#if there are other triggers you want me to add message me

[honeyhotteoks]

chapter fifteen: the taste of you

chapter summary: two weeks have passed and so many things about your life have changed.

warnings: almost entirely smut, but outside of that warnings for allusions to her attack, discussion of triggers, some ptsd symptoms, and there is a moment during sex that reader is triggered but they help her through. smut including: fingering, oral (f receiving), oral (m receiving), absolutely dripping wet messy sex, squirting, rough blowjob, cum on reader, cum in reader lol, knotting and all things a/b/o, ass play, double penetration, some amount of m/m that surprised them all, tears during sex but not dacryphilia, lots and lots of orgasms, basically she almost passes away from cumming pls enjoy

notes: more to come, thank you all for waiting for me 🩵

pairings: alpha!yunho x alpha!mingi x omega!reader

genre: smut, a/b/o/omegaverse, angst, fluff, romance, polyamory

word count: 17k (i’m back with a bang no pun intended)

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Someone has been stuck to your side all day. If it isn’t Yunho in the hall, it’s Mingi by the front door, San in the gym, Seonghwa getting you coffee, and Wooyoung walking you from room to room. After almost two weeks of reacclimating back to the studio and feeling more like yourself, your sudden shadows throw you for a loop.

They know something.

It isn’t until Mingi nearly walks into the bathroom with you that you spin on your heel and give him a soft push backwards to clear some space.

“What’s wrong?” He straightens up immediately.

“With me?” Your brows go high, “Nothing, I’m feeling great. I am wondering why you feel the need to come pee with me, though,”

He blushes red, “Shit,” he steps back, “sorry,”

“Is something going on?” Your eyes narrow, “I feel like I’ve been assigned a secret service detail but no one told me,”

He chews at the inside of his lip and then finally sighs, “Don’t freak out,”

“Not a great start,” You point out.

“You’re perfectly safe,” He adds, taking a step forward.

“Also not good,” Your stomach flips, “Mingi, what’s happening?”

“Minseok is getting out of the hospital today,” He says in a rush, “and I’m sure he won’t show up here, he’s not an idiot, but it would make me feel better if I knew you were with someone,”

“Oh,” You relax back against the wall.

“You’re not upset?”

“That you want to keep me safe?” You smile, “No, I’m not upset,”

“It just has us a little on edge,” He tells you honestly, “but we didn’t want to worry you with how much better you’ve been doing,”

“Who’s we?” You smile.

“Um,” He taps his phone, unlocking it and glancing down at a series of messages, “me and Yunho, obviously. Seonghwa, Woo, and San,”

You crane your neck to see the screen and laugh immediately at the name of the group chat, “y/n Protection Squad?”

“That was all Woo,” Mingi blushes again and tucks away his phone, “you know him,”

“Mhm,” You raise an eyebrow.

“We probably should have told you,” He concedes.

“Probably,” You nod, “but honestly it’s cute,”

“We just,” He trails off, “well you know,”

“Yeah,” You tap the edge of his phone, “if you’re reporting my coordinates to each other though… you could just text me. Actually, hold on,”

You pull out your own phone and scroll through the settings until you find the right thing, “There,” you smile up at him, “you and Yunho have my location now,”

His eyes widen, “Oh,”

“If you’re worried,” You shrug, “I trust you both not to abuse it.”

He flicks through his own settings, “Now you have mine,” he says, “I’m sure Yunho will do the same once we talk to him,”

“Thanks,” You smile and tuck your phone away.

He doesn’t move, he just stays steady next to you as if he’s waiting for you to say something more.

With a curt jerk of your head behind you, you say, “Okay, but I think I’m safe in the bathroom,”

“Right,” He takes a big step back, “sorry, babe,”

“Don’t be sorry,” You reach out and squeeze his arm, “I’m heading for the gym after this if you’re looking for me,”

“Cool,” He smiles, “thanks,”

“Mhm,” You start to back up through the swinging door into the bathroom, and as you do you watch him quickly tap out a text on his phone. No doubt a report that you’re heading to the gym and wondering who’s in there already.

In any other circumstance this level of hovering would bother you, but they more than mean well. Even though you know Minseok won’t pop up out of nowhere, he truly would have no rational reason to, the presence of your pack around you and the family you’ve built at the studio backing you up, it means everything for your level of comfort here.

The past two weeks have been a dream. Not every second of it, of course, especially with everything it took to reacclimate to work, but having a new home with them has been everything. In the span of a week Yunho and Mingi helped clear you out of your old apartment and break your lease, breakdown the bedrooms at their apartment to transition Mingi’s old room into a shared bedroom, and installed a pack bed that had more than enough room for you and both your alphas.

In the gym you find Wooyoung, lounging on one of the stationary bikes playing on his phone.

“Did Mingi send you?” You tease him immediately.

He grins, “Maybe,”

“You could have told me he was getting out today,” You nudge him as you pass by, sitting on your own bike.

“I know,” He pockets his phone and turns towards you on the seat, “but I didn’t want you to be anxious.”

“Fair,”

He drags a hand through his hair and sighs, “Hey, listen,” he says, “can you tell Yunho I’m not going to make it by this weekend?”

Your eyes narrow, “That depends,” you say, “are you two going to let me in on your weird little secret plans?”

Wooyoung smirks.

For the past week ever since Yunho had moved into the larger bedroom his old room was closed tight, and every few days Wooyoung was stopping by to see you but also to slip away with Yunho and work on something.

“It’s a nest, right?” You prod him, “what else would he be so secretive about?”

“Don’t ruin the surprise,” Wooyoung rolls his eyes, “let the man do a nice thing for his girlfriend,”

That word is new, along with other words that sum up what you are to each other. Partners, pack, lovers, mates, girlfriend, boyfriends, it’s all tangled up and happening fast but your stomach doesn’t do a nervous flip like it used to, you just feel warm.

“Traditionally, I think I’m supposed to make my own nest,” You point out.

“He knows that,” Wooyoung rolls his eyes, “that’s why he called me. Now my lips are sealed, stop asking.”

“Fine,”

He pulls at the front of his shirt to get some airflow and sighs, “So, you’ll tell him?”

“Oh,” You nod, remembering his original question, “sure, is something up this weekend?”

He looks at you and raises his brows, “I’m due for a heat,” he explains, “and I just started feeling achy this morning,”

“Got it,” You nod, “can I get you anything?”

He shakes his head, “No, I’m fine, I’ll probably take tomorrow off and then see where the weekend goes,”

“I’ll be around,” You let him know, “I can deliver ice cream and sexy magazines,”

“Shut up,” He smirks.

“Wait,” You smile, “what are you doing about Yeosang?”

His face falls entirely. They’ve been nearly inseparable since they met, even though you yourself still haven’t met him. But you’ve learned enough about him by proxy that you think he’s the right kind of guy for your best friend.

Wooyoung fiddles with the edge of his t-shirt, “I don’t know,”

“You’ll tell him?” You ask.

“Sure,” His voice sounds strained, “I mean… I don’t know how else to explain disappearing for three days.”

“Mhm,” You leave him the space to keep working it out.

“I really don’t think he should meet San and Hwa during,” He says, “I was planning on introducing them beforehand, but you know, that never really worked out.”

“Woo,” You get his attention, “I think you should have whoever you want for your heat, not worry about that,”

“I’m not even sure he’d want to be there,” Wooyoung blushes a bit, looking down, “we keep avoiding the topic.”

“You met like a month ago,” You point out, “not even,”

“So?”

“I’m saying it’s not weird it hasn’t come up,” You soothe him, and you can see clearly how close to his heat he is if his emotions are this on edge, “because the relationship is new.”

“Oh,” He deflates.

“You should get home,” You reach across, giving his shoulder a squeeze, “relax and figure out what you want to do, and then talk to them.”

“I know,” He sighs, “you’re right,”

Silence settles for a moment, and you consider starting up a cardio routine on the bike, but you actually want nothing less today, something’s been itching at you and taking your focus, and with the knowledge that Minseok is out it feels like now or never. With Wooyoung being down for the count next to you, any lingering motivation you would have had flies right out the window.

“Okay,” You stretch your arms and hop up, “if Coach Choi asks, I did forty-five minutes,”

Wooyoung snorts a laugh, “Fucking same,”

It’s late in the day, you should probably pack up your things anyways. The halls have quieted down, the gym relatively empty, and short of Mingi and Yunho finishing their work in the back reviewing next steps and mocking up the next schedule, you’re almost done for the day.

A flickering memory passes through you.

“Hey,” You nudge Wooyoung again, “can you please wait to report my whereabouts for like twenty minutes?”

“Why?” He counters.

You’re quiet, and you give him a look.

He knows where you’re going in a heartbeat, “You want me to come with you?”

You shake your head, “No, I want to do this alone.”

“Okay,” He murmurs, “but text me if you need,”

“I will,”

He watches you go, but you ignore the pressing eyes at your back. Now with twenty minutes of freedom, you check that the hall is empty and move quickly down the one direction you’ve hated walking these past two weeks.

You haven’t been into that particular studio room since it happened. The first day back to work was strange, full of nervous energy and people who didn’t quite want to meet your eyes without some form of uncomfortable pity, but day two was better. You made the right jokes, you smiled wide, and as long as you didn’t acknowledge that room, everything was fine. Now that two weeks have passed, it’s like this room doesn’t even exist and everyone’s adapted to that new reality without a peep.

So far you’ve passed the door eight times and each time you’ve done a damn good job of not even making eye contact with it, barely even thinking about it, not even a little bit.

But something about today is different, maybe that it’s late in the day again, the sunlight dropping in the sky and the halls quieter than they’ve been since you came back. Maybe it’s the new knowledge he’s walking around free. You don’t know exactly what pulls you right in front of the tightly shut studio door, but something deep in your gut does and you find yourself staring at the wood grain, palms slick and trembling against your thighs. It takes a few minutes to hype yourself up enough to push through the door, your stomach a churning mess of knots and images flickering in your mind, but at the count of three whispered on your lips you finally do it.

For some reason your mind expects a dark room, shattered glass, streaks of blood, and Minseok standing in the middle of it all waiting for you, that’s the last thought that rockets across your brain as you stumble over the threshold, but it’s so far and away the opposite that it takes the rug right out from under you.

The room is bright and completely normal, no glass or horror to be seen, and Choi San is seated right in the middle of the floor with one leg extended as he stretches out his muscles. It’s clear from his expression that you startled him a bit, all but falling into the room with flushed cheeks and nervous eyes, but he calms immediately.

He straightens his spine and meets your eyes in the mirror, “Hey,”

“Uh,” You pry your hand away from the door handle, “hey,”

“You alright?” His head tilts slightly as he looks at you.

“Sure,” You answer, a little too quickly, “sorry, I didn’t know you were in here,”

“Mhm,” He nods, and for a moment he’s quiet, waiting for you to say something.

“I’ll just,” You start, your foot sliding backwards so you can make a quick exit.

San just shakes his head, pushing himself up to his feet and turning towards you, “Come in,”

“Eh,” You’re ready to back out now, he just has to let you.

“y/n,” He beckons you forward with a jerk of his head, “you clearly are trying to get past this and I’m in your way, come in. I’ll let you do that,”

Your mouth is dry and it feels a little like being caught under a microscope with how accurate his assessment is.

San takes your silence as a yes and grabs his hoodie from the floor, smiling close-lipped at you as he moves to the side. Suddenly he’s no longer in the mirror in front of you, and memories start to flood back of the last time you were alone in this practice room, last time this door opened and someone appeared behind you in the reflection.

“San!” You spin on your heel, reaching to catch him before he’s truly gone.

“Hey,” He soothes you, gently passing a hand down your upper arm, “take a breath, you’re safe.”

“S-stay?” You manage it, your nails digging into his skin through the thick fabric of his sweatshirt, “For a second?”

He softens, “Let me get Yunho and Mingi,”

You shake your head, “Please don’t.”

His brows knit together, “Why not?”

You swallow tightly, feeling the entire scene playing out behind you, and you could swear that if you just turned around you could see it all. Your body on the floor, your alphas above you, the flooding, rushing water in your ears of subspace.

“y/n,” San prompts you again, “why don’t you want your alphas?”

San’s thumb strokes a tender line into your skin, waiting for your answer and you exhale slowly as you center yourself, “They worry for me,”

“Mhm,” He nods, but lets you continue.

“They wanted me to take more time off,” You explain, “but I’m ready to be here,”

He waits another beat, and then lays his other hand over your tense fingers, pulling them gently away from his sleeve, “Are you?”

You swallow tightly, “Work, yes,” you tell him, “this room is hard.”

“Let’s go then,” He murmurs, tugging at your hand just a little as if to draw you out of the room, down the hall, and right back into your alphas arms, but you shake your head.

“Can you just wait a minute?” You finally ask, “Maybe what I need is a Choi San pep talk,”

He sighs heavily, his hands dropping away from you. For a second you think he’s going to leave, and then he moves around you to the center of the studio to plop right back down onto the floor, “Come on then,”

The knots release at his tone and you follow him. Your body is still full of nerves, but you’ve been in this studio a hundred other times before and right now there’s no Minseok. You’re not alone, you’re with your friend.

San smiles up at you and waves you down to the floor, “Stretch,”

“I already stretched,” You tell him as you ease yourself down next to him.

“Stretch again,” He prompts you, “it’s good for you.”

You huff a laugh through closed lips, extending the lines of your body out to mirror him and he nods in approval. It’s quiet for a little while, your bodies shifting into familiar positions one after another, moving silently in sync. San watches you in the mirror, correcting your form without saying a word, until he finally breaks the silence.

“It’s just a room,” He says, “that’s all it is now.”

Tight pinpricks of tears play at the edges of your vision but you clear your throat and nod, “I know,”

“There’s not a trace of him left,” San adds.

The words don’t quite make sense and you finally look away from him in the mirror to turn towards him, “What?”

He drops his arms out of another stretch and turns to you, “He’s gone,” he clarifies, “all his things, his scent, recordings, all of it.”

“W-who,” You start, but you know, “when did you do that?”

“That night,” He answers you with ease, “I just want you to know you won’t run into a trace of him here, not in this room, not anywhere.”

Your throat tightens.

“I can’t do much,” He explains, resting a hand on your knee, “I’m not an omega like Woo, and we’re not…” he searches for the right words but settles with a sigh, “we’re not close like you and Seonghwa, but you’re my friend and we’ve been through things together. I did what I could do for you,”

“San,” You manage, eyes swimming now, “I can’t believe you did all that,”

He gives your knee a squeeze, “It’s nothing,” he assures, “you deserve to feel safe here. You are safe here.”

You launch yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders tightly, “Thank you,”

He holds you gingerly, one hand pressed between your shoulder blades as he nods.

It takes you a moment to get yourself under control, emotions swirling, but finally you drop back out of the hug and sweep your fingertips under your watery eyes to clear the potential tears.

“Mingi said,” He starts, catching himself with a heavy sigh before continuing, “he said you dropped the charges?”

“Yeah,”

“Why?” He asks genuinely.

For as perceptive as San is sometimes, he’s clueless about one thing. You sigh, not sure whether you should point out the glaring Seonghwa shaped blindspot in his peripherals, “Nothing would be worth any of you getting in trouble,”

“You’re worth that,” San points out calmly, “we all did what we did for a reason, we’re not inherently violent men, y/n.”

“I know that,” You nod.

“Mm,” He shakes his head and adjusts his position on the hardwood floor, “what’s done is done, but we were all willing to take some consequences for you. You’re our friend, our teammate. You’re Yunho and Mingi’s omega too, you’re… you’re a person and what Minseok did to you was wrong.”

“I know,” You repeat, finding his hand and squeezing it tightly, “but this is what I want. I want to go back to normal with my family and be happy, it’s been too long since we’ve had that,”

He nods, giving your hand a squeeze back. You can see that there’s a protest on his tongue, an argument to be made about what’s right and wrong, but he holds himself back.

In the quiet, honesty floods forward on your tongue, “I also wasn’t going to let Seonghwa ask for a single dime from his parents again,”

San’s fingers tighten involuntarily and his head snaps to the side, “What?”

“You heard me,”

San’s jaw pulses and relaxes, and then he separates your hands, dragging his own through his mess of black hair with a heavy sigh. You let him sit with it for a moment, nothing feeling quite right to say at the moment.

He nods finally and turns his head towards you just a little, “He told you?”

“Yes,”

“And,” San starts, but any words he might have fall short, he looks to you for something more.

“He hasn’t taken money from them in a while,” You start off, and San’s eyes widen just slightly, “I wasn’t going to let him get dragged back into their shit for me,”

San swallows.

“He misses you,” You offer, “and I know you miss him too.”

He looks away again, his hands clenching tight into fists and then releasing. “y/n,” He says, “you shouldn’t get involved,”

“I’m not,” You want to reach out and take his hand, but from his body language you know it’s a bad idea, “I haven’t said anything about this in months, but I’m as much a friend to you as I am to Seonghwa, so I would never lie to you.”

He considers your words for a long beat, and then he sighs, “Was forgiving them worth it?”

“Yunho and Mingi?”

He nods.

“Yes,” You tell him unequivocally, “but Sannie, they had to forgive me too.”

He shifts on the floor, this time wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug, and you let your arms fold around him in the embrace. You run one hand up and down his back, hoping it gives him some amount of comfort even if it's small.

“I do miss him,” He murmurs, “all the time,”

“I did too,” You confess, “even when I was angry,”

Footsteps behind you both send a chill through you, and you jump at the sound.

“It’s alright,” San soothes you, glancing into the mirror to see who’s come in, “it’s just your alphas,”

You break away from San’s hug to look, needing to see for yourself, but feel your body fully relax at the sight of them.

“Hey,” Yunho gives a close-lipped smile, concern clearly visible in his expression, “you guys okay?”

“Mhm,” San nods, pushing off the floor, “all good,”

Yunho and Mingi both look at you.

“San was helping me be back in here,” You tell them honestly, “but I’m okay,”

Mingi helps you to your feet with an outstretched hand and once you’re up, he cups your cheek to bring your eyes up to his, “You sure?”

You nod, quietly communicating with your eyes that if there’s anything to say it should be said privately.

“I should go,” San says, grabbing his bag off the floor by the mirrors.

Pulling back you catch him before he jogs out, “Thank you, seriously,”

He nods, “You too,”

He gives a courtesy nod to Yunho and Mingi, and jogs out faster than anyone can ask any follow ups.

They’re quiet for a moment, but even just a second or two of strange silence in this room after being triggered is enough to make your skin crawl, and you reach for Yunho’s hand.

“Jagi?” He checks.

“Can we get out of here, please?”

Mingi grabs your things, “Let’s go,”

Yunho presses a warm kiss to your forehead as he turns to leave, tucking you under his arm, “Come on,”

In the hall, Mingi finds your free hand and twines your fingers together, “Okay?”

“Mostly,” You sigh now that you’re on your way out of the building and wrapped up in their comforting scents, “I think we can start having practices in there again, but maybe not all of them right away?”

Mingi’s hand pulses in yours, but Yunho speaks first, “If you’re ready for that, I’ll shift Friday afternoons back in there.”

“I’m ready,” You nod.

The three of you make your way out into the streets of Seoul, and Yunho smiles, “That way if it’s tough, at least it’s Friday and you can just come home and relax with us.”

“Smart,” Mingi comments.

Your chest warms, “That’s perfect, I love you.”

Those words have been coming more easily ever since the kitchen, but you watch the tips of Yunho’s ears go pink still, “I love you too,”

“Is San alright?” Mingi asks as you approach the car, “he seemed off,”

“He’s got some things going on, but he will be.” It’s not your place, not with something like this.

He nods, and as Yunho unlocks the car he slides into the backseat and reaches out a hand for you, “Let’s go home.”

You slide into his side, wondering a little about what San will do next. Part of you wants to smack him and tell him he’s being an idiot and he needs to get over this and there’s no sense in talking yourself out of happiness, but you didn’t listen to advice like that when you were making all the same mistakes. You have to let him come to it in his own time.

As the car pulls away you catch a message on your phone from Wooyoung.

Heading home - you good?

You tap back a fast reply - All good. Focus on your heat, and CALL YEOSANG.

Thanks Mom. - He replies.

You let your phone drop, and Mingi’s hand lands warmly on your thigh to give you a squeeze. The thought of Wooyoung going into heat is making your mind flick back to your own. His hands, this car, the way Yunho glances at you in the rearview mirror. It’s all seared into your memory from a different time.

Not only that, and you’re a little ashamed to admit it, but there’s something to be said for the way your alphas flanked you all day just to keep you safe. After ten hours of it, you’re a little addicted to the way Yunho���s hand feels on the small of your back or the weight of Mingi’s hand on your thigh. If anyone at the studio was unaware of your relationship, it’s crystal clear now. They kept close to you as if Minseok was around any corner, and you suspect their intensity was as much for them as it was for you.

They stay stuck to you until you’re all safely back in the apartment, and then suddenly with the door locked tight behind you, they fall away. Mingi stretches and yawns, dropping his coat on a hook by the door before disappearing into the kitchen to start dinner. Yunho drops a perfunctory kiss on the crown of your head and mentions that he’s going to change, and then you’re standing in the foyer by yourself.

It’s been days since you’ve felt something stirring in you, possibly even weeks. You haven’t had room to feel that pull in your gut, heat flushing your cheeks, wetness pooling in your core. You’ve been too busy and too stressed to be horny, but suddenly you’re full of wanting.

You’re not in heat, nowhere even close, but with the sudden way you need to touch them it almost feels like that.

Your cunt is throbbing.

At the sound of a pan making contact with the stovetop in the kitchen, your legs start moving.

Mingi glances to the side when he sees you enter the kitchen and he smiles, “Hey, babe,”

“Can dinner wait?” You say in a rush.

His brows draw together and he turns towards you, “What’s up?”

“I just,” You can’t help but get distracted by his muscled arms, the dip of his chest where his tank top cuts low, “maybe we should order in,”

“I thought you wanted japchae?” He nods towards the pan to his side.

You all but pounce on him when you wrap your arms around his shoulders and tug his lips down to meet yours, pressing the length of your body against his and panting gently against his lips, “Mingi,”

He makes a muffled sigh, his hands closing on your waist as he holds you up, his body relaxing into yours naturally, “Babe?”

“Shh,” You shake your head a little, your hand skating down his chest and over his nipple.

He shudders and you feel him responding instantly, hardening against your belly. His mouth parts, tongue dipping past your lips to flick along yours, hot breath warm and welcome against your cheek.

Your body pulses with need, and the thick perfume of your scent fills the kitchen. Mingi’s hands tighten as he inhales the rich syrupy honey and he breaks the kiss, “Baby,” he softens and finds your eyes, “when’s your heat?”

“Not now,” You shake your head and brush him off, pulling at his t-shirt again in an attempt to drag his lips to yours, “it’s not for at least another month,”

“Then what’s gotten into you?” He asks, angling away to try and get to the bottom of your sudden neediness.

You know it technically isn’t a rejection, but god it still feels like one, and you push back two steps to clear some space, “Nothing,” you sigh, “sorry,”

“Whoa, whoa,” Mingi shakes his head and catches your hand in his, “wherever your brain just went, you’re wrong,”

“If you’re not in the mood,” Embarrassment feels thick around you and you can’t quite meet his eyes.

Mingi laughs sharply and steps close again, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your hair, “I have never not been in the mood with you, babe,”

You swallow tightly, nodding into his chest.

“But,” He adds, “it’s been a while since we’ve done anything, and ever since… you’ve been tense every time things get a little heated,”

“I’m sorry,” You breathe.

“Why in the world are you apologizing?” Mingi groans and separates from you so he can look at you eye to eye, his hands cupping your cheeks.

Your throat tightens. There’s a million reasons you feel sorry, but you sigh into him and lean against his warm palm, “I feel like I can’t get my shit together, it’s a lot for you both to put up with. I just want to want you, I want it to be like it was. I don’t want him here, I… I don’t know,”

Mingi listens patiently, but as you start to lose steam he nods, “Got it,” he steps forward and scoops you up into his arms, “this is more serious than I thought,”

“M-Mingi, what are you doing?” You grip his shoulders as he maneuvers you bridal style into his arms before carrying you out into the next room.

“Yunho!” Mingi calls as he heads for the hall, “Get out here,”

He doesn’t stop at Yunho’s bedroom door though, instead he pushes further down the hall to his bedroom - your bedroom. The room doesn’t quite feel like yours yet, but with the changes he’s made to the space to welcome you and Yunho into it, and the addition of the sprawling pack bed, you know it will start to feel more and more like yours everyday.

Behind Mingi you hear Yunho’s old bedroom door open and a questioning sound, but you barely hear it as Mingi stops at the foot of the bed and plops you straight down in the center of it.

“What,” You start to ask, but Mingi turns from you as Yunho follows into the room.

“What’s going on?” He asks, glancing between the two of you.

“Our girlfriend,” He smiles at the word, keeping his eyes on you while he addresses Yunho, “seems to be under the impression that she’s too much for us to put up with,”

You open your mouth to protest, but Yunho’s head snaps to yours, “What?”

“Mm,” Mingi nods, “ridiculous, I know, but she seems to think having a completely normal response to a traumatic incident is a lot for us to deal with,”

Your cheeks grow hot, “Mingi, stop,”

“I was gone for three minutes,” Yunho’s brow furrows, “what could have happened in three minutes?”

“y/n tried to jump my bones,” Mingi grins.

“You’re leaving out the part where you rejected me,” You can’t stop the words, the way he pushed you away in the kitchen still stinging.

He reaches for you then, his hand closing around your ankle to drag you down the bed so that you’re seated on the edge. You let out a small noise of surprise, but before you can work out what he’s doing, he’s dropped your foot and crouched in front of you, wide hands resting on your hips.

“Not a rejection,” He shakes his head, face far more serious, “a question.”

“What was the question?” Yunho asks, moving further into the room. He leaves you both space, but leans his hips against the dresser behind Mingi.

“I want to know what’s gotten into you,” Mingi reaches up, brushing your cheek gingerly and moving to stroke your hair, “because I want nothing more than to have you, pretty much every second of every day, but never at the expense of hurting you.”

“O-oh,” You soften a little at that.

Mingi lips turn up slightly in a smile, “You’re not too much,” he says quietly, “you’re not something for us to put up with, and you don’t have to apologize to us for anything. Yunho, back me up here,”

He takes a steady breath in, moving to crouch next to Mingi, “There’s nothing to put up with,” he says, “there’s just this thing that happened that we have to work through together and that’s not an obligation. You and what you need are not obligations.”

Warmth pricks at your eyes and your stomach flutters.

“I also think there’s something you may not realize,” Mingi adds, drawing your attention back to him, “but Yunho and I are also scared of hurting you, or triggering something by accident.”

Yunho nods immediately, one hand finding your thigh to give you a comforting squeeze.

“Yeah?”

“Everytime you freeze up or flinch I wonder if I should have touched you differently, or not touched you at all,” Yunho admits.

Mingi nods, “The minute I catch the scent of your fear, I’m right back in that room with you. What happened affected all of us, there’s going to be things we both do that you have to deal with too, does that make sense?”

The knot between your shoulders releases and you sigh, “Yeah,”

“Like today, if you hadn’t been with one of us all day I think I would have gone insane,” Mingi offers.

Yunho swallows tightly and nods, “Completely insane,”

You can’t help but smile, “You both seemed pretty relaxed,”

“That’s because I could see you,” Yunho smiles, stroking his hand up and down your thigh, “with Minseok out in the world again our protective instincts are in hyperdrive, sweetheart,”

“I’m,” You start to say, but Mingi cuts you off.

“Don’t you dare say you’re sorry,” He sighs.

“I wasn’t,” You nudge him with your knee, “I was going to say that I’m glad,”

“Oh,” He deflates.

“I feel bad that there’s a reason for you to feel so tense,” You clarify a little, “but to have you both there for me like that? All I felt was safe, all day.”

“Good,” Yunho brings your knuckles to his lips and presses a kiss there, “that’s good.”

“Honestly,” You laugh a little, “I liked it,”

“Well that was obvious,” Mingi squeezes your hip, “from the way you perfumed all over me,”

“Shut up,” You blush again.

“Mm,” Yunho teases a little, “protective alphas get you hot, hmm?”

“Oh my god,” You roll your eyes, but the flutter in your lower belly tends to agree with him.

Mingi smiles, but clears his throat and starts to sober, “Also, babe,” he squeezes you, “as much as I wanted to fuck you over the kitchen counter, I don’t think the first time we have sex outside of your heat should be so careless,”

Your face drops, realization stretching into you, “You’re right,”

“We need to take our time,” Mingi murmurs, “especially when we aren’t sure of your triggers yet,”

“Definitely,” Yunho nods.

“That makes sense,” You sigh.

“So,” Mingi’s hands slide off you then and he rocks back on his heels, clapping Yunho on the shoulder as he stands, “don’t apologize like that again,”

You feel a little like the world has tilted again.

“I can get dinner going,” Mingi starts to say, and you catch a confused flicker in Yunho’s eyes too as he turns from you to look up at his best friend.

“Mingi,” You try to interrupt him but he’s focused elsewhere, still rambling on about dinner, “Mingi!”

“What?” He turns around, eyes a little wide.

“Are you really not going to fuck me after all that?” You manage.

He shifts from foot to foot and where he had all the right things to say a moment ago, now he seems at a loss for words, “I didn’t think you’d want to after today, with the studio and we were just talking about him,”

Yunho waits, looking back up at you.

“I’m not that fragile,” You shake your head, “and he’s been in my head all day. He always is,”

Yunho’s jaw tightens and releases.

“And you’re right, we should take a little slow,” You tell them, “but I’m ready to figure that out together, I want you both so badly it’s driving me crazy,”

Mingi’s tongue darts out, wetting his lips as he takes a step back towards you both, “You’re sure?”

“Mingi,” You sigh, “baby, I’m sure, I’m ready to climb the walls I’m so horny, and I just really wanted one night where,”

Your words are cut off instantly, Yunho launching up into your space to catch you in a frenzied kiss, your legs parting open to let him crowd you more closely. You moan against his lips, hands finding their way into his hair, your hot center pressed up against his stomach as he dips you back into the sheets.

“Oh, thank god,” Your hips buck up into him as you moan, your head falling back to the mattress.

He takes a deep inhale, shivering in your arms, “You smelling this good outside of your heat should be illegal,”

“Yeah?” You pant, pulling him back to your mouth for another kiss.

“Mhm,” He hums against your lips, “it’s enough to send me into a rut, baby,”

You shudder, the thought of him rutting endlessly into you is enough to make you come, but when you go to pull him closer again you feel this time it’s not you who froze up, but Yunho.

“H-hey,” You lean back a little, smoothing the hair out of his face and catching his guilty expression, “what’s wrong?”

Mingi stands stock still to the side, his arms crossed and a serious expression across his face.

“I didn’t mean to say that,” He shakes his head, “I just meant you’re perfect, you’re… I didn’t mean that,”

It takes a second for your brain to catch up, but the penny drops when you think of Minseok. His excuses, his pleas, all the things he must have said to them to try to weasel out of his actions while you were trapped in headspace.

“Okay,” You shuffle back a little and sit up, reaching up for Mingi, “can you please come over here? You’re making me nervous standing around like a bodyguard,”

He drops his arms and nods, finding a place next to you on the bed, hands in his lap.

“Funny enough,” You catch Yunho’s eye, “the thought of you in a rut didn’t bother me at all,”

Yunho’s expression clears a bit, “It didn’t?”

You shake your head, “No,” you explain, “if it bothers you, then that’s different, but if you’re just worried about upsetting me,”

Yunho sighs heavily, dropping his forehead to your thighs as he sinks back to a kneeling seat on the floor, “We’re a mess,”

“Fully,” You laugh lightly, “we’re never going to christen this bed if we keep walking on eggshells,”

Mingi’s shoulders relax, and he reaches to press a hand to your upper back, fingers lightly curling around the sides of your neck. A pleasant, unexpected thrill passes through you at the sensation, and quietly you catalog it. Your neck has been such a sore, sensitive spot since the incident, but right now Mingi’s hand feels right.

“What do we do?” Yunho kisses your thighs and leans back up, “I don’t think either one of us is willing to hurt you,”

Mingi shakes his head.

“Accidentally triggering me isn’t willingness to hurt me,” You correct him softly, “and triggering me doesn’t necessarily mean I fall to pieces,”

He nods a little.

“Like what you did last week,” You point out to him, “when you kissed my neck,”

Gears start to turn in his brain, you watch it happening as his expression changes and you and Mingi both stay quiet while he works it out.

Finally, Yunho nods, “What triggers do we know about?”

“When you touch my neck,” The easiest, and most obvious.

You all think for a moment, and Mingi clears his throat, “You get jumpy when we’re both behind you,”

“That’s true,” You nod, “when I can’t see either of you,”

“Okay,” Yunho nods, “what else?”

You don’t want to think through the incident, not right now, but your mind skips over little moments the past few weeks and all the ways you’ve been on edge. Your eyes flick up to the space on the wall above the dresser, to the large reflection that stretches across the wall, “Mirrors,”

“Good,” Yunho dips forward and kisses you quickly on the forehead before standing, “give me a hand with this,” he says to Mingi.

Your other alpha responds immediately, and you watch as they lift the mirror up off the wall with ease and maneuver it out of the room without a second thought, silently communicating with each other the entire time.

Emotion fills your chest, warmth spreading through you when they cross back into the room looking accomplished. Yunho takes a seat next to you on the edge of the bed and offers you a hand, “Anything else?”

You slip your hand into his as Mingi does the same on your opposite side. You chew the inside of your lip, thinking once again through all the potential pockets of fear. Minseok’s voice echoes in your head - Submit. Heel. Don’t move an inch.

“Tone,” You offer quietly, “I can’t do that,”

It’s something some couples play with in bed, you’ve learned that in your research over the past couple of weeks into subspace and how it works. Some omegas want their alpha to use tone, they relish in the floating disconnection of subspace and the way their body becomes pliant and limp at the hands of their partner. You can’t imagine it, you can’t imagine ever wanting to release that level of control again.

Mingi’s hand grips yours, and he shakes his head, jaw too tightly clenched to form words.

“Hey,” Yunho soothes you, wrapping his arms around you, “that’s not even on the table, it’s not even near the table, okay? We might mess up in other ways without knowing, but I promise you, we’ll never do that with this. Tone isn’t something you use by mistake,”

You nod, and Mingi interjects softly, “You have to want it, you have to put intention behind it to push an omega to comply, that’s not something we can fuck up in the heat of the moment,”

“Okay,” The nerves in your stomach settle.

“If you’re worried though,” Yunho smooths a hand down your back, “we can be a little more careful about giving you directions, or being bossy,”

“Being alphas?” You laugh and shake your head, “No, no honestly I’ve always liked that and I don’t want this fear to ruin that,”

“Okay,” He nods, a soft smile on his lips, “if something doesn’t feel right though, you tell us.”

“For any of it,” Mingi adds, “stop us in the moment, we’ll readjust.”

“Or stop us full on,” Yunho notes, “I know you want to try, but there’s never a point we can’t stop,”

“I know that,” You nod, “I know I’m safe with you both.”

“Always,” Mingi squeezes your hand again, just a quick pulse to punctuate his intention, the truth behind it.

“What about you?” You ask softly, looking between them.

“Us?” Mingi asks.

“Is there something… I don’t know, that day was terrible but I don’t remember a good bit of it,” You explain, “I don’t know what happened when I was under, what might bother you?”

“I don’t know,” Yunho says honestly, “I’m more scared of hurting you than anything, so maybe don’t push yourself too hard?”

“If something starts to bother me?” You clarify.

He nods, “Yeah,”

“I can do that,” You nod, “we can take it slow,”

“Same for me,” Mingi nods, “we’ll figure it out together.”

It’s quiet for a moment, both of them just resting their hands on your body, and you realize they’re not ready to make the first move.

“Yunho,” You take his hand, sliding it up your thigh to your waistband, “I liked what you were doing before,”

“Yeah?” His expression relaxes, tension bleeding out of the room now that you’ve helped change the course.

“Mhm,” You shift on the bed to lean back into Mingi’s body next to yours and let your legs fall open naturally, “it’s been a long time, will you touch me?”

His fingers slide over your side, playing with the edge of your shirt.

“Will you take care of me?” You murmur.

He nods, his eyes darkening a bit and flicking over your body, darting up once to silently communicate with Mingi, “Lay back, sweetheart,”

Mingi shifts to sit next to you, his legs dropping over the edge of the bed and his broad hands coming to your shoulders. “How’s this?” He asks as he draws you down to lie next to him, both flat on your backs but his arm tucked under your neck so he can cuddle you into his side.

“So nice,” You murmur.

“I’ve missed this,” Yunho hums pleasantly as he peels your leggings down over your hips, “I regretted not putting my mouth on you more the minute your heat was over,”

A thrill rolls through you at his words and you shiver, “Yeah?”

“Mhm,” He finishing rolling off your leggings and smooths his hands up and down your thighs, catching over your hips and hooking his thumbs in the sides of your thong, “you taste like you were made for us,”

“God,” You shiver, letting your head fall back onto Mingi’s bicep.

“So sweet,” Mingi adds, his free hand coming to rest on your chest, slowly dragging up the fabric of your shirt with his fingers.

“You know,” Yunho taps the side of your hip to prompt you to lift them and you shift immediately so he can discard your underwear too, “now that you’re not in heat we can actually take our time,”

“O-oh,” You shudder.

“Good point,” Mingi smiles, adjusting himself so he’s on his side now to look down at you, “no rush,”

You shiver as Yunho adjusts your legs open, pressing a tender kiss to the inside of your knee as he settles between your splayed thighs. A flutter of anticipation bubbles in you and you sigh, “I don’t know,” you smile, “I might start begging for a knot any second,”

Yunho huffs a little laugh, “You can beg all you want,”

Your mouth runs dry at the implication and you look down, “Yeah?”

He nods, but his eyes are glued to your sex, his expression hungry, “Mhm, this time you don’t need a knot, you just want one.”

You open your mouth to say something, but every thought falls right out of your head when Yunho blows a cool stream of air over your exposed core, your body twitching in response.

“God damn,” Mingi curses, shifting a bit so his arm slides out from under you, leaning up so he can get a good view.

“How are you feeling, sweetheart?” Yunho murmurs, placing a tender kiss to the inside of your right thigh, slowly kissing his way to the top of your mound.

Your hips jolt in response, a spike of needy pleasure lighting up your spine and you nod, “So good,”

“Good girl,” He hums, dipping forwards and kissing your cunt in earnest, tongue dragging up through your folds slow and steady until he finds your tender bud.

You drop back against the sheets, your body shifting and moving on its own as you arch into his touch, your thighs already trembling at the sensation of pleasure building in your body after so much time.

“Oh, baby,” Mingi says, his voice husky, “you’re so beautiful,”

Yunho’s tongue teases you slowly, exploring you with little touches and licks, and you feel him sigh pleasantly between your thighs as he gets comfortable. Mingi slips lower in the bed, pushing your shirt up over your breasts before dropping his own lips to your hot skin. They kiss like they want to breathe you in until they’re dizzy, and as your eyes slip closed all you can focus on is the feeling of their hands holding you, their tongues, warm breath against your dampened skin.

Hands push your sports bra up to strip you off and leave you bare and then Mingi’s mouth closes over one nipple while his fingers tease the other, flicking and sucking in perfect rhythm to match Yunho’s tongue on your clit.

“God,” You shiver, heat pooling low in your belly, “oh, God,”

Yunho hums against you, pushing closer to your wet center so he can suck your tender clit.

You moan sharply, the feeling heady and dizzying, and you reach down to wind your fingers into his hair. He inhales against your skin and you blink your eyes open, looking down to watch as both your alphas lavish your body. Yunho looks up through the hood of his lashes, his face shiny and wet with your slick, and he shifts to open up your thighs more to his needy mouth.

“Fuck,” Your hips buck, fingers tight against his scalp.

Mingi shifts back up, this time pressing heavily into your space and capturing your mouth, his tongue flicking against yours as he dips you back into the sheets.

“Mmm,” Yunho nods into your core, his tongue pressing inside you as he nestles closer, your clit bumping the bridge of his nose.

Your hips roll, chasing the sensation that has already started to make you dizzy, “Oh, g-god,”

Mingi holds you closer now, your body trembling in his arms, and he strokes your sweat-slick skin, “That’s it,” he coaxes you, “that’s it, omega,”

Your thighs start to shake, and Mingi finds your knee so he can hold you open wide for Yunho’s mouth.

You jerk against him, hips jutting with every spike of pleasure, a blush blooming up your chest and cheeks.

“Ride him,” Mingi coaxes you as your hips roll, “just like that, come on his face,”

Yunho’s hands lock down tight, roughly pulling you a little closer so he can keep working his tongue against you, inside you, sensations exploding everywhere they touch you.

“I’m so fucking close,” You whine, the words running together as sweat breaks across your skin, “P-please,”

”That’s our girl,” Mingi nuzzles into the side of your head, his deep tenor making your brain go fuzzy.

“I’m,” Your eyes screw tightly shut, every movement of your body jerky and uncoordinated but every bump of Yunho’s nose against your clit and his tongue inside you has you right on the perfect precipice, “there, there,”

Yunho stays steady, hearing your need without changing pattern or pressure, and the sudden consistent pulse sends you spiraling.

You come hard, your first orgasm in weeks let alone your first non-heat orgasm with them, and you’re caught fully in the torrent of pleasure with your vision going white and a distinct ringing in your ears.

When you start to come through it, you realize you’re turned to the side, your body completely locked up and you’re gripping Mingi’s arm hard with your nails. He’s rolled close behind you to keep his arms there, but he leans over to see your face.

“So good, wasn’t it?” You catch the end of his sentence, blinking your eyes open and humming in response.

“Yeah,” Yunho’s voice now, and you look down to see him kneeling by your now-closed knees, one broad hand sweeping a line up and down your skin, “there you are,”

“I think you killed me,” You smile wide, tucking your face into the mattress, “you’re talking to a ghost,”

Yunho laughs, and Mingi hums a pleased sound, nuzzling you some more, “Come back over here, gorgeous girl,”

You let him roll you back over into the same position you started in, only this time your body feels like jelly.

“Good?”

“Delicious,” It’s the only word you can think of for how good it all feels.

Yunho nudges your thighs open again and you glance down.

“More?” He grins.

“What about you two?” You’re about halfway through the sentence when Yunho brushes his fingers over your clit again and your words end in a breathy moan.

“We’ve got all night,” Mingi reminds you, “and judging by how hard Yunho is, I think he likes getting you off,”

“Shut up,” Yunho scolds him gently before dropping a warm kiss on your inner thigh, “don’t tell me your dick couldn’t cut glass right now,”

Mingi huffs a laugh, “We have a whiny, desperate, moaning mess of an omega in our bed,” his fingers slide along your side as he talks and you twitch under his hands, “of course I’m hard.”

“Mm,” Yunho kisses up your dripping slit, “baby, why don’t you help him out with that while I take care of you?”

“Y-yeah, yes,” You reach for Mingi, “please, let me help,”

Mingi licks his lips, his hand drifting down to his clothed cock and your eyes flick down to follow. He’s straining against the fabric of his sweatpants, and you clumsily try to open them from your twisted position on the bed for a moment before he stops you.

“Here,” Mingi gets up and shucks off his clothes entirely, settling back down into the same position. He’s achingly hard, the head pink and leaking precum, and you blush at the dirty thoughts that flit through your mind one right after another.

“I can wait,” He offers.

“Fuck,” You shake your head, “I can’t,”

Mingi groans, his hand pumping over his cock once.

“Her mouth,” Yunho suggests between languid licks at your pussy, “trust me,”

You’re nodding before Mingi can even ask if that’s okay, “Please,” you prop yourself up on the bed a little better, “let me taste,”

“Fuck,” Mingi curses.

The three of you move and adjust in tandem until you’re propped at the very edge of the bed for Yunho between your legs, and supported by a pillow behind your shoulder so that you can be slightly turned to the side to reach Mingi where he kneels at your head, his thighs parted wide to drop low and get his cock level with your mouth.

They’re both fully still as you slide forwards, dropping your mouth open and letting the very tip of Mingi’s fat cock pass through your lips and over your tongue.

Mingi moans, and you hum in response.

“You two look perfect,” Yunho murmurs.

“Yeah?” Mingi’s hand brushes over your head, “You hear that, babe? You look perfect sucking my cock,”

You hum around him, taking him deeper into your mouth.

Yunho kisses your mound gently, and you know that’s your warning that he’s about to start again. You gently buck your hips to let him know you’re ready, and he hums softly. Before he starts though, he reaches one hand up and finds where yours is twisted in the sheets, pulling your fingers away so he can hold your hand instead.

He squeezes your hand twice, hard, “If you need air,” he tells you.

You pulse your hand back once to acknowledge his words.

He responds with a sharp thrust of two fingers inside your tight channel and you groan around Mingi’s cock.

“Shit,” Mingi grips you, “jesus, babe,”

Through hooded lashes you look up at him and his jaw tightens, his breath coming in hot exhales through his nose. Whatever you’re doing with your tongue is exactly what he needs and it springs you forwards.

The position isn’t perfect, but it’s close, and so you ignore the little bit of discomfort in your back to give him what he needs. You bob your head back and forth, dragging Mingi’s cock deeper into your warm mouth with every forward sink. He doesn’t direct your movements, but his hand in your hair feels comforting, steady, and makes you want to take him all the more.

“So good,” Mingi pants, “fuck yes, pretty girl,”

Your cunt clenches around Yunho’s fingers and you hear him chuckle between your thighs.

“Ah, ah,” Mingi huffs as you take him further into your throat, “she likes that?”

Yunho lifts his tongue from your clit, “Uh-huh,” he nips a little bite at your inner thigh, “she’s slicking all over my fingers,”

You groan, you didn’t know how they would really be outside of your heat. Heat makes everyone blurry and needy messes, but hearing how filthy they can be on a regular weeknight? No heat, no special occasion, just all of you together? You’re getting dizzy.

“Mm,” Mingi locks his eyes on your face, watching the way you take him nearly to the hilt, “look at you trying to take it all,”

You sink further, ignoring the burn in your jaw and the flickering gag reflex at the back of your throat until your nose is pressed against his pubic bone.

“Jesus f-fuck,” Mingi groans, his head falling back, “that’s it, good fucking girl,”

Yunho’s lips close over your clit again and he sucks hard, ripping a muffled whine from your throat.

“Please,” Mingi begs, and you shiver at the sound of your alpha begging for you, not the other way around.

You pull free from his length and take a deep breath before diving back forwards, this time working him fast and a little sloppy. His fingers tighten up when you tease the head of his cock with the hard tip of your tongue, and his hips jerk every time you slide down about halfway, and with some sort of steady rhythm you double your efforts.

Yunho curses between your legs softly, and then you feel him move, tipping your legs open wider and readjusting his fingers inside you. Your eyes widen when you feel him curl them, locating your spongy g-spot and confirming it with a test jerk of his fingers that sends a shudder through your body as you moan.

He gets the spot right again, and then you’re done for. Between the quick juts of his fingers inside you, repeatedly hitting your sweet spot, and the feeling of his tongue torturing your swollen bud, you don’t have long.

“God,” Mingi pants, “listen to you,”

You’re a wet and whiny mess just like he’s said, only this time your mouth on his cock makes the sound of the room all the more lewd.

“Are you going to come for us again?” Mingi says, voice thready, “Our perfect omega,”

You whine, and you feel Mingi’s cock twitch in your mouth. Everything is foggy and hot, a building knot deep in your core, something bubbling up fast inside you and your hips jerk against Yunho’s fingers.

His thumb brushes the back of your knuckles and your eyes roll back, your orgasm rushing towards you fast.

Mingi’s groaning though, he’s close to spilling himself hot down your throat and when his hips jerk on their own you nod to let him know he can keep going. Falling forwards onto his knees he braces one hand against the mattress and keeps the other rooted in your hair, letting himself rock his hips just enough to drag his length in and out of your lips, over your tongue exactly where he needs the pressure.

”Someday I’m gonna knot that pretty mouth, baby,” He groans.

You moan hard, your back arching up.

Yunho uses your combined hands to push you back down flat to the mattress, and the pressure change has you ready to burst.

There’s so much happening at once, so much sensation pulsing through your body and despite the way that Mingi fucks your face, you’re acutely aware of the warm bubble in your belly dropping low and feeling unlike any orgasm you’ve ever had before.

You whine hard, your head jerking back a little, but Mingi doesn’t pick up on what you need immediately, he’s too close, “I’m gonna come, fuck, I’m g-gonna,”

Yunho takes a sharp breath and then closes his lips over your clit, sucking fast and hard, his fingers pumping firmly at the exact rhythm you need like a metronome counting you through the last beats of your pleasure before the hard crescendo.

Something tightens in your gut, almost painfully and unfamiliar, and you whine harshly again, yanking back from Mingi hard enough that he stutters and lets you go. You fall back into the pillows just as the knot in your gut snaps and you come hot and hard with a staggered cry, arching into Yunho’s mouth as clear fluid starts to pulse from your core.

“Good girl,” He croons, sliding his hand up your wet pussy to rub fast and hard across your clit, prolonging the striking wave, “oh my god, baby, yes, fuck,”

”S-shit,” Mingi falters, his own release ripped away the minute you pulled back, and he makes the neediest whine you’ve ever heard from an alpha in all your life.

You’ll help, you will, as soon as you regain some semblance of which way is up and which is down and use of your arms.

Yunho’s quicker though, he squeezes your hand once before he pulls away, dropping your legs and making sure you’re not going to slide off the bed before he climbs up next to you both.

“You’re alright,” He murmurs, but it’s not to you, and you blink hard to clear the dizzy orgasm away and refocus.

When you turn your head you nearly lose your mind, the sight of your alphas together too good to even have imagined up in your darkest little fantasies. Mingi is still gripping the mattress with one hand and your hair with the other, but Yunho is wrapped behind him and reaching around to work his packmate’s cock with steady, fast strokes.

“F-fuck,” Mingi moans, “h-harder,”

Yunho drops his forehead against Mingi’s broad shoulder and lets his eyes close, picking up the pace of his hand, “Look at her, watch our pretty omega,”

Mingi groans, his eyes blinking open until he finds you.

You reach up, snaking a hand through the tangled mess of arms until you find Mingi’s hard nipple. His eyes widen and he hisses as you pass a thumb over it, shuddering between you both.

“Alpha,” You beg, “come,”

“O-oh my g-,” Mingi chokes as you start to flick his nipple a little more firmly.

”That’s it,” Yunho pants, and you see him looking down at you too, “help him,”

“Mingi,” You whine like you’re starving for him, “come for me, please, please,”

He gasps, hips canting forwards and jerking into Yunho’s fist, holding you steady on the bed as he releases, spurts of milky cum panting your lips, your cheeks, spattering across your naked breasts.

It takes a minute for you all to recover, the only sound in the room the heavy breath shared between you, but you watch as Yunho gently releases Mingi’s softening cock, bracing himself by holding Mingi’s hips for just a moment while he catches his own breath before sliding back and off the bed entirely.

Mingi shifts back, his cheeks and chest flushed pink and the reality of what just happened sinks into you. You have no idea if they’ve ever touched each other before like that, and you all but hold your breath to see where things go from here.

You listen as Yunho pads out of the room and into the connected bathroom, and after a moment of rustling around he returns with two towels. He tosses one down on the floor and you remember suddenly how your own orgasm ended.

”Oh, fuck,” You cover your eyes, “I’m sorry,”

”Don’t be,” Yunho says, “I loved it,”

”Still,” You sigh, “I’ve never done that before,”

Mingi huffs a tiny laugh next to you, and you pull your hand away to look up at him. He smiles a little, “That makes two of us,”

Yunho kneels on the bed, shifting a little closer, and passes the damp end of a towel over all the places you’re still covered in Mingi’s cum. He seems profoundly unaffected by all of it, and you’re a second from asking if he’s okay, but he gets there first.

“Sweetheart,” His gaze is soft and easy, and he looks down at you warmly while he cleans up your cheek, “can I touch your neck?”

You love him.

”Yeah,” You nod, stretching a little so he can reach.

He passes the towel over your throat quickly, “How are you feeling?”

“Really good,” You brush your hand along his arm.

He nods, tossing the towel to the edge of the bed. He looks at you a moment longer, but then he looks up to Mingi and clears his throat, “You good?”

“Yeah,”

You look between them, noticing the unspoken conversation passing between them.

“I hope I didn’t,” Yunho trails off.

“You didn’t,” Mingi promises, “it’s us,”

Yunho sighs, one of his hands coming to rest warmly on your stomach and the other reaching for your other alpha, “Good,”

It’s quiet for a beat, and you need to know where they’re at before you nervously combust.

“Um,” You shift in the sheets until you’re pushing yourself up to a seat with them, “are we… is everything…” you can’t figure out how to ask what you’re asking, so you settle on the only thing that makes sense, “are we good?”

“Of course we are,” Mingi reaches for you, tugging you into his side and pressing a kiss to your lips.

”Sorry,��� Yunho squeezes your thigh, “we didn’t mean to exclude you,”

“No, no,” You shake your head, “that’s between you,”

“No,” Yunho disagrees, “we’re all together, and there should never be any questions or secrets,”

“Mhm,” Mingi agrees, “but like I said, it’s us. It doesn’t have to mean anything, but things have always been different where we’re concerned,” He gestures between himself and Yunho.

“But you’ve never?” You let the implication speak for itself.

Yunho shakes his head.

“We made out in college once,” Mingi says, a laugh on his lips, “but we were pretty drunk and it was for a dare,”

“We weren’t that drunk,” Yunho shrugs.

“Hmm,” You stretch your aching limbs and tangle your fingers with Yunho, “I would have loved to have been there for that,”

Mingi laughs earnestly now and tugs you up into his lap, “I didn’t know you’d be such a horny little mess outside of your heat,”

Your core flutters but you tease him right back, “I’m an omega,” you roll your eyes, “we’re all horny messes,”

“That’s convenient then,” He kisses you, nipping at your lip, “since you have two alphas here who want nothing more than to keep you locked on our knots all day,”

You shiver a little.

“Yunho,” Mingi looks up, “come here,”

Yunho’s body heat envelops you on your left side, and they move you until you’re cradled in both their arms, body spread across their laps while Yunho holds your top half in the crook of his left arm and Mingi supports the rest of you.

They lean against each other, bare shoulder to bare shoulder and your mind starts to wander down the path of all of you together again.

“Maybe you were always meant to be pack,” You point out softly, and their hands still where they stroke your skin.

Yunho nods and looks over to Mingi, “We were fast friends,”

“True,” He murmurs.

Yunho smiles and looks down again, “Maybe we just needed to find you,”

“I forgot how much of a romantic you are,”

He dips down to press a fast kiss to your lips, “One of us should be,”

“I’m not complaining,” You peck his lips quick as he leans back up, “never stop,”

Mingi gives your hip a squeeze, and then he takes Yunho’s hand in his, “Let’s romantically make our girl come again,”

Yunho chuckles, low and warm in his chest, “What do you have in mind?”

You watch as Mingi guides Yunho’s fingers down to your entrance only this time he pushes his own fingers in right alongside. The stretch is sudden and perfect and you moan softly, gripping down on Yunho’s knee.

“Show me how you made her come before,” Mingi’s eyes are glued to your core, “I didn’t get to appreciate it before,”

Yunho grins, “Gladly,”

Your next two orgasms are a blur of sensation, their combined attentions pulling feeling out of you that you didn’t know existed without your heat. Mingi’s lavishing you with his tongue, cleaning you up from the mess you’ve made, when you finally make an overstimulated squeak and push his head away.

“Mm,” He kisses your clit, “fine,”

“If either one of you wants to actually fuck me,” You yawn, “I need a break,”

“Sleep,” Yunho pulls a blanket up and over your body, “we’ll be here when you wake up,”

You’d protest, but it sounds too good now that you’re cocooned in the blanket and buried in the pillows. When Mingi collapses at your other side and you have both of them around you, you drift.

You wake to lazy kisses, sleepy nuzzling from both of them, their hands drifting over your body.

You stretch into it, finding both of them hard and warm and wanting.

“Mm,” Mingi curls over your side, kissing any part of skin he can, “hi, sleepyhead,”

You gasp sharply as his mouth closes over your nipple.

“You were moving around in your sleep,” Yunho’s hand coasts up your thigh as he nudges closer, “bad dreams or good dreams?”

You moan as Mingi sucks a little harder, “No dreams,”

“Needy even asleep?” Mingi teases.

“I,” You start to say, but you feel Yunho’s cock nudging at the apex of your thighs, the head pushing against your clit.

“Fuck,” Yunho sighs, “you’re still wet,”

You shiver, and he pushes his hips forward a little to slide his cock against your slick slit further.

His hands tighten on you and he shudders a sigh into your hair.

“Please,” You part your knees, “no more teasing, I, just, please,”

Mingi shifts away from your back to give you a little space and without hesitation Yunho rolls you. Your legs part open naturally now that you’re on your back.

“Is this okay?” Yunho murmurs, brushing the hair back from your face as he settles above you and in between your splayed knees.

“Mhm,” You soothe him, his nerves evident despite the heat between you all in the room.

“And this?” He asks softly, the velvet head of his cock pressing against your entrance.

“Slow,” You gasp as he starts to push in, and he adjusts his pace. As always, his size dwarfs you, and it takes you time to adjust. In heat it’s easy to take an alpha’s cock with almost no preparation, your body producing enough slick and your muscles adjusting so that days of sex and knotting don’t feel so difficult.

Outside of heat you can take it too, but it’s not as quick and simple.

Your eyes flutter shut, focusing on the stretch of it, the ache, the way your channel seems to resist and then give way to him in the most warm and dizzying pleasure.

“Sweetheart,” He whispers, “are you with me?”

“Mhm,” You look back up at him, “you feel incredible.”

He sighs, relief in his eyes, and with one more careful push he seats himself fully inside you.

“You feel,” You shiver, words dying on your lips.

He smiles as he lowers himself down, resting an elbow on either side of your head and lacing one hand in your hair, “How do I feel, little omega?”

Your muscles flutter and clench around him and you sigh, “Big, it’s… god it’s so much more than when I was in heat,”

“No pain?”

“No,” You let your fingers stroke up and down the length of his back.

“Good,” He hums, dipping down to kiss you tenderly, “because you’re perfect, you feel perfect around me,”

His tongue dips into your mouth this time, a soft kiss turns needy, and slowly he starts to move, thrusting his hips shallowly just to get you used to the sensation.

Mingi shifts to rest close to you both, his fingers running up and down your arm softly, and you reach for him to twine your fingers together as you watch Yunho watching you.

“Yunho,” you breathe, “baby,”

You can feel the emotion rolling off him in waves, the tenderness as he presses himself deeper into you.

“Sweetheart,” His fingers brush along your cheek, “I, god, I,”

“I know,” your head falls back, and you grip Mingi’s hand.

Yunho picks up the pace slightly, a little faster and a little more with each stroke and he shudders when he hears a sharp moan, “Good?”

“Please, don’t stop,” You beg him, gripping down onto his shoulder with your free hand.

He adjusts your bodies, pressing over yours so that your hips rock with his in a rolling rhythm, and his lips capture yours. His warm breath, the pressure of him above you, waves of sensation as you breathe in his warm, safe scent.

You’re creeping up to the edge of an orgasm, but you feel him shudder above you before he moans against your mouth and you pull him tight to you.

“Please,” you moan, “Yunho please,”

“Say it,” he whispers, “tell me,”

The words spill out of you, “Baby, I, god, I love you,”

His hips slow and he meets your eyes, absolute tender adoration rolling off him in waves when he replies, “I love you so much,”

“I missed you,” You confess, a sudden rush of emotion through your chest and tears pricking at your eyes. Blinking hard you look to the side to find Mingi and squeeze his hand, “I missed you both. I love you both,”

Mingi’s expression crumbles and he presses forwards to kiss you, his lips connecting to yours with intensity, his free hand against your face, a sigh on his lips when he leans back. His thumb brushes along your cheekbone, his eyes misty, “You’re our omega, our mate,” he corrects, “we’re never letting go of you again.”

“Mingi,” You soften.

“I love you,” He replies, kissing the back of your hand.

When Mingi slides back a little further, you look back to Yunho and see that he's frozen still above you, watching you both with warmth. When you meet his eyes, a small smile plays across his mouth, “Can you take more, baby?”

Your body jerks gently against him, just the implication that he would fuck you earnestly making your mind dizzy, and all you can do is nod, “Yes, yes,”

He rocks back down on you in an instant, gathering you as close as he can while he fucks you soft, meeting your mouth and saying everything he needs to in the kiss. All the apologies, the amends, he pours it all into this until he hears you whining beneath him, arcs of pleasure spiking up your spine with every deep roll of his pelvis against your clit and push of his cock in deeper.

“Like that?” He pants against your cheek.

“Don’t you dare stop,” You arch against him, holding him tightly to you as you let him move.

Something about the slow steady pressure he’s applying is making you careen back up to the top of pleasure. There’s a time and a place for hard and deep, but this? This has you melting into his hands in a way you’d never have expected and your legs quiver as you try to hitch your calves on his hips to give him a deeper angle.

“C-close?” He manages.

You nod, twisting your head to the side to catch his mouth again.

“Mm,” He groans against your mouth, “I can feel it,”

Your fingers tighten on him.

“Fuck,” He curses, his movements staying controlled and slow, firm but not too fast.

Tears gather in your eyes, the way the bubble is building inside of you is almost painfully good, and heat spreads over every inch of your skin before concentrating hot on your core. You feel the bed shift, and without looking you know Mingi is close by, all of your scents mingling together now in a way that bubbles emotion deep in your chest.

You think that this is what people mean when they say making love.

Your back arches, fingers digging into him, tears spill over your temples and into your hair as you let your head rock back, “Alpha,” you whine.

Yunho moans above you, and he mutters something on his lips but you can barely hear it.

This time when your neck stretches long and open to them, you know they won’t hurt you. Mingi’s hand slides underneath to cup the top of your neck and the base of your head, his fingers mingling with Yunho’s in your hair.

“We’re here, omega,” Mingi murmurs low, “let go for us,”

A tight strained noise bubbles from your lips as the feeling builds.

“You’re safe,” Mingi soothes.

Yunho shudders a moan, and you feel the slow swell of his knot starting to bump against your slick hole. He’s desperately close but holding on as best he can for you to get there first.

Mingi directs his next words away from your ear, “Don’t stop, she’s nearly,”

Yunho makes a noise, and you feel his fingers grip down.

It hits you like a snap of fire, your limbs a shaking mess, and you cry out sharply and twist beneath them in the sheets, pleasure overtaking you until you think you may not be able to take a second more.

“Shh,” one of your alphas says, but you’re too far gone to know which.

You’re a mess, the orgasm seemingly never-ending, and you can feel the hot tears and hear the way you’re sobbing in pleasure but it’s disconnected and floaty.

Yunho’s hips start to slow and then you start to feel him pull back entirely and something deep inside you panics.

Snapping forward you wrap your arms harder around him and pull him back down, your brain too fuzzy to say anything more coherent than, “Knot,” you beg, “please,”

He folds back over you, shifting your hips up and open wider, and though you can see the brief flicker of hesitation in his eyes he starts to snap his hips harder into you, the steady click of your wet skin against his the only clear sound in the room.

His cock spearing you open is so much sensation you can’t focus on anything else, every connection of your bodies and kiss of his skin pushing an overstimulated moan from your lips.

Yunho’s close now, his hands tight, breath thready, and he gathers you closer to his chest until you’re cupped against his breastbone.

“S-she,” He chokes.

“She’s alright,” Mingi assures him, his hand still warm against your back.

He’s scared for you, still so concerned about hurting you or being too much for you, especially out of your heat and especially after everything. He doesn’t understand that this kind of need, this want for each other so wholly is healing parts of you that you didn’t know were broken.

You tug him closer, kiss his chest where’s you’re cradled, “Yunho,” you whine, “knot me, b-baby knot me, come,”

He collapses, hips thrusting hard and then you feel the sudden push of something wide, the stretch as it locks inside, and then the warm sensation of his release filling you.

Yunho’s still panting hot against your skin when you feel Mingi shift, pushing Yunho back from your body so he can see you. He finds your chin, pulling your face up gently to meet his.

Yunho responds too, the head rush of his own release fading enough that he can focus and his hands smooth back your damp hair, “Are you alright?” His voice is shaky, “Sweetheart, did I hurt you?”

“God, no,” You breathe.

Mingi slides down in the sheets while still gingerly holding your chin, trying to get a good look at your eyes, “Babe?”

“Hmm,” You blink, finding his face more clearly, “hey,”

“Hey,” He smiles, but you can still see an anxiety in him.

“What’s wrong?” Your head is finally starting to clear enough for you to realize that they don’t seem relaxed in post-coital bliss, they seem stressed.

He shakes his head a little, lost for something to say, but his wide hand slides up and his thumb brushes along your cheekbone to your temple, “You’re crying,” he murmurs, “you were crying,”

“I’m okay,” You shake your head, “I’m more than okay, I’m… it was so good, it was,”

Mingi sighs heavily, his head dropping to rest on your shoulder, “Oh fuck,”

Yunho presses a hard kiss to your forehead as he exhales his own relief against your hair. His knot starts to soften, and your hips naturally start to shift away to separate you, but with Yunho heavy above you it’s impossible.

“Easy,” He murmurs against your skin, and you hear him breath in sharply in a way that sounds like he’s pushing back his own tears, “let me,”

It takes a moment, but as soon as his knot is down enough he slides out of your slick channel. He drops to the side of the bed that Mingi isn’t occupying and drags up one of the blankets to cover the three of you.

Mingi stretches out beside you too, and in a moment you’re cuddled between them.

“Closer,” You tug them in. After that, you need to be absolutely enveloped in them.

They both shift in until all of your legs are tangled together, and Mingi brushes your cheeks again, “Babe,”

“I promise,” You reach up to brush away any lingering wetness under your eyes, “it was just overwhelming, but in the best way. I can’t explain,”

“It was,” Yunho agrees softly.

“I just,” You feel another bubble of emotion as you recall it, trying to understand how to articulate it, “it’s like I could feel you both so much closer, more than I could for my heat, more than…. I don’t know, I just realized that you’re really mine. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I…”

Yunho shakes his head, “We’re the ones who can’t believe we have you,”

You twist in the bed, wrapping your arms around Yunho and hugging him close, “I love you,” you kiss his lips, his cheek, “thank you for taking care of me,”

He softens, “Always,”

“I didn’t mean to scare you,” You need him to understand, “but you made me feel so loved and so safe,”

Your hand reaches back to find Mingi so you can tug him closer still and he slides up to your back and wraps an arm around the two of you.

“Both of you,” You hold them close, “no one’s ever made me feel like this,”

Mingi nods against you.

You hold each other close, breathing in the same air for a few moments, no one willing to rush the comedown when it was as emotional as it was. You stretch long in the bed between them to ease the sensation back into all your limbs and Yunho’s eyes darken, flicking down to take in your naked body again.

He’s half hard again by the time you’ve relaxed into the sheets and you smile.

Mingi’s fingers stroke up and down the smooth plane of your abdomen, light enough to tickle.

“Again?” You ask, a little breathless.

“Mhm,” Mingi draws his hand down lower, teasing just a little with the tips of his fingers.

“God,” You shiver.

Yunho nods, “Definitely again,”

“Mm,” Mingi rolls his fingers over your clit, “next heat, we’ll both fuck you together, wouldn’t that be perfect, pretty girl?”

A distinct flicker of need passes through you at his words. You do want that. You want it so bad you shudder and moan, your fingers digging into Yunho’s chest.

You shake your head and push Mingi’s arm away, “We should try,”

“What, now?” For the first time you see him truly caught off guard.

“Please,” You nod, “we don’t need to wait, I want you both,”

Yunho’s hand smooths up and down your arm, “It might be too much,”

“So then we stop,” You counter.

Mingi wets his lips, thinking it through and then he nods, “I’m not knotting your ass,”

You blush.

“Today,” He adds, “but, okay, let’s try.”

“Who do you want where, baby?” Yunho’s fingers trace your jaw lightly.

“Um,” You look between them, a little dizzy at how quickly they agreed, how immediately this is about to happen, “I’m not sure,”

Yunho looks up, “You take her ass,”

Your core clenches and Mingi smiles at the blush in your cheeks.

“Sweetheart,” Yunho rolls onto his back, “come right up here,”

Slowly you ease one leg over and settle yourself over his cock. You’re still dripping with slick and Yunho’s last release, and it makes the slide easy as you sink down and bury him right back where he belongs.

He exhales sharply, “Perfect,”

Mingi leans back, finding the bedside table and pulling out the drawer, searching for the lube he knows is there that he’s definitely going to need with you not in heat. When he comes back he’s still sitting next to you and Yunho but he faces you, and you’re about to ask why he’s not already behind you when he cracks open the top of the lube and applies some to his index and middle fingers.

“Oh,” You breathe softly.

He slides closer on his knees now and reaches around you, “Lean forward a little on Yunho,”

You do just as he asks, and Yunho brings his hands up to brace you at the ribs, making sure that he’s supporting you from below.

“Babe,” He kisses your shoulder, “outside of the heat with us, have you ever done this?”

His fingers slide slowly over the tight ring of muscle and you twitch, “Been d-double penetrated?”

Mingi laughs at your description and Yunho smiles up at you. Mingi shakes his head, “No, has anyone ever touched you here?”

He presses with his finger but doesn’t push in and heat floods up your belly, “Mm-mm” you manage.

“Have you ever played with yourself like this?” He finally starts to push in a digit and you gasp, “Ever put anything inside?”

“N-no,” You moan as he presses his finger in deeper.

“I thought so,” Mingi murmurs, “we need to take our time,”

“I can do it,” You insist, the idea that you might not get what you want after he teases you like this is actually torturous.

“Of course you can,” Yunho cups your cheek, “you’re our omega,”

Your cunt flutters and clenches around his cock.

Mingi withdraws his finger and this time when he presses back in, it’s with two.

Yunho strokes your skin softly, lazily drawing a line from your chest to belly and back up, “Our mate,” he adds, “you were made to take us,”

Your hips cant forwards, pushing down on Yunho’s pelvic bone for any amount of pressure and stimulation on your aching bud.

He groans, “God,”

Mingi pumps his fingers slowly.

Yunho refocuses your eyes on his, “We know you can take us both,” he offers, “but I think what Mingi is saying is that if you’ve never done anything like that, especially regularly, we need to go slow and prep you.”

“Oh,” You relax a little.

“Mhm,” Mingi dips his head and you turn to meet his mouth in a kiss, “just let us make you feel good first,”

“Okay,” You breathe against his lips.

“Yunho,” Mingi murmurs, not drawing his face away from yours.

“Yes,” Yunho hums, and he slides his hand lower.

“Come here,” Mingi sweeps his free hand up and down your arm, and you twist to wrap them around his shoulders, “good girl,”

Your hips roll at his praise.

He finds your lips again, but this time it feels like everything is in slow motion. He worships your mouth with hot, lazy kisses, his tongue against yours and his nose nuzzling into you. The kind of kissing people don’t have time for unless they’re exploratory teenagers or intentional tantric lovers. He gets you used to the slowness, all the while his fingers a still, solid weight inside you.

Yunho’s hands match the pace perfectly, his ability to read the scene and you both uncanny, and all he does is tease. His hands squeeze, slow and firm across your sweat slick skin. Thighs, hips, waist, a tantalizing squeeze to your soft belly. He finally reaches your mound but doesn’t do anything, just rests his hot hand at the top of your cunt and waits.

You’re panting against Mingi’s mouth, lost in the hazy array of their bodies and yours, no concept of what time it is or how many times you’ve really come so far, it’s just you and your alphas and this bed. You push up a little higher on your knees as the kisses get headier, and you hear Yunho hum beneath you, his cock physically twitching and throbbing in your hot channel.

With the slight position adjustment, both of your boys take the opportunity to change the playing field. In tandem they move, Yunho slides two fingers under you, one on either side of your clit and where his cock spears you open, and he just presses ever so slightly to increase the pressure. Mingi slowly pumps his fingers again, this time pushing into your ass noticeably deeper and separating his fingers on each thrust a little wider to start to scissor you open.

You’re trembling, that much is obvious from the way your thighs quiver, and you whine against the cushion of Mingi’s lips, the sound swallowed by his own hungry groan.

You feel Mingi’s free hand slide away from your upper back and he taps Yunho’s chest twice.

“Mhm,” He acknowledges softly.

You break the kiss, your forehead on Mingi’s, “Baby,”

Your words are swallowed up though, he dives in again for another kiss but this time they move their hands with purpose. Mingi pumps harder, a third finger squeezing inside and Yunho’s fingers slide up and press down perfectly over your slick clit. He rolls his fingers at a steady, even pace and pressure as Mingi opens you up further to him.

Hot pleasure spikes up your body and you moan hard, gripping down on Mingi’s shoulders.

“There you go,” Yunho says, his voice tight and low, “good girl, fuck yourself on my cock,”

You didn’t even know you were doing it, your mind so hazy with sensation but he’s right, your body started moving on its own, sinking up and down just enough on Yunho’s thick length that you could imagine both of them taking you properly.

“Oh, fuck,” Yunho curses, “look at you slicking all over me,”

You whine.

“So horny from Mingi playing with your pretty ass?” His voice husky.

“Oh!” You squeak as hot sensation spikes up your body, and you slip away from Mingi’s mouth to bury your face into his shoulder.

“Oh, yes,” Mingi groans holding you close with one hand while he fucks into you with the other, “so fucking tight, baby,”

“Fuck,” You cry.

“You really think you can take my cock?” He teases, scissoring his fingers again

You nod, whining, words completely inaccessible.

“She’s our girl,” Yunho praises, “aren’t you, baby?”

You choke out a moan.

“Say it,” Mingi prompts.

“I,” You shudder, jutting down with your hips to force more of Yunho inside you, “yes, I’m your girl,”

Mingi’s hot voice at your ear is your undoing, “Is our girl close?”

Your nails dig into Yunho’s chest.

“Is our girl going to come?” He nips at your ear and you see stars.

Your body jerks against Yunho, the slick drag of your clit against his fingers where they still press, trapped between your body and his, and Mingi grunts in your ear as he pushes his hand harder and faster. You tear into your orgasm with a scream, a cord snapping in your belly and leaving your body shaking from head to toe, and Yunho shifts you up and lets his cock spring free so he can stimulate you through the end, wetness coating your thighs from where you released again.

You whine when it starts to feel like overstimulation, and Yunho stops, his warm hand coming to cup your cunt as Mingi’s fingers slide out of your channel.

“Shh,” Mingi pets your back, “oh, baby, you’re okay, we got you.”

You’re a babbling mess, not even really conscious of what you’re saying until the arcs of pleasure fade and you’re left boneless and held between them.

Yunho hums appreciatively, “Incredible,”

“Uh-huh,” You agree weakly.

Mingi strokes you more, kissing your head, “You’re still shaking,” he squeezes you like he can’t get enough.

Blinking hard, the stars start to clear and you lift your head a little, “Did we make a mess?”

Yunho laughs, “Fuck yes we did,”

You ease yourself off of Mingi’s shoulders and he helps settle you to a seat straddling Yunho again, “Fuck, the sheets,”

“Are made for heats,” Yunho dismisses, “they’ll be fine, it’s not the last time we’ll be making you squirt,”

“Tonight,” Mingi chuckles, “if we’re lucky,”

“Fuck,” You shiver and laugh, brushing your hair back and shaking your head.

“What?” Mingi pokes you.

“I just didn’t expect you two to be so…” You can’t put your finger on it.

“So?” Yunho’s brows furrow.

You’ve had plenty of sex, some of it you would have considered very good sex, but this? It’s another level of pleasure and need that you didn’t know existed. It could be your scent match, it could just be them and how compatible you are together, but there’s no question that it’s distinctly different and distinctly better.

You search for the right words but land on, “Feral?” You smile, “Maybe?”

“There’s no use in being anything else when it’s us,” Mingi says matter of factly.

An ache settles inside you. Any shame you had about sex at all dissipates in your mind and you smile, “You’re right,” you move forward on Yunho’s thighs, “now will you please both fuck me?”

You sink back down on Yunho’s cock in one fluid motion and he moans, his hips jerking up into the cradle of your hips.

“Hi, baby,” You grind down to take every little inch.

“Hi,” He’s breathless, an almost dopey pleasured grin on his face.

“Mm,” You sigh, enjoying the deep warmth of his cock inside you, “you feel so fucking good,”

“Yeah?”

You nod, “I want you inside me all the time,”

“That can be arranged,” He chuckles, reaching up to draw you down closer to his chest, locking his lips on yours.

You hum warmly against him, rolling your hips softly, “You can have me anytime,”

His hands tighten on your arms, “Careful, baby,”

“You’d like that?” You tease him, nipping at his lip, “Sliding inside me whenever you want,”

He groans and uses his firm hands to stop any amount of movement, “If you want Mingi to be included in this at all, you need to stop with that mouth,”

“Fine, fine,” You concede and you settle down, you’ll just torture him another time since it seems like teasing him is a sure fire way to get him to lose his mind.

Mingi’s hand strokes your back and you glance over to him as he locates the bottle of lube and starts shuffling towards you both again on his knees.

“Ready?” He asks.

“I’ve been ready,” You didn’t mean to sound so needy, but you are and it’s obvious.

“Mhm,” Mingi murmurs, and then he’s sliding behind you.

He straddles Yunho’s legs, fully situated with his hips right behind yours, and you listen as the bottle opens and then closes, the wet sound of his hand slicking up his cock with lube.

“Tell me if you need to slow down,” Yunho murmurs, pressing a kiss to your lips, “I’m not moving until he’s in, okay?”

Nerves bubble through you suddenly, “Okay,”

The sound of him shifting on the sheets behind you spikes anxiety up your spine.

A heavy hand settles on one hip and your stomach tightens. Another passes up and down your spine and your breath feels suddenly tight and thready. His hand anchors on your shoulder for a moment, the tips of his fingers startlingly close to your pulsepoint and your heart starts to flutter faster.

You know it’s Mingi, of course it is. Yunho’s here in front of you, and that means it couldn’t be anyone but Mingi behind you, but something about your already heightened nerves at the new experience and the inability to see him has you scared.

Yunho’s studying your face, a second away from realizing where you are, but you pump the brakes first.

“Wait, stop,” You manage.

The hands on your body lift off.

You’re breathing a little faster than you should, your heart hammering in your chest.

“Hard stop?” Yunho asks quietly.

You shake your head and swallow back some of the sudden fear, “Mingi?”

“I’m here,” He assures.

You sigh, relief flooding through you and you let your head drop down onto Yunho’s chest.

“It’s me,” He soothes you, realizing immediately where your mind had gone, “it’s me and it’s Yunho, okay?”

“Yeah,” You exhale and nod, “I know, I just… for a second,”

It’s quiet for a moment, but then Mingi says, “Babe?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I touch you, or should we stop?” He’s so careful, so tender. Distantly you remember the moment in the locker room all those months ago, the way he had carefully protected you when he found you in heat, vulnerable and alone. The two men around you have done nothing but protect you, care for you, and seek not just consent but need from you before anything and everything you’ve done together and that realization makes your body soften.

“Yeah,” You reply, “you can, I’m okay,”

You expect his hands back on your hips, but instead you feel a hand on top of yours where you cling to Yunho, and then another on your opposite, Mingi’s fingers threading together with yours.

You blink your eyes open and stare at your combined hands. You know him, you know these hands. You study his rings, the silver ones he always wears, and the little scar on the side of his thumb.

“It’s me,” He gently strokes your finger with his thumb.

“Hi,” You breathe.

“Can you sit up for me?” He asks and you nod.

Both of them draw you up to a sitting position, still angled forwards a little over Yunho but this time where you brace Yunho’s chest, Mingi’s hands cover yours, fingers still intertwined.

“Look at Yunho,” Mingi shifts closer to your back, kissing your shoulder, “and I’m right here.” He punctuates his words with a squeeze to your hands.

“We’ve got you,” Yunho murmurs, “we’re here,”

“I’m ready,” You echo the sentiment from before, but this time you actually are.

Mingi drops his lips to your shoulder again and kisses you, “Just relax, breathe into it,”

The slippery head of his cock nudges your entrance.

Yunho reaches around your bodies and assists, helping to guide Mingi’s cockhead inside you while his hands are busy.

It’s nothing startling at first, just a bit of pressure and not unlike his fingers from before, but when the head of him catches inside, and Yunho drops back, then you start to feel it.

Pressure blooms into a stretch, unlike anything you’ve ever felt before, and you gasp.

“How do I feel, babe?” Mingi’s got to be holding himself steady with so much control.

“Good,” You manage, “it’s so…”

He pushes his hips forward a little more, opening you up as his cock starts to thicken.

“Fuck,” You squeeze his hands.

“Good?” He checks again.

You nod, but Yunho smiles below you, “You should see her face,” he murmurs.

“I knew it,” Mingi pushes in more, “I knew you could take us,”

You moan sharply, the heat of them both an insane combination that pushes any thought out except for the sensation between your legs.

“God,” Yunho finally groans beneath you, “are you in?”

“A-almost,” Mingi sighs hot against your skin, “j-just a little more,”

A little more? You can’t even imagine, but he thrusts a little more sharply this time to seat himself fully and you grip down on his hands. It burns a little, but fades just as fast as it comes, and now all you can feel is the tremendous fullness of the weight of them together inside you.

“This is,” You blink looking down and seeing Yunho’s pelvis pressed against yours, Mingi’s thighs caging you in from behind, “I d-don’t even know,”

Mingi shifts forwards a little, mostly to adjust his position but it pushes him the smallest amount deeper and you moan sharply. Yunho hisses beneath you, his hips pulsing just once and you feel the way his hands grip down hard on your plush thighs.

“Can you feel him?” You manage.

“Yeah,” Yunho pants, “it’s… this is insane,”

“I’m,” Mingi sighs against your back, “I need a second,”

“Too good?” Yunho smiles.

“Just…” Mingi grips your hands, “nobody move, I’ll come way too fast,”

Filled to the brim like this you’re desperate to move though, it’s all you want to do. You all stay as steady as you can, just the sound of each other’s heavy breaths as you all get your bearings, but in the end you start to move first.

With the smallest shift, you rock your hips once, grinding them further into you and against each other through the thin wall inside you, and you moan.

Mingi jerks.

“Please,” You murmur into the hushed room.

Yunho looks up to Mingi behind you and nods, “Slow,”

They move in sync, a slow drag out and push back in and after two strokes you think you’ll be addicted to them fucking you like this.

“Y-yes,” You roll back with your hips, fucking back into them, “more,”

Mingi drops his lips to your back and uses the position adjustment to snap his hips harder, “You need more?”

A spark of hot pleasure echoes through you and you whine, “Anything, do anything you want, just fuck me,”

“Good girl,” Yunho hums beneath you, and you feel him adjust his legs and brace his hands on the bed.

Your soul quite possibly leaves your body the second they start fucking you in earnest. All you can do is hold onto them now, both of their cocks stretching you open with every quick pulse of their hips. None of you are going to last long at this rate but you really don’t care.

“Oh, god,” You collapse lower onto Yunho’s chest, still gripping Mingi’s hands to ground yourself.

“You’re so fucking tight, omega,” Yunho groans, gritting his teeth.

“And warm,” Mingi nearly growls.

“Wet,” Yunho moans.

Your mind is dizzy and hazy and full of pleasured pops.

Yunho’s hand cups your cheek, drawing your unfocused eyes down to his. He’s checking you, you can see that, but the moment you smile he nods like he’s praising you, “How do we feel, jagi?”

“So good,” You whine, grinding down and back and pushing into the sensation, “I’m so fucking full,”

Mingi chokes out a moan behind you.

“That’s our girl,” Yunho nods again and thrusts a little harder.

A shudder of hot warmth echoes up through your body and you know you’re blushing hard for them, slick with sweat and need.

“Say it,” Mingi groans, “say you’re ours,”

“I’m all fucking yours,” The words come out in a rush, “I’m your omega,”

His hips stutter and you’re all starting to lose your grip. He pushes a little too hard, and you both collapse forwards. You’re a tangle of limbs now, your face pressed up against Yunho’s throat, Mingi pressed into every inch of your back. Two of your hands are still clasped together and bracing the bed above, but the other two have separated and you hold tight to Yunho with your free hand while Mingi holds your hip with his.

They both haven’t stopped despite the position change, both of them needy and close themselves, rutting into you again and again.

“Fuck,” You curse, a roll of pleasure up your body, “alpha, please,”

“Come,” Yunho chokes, “come on our cocks, baby,”

It slams into you, his words as good as a command when you fall apart into shaking moans, pleasure washing through you.

“That’s,” Yunho starts to say, but at the sensation of your walls clenching down around him he loses all control and thrusts up hard, his knot locking firmly in place as he pumps rope after rope of hot cum inside you. He’s shuddering too, an overstimulated hiss as Mingi keeps fucking into you.

“So tight,” Mingi breathes hot against your spine, “my perfect girl,”

“Oh, Mingi,” You grip his hand, pressing your eyes closed as your body is worked over, “baby, please,”

He sucks in a sharp breath, pulling free from your body with a whine, and you hear him stroke desperately fast until he knots in his hand and spills his release across your skin, painting your backside until it drips down your cunt to where you’re still locked together with Yunho.

You feel euphoric, an almost drug induced haze of bliss, and you nuzzle into Yunho’s throat to press little kisses along his gland, your tongue darting out to taste his scent.

He shivers under you, “Feeling good, baby?”

“Mhm,” Rich, wet earth, the crackling of air before a storm. You worm your way closer to him, breathing him in.

Mingi’s hand untangles from yours and he shifts himself back from the both of you to grab a towel and come back to bed.

“Shh,” Yunho murmurs, his knot softening so he can pull himself free, “it’s okay,”

You didn’t even notice you had whined to keep him inside, and you’re not in heat, but something about the experience felt transcendental and you’re not even bonded yet.

Mingi drops a towel over the bed and they both ease you over so you can lay on your back, but you pull Mingi down, needing to settle yourself more, “Alpha,”

“Hey,” He starts but you yank him down and snuggle into his neck too, soaking in the rich cocoa of his scent, “whoa, hey,” he laughs.

You lap a stripe up his throat and he sighs, his body softening delightfully under your touch.

“What’s this?” He murmurs, stroking your skin.

“Need you,” You explain, and that’ll have to be enough.

You move then on instinct, your omega close to the surface now as you seek out what you truly need. With a hand laced in Mingi’s hair you direct him, pushing his head down while you stretch your neck long, and setting his mouth directly over your gland.

You’re not afraid.

He hesitates, breathing you in for a moment, and then you murmur a please.

Mingi’s tongue traces your neck as he drinks in your scent, his kisses slow and reverent over your mating gland.

You reach up and find Yunho, not feeling complete until you have them both.

“You need me too?” Yunho settles at your side.

“Please,”

Mingi makes space until you’re flat on the bed with your head back, neck bared to them both. They scent you slowly, deliberately and with delicious care. They kiss your neck and suck softly at your pulse points, they drink you in until your head starts to clear. They scent you until there could be no question who you belonged to and whose bed you come back to every night.

You tumble into sleep just the same, your alphas on either side of you, bodies wrapped up so closely together you don’t know whose skin is whose, their lips softly at your throat, whispering their love like a prayer .

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Code of Conduct 1

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as cheating, noncon/dubcon, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: your boss has a difficult time keeping his personal life from bleeding into his work. 

Characters: Steve Rogers, this reader is known as Rosie.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself💜

💼Part of the Bad Bosses AU💼

“Mr. Rogers’ office. This is Rosie, how can I hel--” 

“Where is he?” Peggy’s voice cuts over your own. 

“Oh, hello, Mrs. Rogers, he’s currently in a meeting--” 

“Get him.” 

“Mrs.--” 

“Don’t argue with me. Go get him. Are you not his assistant?” She challenges brusquely. 

Her accent adds to the sharpness of her words. Her curt demeanour is a stark contrast to her husband. Your boss is always amiable, accommodating even, but the few times you’ve dealt with his wife have been similarly tense. You put a smile on so she can’t hear your anxiety. 

“Of course, Mrs. Rogers,” you preen, “I’ll put you on a quick hold.” 

“No, you will get him. No hold.” 

You suck in a sigh and hold your breath in your chest, “of course.” 

You set the phone down. You don’t see how her hearing your desktop will be any better but you wouldn’t want to irritate her further. It must be urgent. 

You stand and smooth out your dress. You step out from behind your desk, digging your nails into your palms as you ball your fists tight. You get nervous about most things. Answering the phone took your months to get used to and even now you tend to fumble over your words. 

You go to the door and brace yourself. You don’t know why you expect Mr. Rogers to be upset. He’s never been anything close to rude. Maybe short in times of stress but not unpleasant. You knock and wait as you twiddle your fingers against your striped pleats. 

It isn’t Mr. Rogers who answers by Mr. Barnes. You give a sheepish smile, “excuse me, doll.” 

He steps past you and you bid him a good day. He leaves without further courtesy and Mr. Rogers calls your name from within, “need something?” He asks. 

“Oh, yes, Mrs. Rogers is on the phone.” 

He doesn’t seem happy about that. His cheek dimples and he nods, wiggling his pen at you, “patch her through.” 

You go back to your desk and pick up the receiver, “hello, Mrs. Rogers, he’s available now--” 

“I don’t want to talk to you, honey. Where is my husband?” 

You transfer her without another word. Phew. You almost feel bad for your boss as you hear him pick up in his office. His tone is low and dull. 

You try not to overhear, letting his conversation drone into a buzz. There’s enough work to be done without worrying about his personal life. Your own afterhours concerns are more than concerning. You wouldn’t say you have much going on and that’s the problem. It’s moment like those that ease your envy of others’ full plates. 

You haven’t seen the girls lately. The group chat’s been quiet but you suppose you could go ahead and say hi. Your weekly cocktails petered out to biweekly, then monthly, and now you can’t remember the last time you let go with a mimosa. 

You peek over your desk and back at your screen. It’s not only on them to keep things going. You pick up your phone and open the chat. The last message is a meme Elfie sent about printers. You shake your head and send a little waving sticker, keying in a message. 

‘Long time no see! I’m in need of drinks. Anyone free? When’s best? Hope you’re all taking care.’ 

You’re professional tone shines through even on WhatsApp. It’s a bit lame but you’re an entirely different person in text. Most people are surprised to meet the mousy secretary hiding behind her screen after the lively back and forth in Outlook. 

You set your phone down and try not to stare at it. A reply never comes while you’re waiting for it, nor does water boil when you’re watching it. As you click around and try to remember where you were, the silence sinks in. Your realisation brings your eyes up as quickly as Mr. Rogers shadow. 

You bat your lashes at him in surprise, “need something, sir?” 

He gives a half-smile, the type weighed down by disappointment. He sighs and crosses his arms, leaning on the door frame, “you hungry?” 

“Um, well, it’s only eleven,” you shrug. 

“Mm, yeah,” he unfolds one arm to rub his neck, “I’m restless. You feel like getting lunch early?” 

“Sure, I can run out and grab you something,” you stand eagerly. 

“No, uh,” he drops his arm back over his other, “together. I had a reservation for me and Peggy but she canceled. I’d hate to inconvenience the restaurant and I just can’t sit and mope in my office.” 

“Oh, okay, I guess that works...” 

“Do you need to ask your boss?” He scoffs. 

You laugh at his joke, “do I?” 

He smiles, a real smile and drops his arms, “my treat. You know what, you earned it. You work so hard around here, a little employee appreciation is overdue.” 

“That’s so nice,” you chime, “uh, sir, I... I should leave an away message, should I?” 

“Oh, who cares, come on.” 

“Well, I mean...” 

“Ah, I get it, boss is a real hard ass,” he winks. 

“Sir,” you giggle nervously and teethe your lip. He watches your mouth. 

“You can catch up later. Come on, I haven’t played hooky in years.” 

“Hooky?” You stammer. 

He laughs, “a goody two shoes. It’s why I hired you but it’s okay to let loose once in a while.” 

“I know, Mr. Rogers, it’s just... it’s work.” 

“Too much of it and you’ll turn into me,” he huffs. “Please, I’m sure your husband would hate if you were never home. Never answered the phone.” 

“If I had one, probably,” you blurt out then look away shyly. 

“Really? I thought...” he begins and shakes his head, “doesn’t matter. I’ll grab my jacket and we’ll go. I missed breakfast.” 

“Um, sure, sir,” you agree and put your hand on the phone. 

When he turns, you look down. Missie sent a reply; ‘please, drinks are required!’ Ooh! Yay. 

[losergames]

Chop Shop is strictly 18+ for language, themes, and potential explicit content. 

🔗 - Game Intro | Bug Report | Ko-Fi

Episode Three is now available! (+ 86,000) - PLAY HERE

Get your first taste of the underground car scene.

Meet some other players in the game.

Be made an offer.

5 achievements up for grabs!

And more!

AN: thank you so much for the patience - i've been dying to put this update out. lots of new characters and lots of variation!! there are 3 major paths to choose between in this ep, i recommend trying them all out! and thank you to my betas for keeping me sane lmao

This update comes with a patch and UI refresh (Version 1.1.2) Notes are under the cut. If preferred, you can access them in game in the start menu.

STORY

EPISODE 01:

MC should now be able to smoke! Buying cigarettes at the shop was not triggering correctly. If playing with an old save, you DO NOT have to restart as code at the beginning of EP 03 has resolved the error. Player will need to restart if they wish to read smoking related scenes in previous episodes.

Updated MC Name selection. Player can now choose from a list of names instead of having to input one to proceed.

Player can now give Taha their chocolate bar if it's in their inventory.

When asking Maz about their scars, the second choice 'You want to ask about it but you're going to keep your mouth shut.' should now take you to the correct response.

Extended and updated 'End Game' scenes.

EPISODE 02:

If MC is faint after exiting the car, but also drunk, they should now get the fainting scene, followed by Dilani helping the MC in the bathroom.

UI + TECHNICAL

SETTINGS:

Autoname Save is now defaulted to ON. This is to add ease and flow to gameplay, especially for mobile, tablet, and app users, instead of calling for an inputted saved name. If player wants to input save names, toggle Autoname Saves to OFF.

Autoname Save previously only used the forename of the MC but now includes the surname as well.

Removed the Fullscreen toggle as it is only intended for desktop use. Player can still toggle fullscreen function via the UI bar on the desktop interface.

Added a choice indicator toggle. (This probably won't come into effect until EP 04 or 05)

Changed serif font from Vollkron to EB Garamond.

OTHER:

Changing the MC's pronouns via the Dashboard has been updated. Additionally, after confirmation will take player back to the Dashboard and not close the dialog boxes entirely.

Hovering over 'Personality', 'Motives', and 'Skills' titles in the Dashboard will now display an information box with a definition. Mobile and tablet users will need to tap on the title.

'Resume Game' now only appears on the main menu when there is an autosave in the saves log.

Choices styling changes.

General UI and button style changes.

Fixed errors with the text message styling.

Added styling for reading text off of a page in game.

Darkened blue in light theme 'Skyline' to reduce eye strain.

CREATE A SAVE

Introducing Create a Save! This feature allows players to quickly manufacture a save file and start at a later point in the game.

Set your identity, appearance, history, and statistics; including personality, motives, and skills. Continue to set key decisions made in previous episodes.

Randomise options available for creating a PC and key decisions.

OTHER

Fixed gaps and spacing issues.

Minor phrasing and sentence structure changes.

Grammar and typo fixes.

whew -- that's a lot of patch notes! apologies for so much that needed to be fixed.

this update shouldn't break/ mess with saves but as a disclaimer i will say, if you spot anything funky, broken, or you don't think things are triggering correctly, try starting a new save. the new create a save feature is incredibly code heavy, and it's been tested relentlessly, but i wouldn't be surprised if something crops up.

if starting a new save doesn't resolve your issue - please submit to bug report or just send me an ask/message.

some things have been meaning to get fixed for Some Time - thank you to everyone that is using the bug report form!

apologies if there are typos and/or bugs - this was a long one to edit and my lovely betas did an OUTSTANDING job reading so much for ep 3 - thank you so much again!!! this time i am going to give it a bit more time before i put together a patch so i can grab more error responses haha.

create a save has also added a wee chunk to the word count, somewhere around 6k, but i'm not including it in the episode 03 word count as it's purely code. so, if you think the total wc is off, that's why!

if you've read this far, happy reading and thank you so much for the continued support!! :) - becky <3

[mysticheathenn]

Messages From Your Mental Prison

Hi, Hexlings!

This pick-a-card reading is about your mental health and the state of how you view the world and everything that is going on in your life. This could be about your depression, Anxiety, or even suicidal thoughts. Read with caution as this reading may have triggers.

This is a general reading, remember to take what resonates and leave what does not. This reading does not supplement your need to seek professional help. Tarot should be used as entertainment and not a for sure answer to your problems but as a guide, a sense of hope, and amusement.

Take your time when choosing your pile. Ask yourself the question and choose the picture that you can’t stop looking at. Listen to your intuition.

MasterList

Patreon Link

TW Ahead Read With Caution

Pile l:

Messages From Your Mental Prison. Tarot: 8 of Pentacles (Reversed), 9 of Swords, 4 of Swords (reversed), 10 of Cups (reversed), Justice

This reminds me of the TikTok clip of the voice screaming "It's not fair. It's not fair." reminding me of how many people have probably told you that you handle stress and everyday life so well but little do they know your mental state is literally one inconvenience away from having a mental breakdown. Stress and anxiety practically camp out in your mind on a daily basis pile l. You can't seem to escape it, it's all you have known for quite a while and you're tired. There is a saying that "There is no sleep for the wicked" Well in your case "There is no sleep for the poor or those who lack the resources to pull themselves up in their life." All you want in life is enough to pay your bills and a little extra for savings and be able to do something with your life like try a new hobby without feeling guilty for spending money that isn't on "important" things like survival. You probably have been in survival mode for quite some time now and wondering when will you see a breakthrough. You're tired of being tired. You're tired of practically playing Russian roulette with your bills of which one can you not pay for this month. One thing I will say pile l is even though things may seem bleak please don't give up, I sense things will get better financially for you. Sometimes in life you just need to find your footing for things to take off.

Extra Messages: Tea Tree Leaf Oracle: Seek out information that will help you out, A Journey either physical or mental, unsettled times. Need to plan ahead, Announcement, Get back to the basics.

Pile l your extra message oracles make me believe that you feel lost, maybe even stuck for some of you with no clue in the world of how to better your situation or go about life. You have the get back to the basics card which sticks out to me like a sore thumb letting the game know that I sense you may be the type who always tries to do those get-rich-and-quick schemes like drop shipping or anything else you see that pops up on your social media feed and it never works out for whatever reason. You want to know why....it's because you aren't supposed to be doing that. That's not your path to riches. You have the 8 of Pentacles and 10 of Cups card but it's reversed meaning you are meant to have emotional and financial fulfillment you just need to stop and get back to the basics. What basics mystic? What is it that has been drawing or calling you in? What is something you keep putting off or not doing because you believe based on society and family it won't make you any money? For most of you, this is what you need to be doing. For others of you, you will be going on a journey where you need to find this out. Figure out what feeds your soul that you would do for free and do that but add tax. You are meant to freelance and be your own boss, not working for other people. Overall this is a journey process for you pile l. You will deal with more hard times as you figure this out but remember this journey is temporary to where you want to be, so keep pushing. An answer if it hasn't already will come to you.

Pile ll:

Messages From Your Mental Prison. Tarot: The Hermit, Page of Swords (reversed), Queen of Cups, 10 of Wands, 10 of Swords (reversed)

When was the last time you nurtured yourself or spent time alone and really tried to heal and nurture yourself with positive thoughts pile ll. It's a never-ending cycle of you constantly bombarding yourself with cruel words that aren't true. This reminds me slightly of the reading I posted titled Mystery pt. ll. But overall this feeling of yours feels more so as if the world has its weight on your shoulders and you feel as if you are a burden to those around you. You may live at home, with roommates, or feel that you constantly are asking anyone and everyone around you for help as if you can't do anything for yourself and you're tired. You're ready to be able to be independent without having to rely on others. Maybe others have made you feel bad as well for asking for help when you are down on your luck to where you just feel crushed, stuck, unable to move in a direction because one way people will make you feel bad for your predicament and the other hand you will make yourself feel bad because you feel whatever this is you should be able to do by yourself but can't because life is tough right now. As I mentioned in pile l you need to get back to the basics. Get back to the basics of life and take things one step at a time. You are doing the best you can with what you have and don't let anyone make you feel bad about that.

Extra Messages: Tea Tree Leaf Oracle: Position of authority, August, Someone you know is undependable and insincere, Slowly but surely getting ahead. Pay attention to your work, Good Fortune.

As mentioned your life while it maybe chaotic at the moment everything is a journey and slowly but surely things will get better and you will get ahead eventually. With the Position of authority I am seeing this in two ways some of you should pay attention to your work as there may be a position available for you in management where you can make more money this may happen around or sometime in August. If not within the company you work maybe this is an invitation to be your own boss or look elsewhere for higher positions especially if you have more than enough qualifications. For others of you, this position of authority is letting you know that you are the boss of your own life and have complete control of what goes on and who is in it. Never let people who claim to be friends or family make you feel bad for being on hard times. They aren't who they say they are and you should move accordingly with that information. Overall Good Fortune is in your cards by the end of this rough patch. You just need to focus and hone in on ways you can do more within your life with the resources of which you have. Again this could be moving up in the company or going elsewhere, where advancement is an option.

Pile lll:

Messages From Your Mental Prison. Tarot: The Star, The Sun, Ace of Pentacles (reversed), The Fool (reversed), Awakening

Pile lll, my babies, it's time to allow yourself to be seen by the world. It's time to stop hiding in the shadows allowing life to pass you by. You can't keep yourself in the mental prison of feelings of imposter syndrome, fear of judgment, etc. Life wants to give you financial blessings, especially with the Ace of Pentacles in Reversed but you are blocking them because you aren't doing what needs to be done. This could be you starting a YouTube channel, being a content creator on social media, writing a book or screenplay/ maybe even fanfiction for some of you, others this might just be you hiding from a promotion that you deeply desire but feel you lack experience, knowledge, etc. Whatever this is for you, you have to release the thoughts that plague your mind and go for the thing that puts you in front of everyone. Yes at first you may make mistakes or look cringe or whatever the issue may be but that's how everything is when you first jump deep into something. You make mistakes and people will talk...but you want to know something life moves on and the world doesn't end. Seriously do the thing, it's time. You will beat yourself up if others take the things that you want for yourself and you want to know something you have no one to blame but yourself because you decided to not do what needs to be done. Write the book. Film yourself. Apply for better jobs even if you think you are not qualified. Have you heard of the girl who applied to jobs she had no business doing and ended up getting hired making $100k a year...that could be you right now but you are stuck listening to self-doubt and the thoughts of what others will say. Storytime: I knew that I didn't want to continue working at whatever job I was working at back in 2015 so when my friend and I figured out that employers don't check a lot of your information we applied for positions that would pay us well and you want to know something the resume I lied on got me so far in life to where I was Assistant GM of hotels at one point. All because I believed I could do what others were doing in the hotel industry even without a lick of experience. Did I mess up in the beginning, yes. Did I care...no because I was doing more good than harm so no one really questioned if I lied or not. You have to take the jump. Do the thing.

Extra Messages: Tea Tree Leaf Oracle: Short Journey, Back to Basics, Work achievement & success, TIME TO ACT, Someone is extremely stubborn and unwilling to change, Protected from negative forces beyond your control, Solid foundation success with effort, waiting for news package or letter, A meeting with a strange could be important.

Pile lll do you see the amount of synchronicities in your oracle reading. Spirit is coming through loud and clear that you need to get out of your stubbornness and began acting on your dreams, goals, and desires. You are protected from anything that could try and take what this is away from you. Even with a solid foundation success with effort is telling you "Hey if you do the thing you will not fail because you are protected." Now this goes without saying that you won't deal with some challenges because that's life what it is saying is you will come out on top and the journey for you won't be a long one if you just do the effort that it takes. Spirit will do the rest if you just do what needs to be done.

Pile lV:

Messages From Your Mental Prison. Tarot: The Empress, Queen of Pentacles, 5 of Swords (reversed), 8 of Swords (reversed), 6 of Wands

You are victorious pile lV your only problem is that you don't believe you are worth a pot to piss in a lot of the time. Even with the Empress and Queen of Pentacles card here letting me know how nurturing, giving, empathetic, and even resourceful you are you don't see any good things about yourself. You remind me of people who speak negatively about themselves not knowing that their actions speak the opposite. You can't say you don't care but your actions speak another language. You can't put yourself down but then be upset when life mirrors your thoughts. Deep down you know how amazing you are and the many great things that you can do, but for some strange reason you recently for some of you while others of you this has been going on for a while where you constantly hold yourself to such a low standard and critic everything that you do. Why is that? Where did it begin? How can you remove this person or thing that made you feel this way? For some of you, this may have been a relationship (platonic, romantic, or familial) that made you feel self-critical of yourself because they felt something about themselves. You must remember that when people speak unkind things to you that it's a reflection of themselves and not you. You don't have to take what others think of you and run with it as if they are true because they are not. A scene that comes to mind is when the mom in Black Swan says "What happened to my little girl?" What happened to you that made you feel and think these thoughts to yourself and how can you get back to the Empress and Queen of Pentacle energy.

Extra Messages: Manifestation Oracle Cards: Wellbeing, Empowerment, Strength

How can you today give yourself the love that you deserve? Is it a DIY spa day? A trip to a therapist or talk with a trusted friend? How can you show up for yourself in ways that you haven't before that will make you see the person you are? Have the strength and courage to stand up to anyone who makes you feel any less than what and who you are. For a few of you, you may be a part of the LBGTQ+ community and others around you have made you feel different, a "freak" or whatever insecurity that you question your existence. There is a quote by Elenor Roosevelt that says "No one can make you feel inferior without your permission." Please don't let assholes who were raised by baboons let you lower yourself or feel anything less than amazing, beautiful, and authentically you. Regardless of how you feel about yourself find something in your life, day, or something as small as a freckle on your face that you love and keep bringing more of that energy in for you and keep your head up. This feeling is only temporary, things will get better.

Thank you for liking and reblogging my readings. I always appreciate you guys on here and on Patreon.

Stay safe and be blessed

[toxicanonymity]

For context, a tumblr account has been posting anon hate for the past week or so, mostly toward writers. A parasocial hater of mine discovered the account and has been going to town. I posted this after they invoked Israel as an analogy. Yes really.

Obviously I am disgusted by what I just read, and floored that anyone would post such a deranged analogy in the interest of stirring up fandom drama. I'm very sorry to everyone who has been attacked and everyone who has witnessed all this. Others have posted about the situation as a whole, and I'm not sure what I could add. But I want you to know many of these "confessions" are from one individual who has been fixated on me (and probably others) for weeks if not months. I already had the following in my drafts:

warning: please don't read this if you're sensitive to hate or could be triggered by the trivialization of real abuse. (edit: they went on to trivialize genocide too but they'll pretend to be different people). there's also a really gross anatomical reference.

the screenshots are all after I blocked them.

I normally don't address things like this, but that's because I'm trying to keep it off your dash and off my blog (for several reasons including not wanting to give the hate a larger audience for their message). Normally I block/delete. But thanks to a blog dedicated to posting anon hate, some of this is already on the dash, and I thought some additional context could be illuminating.

a couple weeks ago, this person chimed in on my non-fandom post, and their comment made me uncomfortable. I checked to see if they followed me and they didn't, plus their blog tagline was antagonistic. I was confident they weren't being earnest. I replied, pointing out my issue with their comment and asking them to keep their thoughts to themselves rather than coming at me from a sideblog. I thought they must have followed me from a main account since they somehow found an untagged, unreblogged post without following me. But I now realize they were simply hate checking my blog.

(Blocked the burner too)

They were saying this last bit preemptively - I've never talked about stalkers here. I didn't include all their anons, just enough to show they clearly out themselves as being the same person. In other "confessions," they make repeated references to a former fandom writer they idolize (not me) who they also posted about on their blog.

I won't be dropping this creep's url in this post, but I had never heard of them. This week they have repeatedly changed their url, display name, and blog appearance. Their writing is recognizable and I believe they are responsible for the unhinged asks preceding katy's departure from tumblr. They also made a rude comment on her post.

This may only aggravate them. I expect them to hurl any lies and accusations they can think of toward me. They will act like they're laughing and amused, too. You may recognize their tone. I want to trust this fandom not to believe and repeat anything they hear, but unfortunately my experience in this fandom leaves me pessimistic.

I can only hope people use common sense at this point.

Note - I know I'm normally really private about everything, but you're welcome to share this. Their lies are already out there anyway. Also feel free to DM me and I will tell you what you want to know.

Update: the anon-hate account referred to above has deactivated. It was named pedgeconfessions. It wasn't the first to pop up this summer and may not be the last.

[thisisntablogspost]

Say You’re Mine - Miniseries

READ PART ONE HERE

Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warning: MDNI! This miniseries contains triggers that may cause a negative effect to the consumer. This includes cheating, forced proximity, toxic dom/sub dynamics, unhealthy relationships, alcohol, coercion, manipulation, unprotected piv (don’t do this). The reader is consenting and allows these things to happen to them.

Authors note: Thank you so much for the positive feedback! I hope you enjoy part two as much as I did writing it! If this isn’t something you don’t want to read please avoid and I’ll catch you on the next one! If I missed any other triggers please dm me so I can add them. I want you all to be safe when reading my fanfics. Your mental health matters. 🖤

Part Two.

It’s only been a week since you last saw Noah. You’ve been on edge ever since your last “endeavor” with him. Ryan hasn’t noticed anything different, of course he hasn’t. You feel bad that you allowed Noah to manipulate you so easily. It’s what he does best.

A group chat message is sent out about a get together today around noon. Your stomach drops when you see that Ryan replied that you two would be attending.

“I don’t want to go, Ryan” you say immediately when he walks out of the bathroom. He looks at you with a confused expression on his face.

“Why? You had fun last week at the Halloween party, right? I was bummed I couldn’t go” he sighed, sitting down on the couch as you stood in the kitchen making breakfast for the two of you.

You look up to meet his gaze, you offer a smile.

“I did…but it wasn’t the same without you.” You grab the spatula mixing the eggs together, making sure they cook through completely. The buzzer on the toaster goes off signaling the toast is done. He watches you gather everything together for you both, he comes to the table and helps you set up the table.

“Come on, y/n. It’ll be fun. Besides, your plus one will be with you. Please, baby” he gives you that damn pouty lip and puppy dog eyes. You laugh. You step up on your toes to give him a kiss. His green eyes staring into yours with so much love. It made you queasy that you messed around with Noah. The guilt is eating you up inside, yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him the truth of what happened.

“You’re annoying, haha, okay fine. We can go.” He fist bumps the air, you laugh again as you bring over the rest of the dishes for breakfast. He lets you set down everything and wraps his arms around you, bringing you into a passionate kiss.

—

You and Ryan arrived at the house. Ryan shuts off the car, taking out the keys, and gets out making his way to your side to open the door. You thank him, your heart is pounding, your palms are sweaty. You truly don’t want to be here. You don’t want to be put in the same situation again. You don’t want that temptation to be presented to you. Ryan walks in front of you to knock on the door, jolly answers with a hello and smile. Jolly steps aside to let you and Ryan in. Your eyes darted around the room to look for Noah. You’re taken away from your thoughts. You smile, hugging jolly and the rest of the guys. Ryan went off with the guys and you are alone. You walk over to the kitchen, spotting the cooler, and opening it to get out a cold bottle of water. You twist the lid, drinking a large gulp. You look over to see Noah looking at you. You freeze in place, like a deer caught in headlights.

Noah smirks, pocketing his phone. He crosses his arms and sinks into the couch. He’s watching you like a predator watching his prey. You could tell by his widening smile that he loved the effect he had on you. He loved how nervous you would get in his presence. He had you right where he wanted. He couldn’t help himself as his eyes trailed along every inch of you. You are exactly how he wanted you tonight. Uneasy and on edge. He is loving every second of it. You find the courage to follow Ryan, and the guys. You didn’t want to give Noah an opportunity to mess with you, because by the looks of it. He is enjoying this twisted game.

As the night went on, you kept close to Ryan. He had his arm wrapped around your shoulder. His gentle caresses up and down your arm. He places a kiss on your cheek. In the midst of the chatting, you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. Ryan lets go of you and goes back to the conversation. You look over to see Noah isn’t anywhere in sight. You breathe a sigh of relief as you walk down the hallway to the bathroom.

You close the bathroom door behind you. You turn to the mirror. You look a mess. You run your fingers through your hair to fix what you could. Why did he have such an effect on you like this? You close your eyes, inhaling and exhaling. He must’ve left. You haven’t noticed him for a while. You hear footsteps, your eyes moving towards the door. You realize you didn’t lock it. You rush to the door. Noah pushes the door open, quickly pinning you to the wall as he shuts the door locking it. You yelp, everything is happening so quickly. You look up and whimper. His hand instantly finds your jaw, holding you still as his hand tilts your head to look up at him, his face close to yours.

"Look at you…all fidgety, nervous…and I’ve barely done anything"

“Noah…you need to leave” His hand cups your jaw, his hold is firm. His voice is low as his thumb softly rubs your chin.

"You know I’m not going anywhere, right?"

“My boyfriend is here.” You move away from him. You turn your body around to face the counter, and bathroom mirror.

"I know you can't help how you get all worked up for me.” He gets close and presses his chest against your back. You look up at his reflection in the mirror. It’s all too much. This close proximity of him. You try to turn, he holds you in place. He bends forward resting his chin on your shoulder.

“Please..” You don’t know what you’re begging for.

"Please what? Tell me what you want.”

“I’m going to leave this bathroom, and you are not going to follow me.” You glare at him in the mirror. That smug look is a permanent expression on his face as he listens to you.

"You know you don't mean that. You know you need me to touch you again. I own this body, and you know it.” He purrs, his hand trails along your side. Once again, you are at his mercy. You grip the counter. His hands trailing down your back. He pulls your hips against him.

"There it is. Poor thing, look at you. You’re already reacting to me, and I’ve barely done anything.” He says, rubbing his hand along your lower back. You look at his expression. His eyes are trailing over your body as you’re pressed up against him. You whine at his touch, his arousal right up against you. He smirks, biting his lip, meeting your gaze in the mirror. His hand slowly dancing along your waist, and over your hip bone.

"You know what’s funny? You keep acting like you don’t want this, like you don’t want me. Here you are, pinned against the counter, my hands roaming over your body. You haven’t told me to stop. I think you’re lying to yourself.” He snickers, his fingertips caressing your inner thigh.

"I know you need me. You’re a desperate little thing, aren’t you?”

“Noah…I…I” You look away from his gaze. He’s quick to turn your head to look up at him.

"Do you want me to stop?" His voice is low and husky. His eyes search yours, waiting for your response. You nod your head yes.

"You want me to stop touching you? You want me not to take control, is that right?" A wicked grin spreads across his face. He pulls away slightly, only to settle next to your ear. You return your gaze to the mirror. You lock eyes with him. Did you want him to stop? His smirk grows, knowing he's got you right where he wants you.

“I…” You hear the knock on the door. Noah smirks, the asshole.

“Yes? Occupied.”

“Y/n? You okay in there?” Your eyes widened. Fuck. It’s Ryan. You struggle to find the right words. Noah’s eyes wandering over your body, the door knob is jiggling.

“I…my stomach hurts…I think it was the food we ate earlier” you say calmly, if he only knew your heart was racing. Noah chuckles darkly in your ear.

“You want me to take you home? Or you want to lay down?” Your heart aches hearing his concerned voice. He truly cares about you. You sigh, looking up at Noah’s reflection in the mirror. You should be telling Noah to fuck off, but you can’t. His hand rubbed your inner thigh softly, seeing how this was such a perfect opportunity. He could do whatever he wanted. Even when your boyfriend is at the door. You are his, and he knew you are weak beneath him. You couldn’t deny him. You grip the counter tighter, trying to not moan or make a sound as he ran a hand over your pussy.

“N-no…I’ll..I’ll lay down after I’m done in here” You try smacking Noah’s hand away, he grabs your wrists, holding them behind your back.

“Okay, babe. Let me know if you need anything.” You hear him walk away.

“So what are you going to do, huh? Get me all riled up again then stop? That’s your plan, right?” His grip on your wrists loosen, letting your hands free. They go back to the counter to steady yourself. His fingers slowly dance along your inner thighs, trailing over your clit. You whine, you look up at him. You feel your arousal soaking your underwear.

"Your boyfriend is outside right now, you know? I'm pretty sure you're supposed to be with him, yet you're right here in your ex's arms. You’re whimpering and wanting me instead.”

“Fuck off, Noah” He chuckles, his hands trailing up your spine. He pushes you down firmly against the counter. You cry out, his hand covers your mouth. He leans over you, his breath fanning over your neck.

"Look at you being so defiant when I know how badly you want me. You can't help that your body yearns for me, even just the sound of my voice makes you weak. Don’t you want to be a good girl for me?” You struggle underneath him, but it’s no use. He keeps you in place. Don’t you want to be a good girl for me? It rings loudly in your head. You shiver, the state of submission coming over you.

“Nnn..yes”

"Then say it. Admit you want me, beg me the way you used to…" His voice is low against your ear.

“I..I want you…”

"Good girl. Now admit you need me, tell me how bad you missed me, and my touch”

“I crave it. It’s all I can think about. It..it scares me how bad I want you” Your pleading expression meets his gaze. His fingers gently scratch your inner thighs as he purrs in your ear.

"That's a good girl. You’re so honest, so weak for me. Look at you trembling underneath my touch, my words. You missed this, didn't you? You missed belonging to me. Oh, but you’re forgetting something, sweet girl” He expression darkens. You know what he’s talking about. You calling him his title, the one he burned into your memory, and my god if you forget it.

“Y-yes, sir..”

His growl sends chills down your spine. You look up at him, he is quick to turn your face back to the mirror.

“That’s my good girl.”

“Please…”

"I need words, use your words. Are you going to be a good girl and tell me what you want?” He chuckles darkly as his fingertips brush over your pussy again, barely touching you. He bends close to your ear to whisper.

“I need you. Please…please…touch me” He smacks your ass hard. Your breath hitches. You jolt forward at the sudden impact from his hand. Noah chuckles darkly. He smacks your ass again. He soothes the sting causing you to squirm as he kneads your red bottom.

"Be a good girl for me, and ask me properly..."

“Please, touch me, sir”

"Good girl, where do you want me to touch you?” He smirks, loving how you beg. His roughness is all telling how badly he needed you.

“Please, touch my pussy, sir. Please.” You moan, feeling his fingers trail all the way, slowly, barely touching you. He was enjoying this, loving how a single touch from him can make you lose control.

"Right here?” You whine, a feather like touch. One to make your body tingle.

“Y-yes, sir” Your breath hitches, your head dropping low.

“Do you need me as badly as I need you?” His breath hot against your neck. He nips at the sensitive skin as he moves your underwear to the side.

“Mmm..yes, sir”

"You're being so good, behaving, begging for it. Only I can make you weak like this, right?" He chuckles darkly, and purrs in your ear.

Yes, sir. Only you make me feel like this.” He pulls his hand away. You whine as he grips your throat making you look at him in the mirror.

“You don’t act like it” He teases. He’s toying with you, breaking you down slowly to succumb to his madness. You can only whimper in response, which makes him laugh.

"Look at how you react to my voice. You’re a pathetic, whimpering mess for me.”

“Y-yes, sir”

"Good girl” He whispers. His hand moves to the middle of your back, holding you in place. He knows how badly you need him. He taps your cunt lightly, it makes your toes curl.

“F-Fuck..” The sensation alone makes your head spin. You need more.

"I won't give you what you want till you beg properly, you know that…"

“I..mmmph..” you huff. You do know that. He pulls his fingers away, you whine in protest. You look at him in the mirror.

" Ah, Ah, Ah. Use your words, and I just might continue. How badly do you need me right now?”

“Please, sir. I need you so bad. Please touch me…I’ll be good, and tell you what I want”

"Go on, be a good girl or you don't get what you want” He grins, watching you slowly turn to shambles.

“Fuck me, go down on me, finger me…please do something, sir.” You hate how desperate you sound for him. You can’t help it, he brings out this side of you.

“Good girl”

"Say it one more time for me. Tell me how badly you need me to take control. How you need me to make you feel good.”

“Please…I need you…please touch me, please take control.” You push back into him, your body is on fire. You need some kind of friction to take the ache away. He tuts at you, holding your hips in place, against him.

*He brings his hand down over your pelvis, barely touching, his fingers brushing against you.

"Tell me you belong to me…" A hushed whisper against your neck.

“I belong to you, sir. Only you.” He’s repeating the same thing he did before. No, not this game. Another part of the game is to make you fall apart, and submit to him completely, continuously tearing down your walls. He leans close and presses his chest against your back.

"Good girl, only I can make you this needy. Only I can make you mine. You missed this, didn't you?" He’s so manipulative. So persuasive with his words.

“Even when I’m with him. I think of you.” He grins. His fingers continue to tease.

"Say who owns you, pretty girl”

“You, sir”

“Only me?” He nips your shoulder. You nod your head yes.

“Say you need me. All of me” You feel his hand gliding up your back, into your hair, grabbing a handful, and tugging her hair back to look at him.

“I need all of you, sir” You wince. He smiles darkly at you in the mirror.

"I'm so close to giving you that. Can you promise you'll behave? Can you be good for me?"

“I’ll be a good girl for you, sir”

"Good…"

He rubs your thighs.

"Then beg…" He growls into your ear. Your eyes widened, you just begged him. You practically gave your vulnerable self to him. This is what he does. You have to remember that. He will keep going until there’s not a thought left in your mind, only him and his words.

“P-Please, sir. Touch me..”

"Say it…like you're desperate…" he laughs, barely touching you. It’s slowly driving you insane. He grips your hips, then wraps his hand around your throat*

“It’s all I can think about, please, sir. Please” His hand tightens around your neck, his lips brushing against your cheek.

"Good girl, tell me how bad you miss me..."

“I…I miss you so much”

"Show me how bad you need this…"

“I want you to fuck me, sir. Please, please, please!” You cringe internally, you sound so…weak. He’s right, you are so weak for him.

"Is that all you can come up with?" He grins. He nips your neck. You can hear him almost snicker at your desperation. His voice gravelly, husky as he whispers in your ear.

"Tell me how badly you need me to make you mine…"

“Noah, please. I’ve been on edge for the past week, because of you working me up, and denying me. Please, I don’t want to be toyed with anymore..”

He bites your earlobe. His voice is low and dangerous.

"And what if I continue to deny you?"

“I think I’ll go insane” He chuckles darkly, loving that you’re so needy for him, just aching for him.

"You'll do as I say, won't you? You wouldn't disobey me…"

“No, sir. I wouldn’t, please.”

"Say you belong to me.." He traces his fingers along your inner thighs.

“I belong to you, sir”

"Say it again for me.” He whispers low and dark, loving how hard it is for you to control yourself.

“I..I belong to you, sir.”

He smirks. He caresses along her body and inner thighs. It's so hard for you to not just grab his hand, and make him give you what you need.

"Say you're mine…" Your gaze returns to the mirror, his eyes locked on yours. Your knuckles are turning white from how tightly you’re gripping the counter. His warm hands running along your body, your pussy, your inner thighs.

“I’m yours..” a breathless response comes from you.

"You're mine to take control over, and you know how good I'm going to make you feel. How weak you're going to be for me..."

“Please…please touch me, sir. I can’t take it anymore” These mind games of his are starting to take their toll on you.

"You're so desperate…so needy for me…" He purrs in your ear as his fingers circle around your covered pussy. You buck into his hand.

"Say you need me so badly that you can't take any more teasing, and denial…" He nuzzles against your neck, his lips brushing against your sensitive skin. He dips his head placing a kiss on your collarbone. Your breath hitches, your eyes return to his in the mirror. Your lips part to protest, but it’s nothing more than a whine of need and desire. You let your head fall back against his chest. He holds you tightly against him. A somewhat peaceful moment between such a chaotic scene.

“I don’t want to admit how much I miss you. You’re so bad for me. I can’t help myself around you.” You feel him smirks against your skin. You feel your body melt underneath him. Your hands releasing the counter, your body weak.

"I'm so bad for you, and yet you can't resist me. How unfortunate.” He says against her neck as his hands dance over your pussy. He’s still not giving you what you want. His hands move along your thighs, he brings one up to your stomach, it trails up between the valley of your breasts, up to your neck. He ever so delicately places his hand around your throat. You look up at him, he’s already looking down at you. His hand tightens around your throat.

"Do you want me to take control over you, to own your body, and make you mine?”

“Please”

“Please what, use your words. You’re so quick to forget.” His hand tightening around your throat. His voice low and dark in your ear.

“Ahhh…y-yes, sir.” You reach up to hold his arm. His grip tightens making your head spin, and your body betray you.

"You can't help but give in to me, can you? You want to be mine, to belong to me, to submit, and give in, don't you?" He nibbles along your neck. His grip tightening around your neck, watching your body shudder.

“Yes, sir”

"I know how badly you want it. You're being such a good girl, look how weak you are, look how needy you are. You're trembling in my arms…" He says in a condescending tone in your ear.

"But you're not begging for it, are you? You need to beg me for it, be my good girl.”

“Yes…yes I’ll be good please, sir” He touches your pussy once more, you arch against him. Your body is on edge, the slightest touch from him is causing your brain to short circuit. He tugs down your leggings, tossing them somewhere. His hands roam over your ass. You look back at him, he suddenly stops. He smirks at you, waiting to see if you would beg. He knew you needed it badly, so bad you’d beg for him.

“Take them off, please, sir.”

“There we go. Look at you, being a good girl.” He slowly pulls your underwear down, finally giving you what she want. The cool air makes you shiver, yet, your body is scorching hot. He kicks your feet apart. Your body lowers onto the marble counter.

"Mm…you look so good like this. So vulnerable, and all mine.” He groans, needing you so badly. You see him drop to his knees behind you.

"I know what you need, what you crave. There’s a dark little side of you that’s enjoying this.” He runs his tongue up the back of your thigh. You moan, the feeling of his tongue and hands is otherworldly. You could feel him smirking against you. He knew how bad you needed this. He begins to lick and suck at the flesh around your pussy, but never going where you need him most. His fingers tease around your entrance, through your folds, around the entirety of your pussy.

“So wet. All for me?” You pant, whimpering as his finger is inserted into your core. He slowly moves his finger in and out of you. He places kisses along your inner thighs, working back up to your clit.

“My god, Noah…fuck…please” He stops which causes you to whine and push your hips back. You see him move back slightly.

"Please what…"

“You want me to stop? Hmm? Your soaking cunt is telling me otherwise, you greedy little girl”

“I need more, sir. Please”

"Beg one more time for me”

“Mmph…please, sir.” His hands run up your thighs lightly, the feather like touches tickling you.

"You're such a good girl begging for me.” You enjoyed his praises. He leans in closer to your core, his hot breath fanning over you. It sends shiver throughout your body. He places a kiss on your clit, running his tongue up through your folds. Your breath hitches when he does that, he does it again. He starts sucking your clit into his mouth. You groan, pushing into him. You feel your body shaking.

“You taste so fucking good.” He swirls his tongue around your clit, then over your entrance. You are crumbling fast. You craved this, loved it when he ate you out. He moves his hands to your waist to keep you steady as he worships you. You feel the band in your belly winding up tight, your breath hitches as you feel your release building.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck” You grind against his face, he smirks against you. You know he’s loving how you give into him so easily.

"You're mine, only mine…" He said it in between kisses and licks. You feel your knees buckling. He adds a finger, then another. You arch your back, it feels so good. He huffs, you’re so worked up and wet. There’s no resistance as his fingers sink deep in you. He starts with that agonizing slow pace again. He turns and curves his digits coaxing you, working you as the need for your release grows stronger and stronger.

“Atta girl, so good for me. I need you to beg me to make you mine.”

“Please, make me yours, sir. Please.”

"Good girl, say you belong to me.” His fingers curl up, he knew you so well. He knows exactly what you needed.

“Ohhh fuck…right there…I belong to you, sir!” Your whimpers get louder, he keeps his pace. Simultaneously fingering and swirling tight circle around your clit. You’re so close.

"Say it again…"

“I..I belong to you, sir” You whimper, you are right there on the edge. You wouldn’t dare cum without his permission.

"Again…" He smiles, whispering against you as he nuzzles his nose against your clit.

“I belong to you, sir.” He moved his fingers with such precision, coaxing you to go over the edge. It was so bad and so good at the same time. Your mind wanders back to Ryan. Poor Ryan. He didn’t deserve this…or you. He smacks your ass, a warning. He’s always watching your every move. He must’ve noticed the change in your body language. He stops and stands up, his arms caging you in, his hands next to yours on the counter.

“Don’t think about him, turn it off. You’re only thinking of me. Do you understand? I will leave you with fucking nothing. Only the mess I made of you to clean up. Got it?” You cry out as he smacks your ass much harder this time.

“I said, do you understand me, y/n? Answer me.” He is leaning over you, grabbing a handful of hair, yanking it tightly as his lips brush against your ear.

“Y-yes, sir. I understand.” His eyes watch yours in the mirror. He looks over you in your current state. A disheveled mess just for him. He growls, his nostrils flare. He shoves your head forwards, sinking back down behind you. He goes right back to fingering you, like nothing happened. Your mind is fuzzy, you try to focus on the sensations he’s bringing you. He hits the spots within you and your eyes rolls back. His tongue finds your clit again, sucking harder this time. You squeal, he growls, doing it again. You are panting, hating that he’s coaxing you to your release again within seconds.

“Who. Do. You. Belong. To? Hmm? Whose pussy is this?” He picks up his pace, hitting that spot over and over again.

“Yours. It’s all yours, sir. I belong to you.” You whine and moan. Your knees are buckling. It’s right there.

“Good girl. Good fucking girl.” He pulls away from your clit to bite your thighs, you whine. He soothes the sting running his tongue along his bite marks. He returns to your clit, swirling those tantalizing tight circles, sucking your bud into his mouth.

“I’m..gonna…cum.” He doesn’t say anything, he keeps going. It’s all too much, the band in your belly is about to snap.

“Please, sir. May I cum, please?” Noah could feel your walls clenching around his fingers. You are so close, why isn’t he answering. You look at him, you can see his hooded eyes as he comes up from eating you. He makes eyes contact with you.

"No…" He smiles at that, and stops. Your knees buckle, you drop to the floor. You couldn’t believe he’d deny you again. You look up at him, tears in your eyes.

“Why? I…I…” You watch him towering above you, his mouth wrapped around his fingers, tasting you. He licks them clean, wiping them on a towel. He crouches down on his knees and strokes your cheek. His thumb gently wipes away your tears.

"Good things don't come easy, now do they?” You pull away from his touch. You look away as he stands up, chuckling to himself as he makes his way to the door.

"I'll see you around, y/n. I'll let you go back to your boyfriend now. I want you to remember how weak you are to me.” He closes the door behind him, the tears roll down your cheeks. You wipe them, then look up to see the door is unlocked. You quickly get up to lock the door. You didn’t need anyone to see you in your current state. You gather your underwear and leggings, pulling them back up onto your body. You ached, you are pissed off, and frustrated.

After a few minutes to collect yourself, you exit the bathroom. You walk down the hallway, no one is in the house. You hear voices outside. Ryan is helping Folio cook the burgers and hotdogs. You walk outside and Ryan sees you instantly. He wraps his arms around you, placing a kiss on your forehead.

“You okay?” You nod, the ache in your heart is to strong.

“I’m going to go lay down. Let me know when food is ready.” He kisses you, then lets you go find a room to get away from everyone for a while.

(Don’t hate me. To be continued 🖤)

[olderthannetfic]

Okay, I need advice: I'm in a very tiny fandom (like less than two dozen active people and everyone knows each other) and one of the women in it is kind of freaking me out.

We became mutuals because we had some good discussions on some of the characters we liked, but I soon became sort of uncomfortable with a lot of her online behavior whereas simultaneously she's DM-ing me more and more.

She's one of those people who's a hardliner on the issues she cares about (mostly feminism- and SA-related) while talking over people when it comes to issues she doesn't care about (mostly racism and related things). And I see a lot of her trying to intrusively police how other people talk/act, derailing people's posts, arguing with people online over the most stupid shit (where not even her own opinions come off as overly coherent - this week she'll argue something along the lines of "men are evil" and the next she'll argue that people are "demonizing masculinity" - I'll add for clarification that she's not a TERF and supports trans rights but boy... Does she sound like one sometimes) and then digging through people's profiles to find and publicize minor transgressions and bad takes, passive-aggressive vagueposting, and going into mental breakdowns over the most innocuous of online interactions.

TBH she scares me. As someone who suffered through toxic people getting overly attached to me, I genuinely sometimes get a physical reaction when I see her lashing out on the dash.

And she keeps initiating conversations! And sometimes I don't reply or bring the conversation to a natural closure and she keeps at it, or sends me random fics of hers to read that I don't have the heart to tell her don't interest me or whatever. And recently when she disagrees with something I reblogged she direct messages me to rant about it - with a lot of sort of indirect language because she doesn't want to offend me but I can see the intent. The last couple of times I replied politely because I cared about clearing misunderstandings on the topic but next time I'm just gonna tell her I dislike it when she does that.

I really want this person to stop interacting with me, to be honest, and all my polite hints to the effect go unnoticed. But the fandom is so small I feel awkward and uncomfortable about unfollowing or blocking her. I don't think she's too bad of a person, she just comes off as very... Mentally ill, I guess? And since I've tried to be polite so far I feel like it might come out of left field for her?

TBH I feel like something about her behavior also triggers some kind of freeze/fawn reaction inside of me that I don't often get and consequently don't know how to deal with.

So I need impartial advice because I don't see the situation clearly myself

--

To summarize, a person who is a walking red flag wants to be friends, and you can't easily ghost her because the fandom is small.

I think you have to accept that there is no low-conflict way out of this.

That's what's holding you back, right? You don't want more drama and you know it's coming. I think you already know in your heart of hearts that you need to get away from her even if it's a pain in the ass.

Step one is to stop responding to her DMs. That will probably make her reach out more, but you should keep not responding. If she escalates and attacks you over it, block her.

The more you offer reasons or try to gently hint, the more that will encourage her. I don't think that's true of everyone, but I do think it's the case here. This is both because it doesn't sound like she's good at perceiving or respecting boundaries and because she inspires a bad lack of ability to assert boundaries in you.

I agree that it's unfortunate that you can't stand up for yourself or tell her plainly when she's out of line, but since you can't and that probably won't change any time soon, you'll need to protect yourself a different way. Sometimes, we just have to avoid people who are bad for us even when it's an us problem. (And here, whoaaaa red flags, so I don't think it's just a you problem anyway.)

There are many sad, lonely, needy people in the world. Some of them are officially mentally ill in some way with a diagnosis. Some just need things they aren't currently getting. That sucks...

But it's also not your job to fix.

[justkending]

Mr. & Mrs. Hunt (Chapter 6/7)

Mini-Series Summary: Two of the most stubborn people in the group partnered together for an undercover mission are also the two people with the most hatred for each other, so what could go wrong? Or is it, what COULDN’T go wrong?…

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger Reader (Enemies to Lovers) (Fake Marriage Trope)

Word Count: 3300+

A/N: I have only read through this once, but I plan on revising it this afternoon, so please excuse any mistakes! The next chapter will be the last, and I'm so glad you guys have enjoyed it up to this point :) You all are the best! (Also, I tried fixing as many of the tags as I could, but if it's still acting weird, please message me or send an ask!)

_________

Chapter 6:

“Shit, you have a mean right hook, but you kinda have to hit the target for it to have the impact you want!” I pant as I move just seconds before Bethanne makes contact with the wall behind me. “You learn that in pilates? Maybe I should take it up.” 

Reggie let out a frustrated grunt from the room over where Bucky was now ducking and weaving out of angry, calculated swings. 

In assessing my opponent's fighting patterns, I sense Bethanne going in for another swing. Grabbing the picture frame off the wall, I bash it into her head, where she teeters and falls back, discombobulated enough for me to move to help Bucky.

“I should have known better than to trust you two,” Reggie grunts as he gets a slight jump on Bucky, shouldering him and taking him to the ground. “Especially you’re bitch of a fake wife-”

I go to handle the comment for myself and help Bucky, but something about the slur triggers Bucky to handle the situation on his own, and the next thing I know, he’s now on top of Reggie and twisting his arms in a way that causes a wale in pain to follow. 

“That’s not how you speak about a lady,” he grits through his teeth and winds back to swing. 

At the same moment, with my attention elsewhere, Bethanne comes from behind me with a piece of glass from the picture frame -that didn’t do the job I’d hoped- and slices deeply in the back of my arm, getting a scream and hiss from me. 

She’s seething when I turn around, her own hand dripping blood on their pristine white carpet from the clamp she has on it, ready to give another slash when the opportunity presents itself. 

I hear Bucky shout my name, distracted by my injury, and then catch a glimpse of the tussle that breaks back out between the two men. One problem at a time. 

Holding the back of my arm, feeling the blood leave my body faster than I expected, I twist my head to the side at the blonde. I learned the intimidation tactic from Wanda, and when I say it works, it works…

Bethanne’s crass smile falls, and she is smart enough to take a few steps back. 

“I’m not a gentleman, so I won’t hold my tongue, bitch,” I add emphasis on the name and start walking to her with my head down and eyes glaring at her. Instantly, she turns on her heel and runs to another room, where I pick up my speed and follow her. 

I get my foot in between the doorframe before she has the chance to shut it, and dear God, I wish I had my Doc Martens right now to kick the damn thing down. I shove my shoulder into it, and she stumbles back for a lamp in the bedroom we were in now. 

Not well calculated, she throws a small one, and I dodge it as it slams into the door behind me. 

“Come on, Bethanne. All those sole cycles and bare classes, and you don’t want to see if those muscles work? Throw a hit like a woman. Let’s make this more interesting,” I move to a fighting stance and ignore the sting on my arm, knowing I have fleeting moments of adrenaline before the blood loss catches up. 

“You’re just mad you got caught,” she spits out, and I mean literally spits out. The saliva would have hit my foot if she wasn’t such a sissy. “You think we didn’t catch on from the second bug you destroyed? Pretty fucking obvious if you ask me.” 

I could hear more pieces of furniture breaking off in the other room and realized that maybe this chit-chat needed to end. 

“Sure. Let’s go with you guys figuring it out sooner. If that makes you feel better about all this,” I shrug, rolling my eyes and stepping in to move this party along. 

____________

The night before. Bucky’s POV:

Due to the wire in the bathroom, which neither Y/N nor I wanted to deal with, I had to shift my nighttime bathroom routine to the master’s. 

Like any normal master bath, there were two sinks, and I stationed myself at the one Y/N hadn’t. For the first time since coming to this place, we actually felt like a couple as we both got situated on our side of the counter and started doing our nightly regime. 

“How intense of a wire do you think it is?” she asked quietly after washing her face and dapping the water off her skin with a clean towel. 

The doors to the bathroom and her room were both closed, creating a barrier to the others. 

“I think we’re safe to talk in here,” I answered, rinsing my toothbrush I’d just used and throwing it into the travel bag I had. 

“Ok, so I can ask freely, how much longer do you think this mission is going to take?” she sighs, opening the cabinet in front of her, taking out three cosmetic vials, and putting them in a practiced order in front of her. 

“Huh?” I let slip, and she turned to me with furrowed eyebrows. 

“Huh, what?” 

I shake out of my disbelief and look at her clean and noticeably smooth face. A subtle scar next to her eyebrow being the only form of imperfection by societal rules, but I wouldn’t call it that. 

“I didn’t think you were a,” I paused, not sure what to call what I was seeing. I just saw her as someone who would splash some water on her face at the night's end and call it a day. Then again, I didn’t know enough about face creams and serums I’ve seen Nat and Wanda use. 

“A clean person?” she finishes my sentence with a harsh laugh as she brings out a spray bottle with a maroon liquid in it from another cabinet, spritz her face three times and pats it in with her hand. 

“Don’t think that’s the word I was looking for,” I shake my head, running a hand through my hair and fidgeting as I feel her gaze shift to me. 

“Not a face washer and 20 ageless serums kind of guy?” she hums, rubbing a green goop in her hands before all over your face. “Well, not all of us are aging at the rate of paint drying. Some of us have to put in effort to look this good.” 

I smirk at that because I don’t think she realizes what she just said. 

“You say I’m effortlessly handsome?” I grin, turning and resting my back on the counter as I watch her. 

She can’t seem to help her own smile and bites her lip as she fans her face, grabbing another small dropper bottle. 

“You know what? Don’t even try and pretend you don’t know you’re a pretty face,” she blushes and tries to backtrack. “God. Can you believe the difference this conversation would have been just two hours ago? And now I’m here calling you pretty.” 

“I’m not complaining.” The grin on my face hurts with how authentic it is. “And if it makes you feel any better, I think Reggie would steal you away as his wife if I weren’t already attached to you.” 

“Ah, yes. The testosterone battle that took place tonight. Glad you brought that up,” she nods, placing the finished bottles back in the cabinet and adding the last serum to her face. Her skin had a nice glow after the magic treatments. “I knew men lay their claim, but you seemed more intense than I’d imagined you’d be about that kind of stuff.”

“He was undressing you with his eyes,” I said sternly, compared to the easy-going tone we had stuck to. “He needed to be set straight acting like that.” My arms crossed as I watched her unbothered by the conversation piece.

“And you, acting like a lion ready to bite the head off of him while trying to get on their good side, was the way to counter that behavior?” 

“I wasn’t that intimidating.”

“You’re James Buchanan Barnes. You don’t have to put on an act to be intimidating. Therefore, when you put on any protective act, the intimidation act just multiplies.” She deadpans to me. 

Ok, maybe she was right… I was a little more invasive into her space this evening, but it was to prove a point. 

“I was doing my job,” I shrug, stepping closer, picking up her skincare bottle, and examining it. 

“You played the annoyed and jealous husband very well. I’ll make sure your nomination for a Tony Award is submitted.” 

I shake my head, handing her the bottle she places precisely in the cabinet. 

“Are you a neat freak?” I ask, and she turns to me, pulling her hair out of the ponytail she had put in to wash her face. 

“I’m not anal if that’s what you think? I prefer things to be organized where it’s helpful.” 

“I’m pretty sure that’s what a neat freak would say…”

“Says the man who organized the spices alphabetically and sorts the coffee pods by color.” She tidies her space, wiping any water with a washcloth, and turns out of the room, flipping the light switch with me still in there. 

“When you’re cooking, it makes things easier to find. That’s just common sense. And the color thing? Well, it’s aesthetically pleasing,” I debate, following her on her heel. 

“Sure thing, neat freak…” she laughs, going to her side of the bed and getting her nightstand prepared for the night. 

I watch her, and she doesn’t seem to mind as I silently catalog her ritual. When she finally gets things settled and looks at me, waiting for a reason for why I’m still in her room, I stumble over my words. 

“You’re question earlier.” Considering the life mic in the room across the hall, I have to be careful in choosing my words. “Maybe this suburban life isn’t as bad as we thought it was. It is a nice break from our former day-to-day.”

She nods, pulling back the covers of her bed and rubs lotion from her bedside into her palms. 

“There are some aspects I’ve come to like,” she smiles genuinely. 

“Agreed.”

____________

Present Time

In seconds, Bethanne was unconscious and lying on the ground with a curtain cord binding her on the ground. She’d be occupied enough for me to help Bucky restrain his opponent and come back to move her after. 

I held the back of my arm, which was still oozing blood. The dizziness was slowly creeping up on me, but I tapped into the reserve of adrenaline to assess the chaos in front of me. 

Lucky for Bucky, he was holding his own well enough even if his opponent was double his size (but are we shocked? No.), so I moved to the kitchen for a weapon, considering we didn’t have time to prepare before this fight broke out. 

For context, this all started with me coming over here to meet Bethanne for a yoga class she had invited me to this morning. Bucky just happened to be heading home earlier from "work," given that he actually had nothing to do.

Lucky for me because Bethanne had used the excuse of yoga to corner me, and Reggie happened to be home to help, too.

I had played into their casualness to start, feeling the energy off and their disposition askew, and tried to stall for a while, knowing it would be a better fight with my partner nearby. I texted Bucky to meet me at their place with an excuse, and by the time he got there (5 minutes later), the fight broke out, and all curtains were pulled back to reveal the truth.

“Barnes!” I shout, and his head pops up from his position, trying to disengage Reggie. I throw the knife I got a hold of from across the room, and he spins, turning the giant perfectly to where the knife embeds itself in the front of his thigh. 

A yell in pain sounds, and Bucky turns to hold his head in a lock that eventually makes Reggie pass out. 

Silence takes over the space. The only sound is our panting as he looks at the damage and sees the end of our mission come to a close. Whether intentional or not…

“So, that was fun. Glad we got some cardio in,” I huff, pulling my arm closer to my body and putting pressure on the cut. 

“Jesus fuck,” Bucky runs a hand through his hair and walks to me. “Where’d she get you?” 

His hands are gentle and light compared to how he’d been using them the last few minutes. He turns me to the side, using my shoulder as leverage, and bends to look at the gash on my arm right above the back of my elbow. I had been wearing a dry-fit running jacket that clung to me, so the damage wasn’t 100% visible, I’m sure, but the hiss he lets out when he sees it leads me to believe otherwise. 

“How’s it look, Doc?” I ask and wince with a sharp breath when he pokes at it. “Dude. Jagged glass cut. Careful.” 

“Just moved the fabric,” he grumbles, still examining it. In front of us, Reggie groans. We both look at him. 

“We can play operation in a minute. Let’s tie the big guy up, and you can help me get Raggedy Bethanne from the other room in here to interrogate,” I push past his shoulder as I move to get Reggie situated. 

Begrudgingly, Bucky helped me move the sleeping giant and we shut all the blinds and set the space for a controlled interrogation. 

Currently, Bucky is on the phone with Steve, letting him know the plan went awry. We were working on getting information while we waited for a team to come collect the two perpetrators. Steve confirmed he’d send undercover agents as cops for us to wrap up the loose ends. 

In the middle of the call, someone knocks on the door, and we share a look. I’m still covered in blood, but I find a painter's poncho on the side, throw it on quickly, and grab a used paintbrush in the convenient tray next to it. 

“One second!” I shout, making a few marks on the poncho and one on my face for show. I go to open the door, praying I don’t have any blood on my face, but I did well in keeping away from Bethanne’s pathetic attempts of retaliation. 

When I open the door, I see their next-door neighbor, Mrs. Nosy-Nancy Betrum, smiling wearily in front of me. 

“Oh, hello, Charlotte,” she says nervously, trying to peer into the house around me. “Is Bethanne in there?” 

“Oh,” I perk up casually, turning behind me for a second and looking back at her. “She just ran to the bathroom. Is everything ok?”

“I just heard some shouting and crashing and wasn’t sure what was going on,” she started, still trying to peak into the background that I’m mostly hiding, so I moved a little to show the not-as-destroyed part of the house. 

“Oh, she’s doing a kitchen renovation and asked if we could help since we have some experience ourselves. The boys are hauling and dismantling some things. Lots of grunting and noise, I’m afraid,” I cringe lightly to play into the apologetic side of the conversation. “I’ll let her know we’re being too loud.” 

“Oh, ok,” she nodded, seemingly convinced but still glancing in. 

“Char, can you come help me and Reggie with this?” Bucky shouts, and I turn to look at him as he gives me an out. 

“Sorry about the noise, Nancy. We’ll try to be considerate about it. One sec, honey!” I nod back. “See you for Wednesday book club at Katrina’s next week.” I give an award-winning smile, and that seems to seal the deal. 

“Let me know how the finished project comes out,” she waves, walking down the steps.

After I shut the door, I groan as the pain in the back of my arm throbs more and more. 

“I’ll get Beth,” Bucky stands up from where he has successfully tied up Reggie and anchored him to a chair. “You go find a clean cloth and put some pressure on that,” he points out my arm that’s smearing red into the white paint I had tried to hide it with. 

“Good plan,” I nod, hissing as I move to the kitchen to make a makeshift tourniquet. 

_____________

The mission was done. I could sleep in my own bed now. My arm hurt like hell, and I was dreading the unfortunate aftercare and restrictions to come, but the mission was done, and I was headed home. 

After we got Bethanne and Reginald situated, the interrogation started, and they squealed like pigs. Well, Bethanne did, but Reggie didn’t hold out like he thought he would after some convincing with Bucky’s form of torture. Restrained if you ask me…

We had a list of other names to hunt and find. We found solid evidence in their home to prove most of it. Steve and Nat were given puzzle pieces that we had come for originally, so we were on the right path of taking down the organization Fury had been hunting.  

Things worked out for the better, even with the fact that they had successfully hidden a bug, and we were discovered. But there was a reason Bucky and I were picked for this, and we proved that. 

“What’s the diagnosis?” Bucky asked, coming into the med-bay I had been stationed in for the last hour on the Quinjet home. 

“I won’t need a robotic arm, unfortunately. I’ll have to wait a little longer before I can join your one-man club,” I sigh depressingly before I quirk a smile at him. 

“Wouldn’t be a one-man club if you joined it, now would it?” he laughed, sitting on the bed next to me where the nurse finished the stitches and wrapped a clean gauze bandage around it. 

“Thank you.” I nodded her way as she grabbed her things and walked out quietly. 

“Gonna be a minute before you back out in the ring, huh?” he asked, bumping my shoulder. “Sam hasn’t been proving to be the best dueling partner. Maybe since you won’t try to kill me now, you can take up the title? I feel like you’d be a decent match.” 

I turn to him after picking at my bandage and eye him. “Who says I wouldn’t try to kill you still? What’s the good of training if you’re not practicing the real thing?” 

He rolls his eyes and spreads his legs a little more, causing his knee to bump into mine.

“I don’t think you’ll be up for the killing portion of our fights for a bit, so I’ll take the advantage as long as possible.” 

“You think a little scratch like this has held me back from killing before?” He laughed under his breath, and we sat in comfortable silence for a minute. “The team isn’t going to believe I no longer have a vendetta against you,” I whisper. “They’re going to think we’re putting on an act.”

Bucky’s POV:

“I, for one, prefer the nicety over the insults, but that’s me personally,” I say, noticing the nerves in her comment. 

“I’m going to miss insulting you,” she sighs heavily, and I’m shocked at her closing in the space enough for our shoulders to touch. “I don’t have to give it up fully, do I?” 

I take her attempt of trying to lighten the mood and nod. 

“Considering the team is going to give us hell for it, and Steve has a bet we’ll make up in 3-weeks-”

“Wait, make up? I thought the bet was how long until we bite each other’s heads off.” 

“Nat’s bet is. She gave it until tomorrow actually. Steve was rooting for us I guess,” I shrug. 

“Hmmm,” she nods her head as she thinks things through. I’ve seen that look many times. “What if we messed with them?” 

“Channel our energy into keeping the charade going a little longer so neither wins?” 

“You really shouldn’t be betting on your friends,” she grins mischievously. 

“I’m always down for winning a second time this week,” I smile back.

Marvel Tags:

@thejourneyneverendsx​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @death-unbecomes-you @mythos-writes​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​  @srrymydood​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @xa-dia​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @redhairedfeistynerd​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @morganclaire4​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @connie326​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @captain-asguard​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @mollygetssherlockcoffee​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @teenagedreams-bucky @shower-me-with-roses​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @livstilinski @basicallylool​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @starryeyeseunbyul​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

My Lovelies Forever:

@natura1phenomenon​ @lauravicente​ @kakakatey​ @traceyaudette​ @notyourtypicalrose​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​ @sandlee44​ @thorne93​ @thefaithfulwriter1​ @essie1876​ @greyeyedsmile14​ @capsiclehan​  @xostephanie​ @averyrogers83​ @awesomenursingstudent​ @gh0stgurl​ @cs-please​ @jjlevin​ @rainbowkisses31​ @deannotmoose​ @their-bibliophile​ @kitkatd7​ @willowbleedsonpaper​ @mariaenchanted​ @snffbeebee​ @couldabeenamermaid​ @rebekahdawkins​​ @alyispunk​​ @billyseye @hallecarey1​​

Bucky Barnes Tags:

@chloe-skywalker​ @charmedbysarge​ @jbarness​ @bellamy-barnes​ @katiaw2​ @aikeia​ @stopjustlovethemcu​ @enchantedbarnes

Mr. & Mrs. Hunt Series:

@jackiehollanderr @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @theroyalmanatee @wintrsoldrluvr @alexakeyloveloki  @bxckybxrnes24 @lillianacristina @selella @heletsmelovehim @lovelybaka @julvrs @mostlymarvelgirl @heletsmelovehim @learisa @bubblegumbeautyqueen @that-d-bitch @rabbitrabbit12321

[a-ikuoliver]

the black screen lights up, the strength of the vibration of the notification nudging your phone aside an inch, then another, catching it seconds before it slips to the floor, you breathe a sigh of relief. clutching a hand to your chest, you finally check the flashing text that nearly sent your phone below to it's death, your pupils contracting and dilating at the shift in brightness, zeroing in on the text: 'i have to get this off my chest...' your gaze flicks upward, the sequence of numbers at the top of the screen not one you recognised, not one of the many saved to your contacts 'i love you.' your eyebrows furrow at the centre glancing at the number again, who was this?

hi loves!!! in celebration of hitting a milestone i'm attempting to host a collab focused all around anonymous/secret love confessions! an unknown number confessing over text! a note dropped onto your desk from a pining co-worker, an unmarked letter in your mailbox from a neighbour, the faceless person on the other end of the helpline you call, a fan sliding into your dms, a yandere who thinks this is the perfect moment to confess! whatever strikes your interest! onto the fun stuff:

GUIDELINES:

- this is an 18+ event, blank blogs and minors will be blocked if you interact with this event. - all fandoms/pairings/characters welcome - all genres welcome [including dark content; please tag any triggers] - multiple entries/submissions are okay [eg. multiple bakugou/satoru/etc entries from different people AND/OR if one writer wants to submit multiple different works] - please tag me in your work + link this post + tag your post with #io's confessions collab🩷 - no submission due date [i will eventually close the event itself but it doesn't matter when you submit your work] - you don't need to be following me but i'd appreciate reblogging this post when you enter <3 - there is no minimum or maximum word count - love confessions prompt lists [x] [x] [x] + more general prompts under my #「writing prompts」 tag [not necessary but just here in case <3] - special mention to my love @unearthsaturn for all their help MWAH

STATUS: OPEN (closing date tba) HOW TO ENTER:

send me an ask or message with your character/pairing and i'll add you to the masterlist [below]! have your age in your bio before interacting

MASTERLIST | legend: ♡ sfw | 𖥔 nsfw | ਏਓ dark content

JUJUTSU KAISEN:

title tba [suguru getou x reader] | 𖥔 ਏਓ — @a-ikuoliver tw: stalking + yandere themes description tba

title tba [professor!suguru getou x reader] | ਏਓ — @sharkbait-toji tw: yandere themes description tba

BOKU NO HERO ACADEMIA:

BETWEEN THE LINES [sero hanta x reader] | — @unearthsaturn description tba

BETWEEN THE NOTES & HEARTBEATS [bakugou katsuki x reader] | ♡ — @peachsukii — endless nights of studying for exams and listening to music until 3am have paid off as you and bakugo prepare to graduate from college! realizing that his nights spent with you are about to end, he decides the best way to tell you how he feels is through one final playlist.

title tba [todoroki enji x reader] | 𖥔 — @081231 description tba

title tba [midoriya izuku x reader] | 𖥔 ਏਓ — @izuwus tw: yandere themes description tba

title tba [bakugou katsuki x reader] | 𖥔 — @a-ikuoliver description tba

title tba [todoroki touya x reader] | ♡ — @weirdovictor tw: hurt/comfort + heavy topics [self harm + borderline disorder] description tba

all graphics are made by me <3

[redrose10]

Yoongi X Female Reader. CEO/Arranged Marriage AU

Summary: You were selected to marry the wayward CEO/Billionaire/Heir, Min Yoongi. You went into it with an open mind and heart determined to try and make it work. Yoongi on the other hand had no intention of ever letting you in let alone allowing himself to fall in love with you. Slowly you start to associate the smell of cinnamon and vanilla with the feelings of hurt and sorrow.

Word count: 2,531

This chapter will touch on some darker subjects so I highlighted the specific trigger warning in red. In the story it’s not really detailed or any thing and is really minor but I still wanted to make it known just in case.

Warnings: (May get updated as chapters progress): Arranged marriage, cheating/infidelity, hints of smut (Probably won’t get very explicit but we’ll see how it goes), Sexual Assault, Very brief allusion to suicide, Brief mentions of death, Reader grew up an orphan, General Angst, Swearing

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Alright here is chapter 9! Thank you to everyone that has read this story and for the comments and messages. I tried to add everyone to the tag list that I saw but I feel like I missed people and I apologize for that. I was never good at keeping tabs of a tag list.

Tag list: @gimeow @kam9404 @viankiss @baechugff @gaby-93 @kayleefriedchicken

You stared back still in shock from everything that had just happened to you. “Y/N are you okay? Do you need to go to the hospital?”

You shook your head as Yoongi wrapped his suit jacket around you gently pulling you into a hug. The cinnamon and vanilla scent that you’d come to hate was somehow comforting in that moment. After a few seconds he pulled you along with him.

“What about him?”, you asked looking back at the man still lying on the ground.

“Don’t worry about him. I’ll handle it later. Let’s just get you out of here.”

He quickly had a car ready and got you inside while he got in after you advising the driver to head to Jimins.

“Yoongi who was that guy and how did he know so much about us?”

He ran his hand through his already ruffled hair. You noticed the bruise on his knuckles starting to form.

“It’s a really long story Y/N.”

You scoffed, “Yoongi he just assaulted me and knew a lot of my personal information so I think I deserve an explanation regardless of how long the story is.”

“You’re right. Once we get to Jimin’s I’ll explain everything.”

You looked over at him noticing how disheveled he looked. You wanted to reach over and smooth his hair and comfort him, but you decided against it after remembering everything that happened between the two of you recently.

“How did you know where to find me?”, you asked stop kind of surprised that it was him who came to your rescue.

“Well I saw you leave out the front entrance when I was talking to Taemin and I was going to go after you then but I figured you’d want some space so I stayed back. After you were gone for a while I started to get worried and began looking around and then I got a call from Jungkook?”

“You’re intern Jungkook?”

He chuckled, “Yeah, apparently he had met a new friend during the auction and was in the backseat of a car that was parked on the street with that friend and he saw you. He called me and said you were with a guy but he wasn’t sure if you were l with him willingly or not because you looked uncomfortable so I started running towards where you were while I stayed on the phone with him and he kept an eye on you and that’s how I found you. At first I was just going to leave you be because if you wanted to be with another guy I have no right to stop you but when Jungkook said you looked uncomfortable I knew I had to at least check on you and then I heard you telling him to stop and that’s when I decided to step in.”

“Oh well I’ll have to tell Jungkook thanks for looking out for me next time I see him.”

Once back at Jimins you quickly showered and changed into some comfy clothes and headed back towards the living room. Yoongi had borrowed some clothes from Jimin so he was comfy as well and he walked over handing you a mug of warm milk. Smiling you accepted the glass.

After he took a seat next to you he started flipping through channels on the tv.

“Okay Yoongi enough stalling. Tell me what’s going on.”

He let out a long sigh and set the remote down, “Alright, soooo the guy that attacked you is Suri’s brother, Hwan.”

“I’m sorry what?!”, you asked in between coughing on the sip of milk you just swallowed.

He continued, “Yep. I’ve known Suri and her brother since we were kids. We all went to the same school. He’s a year younger than us. Not long after everything fell apart with Mia I developed a friends with benefits relationship with Suri but I was clear from the start that I never wanted anything more. I knew rather quickly though that she was developing feelings for me so I tried to end the relationship but she made an offer. And then I got really selfish.”

“Yoongi what did you do?”

“Remember how I said that at one point I had dreams to be a music producer and rapper?”

You nodded.

“Well Suri’s dad happens to own Bangtan Records, one of the most successful labels in Asia. After trying to break things off she promised me she would get her dad to release my mixtape if I kept seeing her. I know now that I should’ve just walked away but at the time I was hurt and going through a lot of shit mentally and emotionally and I thought it was a great idea. I lost my dream of marrying Mia but maybe I could still achieve my dream of making music. I gave her a copy of the tape and we continued on with our friends with benefits relationship.”

He paused to take a deep breath. You looked at him wide eyed waiting for what was next.

“Anyways after like a year or so she still hadn’t given her dad the tape. I was in a better place mentally and I had started focusing on the company more so I didn’t really care about releasing music at that point. Honestly, I kind of forgot about the whole thing until a few months ago when I told her that I was ending things for good. I told her I was married and wanted to be a better husband and that included not sleeping around with anyone any more. Obviously she didn’t take it well and brought up the tape again. She said if I didn’t continue the relationship that she would have it released.”

You sat there really confused by the whole story and you didn’t mean to let out a laugh but you just couldn’t stop it.

“Yoongi please forgive me for saying this but that seems like a really dumb reason to keep going through all of this. Why don’t you just let her release the mix tape? What’s the worst that could happen? People make fun of you for some cringy lyrics you wrote a long time ago. I mean you’ve embarrassed yourself enough over the years anyways so this shouldn’t be anything new. It would probably blow over in a few weeks and then you could move on with your life free from Suri.”

You realized your words may have been a little harsher than you intended when you noticed the redness of his cheeks. He scoffed, “It’s not that simple Y/N. I wrote most of those lyrics at a really dark time in my life. I talk about hating my parents and the life I was forced into even though I’ve been very privileged since birth and have never had to worry about money or any real world problems. I talk shit about capitalism but now I own a company that feeds into it and runs off of it. I’d be the biggest hypocrite out there. Theres a song where I rap about hooking up with any woman I see and I say something about tongue technology and going to Hong Kong.” You bit your lip to try and hide a chuckle for that one but Yoongi sees it. “I was young and dumb and thought I was cool. Okay?”, he said with raised eyebrows before continuing again, “I mean there’s even a song where I talk about how many times I thought about just ending it all so I wouldn’t have to feel anything any more and I could stop being a failure at everything. If that tape gets out it’ll ruin me and my business and everything that I worked hard to build. We’ll loose investors and business partners which will mean millions if not billions of dollars gone. I’ll be the laughing stock of the corporate world and the company could crumble. I’d be an even bigger embarrassment to my family than I already have been.”

“So what are you going to do Yoongi? Keep sleeping with her just to shut her up?”

“Honestly, after you walked out I thought about it. Not wanting to hurt you any more was the only reason I ended things with her to begin with so if you weren’t going to be in the picture I didn’t see any reason why I should stop. But I just don’t want to do it any more. I don’t want to hurt you any more and I don’t want this to keep hanging over my head.”

“Okay so if you ended things with her then why did she send you that text that I saw at the cabin? About last week being fun and the lingerie?”

“She had been insisting that I either meet up with her or she was releasing the tape. So the week before you and I went on our anniversary trip I did meet up with her just to shut her up for a while.”

You gasped, “So you did lie to me?” He went into panic mode grabbing your hands into his.

“No no no Y/N it’s not what you think. I didn’t meet up to sleep with her. We got dinner at that Japanese restaurant that had just opened down the street from my office. We had a private room and she ended up storming out of the place leaving me there. You can even ask the staff. They saw it all. I told her again that I wasn’t interested in that type of relationship any more and that her and I were over with. I offered her money. I offered her jewelry, or a car, or a penthouse to just go away. She wouldn’t accept any of it. At the end of the dinner she told me that not only would she release the tape but she’d make my life miserable in every way possible that she could, including making sure that you were miserable as well and then she left. She had been texting me like that the whole week leading up to the trip. Different photos and videos and messages. I think she was hoping that you would eventually see the message and get upset which is exactly what happened. I would always just delete them when they came through and never responded to any of her texts but I’m just too afraid to block her right now.”

“And what about her brother? How does he play into this?”

“Well Hwan never did like me to begin with. He’s always had this weird inferiority complex with me. He always has the need to prove that he’s better than me or to have what I have, even when we were younger. Anndddd I also might have slept with one or two or maybe three of his girlfriends over the years.”

You began rubbing your temples, “Seriously Yoongi? Is there anyone in this country that you haven’t slept with?” He just shrugged his shoulders before continuing, “I’m assuming that him and Suri saw it as a winning situation for both of them. They knew that hurting you would hurt me, you’d get upset and want nothing to do with me leaving me available for Suri, and Hwan would also get the satisfaction of taking something or someone that I love away from me so that’s why he went after you today.”

“Okay then and how did he know about Namjoon? He mentioned something about how Namjoon might actually care for me?”

You didn’t miss the eye roll that Yoongi gave at that question but you chose to ignore it in the moment. He ran his hands over his face, “I really don’t know Y/N. I’ve never mentioned him to either of them.” The thought that maybe this guy had been stalking you a lot longer than just tonight made your skin crawl. You didn’t know of any other way he could know about you and Namjoon.

This was all so much information to take in and you could feel a headache coming on but if this had you so stressed you could only imagine what Yoongi felt like.

“Yoongi I’m sorry I didn’t let you explain yourself sooner. Even though I was upset I should’ve at least given you the chance.”

He shook his head, “No no I completely understand why you did what you did. I was really upset too because just when I had decided to try and we were making a little progress I thought it was all going to be taken away from me. I should’ve chased after you but I didn’t want to hurt you any more than I already have. I am really sorry Y/N. For everything. You would be so much better off if you never came here and married me. You deserve so much more that what I can offer. I’m sorry you’re stuck with me.”

You noticed his hands shaking slightly. You gave them a little squeeze being careful to not be too hard on the bruised spot. Rubbing your thumb over the area you whispered, “Thank you for buying that painting for me today. You knew it was exactly what I wanted. And also thank you for, you know, saving me tonight. You really were my hero.”

“So does that mean I get moved up to Harry Potter status now or am I still Voldemort?”, he said flashing you a gummy smile you hadn’t seen in so long.

“Whoah slow down there. You still have a lot more groveling to do before I 100% forgive you for everything and give you Harry Potter status.”

He chuckled, “Understood. I will work on it.”

You sat in silence for a while trying to figure out how to proceed. Finally you asked, “Yoongi she’s blackmailing you which is pretty illegal. Why don’t you just go to the police or get lawyers involved or something? You obviously have the money and power.”

“It’s not that simple Y/N. I signed away the rights to that music so even if I do go after her the label can still release it and then it would be all for nothing with a legal battle on top of it.”

“I don’t know Yoongi. I feel like there has to be a way around this other than you just continuing to sleep with her. Which by the way is not going to work for me, so if you want this to work then we need to figure something else out.”

Before he could speak Jimin walked in dropping his bags at the entrance while being completely oblivious to everything that had happened during the last several hours. He curiously looked at the two of you sitting next to each other while holding hands.

He sat down on the other couch while pointing a finger at the two of you, “Soooo I’d love to know what’s going on between the two of you and why you’re holding hands in my living room right now. But I just saw something even stranger downstairs. Suri and her brother are currently down in the lobby with two police officers. Any idea why?”

[lovebvni]

Winter Themed Pick-A-Pile !! (from 12.21.21)

❍⌇─➭ welcome to ﹀﹀     ︵↷

⌗my blog : ๑ ˚ ͙۪۪̥◌ ⌨꒱

Here are the questions we'll be answering today! Summited by the LOVELY Rozy !!

1. What do I need to do to fully shift?

2. Shifting advice from your spirit guides.

3. Shifting journey for this month.

4. Advice from your s/o.

There will be 4 piles today, all unique, but you can always pick more than one!! But remember, everything comes with a grain of salt because this is an amino with over a THOUSAND people in it. It wont be specific just to you ! Also, if you're unsure, just do this for me.

Take a deep breath in....

Hold for 3

Now let it out and allow your intuition to speak.

The first number 1-4 that comes to mind, THAT'S going to be your pile. If more than one comes, trust it.

[1, 2

3,4]

Pile 1 - With your perfect toes TRIGGER WARNING : DERALISATION IN THE 3RD QUESTION, ALSO DEPRESSION AND MENTIONS OF TRAUMA/SH

Spirit, What does Pile 1 need to fully shift? Like a final push?

The Hierophant (R), The Devil (R) The Chariot

I feel like you guys need to let go of traditions, or routines! You don't need ANYTHING other than yourself to shift, you're powerful! Your doubts, I feel like you're silently telling yourself you'll never shift, You will ! I promise, so STOP telling yourself you're weak, worthless, etc. Then you're gonna STRIVE!

Shifting advice, from your spirit guides !

King of Swords, 2 of Pentacles (R), 10 of Swords (R)

Okay wait, let me say something, I think you're shifting before january 1st... I got 10 of swords and thats like the end of waiting for something. Realize your power, and the good things will run to YOU !! Write a letter to SOMEONE, ANYONE in your dr ! I feel like they'll be really happy about it ! I see an abundance of good luck and success for you guys, just the weight of the world being lifted off you, just so much peace, happiness, love, abundance, GOD I love you guys sm, keep working for you goal ! Just - GOD I LOVE THIS I CANT IM GOING TO CRY!! I FELT MY HEART JUST FLOAT ITS - GODDAMIT I CANT WORDS !

Your shifting journey this month

Page of Pentacles (R), King of Swords, 3 of Swords + Ace of Pentacles

I don't think you guys have that great attraction to this reality... I feel as if you're going to suffer this WHOLE month because of one bad thing that happened, you heart is in pain, you want to end it all, DONT! I see a new beginning for you this month, so PLEASE! Don't stop trying, everything seems like its falling apart, it's not I swear!

General Advice from your s/o

10 of Pentacles(R), The Devil, The Chariot

OKAY WAIT THESE ARE THE SAME CARDS FROM QUESTION ONE??? THE DEVIL AND THE CHARIOT - BUT THIS TIME THE DEVIL IS UPRIGHT...

But they saying stop obsessing over someone/something, like material possessions? but probably not, that only applies to some of you. There's stuff going on around you, and I can tell, that's black energy, let go of it, cleanse it, FUCKING BLOCK IT OUT! That will help you move forward a LOT !!!

I hope this pile made you realize something !! also check this out below !!

IMPORTANT THINGS ABOUT THIS PILE (personality traits, things i kept hearing, important things/people, angel numbers): distractions, shifting for your s/o, love, lack of self-love, misunderstood, determined, "it's set in stone", "It's stuck in my chest", messages, lots of signs, heartbreak, blood,  the colour red, Himiko Toga, Hisoka (bestie idk), derealization, spacing out, ADHD, ADD, attention disorders, stop - no go, WAIT STOP (almost like things you're being told are contradicting), material girl, Air signs, Capricorns, Cancer, Fire signs, 555, 111, 1111

Pile 2 - the deer is gonna start chasing you soon, NOW RUN !!!

Spirit, What does Pile 2 need to fully shift? Like a final push?

The Empress, 8 of Wands, 8 of cups

Realize. I could stop right there, but you just need to REALIZE everything. You are SO LOVED !! You have so many good things coming to you. A union is coming, I can tell your shifting for someone, probably friends and just to have fun.Walk away from ALL the doesn't serve you, things that aren't helping, worthless things.

Spirit, can Pile 2 have some shifting advice?

Ace of Cups, The Lovers, 10 of Wands

Okay, there is a new beginning coming, but you need to realize you need to SPEND TIME with your partner, weather in your cr or dr, I feel like they miss you and feel lieft out rom your life.

Can I know something about Pile 2's shifting journey this month?

6 of Wands, The Empress, 2 of Swords(R)

You're going to win SOME kind of fight !! I feel like you guys are going to get your first shift or a BIG boost of motivation to shift. But you guys are SO FUCKING WORRED ABT IT ! choose where and when you wanted to shift, stop making changes to your script.

Does Pile 2's s/o have any general advice?

The Devil (R), Ace of Cups, 5 of Cups

You're being freed soon! You cup isn't going to be half full or half empty, ITS GOING TO BE OVERFLOWING!! You're going to let go of SOMETHING or SOMEONE and that's going to make such a difference. They love you btw! < 333 Positive energy is coming !

IMPORTANT THINGS ABOUT THIS PILE (personality traits, things i kept hearing, important things/people, angel numbers):  Hunchback, sitting weird, overthinker, Panic attacks, Panic Room - Au/Ra, intuition driven, physic, Cancer, Water signs, 888

OMG PILE 3 IS GETTING MARRIED !!! ROUND OF APPLAUSE !!!

What does pile 3 need to shift? Do they even need to do something?

Ace of Swords (R), Queen of Swords, 2 of Cups

Okay, you guys need to get out your little shitty bubbly and TALK TO PEOPLE !! This will help a lot, I feel like talking to shifters will help, like-minded people are ALWAYS the best to speak to. I know, you're independent, but you can't do everything alone.

We need shifting advice for pile 3, I've been doing this for 4 hours PLEASE -

Knight of Cups, Wheel of Fortune, Judgement (R)

Your prince is coming~ they could also be a princess. Come True - khai dreams, Forest came on so uh.... listen to that  But realize good things are coming to you ! Focus on the best version of yourself, you're a ruler ! You are NOT what anyone negatively says to you, you're amazing.

Pile 3's shifting journey this month?

Page of Swords, Strength, Judgement (R)

If you have the strength, determination, and reality to shift this month, you will.

General advice from Pile 3's s/o's

5 of Pentacles, 8 of Cups, The Emperor

I dropped all my cards during this omg... but major Bakugou vibes. You're going to get everything you've ever wanted and more IF you just TALK, SPREAD UR WISDOM !!! Just make a blog on something, you prob have drafts you should inish it and post it

IMPORTANT THINGS ABOUT THIS PILE (personality traits, things i kept hearing, important things/people, angel numbers): Air signs, independence, introvert, 1010, Denki Kaminari, Hunter x Hunter(listen to the intro song rn), Clumsy

Pile 4, FINALLY, bestie i've been at this for 5 hours

What does Pile 4 need to fully shift?

10 of Cups, Ace of Cups, The Chariot

Go check out Pile 1 after this, but I feel like you guys need to ground yourself. You want to go to one reality, then the next, then the next, in like a dAY this will lead you to move forward with a new beginning.

Shifting advice from your Spirit Guides.

The Hierophant, Page of Wands, The Devil

When you try to shift, look at it like you WILL shift, like you ARE shifting, you ARE in your dr, like you HAVE succeeded !! Any time you get bad news, just be happy, be accepting of it !!

Shifting journey for this month.

9 of Wands, Queen of Cups (R), 7 of Swords (R)

Okay, sadly, you are not shifting this month because of how much you have to changeee, literally I- if you dooooo its because you make a dramatic change quickly. I'd be REALLY suprized if you do shift because you are STUBBORN ASF !!! You're ignoring signs and warnings, stop. Stop.

Advice from you s/o

6 of Wands, Knight of Wands, The Lovers

Socialize, try to get in a better position by talking to others. I feel like you're taking a trip/going on a journey so enjoy it !!! You're going to meet new peopleand you'll be excited, and hell maybe even meet a cr s/o.

IMPORTANT THINGS ABOUT THIS PILE (personality traits, things i kept hearing, important things/people, angel numbers): Disappointed, sad, sorry, Fire Signs, stubborn asses, Katsuki Bakugou

Okay guys! I hope you enjoyed the pick-a-pile!! I do private readings if you need anything ! I hope this resonated !! Again sorry pile 4 for being a bit bitchy but Spirit said what Spirit said, and sorry for everyone going through anything, it will get better soon !!!/gen

[mynameismckenziemae]

A Little Bit Stronger

Part 7

(previous part here, next part here)

Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x OFC

Summary: Bradley is happy to let you try something you’ve always to do. You and Bradley help Jake surprise Reese.

Just like everything else I write/post: this story is for 18+ only. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. It will contain smut, adult themes, situations and language. Please also note this story may be triggering due to the topic of domestic abuse (physical, emotional, sexual) violence-feel free to message me with any questions before reading.

Warnings: Smut, oral (m receiving, mentions of f receiving), a whole lotta fluff, talks of being blindfolded, etc.

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

There’s a pleasant ache between your thighs, soft snores in your ear, and a hardness pressing against your ass when you slowly open your eyes to the early morning sun just starting to come through the windows. The two of you had finally succumbed to sleep a few hours earlier, exhausted from the pleasure you’d wrung from each other.

There had been more passion, more emotion, more feeling in one night of lovemaking with Bradley than in all the years you’d been married.

A smile tugs at your lips when Bradley’s snoring pauses to pull you in closer. Arousal races down your spine and between your thighs when you feel his boxer-clad morning wood against your bare bottom from where his shirt you stole to let Hank out rode up during the night.

“I can’t think of a better way to wake up than with you in my arms,” he murmurs against your neck, his gravely morning voice making you shiver.

“No?” You gasp as he gently sucks on the side of your throat, releasing you before it leaves a lingering mark, “I can think of something.”

“What’s that?” He hums, smiling as you turn to face him.

“Can I try…” you trail off, feeling suddenly shy.

“Anything,” Bradley finishes for you, “anything you want, Shae.”

There’s so much adoration and trust in his gaze, that it has you blinking back tears.

“Okay,” you whisper, gently pushing him onto his back.

“I like it already,” he smirks, but it falls at your wince when you straddle him, “what’s wrong?”

“Just a little sore,” you lean down for a kiss.

“Sorry,” he murmurs with the cutest frown when you pull back.

“I’m not complaining,” you assure him with a small smile before kissing the scar on his jaw down to the one on his neck.

“This okay?” You ask, running a fingertip over his nipple.

“Ye-yeah,” his breath catches when you pinch lightly, just like he did the night before, “I like it.”

“What about this?” You whisper before ducking your head and flicking your tongue over one while teasing the other with your fingers. He gasps when your lips close around it and suck.

“It’s good,” he groans, cock twitching eagerly at your ministrations, precum staining the front of his boxer-briefs. “Fuck, Shae. That-ah! That��s good too,” he pants when you add your teeth, nipping gently.

You smile against his skin before switching sides to see what further reactions you can elicit.

It’s not long before you’re soaked and grinding against his thigh for friction at the sounds you’re pulling from him.

His hands slide into your hair as he grows desperate, more as an anchor than to persuade as you explore his body. Eventually, you continue south, pressing wet kisses to his heaving chest and stomach.

“I love these,” you breathe as you come across the V-shaped muscles low on his stomach, flushing at Bradley’s chuckle when you realize you’ve said it out loud. It turns into a wheeze when you suck a bruise right above the waistband of his underwear before pulling them down.

Your mouth waters at his cock just inches from your face, and the need to taste him far outweighs any nervousness.

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Bradley reminds you, brushing your hair out of your eyes.

“I want to,” you whisper, refusing to give into the urge to look away as you slowly lick up his shaft, reveling in the way he shutters. “Tell me what you like,” you continue, licking down the other side, “I want it to be good for you.”

“Oh God, it already is,” his head drops to the pillow, hands fisting the sheets as you lap at the beading precum before sucking gently on the head, moaning at the salty-bitter taste.

“Yeah,” he breathes, cheeks ruddy, eyes falling shut when you slowly bob your head, getting used to the weight of him on your tongue. “That’s it, just like that.”

His hands find your hair again when you take him as far into your mouth as you can without gagging. He inhales sharply while his thighs tremble as he fights the need to thrust into your mouth when you swallow. You moan and repeat the action when you’re rewarded with another burst of precum.

Your hand replaces your mouth when you pull off to catch your breath, stroking him like you did the night before. “Will you cum in my mouth?”

His hips thrust up into your fist, eyes wild as they fly open to meet yours, “Wh-you want me to?”

You nod before lowering your head again, using your hand to pump him in time with your mouth.

“I-I’m getting close,” he warns as his hands gather your hair into a loose ponytail to watch, “it’s okay if you change your mind,” his tone grows desperate as he babbles, “and-and you don’t have to swallow, spitting-whatever you want is f-fuckkkk!”

You whimper at his drawn-out groan while your neglected pussy clenches as he cums in your mouth.

He slowly opens his eyes to meet yours, inhaling shakily when you swallow. “Come here,” he rasps, pulling you up his body.

You squeak as he kisses you, surprised he wants to kiss you after…that. But you melt at the first swipe of his tongue against yours.

The world spins as he flips you onto your back before sliding down your body and settling between your thighs.

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

The rest of the day is spent in his bed, as well as every other moment the two of you get alone over the next week. When you are apart, you can’t get your mind off of him either.

Reese notices, laughing at the way you flush when she has to repeat herself more than once at work.

The weekend is here again before you know it.

“You got the goods little Kernsie?” Bradley asks on Saturday as Drew climbs into the backseat of the Bronco while you fail to suppress your yawn.

Bradley had kept you awake until the wee hours of the night, and you loved every minute.

You wave to Reese and Jake standing on the porch as Bradley drives off. Jake’s smile is forced, obviously nervous for what’s to come.

“Yeah,” Drew’s practically vibrating with excitement as he hands you the small ring box. “Here Shae, will you hold it until we get there? I don’t want to lose it.”

“Course,” you smile, “are you excited?”

“Yeah,” Drew grins, “Jake’s the best. Do you think I’ll have to give a speech at the wedding? ‘Cause I don’t know if I want to talk in front of that many people. Will I stand on Jake’s side or Mom’s? I’ve never been to a wedding so I don’t know how any of this works.”

You smile and Bradley chuckles as he reaches absentmindedly for your hand on the console.

“I’m sure your mom won’t make-“ Bradley starts.

“Roo! Are you boyfriend and girlfriend now?!” Drew interrupts excitedly, noticing your intertwined fingers.

Bradley gives you an apologetic look but before he can reply, you do.

“Yeah,” you smile at Drew as you squeeze Bradley’s hand, “we are.”

“Yes!” Drew exclaims before smacking Bradley’s shoulder, “I told you she liked you back!”

You laugh when Bradley’s cheeks turn red as he shakes his head.

“This is the best day ever!” Drew sighs with the biggest grin, “Unless my mom says no. She won’t, right?”

“I’m sure she’ll say ye-“

“Yeah, she’ll say yes,” he agrees before Bradley can finish. “Wait, Shae! Does this make you my aunt?” Drew asks, his brow furrowing adorably, “Or do you have to be married for that?”

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

“There!” Drew says excitedly an hour later, “That’s gotta be it! Jake said it’s the field with the yellow flowers.”

“I think you’re right Little Kernsie,” Bradley agrees as he slows the Bronco.

Rows upon rows of yellow daffodils line the field, pretty and bright even with the overcast skies.

“Wow,” you murmur as he parks out of sight, “it’s beautiful.”

“It is,” Bradley agrees, leaning over for a kiss once Drew gets out, “doesn’t compare to you though.”

“Thank you,” you murmur against his lips.

“Come on guys! You gotta see this!” Drew shouts from outside.

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Bradley and Drew race down the rows while waiting for Jake and Reese to arrive. You trail behind, smiling at Drew’s peals of laughter as your mind wanders to thoughts of Bradley proposing, getting married, and maybe having his children someday.

The thought makes you pause, realizing this is the first time in years that the thought of having a baby doesn’t fill you with dread.

“What’s up?” Bradley asks breathlessly as he runs back, Drew thrown over his shoulder. He giggles as Bradley sets him down before taking off again.

“I love you,” you whisper, cupping his jaw before capturing his lips in a tender kiss.

“I love you too,” Bradley smiles as he pulls back when his phone pings. He turns to Drew when he checks it. “They’re almost here, we should be able to stay hidden over by that tree there until Jake’s ready for you.”

“Okay!” Drew agrees before running that way.

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Drew giggles when he sees a blindfolded Reese get out of the truck with Jake’s help.

Once he gets her to the middle of the field and gives Drew a thumbs up, you press the record button on your phone while Drew creeps out of hiding as Jake slips off the blindfold.

Surprise flashes over her face before she bursts into tears. “Oh, Jake.”

There’s no holding back your own tears as Jake starts crying too, murmuring something in her ear for a moment before he gets down on one knee, just as Drew approaches them from behind.

Reese laughs in delight when Drew slips past her to hand Jake the ring, and she nods eagerly before he can even ask.

The sun has been elusive all day, but shines through a hole in the clouds when Jake slips the ring on her finger; a sunbeam highlighting the 3 of them as they embrace.

“I knew he’d make an appearance,” Bradley whispers thickly, yet there’s a smile in his voice.

Your heart pinches in your chest when you lower your phone and see the tears steadily flowing from his eyes.

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

“You knew and didn’t tell me?!” Reese laughs as she pulls you in for a hug.

“Not only did she know, she came with me to approve the ring I chose,” Jake smiles, hugging you next, “thanks again, Shae,” he whispers, giving you a squeeze before he releases you.

“‘Of course,” you murmur.

“God, you’re good,” Reese shakes her head, “I had no idea. We even talked about it last weekend!”

“I’m glad,” you reply, “I would’ve felt terrible if you would’ve suspected anything.”

“I didn’t until he had me put the blindfold on in the truck. I figured he was either going to propose,” she pauses to look for Drew, making sure he can’t hear, “or things were about to get kinky. Though Jake’s usually the one getting blindfolded…”

“Jesus Reese,” Bradley cringes, making you laugh while color rises to Jake’s cheeks.

“Alright alright,” Jake shakes his head, blushing furiously as he grabs her hand before turning to find Drew, “that’s enough outta you.”

“Might be fun,” you whisper to Bradley as you follow them to the vehicles before you chicken out.

“What’s that?” Bradley asks.

“Using a blindfold,” you reply, looking down when you start to second guess it, “maybe? We don’t have to either, I just thought it might be fun. If you’d want to…too.”

He stops walking and raises your chin to look at him.

Your breath catches at the heat in his eyes.

“Oh, I want to.”

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

A/N: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeek! Jake and Reese are engaged 🥹 Shae’s getting bolder too. 😏 Let me know what you think! Also…who’s going to be the one getting blindfolded?

As always, any interaction is appreciated but I LOVE hearing what you think in the comments/reblogs! Seriously, feedback helps me more than anything.

Tagging:

@lexixstewart

@dizzybee03

@its-the-pilot

@hookslove1592

@hisredheadedgoddess28

@atarmychick007

@littlezee80

@k-k0129

@phoenix-rising-starbird-one

@jessicab1991

@djs8891

@lonelysoul50

@mrsevans90

@landpiranha-blog

@bellaireland1981

@shanimallina87

@writtingrose

@fandomology101

@amiets2

@psuedochakra

@lyn-js

@averagereader35

@emma8895eb

@midnightmagpiemama

@blindedbythelightt

@whitewolfsbitch

@that-daughter-of-hephaestus

@sbdunksblog

@glowingtree

@thelightnddarkness

@seitmai

@skathanstewart

@els-marvelvsp

[vladajwrites]

Razor’s Edge

Part One || Part Two || Part Three || Part Four

Summary; Reader moves to Woodsboro for her senior year of high school. This story take place in the setting of the Scream 4 movie. This story is dedicated to all of the girls living through the current Rory Culkin revival. I love and see you. <3

Also available to be read on AO3 here

It's imperative for me to mention MAJOR trigger warnings for this story; blood, violence, sexual content, alcohol usage, and mentions of abusive situations and suicide. I will add and edit tw's as needed.

WC; 5851

Notes; thank you to everyone who has shown their support so far and taken the time to read my work, you are the ones who truly keep me motivated to write. much much love <33

(Not Beta Read)

You woke the next morning in the same t-shirt you had worn the day before, clinging to your skin from cold sweat. Your pants had been kicked off at some unknown point during the restless night of sleep you had. It was hard to recall the exact time you had eventually passed out on top of your bed.

Your phone was ringing somewhere underneath your pillow, causing your entire head to buzz. You groaned, wiping the sleep from your eyes. Irina’s name flashed on the screen as the caller on the other line. You answered the call, pressing the speaker button before dropping your phone on your chest.

“Hi honey, just wanted to let you know my flight made it into Sacramento.” Irina spoke. The passersby’s in the busy airport nearly muffled her voice. 

You picked up your phone again, looking at the time. How late had you slept in? The digital clock read 11:03 am. 

“Okay, I’m glad you made it safely.” You were certain your aunt could hear the rasp of your morning voice.

Irina hummed on the other line. “Just give me a call if you need anything while I’m away.” 

“Will do, love you.” You replied, clearing your throat before responding. 

“I love you too.” Irina replied before ending the call. 

You stared up at your ceiling for a moment, thinking over the events of last night. 

You couldn’t help but feel horrible for Charlie. Were he and his father close? Was his mother around? Did he have any siblings, relatives he was close with? So many questions seemed to fill your thoughts. Though, you knew they were questions that would more than likely go unanswered. It would be an awful choice, you decided, to bring up this suspected trauma unprompted. 

Maybe you could try to divulge more information from your aunt. Based upon her reaction, she must have been relatively close to his father at some point in time. Remembering back to the somber expression your aunt wore last night, you decided against that idea as well. 

You thought back on the relationship you had with your own father. He was an objectively miserable man. How would you have reacted, though, if you had lost him under the same circumstances? It would have surely still been devastating to some degree. 

You’d keep your newfound information to yourself for the time being. It was the only reasonable option you could think of. You were certain Charlie wouldn’t want you to treat him any differently after finding out about what had happened.

The familiar buzz of your phone’s ringer pulled you momentarily from your running thoughts. You grabbed your phone, pushing yourself up into a sitting position on your bed, your legs crossed closely in front of you. 

A message from an unsaved number appeared on the screen. You recognized it almost immediately as being Charlie’s from the group chat the night before. Only he hadn’t messaged both you and Robbie. It was only sent to you. 

You sucked in a sharp breath as you unlocked your phone. The message read, “Hey, Robbie wanted me to let you know he woke up feeling sick and won’t be able to make it tonight.” 

Your face fell into a frown as you read over the message again, your thumbs hovered over the keyboard as you thought up a response. 

Another message from Charlie arrived moments later. “He said he’d take over any revisions if you and I would still be willing to finish the presentation tonight.”

The corner of your lips twitched up into a half smile. Now that you and Charlie were on seemingly good terms again, there shouldn’t be any issue with just the two of you working on this together. 

Your fingers unknowingly found themselves twisted through your hair as you typed your response. “Works for me. Same time and place?” 

Charlie sent his response almost instantly. “Yeah, sounds good.” 

You had quite a bit of time to spare until 7pm rolled around. You went through your weekend routine as usual, cleaning up as you went throughout the home. By 6pm you had showered and pulled yourself mostly together. As you stood in front of your bathroom mirror, running your fingers through your drying hair, a new thought crept into your mind. You couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like to run your fingers through Charlie’s mess of hair. 

Your skin burned hot as you dropped your hands at your sides. You couldn’t bring yourself to look back up at your own reflection. 

You couldn’t shake the thought as you made your way into the kitchen downstairs. You stared blankly into the pantry, your thoughts elsewhere. 

Of course, you had always believed there was something charming about Charlie’s character. He was objectively good looking, at least you had thought so. But, thinking back on those few moments you shared alone with him on the porch the night before, there was just something- something about him was strikingly beautiful. 

You bit at your lip, squinting your eyes as you pulled your thoughts together. You reminded yourself that the last thing you wanted to do at the moment was become wrapped up in unrequited crushes and feelings similar to the sort. It was just easier on your own. You had come to this conclusion years ago. It was understandably difficult to trust others, impossible to let anybody in. 

Just as you were about to shut the pantry door, your eyes caught a glint in the back of the pantry, just behind a bag of sugar. You reached forward, grabbing the bottle in your hands. 

You turned over a bottle of red wine, scanning the label quickly. 

You hummed to yourself, setting the bottle on the kitchen counter. You stared it down for a moment, tapping your foot against the hardwood flooring. 

You had no clue how long it had been stuffed away back there. Surely your aunt wouldn’t miss it too terribly. You glanced up at the clock above the stove which read 6:44pm. A small glass wouldn’t hurt anything, just something to dispel your faltering nerve. 

You dug through the kitchen drawers, searching for a bottle opener. Just as you popped the cork, a knock at the front door rang through the home. ‘Shit.’ You steadied yourself, nearly knocking the bottle off the counter. 

You thought you would have had at least a few more minutes to yourself. You quickly made your way to the front door, taking a deep breath before turning the handle. 

Charlie stood in front of you. One hand buried in his front pocket, the other holding the strap of his backpack over his shoulder. You held the frame of the door, following his line of sight to your bare legs. You felt your face grow hot. You hadn’t realized just how much of your oversized t-shirt covered the small shorts you wore underneath.

You quickly pulled your t-shirt up, holding it against your stomach. “Shorts, promise.” God, why were you acting like this? 

Charlie swallowed, looking up to meet your eyes. “Yeah, right.” There was a moment of quiet passed between the two of you. Charlie’s eyes drifted just past you into the entryway.

“Oh, right. Come in.” You pushed the door open further for him. He followed you inside, stepping beside you as you locked the door behind him. 

He turned to head towards the living room. Without giving it much thought, you interjected. “We can go up to my room.” You motioned up the stairs, watching as Charlie stopped in his tracks.

“Your room? Your aunt won’t mind?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as he kicked his shoes off.

“Oh no, she wouldn’t mind. She’s out of town this weekend, anyway.” You replied.

Charlie froze for a moment, looking up the stairs past you. He met your eyes again before responding. “Cool, yeah. Your room sounds great.”  

You smile down at him, leading him up the staircase. 

“Well, this is it,” you shrugged. “Just put your stuff anywhere you’d like.” You finished, motioning around the room. 

You picked your bag off the ground and climbed into your bed, moving close to the wall. Charlie placed his stuff on the desk beside your bed before dropping himself into the adjoining chair. You began pulling out your things, watching as he intently did the same. He seemed so incredibly focused on the things in front of him. Neither of you spoke. 

As you opened your laptop to access the shared group presentation, Charlie spoke up.

“Okay, I actually went ahead and got everything finished up earlier today.” Your breath got stuck in your chest as you met his eyes. “I figured we could just work on any revisions together.” You could tell from just below your line of sight that he was nervously messing with the corner of a piece of his notebook paper. 

“Oh,” you weren’t sure what to say. “Well, thank you. You totally didn’t have to-”

“No, I know. I wanted to.” Charlie interrupted. 

You nodded, sucking in your bottom lip. You scanned through the presentation. It really had been finished. It must have taken him hours. 

There was an uncomfortable silence, making the air thick and heavy around you. You wished you could think of something else to say. An image of the opened bottle of red wine in the kitchen flashed in your mind. 

“Would you like something to drink?” You asked so softly, you couldn’t have been certain you had actually asked it aloud. 

Charlie’s eyes snapped up to meet you. Relief almost played itself across his expression. “Yes, please. If it’s not any trouble.” He rubbed his palms flat against the denim against his thighs. 

You shot up, crawling out of bed. “Not at all.” You gave him your most reassuring smile. 

You rushed downstairs, throwing open the cabinet where you knew Irina kept her best glasses. You grabbed two by the stem and held the bottle in the other hand. 

You made your way carefully up the stairs, stopping in the doorway of your bedroom. 

Charlie peered behind himself, eyes falling to the bottle in your hand. 

“Oh,” he began, “I didn’t realize…” 

You suddenly felt incredibly stupid. Did he even drink? 

“I’m sorry, I should’ve clarified. I can go and grab some water or something-” You began turning on your heel. 

Charlie was quick to rise to his feet. “No, no, this is great.” He carefully took the glasses and bottle from your hands. You inhaled sharply and nodded as his fingers brushed against your own. 

You climbed back into bed, watching him fill each glass, respectively. You couldn’t help but notice the way his hand slightly shook as he passed you your glass. 

You took a long drink, watching him do the same. It felt so warm in your throat. You sighed, sinking further into the bed. Charlie seemed to relax a bit in his spot as well. 

A few minutes passed by in a much more comfortable quietness. 

You couldn’t help but become distracted by the man sitting beside you. He just felt so far away. You wished he’d have sat on the bed next to you instead. Every once in a while, you’d feel him glance over at you as you reread the same passage over and over again, still for some reason, unable to comprehend what it said. 

You peered up from your notes, watching Charlie slide a scribbled over sticky note that sat stuck to the base of your lamp. 

You recognized it immediately, feeling yourself shift awkwardly. It was one of the lists you kept from film club, filled almost entirely with movies that Charlie had mentioned in passing. 

“Are these…?” Charlie asked, eyes widening as he made his way down the list. 

You rolled over onto your stomach, reaching over to pull the list from Charlie’s hands. 

“Mhm,” you nodded. “I’ve almost gotten myself caught up.” You tried your best to conceal the shyness you felt at being found out. 

Your heart picked up quickly as he looked you over. There was something about his expression that felt so heavy, it was an unfamiliar sight. 

“What’s next on your list?” He asked, picking up the glass you had set down and refilling it alongside his own. 

You read over the scratched out mess of your handwriting. “Dawn of the Dead, but the 1978 version. Not the remake, of course.” 

A smirk spread across Charlie’s lip, as if he’d taught you well. He held up your glass to take from him. You took it from him slowly, feigning to be worried about spilling a single drop. By this point, your head was already beginning to feel fuzzy. It was a comfortable warmth. 

You slipped the note into your backpack, trying to focus once again on the presentation in front of you. It was useless. 

Before giving it much thought, you spoke up, “You know, I’ve already rented it.” 

Robbie could manage the revisions on his own, right?

“Oh yeah?” Charlie asked, turning in his chair to face you. 

“Yeah,” you began, trying to convince yourself that this next question would actually be a good idea. “Would you want to watch it with me?” 

“Tonight?” Charlie’s hands were back against the top of his thighs. His eyes flashed between you and the T.V. that was mounted above your dresser on the opposite side of your bedroom. 

“If that would be okay with you, I’m honestly not getting much work done over here.” You replied, getting up from the bed. 

Charlie cleared his throat before answering. “Yeah, yeah, that sounds cool.”

You smiled over your shoulder at him as you made your way over the DVD player that sat on top of your dresser. 

You messed with the CD case, popping it open and inserting the disk. You picked up the remote, waiting until the title screen flashed on the T.V. above you. You noticed the top drawer of the dresser was pulled halfway open; you slid it closed, scolding yourself. It contained the clothing you’d dread any guest seeing. You swore you were always so careful about keeping these things in order.

You flipped your bedroom lights off, dimming the lamp that sat on the desk beside Charlie before finding your place back in bed. 

You pressed play, finishing the last of the wine in your glass, before setting the remote and glass on the desk beside you. 

A few moments passed by uninterrupted. You looked over at Charlie. He was sitting so unbelievably stiff in the chair, it just seemed so uncomfortable. 

“Charlie,” you called out to him. He snapped his eyes to meet your own. “You don’t have to watch the entire movie from my desk.” You half laughed.

He stood quickly, nearly knocking things about your desk. You tried your best to hide your smile as he laid down on top of the mattress; the bed dipped under his weight. 

You both kept a fair amount of distance between each other. The movie was well underway. However, you found yourself becoming increasingly more interested in the uneven way Charlie’s chest rose and fell with each breath than what was happening on the screen.

You wished you could just reach over and touch him, move the hair out of his eyes, trace your finger over the arch of his nose. 

You could barely take notice of the way your vision had fixated on him as your head grew blurred and warm. 

You wished he’d turn and face you, say something. He seemed to be frozen in place, legs and arms held in a way that’d rival a statue. His face was fixated on the T.V., as if he were too nervous to move even an inch. It was so warm. The room felt so warm.

You could barely catch the small glimpses he’d spare towards you from his peripherals. You wish he’d just reach over- your eyes trailed down to his hands resting on his stomach, watching the veins in them roll as his finger flexed and twitched. 

You reached up, placing a hand against your face. Your skin was cold to the touch. Why did everything feel so warm?

Your clothing suddenly felt increasingly more suffocating. You were growing desperate for some form of relief. You pulled at the collar of your shirt. Your shorts felt so tight, nearly restricting. You couldn’t explain why you felt so hot. The t-shirt you had on could almost be a dress, anyway, right? 

You climbed over Charlie, one hand on either side of his chest. You steadied yourself on the ground, your head thoroughly swimming. You tried your very best to focus forward on the movie. You unbuttoned the waist of your shorts, carefully stepping out of them.

You heard a heavy sigh from behind you; the sound made the hair on your skin raise. 

“I’m sorry, moving out of the way. Promise.” You laughed, turning back to face Charlie. 

You slid into the bed, finding your spot in the small space between Charlie and the edge of the mattress. Opting not to try to climb over him again in your current state.

Charlie froze in place beside you as you shifted on to your side, trying to find the most comfortable spot between him and the screen. He was warm, so warm. You had just felt as though you were burning up moments ago, but the thought of him moving any further away made your body ache. His warmth was soothing. 

You could feel Charlie’s uncertainty as he began to shift away from you in the bed, providing you with more space presumably. 

You couldn’t explain why you did what you did next. You reacted without giving it much thought at all. You reached behind you, pulling Charlie’s furthest hand towards you until it rested on top of your hair. 

The new position forced him to shift in bed beside you until he was lying on his side as well. His hand flexed under your touch. You wished you could pull him closer. 

His fingers stretched throughout your hair and you sighed, feeling your back sink closer to his chest. You could nearly feel his heart pounding against you. Your hand fell to rest on your side. 

His other hand shifted, moving into a more comfortable position below your neck. “Is this okay?” He whispered right behind your ear. The feeling of his cool breath sent chills up your spine. You nodded, the words lost from you.

You reached up, tracing the veins wove through his forearm. His fist closed and flexed at your touch. The film, just as the presentation, was now lost on you. 

It was just him beside you. The way he smelt, his fingers carefully sliding through your hair and across your cheek, the unsteady beat of his heart against your back. You found yourself sinking further and further into his arms. A heavy sigh slipped from your lips as he pulled through the mess of your hair. 

At the sound of your voice, Charlie shifted his weight, wrapping his arm under your neck further to pull you around to face him. 

You both seemed surprised at his sudden movement. You were now face to face, just inches apart. The movie murmured faintly off somewhere in the distance. 

Even in the dark, his blue eyes were so incredibly clear. You reached up, brushing the hair that had fallen in front of his face away. His eyes flitted between your own eyes and lips. You had never noticed before just how full his own lips were. His lips were tinted a deep red from the cherry wine you had shared. You couldn’t help but imagine how sweet he’d taste. 

If you’d just move a bit closer- 

Both of his large hands wrapped throughout your hair again in near desperation. 

You returned the gesture, pushing your thigh through the middle of his own. Lips crashed against one another. 

It was unlike anything you had experienced before. This brash kiss fell into a soft rhythm, gentle exploration as you rocked into one another. 

It didn’t take long until the slow movements devolved into a harsh quick pace as you both grew more comfortable in each other’s arms. There was an air of near violence as your tongues wrapped around each other.

You needed more of him, needed to be impossibly closer in any way you could. Sensing this, Charlie wrapped his arms around you, pulling you on top to straddle his waist. 

You sat back, smiling down at him as he unintentionally bucked his hips up closer to you. It was wonderful seeing the state he was in. You knew you were in just about the same shape. 

You were quick to meet his lips again. He held you steadily against himself, continuing to rock himself against you.

Your hands hazily fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. You needed to feel more of his skin against you. The barrier of clothing that separated you from him made you miserable. 

Once the last button was popped, he sat up in bed. Pulling you up with him, his arm clung around your waist. He shrugged the shirt off of himself, throwing it on the ground. You were quick to bring your lips to his again, running your hands up his now bare stomach. He was impossibly toned, felt hard to the touch. 

“Fuck.” He groaned against your lips as your hips rolled against him. You could feel him getting hard below you. A blush crept up your skin. The sound of his voice like this built up an indiscernible feeling inside of you. You wanted to hear him make that sound again. 

His hands were quick to find themselves under your t-shirt, his thumb brushed against the outer lace of your bra. He reached behind you, fumbling with the clasp. You leaned your head against his, smiling softly as he gazed at you in wonder. 

You reached behind yourself, helping him with his work uncertain work. You slid the bra off yourself, throwing it next to Charlie’s discarded shirt. You grabbed the hem of your t-shirt and pulled it swiftly over your head. 

You could hear Charlie’s breath audibly stuck in his throat as his eyes darted wildly across your body. The full weight of this situation nearly hit you at once. You brought your arms shyly across your chest. You had never been in front of a man this way. 

You could barely meet his eyes. He was quick to pull you back in to kiss him. “God, you’re so fucking perfect.” He whispered against you as he kissed your forehead. Your arms melted down to your side as his hands traced the curve of your waist. 

You could feel his hands shake as he cupped your breasts, his fingers softly grazed against your nipples. You sighed, pulling him closer to you. That frenzied feeling returned in full force. 

You needed impossibly more of him. He was quick to act, laying you back down on the bed. He hovered over you, eyes burning into your nearly naked body in front of him. 

His right hand reached down, fumbling with his buckle. You watched intently as his hand slipped underneath the waistband of his boxers to adjust himself. Your eyes fluttered back as you traced your fingers mindlessly over the defined v-line that led further down his hips. He shook at your touch. 

His lips found themselves trailing kisses down your neck and chest. He was so gentle with you. Painfully gentle. Your hands wove through his hair, arching up into him as his pace quickened. He slid further down the bed, wrapping his arms around both of your legs, holding them open to kiss down your thighs. 

You were practically already coming undone below him. He’d come so close to the spot you wanted him to be. Every time he’d pull back away, you’d whine in frustration. He’d hum back against you in response. 

You couldn’t handle the pressure building up inside you anymore. Your right hand traced slowly underneath the lace of your panties. You stopped just before slipping through your folds, looking up to meet Charlie’s eyes. His expression seemed nearly pained, completely desperate. 

“I don’t know- I’ve never…” Charlie could barely get the words out from between his lips. Even in the dim lighting, you could tell he was flustered, embarrassed at his own lack of experience. It was reassuring to you though, you had practically no experience with all of this either. It was sweet, how shy he seemed at that moment. 

“It’s okay. I’ll show you.” You gave him a reassuring smile before carefully intertwining your fingers with his own. He followed suit, hooking his free hand around your panties before sliding them off you. Your desperation for him drowned out any insecurity you could have possibly felt with him above you in that state you were in. 

You brought his fingers against you, sighing into him as he carefully let you guide him in slow circles against your clit. The knot deep inside you only grew as he became increasingly comfortable. Your hands dropped to his shoulders as he became familiar with the pace and direction you wanted. 

His free arm wrapped around your back, gripping your sides with bruising force as you started to writhe below him. His head dipped beside your ear, “Please, please let me taste you.” He practically begged. 

You could only nod, sucking in a sharp breath as his fingers moved faster, losing their rhythm. 

He was quick to shift his weight as he sat up for a moment, pulling off his constricting jeans and socks, leaving him nearly entirely exposed. You groaned at the sight of him in front of you. He was so damningly beautiful. Your vision flitted down to the large impression in his boxers, your eyes widened at the size of him. 

Before you could process this discovery, he was kneeling on the bed in front of you again. One arm snaked around your thigh as you propped yourself on your elbows to watch him make his way through his. 

He kissed just above your clit, eyes looking up at you for approval. 

“Please Charlie,” you urged him on. 

His lips were against your most sensitive spot immediately. You cried out, screwing your eyes shut. Nothing had ever been so perfect as this. He kissed against you a few more times before deciding to explore you with his tongue, “Fuck, it’s so good.” He groaned against you, speaking more to himself than you. 

The vibration of his deepening voice sent shockwaves throughout your body. Your eyes and legs involuntarily worked to screw shut. Charlie acted quick, pushing your thighs back apart with a painful grip. You were sure you’d have his finger prints bruised into your skin the next morning. ‘Good’ you thought to yourself. 

You could tell he was trying his best to emulate the motion you had shown him with your fingers with his tongue. It was maddening, completely perfect. 

“Fuck baby, you’re doing so well.” The words spilled mindlessly out of you. He groaned as you rolled your hips against him. Your eyes trailed down his chest. His right hand found its way inside his boxers. He was palming at himself as if he were in pain. You wanted to be the one to relieve him. 

The sight of him pleasing himself as he worked you over was enough to nearly send you crashing blindly over the edge. You could barely get the next words out of you, “Don’t, don’t touch yourself.” You were trying to keep it all together as he whined against you, following your demands. 

“Fuck Charlie, I’m going to…” you said between broken moans. 

He pulled away for a moment, his entire expression darkened. It could’ve easily been terrifying in any other context, you noted to yourself. The fingers that had just been wrapped around your thigh found themselves quickly against your entrance. Your eyes widened as you connected with his gaze, realizing his intentions. You’d do anything to have him inside of you. 

He kissed your lips. You sucked the taste of yourself off of him, dragging his bottom lip between your teeth. His middle and ring dove forward inside of you. His other hand came up quickly to muffle your screams. 

“Shit, you’re so tight.” His chest shuddered at his own words. A tear rolled down your face as he talked you through it. “So wet for me.” 

His free hand pressed down against your lower stomach. The additional pressure was the last push you needed. Your whole nervous system seemed to snap as his fingers fucked you through your high. You could barely hear his praise as your ears rang out with incredulous force. You were sobbing out his name, vision white and spotted at the blinding pleasure. 

He pulled out of you carefully, slowly letting you come back to yourself for a moment before diving his tongue back against you. 

You writhed up against the footboard. It was too much, too overstimulating. Your hands pulled at his hair to push him away. He grabbed both your wrists with one hand, holding you in place below him. You were babbling, stuck between ‘It’s too much’ and ‘please don’t stop.’ 

Within a matter of moments, you were coming undone again against his face. Your mind was shattered, your body a wreck under his touch. 

He fell back against the headboard, catching his breath as he watched you ride out your high. 

As soon as you could partially catch your breath again, you sat up, watching him shift uncomfortably from his pressing erection. 

It was his turn to be taken care of. You crawled your way up to rest between his thighs. His eyes darted across your face, as if he were trying to read your thoughts.

You couldn’t hide your smile as you leaned into him. You kissed him slowly, licking across his lips. Your lips slowly made their way down his chest as your fingers grazed across the fabric against his cock. He whimpered above you at the pressure. The sound made your stomach clench. You’d give anything to hear it again. 

He slid further down the bed as your lips trailed kisses and shallow bites marks further down his stomach. 

Once you could tell he was in a more comfortable position, you hooked your fingers into the waistline of boxers. He lifted his hips, helping you pull them down his thighs before discarding them on the ground below. 

You sat back on your heels, mouth agape at the sight in front of you. You could do little to hide your shock at the uncovered size of him. 

You glanced up at him, willing yourself to put on a face that feigned at least a hint of experience. He smirked down at you, as if he could tell exactly what thoughts were passing through your mind. 

“You don’t have to…” he muttered, eyes still full of adoration for you. 

Before giving him the opportunity to finish his sentence, you wrapped your fingers against the base of his cock. You could feel him pulse under your touch. His next words were stuck and gone in his chest. 

You held his gaze as your hand carefully twisted its way up to the tip of his cock. You gathered his precum on your fingers and circled it around the length of him. His mouth fell open as his stomach flexed under you. 

“Does that feel good?” You asked softly. 

He bit his lip, nodding his head yes. You were quick to pick up your pace at his approval.  

His hands were desperate, switching between grabbing at the bedsheets and headboard and any of your skin he could get ahold of. Stunning whimpers and pleas spilled out of him as you found the motion and speed he needed. 

You pulled away for a moment, moving yourself further down the bed. You held him still in one hand again as you kissed a trail down from his navel. Your eyes met with his as your lips hovered above the tip of his cock. You gathered spit on the tip of your tongue and let it fall slowly onto him. He cursed a string of expletives, his eyes rolling back into his head as you took him into your mouth. 

You thought carefully over each motion, keeping your teeth back, hollowing out your cheeks. The sensation was entirely new, but the way he began to convulse below you let you know you were doing something right. You wanted nothing more than to make him feel the same way he had made you. 

His hands wrapped almost painfully through your hair as he bucked further and further down your throat. You tried your best to relax, allowing him to take the space he wanted. 

Your throat burned, tears and spit covered your face and chest. You wouldn’t have possibly wanted it any other way. 

You were both becoming increasingly sloppy and starved in your movements. His right hand grabbed at your throat, pulling your face up to meet his eyes. You stilled, letting him fuck your throat as he pleased. It didn’t take long before his movements stilled and stuttered. 

You felt him pulse in your mouth; you were flooded with his release, warmth coated your throat and tongue. The taste and sight above you made your entire body shudder. It was heavenly. You felt truly blessed to be the cause of it all. You could vaguely make out your name being spilled from between his lips.

His chest heaved as you carefully pulled away from him, his cock falling against his stomach. 

You caught his eyes again, making a show to swallow what he had given to you. He pulled you into himself, kissing all over your face until you were laughing in his arms. 

You dropped into the bed beside him, watching him shift his weight and stand. He scanned the room before spotting the bath towel that hung beside your bedroom door. He made quick work of cleaning the two of you up, tracing kisses across you as he did so. 

Your nerves were all shot. Your entire being was exhausted and heavy. 

He dropped the towel next to the discarded pile of clothing that had accumulated on your bedroom floor. Charlie slid back in bed beside you, lifting the disheveled duvet over you both. He pulled you up onto his chest. You sighed as he swept the hair out of your face. 

You were in a complete haze, halfway into a deep sleep. 

“Thank you,” Charlie whispered above you. 

You hummed, reaching up to kiss under his jaw. “Thank you.” You replied, pulling a sore a leg over his thighs, resting your head back down against him.

The movie’s title screen music played on repeat in the background; you couldn’t be the least bit bothered to turn it off. 

[sacredthethreadgvf]

Limelight | Jake Kiszka x Reader | Part 2.

Word Count: 20.3k

Chapter warnings: SMUT!! Dirty talk, unprotected p in v. Talks of poor mental health that could be triggering. Mentions of family issues and trauma in childhood linked to parents not being available for their children or discouraging them.

A/N: Hey everyone..I am so sorry this chapter took me so freaking long to write out for you. My mental health has taken a turn for the worst over the last couple of months and the burnout as a result has been unmanageable. This story means so much to me and I am so happy that I can finally share part 2 with you. This is lightly edited so my apologies. This chapter can be quite triggering so if I have missed anything, or if there is anything that personally is triggering to you as a reader that I did not heed in my warnings pleaseee send me a message so I can add it to my list. 

Lastly, I have to give the biggest shout out to @joshym who has spent hours with me on FaceTime, been bombarded with texts and vm’s about ideas for this chapter and has encouraged me to continue writing even when I wanted to give up. This story wouldnt be where it was without her support. Alright Ill shut up now, enjoy…

****

September 3rd. 

STARCATCHER

St. Paul, MN.

Getting back into your routine after a short break was easier than you had originally anticipated. You had actually missed life on the bus to an extent. The chaos that seemed to surround the boys and a different venue or city every day held a sort of excitement you couldn’t seem to get in any other aspect of your life at the moment. 

A true taste of the limelight, if you will.

“On the road again! I can't wait to get on the road again!” Josh's boisterous singing and snapping of fingers carried through the white labyrinth hallways of St. Paul's Xcel Energy Center as he sang into the mic for soundcheck.   

The energy surrounding the boys and the team seemed to be back on top of the world after a much needed break. There was almost an electric energy surrounding the venue and it was infectious. You had spent the day running around the city with a few members of the team grabbing last minute snacks, lunches, dinners, and drinks. It had been a busy afternoon and you finally made it back to the venue in time to hear a little bit of the boys soundcheck. 

Following the sound of Josh singing through the white halls you couldn't help but smile to yourself at how good he sounded, his voice carrying effortlessly. You finally paused at the main entrance from the hallway to the stage and stood against the wall, your smile grew. To be honest, you couldn't contain your smile when it came to Jake anymore. The thought of what happened a few weeks ago plaguing your mind. Whatever it was with him felt like the thrill of your life at the moment. You paused and watched his fingers move along the frets, watching closely as he tweaked this string and that, and signaling to his tech to adjust the volume of his guitar.

He looked even better than he had before the break. He had a refreshed look on his face. His energy seemed to be at an all time high as you watched him throw a guitar pick at Sam, narrowly missing his head while Josh continued to belt without sound from the instruments surrounding him. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that you haven't seen Jake in person since that night at the impromptu office party and you two had your heated moment together. You could still feel the burning of his fingertips on your legs and you hated to admit it but you spent almost every night since then imagining what could have transpired if you hadn’t been interrupted. 

You had wanted to reach out to him. You wanted to text him or call him to see how his break was going, see how he was doing but you never had the heart to pull the trigger. It felt wrong. You had to remind yourself that you worked for the man. You couldn't let one heated make out session with a hot guitarist uproot your entire career just because you felt like you were touch starved. 

You laughed to yourself as you watched Sam throw a guitar pick back at Jake and began to giggle as Josh snapped his head in their direction, shooting his younger siblings a warning glare. You finally approached one of Jake's sound techs and stood beside him for a moment, crossing your arms out of habit to guard yourself when you felt out of place or even slightly anxious. “All good here?” You asked, watching as Jake sprinted across the stage and pretended to kick Sam. 

The tech, who’s name you learned was Scott, looked at you and smiled, “Seems so. Just can't keep the guys focused enough to get everything done in a timely fashion.” 

“I am not surprised.” You rolled your eyes and huffed a small laugh. 

“Right!” Scott responded with a small laugh, hooking a string to one of Jake’s prized Gibsons. 

You looked back towards the stage just in time to catch Jake looking at you with a mischievous smile, his sunglasses hiding the rest of his face. He waved at you softly to which you returned and the butterflies erupted in your stomach. 

Fuck, focus Y/N.

You patted Scott’s shoulder, “Well if youre all good here, I'm going to go back and make sure everything is in working order. Holler on the radio if you need anything.” You said, gesturing to the black radio hooked on your waistband.

“Hey thanks Y/N. I appreciate it.” 

“You are most welcome.” 

Your head snapped back to the boys on stage as you heard the first couple notes ring out loudly from Jake's guitar. It seemed like at least Jake had finally found his motivation to focus. Thank goodness. 

***

Just as quickly as the soundcheck started, it had finished. This is when the true chaos began.  Everyone was running around backstage trying to not only wrangle the boys to make sure they were on time for the schedule but also get them ready simultaneously. You had been working diligently setting up snacks and drinks for the night as well as organizing not only the boys dinner, but the staff's dinner as well. 

You were approaching show time quickly and you decided to drop off Jake’s dinner to him personally instead of setting it aside to be picked up when he pleased. Through the grapevine you had heard the first show back after break was the most nerve wracking for him and it was best to leave him alone. But you figured, as his new assistant, you would take the time to drop off his dinner personally and see if he needed any help. Walking into his greenroom, you found Jake hunched over polishing his black stage boots and humming along to a Black Keys song playing through a speaker you set up for him across the room. He looked up at you when he heard you enter the room and shot you a look that had you instantly weak in the knees, “Hey Clover.” 

 “Hello Jacob.” You set the box of food on a table nearby with its respective plastic fork and knife set. Super fancy things for the rockstars. 

“Ooh, I’m Jacob now?” The smile widened on his face which you didn’t believe was possible. “Didn’t know we were on a government first given name basis.” 

“Something like that.” You turned away from him, trying your best to hide the blush on your cheeks and a big smile. 

“So,” Jake closed the tin on his black leather polish. “What have you been up to Y/N?”

“Ooh, first full government name now Jacob?” You taunted him as you set out a few towels to carry to the stage with you. 

“Something like that.” He whispered. You jumped slightly as you realized he had quietly approached you from behind, fingertips grazing your lower back softly. 

You pushed him away and rolled your eyes, still smiling and made a beeline for the case of water and wine bottles set aside in the corner of the room. “Oh shut up Jake.” 

“Don’t be so rude Clover!” He placed a hand over his heart. 

You carefully set a water bottle down on the table and turned to face him, a soft mocking glare in his direction. “You'll survive I think.” 

“Don't be such a brat either!” His jaw dropped but there was a gleam in his eye. He missed this with you, the banter, the flirting, how you always had a non stop pink tint to your cheeks around him, it made the zipper on his pants feel extra constricting. 

You had decided to ignore Jake’s flirtatious remarks in lue of the time. “Alright c'mon and eat, we need to get the ball rolling here.” You snapped your fingers and pointed to your non-existent watch on your wrist. “Times a tickin!” 

Jake saluted you and gave you a soft smirk, grabbing the to go box and settling back onto the couch comfortably. He watched unabashedly as you exited the room in search of Rose for some odds and ends before the show started. He shamelessly pulled at the crotch of his pants a bit before getting comfortable enough to eat the wrap he had ordered. 

***

Not but an hour later and after many silly runs back and forth between respective green rooms you heard the final call over the radios.

“Time to deliver the package to the stage.” 

You stood outside of Jake’s green room leaning up against the white painted brick walls that resembled your old school hallways. You knocked three times on the closed door signaling it was time. Jake opened the door moments later, sharing a soft smile with you and a head nod as a signal to you now that he was ready to go. He was clad in a new black suit. A suit you weren’t aware was making a debut this evening. You had seen it before, tucked away on a hanger when you had been at the office mere weeks ago. But actually seeing it on Jake. Well, this was a different story. 

The shoulders were covered in rhinestones and glass beads alike and fuck he looked good. Your eyes widened at the sight of his strong chest and his bare stomach displayed against the black satin. The matching black pants hugged him in all the right places as he walked by to meet up with his brothers. You were still perched up against the wall, mouth slightly agape as Rose approached you, “Ready?” 

You were startled and quickly shook your head, “Absolutely!” 

You watched as the boys began to walk ahead of you, pushing each other against walls and laughs filling the air. You knew by now that this was the last moment of fun before they dialed in for the night.

The chorus of classical music became louder as you approached the stage through the same hallway and gate as you did earlier. The boys’  usual pre show antics died down as well as any casual discussion amongst team members. Flashlights began to light the way as you approached the entrance to the stage in the dark and this is the moment you also dialed in on your heart racing in your chest. Even though you weren’t performing you held a sense of nerves for each of the men in front of you as they passed briefly, Josh getting his mic, Sam his bass, Jake his guitar strap and pick and Danny his first set of drumsticks for the evening. 

You watched Jake as he adjusted a few dials on his Gibson, placing the guitar pick between his teeth as he followed his brothers up the stage steps. This is the moment the adrenaline hits. 

Jake turned his head towards you for a brief moment as he made it to the top of the platform standing next to his brothers.  He gave you a curt nod and a smile and you returned it with a thumbs up before he turned his head forward, facing the back of the curtain.

Showtime. 

The screams became louder as you watched the lights dance across the curtain in front of you, the sound of the orchestra picking up. You looked over at Rose and smiled as she patted Josh on the back and sent him away. A few moments later, the curtain fell and the screams from the fans were the only thing you focused on. You couldn’t help the smile that broke across your face as you watched the boys pose and prepare for a night of revelry. 

*** 

The first show back has been going smoothly. You still held a certain anxiety that you wouldn’t be prepared for Jake but you seemed to have found a dynamic with him pretty quickly throughout the first half of the show. Thankfully it seemed like his ques for more wine or a towel or even a new guitar pick had been more apparent than what you had originally dealt with. 

Okay here's your cue, here they come. 

You thought to yourself as the first half of the show came to a close.

Josh stepped off the stage and made a bee line for Rose. Sam ran shortly after him and had already exited into the hallway to head to B stage before Jake even stepped foot off of the stairs. It wasn't until you two were hidden away from the prying eyes of the crowd that he allowed himself to touch you. 

“Hey Clover,” He bumped his shoulder against yours, the sharpness of the beads on his shoulders scratching at your skin briefly. “How are you enjoying the show?” 

Your mind was running a million miles an hour, too focused on getting Jake situated for his B stage appearance to even give yourself time to acknowledge the fact that his knuckles were currently grazing your bare thigh underneath the bottom seam of your shorts as his arm swayed back and forth. You glanced sideways at his face finally and watched as he brushed his other hand through his hair, the sweat pooling on his hairline and a few strands of his hair sticking to the side of his face. You handed him a towel and watched shamelessly from the corner of your eye as he wiped away that sweat.

“I always enjoy the show!” You pulled the ice cold water bottle dripping with condensation from the little bag you were carrying and cracked it, handing it off to him.  

You heard him hum as he took a long swig from the bottle, “I know, you can’t seem to take your eyes off of me.”

Fuck.

You both slowed your walk a little bit through the hallway as you both realized you were approaching the gate to exit to B Stage. You finally looked at him now that you had slowed your pace together and realized how much he had actually been sweating. 

“Come here.” You turned your body towards him.

“What? What's wrong?” 

“Look up for me.” You dug through the little bag and pulled out a cotton ball and a mini bottle of micellar water. You reached out and began cleaning up some of the dripping eyeliner that started to run from his sweat. 

He flinched slightly and began to swat your hand away. “Woah! Why are you doing that?” 

“Relax, your eyeliner is running.” 

“Don't we want the eyeliner to run? Makes me look more rugged and more like a pirate, no?” He couldn’t contain the smile that was breaking across his face, as much as he was trying. 

You rolled your eyes, “You’re borderline pirate and looking like you just went through a messy break up. Just let me fix this spot.” 

“Whatever Clover.” He rolled his eyes and continued to cooperate with your request. 

“Alright, that should do it, here.” you held out a second fresh towel to dab away any sweat that had been collecting on his neck that he had missed while you had begun to tuck your supplies away in your book bag.

“Hey Clove? Can you hold this for me?” He asked out of nowhere. There was a glimmer in his eye as you realized he was holding a white rose. Wherever he had that tucked away, he had hidden it pretty well.

“What's this?” You blushed. 

You watched as Jake wiped his forehead and neck with a fresh towel you had just handed him in exchange for the white flower. “It’s a rose?” 

You rolled your eyes. “Thanks captain obvious, I mean why do you have it?” 

“It’s for you little Clover. A token of my appreciation for all that you do for me s’all.” 

You blushed furiously at the nickname and the sweet gesture he bestowed upon you. “Where the hell did you even hide that anyways?” 

“Dont worry about it.” 

Damn that cocky smirk of his.

As the drums faded away in the background and the screams of appreciation from the crowd died down on the other side of the wall, you could hear the beginning notes of Unchained Melody carry through the venue. Jake stepped a little bit closer to you as he began to walk by, his fingertips trailing across your back as he leaned down and kissed your cheek softly, “Missed you Y/N.”

Your heart pounded in your chest and your jaw dropped as you watched him walk away and take place next to security at the foot of the stairs to B-stage. You were in trouble. 

***

You figured after a successful, jam packed busy day you would have no problem on your first night back sleeping on the bus. Yet here you were, tossing and turning without any luck. You just couldn't sleep. The constant rocking of the bus, the motion from the hard pavement below underneath the tires, the snores sounding from around you, all of it. You rubbed your eyes and grabbed your phone from the side pocket of the bunk where it was safely tucked away, the screen blinding you momentarily as you unlocked your phone. 

3:15 AM. 

You figured you would just give up on sleep at this point. You only had about a 5 hour drive until you arrived at your hotel in Chicago and just figured you could just rest on this day off. Jake would understand and you were certain he wouldn't mind leaving you alone to catch up on some rest if needed. 

You sighed softly as you grabbed your headphones, the current book you were reading and slowly and as quietly as you could you crawled out of the top bunk, your big toe painfully balancing on a bunk below you as you stepped down. You were grateful for the blue lights that illuminated the walkways in the bus and the fact that this bus had a second story lounge. How in the hell that even fit up there, you hadn’t a clue but you were about to argue with anyone about it. This allowed sleeping quarters and recreation quarters, which was perfect for moments like this. Maybe you'd even be able to watch the sunrise this morning from the front of the bus. 

You padded quietly through the hall and made your way to the very small staircase and began your descent, the only sound around you was the wind whipping by and the soft snores coming from a few of the bunks. You sighed softly and smiled to yourself as you found the empty booth with the big window at the front of the bus on the upper level. You settled into your spot and opened your book, instantly regretting not bringing your blanket and pillow with you for comfort yet refusing to go back down in case you might disturb anyone. 

Some time had passed and you had been a few chapters into your book at this point when the sound of someone clearing their throat across the room made you jump out of your skin. 

“Well, what are you doing up Clover?” Jake smiled at you softly. He grabbed a small water bottle from the mini fridge a few feet away from you and took a few sips. He was so casual as he leaned against the counter. 

You gasped and removed the hand that had jumped to your chest, “Jesus Jake! You scared the shit out of me!”  

“My apologies Clover.” He slid into the booth across from you. “What are you reading?”

Your face flushed hot and your eyes grew wide . “Oh..nothing, uhm..it's just some fantasy story.” You hadn't the heart to tell him about the raunchy words that you had just been reading. The book had quite the plethora of smut tucked away in many pages. A guilty pleasure of yours that you hated to admit.

“Just some fantasy huh?” His eyebrows raised and you watched as his tongue peek out and meet the lip of the water bottle before his lips closed around the opening. Stop staring like a weirdo Y/N.  “I like fantasies. Could I read it after you? I need something new.” 

Your throat went dry, “I don't think..I don't think this is your cup of tea really Jake.” 

“Why's that?” He reached over to the book and lifted the cover to peek at the artwork. 

“I just-..” 

“Spit it out little Clover, cmon.” He smirked as he withdrew his hand. 

“There's a lot of uhm,” You averted your gaze to anything but his face and your voice lowered to a whisper. “There's a lot of…sex.”

“What was that?” Dammit Jake…

You cleared your throat softly.“There's a lot of sex.” 

His head turned sideways, almost inquisitive. “And who said I didn't like sex?”

Your mouth opened and closed a few times but words seemed to fail you. Being in Jake's presence, even thinking about sex in his presence, it felt dirty. It made you feel hot in all the wrong places for your own boss.

“Just let me know when you're finished with it, I think I will enjoy it.” He tipped his head back and finished the water bottle. You watched his hands as he crushed it effortlessly between them, twisting the cap back on the top after it was flattened. “Why are you awake?” 

“I could ask you the same thing.” You removed the book from the table in front of you, away from prying eyes. 

“I asked you first.” He leaned back and smirked, toying with the empty ball of plastic in front of him.

You rolled your eyes slightly. “I'm still getting used to the whole ‘sleeping on a tour bus’ I guess. The bunks are uncomfortable, I feel like I'm sleeping in a coffin and the motion sickness doesn't help. Even with the Dramamine I've been living off of.” 

“You will have that with this lifestyle sometimes,” He gave you a sympathetic look. “I'm sorry Y/N. You really  should try and at least get some rest though, it’s only day one.” 

You nodded, “Unfortunately I do not think that is in the cards for me this evening.” 

Jake hummed. 

“You never answered my question.” You said. 

“Ah,” He fiddled with the empty water bottle again. “I too cannot sleep this evening. I guess I'm a little wired after tonight's show.” 

“The crowd was electric tonight.” You confirmed.  

“They were indeed.” 

A tense silence fell between you two, like you were testing each other to see who would speak first. Naturally, it was Jake who broke the silence and you took note of how he nervously brushed his fingers through his hair for a moment.  

“Hey, wanna watch some tv with me? I used to watch cooking shows when I was younger and had trouble sleeping…but if that's not your forte, we can watch a movie or something.” He gestured down towards the back of the bus where a few couches spread out along the length of the bus and a nice sized plasma tv hung off the wall. His rambling was cute.

“I love cooking shows.”

***

Thankfully, Jake knew where some extra blankets had already been stored by the couches to bundle up on the bus since it usually ran cold for the best nighttime sleeping. He had turned on the Food Network and you two were settled on opposite sides of the little loveseat watching Chopped. 

“Do you really think they don't know what is in a basket before they open it?” You asked, popping a piece of popcorn into your mouth.

Jake's brows furrowed as he chewed, “They have to have some kind of idea because there's no way they can make these gourmet meals in 20 minutes out of random ingredients.” 

“Right! I mean, power to them if they truly don’t know. I don't think I could come up with a meal like that out of the blue and make it fancy.” 

You two fell back in a comfortable silence as you watched the cooks move across the screen. You hated to admit it but your body ached for Jake to be close to you, as much as you tried to deny it. His cologne was once again invading every one of your senses and it was intoxicating. With the way you were angled you were able to make small glances at his side profile discreetly. Or so you thought until his eyes met yours and he broke out into a smile and shook his head. Your heart dropped into your stomach.

“Got a staring problem Clover?” He grabbed another handful of popcorn from the bowl placed perfectly inbetween you. Cocky bastard.

Your eyes widened, “Huh?” 

“Don't play dumb with me. I could feel your eyes burning a hole in the side of my face.” His voice dropped a whole delicious octave as he smirked and tipped his head in your direction.  

“I don't know what youre talking about Jakey.” You tried to hide the smile that broke across your face as you looked back at the tv screen. 

“Oh I'm Jakey now huh?” 

You rolled your eyes, “I guess it's rubbing off on me from the others.” 

“Hmm.” He smirked again and you felt him shift from his spot on the couch next to you slightly .

“C’mere Clover.” He cleared his throat and whispered, your head snapped in his direction. He had positioned himself so his left arm was hanging on the back of the couch facing you a bit more and he had opened the blanket that was placed on his lap prior, offering a clear space for you to snuggle up.

“Huh?”

He rolled his eyes and smirked, “I know you're not deaf either.” He began moving towards you and your breath caught in your throat as you felt his hands find their way under both of your thighs and another around your torso gripping tightly. “I said. Come. Here.” 

Your heart was racing wildly in your chest as he settled back down on his side of the couch with you now tucked into his side. He threw the blanket over both of your laps now and one of his hands rested across your thigh. You still had a perfect view of the TV from your position but now being unable to see Jake, you felt uneasy.

“Much better,” He whispered against your ear. “I was getting a bit cold and you looked uncomfortable over there.” He paused to tuck your hair behind the same ear he had just been speaking into. 

Your face went hot and you sat rigid in your position against Jake. This felt way too intimate. You two hadn't had the chance to talk about or acknowledge the heated kiss you had shared a few weeks ago in the darkroom. This was toeing the line of downright inappropriate for a situation with your boss. But it felt way too good in the moment that you couldn't help yourself, you had been craving his touch for weeks now. Spending many lonely nights in your apartment back in Nashville wishing that he was there next to you, just like this.  

“Relax Clover,” Jake's fingertips brushed along your thigh, inching closer to the inside. “‘S just me. No need to be so tense.” 

That's the thing, you thought. It's you Jake..

You focused on the cooks on the screen, scrambling about to finish their tasks in time. You were hyper aware of every movement Jake was making, down to each one of his breaths filling his lungs with oxygen. Oxygen that you felt you needed so desperately. Your head was still swimming  and you were slightly uncomfortable in your position but your skin felt alive so you didn't dare to move an inch. You counted as the minutes ticked along before you felt him take a deep breath behind you, “Clover.” 

You turned your head ever so slightly and felt as his lips made contact with your cheek, the softest touch of them dragging across your cheekbone. Goosebumps spread across your arms and legs. You closed your eyes and sighed softly as you tilted your head in his direction. You wanted him at this moment. You wanted all of him, no you needed him. You didn't care anymore that he was your boss. You didn't care about the possible repercussions the two of you faced every time you found each other alone in a secluded area. Your back arched closer to him as his fingertips brushed the apex of your inner thigh. Fuck all inhibitions, he was downright addicting. 

You became suddenly aware of the fast movements his hands were making towards your core as his fingertips traced light circles against your inner thigh. He was getting dangerously close, so close to where you needed him most. You took a chance to look back in his direction to find his eyes half lidded watching you closely. From your angle it would be so easy to continue tipping your head to the side and kiss him. The feeling of his breath against your lips as he struggled to keep his own composure. The throbbing became more intense as his fingertips brushed along the band of your underwear hidden away underneath your sleep shorts. Your skin felt like it was on fire. 

You couldn’t help but mimic his actions and turned your body to face him better, your fingers immediately finding the edge of the waistband of his shorts. The feeling of his soft tummy underneath your finger trips with a little trail of coarse hair made your legs clench together at the thought of what he even looked like without clothes on. His breath began to stutter and his fingertip finally dipped underneath the hem of your panties, grazing the soft mound of skin. 

Your confidence grew as you felt how hard he was, straining against his own pants. All for you. You had accidentally grazed him, to which he jumped slightly in reply and a soft groan escaped his throat. You clenched around nothing at the low growl that vibrated against your ear. Before he could move any further you fully grabbed into the head of his throbbing cock in his pants, the girth alone making your core clench. 

He let out a longer groan this time, his head tipping back for a moment before his half-lidded eyes met yours again. “Wrong move sweetheart.” 

His hand that was dangerously close to toying with you snaps up to your neck and grips you roughly. You gasp as his lips make contact with your cheek again and move quickly over to your ear biting it with enough pressure to elicit a gasping moan from your throat. 

More, more, please dear god more…yes…fuck.

Someone cleared their throat. 

You lept out of Jake’s arms just as quickly as he had already been pushing you away towards the other end of the couch again. Your heart hammering in your chest. 

Both you and Jake made eye contact with Danny who was smirking wildly, eating a pack of gummies. 

“What do we have here?” 

Fuck. Fuck no, no.  

Your eyes snapped to Jake whose face was giving away the fact that he probably had the same thoughts before you both looked back at Danny. You felt like a puppy with its tail tucked between its legs. 

This could cost you your job. 

Not just with Greta Van Fleet but at your firm as well. You felt sick. 

“Danny, listen man..” Jake was rigid. 

He held a hand up after he popped another gummy bear into his mouth. “Look, honestly I could give a shit  less, let's be real. Just, be fucking careful for goodness sake.” He leaned down to grab a water bottle from the fridge. “You’re lucky it’s me who’s up right now and not anyone else.” 

You took a chance to look towards Jake again, his eyebrows furrowing and his mouth now in a tight line. You made note of his knee bouncing with anxiety. You still felt like a deer in headlights yourself. 

“Just promise me you won’t do this on the bus again. At least try and hide it between you two.” Danny pleaded as he crushed the plastic water bottle in his hands. 

Jake rubbed his nose and stole a glance in your direction, “You have our word.” 

September 6th. 

STARCATCHER

Chicago, IL. 

The speakers boomed wildly in the arena. The screams from fans either shouting their graces or singing their favorite lyrics at the top of their lungs filled the air around you. You closed your eyes for a brief moment on the side of the stage and took a deep breath. You began humming along to one of your favorite songs that was booming through the arena speakers that you learned quite well since you started working with Greta Van Fleet. You focused on the notes from Jake's guitar more than anything if you were being honest. Opening your eyes you couldn't help but immediately follow his figure on stage. Watching him live out his dream he had told you started in his parents garage many years ago that took off, what felt like, overnight. 

This right here. This is why you did what you did. 

Music was your true passion, but being able to watch the friends that you made along the way live out their dreams, to see people live up to their true potential and become recognized for it? It made your chest ache with pride. You couldn't be more proud of the four men on that stage in front of you. You couldn't be more proud of Jake. 

You hadn't talked to Jake about that night on the bus. You had a moment of tension after Danny retreated back to his bunk after his late night snack escapade, but Jake quickly broke it by sending you a soft smile and suggesting to follow what Danny had mentioned and that going to  bed would be a good idea. He had been acting bashful, like a child who was just caught stealing the candy out of the candy drawer, but he acted no different towards you. In fact, he had kissed your cheek briefly and cracked a joke about being more cautious. He had a knack for easing your anxiety, assuring you that Danny wouldn't tell their tour manager but to probably keep things at a minimum between the two of you for now. 

You had officially given up on trying to deny your feelings towards him. The way he carried himself on  and off stage was something you weren't even aware that you were looking for in a romantic partner. He was kind, funny, confident yet shy in an endearing way, and god dammit was he good looking. You knew it was so wrong to feel this way but you were almost sure that he felt the same way too. 

He had been stealing glances your way tonight on stage and where you were looking for his signals for more wine or another towel, you found none. Instead you found smiles, soft eyes, and the occasional wink sent in your direction. There was no denying it. You weren't in a rush to ask him what was going on between the two of you, both out of your own fear of abandonment and not wanting to label or ruin what you had going for you. It was light and fun and fuckin hot. The random moments like the one you shared on the bus a few days ago, you loved the insatiable feeling that was building in your chest. You smiled briefly and bit your lip remembering the feeling of Jake's fingers so close to where you needed him and looked down at your shoes, hiding the emotions written all over your face. It was clear as day you were a million miles away and with Rose standing so close you feared she would turn and catch you blushing wildly. 

You looked down at your watch and noticed the time, matching up with the music you knew the boys would be off stage soon and post-show chaos would reign once again. Usually, for reasons you still couldn't understand, the boys would have what you liked to call “post-concert zoomies”. How the hell they had so much energy after working their asses off, you had no clue, but usually one or two or all of them would end up in some sort of mischievous activity to finish out the night. You tapped lightly on Rose's shoulder to get her attention. “Hey, Im going to sneak back now and tidy up a bit so we can get the fuck out of here tonight at a decent time. Is that okay with you?” 

“Absolutely of course it is, I'll keep an eye on Jake for you.” 

“Thanks.” You patted her shoulder and made a beeline for Jake's dressing room. Trying to help Rose wrangle these men as well as try and clean up and avoid distractions from Jake after a show had proven to be quite difficult since the break. It seems all the energy they restored was now tenfold and making you and Rose stress more than usual to stay on time with bus calls at the end of the day. 

You opened the door to Jake's dressing room and started tidying up by folding random clothes and sorting them into piles, cleaning up the makeup station and throwing away the random food boxes from dinner. The roars of the crowd became louder and then ceased after a moment or two, signaling the end of the show for the evening. By the time you heard the boys coming through the halls, Josh talking at a higher volume than the rest, you had just set a towel aside with Jake's shower items for him on a blank counter. 

“I'll catch you guys in a bit.” Jakes tilted his chin up to his brothers before locking eyes with you in the room. 

“Hey Clover,” His smile bright and his eyes gleaming with the overhead lights, you took notice of the long stem white rose he was twirling between his thumb and first two fingers. “Forgot to grab this for you earlier.” He walked towards you slowly and presented you with yet another white rose. 

Your cheeks go aflame and you cannot contain your smile. “That's three roses now, I'm losing places to save them Jake.” You bring the flower up to your nose and inhale its scent as Jake pulls off the black jacket and lays it on the couch. 

“Where have you been hiding them anyways?” He shoots you a questioning look. 

“I have my places, away from the prying eyes of anyone else.” 

“Ahh, I see.” Jake flitted around the room effortlessly, gathering up little personal items and then grabbing his items to go shower. That weird moment of tension settling through the air again. You wanted to ask Jake about the kiss, the bus, his actions towards you. All of it. Your head began to swim at the thought of his possible responses or reactions. 

He had been so flirty with you still but did he mean anything by it? He hasn't brought up what happened between either of you as well. Did that mean he regretted it? 

“Y/N!” Danny's voice rang through the doorway. Your saving grace you suppose. “Do you have any makeup remover? Rose is low I guess and she said she has to save it for the diva.” 

You giggle and glance over to the otherside of the room to see that Jake had already retreated to the shower. “Uhhh, yeah, yes I think I do Danny.”

You stood from your spot on the couch and made your way to your bag digging out the extra bottle of micellar water and a pack of cotton balls and you handed them back to Danny across the room. 

“Thanks Y/N.” He nodded at you. “Hey by the way, I think we are all meeting in Josh's dressing room in a little bit for a few drinks as a celebration. You should join us!” 

You smiled at him and crossed your arms, “Sure, I just have a few things to finish up here first with Jake and I'll be there. What are we celebrating?” 

“Jake is starting another band with a few of our close friends and things are falling into place. I think they will actually be opening for us for a few shows looking into next year. He hasn't told you about it?” Danny's brows furrowed. 

“Wait really? No, no he hasn't.” 

“Ask him about it if you dare, he's super excited.” Danny winked and closed the door as he turned to make his exit. 

A new band huh..

You smiled to yourself softly at the thought of Jake's love for music and his dedication. You don't think you have met someone so passionate about their craft yet and it excited the butterflies in your stomach. You settled onto the cool leather couch in the green room and opened your laptop, you had a few invoices to log for Rose for the day that thankfully would not take too long. The sound of packing up outside the doors, keys jingling, people yelling commands at one another all quickly became background noise to you as you typed away in the excel sheet designated for you and Rose. You had been so focused on your computer screen you had not heard the creak of the bathroom door as Jake made his exit from his shower. 

Your only cue was seeing nothing but wet skin and a crisp white towel in your peripheral. Your heart caught in your throat and you sucked in a sharp gasp, hoping that it wasn't loud enough for Jake to catch it. You felt like a deer in headlights, his towel left little to the imagination. You slowly studied his chest down to the little patch of previously shaved hair on his pubic bone, his hair dropping and the water rolling down his skin. 

Your eyes darted to his face last and while he hadn't been looking at you, you could see the smirk he was once again trying so hard to cover. “See something you like, Y/N?” He placed his jeans and belt down on the counter across from you.

Your mouth was agape without realizing it, “I…uh-…oh holy fuck…I’m so, so sorry Jake.” You quickly shut your laptop and stood to make your way out the door.

He cleared his throat and you watched the skin across his knuckles tighten shamelessly as he gripped the towel tighter. You could ever so clearly make out the shape of him hidden away behind the cotton towel. The thought that it shouldn’t be that easy to see such a thing made your mouth run dry and your core begin to pound. You stood quickly, making haste to the closed door. 

“No, wait.” he said breathlessly. 

“Y/N,” Jake took a step towards you and you both froze again. “Clover..” his opposite hand holding the towel raised slightly like he was trying to calm a wild animal that had approached closer than anticipated. 

“Dont.” 

Your hand paused on the door handle of the green room, unsure why you listened but every cell in your body felt like you would comply with any word that passed those soft lips. 

You turned back around and faced Jake slowly only to find he was now closer than before. You could smell his old spice shampoo and body wash surrounding you. You watched as a droplet of water ran down the side of his forehead, down his cheek and finally dropped off the bottom of his chin. He looked sinful all wet like this. His hair was slightly slicked back with a few pieces still sticking to his face. As he took a few more steps towards you, you could feel the heat from the hot shower radiating off of his skin.  

“Clover.” He repeated, more softly than before. 

Your eyes unintentionally dropped to his lips then quickly snapping back up to his eyes. You watched as he lifted his hand and felt the brush of his finger on your cheek, wiping away what you assumed was a bit of your mascara that might’ve flaked off during the day. 

His eyebrows furrowed and you took a moment to admire the soft pout of his bottom lip as he flicked away the little black speck. Goodness, you wanted to feel his mouth against yours again. 

His eyes lifted back to yours and he walked towards you and pushed you back against the door with a soft thud. Your breath ceased to exist for a moment. You watched intently as Jake’s eyes flickered down toward your lips. He was moving closer to you, intent on kissing you which was apparent by the way he licked his lips. 

A pounding at the door made the back of your head jump slightly, “Jake cmon man hurry up! You’re taking longer than fuckin Josh does.” Sam’s voice rang out through the solid oak. 

You let out a breath and Jake smirked, “Sammy boy seems to have impeccable timing.” He said softly. 

“Seems so.” You returned his soft smile and hoped  he would kiss you even after your interrupted moment. Your heart sank in disappointment as Jake stepped away from you and made his way across the room to his case where you had tucked away his change of clothes earlier.

“Can you run ahead and tell Sammy I’ll be there in a moment, Clover? I’m sure he’s about ready to grab Daniel to break the door down.” You watched as his thumb tucked away underneath the rolled up band of his towel, mouth going dry at the brief thought of what was hidden away by a thin piece of fabric. What probably was softly tucked up against your hip a moment ago. 

“Uh..yeah, yes I’ll do that right away.” You squeaked from your dry throat.

“Thanks Y/N.” 

With a wink and a soft head nod in your direction, he dipped into the bathroom once again to change. You trailed out of his greenroom desperate for some fresh air. Maybe a damn cigarette at this point. Simply anything to calm your wild heart.

***

While you had been opposed to drinking on the job, you had found Sam and Josh to be very convincing. The second you step foot into the green room down the hall you are instantly surrounded by loud music and booming voices. 

“Que sera, sera! Whatever will be, will be..” 

Josh had his arms wrapped tight around one of the security guards and another arm around Sam. All three of them belting the chorus to the song, legs kicking in the air in unison. Laughter followed shortly after. You couldn’t help but feel a rush of emotions. You were so grateful to have started working with Greta Van Fleet. You felt your shoulders drop and all your worries seemed to melt as you took in the scene in front of you. Smiles all around, laughter filling the air. 

“Ahh! Y/N!,” Josh boomed, waving his finger in your direction. “So glad you could sneak away from my twin to join us. Come, come! Pick your poison darling!”

Josh pranced across the room towards you, still rocking one of his famous jumpsuits and rhinestones. He looped his arm with yours and dragged you over to a small table littered with ice buckets, beers, cups, liquors and mixers alike. 

“We have it all! What would you like?” 

“Hmm, surprise me!” You smiled. 

“You don’t want that,” Jake's voice rang out beside you, making your body flush with heat. “He’ll make you a damn salty dog.” 

“What's that?” You turned to look at Josh.

“Grapefruit juice, salted rim and vodka.” Jake’s nose scrunched as he grabbed a red solo cup and some ice. His hair was now towel dried and he was clad in his usual button down and favorite pants of the month. 

“Ohh it’s not that bad!” Josh said, shooting daggers at Jake. “It’s the best screwdriver you’ll ever have Y/N!” 

“I do like a good screwdriver.” You said, matter of factly, tapping your finger on your chin for dramatics. 

Jake snorted as he poured some four roses whiskey into his cup, “Suit yourself Clover, but don’t say I didn’t warn ya.” He popped the cork back into the bottle and gave you a wink. 

Josh had already begun twisting the rim of a cup in a pile of salt not too far from you, humming softly to an old bluesy song that was playing that you couldn’t quite place. 

“Here you go miss Y/N!” Josh shoved the red cup in your direction a few minutes later.

You took it cautiously and glanced between Jake and Josh, Jake who was already trying to hide his smirk and Josh who looked ever so hopeful. 

“Damn I didn’t know this would acquire such an audience.” You said sarcastically. 

“Hush up and just drink!” Josh said. 

You brought the cup up to your nose and smelled it. You were immediately hit with the pungent scent of vodka and the sourness of grapefruit. You lifted your eyebrow as you took a sip and immediately puckered. “Oh god.” 

Jake let out a booming laugh and Josh looked wounded.

“That's,” you took another sip. “No.” You handed the drink off to Josh who was clasping a hand over his heart. 

“Told you so.” Jake snorted, stirring his drink with a black straw. 

“Y/N, I am hurt.” Josh said dramatically. 

“I’m sorry love but that’s just not my cup of tea.” You scrunched up your nose as you watched Josh take a big gulp. 

“Suit yourself Clover!” Josh said, pointing a finger. 

You immediately caught Jake’s glare towards his twin at the use of his nickname for you. “Watch it Josh.” 

Josh just shrugged and winked at Jake, suddenly getting distracted from the sound of boisterous yelling across the room. 

You busied yourself making a concoction of your favorite drink from your options in front of you. Once you were happy with your mix, you stood next to Jake and watched the antics across the room unfold which consisted of a few golf balls and a red solo cup. 

“So,” you smirked at Jake over the lip of your cup. “When exactly were you going to tell me about this new band?” 

“Ahh,” he smirked and gave you a side eye. “Was trying to keep it under wraps as much as possible but I see someone let their tongue slip.” He took another generous sip of his drink.

You snorted, “Kinda hard to do that when you boys all have megaphones for mouths.” 

“Hey!” He bumped you with his elbow. “That's awfully rude Clover.” 

“Alright!” Danny clapped his hands together before you could respond. “Everyone grab a shot of tequila! Tonight calls for a major celebration for our dearest friend Jake and his new band!” 

“I see I’ve found the culprit.” Jake shook his head but he didn’t seem displeased, he seemed shy. Which was shocking to you as he always seemed so confident in himself.

You hadn’t noticed but Rose had pre poured little tequila shooters in plastic cups and had a small cup of lime wedges sitting next to it. Once everyone had their respective shots, Danny raised his in the air and everyone followed suit. 

“To our brother Jake! We are so proud of you for this new project coming to fruition. May this be a successful one for you!” Danny smiled wide. “To Mirador!” 

“To Mirador!” Everyone followed suit. 

September 7th.

Detroit, MI.

You awoke suddenly and you were met with the wall of the tour bus bunk a few inches in front of your face, the consistent pinging of your phone next to your head. Even though you could hear the air conditioning buzzing on the bus you were hot and uncomfortable. The sweat making your hair stick to the side of your neck and face. You were definitely hungover. You couldn’t believe you allowed yourself to indulge so much. You groaned as your phone pinged next to your head again. You rolled over, feeling instantly dizzy and squinted your eyes as your screen lit up the dark space.

You allowed yourself to let loose last night, that was for certain. It wasn’t too difficult after the first shot of tequila had hit your stomach and settled, you felt yourself actually relax for once. You weren’t doing your job last night, you were simply hanging out with some new friends and celebrating. By the time you had your 3rd shot of tequila and you were on your second mixed drink of the night you had been dancing with Josh to one of his favorite ABBA songs blaring on a little speaker across the room from where you were twirling away together. The more you drank, the more your eyes focused on Jake from across the room. Watching him smile and indulge in a rather obnoxious game of quarters with a few members from security and Danny. The more you drank the more insatiable you became for him. 

You wanted to have him pressed up against you again. You began to wonder as Josh abandoned you for a drink refill and you were standing alone now against the wall, what would’ve happened if Sammy had not interrupted you earlier that evening. You wondered if Jake wanted you the same way you wanted him. In a way so bad you felt as if you would not be satisfied until you had him fully. The tequila was bringing out such a lustful and sinful side of you that you were not used to. As Jake caught your eye and winked at you from across the room with a smile tugging on his lips, you felt your body react in a way you hadn’t felt in such a long time for anyone else. In a way that you will definitely keep chasing, no matter what the consequences may be you decide. Josh came back along and bumped your shoulder, breaking your eye contact with Jake who just realized he had lost because he hadn’t been paying attention. Josh had a small shot of tequila and a lime in his outstretched hand to which you accepted with a wince. That ended up being shot number 4 for the night, and one of the last things you could remember. 

As you lay in the bunk and rubbed the sleep from your eyes, you realized you weren’t even sure how or when you had made it back on the tour bus in the first place. You groaned softly in agony as you felt your heart rate increase slightly at the fear of what had occurred after that final shot. 

You finally acknowledged the messages on your phone in front of you, realizing you had been scrolling and reading, yet not comprehending the messages themselves. The group chat you had reluctantly been added to with the 4 gentlemen, Rose, and a few others had been the cause of your disturbance. Messages had been going back and forth about plans for a group brunch somewhere in downtown Detroit. You winced at the pain shooting through your skull. Why was everyone already wide awake and ready to go? Didn’t they drink as much as you? You were surprised as you focused on the time finally, seeing it was almost 10 am. This meant you at least got some decent sleep for once on the bus and you wished you didn’t have to drink to achieve such results. 

Scrolling through the remainder of the messages on your Lock Screen, forgoing any responses in the group chat, you noticed you had one single text from Jake separate from the rest.

Jake K. 9:23 AM

Carpe diem Clover, I want you to come to brunch

You see underneath that text he had called you moments before the message was sent. The bus was pretty silent for this hour and you wondered where he and the rest of the group was. You smiled softly at your phone and typed on the little bar to pull up your keyboard to respond. 

You 10:02 AM

What time is brunch? I have a wicked hangover and could use a shower…

You saw the little text bubble pop up almost immediately as Jake clearly jumped to respond to you. 

Jake K. 10:02 AM 

SHE LIVES! I’m not surprised you were pretty drunk yesterday

Brunch is at 11. Hurry up and get off the bus, there’s some people I want you to meet today. 

You 10:03 AM 

Oh no..did I do anything embarrassing? 

Jake K. 10:04 AM 

You tried to kiss me a few times when I was trying to get you into your bunk and you wouldn’t let me leave you for a little bit

You winced, of course..smooth Y/N

You 10:06 AM 

Oh my god I’m so sorry…

Jake K. 10:06 AM 

Don’t sweat it Clover, it was cute. 😉

Hurry up and get off the bus already! 

You 10:07 AM 

Yes sir 🫡 

You pulled the curtain back on your bunk and winced at the daylight, the smell of diesel suffocating your nose. You really needed some fresh air as the nausea settled in your stomach. You hopped down from your bunk, having to steady yourself across the hallway and then pulling your favorite hoodie on. 

Your phone lay on the bunk mattress and you heard it chime and blushed wildly at Jake’s response. 

Jake K. 10:13 AM 

Careful Clover..

***

It didn’t take you too long to get ready. A nice cold shower and a few Tylenol and you had begun to feel somewhat like a human being again. You threw on your favorite comfy clothing, figuring for once you didn’t care too much about your appearance, and made your way down the elevator to the lobby. You were excited for breakfast, hoping that the boys had picked a good spot, a cheap place at least. You loved the mom and pop diners in your hometown and you had missed visiting them dearly. 

The elevator chimed and you walked out into the lobby, hearing your name called by Jake from across the way almost instantly. He was standing with a group of people waving you over with a beaming smile, his sunglasses resting against his nose. Some of these people you recognized, some you did not. 

“Y/N, this is my mother.” He gestured to the left of him with a smile as you approached. “Mom, this is my Y/N.” 

“Nice to meet you Mrs. Kiszka.” You extended your hand to shake hers with a soft smile.

“Oh nonsense come here,” She wrapped you up in a loving embrace. “It's so nice to finally meet you, I have heard so much about you.” She pulls away from the hug, still gripping your shoulders softly and glances over at Jake with a smile. 

“Mom!” Jake exasperated through gritted teeth. You blushed and gave Jake a teasing look seeing that his cheeks were the same red hue. 

Mrs.Kiszka ignored him and still held heavy eye contact with you, “Will you be joining us Y/N?” 

You tore your eyes away from Jake who was nervously combing his fingers through his hair and looked back at his mother, “I am yes.” You gave her a soft smile. 

“Oh wonderful!,” she clapped. “Do we have everyone? Should we head out?” 

She stepped away from you briefly and you smirked at Jake next to you who was sporting the sweetest pink hue across his cheeks. 

***

Your fingertips traced the edge of the white cloth napkin as it sat on your lap, an anxious tick for you in uncomfortable situations. This place was expensive. You took one look at the menu and you felt the air escape your lungs. How they were about to charge people $21 for a single piece of toast, a quarter of an avocado and some olive oil drizzled was beyond you. It wasn't that your job didn’t pay you well but you felt like since you started living on your own you were more cautious than others when it came to spending money. 

So what the hell were you going to eat?  

Loud, joyous laughs rang next to you coming from the people sitting at your table, as well as Josh’s booming voice clearly telling an animated story. His story died down a moment or two later and the fingertips that were tracing the edge of the linen cloth were now nervously picking at the ends of your hair as your eyes frantically scanned the menu in front of you searching for the cheapest item as you heard voices around you say they were ready to order. 

“What are you thinking Clover?” Jake said softly. You glanced up and saw him giving you a hopeful look, flipping his menu over to hand to his mother next to him. 

“Oh uh,” your eyes quickly scanned the Sides section. “Probably just a fruit cup.” 

“A fruit cup? That’s all?” Jake’s eyebrows raised as he rested his chin on his hands in front of you. “You feeling okay?” One of his hands reached across the table and rested softly on your forehead, checking your temperature. 

“Yeah i-uhm…everything’s kind of, it’s just expensive.” You felt the shame settle in the bottom of your stomach. You tried to speak softly so as to not draw unnecessary attention to yourself. 

Jake looked puzzled for a moment and before he could open his mouth, Mrs.Kiszka reached across the table and patted the spot in front of you. “Honey, we’re all like family around here, don’t worry about anything we will take care of it. Enjoy a nice breakfast.” 

Family. 

Family was a touchy subject for you. Your mother hasn’t been around since you were 6, abandoning you and your father for a “better life” with another man. While you had repaired most of your relationship with your father that had been destroyed by your teenage rebellion of not having a strong woman figure in your life, you two didn’t end on the best terms before you moved to Nashville to pursue your dreams. Your father wanted you to pursue “something great”, something similar to what he did. Something that he felt he could brag about to his friends like a doctor or even an engineer. You had seen the disappointment in his eyes when you told him you wanted to be a part of the music scene and not get a PhD. 

Mrs. Kiszkas hand withdrew as the waiter came up to the opposite end of the table and started scribbling orders down, going around making eye contact with each person and chatting, sharing smiles or small laughs. The world felt like it was moving in slow motion as you realized the waiter was about to ask the security guard sitting next to you what he wanted to eat. You felt out of place. You felt wrong. You shouldn’t be here… 

As the tears began to well in your eyes you stood promptly from the table, grabbing your small purse off of the back of the chair. You needed a moment. 

“Clover?” Jake's concerned voice was but a distant sound behind you as you made eye contact with the restroom sign across the restaurant. The shortness of breath followed suit and the tightening of your throat snapped as you pushed the heavy door open and locked it behind you, slightly thankful this was a single person bathroom. 

You let your tears fall for a brief moment. You were never good at expressing your emotions around others, always wearing a smile and pretending everything was okay even when your world could have been crumbling. You were always told growing up how awesome it was that you were so resilient in tough situations. Yet really you just masked your emotions and dealt with them in the safety of your room where no one could see what was going on. That's why you ran from that table, suddenly overwhelmed and jealous that the boys had such a loving and supportive family. Such a loving and clearly supportive mother. Something you’ve wanted since the day you turned 16… 

You heard a soft knock sound against the door, “Clover?” 

Fuck. 

You started to run the water and splashed a little bit against your cheeks, trying to wipe away the heat that had settled into your skin and the tears that had been streaking down your soft skin. You turned it off abruptly and made it a point to run the hand dryer before taking a deep breath, then another and then another. As always, it was easy to push the strong sadness that you felt in your heart down, faking a smile in the mirror before turning back to the solid oak wood door. 

There he was. Standing against the wall scrolling on his phone, one leg propped against the wall keeping him steady. His eyes snapped up as he heard the door creak open and you could see the sadness as it settled into his eyes. You hated that. You hated seeing other people’s pity for you. You didn’t need it, you didn’t want it. You had spent your whole childhood and teenage years practically alone and you learned quickly to not accept love or care so willingly because they will probably leave you when things get hard. 

You stood still as a statue for a moment as you fought against that tightening in your throat once again. Jake locked his phone and pushed off the wall towards you, “Y/N, what’s wrong?” He brushed a piece of hair away from your face, his fingers not gliding as easily as they normally did due to the dampness of your cheeks.

“Uhm,” you looked down. “Nothing, I’m fine I just really had to use the bathroom?” 

Great, that didn't sound convincing and gross?

“Clover,” Jake sounded sad. “We both know that’s not true.” 

“Jake I really-“ 

Your sentence was cut off by the loud ring of your phone in your right hand. You glanced at the screen to see one of the sound techs name calling you. You held it up to Jake so he could see and held up your finger. He nodded and stepped out of your way so you could walk by him. 

“Hello?” You pressed a finger into your opposite ear and began to walk down the hallway towards the exit door, the restaurant too loud to focus on talking to someone on the phone. 

“Miss Y/N? I’m sorry to bug you but we’re missing a few of Jake’s guitars. Do you have any clue where they are?” 

“You’re missing guitars?! How the hell did that happen!” You looked back at Jake and saw a fire ignite in his eyes. 

“I have no idea, we’re missing the B stage acoustics!” 

“Not to sound condescending but did you check all the crates?” 

Jake made a motion at you to put the phone on speaker, nostrils slightly flared. 

“Yes ma'am, of course.” The tech’s voice sounded through your phone speakers out loud.

“We will be down there in a few minutes.” Jake spoke for you, his voice pointed. 

“Oh, okay, yes see you soon,” the tech was clearly nervous as he realized it was Jake. “I’m really sorry Jake I-.” 

Jake had already been storming away from you back down the hallways towards the table. 

“It’s okay, we will get this figured out,” you said softly trying to calm the tech down. “We will be there in about 20 to help.” 

You ended the call promptly and began walking back towards the table following the same path Jake had taken. 

Jake, who you had never seen properly pissed before, was gripping the back of the chair so tightly it looked like the skin was going to rip against his knuckles. “I don’t fuckin know Josh, she just got the call, we’re about to leave.” 

“Hey, excuse me,” Mrs. Kiszka spoke up. “Don’t go taking it out on him, it's not his fault.” 

Jake just rolled his eyes before looking back at you and suddenly everyone’s eyes were focused on you, an uncomfortable silence hung in the air after Jake’s apparent outburst. 

You smiled softly trying to diffuse the tension, “Sorry everyone, we’re about to head to the venue now to figure out what’s going on and find these guitars.” 

“No worries honey, I hope you can find them.” Mrs.Kiszkas soft voice and smile was all you could focus on. 

“Cmon Clover, before I have a fuckin aneurysm” Jake’s hand pressed against your lower back and began to lead you away from the table. The only thing you could focus on was his strong fingertips against your hip as you exited the building. 

*** 

The crisis has been resolved fairly quickly. After some diligent searching by yourself, Jake and a few other techs you had found th3 acoustics. One of the newer techs had placed Jake’s beloved acoustics on one of the team's tour buses instead of in their normal crates. You had taken a seat on a couch in one of the green rooms, typing away at a few emails listening to Jake rip the tech a new one in the hallway nearby. You were momentarily wincing softly at the tone of his strong voice feeling pity for the tech who was on the receiving end of his rage. You hated conflict. It made your anxiety rise and you tended to avoid situations of conflict at all costs, hence you tucking yourself away once Jake found the tech responsible for the negligence of his beloved guitars. 

The harsh voice faded away and you watched out of the corner of your eye as Jake carried two black guitar cases into the greenroom shaking his head softly. “Sorry you had to hear that Clover” 

“No no,” you waved him off. “I understand. I know how much those guitars mean to you.” 

You watched as Jake unlatched one of the cases and picked it up before focusing back on your computer screen as the chime came through that one of your emails had been replied to. 

“So Clover,” Jake began to walk across the room towards you, settling a single leg on the coffee table in front you and propping the guitar against his thigh. “Are you going to tell me why you ran away from breakfast earlier?” 

You winced slightly. You hated, abhorred talking about your feelings to others. You hated bringing up your family trauma. Others before Jake had ruined that for you. Eventually using the information against you, to hurt you in times of tension, or hearing one sad story about your childhood and deciding that the baggage wasn’t for them. Your fingers stopped typing for a moment, “it’s nothing you need to worry about I promise.” 

Jake’s fingers now stopped the soft tuning of his acoustic as he looked at you, “Cmon Clover, I know that’s not true.” 

Your mouth opened to speak but you were interrupted by a soft knock against the door frame. “Hey!” The boys' manager Nick stood in the doorway. “I see the guitars were found?” 

“Yes they were.” Jake rubbed the side of his nose and removed his leg from the coffee table. 

“Sorry about that Jake, didn’t mean to disrupt your breakfast this morning.” 

Jake waved him off and placed the acoustic back in its case. 

“I was actually wondering if I could speak to you for a moment? It's regarding Mirador.” Paul said, crossing his arms and flashing a bright smile. 

“Yeah, for sure man!” Jake’s eyes lightened up. “I’ll be right back Y/N. Don’t let those guitars out of your sight.” 

You saluted the man as he walked across the room towards Paul and giggled softly to yourself. You focused back on the computer screen in front of you, sipping a drink that the venue had graciously provided even though you were here a day early before the show. 

You took a brief moment to stretch your arms and your neck and your eyes focused on the black acoustic sitting so perfectly in the opened guitar case. You fought against a little voice in your head encouraging you to pick it up. It had been so long since you held a guitar, let alone tried to play it. But there was an itch in your muscles. Acoustic guitars felt like home to you. And fuck did you miss home right now. 

You gave into the little voice in your head, hoping that whatever impromptu meeting Paul had pulled Jake for would last a little while as you told yourself you were just going to tune it and then place it back in its case like nothing happened. Your body had carried you so easily across the room and you looked down at the shiny black surface and smiled to yourself. You were flooded with warm, happy memories from your childhood, throwing a blanket over the tough ones that riddled your mind from earlier. You were transported back to your childhood room, your zoo animal wallpaper and your father, sitting on a small stool teaching you about tuning a guitar before playing the most beautiful melodies to ease your troubled mind to sleep. 

Your throat tightened once again as you lifted the guitar from its case and walked back across the room, settling yourself on the black couch. You took a deep breath, willing the anxiety and frustration away from earlier as you strummed all the strings softly. 

Slightly out of tune, but not terrible. 

You closed your eyes and softly began to strum each individual string, fingers dancing across each separate knob twisting and turning until you hit that perfect note you had been looking for. You smiled softly to yourself as you found each string had finally been to your liking. 

“What’s this all about, huh?” Jake startled you, a sneaky grin about his blush lips as he re entered the room. His eyes are narrowed in on his acoustic held carefully in your hands. 

“Jake! I-Im so sorry!” You panicked for a moment and your eyes grew wide. You half expected him to take it from you immediately and ridicule you for even laying a finger on his guitar, knowing good and well that you’re no musician. Yet, instead of reaching for the guitar tucked away in your arms, he sat on the coffee table in front of you and when you had begun to stand up from your spot, he held a hand up and shook his head. 

“May I?” He smirked as he slowly reached for the neck from your fingers, playing a few chords once it was settled in his arms. His brows raise when he realizes how perfectly in tune his strings are. 

He hummed as he looked at you, a sly grin still gracing his lips. “Clover,” he jests with a giggle, a full pink hue enveloping your cheeks at the nickname that you’re not sure you’ll ever get used to. “When were you going to tell me you could play?”

“Well,” you begin, trying to figure out the right way to articulate the fact that you most certainly cannot play this instrument. How do you explain that you can only tune these things, yet can’t play a single note? “I can’t exactly play it, but I am pretty damn great at making them sound good enough to play.” 

He cocks left eyebrow in confusion at you, biting his bottom lip as his grin begins to widen. “Yeah? And how does one manage to learn that trade?” He began strumming the strings softly again.

That is a loaded question, you thought. One that comes with an even more loaded answer pertaining to your challenging emotions not too long ago at breakfast. You took a deep breath and exhaled through your nose as your heart squeezed in your chest at the thoughts that plagued your mind earlier came flooding back. 

“You know you can talk to me Y/N. No judgment.” The twinkle in his golden irises began giving you a sense of peace and comfort. Your heart was reluctant to share information but your brain seemed to insist. 

“It’s…kind of a long one and it kind of has to do with what happened earlier,” you express, looking down at your feet. 

He adjusts his seat, setting the guitar down next to him that he’d been softly playing. “I’ve got plenty of time,” he says, rolling up the sleeve of his black linen shirt to look at his watch. “Tell me all about it, Clove.” 

With a deep sigh and not much of a spare thought, your loaded answer began to spill from your mouth. “My dad,” you say, swallowing down the lump that’s already started to form in your throat. No tears, Y/N. Not yet. “He taught me how to tune his guitar when I was little. He’s—well, he’s the reason I’m here, actually.” 

His eyes became downturned in new found worry, as though he could sense the bittersweet memories that had begun to swirl in your mind. Memories of your life before Nashville, memories of your mom, your dad…

It’s been no easy feat getting to where you are today. The mountains you've had to climb, the people you’ve left behind— all for the sake of living out your dream of being part of the music industry.

And now that it’s become a reality, now that you’re living in the Music City, home feels further and further away with each passing moment. 

Your mom left a long time ago, opting to let your dad become your only guardian. And because of that, your relationship with your dad was the strongest one you’d ever had. And what you told Jake was true; he truly is the reason you’re here. 

He supported you when no one else would. He encouraged your wildest dreams, gave you room to grow and spread your wings as best as he could with his single income. 

Leaving him was one of the hardest things you’d ever done. As if leaving the person who loved you the most wasn’t difficult enough, you didn’t exactly leave on the best terms. He did support you, but once it registered with him that living out your dreams meant moving across the country, he had a hard time letting you go. 

You left with a thousand words left unsaid between the two of you, yet too many said out of anger at the same time. You’ve hardly spoken to him since, fearful of what emotions reaching out to him would garner. A few texts here and there, a missed call or two from him that you just couldn’t answer. 

You missed him. You missed him more than words could ever suffice. And going back home to visit just hasn’t been possible since you left. Finances, time– neither of which you have enough of. 

You’d managed to keep busy enough that you hadn’t had the chance to let yourself feel the things you’d really needed to feel. 

“It’s complicated, but he-“ You paused as the tears welled up in your eyes again. “He used to play for me every night before bed. My mom hasn’t been in the picture since I was little and this was his way of calming me down, helping soothe my night terrors..” You took a deep breath before you continued.

“He was always busy, trying to maintain a single father's single income household so he taught me how to tune the guitars by ear that sat in my room so that when it was time for him to play music before I went to sleep, he didn’t have to take the extra time to tune them..”

“When I told him I wanted to get into music though, that I wanted to learn how to play he got mad at me. He stopped playing for me, he took the guitars and hid them from me,” you sniffled but then giggled as the pain rose in your chest, fidgeting with your fingers in your lap. “I will never forget the day I found one of the guitar cases in the basement and he grounded my ass for weeks and then removed them from the house completely.” 

“Oh Clover..” Jake began to speak but you cut him off. 

“You should’ve seen his face when I told him this is what I was doing and he couldn’t stop me. That I was going to move to Nashville and pursue a degree in music. He practically disowned me. Kicked me out of the fucking house he was so upset with me.” 

Tears were now flowing freely down your cheeks and you watched as Jake lifted a few fingers to swipe them away. 

“I went back a week later with my best friend at the time and packed up my shit into my little car and made for Nashville the same day. A lot of harsh words were exchanged between us, many I know we both regret. I went to Nash without a plan and made something of myself but never fully patched things up with my father. And unfortunately,” you paused a moment and sighed as Jake swiped another free falling tear off of your cheek. “I have not been able to get the funds to go home and see him yet. We talk every once in a while, yes but he sucks with technology. Literally repels it!” You giggle. “But fuck I miss him. I wish he could see all this..” 

“Jesus Clover, I’m so sorry..” Jake stood up in front of you and practically picked you up into a hug, his hand cradling the back of your head as your arms wrapped tightly around him. 

You breathed in Jake’s cologne, feeling safe in his arms, “It’s alright I guess. I accomplished my dream and he and I have talked over the last couple of years and while I know he’s not pleased with me being in the music industry, he has expressed that he is proud of what I have made for myself back in Nashville. It just sucks because I haven’t been able to go home and see him.” 

Jake pulled away and rested his hands against your cheeks, “Were going to change that Clover. Once this tour is over, once we have our next break, we’ll get the first flight possible and I will take you home. I promise.” 

Tears began spilling down your cheeks, only this time instead of pain you felt happiness.

“Jake, are-are you sure?” 

“Course I’m sure Clove. Anything to see you smile!” 

You squealed in delight and wrapped your arms around Jake again as he laughed softly. Your impulse was running wild as you pulled back from the hug and wrapped your hand around the back of his head. His eyes grew wide for a moment before he felt your lips crash against his. His fingers tightened on your waist and your lips that had once been pressed roughly against his, adjusted slightly to make the kiss more soft, more grateful. 

You pulled back a moment later, reminded of where you both were. “Shit, I’m sorry!” You giggled as you looked up at him. 

He smiled back down at you and leaned forward, giving you a soft pack before pulling away again, “No apologies necessary Clover.” 

“Hey, you ever listened to any of our music other than what you hear on stage?” He asks as you two separate from each other. He leaned down, picking up the guitar that he had laid next to him and sat back down on the coffee table. You watched as you mirrored his potion again on the couch as he balanced it on his lap. He began to softly retune a few of the strings to match the chord he was looking for. 

“I’ll be honest, I haven’t had the chance.” 

He hums softly as he plucks two of the strings and closes his eyes smiling at the tone he had achieved. “Clover is like to tell you about a song called Broken Bells. It reminds me of hope in the darkest of times and I think this would be a great song for you, as a reminder to remain hopeful even when you feel like there’s no hope left.” 

You watch as he pulls a pick from his jeans pocket and balances it between his teeth. You watch in wonder as his fingers begin to slowly dance across the frets in front of you, the most beautiful melody ringing through the air. You envied him slightly that he could make such a beautiful sound from an instrument. Your heart leapt in your throat as Jake pulled the little black pick from between his lips and took a soft breath and began to sing softly, 

“I can see the faces through the broken glass..” 

September 10th. 

Washington D.C.

You would think that a day off meant relaxing, catching up on sleep for the young musicians. Majority of the time you were lucky enough that was the case and your phone was pretty silent for most of the day and you had the opportunity to catch up on missed sleep or that book you've been reading. You had arrived at the hotel around midday in D.C. fully prepared for a warm shower and a comfortable bed as it had been another sleepless night for you on the bus.

You sighed as the bus came to a halt and you swung your backpack over your left shoulder. Thankfully you had been able to sneak off the bus before any of the guys took notice. They had been arguing over who knows what in the open space above you in the upper deck of the bus. You had immediately avoided the space as you felt a migraine coming on from your lack of slumber. 

You were on auto pilot mode as you strolled through the hotel lobby and quickly checked into your room, thankful that Rose had booked you a room of your own for once and also grateful that she had let you sneak ahead of everyone else knowing how exhausted you were. As you stepped under the hot water in the white walled shower, you took your time combing the conditioner through your hair, exfoliating and shaving every inch of your body. Your body moved in slow motion when you stepped out and wrapped yourself in a white fluffy towel. You silently pouted to yourself as you grabbed your bottle of lotion, wanting nothing more than to go lay down but refusing to half ass your shower routine when you felt like you rarely had the time to complete it. 

The very moment your head hit the white pillow you felt your body relax fully and succumb to sleep. 

***

You didn't know what time it was or where you even were for a moment. All you knew is it was dark and you were very cold. You groaned softly as you rolled over and grabbed your phone off of the nightstand next to the bed.

Jake K.  12:23 AM

Hey, you alive over there Clover? 

You turned over in bed again, sitting up a bit. You were happy you got some much needed rest but you were now wide awake of course, and hungry. You pulled up the keyboard on your phone to respond to Jake.

You 1:34 AM

Possibly. 

Jake K. 1:35 AM

Well that's good to hear. Get some much needed rest I presume?

Oh, he's still awake..

You 1:37 AM

Oh no I've just been sitting in my room staring at the wall for the last 12 hours or so

Jake K. 1:37 AM

Watch the attitude Clover…

You 1:40 AM 

Or what..

Why are you awake anyways?

Jake K. 1:46 AM

Inspiration struck me as I was out on the town an hour or so ago

You 1:50 AM 

Anything good?

You laid back in bed, smiling softly at your phone awaiting that little text bubble to pop up on your screen.

A soft knock sounded at your door a few minutes later, so faint that you almost thought your brain could be playing tricks on you. You crept over to the door and looked through the peephole, seeing Jake’s face scanning the hallway behind him. Your heart sped up in anticipation. What the fuck was he doing here. 

You cracked open the door, and peaked around the side of it. “Jake?” You whispered. 

“Hey Clover,” he whispered back, smirk tugging at the side of his mouth. “Can I come in?” 

Your heart said yes but your head screamed no. Yet the devil on your shoulder won the almost nonexistent battle as you stepped to the side and gleefully watched him waltz into your hotel room at  2 am. This was not going to end well, this went against everything you’ve been avoiding for the last couple of weeks. 

Jake stopped by the door and smirked at you as you slowly closed it shut and latched the deadbolt, clearly reading the conflict written all over your face. 

“What’sa matter Clove?” 

Oh he was slurring a bit. Your eyes snapped to his face and you could clearly see the droopy, red shot eyes and the smirk he couldn’t wipe off his face. Of course he smoked.

You crossed your arms against your chest, your own protection mechanism. “Just wondering what you’re doing here so late is all.” 

“I wanted to see you.” He whispered as he tucked a few pieces of hair behind your ear. You felt like butter on a hot summer's day left out in the sun, you were absolutely done for. 

“Oh,” you squeaked out. “Why?” 

“Does there really need to be a reason why?” His eyebrows furrowed. 

“There’s always a why..” 

“Let’s not worry about that right now, yeah?” He asked, grabbing your hand softly and leading you further into your own room. Your sanctuary that he was currently disturbing. “I just wanted to see you, talk to you in person instead of texting. Plain and simple.” 

He sat down on the plush couch that the luxury hotel offered in each room, gesturing you to do the same. Your arms had recrossed as you watched him get comfortable. 

Kick him out Y/N…

“You uh, would you like something to drink?” 

Okay, that’s not… 

He smiled up at you, teeth showing ever so slightly between his soft pink lips. “I’d love to have something, yeah. Whatcha got?” 

“Not too sure, I didn't really check out the room earlier.” You walked over to the mini fridge tucked away in the corner, very aware that his gaze had not left your body since the moment he stepped into the room. You leaned down and opened the door, “Well, I don’t have anything exciting really. Just water, sparkling water, and it looks like ginger ale.” 

“Sparkling water if you don’t mind.” 

You grabbed a bottle for him and regular water for yourself and walked back across the room. You handed him the bottle which he took and popped the cap on immediately and took a long sip, eyes never leaving your face as you made the move to sit down opposite him. “Hmm-mm!” He shook his head and his eyebrows furrowed as he pulled the bottle away from his lips. “No, c’mere.” 

He patted his right thigh. 

“Huh?” He caught you off guard. 

“Sit on my lap Y/N,” His legs spread ever so slightly. “I wanna be close to you.” 

Damn him and your heart for following his orders so easily. 

“Jake I-,” There goes the so-called angel on your shoulder. 

He lifted his eyebrows at you. “What Y/N?” 

“You-you’re intoxicated aren’t you?” You still stood in front of him, arms crossed against your chest. 

He took another swig of the water, you watched closely as his pink lips made contact with the bottle and his throat bobbed as he swallowed. “Just a little high is all Clover. I’m perfectly aware of what is going on if that’s what you’re so concerned about.” He smirked at you, itching the side of his nose and then spread himself out a little further on the couch. His arm resting on the pillows next to him and opening his legs in your direction, that smirk growing as he watched your eyes trail down to his crotch. Your cheeks went aflame as you realized you were caught once again. 

He was so devastatingly good looking. You could feel your body pulling yourself closer to him. Needing to be closer to him. There was that devil on your shoulder…

Before you fully comprehended what was happening, your legs approached Jake for you. He smirked up at you as his arms welcomed you. You sat as softly as you could on top of his thigh that was pressing up against the arm of the couch. His hand and arm snaked under both of your legs, propping you up against him on the couch. 

“Hmm, much, much better.” A soft British accent poured from his mouth, soft and saccharine. 

Your arm snaked around his shoulders to help balance yourself as he had one arm across your back and, to your demise, one hand propped up against your knee already softly grazing the skin there. 

“Talk to me little Clover,” his mouth was so close to your skin. “How was your day today?” 

There go his fingers, you thought as they lightly started grazing the inside of your knee. 

“Oh, uhm..it was good, you know I caught up on a lot of sleep, so.” 

“Yeah I know, but do you feel like you’re settling in well?” 

Lower, and softer his fingers went across your inner thigh now. His other hand pulling up your sleep shirt to reach the skin, oh…

“Yeah!” You squeaked. “Everyone is so, uhm, nice.” 

“Hmm,” his eyes lingered down from your face to your cleavage. 

You couldn’t help yourself anymore, you felt like you were going to explode. “Jake.” You practically moaned out as his fingers dipped along the hem of your sleep shorts again. When exactly he had moved that low again, you hadn’t a clue. 

“Yes Y/N?” 

Fuck it. 

“Kiss me.”

“I thought you'd never ask.” He smirked. 

His arm that was holding onto your waist snaked up to the back of your neck and pulled your head closer to his as he smashed his lips against yours. You moaned against his lips ever so softly. You missed the feeling of how soft and prominent his bottom lip was compared to the top, you missed the feeling of his teeth chasing your lips giving you soft nibbles and God fuck did you miss the drag of his warm tongue against your own. 

His hand that was grazing your inner thigh moved up and grabbed across your ribcage to your dismay, but the slight tinge of pain as he grabbed at you with his hands was welcomed. Your hand snaked up across his neck and grabbed into his hair, how badly you wanted to do this he really hadn’t a clue. 

Neither of you made the move to come up for air as the kiss between the two of you became wet and sloppy, the sounds of lips smacking against each other filling the hotel room. You felt Jake smirk against your lips before he slowly began to slow down the kiss to pecks between you to then pulling away. 

“Clover, you have no idea what the fuck you do to me.” His voice came out husky and soft, his eyelids still half open and the softest grin on his now almost red, wet lips. 

“Show me.” You said, confidently. All inhibitions out the window. 

“Oh Y/N,” he whispered as he tilted your head slightly away from him. He placed the softest kiss against that sweet spot where your ear met your jaw. You gasped as he began trailing down the side of your throat. “Jake,” you started, almost breathless as his lips trailed up along your neck and then back up to that sweet spot below your ear. 

“Shhh..” 

“Is this a good idea?” Your mind suddenly panics. 

He pulled back, the expression in his eyes unreadable. “Nothing involving me is ever a good idea Clover.” 

You watched as he licked both of his lips trying to read you, his fingertips tracing a light circle along the inside of your thigh that was propped up against him. “We can stop.” 

The logic in your head screamed yes, but your weeping core protested. You both stared at each other for a moment, you could tell he was trying to get a read on you. You focused on the furrow in his forehead, the curve of his nose, the soft trail of hair regrowing on his upper lip and then the shape of those soft lips you wish would never part from yours. Fuck it, you thought again.  

“Jake I-.” 

“Yes Clover?” 

“I want you.” Your eyes snapped to his finally, holding his gaze. 

“Are you sure?” 

You nodded your head softly and bit your lip. His finger quickly moved to pull your bottom lip from its hold between your teeth. “I need to hear you say it again. Tell me exactly what you want.” 

“I want you Jake,” you paused, feeling shy. “I want you to fuck me.”  

Jake smirked and gripped onto your hips, moving you so you were now strangling his lap and looking down at him. Your eyes grew wide as you realized he was already rock hard, pressing against your core. 

He kissed you softly. One peck turned into two which then turned into your original pace of clashing teeth and smacking lips. 

You felt his fingertips begin to drag up underneath your sleep shirt, grazing your ribs softly as you moaned into his mouth. 

“Dont stop making those sweet sounds for me baby.” 

Your sleep shirt was gently pulled off your body and thrown behind you. “Oh Jesus,” Jake paused to stare at your tits, perfectly sitting against your chest. “Can I?” He gestured to them, eyes snapping across your face looking for any hesitation in your features. 

“All yours Jake.” You smirked at him. 

“Fuck..” he moaned. You felt as his lips circled perfectly around one of your nipples, his tongue flicking against the hard bud as his hands roughly squeezed them together. 

The feeling alone caused the hair on the back of your neck to stand at attention. You moaned softly and ran your fingers through his hair, scratching against his scalp softly as he switched to the other breast, giving it the same attention as the last. 

A slight nip caused you to hiss, then softly turn into a moan as he soothed the pain with his tongue again. His soft brown and bloodshot eyes snapped up to your face and he began to pull away. 

“How’s that my Clover?” His fingertips kneaded both of your nipples at once, before pulling them roughly causing another gasping moan to come out of your mouth and your head to tip back slightly. 

“Hmm, thought so..” 

His head dipped again to reconnect with your breasts when you pulled on his hair softly to stop him, his eyebrows furrowing at your action. 

“What's wrong?” 

“More Jake..” 

You grabbed one of his hands confidently and guided him back to the waistband of your sleep shorts, “Please.” 

He smirked at you, a condescending grin spreading across his face, “Someone’s needy.” 

Your skin felt like it was on fire as he re-traced his way across your waistband, dipping his fingertips underneath the elastic band and lower against the mound of your pelvis. 

He giggled softly, “Don’t think for a second Clover that you are in charge, you just happen to be lucky enough that I feel just as needy for you right now.” 

His voice was gravely and the hair on your arms stood at attention as the feeling of his fingertips dipped between your folds cautiously. 

“Oh fuuck Y/N,” he moaned, fingers dipping lower through your wetness as he eyes followed where his hand was hidden away. “You’re so fucking wet.” 

You leaned your forehead against his, “All your fault.” 

Your head tipped back suddenly as you felt his fingertips circle against that soft spot you loved on your clit and then quickly dipped down to your entrance, sliding two fingers into you easily. The stretch of his fingers felt like heaven. You became immediately addicted to the feeling of Jake stretching you out. You were convinced for a moment as his fingers curled slightly that you would be satisfied like this for the night. His fingertips curled with more purpose as the breath was stolen from your lungs, the delicious pressure against that hidden spot tucked away inside of you. 

He clearly had other ideas as he flipped you over on the couch quickly. You let out a breathless laugh as you felt him rip your sleep shirt away from your body. Your chest was left balancing against the arm of the couch as you listened to the soft clink of his belt coming loose and his own shirt and pants were ripped away from his body. 

“Oh my fuckin God Y/N. You look fucking perfect like this for me.” He moaned. You could feel his fingers drag slowly up your spine and  across the back of your neck. You whimper as he twists his fingers into the hair at the nape of your neck and pulls your head up roughly. You gasp and clench around nothing at the sensation as you feel his lips graze your ear, “This never happened, got it?” 

You didn’t have the time nor the mental capacity to understand what his words had really meant in the moment, you were blinded by pure lust. 

You did your best to twist your head to the side and you flashed him an almost evil smile, “Yes Sir.” 

He was fucked. 

He knew in that moment there was no forgetting this moment like he had originally planned. He knew deep down he would crave your body more and more each day he didn’t get to touch you like this. You were now the most addicting drug on the planet. 

As he dragged himself against your wetness already on the brink of ecstasy, fingers still bound tightly in your hair, he knew there wouldn't be any turning back. The gasping moan that came out of your plush, sweet mouth signed and sealed his fate in a matter of a second as he began to push himself inside of you. 

Your brain felt like fuzz as you felt him stretch you out slowly. The goosebumps that raised across your skin, and the tingling feeling in your core as you felt him push all the way inside of you was unlike anything you had experienced before. Maybe you would blame the gummy you had consumed prior to him coming over unbeknownst to him. Maybe you will blame the fact that it was simply just Jake. You wished so badly you could see his face as you heard him softly whimper behind you as he pushed himself as far as he could reach inside of you, applying the most delicious pressure against your cervix. 

His mouth dropped down against your ear once more, “Holy fuck Clover. You feel like fucking heaven.” 

You were putty in his hands at this point. As he pulled himself out and pushed back in cautiously, the feeling of him filling you up made your eyes roll to the back of your head. “Oh fuck..” You moaned. 

“Oh Jesus.” 

He pulled out and roughly slammed himself back into you again, eliciting a loud whimper from you. “Oh god Jake.” 

“Shh little Clover, hush now.” He said softly against your ear before pushing you against the arm of the couch. While he hadn’t moved much just yet, you already knew this position was about to push you over the edge quicker than either of you had expected. His hand that had roughly grabbed your hair now released and the pressure against your scalp diminished. The pain turned into soft pleasure fast as you felt him softly push your hair to the side so he could see your face. “Try and stay quiet baby.” 

You nodded as he pulled out and slammed back into you, your eyes going wide as you realized just how deep he truly was. 

He dragged in an out of you over and over and over again. He wasn’t gentle about it either. His full strokes made you feel like you were empty and full simultaneously. 

“Oh fuck Y/N, your pussy is-..ahhh fuck.” 

Oh, so he was a talker. 

All you could focus on was the feeling of him hitting your cervix, the delicious drag of him against your walls, the feeling of his fingertips flexing against your hips pulling you back against him and the sound of his necklaces hitting his chest in time with his thrusts. 

His pace sped up for a moment and you couldn’t hold yourself back anymore, “oh fuuuuhck Jake, yes yes please…” 

A loud crack rang out against the walls of the hotel room and you felt the burning sting of his hand print on your ass. 

“Fuck yes Clover, you look so fucking pretty like this. All wrapped around me so tight, fuck” 

You glanced back at him as best as you could from your position and immediately wished you hadn’t. He was focused on watching himself fuck you roughly, his eyebrows tipped up, his lips in the softest O shape. Almost as if he couldn’t believe it was happening. You clenched around him at the sight and his nose wrinkled on the side. A few pieces of his hair were now sticking to the side of his face. 

His eyes snapped up to your face, the sight of pure lust in his eyes was unfathomable. He pulled out suddenly and you whimpered at the sensation of feeling empty. 

“C'mere baby,” Jake pulled you up by your torso and promptly flipped you around on your back. “I want to see your face when we cum together.” 

Oh…

“Jake please..” 

His eyes focused back down onto your core as he dragged himself along you. The second his pushed past the threshold of your entrance his lidded eyes snapped back to your face. 

This angle sure was different, you immediately felt an even more pleasurable pressure dragging against your walls. 

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you let out a moan. Your eyes opening briefly as Jake’s hips began to snap against yours once more. The sight of his torso snapping against yours, the feeling of his finger tips gripping against your upper thighs. The fucking sound of his necklaces slamming back and forth against his chest. Not to mention the fucking expression on his face again. This same eyebrows furrowed again and the softest pout in his lips. You watched as he scrunched his nose again and again as he thrusted harder, faster, deeper.  

“Oh god dammit Jake!” You squeaked, your hands moving down to hold onto his thighs. 

He was hitting that hidden spot tucked away so secretly inside of you, you forgot it had even existed. He thrusted with such force that you could feel your body start to lose control and your legs begin to shake. 

“Oh fuck Jake I think I’m gonna cum soon…” 

His eyes snapped up to yours and he gave you the most evil looking smile. “Yeah Clover? You gonna cum all over my cock like a good girl? You gonna give it to me?” 

“Yes, yes Jake yes.” 

One of his hands released its grip on your thigh and trailed down to your clit, hard and waiting for some kind of stimulation. The second his thumb swiped against it briefly your back arched and you let out a long, breathless moan. His thumb only quickened its pace as soon as he felt you clench tightly around him. 

“Oh god yes Y/N,” his thrusts had not given in. His sweat was now dripping down his face, his chest. Just like when he played on stage.

“I’m there Jake, oh fuck yes I’m right there..” 

It started in your toes. 

It expanded to strictly your core. 

Then it traveled up throughout the rest of your body. 

Your eyesight went dark and you just heard ringing in your ears as the most intense orgasm ripped its way through your body. 

“Oh my god Y/N, yesss. You’re clenching me so tight. Please don’t stop, don’t fucking stop baby. I’m right here with you.” 

You could barely hear the praise from Jake over the ringing in your own ears. You felt your core try its hardest to clench around him but struggled due to his size. 

His thrusts became sloppy and slowed down and the most beautiful moan slipped past his lips. You hadn’t yet fully come down as he ripped himself from you and threw his head back with pleasure as you felt him release across your stomach. 

It took you both a moment to catch your breath. Your eyes finally met and you both smiled at each other, one huffing a laugh and the other giggling softly. 

“Holy shit.” You said. 

“Yeah, holy shit indeed Clover.” 

Jake leaned down and pressed a soft peck to your lips that you graciously reciprocated. 

“Hang tight darling, let me get something to clean you up.” 

You watched as Jake stepped back into his boxers, forgoing the sweatpants he had originally brought and walked away towards the bathroom. He made it back over to you pretty quickly and knelt down next to you. “Sorry about the mess.” He huffed a laugh as he dragged the warm washcloth against his release on your stomach..

You laughed out loud, “Jake! Oh my god!” 

“What!” He winked playfully at you. 

“Shut up!” 

“Awfully rude to say to someone who’s taking care of you.” He threw the rag on the opposite side of the room and kissed your temple. 

“Cmon Y/N,” he reached out his hand. “Come lay down with me.” 

You took his hand graciously and let him lead you to the side of the bed that was already slightly messed up due to your occupancy before he disturbed it. You laid down fully and allowed him to tuck you into the white bedding of the hotel bed. He placed a kiss softly on your forehead and leaned over to switch off the lamp next to you. 

You were engulfed in the dark, minus the little light from one of the plugs across the room. 

“Wait! Jakey..” You sat up as you heard him walk across the room. 

“What's wrong Clover?” 

“Please,” you said softly. “Please don’t leave me.” 

You felt the sheets pull back next to you and the bed dip with his weight. You laid back down against the pillow and waited for him to get adjusted. 

“C'mere lovey.” Jake's soft voice cut through the silent room. You scooted over to his side of the bed and found his arms already played open for you, welcoming your body against his. He tucked you under his chin, the scent of his cologne radiating off of his sweaty skin. The feeling of his heartbeat against your nose. 

“Get some sleep Clover, I don’t want you all crabby tomorrow.” 

“Shut up Jake.” You both giggled. 

September 11th 

STARCATCHER

Washington D.C. 

When you awoke in the morning, the sun was already peering through the curtains in the hotel room giving a soft glow to the walls around you. You stretched slightly and felt a slight ache in your muscles to which you grimaced. 

You were reminded of last night's late events and you quickly turned over to find your bed empty. 

Immediate disappointment radiated through your chest and your fear that something went wrong plagued your mind. 

Of course he wouldn’t stay with you. Of course he couldn’t stay with you. 

You rubbed the sleep from your eyes and turned over in search of your phone that was lost amongst the tangled sheets. It was show day, you had to make sure you weren’t running late. Sitting up in bed for a moment you immediately noticed the scent of Jake’s cologne now embedded onto your skin and in your hair. You took a moment to run your fingers through one side of your hair and subconsciously lifted a few strands to your nose and breathed in. The smoky amber and bergamot invading your senses. 

You ran your hands along the sheets and along the edges of your pillows in search of your phone, which proved to be successful. You clicked your screen alive, 9:34 AM. 

Shit. Shit! You were so late… 

You scrambled out of bed and completed a half ass morning routine, grabbing a single granola bar on the way out of your hotel room door. You couldn’t focus on anything else, not even what had occurred between you and Jake as your hands shook trying to reach out to one of the runners to come get you and take you to the venue. You had never, ever been late getting to the venue the morning of a show and of course it was the night after you hooked up with the lead guitarist. 

Arriving at the venue about 20 minutes later, you ran up to Rose immediately who looked slightly displeased with you and gathered her list of a few things to gather for the day. You had made your way to Jake’s dressing room, following the labeled songs from the team along the hallways and let out a soft breath as you pushed through the door. 

You dropped your bag off on one of the chairs and made eye contact with Jake across the room, the tension and anxiety in your chest easing slightly as you acknowledged that you were with your comfort person. 

“You snuck out this morning,” you smirked, a playful tone hinting in your voice. 

“Uh, yeah,” Jake paused, his lips forming a tight line.“Listen, Y/N..”

Your heart dropped instantly in your chest at the tone of his voice and lack of nickname he used to frequently with you. This wasn’t good.. 

You felt your heart skip a beat, the sweat beginning to pour from your palms, the-..

“Hey Y/N?” Nick popped his head into the room, hand gripping the side of the door. “Can I speak with you for a moment?” 

Your heart sank even further, this couldn’t be good. You had a keen sense for the tone of people’s voice, their body language, blame it on your past experiences I guess. And this was a double whammy.

“Uh, yeah sure.” You followed him closely, not a word spoken between the two of you as you followed him into an isolated room and he closed the door. 

“Listen, these conversations are never easy,” 

Your heart sped up as he crossed his arms and leaned against a table opposite from where you were standing. “Would you like to fill me in on what’s going on with Jake?” 

For a moment you were confused, had he been acting differently? Was there something you were supposed to report back? 

It finally clicked.

“What do you mean?” This couldn’t be true.

“What I mean is, someone has filled me in that Jake was leaving your hotel room at 5 am this morning. Care to elaborate?” 

Fuck. 

The room suddenly became a blur. You indeed, had been caught. Your mouth opened for a moment but you had no idea how to cover up what had happened, you knew your face turning beat red was giving you away by the second.

“Jake just needed something last minute he-..had called me and requested that I-..”

“You can save the excuses,” Nick held up a hand and you shut your mouth real quick. Your heartbeat is still loudly pounding in your ears. “I will only say this once. This is your first and final warning. If I or anyone else catches you with Jake alone past your normal hours without my knowledge either prior to or if you need to “assist him” late at night, I will be sending you on a plane home the very next day. Do we understand each other?” 

Your head bowed. How could you have been so stupid to let yourself get caught. This could end your career that you had been working so hard on building. 

“I understand.” 

“Great,” Nick uncrossed his arms and walked towards the door holding it open for you. “I will be keeping a close eye Y/N.” 

You exited the room and it felt like your world came crashing down on you all of a sudden. Your chest felt tight as you tried to take a deep breath and calm yourself down. You couldn’t believe you had let things go as far as they did, you barely even knew Jake when you really thought about it. Why did you let it go this far…and he just, left? Was he thinking the same thing? Were you just some random hook up to him? You felt like you were just an easy target..

You turned the corner and made your way back to  Jake’s dressing room, intent on grabbing your things and making haste to one of the runner so you could get the fuck out and do your job. You wanted to make yourself sparse from anyone, especially Jake who had clearly started to act weird towards you. You hated that the first thought in your head had been the realization that of course he would be acting weird after hooking up. That's probably all he wanted from you in the first place…You knew he was busy with his tech at the moment so he wouldn’t be in his greenroom right now. You definitely had the ability to sneak out for the day until you got close to soundcheck.

You dipped into the dressing room and closed the door behind you taking a moment to close your eyes and let out the breath you had been holding, head thudding against the back of the door. You were thankful for a moment of peace…

“Uh, can I help you?” 

A voice rang out from across the room. Your eyes snapped open at the sound of a woman’s voice. You made eye contact with a short brunette sitting on a stool not far from where you were standing. 

Who the hell..? 

You had suddenly found your voice after a moment, “Who are you? Do you have a pass?” 

The mystery woman snapped her gum out of clear annoyance and she pulled a pass card from her hip, “Clearly, who are you?” 

“I’m Y/N, I’m Jake’s assistant.” 

You watched as she looked you up and down, “Mmm.” She hummed and snapped her gum  before turning her attention back to her phone. “Can you go find him for me? Hes been gone a little while and left me waiting for a bit.” 

“Okay but who are-“ 

“Do you understand English?” Mystery bitch snapped. “Go. Find. Jake.” 

You couldn’t handle this. Not after that conversation with Nick. You spun out the door quickly as you could after grabbing your backpack in the corner. You desperately needed a moment alone. And to hell with finding Jake you needed to steer clear of him at this point. You needed clarity and you needed to ground yourself just for a moment outside. 

Your eyes started welling up with tears as your emotions began to overwhelm your system. You panicked a bit, you needed a moment of fucking peace. Unfortunately for you, Jake had spotted you from across the hall. He had been talking to Scott and while you two didn’t get a chance to finish your conversation from earlier, he gave you a curt smile. His expression quickly turned into a frown as he realized that you were upset and you realized he had abandoned his conversation and quickly began to walk towards you. “Y/N?”

Fuck. Get away from him. Get away now. 

You turned a corner and then another corner and then another, hoping that Jake eventually wouldn't be able to see where you had dipped off so quickly. You could still hear him calling your name, trying to push past people and curtains and crates to get to you. His voice finally sounded like it had disappeared just as the first tear fell from your right eye and you unfortunately had slammed into someone. 

“Woah!” 

Sammy. 

He gripped your shoulders to steady you and immediately you felt the tears begin to pour out of your eyes streaming down your cheeks at a rapid rate. “Y/N! What’s wrong?!” 

“There’s a girl,” you try to swallow but nothing was going down. “In-in Jake’s dressing room, I don’t know who she is but she has a pass. I'm just confused because I haven’t seen her, but I don’t know. I think I’m just-..She just caught me off guard and I’m just feeling overwhelmed and the moment and I just needed some fresh air an-..” 

“Woah slow down Y/N, what does she look like?” Sam’s fingers gripped your shoulders a little tighter. 

“Long brown hair, pretty..” 

“Oh shit,” He paused, the hands that were gripping your shoulders fell to his sides. “Jake’s girlfriend must be here…”

****************************************************

Taglist:

@anythingforjtk @jakesguitarsolo @do-it-jakey-baby @vanfleeter @violetstarcatcher @myownparadise96 @ignite-my-fire @gvfvanfleet @thetroublegetssoloud71 @gretavansara @edgingthedarkness @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface @spark-my-nature @torniturntomyarrow @starshine-gvf @heckingfrick @hollyco

If you would like to be added to the taglist please let me know !

[shslbunnylover]

hii, i wanted to request a fluffmas story. one with melissa x reader where it’s their first Christmas as a married couple and reader wants to make it as special as possible

★★★𝘼 𝙎𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞'𝙨 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙣 (12 𝙙𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙁𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛𝙢𝙖𝙨 𝘿𝙖𝙮 7: 𝙈𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙡𝙚𝙩𝙤𝙚 & 𝙂𝙞𝙛𝙩 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜★★★

Character: Melissa Schemmenti

Requester: Anonymous

Taglist: @inlovewithgreta @lilfartbox1 (Message me to be a part of the taglist until I get a page set up!!)

Trigger warnings (DL, DI): A couple mentions of sex,

Genre: Fluff (With hints of crack 😉)

A/n: Here ya go anon! Thanks for this request! It was perfect to add to this fic! (Also this gif goes perfectly with the story 🤭)

Word count: 2.0k

...

...

Being a Schemmenti came with a lot of perks. For one there was the delicious food served up by each family member, plus there was also the bonus of always knowing a guy and having kind in-laws. But for you, the biggest perk of being a Schemmenti was none other than the fiery redhead you were married to, Melissa.

She knew how to take care of herself and you, and she was kind and sweet to all of the kids she taught and every kid she didn't. Her figure was seductive, and her facial expressions would have you squirming in your seat like a schoolgirl who just got passed a note by her crush. The way she treated you in the bedroom made you feel like either a princess or a slut (In a good way of course) depending on your moods, and the way protectiveness she had over you made you feel loved and wanted.

The way your eyes looked at her was like a lovesick puppy looking at a bone, and she'd never let you forget about it.

"What is it with you and those puppy dog eyes?" She'd always ask you, and it would always result in you breaking out in a blush.

There was so much Melissa and the rest of the Schemmenti family had done for you, and all you wanted was to do something for the redhead you loved.

One thing you knew, was that being a Schemmenti meant that you knew how to pull off a plan.

And it all started with a simple shopping trip.

"And how much for the bat protector?" You asked, pulling out your wallet as your thumb ran through the stack of bills saved up inside the pocket.

"That'll be fifteen ninety-nine with tax," The man across the register smiled at you, scanning the item before putting it in a bag. "Is this your husband's Christmas present?"

"Wife's," You corrected him with a chuckle, grabbing the bag as you handed him the cash, placing the change in one of the pockets in your wallet.

"Oh, I see," He nodded, "Have a nice day. I hope she enjoys the cover!"

You walked out of the store in the mall, checking your phone for the time before you quickly ran down the stairs to the lower level of the building. You looked around for the back exit, sighing in relief once you finally found it.

"Now it's time for the best part of surprise 1," You thought out loud, going out through the door into the chilly air, only to be met with a familiar sight.

Anyone who knew Melissa knew she loved Philly and their sports teams, especially the Flyers mascot Gritty, so you found a hookup and paid him to sign the bat cover for Melissa's main Christmas present.

Even though you never got the whole hype around the guy, you just went along with it for Melissa, it was cute how happy she'd get.

"Hello there Gritty," You chuckled, handing him a stack of cash you had saved up from a couple of side hustles and working at extra-curriculars at Abbott (and using thousands of coupons with every purchase you would make through the year).

He simply waved in reply, keeping his public persona as a mascot even though it was just the two of you. The mascot took the tiny stack of cash in one of his large furry paws, putting it in his pocket while you took out the gift.

"Thanks again for coming," You smiled in gratitude, looking at the thing in front of you as you handed him the gift.

You watched as he signed it, secretly taking a photo of the sight before taking back the bat cover.

"You know you didn't have to do this-" You chuckled, pausing at the end. "You aren't going to reply, aren't you?"

The furry orange mascot shook his head, causing you to chuckle.

"Alright then, thanks again for this Gritty. I never got you, but if it makes Melissa happy then I'm all for it," You laughed.

Bored with the silence, you simply waved, saying your goodbyes before getting in your car.

"Mel's gonna love it..." You sighed, putting the gift in a special box you had bought.

"Hon?" Melissa hummed, hugging you from behind as you stood at the kitchen island, grading papers.

"Yeah, baby?" You asked, turning around to kiss her softly on the lips.

"You wanna watch a movie with me?"

"Of course!" You smiled in reply, grabbing her hand as the two of you sat on the couch.

"Wh-"

"No," You cut her off. "What do you wanna watch?" You smirked, looking at Melissa's slightly surprised expression.

"I was thinking of a Hallmark movie..." She replied, her voice going quiet out of embarrassment.

"Oh! That sounds awesome!" You beamed, "I told Jacob you had the best tastes in movies!"

"You are not telling him that I like these sappy ass Hallmark movies-" The redhead threatened, pointing at you.

"I'm not going to tell him, and you know that. I've kept a secret through three years of dating and almost a whole year of marriage," You rolled your eyes.

Melissa chuckled, pulling you close up against her body.

"You're a sweetheart, hon. You know that?" She smirked.

"Oh I know, that's why I'm planning on making this the best Christmas ever for you~" You replied with a wink, watching as a soft smile formed on her face.

"Any Christmas with you is the best Christmas ever," Melissa reassured you, pressing a kiss to your hair.

When Christmas day finally arrived, the two of you exchanged gifts like every year, but you kept the special gift until her family came over, much to her confusion.

"Trying to keep me waiting huh? It better not be anything dirty- You know Vinny will never allow me to let that go," Melissa looked at you with narrowed eyes as she swept the floors.

"It's not Mel!" You chuckled, finishing up your job of setting up the table and organizing the kitchen.

"Good-" The redhead looked at you. "I wouldn't mind it if it was~ I'd just prefer not to have my Ma look at any part of my sex life," She winked, causing you to blush.

"I don't want my mother-in-law looking at my sex life either Mel," You reminded her with a sassy tone. "That's why I'm now deciding to give it to you after they're here,"

But before Melissa could reply, the doorbell went off, just in time as the house had now been fully cleaned.

"Speak of the devil," You chuckled, running up to the door to let them in.

"Hey there Y/n!" Melissa's mom hugged you tightly, "How are ya?" She asked, kissing you on each cheek like she always did.

"I'm good Teresa, Mel is in the kitchen, everything is set out," You pointed in the direction of the kitchen before saying your greetings to everyone else.

One tradition you loved participating in was the Secret Santa, every year the Schemmenti would sit down and draw out of a hat who'd they get the gift for, but it was different. The gifts could only cost under 5 dollars.

But once everyone was handing out their actual gifts, you all would hand out the Secret Santa gifts, and the chaos would ensue.

"Oh my god- What the hell is this Vinny?" You exclaimed through laughter, holding up a toilet LED light.

"It was on sale! Amazon had it for 3 dollars!" The man defended himself. "Plus, we only had 5 dollars to spend!"

"What the hell made you think this was a good purchase?" Melissa cackled, bending over in laughter.

"Maybe you needed to see when you go to the bathroom at night!"

"We have light switches for that, you dumbass!" You laughed, holding your stomach as it began to hurt out of laughter.

"Oh, whatever! You just bought her a couple of scratch-offs!" Vinny replied, gesturing to Kristin-Marie as he tried to hold down his laughter (and failed miserably).

"At least those can make her money!" You scoffed, "Plus she loves those things,"

"She's got you on that one Vin-" Kristin-Marie chuckled as she looked at her scratch-offs.

"You all suck-"

"You love us though," Teresa said through her laughter.

Once everyone had gone home, you brought Melissa to the Christmas tree, picking up the box hidden in the corner as you looked at her.

"So are ya finally gonna show me what it is?" Melissa smirked, watching you stand back up, her smirk becoming a soft smile as she heard you starting to speak.

"Melissa, you've done so much for me, and I love you so much... Merry Christmas," You smiled, handing her the gift and watching as she opened it.

You watched as she picked up the cover, looking at the signature as her eyes widened and she covered her mouth.

"You're joking right?!" Melissa gasped.

You shook your head, showing her the photo you had taken a couple of days earlier when the mascot was signing the gift for her.

"It's real, I thought it'd be a nice cover for Edith," You chuckled, knowing how much she loved her emotional support baseball bat.

The redhead in front of you wiped a tear from her eye, smiling like a kid who had just gotten their favorite candy.

"I-I...I'm speechless," She whispered. "Thank you... All that effort you put into this means the world to me... You didn't have to,"

"But I wanted to, let me say I love you in my way," You replied. "Just this once?"

Melissa looked up a bit, noticing the mistletoe she had hung up a couple of days ago as a ploy to get more kisses from you.

"Then let me say I love you too," The green-eyed woman said in a soft and loving tone that you only heard in the privacy of your shared home before she pulled you into a deep kiss, her hands grabbing softly at every inch of your body.

"Mmmm..." You hummed in satisfaction after a minute passed and you pulled away for air. "So, was I right? Did I give you a good Christmas?"

Melissa nodded, hugging you tightly.

"The best Christmas ever,"

...

If you enjoyed reading this, don't forget to like, reblog and comment! Thank you and you are loved <3

-Akira

[ripplestitchskein]

I didn’t watch the video and I won’t because I don’t enjoy their takes or the way they present their content so I may be missing some in video context but someone mentioned something that really struck me this morning in the tags. I don’t add on to posts as a general rule unless I really feel the need, and this is in no way meant as a call out for either source but I do want to address the general idea presented.

Stolas was never triggered by Stella yelling at him so he should not have been triggered by Blitz yelling at him.

There are a few very glaring things about this idea.

First the entire premise that a person wouldn’t have different reactions to different people in their life doing similar things is kind of silly on its face. There are a number of reasons why you would have a disproportionate reaction to being yelled at by one person over another.

Being yelled at by a stranger in a public confrontation is much different than being yelled at by someone you know in a space you consider safe, for example. Being yelled at by someone you consider physically intimidating is much different than being yelled at by someone you don’t. Being yelled at in a professional space is much different than being yelled at in a personal one. Etc. etc. etc. They all produce very different emotions and very different responses.

There are a number of contextual circumstances that will change how someone reacts to a similar situation as well. The most obvious to apply here is the relationship dynamic between the individuals.

On the one side we have Stella who Stolas in no way wants to be with, who he has been forced to be with for 17+ years, and who has seemed fairly consistent in her treatment of him over that time period. Where we see Stolas in the narrative is after many years of putting up with her behavior. Not only would Stella’s yelling be something Stolas is probably a bit inured to after dealing with it for so long, but he has also trained himself to change his behavior to keep the peace as it were. On top of that he has spent the past 17 years pushing down his own emotions and reactions to provide a family environment for his daughter. And we do see Stolas react negatively to her abuse, he flinches, he drinks excessively, he takes medication to regulate his mood, he backs away from her, he modulates his behavior to placate her.

Blitz on the other hand is someone Stolas is emotionally invested in. He cares for Blitz and while Blitz is abrasive and crude we don’t have examples of him outright yelling in anger at Stolas. He has also mentioned multiple times that Blitz is the one who broke him out of this repression. Of course he would react differently to Blitz versus Stella, they are literally the two opposites ends of a core character conflict he has.

We must also consider the power dynamic. Up until this point Blitz went out of his way to maintain their relationship, he deliberately avoided confrontation. He states this directly in his part of the duet, we see it in his text messages or the lack there of, we have evidence of it with the sex chest and his little shopping spree. So from Stolas’s point of view this person yelling at him now has only ever accommodated him or avoided him before, which, while also being a huge issue in their relationship, also escalates the moment when Blitz does push back and break down.

Stella has none of this baggage, her yelling does not reveal hard truths Stolas has to also deal with and confront. Stolas can justify his behavior with her because she never cared for him anyway, he did not hurt her with his actions. Stella’s yelling does not come from a place of hurt and betrayal regarding Stolas as she never cared for him or their marriage anyway. He did hurt Blitz however, and that hurt is being presented to him in a very aggressive way, and he had hoped up until this point that Blitz cared for him as well. So not only does he now realize Blitz doesn’t care for him (or that’s how he interprets it) but that he also views him in this really horrible way, as someone who takes advantage of those lesser than him, that he is pompous and unfeeling and cruel. He is the monster he feared being.

Which leads me to the next glaring difference. Stolas spent however long preparing for this moment where he revealed his feelings, he was hopeful and excited and nervous. He is then, in his mind, rejected. He is experiencing a range of emotions during this confrontation that all come to a boiling point.

With Stella her yelling is not a building confrontation of emotional ups and downs, it’s an environmental constant. In just a matter of minutes with Blitz he goes from nervous hope to rejection to realizing the person he cares for thinks really terrible things about him and the manner in which that is revealed is extremely charged. There is a world of difference between something you expect to happen (Stella yelling) and something you didn’t. Stolas has no idea Blitz had these feelings inside him, that’s part of the problem, and they were revealed to him in a very crushing and intense way.

We also have to consider that these are not real people reacting to the situation as real people might. This is a story being told to us and the writers and animators are presenting what is relevant to that narrative and these characters in a very concentrated way. They only have so long to get a point across and they must continue the story by contriving reactions we would not see in reality. In this episode and in the story overall so far we are given all the information we need to see it from both points of view and see why each of them reacted in the ways we did.

With storytelling of this nature you are not in the character’s heads so you much rely on actions, dialogue (which can be reliable or not) and environmental cues to get these points across. They did a phenomenal job in my opinion.

We have both of their mental headspace’s at the beginning presented in song, we get an idea of where they are at when the confrontation begins, and where they end up is a natural conclusion to the high emotions on display. The atmosphere is tense and dark, it’s a building anticipation with the music and the silence and the lightning being used, how the shots are framed. We get a sense of Blitz chasing him down, weaving through hallways and kicking open doors. It’s cinematic, because it’s a visual medium. Stolas HAD to remove Blitz from the situation in order to continue the narrative, he has magic in this story so he sends him away. In the real world there would be a lot of “Get out.” “No.” “I said get out” etc etc but that’s not interesting for the audience and in this world we have magic so whoosh, out he goes, the conflict continues into the next episode.

There are a number of things I could discuss related to domestic violence, or emotional triggers, or trauma responses but I don’t think that’s necessary here. Not only are these not real people and we are not privy to all of the baggage they have, how their individual brains process it and how they respond to it but the storytelling method is not conducive to those kind of real world considerations. What we do know is people react to different things in different circumstances with different people and the narrative absolutely justified Stolas’s response to Blitz and its contrast to his responses to Stella.

That is actually kind of the whole point?