robbed all the time. I had to cycle home from town without a saddle the other week. We’ll get you another one, I know a guy who deals them out of his ma’s garage.”

“Isn’t that kind of like contributing to the negative cycle?” I whimpered. “I bet all those bikes are stolen too.”

“Yeah probably, but, ah, sure. They’re only sixty quid.” 

That’s how I ended up with this ‘new’ bike, and luckily, nobody has stolen its saddle yet. We made sure that it’d be so inconvenient that even the most hard-up, desperate thief wouldn’t come near any part of it, but as a payoff it’s so uncomfortable. It squeaks, the back brake doesn’t work and sometimes when I go too fast I feel as though I’m going to slide off it and bash my most private areas onto the crossbar, but it gets me where I need to go. In the cold, early morning in the mist and smell of turf I throw my leg over it and manoeuvre it out onto the road, my bag and drawing tube strapped across me, and zip up towards Baggot Street, then skirt around Stephen’s Green, the new, cold wind throwing icy daggers at my face as I weave in and out of traffic, eluding busses and taxis and pedestrians who keep crossing the road before it’s their turn. Rust coloured leaves drop onto the pavement before my wheels as I pass the flats along Kevin Street, children in tiny uniforms walking to school hand in hand with their parents. 

“Use your arms!” A taxi driver screams at me as I swerve to the right ahead of him, and I ignore him, already used to men screaming at me on these streets, whether it’s because they think I’m cycling them wrong or because they have an opinion about my body that they’d like to share. 

Dublin isn’t awful, but it’s harsh in ways I’m still unused to. When I visited it I saw it as more beautiful than it really is, but back then I only saw the shops, the parks, the huge Georgian houses, and now I see the back alleys too and the places that don’t feel all that wonderful. I’ve seen the yellow pallor of the people at the back of the bus, the men in alleyways who dare you to look in and see them so they can shout at you for doing it, women climbing into sleeping bags in the sheltered doorways of department stores for the night, battered paper cups set out hopefully in front of them as they curl up to sleep on the cold pavement. 

I get shouted at a lot here too. By bus drivers, for not knowing how to use my Leap card properly, and by the people on said busses for standing or sitting in the wrong places, by taxi men for crossing the road at the wrong time, by screechy women in windows for throwing my chewing gum in the wrong bins. I apologise a lot more than I ever have now, which is really saying something. 

I swerve down a bumpy, cobblestone side street and through the gates of NCAD, taking the time to chain my bike onto the same rack where its predecessor was nicked from, giving the locks a hard, intentional look as if I could intimidate them into staying put. Then I hurry inside and up the stairs, the central heating blasting over me so intensely that by the time I stumble into the studio I feel like a piece of ham wrapped in cling film. I drop my bag and drawing tube onto the floorboards by one of the drawing tables and start ripping my outerwear off in a frenzy. 

Prev // Next

[lycanlovingvampyre]

MAG 157 Relisten

Activity on my first listen: baking something in the kitchen, most likely with apples...

JON: "Martin has left it here to let me know that whatever the situation is with Peter Lukas, it is entering its final act, and he needs my help." Jon does not consider the option of Martin leaving the tape to say goodbye. The accompanying statement would say otherwise because it kind of says the Extinction does not exist in the ways they thought after all. But at this point Jon doesn't know/Know the content of the statement yet.

JON: "Alternatively, Peter may have left here to… goad me into action? Or just to gloat, to highlight my helplessness at everything." Or to tell Jon to stay away because Martin has made his choice. Still, this only works without the knowledge of the statement.

Just a small bit on the pronunciation of Klanxbüll, the Umlaut is a bitch of course, so I’m leaving that out. But I'm putting this in because of the double L. These usually mean the vowel before them is short (I say usually because there a short vowels without a double letter afterwards...). It should be like "bull", not like "cool". Which is funny that Jonny would pronounce it like "cool" because I think this works very similar in English? He's always been very good in German pronunciation.

"Combined with its extremely disturbing symptoms, which caused the skin and muscles to become loose and malleable until they sloughed completely off the body, leaving only a skeleton and organs…" Urgh this sounds horrible... Corruption/Flesh cooperation!

"Thin trails of blood and skin crisscrossed to the streets, and the walls and windows of nearby buildings were coated in a fine sheen of discarded gore." Not gonna lie, body horror has never done much to me (when it's not about eyes... and feet, actually...) but this is different... It sounds so alienating, probably because it has a supernatural cause and is not just an axe murderer going berserk. It's like Alex said, you can kick those. How would you kick the darkness for example? (Though I think Alex also referred to the Corruption when he was talking about kicking the Fears and this one is the Corruption...)

"It didn’t take me long to find my first victim, wrapped around a lamppost. He had clearly tried to lean on it for support in his distress, but his flesh had begun to spread and fuse over it in thick, ropey tendrils. His bones were almost bare to the elements. But it was then that I saw the thing that, to my mind, is perhaps the worst of it. His heart was exposed. It was beating fast, so fast, despite the awful green decay that seemed to be eating at it." Ahhh, you know what this reminds me of! Annihilation again! (Already talked about that one in MAG 149, also a supposed Extinction statement.) The once-a-person fused with the wall (I think that was that dude the previous team cut open... Actually you know what, that one was also so alienating and crazy, it made me nauseous! That is very rare in horror movies... Annihilation was just awesome...)

"an old man whose bright eyes still stared out of his skull, watching the television, though the rest of him lay pooled on the floor." Hmm, a comment on the generation now almost living in front of the TV despite having preached not to watch TV so much 25 years ago...?

I don't recall us ever finding out who left the tape with this statement for Jon... Definitely not Peter, I'd say, that leaves Martin or a itsy bitsy Spider. And after all, Jon needed to go after Martin.

JON: "Really? Where’s all her stuff?" Lol, this "gotcha!" tone...

GEORGIE: "Bedroom. Why?" JON: "No, I just…" [TELLTALE STATIC CRACKLING OF THE EYE SOUNDS AS JOHN FITS THE PIECES TOGETHER.] JON: "Oh. Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t – I didn’t realize you were to-together." GEORGIE: "That’s ‘cause it’s none of your business. Now leave." Ah yes, the Eye never disappoints to go after personal information.

MELANIE: "It’s – it’s been good for me though I feel alright. I’m – I’m not scared anymore." MMMMHHMMM!!

Also quality content of the Admiral!

JON: "I don’t have time for this. What is at the cen–" [A SOUND LIKE A BLADE BEING DRAWN AS THE ARCHIVIST BEGINS CHOKING. A SHARP, UNSETTLING TONE BEGINS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.] HELEN: "No. We’re not playing your game. Now don’t forget how sharp I can be, Archivist. Perhaps here, now, you’re powerful enough to learn what you want from me, but if you try, I promise you I will resist. And only one of us is going to survive the attempt." Helen really shows her true colors here. First she's amused of how hopeless and desperate Jon is but then she switches to actually flat out antagonizing him. Helen does sometimes call him Archivist, but here right now it’s not a coincident.

JON: "Just tell me what’s going on. Please." HELEN: (gleefully) "Bad things, Archivist. Really bad things." Ah, this is such a good prelude to the finale!

@a-mag-a-day

[nonbinary-octopus]

recently, I purchased a small bluetooth mouse to assist me in my in-bed reading times. You see, I like to lie down and position my phone in a comfortable spot for reading, held in place by my blankets and sheets.

The only trouble is that this position necessitates a hand by the phone to scroll, but sometimes I would want to have my hands under the blankets, for warmth or just because the position out of the blankets was getting uncomfortable on my joints.

My wife saw a short video of someone using a bluetooth scrolling ring, and mentioned it to me. I desired it immediately and set out to purchase it. Unfortunately, however, I could not find the sort of ring my wife had seen; all I could find were rings intended to scroll through tiktok, and though I purchased one and tried it, it turned out to scroll more than a screen's height when I pressed the buttons, and was thus useless.

So I figured I'd try the next best thing, a very small mouse with a scroll wheel. I purchased the smallest bluetooth mouse I could find, connected it to my phone, and voila! I could scroll. Except, the cursor was visible. And if I shifted the mouse at all in my reading, of course the cursor would move as well. I would position it out of the way near the bottom of the screen, and it would gradually wander back up and be in the way again. I ended up sticking a bandaid over the sensor, which kept it in place.

Unfortunately, each time I connected the mouse to my phone, the cursor started in the center of the screen, so I would have to reposition it each time, and I didn't want to keep putting on and removing the bandaid, especially as the couple times I had done so already had caused it to no longer lie quite flat, and it was an irritating texture to touch.

So I set the mouse aside for a while.

Yesterday, I thought I would try it again, and with a new solution. I crafted a paper cuff that would slide up over the mouse, hiding the motion sensor so that it would stay still

This worked for a couple minutes. But it didn't fit snugly and kept shifting, and more importantly, I had to put it on after turning the mouse on and positioning it, and the mouse would respond to this by moving the cursor down. This might not sound like too much of a problem, but actually, if the cursor goes too far down, scrolling stops working because the mouse is no longer on the active window.

So I added another piece:

a thin strip formed into a loop, taped onto the base of the mouse such that I could fold it back and expose the sensor, and then fold it back into place rather than sliding, and then slide the cuff on. Additionally, the loop fit like a ring to hold the mouse without needing to grip it.

This worked very well! I used it for several hours with only minor issues.

However, those minor issues did exist, and I wished to improve the model further to correct them. Firstly, the cursor did still shift somewhat. This was due in part to the cuff being somewhat loose, and in part due to the paper covering the sensor also being the ring, so when I shifted my grip, it might shift the cover.

Secondly, it turns out that if I hold a mouse in one hand under my cozy blankets for long enough, my hand starts to get Very Tired of the texture of the plastic, and of the bits of tape I was touching—especially the edges. Touching the paper was still fine, however. So now I have version 3 of the mouse sheath:

First: a strip of paper, taped at the base of the mouse and coming up to cover the sensor. Second, a sheath which covers the entire mouse, not just a portion of it. It has a cutout for the scroll wheel. As a bonus, the first strip sticks out of the top, for easier removal from the sheath. Third, a loop taped onto the back of the sheath to stick my finger through. It is very carefully taped such that I shouldn't be touching tape on the inside of the ring, though there is some near it.

I shall be testing this version shortly, and will report back on its usefulness.

[misscammiedawn]

50 Days of HypnoKink - Day 29: Safe Spaces

Alignment: 105% Bottom Only --- I'm not comfortable doing this one for others

By now we're kinda out of "this is hot" and I'm just writing about things I think are cool. This one may be one to skip if you're following this for scene ideas and stories of things I've done with trance.

A lot of inductions, especially with older files, have you imagine a safe space. A relaxing and gentle calming place.

Therapists also do this for EMDR work which-- is uncomfortably close to hypnosis in my experience--

The idea is to turn a piece of your soul into a location of softness and tranquility and I've always found a lot of interest in that. Like a lot of folx who I get close to in the hypnosis community that I feel safe asking, I ask them to describe their place.

That is a super private thing and I will not even elude to what people have told me.

But it makes me smile. Like I get to see a piece of them.

It lets me know what they find enchanting and soothing. How they visualize safety and comfort.

Then you can ask little questions.

What do you do there?

Are there any smells to this place?

What time of day do you picture it as?

Are you alone?

Are there ambient sounds?

Though maybe phrase a little less leading? I dunno. I'm not good at guided hypnosis. I just know if you say "is there music in the air?" people will hear music because you put the idea in and if you ask "Focus on your sense of hearing, really take notice of the space. Is there anything you can notice?" then at least you're asking input.

Huh? I guess I do know my stuff. Just not performative.

Anyway!

I'll talk about my place in a bit but I wanted to say it has always smelled of coffee. Goddess and my former partner used to guide me through "refreshing the grounds" when I needed a boost.

The reason it's not a Miss Dawn special or anything is that when you're in someone's most precious imaginings it's difficult to tread lightly.

If you raise attention to how someone internally perceives themselves in that space, it could lead to dysphoric feelings. You could introduce new elements.

Like I don't mean to be all Inception or anything. But my space has been a consistent location for over 2 decades at this point. More than half my life the same space has existed in my mind. That kinda means any changes made in that area are important and stick.

Which is a lot of responsibility.

Fuck... I could only dream of having a place I call home for a single decade. Let alone 2. This space has been more a constant than my literal homes. Though I carry them with me.

I am so so off topic right now x.x

Maybe I should just talk about my experiences outright, then--

My Safe Space is... private and I have complicated feelings about it.

To date only 3 people other than therapists have been allowed to explore it or make changes and only one - my Goddess - has been allowed to be visualized within that space.

Until Goddess made that request, understanding the importance of this next sentence, I had never visualized anyone else in that space.

Sometimes animals from memories or imagination but even then with great discomfort.

99% of the time nothing that exists outside of my head is allowed in that space. It is hallowed ground in my mind.

The person who helped me build it abused me and hurt me. I don't want to talk about that. But I think it's important that I note it. A part of him is in the walls. There's an area that is sealed off with yellow security tape and I haven't been in that area since I was a teenager. Like a scar on my soul that I cannot escape. Goddess once asked to remove it. I like the reminder. I like the feeling of power I have over knowing it. Knowing I sealed it and him out of my life.

So... edited within the realm of privacy--- I just wanna describe some things:

It's built from memories and emotional connections to those memories. It's always night there and the sky is the sky I saw at a precious friend's home in North Wales back in 2005.

There's a camp fire that has taken on attributes from a certain backyard fire pit in recent years.

My safe space itself is a log cabin. I call it The Lodge. The person who knows why isn't with me anymore.

There's a hidden room behind a bookcase that leads to the "Room of Doors" which is a staple from Goddess' hypnotic files.

A recliner I picture myself trancing in when I am asked to imagine myself in trance.

A little kitchenette with a coffee nook that fills the place with the scent of coffee.

There are two doors and--- the blocked off area---

One leads to the bedroom and one leads to the basement.

The basement is full of bedrooms.

The bedroom will select one of those bedrooms and it will be a place of comfort. Every one of these is a place I've called home.

I have never worked out why that is there. But it is.

Minds are weird.

Sometimes cats from my married life are there. Most of the time they're not.

I don't want to describe the main floor, the colors, the way it feels, how I feel there. That's more than I feel comfortable being open about. But I really love how firm and stable it has become. How even after all these years it's still the same room.

Sometimes it's nice to have consistency. I don't have a lot of that.

Anyway...

If you've never done it. Really take a minute to think about yours. Really build a place you can feel is a part of your soul to rest in.

Not gonna lie? It's pretty great!

---

Day 28: Adoration

FULL SCHEDULE MASTER POST

Day 30: VR Helmets

[55ludovicoplace]

Several of these are just outright not true

To the best of my knowledge Stockton Rush never called the Titan indestructible and this is probably a misattribution of Doug Virnig, a subcontractor who worked on Titan, referring to the titanium dome lid of the sub as indestructible. This quote is actually from after the sub vanished as well.

The 77-year-old submariner who has been on repeated trips to the Titanic is their "content expert", Paul-Henri Nargeolet. The CEO, Stockton Rush, is the one piloting, and he's 61 years old.

The Parasite in Chief and Dawood weren't just friends, they were business partners. This did result in the incredibly hilarious public statement made by the King of England that stressed his concern about getting his investie back without mentioning that a citizen of his country is also on board.

The "My Heart Will Go On" thing is a joke and it also just doesn't make sense unless the proposed scenario is that they were listening to just this on loop throughout the entire trip and nobody installed an off button. Also really baseless assumption that this duct-tape-and-gluegun carbon fiber tube has a safety demo of any kind.

This is kind of the one I felt the need to correct. The others are silly minor details that don't matter but this one is sort of just meaningfully factually wrong about a subject that does matter outside of this situation. A submersible isn't a submarine which doesn't meet safety standards, it's a different thing used for different purposes which has different safety concerns. Good luck getting a submarine to the Challenger Deep! A submersible and a submarine actually aren't even certified by the same authorities because one is treated like a type of ship and the other is its own independent type of object. It's a bit like saying something is a crane because it didn't meet safety standards to be classified as a bus. They just aren't even the same type of thing.

It also wouldn't apply in this case because it implies that Titan underwent some sort of safety classification process; it didn't. In fact Oceangate did everything it possibly could to skirt them by launching in a place that technically counts as international waters, classifying what are obviously passengers as "mission specialists" and thus crew members, refusing to submit to optional tests, and outright lying about what tests had been run. There are multiple classes of submersible, and when people talk about Titan not being classed what they meant is that it does not have one of these existing classes because Oceangate claims it's simply too advanced. It is classified as a submersible because it fits the definition of a submersible, not because it's a bad submarine or even because it's a good submersible; it is neither of those things. Yes, though, Stockton Rush did say that safety regulations "needlessly prioritize[s] passenger safety over innovation".

I can't find anything about them needing to buy their own lunch. I did see someone saying that when going on Titan you bring a bottle of water and a sandwich, but they were at sea for around a week beforehand so I see no reason to think those sandwiches were like, brought from home in a lunchbox. You just don't need a lot of food to spend a few hours in a small tube where using the bathroom is ideally to be avoided! This is probably the least strange thing about the way this program is run.

I have no idea where you got the cannibalism thing. We have no reason to think that. I'm sure people have made offhand jokes about it but we don't actually even know if the submersible is still intact or if they were all killed in one single catastrophic event. A few days is not a long enough time for hunger to be an actual threat to survival, and I'm honestly not sure there's even the tools to kill and butcher a human in there.

And, again, there is no way to be sure that the sub is in one piece and they're all still alive, never mind cannibalism. The submersible very clearly had issues with its pressure hull and potentially the window, so it's extremely plausible that it just popped like a balloon and everyone inside was vaporized instantaneously. If the sub is largely intact but the pressure hull is flooded hypothermia or even drowning could have gotten them. We just literally have no idea what happened beyond the fact that whatever it was must have been stupid and preventable. If the hull is intact we will probably never know what happened between the occupants due to the lack of recorders.

Just because people think it might be someone alive in the sub making noises, and one person suggested Nargeolet in particular, doesn't mean that's true. We learned this during the MH370 search - all sorts of things make noise underwater and it's incredibly plausible that something else is making those sounds. Everything that happened after the sub lost contact is uncertain.

Anyway most of this is some degree of pedantic and doesn't matter beyond this one specific news event but please take at least one thing away from this: a submersible is not a worse submarine. They are different things that accomplish different goals. Submersibles are very safe when rules governing them are actually followed. Titan is the Christmas Bullet of submersibles. It is not to be taken as an example. Don't confuse accidents involving submarines, like the Kursk, for submersibles either. Prior to this the last fatal accident involving a manned submersible was in 1974. You practically have to try to make a submersible as unsafe as Titan.

My favourite things about the whole OceanGate disaster, in no particular order

That the vessel was originally named Cyclops II but the CEO renamed it to Titan, so it’s even BETTER than the Titanic

He also called it indestructible

The guy piloting the vessel is an ex-naval captain who has been on several titanic manned trips. But the guy is 77 rn

The billionaire from Pakistan is apparently friends with King Charles. You’d think for someone who’s besties with a guy whose job was literally being born, he’d care more about protecting his bloodline. Instead, he brought his 19 year old with him

Meanwhile, the stepson of one of the other billionaires (I think the British one named Hamish) went to a Blink 182 concert. When questioned about this, he basically went “my family would want me to go to the concert”. Today, minutes after posting about asking for thoughts and prayers, he @‘ed an OF model on Twitter, asking her to sit on his face

Bc it’s part of the safety demo & music track list for the trip, there is a VERY good chance that if there’s still some power left in the sub, it’s playing an instrumental of My Heart Will Go On on loop

Also, the vessel is a submersible bc it doesn’t meet literally any of the safety regulations to be called a submarine. Which the CEO knew, because he’s blatantly said that safety regulations get in the way of progress

The CEO once stated that he thought the future of humanity was not in space, but in the ocean when the surface becomes uninhabitable

Apparently the controller he’s using has REAL bad reviews because the connection always fails

These idiots paid $250k EACH but they had to pack their own lunch. Not even a damn charcuterie board

The pilot’s seat is on the toilet. So whenever someone needs to go, the pilot needs to move

There’s 1 window looking out. That’s it

It’s about the size of a minivan

The sub uses texts (but only to the CEO’s phone) to communicate, as well as StarLink, but they can only access that if they surface

The door literally cannot be opened from inside

There is a decent chance that at least 1 person has been cannibalized (my bet was the pilot since he’s not rich, but bc of the banging sounds, he’s probs not dead, so it may be the CEO)

They’re supposed to run out of oxygen tomorrow (22/06/23) at 7 am est, but tbh, the CO2 scrubber system will probs fail before that

The toilet is a plastic bag

This is only the 3rd time in 3 years the vessel has gone to the Titanic. Every other time, there’s an issue and they gotta turn back within like 4 hours

A lot of major news networks are trying to remain positive, but it’s a HILARIOUS comparison when you go to social media and every single person is like “yeah that shit is built like a cardboard boat, they’re fucked”

The company’s name is literally called OceanGate