#if my art looks a little different it's def cause I'm trying a new style and not cause I forgot about Roland's birthday until yesterday ;)

[justastrugglinghotchocolate]

Happy Birthday to this asshole!

Will be slowly coming back, though maybe not as frequently on tumblr as i used to be :)

[tinx-methinks]

43, 44, 45, and 49! 💕

Thank you lovely~! I was hoping I'd get more than one of these. <3 Hope you're ready for this answer lol

43. Title of a book you own that’s in the worst physical condition you have. Explain what happened to it. Post a picture if you want.

I waited till now to answer this cause I wanted to include a picture of my shame and these books were tucked safely away in the back of my bedroom bookshelf where my partner was sleeping so I couldn’t get them. Confession time: I love reading in the bath. And in the days before my waterproof ereader I have destroyed a book or two simply by rereading it and exposing it to my wet and wild habit over and over. Please don’t judge me for the severity of these pictures, it was a different time.

All trigger warnings for severely abused books apply.

That is my copy of The Good the Bad and The Undead by Kim Harrison which is the second book in her The Hollows/Rachel Morgan series and the first one I read after finding it in my dad’s rejected books pile. It’s probably the book I’ve reread the most besides Reaper Man by Terry Prachett as I recall finishing it on occasions and immediately restarting it. I loved it. I actually own three copies of this book. This one. A digital copy in a full series omnibus. And another copy of the paperback bought recently as I’d love to own the entire series so I’m trying to pick the ones I’m lacking. 

The second is my copy of Darkfever by Karen Marie Moning this is the first book in her Fever series which I to this day haven’t finished but at the time it was a favored because of its interesting world building, angst ridden characters, and of course the sexy potential of its (poorly aged!) love to hate ‘em alpha-male romantic interests. Still I used to wait for each new book of the series to be available at the library and while I waited I used to reread my copy of this one to keep the characters fresh in my mind. Funfact: I also bought a digital bundle of this series which I was reading as my “work book” (the book I only read at work) for a while. And I made it all the way to where I originally stopped. The last book in the original series, book five: Shadowfever. I made it halfway through it when the lockdowns hit and at that point I didn’t want to start reading my work book at home so I still haven’t finished it. That’s probably ok though, while I enjoy the nostalgia of the characters and world it’s not so great in 2023! 

So yeah I think they’re both pretty banged up but I think Darkfever might be a little worse? It certainly feels worse to the touch! Pages clumped and stuck together and edges destroyed. Its more waterdamaged at least, but the other one is split down the middle so I guess that’s also pretty bad! I'm posting both tho because the other one def looks worse.

44. The book(s) whose stories have become part of your very makeup.

Reaper Man. Dragonlance: Chronicles, Legends, Tales, the Lost Chronicles, and the Raistlin Duology in particular. The Count of Monte Cristo. Cyrano De Bergerac, The Art of Asking. American Gods. Countless short stories, fairy tales, myths and legends. The first six books of The Hollows series by Kim Harrison also need to be mentioned. Particularly the one above. You can’t imagine how mortified I was when I got my partner to read them and he commented “Hey, you, like, took some of your personality from these didn’t you?” Yeah. Probably bruh. But you don’t have to call me out like that.  Books five, seven, and eight of the Women of the Otherworld Series probably deserve an honorable mention for the same reason tbh. More recently I think the series of Bring Me Their Hearts, and The Library of the Unwritten definitely rewrote something in my brain. 

45. What book(s) would you sell your soul to get a TV or movie adaptation of?

Listen the other day I was imagining a Monty Python style variety show adaption of Daniel M Lavery’s book Something that May Shock and Discredit You which a WILD PULL but the only answer I have for you right now. I think it would have animated parts like Python did but they’d be stylized like The Simpson’s animation. I don’t fantasize about adaptations but I think they really work best for children’s books so if you made me answer seriously I guess I’d go with The Tales of the Frog Princess by E.D. Baker and maybe that should’ve been in the question above too lol. 

49. Do you prefer hopeful, humorous, very emotional or darker books?

I think I tend to err toward darker and angstier books. I get a lot of catharsis from them but I think most of the time books like The Bone Orchard or Leech or Iron Widow or whatever I’m reading that deals with dark topics usually benefit from that undercurrent of hope. I don’t think dark and emotional needs to lack hope and I tend to most enjoy ones that allow space for both. 

That being said I read a lot and I think what I like most is having options and variety.

Asks for Bookworms here

[defdaily]

GQ Korea Magazine June 2021 issue featuring JAY B: in transition

To prove himself, JAY B is constantly changing. Because he has so much to show.

Translated by defdaily

Your greeting from the video earlier was new. You said “This is GOT7’s JAY B and H1GHR MUSIC’s JAY B.” After GOT7 parted ways with JYP Entertainment, you told fans that you were a freelancer and I guess you’ve found your spot.

Yes. It has not been announced officially yet but I’m H1GHR MUSIC’s JAY B. I told fans I was a freelancer as a joke. I like communicating with fans as if we’re friends. But I was looking for a company at that time too.

How did you make your decision?

Of course I thought about it a lot. I talked with various companies, but when considering the freedom and synergy, I felt like H1GHR MUSIC fit me well. That seemed like the best decision.

What kind of synergy and effect are you looking forward to?

I don’t think “I’m definitely hip-hop!” just because I joined a hip-hop label. I think that through the label I can show R&B, dance and pop genres too. I want to attempt different things without any boundaries.

What did you talk about with H1GHR MUSIC’s CEO Jay Park?

From my point of view, it’s a new challenge so I was a little anxious. But Jay Bum hyung’s thoughts were similar to mine and said I could do music comfortably and didn’t wish for any certain colour, because if you keep focusing on one thing, you’ll slowly be locked in it, and said it’s good to try out different things. That’s what he told me.

Will this period of time divide JAY B of the past and future?

Of course it will. If previously it was a situation where I mainly received benefits from the company, now that I have the autonomy, I feel that I should do things myself and I grew a deeper sense of responsibility in that way. I think there’s a need to be more proactive. And I plan on prudently moving forward one step at a time with an appropriate amount of nervousness. Because this is the process of starting from the beginning, I am very careful about every decision.

What factors influenced your decision the most?

Feeling/intuition. I have a feeling of whether I think I should do something or not.

It feels like you have a pretty good sense of the direction you want to move forward in.

I asked Jay Bum hyung why he recruited me and he said that skills were of course a factor but that I seemed like I would work hard consistently. It’s a given to be working hard on your own things but the most important thing is consistency. I've been doing that for a long time, and I'll continue to do what I've been doing.

Do you have any values that you’ve held on for a long time?

I’ve always thought that it’s important to never forget the things that I’ve done and have been doing. I debuted as GOT7. I cannot just suddenly say “I’m not an idol,” and I do not want to disappoint the fans. I’m very thankful. While promoting as part of GOT7, I never forgot the fact that I started as a b-boy at first and that I’m a person who likes hip-hop.

People’s expectations are high because of GOT7’s achievements. On one hand, there must be people viewing you thinking ‘let's see how well it could go.’

I am mindful of that. But it’s just GOT7 JB that was that big, JAY B as an individual isn’t that great. To be honest, sometimes I think that I’m nothing. If you ask people my age which idols they know, even if many people know about GOT7, they might not know me very well. It’s important to be acknowledged for my music but I feel like I have to get my name out there first. There is someone called GOT7’s JAY B, H1GHR MUSIC’s JAY B. I feel like this is just the beginning for me.

It sounds like you are at a point where you feel the need to prove yourself. Do you not worry that fans might not be accepting if you do what you like and want to do?

Rather than being worried, I see it as something that could happen. For example, I could use profanity or harsh expressions if I feel that they’re needed for better musical completion. I can’t help it if some fans who used to like me as an idol hear that and turn their backs. I also don’t want to give up or lose my own standards because of such reactions.

I see you're very determined to make creations of your own. I heard that you're going to release a new song soon. How is it?

The title is Switch It Up. Should I say it’s close to Hip-Hop Dance? It’s a different style from what I have been making consistently under the name Def. You could say it is a little similar to the solo songs I’ve included in GOT7 albums before. I focused on the purpose of informing the public and the music scene that “I think I will do this sort of music in the future." I’m also sending a message to fans saying that I’ll be starting to promote actively again so look forward to it.

I'm curious. Is there any image that came to mind while working on it?

A sexy image. If I use Def. to freely express my personal stories in any genre, I made a distinction that JAY B does cool and sexy music. Regardless, they are both me, but JAY B is more like a fictional character who can show various sides of me.

What do you think are your strengths as an artist?

There is no such thing. I never thought that an artist should be a certain type of way. I think an artist is one who lives the same life as others, but feels differently, and knows how to express that well. As a matter of fact, anyone can do that. Even everyday office workers, when their stress piles and piles and they scribble down their emotions then toss the paper out, I think that can be a way of art too.

I like that. In any form, what do you want to talk about the most now?

That’s what I’m contemplating a lot right now. I think I’ve been pouring out too much. When writing songs, making the melody or arranging the music isn’t that hard but I don’t know what to write about. The same goes for coming up with titles too. No matter how hard I try to come up with an idea, I can’t think of one. I just think, “ I guess it'll just come out gradually.”

Not as JAY B but as Lim Jaebeom, what have you been thinking about or trying to do?

I try to think positively.

Ah not long ago, we saw you posted on your Instagram “Let’s try to think positively.”

I had quite a lot of worries and a negative mindset. A lot of people may live with unnecessary worries but I’m a little worse. I guess it’s my nature. So I try my best to relax my heart/mind and say “it’s good,” “everything will be okay.”

In introspection, what is something that you are most satisfied with?

That’s hard. No matter how hard I think about it, I feel like there's nothing I like about myself at the moment.

Why? Did something change?

No, it’s not that. Even with one thing, one day you could like it and another day you could dislike it. It’s natural to change your mind. So when I speak, I often use the terms “always” and “at the moment.” Anyways, it’s not that I think that my current self is completely bad, but I’m not satisfied to the point where I would go “wow.”

Then, among the various images that you embody, which do you feel is the piece of clothing that fits perfectly?

I think naturally, the clothing of the name Lim Jaebeom is the most natural and comfortable. Because I’ve got a good hold of the side that is most like me, there can exist Def., JAY B of GOT7 and JAY B of H1GHR MUSIC. Oh, I could explain it like this. If Lim Jaebeom is the earth, just as there exists oceans, mountains, and cities within it, there are various sides of myself that are making up my life.

What will happen to GOT7 in the future?

We probably will not be able to promote as actively as before, but the members and I are trying our best to do anything. I often look up and watch videos of when we were promoting and I miss the GOT7 from those days. The overflowing passion and energy as well. Looking back, it was really fun. It's similar to the feeling of reminiscing about school days.

What did you gain personally from the past 7 years promoting as GOT7?

Should I say, I think I’ve gained expertise? People around me say I’ve become much more relaxed now. But I still get nervous. I was nervous even before today’s shoot. But in turn, I’ve gained ways to overcome the nerves. I guess that comes to show that I’ve become experienced

What kind of person does Lim Jaebeom want to be?

I wish I could be endlessly kind and do only good things, but in reality, that’s impossible. As you live you could unintentionally make mistakes and cause disappointment. Nevertheless, I definitely do not want to become a shrewd person, I despise being scheming and fooling people. I don’t want to be that kind of person and neither do I want to be on the receiving end. But it’s still a bit of a mystery if it’s okay to say "I'm going to be this kind of person." Because as I mentioned before, my current feelings and thoughts change frequently just as trends do.

I guess those words right there can change too.

That’s right. That's why I'm cautious about doing interviews. If I talk about something, there will be articles pouring out that say JAY B said this and JAY B said that. Although we’re doing an interview today like this, if I was asked the same question tomorrow, I could have a different response.

How should we wrap up this interview for you to sleep soundly?

This was the story of Lim Jaebeom on May 4th, 2021. I think this will be okay.

Translated by defdaily.