#if i could i'd get a smaller fridge than the normal ones

[madiomens]

Hi! I actually have a request! Can we have noahx reader who is a musician asking him to produce her music? You can choose between fluff or smut buf I'd like to read about a relationship!

Hi! I actually really enjoyed writing this <3

You get fluff AND smut ;) It's long as hell but I hope you enjoy!

Thank you for requesting!

(I've never written anything using Y/N because I try to avoid it, but it is used once or twice in this since it was unavoidable. So don't hate me for it plz <;3)

Warnings: pure filth

Produce Me

I am not ok.

I am not fucking ok.

My friend's birthday was last night, and we all got entirely too wasted. And my drunken ass DM'd none other than Noah Sebastian, of THE Bad Omens, to produce my music. I gave a stupid, misspelled blurb about how I am a struggling rock artist who needed someone to take a chance on. Topping it off, I attached a voice note of one of my song recordings I had made in my makeshift studio in my house.

And he FUCKING REPLIED.

My hands shook as I stared at my phone in shock.

"Hey! I actually think your sound is sick and I would love to meet with you to talk more about you and your music. What if we met at the studio today? Say around 4?"

This can't be real life. I must still be drunk, right? Gotta be.

I blinked my eyes a few times and pinched myself to ensure I was in fact sober and that this was real life before typing back a message.

"Hey there! 4 sounds great. What studio?" I typed back, throwing my phone and covering my eyes as if it would erase what was currently happening.

A few moments went by before my phone buzzed and I was throwing myself across the couch to grab it. He attached the address along with a 'Can't wait' that sent me into a whole screaming fit. I looked at the time on my phone, which read 1:30 PM and I scrambled to my feet to find my belongings so I could rush home to get ready. I stumbled over the sleeping bodies spread out around the floor, gathering my things and rushing out the door.

I sent a quick text to my friend explaining what was going on before getting in my car and zooming to my house. Once inside, I took the quickest shower of my life before applying some light makeup and throwing on a pair of ripped jeans and a hoodie. It took everything in me not to throw on a Bad Omens hoodie, but I decided that would look like I was trying too hard. I grabbed my flash drive with my songs I've made and a croissant along with a water bottle from my fridge before flying out my front door. I slid in my car and gripped the steering wheel, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath to try and calm my nerves

He's just a regular guy helping a regular girl get her music produced.

He's not an extremely successful rockstar who I've had the fattest crush on for forever.

Totally normal.

It was a short drive to the studio, and before I knew it I was pulling up with 10 minutes to spare. I took another deep breath before climbing out of my car and heading inside the building. I ran my fingers through my still slightly wet waves before walking through the door, eyes instantly landing on the lanky man sitting on the couch across the room. He had his hood up over his head and was scrolling on his phone, sunk lazily down in the couch.

I tried to calm the pounding in my chest at the sight of him, taking a few moments in the doorway to mentally prepare before walking towards him.

"Noah?" I questioned as I got closer.

His head popped up and a grin slid onto his face as he pushed off the couch, putting his phone into his pocket.

"You must be Y/N." He said, extending his hand to me.

I nodded with a smile. "I am, nice to meet you." I said as I shook his hand, mine much smaller than his and feeling like a toddler's hand.

"Nice to meet you. I'm really excited to work with you. You have a sick voice." He said as he dropped my hand, grin still on his face.

My smile widened. "You have no idea how much that means to me. Thank you."

"'Course. Follow me." He said, nodding his head in the direction of a hallway.

I followed behind him down the corridor, walking into the room at the end of it. He shut the door firmly behind us and gestured to a chair at the large soundboard in the center of the room. I took a seat and he followed, scooting the chair so that his knee rested against mine.

"So," He started, messing with a few buttons in front of us. "I already set up the audio clip you sent me to play over the speakers so we can get a deeper listen. I won't lie, I already played it once and it sounds even sicker in here."

I grinned at him. "Let's hear it."

He pressed play and the sound of my voice rang out around us, my raspy tones more enhanced by the sound system set up. I looked at him in awe as I listened, Noah meeting my eyes with a wide grin.

"See?" He questioned as the clip finished.

"Holy shit." I said through a chuckle.

He nodded and rubbed his hands together. "Please tell me you have more for me."

I opened my purse and pulled out the flash drive I brought, placing it in the palm of his hand. "There's three finished songs on this. I recorded them in my makeshift studio, so they definitely don't have the production quality you're probably used to." I said, all of a sudden getting shy about my work.

He shook his head and gave my arm a light comforting squeeze. "If you knew where I started you wouldn't be saying that." He said with a chuckle.

"Trust me, I've heard it all." I wanted to say but bit my tongue, settling on a chuckle of my own.

The next hour was spent with Noah playing the songs I provided and praising them, making comments about little tweaks and twists he would do to them. He played with the sound board some to add in his vision, blowing my mind with how his own mind works. It came so effortlessly to him. He could imagine something and make it come to life with the twist of a few knobs and pressing a few buttons.

By the end of the session, it was pushing 10 PM and I was officially fully comfortable with him. We had a balance of joking around along with working on my music, making the whole process so much easier. At one point he had pressed record while I laughed at a joke he made and insisted I put it in one of my songs.

"If you don't, I'm going to. I might still do it anyways." He said with a chuckle.

That was quite hard to contain my excitement over.

We agreed to meet at the studio most days for the next couple of weeks to fully work on what I have created already and to create all the songs I had written in my home studio.

Every day that we met, Noah surprised me with different mixes he had worked on his own time at his house. He was extremely flexible with my work hours, always down to meet at the studio whatever time I got off work.

"Do you ever sleep?" I asked with a laugh when I walked into the studio at 8:30 PM a week later, coffee in hand for both of us.

He turned to look at me, stubble starting to form on his face, and letting out a laugh of his own. "Not when I'm inspired."

I shook my head at him and took my seat by his side, sliding the coffee across the table. He sighed and hugged the coffee to his chest. "You are an angel. Thank you."

I smiled and took a sip of my own coffee. "The least I can do."

He wrapped his arm around my shoulders in a side hug, causing me to rest my head on his shoulder to return it. The scent of his cologne filled my senses and sent a jolt of electricity through me. I blinked myself out of the trance as he broke the hug, clearing my throat and turning to face him.

"What have you created now?" I questioned, trying to calm the butterflies.

"You're gonna fucking love it." He said, excitement on his features as he pressed play.

It was my favorite song that we've recorded in the past week, but something was different about it. I listened closer for a few moments before gasping and smacking him in the arm.

"That's your voice!" I exclaimed as he laughed at me.

He turned down the song, letting it play quietly in the background. "You talked about wanting it to have background vocals that weren't your own so I thought I'd add some in to see how it sounds. You like?" He questioned, crooked grin on his face.

"Do I like it?" I questioned. "I fucking love it!"

He grinned and bit his bottom lip as if to stifle the size of his smile. "I hoped you would."

"Can I keep them on the song?" I questioned, poking my bottom lip out.

He chuckled and shook his head, pinching my bottom lip I had poked out. "I can't say no to that face."

I clapped, giddiness filling me up. "Noah Sebastian, you are fucking amazing."

"I'm alright, nothing amazing." He said as the song came to an end, looking away from me.

I could swear a blush creeped up his cheeks as he pulled his hood further around his face, hiding the color from me.

"No, I'm serious." I said, squeezing his arm so he would meet my eyes again. His cheeks were still a light shade of pink once he faced me again, a sparkle in his eyes and shy smile on his face. "You're amazing." I said more firmly, staring into his eyes.

He brought his hand up to squeeze mine that was still on his arm. "Thank you, Y/N. That means a lot."

I nodded. "Of course. It's true."

His eyes searched mine, hand still on top of my own and neither of us daring to break contact. My heart leapt into my throat as he slowly started to lean in, eyes darting between my lips and back up to my eyes as if asking permission.

"We shouldn't." I whispered, own eyes darting down to his lips.

He slightly shook his head. "We shouldn't." He whispered back.

"I don't want to ruin the working relationship we have." I whispered again, voice even softer as my common sense slowly started to chip away the more his scent wrapped around me.

"I don't want that either." He whispered, a huskiness taking over his voice and sending shivers down my spine.

He paused right in front of my face, lips barely ghosting against mine as we stared into each other's eyes. Our breathing sped up and mingled together, the air around us thick with tension as neither of us dared to make the move but both wanting so badly to do so.

We stared into each other's eyes a few more moments before he spoke up. "Fuck it."

He pressed his lips against mine, pulling my wheeled chair closer to him so that his knees were on either side of mine. Butterflies exploded throughout my body as I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, his own snaking around my waist. I pressed my body flush against his as I opened my mouth to let his tongue tangle with mine, the taste of him filling my taste buds and causing my core to throb. I stood up so that I could straddle him in his chair, my lips never leaving his. He brought a hand up to grip the hair at the nape of my neck and causing me to moan into our kiss at the feeling. I pushed the hood off his head so that I could tangle my fingers through his hair, lightly pulling and causing his own moan to escape him.

I pulled back breathlessly, placing my hands on his cheeks. "What are we doing?" I questioned.

He shook his head, lips swollen. "I don't know. But I don't want to stop."

"God, me either." I said before slamming my lips back onto his.

He picked us up, causing me to tightly wrap my legs around his waist as he carried us to the leather couch on the back wall of the room. He sat down so that I was straddling him, his hands resting on my ass and giving it a squeeze. I ground my hips into his, the feeling of his growing erection sending a shockwave through my core. He let out a deep moan as I did this, moving my ass so that I did it again. He brought a hand to the front of my leggings and slipped it underneath the waistband, landing on my bare clit as I decided to forego panties today. I gasped against his lips, breaking the kiss so that our lips were brushing against each other's.

"Is this ok?" He questioned breathlessly, finger resting on my clit.

I nodded, eyes meeting his as my mouth hung open. "More than ok." I breathed out.

His finger started to circle my clit, causing my eyes to close as my head dropped backwards. A moan escaped me while his finger magically worked on me, easily sliding throughout my arousal.

"God, you're so wet." He breathed out huskily, placing a trail of hot kisses down my neck.

I circled my hips against his finger, the pit in my stomach growing faster than I'd ever experienced before. I tangled my hands in the hair at the nape of his neck, pulling tightly. I began to loosen my grip in worry that I was hurting him but paused when a moan escaped him when I pulled tightly. My moans got louder and I smacked a hand over my mouth to muffle them, worrying anyone else in the building would hear.

"The studio is soundproof. Let me hear those pretty sounds." He said against my neck, biting down on the skin.

I dropped my hand from my mouth and gripped his shoulder tightly, hips still circling his fingers. My moans sped up as my orgasm quickly built, my release getting closer and closer.

"Noah, you're gonna make me cum." I moaned out, bringing my head forward to rest on top of his.

He brought his free hand up to grip my chin, raising it so he could meet my eyes. "Cum for me. Let it all go, angel."

My brows furrowed and my jaw went slack as I was on the brink of my orgasm, hips speeding up as his finger did the same. My moans hit a higher pitch before my orgasm exploded, causing me to toss my head back and cry out at the pleasure coursing through my body.

"That'a girl." He praised, placing more kisses on my neck.

I brought my head forward, resting my forehead against his as my chest heaved and he worked me through my high. My body twitched against his while his finger slowly circled my sensitive clit, causing me to grip his shoulders tightly. My eyes slid shut while I took deep breaths to return my breathing to normal and he peppered kisses against my cheeks before landing on my lips. He broke the kiss and pulled his hand out of my pants, licking his fingers clean of my arousal. I rolled my bottom lip into my mouth and stifled a moan at the sight before grabbing his face and pressing my lips onto his, tasting myself on his tongue.

"Fuck me, Noah." I mumbled against his lips.

He growled into the kiss and flip us so that I was on my back and he was hovering above me. He stood up to pull his shirt off along with his pants and I did the same, drinking in the sight of his naked body. My eyes dropped to his erection, precum gathering on the tip as he slid his hand down his length.

My core throbbed at the size of him and I reached my hand in his direction. He walked closer and I grabbed his erection, sliding my hand up and down while using my thumb to smear the precum down the length of him. A soft moan escaped him before he crawled on top of me, pressing his lips to mine.

"Are you.." He mumbled against my lips, almost unable to finish his sentence.

"I'm clean and on birth control." I mumbled back, reaching between us to rub my thumb over the tip of his dick.

"I'm clean too." He said, kissing me harder.

I kissed him back, rubbing my thumb back and forth and causing him to moan against my lips. "Then get inside of me."

Those words were all it took for him to slide his length between my lips before sliding all the way into me, my arousal making it easy for him to fully enter me. We broke the kiss to gasp at the feeling, my legs coming up to wrap around his waist.

"Noah." I breathed out, placing my hands on his cheeks. "Don't go easy."

His eyes darkened as I said this. He pulled his hips back before slamming them into mine, causing me to cry out in pleasure. He placed his hands on my hips and squeezed hard as he began thrusting into me harshly, undoubtedly leaving bruises behind for later. His name fell from my lips in moans over and over the more he thrust into me. He leaned back and pulled my legs up so that they rested over his shoulders, squeezing my knees together. I gasped at the new angle, his thrusts perfectly hitting my g spot and my legs rubbing together stimulating my clit.

"Fuck." I moaned out, tossing my head back into the couch. I squeezed his thighs with my hands, nails digging into his tattooed skin.

"You feel so fucking good." He moaned, placing a kiss then a bite on my ankle.

"God, you're making me feel so good." I said, opening my eyes to look up at him.

The more he thrust into me the more my second orgasm built up, turning me into a moaning mess beneath him.

"You're gonna cum again, I can feel it." He groaned, thrusts staying at a steady pace. I nodded as my moans sped up, eyes squeezing shut. "Let go again. You can do it."

My breathing sped up before I was screaming his name, my second orgasm of the night crashing over me like a tidal wave. His thrusts slowed down to work me through my high again, body twitching underneath him.

"Fuck." I breathed out, eyes opening back up to meet his.

He smirked and leaned down to kiss me, my legs draped across his shoulders. "Good girl." He said against my lips before starting thrusting into me again.

My knees were to my chest and ankles over his shoulders as he kissed me, his thrusts becoming sloppier as his own orgasm crept up on him.

"I'm so fucking close." He growled against my lips, hand coming up to squeeze my neck.

My mouth dropped open as he squeezed me, more pleasure shooting through my body. "Cum for me, then." I breathed out, eyes locked onto his.

His brows furrowed. "Goddamn, you feel so good." He whined.

I bit my bottom lip as I watched his face contort in pleasure, a few more sloppy thrusts into me before he was pulling out and cumming on my stomach. Whines and whimpers mixed with his moans escaped him, his eyes rolling back as his body shook with his orgasm. I drank in the sight of him coming undone between my legs, committing everything to memory.

He sighed and dropped his head once his high calmed down, placing a kiss on my ankle. He slowly lowered my legs so he didn't hurt me before grabbing a few tissues from the table beside us to clean both of us off. He squeezed himself between me and the couch, turning me on my side so that we were face to face and his arm was draped across my waist.

"Hi." He breathed out.

I giggled, pushing the hair off of his forehead. "Hi."

"That is not how I expected tonight to go." He said, eyes shut in exhaustion.

I chewed on the inside of my lip to stifle the smile that threatened to slide onto my face. "Are you mad about it?"

His eyes popped open as he quickly shook his head no, causing me to laugh. "Not at all. I wouldn't be mad if it happened again, either."

I grinned and pressed my lips onto his.

"Me either."

[skylertheminish]

Warning! Absolute dog water writing! I'm tired and can't think straight to save myself so apologies in advance. I'm not responsible for any cringe damage (might tidy it up at least come tomorrow. No promises).

"I know it's cold. I'm sorry lass" I sighed " I wouldn't wake you without reason". My efforts to calm her were not very effective what with my attention being split between driving and calming the young protesting Ceruledge. I had no choice! She had to come with me. Wouldn't mind the cries too much but we didn't even have time to warm the engine let alone the car.

" please stop kicking the blanket off, it will keep you warm".

After a few hours, most of which spent being stuck in traffic, she finally calmed down and fell asleep. No small part to her protesting and taking her frustration out on her toys for sure. But the call I got from the centre suggested bringing her along. A pokemon exotic to Galar, much like the tiny, sleeping knight beside me, was surrendered to them. Makes a pleasant change from the mills that's for sure. Yet I couldn't shake off this uneasy feeling.

Sitting behind this red light in the countryside at the dark hours of dawn was certainly not helping things. "... oh for the love of- change already! Been sat here for 20 minutes" I growled, being careful to not wake her less she start protesting again.

After what felt like an eternity, we finally made it to our destination... some 2 hours later than expected. Seems that setting off at 6 in the morning to beat the morning rush was a forlorn hope. Waking the tiny Ceruledge from her sleep, I was able to calm her with a warm meal from the mini fridge while fitting her harness. Prepared to leave the warmth of the car and face the bitting cold we made our way to my workplace. "Sorry I'm late".

Ceruledge ran eagerly inside before I could elaborate on my untimely arrival, clearly eagerly to greet all the staff the only way she knows. By happily beeping at them. Least that's what I thought as that's. Instead of dragging me to the reception, she took me to one of the rooms used to greet new pokemon. Of which was occupied by a smaller than normal Armarouge.

There was the cause of my uneasy feeling.

"A surrender huh" I sighed

Yet another premature evolution. The Armarouge looked over to us, trying his best to stay calm and collected despite his tears betraying just how hurt he was. Armarouge are incredibly loyal Pokemon.

In a lapse of concentration the little Ceruledge seized the chance to escape and head over to the other pokemon. Normally I'd go to retrieve her but not this time. She ran over to the child Armarouge as fast as she could, and gave him the biggest hug she could muster.

Rubbing the runaway tears from his eyes, the other glanced down and saw the tiny knight trying her best to comfort him. Hours and paperwork had passed. I went to check on the two and was greeted with a far more pleasant sight than before. The two were getting along nicely. I entered the room and introduced myself to the child Pokemon now officially in my care.

He allowed me to pet him! He hasn't even known me for 5 minutes and he's letting me pet him! Too weak, was written on the report. Too weak my ass. Some people really don't deserve the love they get from Pokemon! Let alone the loyalty from this one.

"Hey lad. How'd ya fancy something to eat?"

My offer of food was met with enthusiasm from both young knights.

"Alright! Let's get the pair of ya fed!"

[firespirited]

Finally got to the Doctor, turns out she's been dealing with a family emergency all December (no she's not a trauma dumper, I'm the type who asks... and listens for 40 minutes because, well, clearly she hasn't been asked by many and needed to vent about bureaucracy and paperwork and difficult family members)

So that explains why she's been technically Not on holiday but also Not available.

Gonna do stool sample number three!!! *sarcastic confetti and noisemakers* with very careful wording and hope the lab don't mess up again along with a blood test for another potential GI tract hijacker.

If that falls through, we have to find out why malabsorbtion is happening with tubes that go down and up my tubes à moi. Probably 'up' given the severe daily pains in the lower intestines.

I'm terrified of intestinal cramping during a colonoscopy causing a tear in the guts and being one of the fatal 1% but have a plan to inform everyone and sharpie warnings on my arms if it ever comes to that exam. Yes, that's getting way ahead of ourselves: Adhd brain and medical trauma means I had 5-10 brain tabs open on next step risks and pitfalls within a second of her saying the word specialist.

I forgot to inform her that I've been eating leafy greens, iron supplements and cheap chicken bits to fight the anemia so if it's not as bad as expected it's because I'm horfing down whatever iron I can get ... my bp was below nine during the appointment, could barely stay on track.

Guess I'll shoot her an email after my blood test. Might need to confirm if she expected me to auto up my bp meds without asking permission (I've been living in, like, zombie mode because that hadn't occurred to me)

So she's back, we have another option to explore, she might medicate the symptoms of malabsorbtion if it looks ugly on the tests. Progress? I think? Hope at least.

Getting 'we didn't test for candida' on the second, now more clearly marked, candida test on the 26th of December was a massive blow as I'd stupidly staked so much hope on that test. 'We will neither confirm nor deny we did a candida test because we're being pedantic about precise precriptions' over the phone a few days later wasn't reassuring either. And my dr had been on call but not replying to phone or email since early dec which was concerning.

______________

For your edutainment: here's how to do a stool sample.

If the pot is nice and big like it could contain two glasses of orange juice, you're in luck you can probably go right in it. Most are smaller single OJ if not single yoghurt plastic pots.

So first, pee. Very important step, you may pee later but at least it's less mess. Get some cling film (saran wrap) and carry a cut sheet to the loo (rather than bringing a kitchen item into your toilet room) , drape it over the back 3/4 of your toilet under the seat so there's a little poo catcher nook and make sure its well attached on both sides.

Do your poo, stuff toilet paper between your cheeks, open the pot. Get up, turn around, use the poo pot to gather a sample, close pot with loo paper. Pull down cling film at an angle and wash cling film in flush water, place it in a doggie poop bag to go in the trash.

Wipe bottom, flush again.

Wash outside of stool pot carefully, wash your hands carefully. Put stool pot in an opaque marked bag in the fridge far from food, more towards closed sauces until someone with a car can drop it off. Copro Culture takes 3 days, if you have internet access to results you could have them then.

Very important to remember : unless you have a blessèd routine involving a morning coffee and precise timing. This could take several attempts and several cling film sheets. Do not get up too fast to grab that pot if you have POTS or feel in any way drained - I promise it can wait, nearly passing out face first over a toilet with a film poop ledge is not great. Still better than most people's uninformed attempt at collecting a normal sized poo in the undersized pot!

In the same way, pee samples are 'pass under the stream briefly' not sample the whole pee. Entire pee samples come with a bottle sized pot: ask for two, we hydrate better than previous generations.

[foaming-sea]

Different people have different thought patterns. This is how I imagine some of them, but I need help/advice.

Person 1: Dark, too dark, need to get out of here, get out get out get out help me no no no don't think like that i'm scared no one will ever find me caves are dumb and scary why why why am i even here i'm dying too wet too damp i'm drowning out of water no no no no no no no…

Person 2: So cool! I love these trees! Blue and yellow birds, what are they called again? I don't remember. I'll look at that bird book again when I get home. SO PRETTY! Bluest sky ever seen, marshmallow clouds. I wonder what's for lunch. I can't believe I've never noticed how much clover there is here before. I'm excited! I'm coming back tomorrow!

Person 3: ...only four stones... ...lucky they're gone or I'd make them leave... ...annoying idiots... ...who cares, anyway, no one knows... ...if they make me eat baloney one more time I will throw up in their faces... ...ha ha ha the look on their faces is priceless... ...the nerve... ...they'll be sorry... ...dumb rooster I'll wring it's neck if it crows one more time... ...no more plates... ...that guy looks ridiculous…

Person 4: This papaya was boring. Just kind of boring all the way through. Normally I like papayas, but this one was boring. Maybe I'll eat another one after this one. But what if that one is boring too? I need a nap. Naps are nice. I'd feel better after a nap. I wouldn't be so sleepy. Naps aren't complicated. Maybe I'll eat another papaya and then take a nap. Maybe this time it won't be boring. I don't want another boring papaya. Maybe it's sweet. I hope it's sweet.

Person 5: That guy looks shy. I glanced at the map earlier, and it said that the trains go northeast. Why is that bird flying so fast? Something must have scared it. I hope the people here like me. Heavy, humid air, it'll rain soon. Hot, itchy. That building needs a new paint job. Person in front of me looks scared, glancing around and trying to look smaller than she is. Up to something? Or shy? Just nervous? Wonder who she is. Blue raincoat, kinda pretty. I like blue. That store over there, I'd better remember that for later. I'm hungry. Pizza place over there, tacos three streets over, or I could go to the grocery store and cook later. I've got 15 dollars to spend. Wet, did it rain earlier? Apartment Stinton Rd, 386. Should be close. Getting nearer to that part of town. Maybe I could see if they have good clothes at the thrift shop, I kinda need some. I only have two outfits, and I need to wash them both. I wish mosquitoes were extinct. Kid looks tired. Nap time? Somebody dropped a penny. Map said go left from Cranberry, I think that's the next street over. I miss home. Too bad, shush, don't think about it, wasn't my fault. If I start crying, I am a baby, a silly baby. I can handle it. Shush. Dark in a couple hours. Pretty trees, they painted it with limestone to keep the bugs from burrowing in it. I wonder if bugs are a problem here. I hope there aren't any termites. Termites are a nuisance. If that person says one more rude word they will be written across his face in blood. Oof, no, don't think like that. I have no right to think that, if I'm the kind of person to want to hurt someone. I should get sandwich stuff, and maybe treat myself to a candy bar. No, I don't deserve a candy bar. There are too many people here. I wonder what it feels like to be a plant trying to grow in a sidewalk crack. Hard enough, and then some dummy steps on you quite frequently. Gotta check my phone when I get home. I hope the plumbing works at the apartment. I want a shower. Avocados a dollar a bag, ok that's worth it. Must be close to expiration. I'll get tomatoes and chips and lemons and make guacamole. Maybe the apartment will have a fridge. Glad this stuff isn't expensive.

Keep in mind that person 5 is thinking all this in the same amount of time as person 4.

Person 6: When I get home, I’m going to write down those ideas. I have to. The sunrise is so pretty. I remember that poem from Robert Frost. Nothing gold can stay. That one. That one has a lot of meaning. I remember reading The Outsiders a while ago. It’s powerful. I’d like to write that powerfully one day. Maybe I could sketch a leaf on the top of the page. I should have brought my notebook. Maybe I could write about a squirrel. They’re so energetic, and fun. Smart, too. Like a hummingbird. Flashes of color, hovering almost like they don’t need wings to fly. How do they hover so steadily while flapping so fast? I could paint one. Bright blues, purple and orange/yellow feathers. Maybe a squirrel in the background.

Person 7: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Person 8: No more, no more, no more. Think of nothing, nothing at all. Go blank. No, calm down. Calm down. Not my fault, no freaking out, just calm down. I got nothing to say, nothing to say, nothing. Time to go away, away, no more of this. No reason, they’re not mad. Look calm, calm, look okay. Just go blank. Nothing, empty, please, just nothing. No reminders. Just hush. Gotta do your math. Math. Focus on math. 2X times -7, gotta know that. 2X times -7. 2X times seven. Fourteen, now make it negative. No, focus. -14X. Focus. Nothing else.

Person 9: ....................................................I kind of have a headache..........................................................I'm tired......................................................hmm, I wonder if I should do something with my life......................................................but what... I don't know what to do........ I'm kinda hungry.......... *spends 45 minutes figuring out what to eat........ spends another 2 hours making it....... why don't I feel good...................................................maybe I'm hungry!......... spends another hour making and prepping food..............................................I'm sad.......................maybe I should do something with my life............................ *finally gets up and does something... this is awesome! The sky is beautiful, I love the way that the clouds frame the sun.... that tree is so elegant... ooh, flowers! Do they smell good? Yes! It's incredible that all of this was made for us, I take it for granted too often...... one hour later................................................. why don't I feel good?............ Maybe I'm hungry?.......................

I'm not sure what you need help with. But this definitely how people think. Different people have different thought patterns. then again, one single person have different thought patterns too. Depends on the situation they are. For an example, I picture my thought pattern as similar to person 5. Sometimes it's like person 6 too, that usually happens when I'm in writing mood. When I'm very panicked over something it's like person 8. So I'd say the way you are imagining these thought patterns are very valid. If you need help or like me to discuss somethings specific about these thought patterns then let me know. This was interesting to read through.

[bbyannabeth]

If you’re feeling up to it you should write percys pov from the neighbors AU because I’m dying to know if he’s actually cool or just good at playing off his nerves around a pretty girl

last part

percy liked his new neighbors well enough, but when piper had peeked her head around to call them out for hiding in the kitchen, he did not like her in that moment. he had been enjoying talking to annabeth alone a lot more than he should've. he'd come over to meet their friends and get to know a few more people in the city, but he would've been content talking to her the whole night.

luckily, she didn't stray too far as they walked into the living room. he followed her and piper over to a small group of people. "percy, this is jason, reyna, and frank," annabeth explained, pointing to each of them respectively. "this is our neighbor, percy."

they were all polite, offering kind smiles and making small talk - mainly asking why he'd chosen to move to new york, what he did for work, etc. even as he spoke to them, percy felt annabeth's eyes on him as she and piper whispered to each other. his smile grew a little when he glanced over at her and saw her eyes flick away immediately. he was trying not to be too cocky, but it was hard when she was so obviously attracted to him.

and percy wasn't normally cocky, but annabeth was so damn transparent. the first two times they'd met, she'd been stumbling over her sentences and her eyes had drifted to his muscles more times than he could count. it gave him a stupid amount of confidence.

piper stayed with those friends as annabeth led him to the other group of people by the dining table. "this is leo, rachel, thalia, and grover," she said, her arm brushing his lightly. "guys, this is our new neighbor, percy."

the same thing - polite smiles and small talk, although this time annabeth wasn't whispering to her roommate, she was included in the conversation. she was so different tonight than he'd seen her before. she was more confident and outspoken. she smiled and laughed a lot more, which percy already loved seeing. whether that be because of the atmosphere or the drink in her hand, he wasn't sure but he was enjoying it all the same.

the two groups in the room joined together, then broke off in smaller groups again, before the whole thing repeated again. everyone moved around to talk to different people, yet annabeth stayed by his side the whole time. he kept wanting to pull her away and hideout in the kitchen again. he didn't see an opportunity to, but it seemed she was one step ahead of him.

"i'm going to get another drink. do you want something?" she asked, smiling up at him.

"yeah, i'll come with you actually," he replied, watching her smile grow. she nodded and he followed her towards the kitchen. on the way, he caught piper's eye and she gave them a sly smile before returning to her conversation with reyna.

annabeth took a pitcher from the fridge, setting it on the counter before pushing the door further open. "help yourself to anything you'd like," she told him, pouring more of the drink into her cup. he took another can of coke, leaning against the counter and watching her as she put the pitcher back in the fridge. she shut the door, picked up her drink, and looked up at him, seemingly unfazed by the way he was staring shamelessly.

"can i ask you something?" he asked, taking a little leap of faith - one he was pretty sure was going to turn out well.

her eyes sparkled. "yeah, of course."

"could i get your number?" he asked, taking a step closer. "you know, in case i'm ever in a dire situation and am in need of a cute neighbor to come rescue me."

annabeth bit her lip in a failed attempt to hide her smile, but it broke through anyways. she reached back and pulled her phone from her pocket. "well, i'd hate to be a bad neighbor in the event you need rescuing," she said. she opened her screen to a new contact and handed it over. he punched in his information, and when he gave it back, her smile was wide and unrestrained on her face. breathtaking.

"that better not be a fake number," she said, putting her phone away after presumably typing out a quick message to him to send him her number. "i know where you live."

he laughed, shaking his head. "it's not," he promised. as if he would miss out on the opportunity to give her his number. "who else would i call in my dire situation?"

next part

[sevendeadlymorons]

Good noon! (Or morning/night) Hope you're doing well! I'd like to ask if you could do the one that was similar with "Brothers don't like MC?" But with the Dateables? 🙏👀 If not though! Then that's perfectly fine! Thank you reading my fair human person<3 pls take care!

Ok this was apparently really popular so here’s another with the lovely Dateables~

Writing Diavolo and Simeon was so hard, and I couldn’t even figure out how to write Luke so uhh I gave up heh sorry...

Brothers + Dateables Just Can’t Seem to Like MC

WARNING: Angst // Possible Emotional Abuse

—————————————

Lucifer

You could never understand the way he looks at you, or rather, how he ignores you after looking at you

His eyes are filled with hatred and you couldn’t understand why, you did nothing wrong yet he looked at you like you were a nuisance and a pain to be around

The way he said your name was cold and harsh and it reminded you of the way you were treated back in the human world, with so little respect, as if you were smaller and more insignificant than him

But little did you know, he hated you for everything you did. Your humour, your manners, the way you followed him around, expecting him to babysit you when he’s already pissed off with his brothers to begin with

He hates the way you loiter around him, waiting for a moment to talk to him only to be rejected and painfully ignored. He always enjoys watching your smile turn into a frown and your eyes slowly begin to water as you without hesitation turn to flee away from him

It tears you up inside, leaves your heart aching and you find yourself breaking down, tears flooding down your face as his cruel words repeat in your head

You’ve always wished that someone in any of these worlds would ever care about a human like you, but perhaps that wish may never come true

Mammon

You knew being around him annoyed him, why wouldn’t it? He was assigned to look after you; stripped of his freedom and privacy to be your new babysitter

You saw the way he looked at you in disgust, tears forming in your eyes as he throws insult after insult at you, not stopping when tears were flooding down your face after being called useless for the hundredth time

You wished he’d treat you nicer but you knew he only saw you as a weak human who’ll eventually be eaten by some lower demon which would rid him of you and his babysitting duties

Why must you always make life difficult for him, why should he deal with your fuck-ups? He wishes you disappeared, honestly

He can’t find a moment of peace with you around, constantly being called to save you from demons or to help you after getting lost, it’s such a hassle

It’s so hard to be there by his side all the time, constantly taking all the abuse he throws at you and being called sensitive when you break down in front of him

Your only wish is to make friends here. You thought maybe they’d care about you here, but perhaps life isn’t always that easy

Leviathan

He would never hold back when it came to you, worse than Mammon when it came to insulting you as you bite your lip to stop it from quivering

You were so insignificant to him and he let you know that, just a stupid normie who enjoyed getting in his way and pissing him off with your humour and your constantly loud personality

He ignores you, pushing you away and rejecting all conversations, and when he wasn’t doing that, he was insulting you until you felt it deep in your heart, your stomach sinking as you realise the Devildom will be no different from the human world

You knew your sadness irritated him as his brow furrowed and his lips crease into a grimace at how pathetic you looked stood in front of a powerful demon like him

It took all of him to not get physical with you as he’s not stupid enough to make Lucifer punish him for it, but in his head, he wants you gone

You never knew what you did wrong with Levi; you shared multiple interests with him yet he would continue to scoff and tease you and brush you off, locking himself back in his room

You sit alone at night in floods of tears, no one to talk to as you realise just how alone you are here and just how desperate you were for someone, anyone to like you

Satan

Nothing you said got his attention, well, not in a positive way anyway

You were a nuisance, he said it himself as he grabs your face, threatening you for the god knows how many times this week

He hates the way you were always around him, following him like some kind of dog and asking him meaningless questions that he had no interest in answering. You would him up, made him so angry sometimes that he wish you would just disappear. He didn’t care where to, as long as you weren’t in his sight

He loves to see you cry after telling you exactly how he feels about you and how every single one of his brothers and friends feel about you. You were nothing to him and you never will be

You’re brainless and clumsy and he doubts you’ll survive down here, not with how naive you were

You wanted so badly to befriend him, or at least for him to see you as a worthy person. You had enough shit thrown at you in the human world and all you wanted was a friend, someone to talk to and laugh with

You’ll forever have to remember that he does not care about you and you’ll forever be stuck alone

Asmodeus

Straight away, Asmo took a disliking to you, grimacing and inching away from you whenever you were near him, like a disease

Every time you tried talking to him, he wouldn’t even let you finish a sentence as he walks away, laughing at your pathetic excuse of a conversation along the way

He made your life Hell as he threw backhanded insults at you, making you feel worse than you already did and causing you to feel disgusting and unwanted

The avatar of Lust didn’t even want you, so you always wondered who ever would

In truth, he hated you for no particular reason. He just saw you as weaker than him and took advantage of that, making you feel worse and worse every day until you eventually decided to leave him alone, as he truly couldn’t stand your face nor your plain personality

You always end up alone in your room after a day of torment, tears flooding down your face as you stare at an empty screen, feeling so alone and unwanted

You wish he had a reason to hate you, you’d change yourself so he’d actually like you then. You just wanted someone to talk to and someone to love you, but perhaps you were just meant to be alone

Beelzebub

He hated how you were so curious, and so small compared to him. Just another human that he could easily devour in seconds

His eyes were always so dull when he looked at you. So emotionless and unbothered by your presence. And it hurt because they immediately lit up when his brothers walked in. Why couldn’t he look at you like that...?

He’d steal your food, snarling at you when you protest and terrifying you if you even went close to his food in the fridge. You knew he had it in for you and you just wish he didn’t

He saw you as lower than him, enjoying the tears that formed in your eyes when he would insult you and call you names, pushing you to limits that would soon break your heart

Some days he would ignore you and those normally hurt the most as you were forced to walk behind him and Belphie whilst they were laughing and having fun, leaving you behind like you weren’t even there

Nothing you could say could ever make him like you and you slowly began to accept that as you distanced yourself, allowing him to take your food and be his punching bag in a hope that maybe he’ll start to like you...

He was always so nice to everybody but you, just like everybody in the human world and you were so sick of it, so sick of the pain and the tears. You just wanted a friend in this dark, scary place

Belphegor

Seeing you just made him hate humans harder as he realised just how pathetic and annoying they all were

He never smiled nor made proper eye contact when you were around, all you got was a snarl, the cold shoulder and an occasional threat when he’s in a particularly bad mood

He reminds you how easily he could kill you; wrap his hands round your neck and suffocate you again like before. He likes to see the terrified look on your face as you back away from him

You were so scared of him, but you just wanted to befriend him because you felt alone and you wanted someone to reassure you that you’d be safe by their side, but he never let you feel that way, not even for a second

You couldn’t go near him whilst he slept without almost being injured and you also couldn’t be near him whilst he was awake because he’d insult you and make you feel sick to your stomach, feeling tears well up quickly

You break down, cradling your knees to your chest as you sob alone in a dark unfamiliar room with no one to turn to

Sometimes you wonder if you’d be better off actually dying by his hands as it’s all the same, wherever you go, everybody around you torments you and makes you feel awful

Diavolo

He loves everyone around him but when it came to you, he wishes he’d never even thought of the exchange program to begin with

You were obnoxious and so different to what he expected any normal human to be like

He kept his composure and mannerisms as royalty but he made it his job to ignore you and avoid you as often as he could

He knew it looked unprofessional on his side but he didn’t care as he continued to dodge you and skip past your questions in group meetings, giving you the cold shoulder when he saw you at RAD or in the castle when you visited

When he had to talk to you, the first thing you noticed was his dull, unentertained eyes and his lack of a cheery smile that he normally showed around Lucifer and his brothers. It made you feel so upset and like you were being treated differently

You thought maybe he would like you, but as the days passed and he kept on avoiding you and scowling at you when you occasionally bump into him, you knew it wouldn’t happen

He was the one who forced you to come here and you couldn’t even leave because who was there to go home to...

Barbatos

The Butler was the first person you saw, and he was also the first person to scowl at you in the Devildom

He normally had a serious look on his face, but when he sees you, it’s like his whole personality changes and he’s suddenly rude and harsh

You did nothing to him, not said one word, but it’s like he held something against you and it broke you. He didn’t even give you a chance and you could do nothing about it

You tried to befriend him because you wanted to so badly. Walking with him when he had free time and asking him questions to start conversation but nothing seemed to work, he just kept ignoring you

He wouldn’t insult you though, he wouldn’t even speak and that made it hurt even more as he stared you down with those dull eyes of his, forever judging you for absolutely nothing

You thought maybe assisting him around the castle would make him like you: cleaning up, helping cook. Just basic things that could make his life easier. But nothing worked, and he just left you to stand alone, heartbroken

You felt overwhelmingly lonely with no one to tell you how to survive this place or how everything worked. You realised you had a place nowhere in this world and that stung you hard as you felt tears finally drip down your cheeks

Simeon

You thought maybe an angel would be your friend, but as you watched him take one look at you and leave, your hope crumbled and your heart sank to your stomach

He walked past you every day, saying nothing as you waved at him to say hello, moving away from you so you didn’t touch him

He knew when he saw a human not worthy of his time. But he wasn’t going to insult you, he’ll spare you that heartache at least. He didn’t have any reason to dislike you, he just didn’t want to involve himself with someone like you. Someone so visibly lonely

Some days he’ll give you a pitied smile and a wave and watch your face light up. He honestly felt sorry for you, so lost in this new world, but he didn’t have the time to babysit a human like you

You’d follow him around, desperate to get his attention but you’d never actually get it. You’d get an excuse to not be there. All the time

You can’t help but cry, breaking down at the thought of being stuck here alone. Even an angel doesn’t like you, so nobody ever will

It’s always been this way though. People would avoid you and make excuses to not hang around you, everybody was the same; you felt foolish to believe anybody would ever see something in you

Solomon

When he heard another human would be here, he never expected someone like you

His first interaction with you was so clearly half arsed as he introduced himself, giving you that little bit of hope that maybe finally you’d found a possible friend only for him to never speak to you again after that

It broke your heart how nobody gave you a chance and just saw you as a weak human who needs demons to fend for them in this terrifying world

He may’ve pitied you though, seeing such a lost human like yourself made him remember how he used to be when he first entered the Devildom. But unlike you, he wasn’t useless

You tried to talk to him but you always got ignored or given a back handed insulted that would give you memories to when you were little in the human world

You thought being a human he’d understand how you may feel and you two may get along, but his eyes were always unbothered and he never smiled at you like he did around the brothers or the angels

Never in your life have you felt more ignored by your own kind and you lie alone in bed, thinking about all the shit he says to you over and over again and how little your importance is in all 3 worlds

Part 1 is here

[amintyworld]

fuck i didn't think this through i gotta get a new ao3 account for it before i can post it uh uh uh i am copy pasting the doc and praying

Ranboo Beloved was going to pass out.

It had been a VERY long evening at the gas station he worked at, and there were still another two hours left until he could go home. Groan. Taking the night shift truly was hell. He mumbled something about minimum wage groggily and grabbed a couple sodas to stuff in the fridge. As he stepped towards the back, he heard a sound from one of the aisles.

‘BANG!’

Ranboo jolted, then flipped around and ducked behind the aisle, dropping the sodas in his panic.

‘It's okay. I’m fine. I probably won’t die. Oh no what if I die. God, if I die, please look after Enderch-‘

“OI! BITCH! LITTLE HELP, HERE?”

He turned slowly into the area, making sure to grab a broom in case he needed self defense, only to see a boy, around his age, blond and covered head to toe in dirt, clutching an alarming amount of chips. “Grab a couple of these, would you.. What’s your name?”

“Oh! It’s.. um.. Ranboo!”

“Cool, now Ranboob, help me out with these crisps, would you?”

“That’s uh, not my name. Do you just want a cart?”

“NO! CARTS ARE FOR THE WEAK !! AND I AM A BIG MAN, I AM SIMPLY TOO POWERFUL FOR WEAK SHIT.”

“I- uh- yeah. Alright. Lemme just grab these and take em to the register..”

“No, Ranboob, you’re a fool. A fool and a coward and morally wrong. See, why would I buy them when I could do this magical little thing called stealing?”

“WHAT?? YOU CAN'T DO THAT,”

The kid (damn, Ranboo still needed to ask for his name) narrowed his eyes. “What, are you a pussy?”

“N- I’m not.. that, but I work here, so I can’t really let you steal.”

Realizing what this meant, the boy dropped the chips, but seemed to be sizing Ranboo up. He paused, then let out a sigh, reluctantly putting a few more back.

Ranboo took a look at the blonde. A real look, not just to be polite. He realized that his shirt was practically swallowing him whole, and his frame was alarmingly bony. Even his raggedy beanie looked too big on him. His blue eyes looked tired, like he hadn't slept in a week. Hmm. Ranboo relinquished the broom and stood up.

“What’s your name?” He asked, grabbing one of the chip packs back from the shelf.

“Tommy Careful Danger Kraken Detective Innit. But you can call me sir.

“What if I called you Tommy?”

“Hmm, tolerable.." the boy said with a half smile. He hopped off the ground where he was. "Alright, see you later, Boob Boy.”

“Boob- I. Okay. Alright-“

As he stuttered, the blonde (Tommy!) started to head out the front. As he passed the cash register, Ranboo hesitated.

“Wait!”

Tommy turned around to face him.

“Whatdayaneed?”

“Do you.. do you want a slushie? On the house?”

—————————

Ranboo Beloved wasn't doing too bad.

It had been a few weeks since that night. He had gotten a raise for ‘preventing’ a shoplifting (little did his manager know), and he’d found a friend in Tommy. He supposed it was his first real one, since toddlers who were related to him didn’t really count. Sorry, Micheal. Speaking of said friend, he was due for a visit. It was about the time of night that he normally dropped by for a free slushie and a fun conversation.

The bell rang from the door across from him. Right on time.

“Tommy! Hey! The usual?”

Tommy entered with grandeur, but seemed to be holding the soor for someone.

"Not yet, big man. I’ve got someone I want you to meet! Tubbo, c’mon, would you? We don’t have all night here,” he yelled, seemingly giving up on holding the door and walking to the register. He grabbed a bar stool to sit on.

As he said it, Ranboo saw someone poke their head out from the door. It seemed to be a kid a bit shorter than Tommy, with choppy bangs that covered his eyes and ears. He slid around the entrance and perched on the stool right before Tommy could sit down.

“You son of a bitch!” Tubbo gave him a shit eating grin in response. “Ranboo, the complete ass right here is Tubbo, he wouldn’t know good manners if they hit him in the face,”

“Says the one who tried to rob my store the first time we met,” Ranboo quipped, quirking an eyebrow up at the blonde.

Tommy shot him a glare, but he was holding back a smile as he replied, “Listen, you bastard, it’s not my fault you have a very robbable store,”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“Exactly what I said, your store is simply weak and easily robbed by big strong men such as myself,”

“Right, which is why I caught you and you immediately gave up,”

“I… you know, you haven’t introduced yourself to Tubbo-“

Ranboo smirked, knowing that he had won. “Hi Tubbo, I’m Ranboo,” he greeted, holding out a hand for the kid to shake.

Tubbo tilted his head at the hand being held up, and promptly chomped down with surprisingly sharp teeth.

“HOLY SH- SHOOT, OW?! DUDE!” Ranboo exclaimed, jerking his now bleeding hand back behind the counter.

“Tubbo, c’mon man, I thought we went over this..” Tommy sighed, glancing at the unhinged boy in question with exasperation. He shrugged in response, seeming to be guilty, but made no move to apologize or help Ranboo grab bandages.

Tommy scratched the back of his neck, looking sheepish. “Soooo, uh, how’s about those slushies, Big R?”

Ranboo sighed. Maybe he should’ve just let Tommy shoplift.

After wrapping his hand up, he grabbed two cups and filled one with Tommy’s usual: half cherry, half coke. When he got to the second, he spun around. “Hey Tubbo, what flavor do you want?’’

Tubbo looked caught off guard at being addressed. “..Surprise me.”

Ranboo grinned. He grabbed the cup, and filled it with his personal favorite: alternating layers of strawberry and lemon-lime. Then he bent over the counter and grabbed the secret ingredient in any good slushie, the tiny umbrella. He gingerly placed it, then popped straws in both of the drinks.

When he slid them to the boys, Tommy squinted at Tubbo’s. “How come Tubbo gets an umbrella? You never gave me one..”

"You never asked!" Ranboo teased, but he still grabbed another and plopped it in the icy mixture, much to the blonde's delight.

They chatted about whatever came to mind, with Tubbo occasionally adding a few words. (He seemed especially interested in hacking and explosions. Concerning, but Ranboo wasn't about to question it.)

After about an hour of goofing off, Tommy and Tubbo decided to say their goodbyes. Ranboo threw their now empty cups into the trash behind him, and they stood up, tidying the area and fixing the barstools. Tommy was the first to speak.

"See you later, Boob Boy! I'd thank you for the slushies, but it's you who should be grateful that you've gotten to spend the evening in my presence,"

Ranboo rolled his eyes, glad that he could tell when Tommy was just being dramatic. He really was grateful under all the fanfare. Probably.

"Yeah yeah, sure. Now get out of here before I have to report a slushie theft. It was nice meeting you, Tubbo."

Tubbo smiled at him, a real smile that didn't make Ranboo scared he was about to be bitten again, and headed out the door with Tommy following behind.

As they left, Ranboo realized that he still had another hour of his shift, and he hadn't even started with the sweeping. Crap.

—————————

"Tubbo, seriously! You could have blown our whole cover!"

Tommy was practically running to keep up with the smaller boy. After an excessively boring bus ride and a mile long hike, they had finally entered the forest. Now, they could talk about things that actually mattered without being seen.

"C'mon bossman, it was funny. Plus, what's the Ranboo guy gonna do? If he's really like you said, then we'll be fine,"

"I know, but STILL! You can't just go around biting people. What if someone else had come in?"

"Alright, alright, I hear you. I'll be more careful next time. How much longer do you wanna keep up the act?"

Tommy let out a sigh. "Not much longer. I think this is it, I really do. Ranboo's a good person, he can help us,"

"If you're sure."

Tommy simply smiled, ever so slightly. He was sure. He hadn't been sure about a human in a very long time, not since.. him. Hopefully Ranboo would be better. No, he would definitely be better. Yeah. For sure.

He didn't have any longer to ponder, though, since they had arrived.

Tubbo glanced back at him. "You ready?"

"Yeah."

With that, the two of them launched off the mossy ground and into the air, with shimmery wings sprouting from their backs. Finally. It was time to go home.

"I do have to admit, though, he makes a pretty good slushie. I liked the lemon lime."

-

it's not the best but like i tried and ill probably do more for it, im excited for when wilbur shows up

AWWWE I love it!!!!

Poor Ranboo has no idea what’s coming kekw-

Also the lil Failed affectionate nip I-

🥺

[properweirdparker]

Someone Cool (Peter Parker x Fem!Reader)

a/n: aight this is my first fic so it's gonna be booty butt cheek no doubt. let me know what you think and I do take constructive criticism *sobbing intensifies*. but lemme know if you wanna be tagged for future fics n shit. The song in this fic is called fallingforyou by The 1975 which you can listen to here:

Summary: The daily life of Peter Parker is not as easy as it seems. With being a part time hero and part time awkward nerd trying to finish his last year of high school, he can't help but feel as if the world is weighing down on him. As if he is expected to be on top of things in his double life. Luckily he has someone who helps as a distraction from his chaotic life and reminds him he is more than the suit and powers.

Peter couldn't help but feel as if he was gonna explode. There was no way anyone could take on the responsibilities he had without going insane, and Peter was pretty sure he was about to lose it - assuming he hasn't already. Not only does he have a physics test at the end of the week that he did not begin to study for yet, he also needs to stay out longer than his usual hours in the night to patrol the area. The latter of the two leaves him feeling exhausted to even study for the former.

Lately, Peter has been feeling as if he has a heavy weight on his shoulders wherever he goes. As Spider-Man, he is expected to always be there whenever he was needed. It was a service he should never turn away from, not that he ever would, but he can't help but feel that being Spider-Man is starting to become a huge burden on his part. He feels horrible for thinking that since there are people out there that really needed his help, but this job has been taking away from his normal life as Peter Parker. Nevertheless he keeps those thoughts to himself, not wanting to come off as selfish.

Despite the chaos he attracts being Spider-Man and the add on stress he accumulates from trying to keep up with his normal life, Peter always knows who exactly to turn to whenever it gets too much for him. His best friend Y/n Y/l/n, who he met at the start of their freshman year, was always able to take his mind off from reality and just allow him to exist peacefully. Of course she didn't know he was Spider-Man at first but eventually she found out - Peter isn't exactly a master of subterfuge - and she was completely understanding as too why he kept it a secret.

What Peter loved most about his friendship with Y/n is that she leaves him alone without actually leaving him. She never strings up a conversation about anything to do with him being Spider-Man or about different assignments he forgot to finish for various classes. He appreciates it, he appreciates her for it. She was just what he needed, a distraction from everything.

Y/n would always strike up conversations about different things whenever Peter comes to her. If he is tired from his patroling duties and needs to rest a bit, he swings by Y/n's house and she tells him about this new book she is reading that has a character with the same name as him but differs in personality. If he is upset because a teacher of his randomly gives out a pop quiz for which he, well, no one was prepared for, Peter would find Y/n after school so he could walk her home all the while she brings up the topic of alien existence and how she feels it is selfish of people to think we are the only living creatures in the galaxy. He would have to introduce her to Thor one day, they'd hit it off immediately.

"Like are you kidding me? There is more to all of this and you have the nerve to say I'll believe it when I see it!? Imbeciles!!" She huffs as Peter laughs at her outburst, seeming to have forgotten why he was so upset in the first place.

Or if he just wants to hang out with someone he finds cool Peter would invite Y/n over to his house and she would talk about the two ladybugs that landed on her right shoulder earlier that day. Trying to figure out what it could mean and she would ask Peter what he thinks off it, genuinely wanting to hear his thoughts on this - another thing he loved about their friendship.

All these things are a part of the many reasons as to why he started to gain feelings for the y/h/c haired girl. She is so absorbed in knowing he is more than just Spider-Man. She reminds him that he is not the center of the world just because he saved it a couple times and he never chose to be either. To Y/n he was just Pete, her kind friend who helps to carry her many books she borrows from the library home so she won't struggle with it. Her amazing friend who she always asks for his input on certain things so she can have more perspective. He never found her irritating or weird whenever she would ramble on about anything she deemed interesting and she appreciated that. For Peter she was just Y/n, the girl that needs him to hold her things from time to time as she tells him about the latest updates on the many conspiracy theories she finds interesting. He wanted her to be more than just what they are to each other though he didn't know if she felt the same way at all.

It took Peter a while to come to terms with the fact that he had feelings for Y/n. It started off with him noticing small little details about the girl like the little strands of hair that were left out when she would put her hair up in a bun or ponytail. Or whenever she would be doing anything like making a snack or doing other small things, she would make a little song out of it and sing it to herself while completing these tasks, which he found absolutely adorable. He caught her singing about making soup one time while she was putting said soup on the stove to heat up once, he really wished he had brought his phone with him so he could record it. Even smaller details he notices like how her eyes would sparkle a bit whenever she talked about her favorite books or movies. At first Peter mistaked all of this as just his admiration for the y/h/c haired girl but it never stopped with the observations.

Peter found himself missings his best friend's presence a lot. Even after only a few hours of seeing her, he wanted to be with her again and listen to her talk for hours on end. He didn't know why at first but he just blew it off as nothing.

As time went on, Peter knew he couldn't deny it any longer. He knew why he was feeling these things but he just didn't want to believe it because then it would change everything. If she didn't feel the same way then it would totally ruin their friendship, everything would just be awkward and he would not be able to go to her when things ever get hard for him because he would be too embarrassed. He didn't want to jeopordize their friendship so he kept his feelings to himself. Thinking it would be for the best because these feelings were only one sided. He couldn't be more wrong.

Y/n invited Peter over after school so they could study together for their upcoming physics test, god knows Peter absolutely needed it. His duties as Spider-Man barley left him any time to study at all. Luckily for him, Happy let him have a couple of days off to prepare for it, after much persuasion.

They were both sitting on her bed looking through their notes and quizzing each other from time to time. An hour had passed and Y/n, bored out of her mind, decides that they should take a little break.

"Alright I'm beat, lets take a break yeah?" She looks to Peter and he agrees.

"Yeah a break sounds good, I'll go get those cookies your mom made from the fridge. Be right back." He then got off her bed to go to the kitchen.

Y/n then decided to play some music so she connects her phone to her speaker and puts her music on shuffle. She smiles when fallingforyou by The 1975 starts playing and she softly sings along to it.

What time you coming home?

We started losing light

I'll never get it right

If you don't want me 'round

I'm so excited for the night

All we need's my bike

And your enormous house

Peter came back with the cookies and stopped by the doorway when he heard Y/n’s voice. He just stood there in awe while she sung softly with her eyes closed. He smiled and his heart swelled at the sight. He knew she liked to sing but he never really got to hear her voice until now. Peter honestly couldn't be more infatuated with her than in this moment.

Y/n opened her eyes when she felt a presence and blushed when she saw Peter standing by the door smiling at her.

"Your voice is beautiful Y/n." Peter walked towards the bed and placed the cookies down then looked at the her and smiled when he saw her blush more.

"Thanks Pete." She bashfully smiled back and they stared at each other for a bit until she finally worked up the courage to say this next thing.

"Um, do you wanna dance with me? I mean you don't have to but I just love this song and I've always wanted to dance to it but-"

Peter cut her off with a smile "I'd love to."

They both stood up and faced each other in the middle of the room. Y/n moved closer and placed her hands on Peter's shoulders and Peter hesitantly put his hands on her waist. They then started to sway as the music softly played in the background.

Don't you see me I

I think I'm falling, I'm fallingforyou

And don't you need me I

I think I'm falling, I'm fallingforyou

And on this night

And in this light

I think I'm falling, I'm fallingforyou

And maybe you will change your mind

Y/n moved closer to lean her head on Peter's chest and he hoped that she wouldn't notice how fast his heart was beating in that moment. He wanted to tell the girl how he felt about her so badly but he just didn't want to risk losing their friendship. She just made him feel so many things that he couldn't help but want more than this.

According to your heart

My place is not deliberate

The feeling of your arms

"I can hear the gears in your head turning rapidly Pete. Penny for your thoughts?" The girl on his mind chuckled and looked up at him smiling. God he loved her smile.

"It's-It's nothing I just-" he sighed and she tilted her head in confusion, waiting for him to finish.

I don't wanna be your friend

I wanna kiss your neck

Screw it he thought and leaned in until his lips connected with hers. Y/n's eyes widened for just a split second before she closed her eyes and kissed him back. Her hands tangling into his soft brown locks while his hands gripped her waist and pulled her closer.

They both pull back when air was needed and Y/n leaned her forehead against Peter's. They both were smiling at each other and the latter spoke up.

"I've been wanting to do that for the longest time you know." He chuckled softly and she giggled and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"Me too Peter." They both shared a laugh and with that they leaned in to kiss once more as the song was finishing it's course.

Don't you see me I

I think I'm falling, I'm fallingforyou

And don't you need me I

I think I'm falling, I'm fallingforyou

And on this night

And in this light

I think I'm falling, I'm fallingforyou

And maybe you will change your mind

[sachertortes]

Congrats on your milestone! Excited to follow you! I'd like to request Darcy/Bucky and who knows the number because of formatting but it's "we're always making stupid bets like 'bet you can't drink this whole bottle of BBQ sauce' but then you did and now you're sick and I feel really bad here let me look after you." Extra points for any of the other Avengers that show up! Thanks for taking prompts!

@itsnotokbutwereallright  Thank you

Prompt: “we’re always making stupid bets like ‘bet you can’t drink this whole bottle of BBQ sauce’ but then you did and now you’re sick and I feel really bad here let me look after you.“

Pairing: Bucky x Darcy

Rating: G

Notes: references to vomiting, description is very vague though.

The thing about Darcy was, she wasn’t ever going to save people from a burning building, or rescue an entire ferry full of passengers from alien explosives.

No, she decided to prove herself in smaller ways.

Darcy had silly contests going with the Avengers.

They didn’t mind during their off-time and she did end up feeling pretty good about herself when she could finish eating an entire Caramel Apple Pie before Steve did. (“Make a cheesecake next time,” Steve said amiably after he’d admitted defeat. “And I’ll definitely win.”)

Darcy knew that any contest with Bruce had to be handled with care. She was mulling over what to do when a she heard a tiny ‘mew’ by a trashcan outside the facility.

“Okay,” she said to a bemused Dr. Banner when she returned to the labs. “First person who the kitty chooses as their bestie wins.”

Over the next several days she made kissy noises at it, she called it ‘a pretty baby’, she tried giving it bits of cheese. Still, it did nothing but stare balefully back at her from behind the trashcan. Then one day she was headed out with a can of tuna when she saw that Bruce had beaten her to it. The small, incredibly fluffy grey tabby was rubbing itself along his leg. Bruce looked up at her and smiled.

So, Darcy lost that one technically, but she’d definitely have the image of Bruce with a kitten perched on his shoulder forever. From then on, Faraday the cat lived in Bruce’s quarters.

It was difficult to enter a contest with a billionaire genius but Pepper, once she got wind of what Darcy was up to, gave her an idea.

“I’ll give you both a shopping list, and you complete it,” Pepper told them, while driving to town.

“Alright, pumpkin,” Tony said smoothly. “Where do you want us to shop? Barney’s? Cartier? Tiffany’s?”

Darcy held back a whine. Those places were above her paygrade, literally.

But Pepper just smiled patiently, eyes twinkling. “Target,” she said, as she pulled into the parking lot. She handed them both a list. “First person to meet me back at the car with exactly everything on this list wins.”

Thirty minutes later, Darcy was sprinting through the parking lot (not exactly safe, but she was in it to win it), plastic shopping bags in each hand, to a smiling Pepper.

Tony was already there, grinning smugly at her.

Pepper checked their lists with the contents of their bags.

“Sorry, kid,” Tony told her, looking not at all sorry.

“Actually, I said ‘exactly everything on this list’,” Pepper informed him. “So while you were faster than Darcy, she has everything on the list.”

“What’d I miss??! Pens? Double-Stuf Oreos? I know I got the toilet paper, I nearly knocked down some guy to get it!”

“You’re not missing anything. In fact, you have too much. Tony,” Pepper said, reproachfully. “Why in the world did you buy ten decorative mason jars?”

“I couldn’t help it! The Target Dollar section is right there!” Tony despaired.

She was sprawled out on the common room couch, playing on her phone.

“Heard you bake pies,” came Barnes’ voice from behind her. She nearly jumped out of her skin. She turned to glare at him right in his rakish grin and pretty blue eyes.

“Ooh no you don’t. I am not entering anymore eating competitions with supersoldiers. That stomachache nearly killed me last time!”

He grinned. “Not a pie eatin’ contest, sweetheart. I want one.”

Darcy saw her opportunity immediately. The chance to triumph (however small and silly) over the Winter Solider? Hells yes.

“Yeah? You’ll have to bet me for it.”

“I know. I’ve heard about your little contests. When I beat you –“

“When?!”

“- at Mario Kart, I want a chocolate peanut butter pie,” Bucky said, sauntering away. He pointed a bionic index finger at her. “Don’t skimp on the peanut butter.”

“And what if I win?”

Barnes looked her up and down, and smirked. “I’m sure you’ll think of something.”

“Alright, Mario Kart! Barnes versus Lewis, let’s do this!” declared Sam, their judge. He rubbed his hands together and stated with authority, “Today’s challenge mode is…no Blue Shells.”

“Y’know…I think I want whipped cream with that pie,” Bucky said from beside her.

Darcy flexed her fingers before picking up the controller. “I am going to run you right off Rainbow Road,” she promised.

Minutes later, Darcy was cursing Bucky Barnes and his stupidly good aim with the Green Shells. She watched sadly as her Yoshi fell into the void of space.

“Aw, shit. I can’t believe a senior citizen beat you at Mario Kart,” Sam teased.

“Hey!” Bucky and Darcy exclaimed in unison.

She turned to Bucky. “Best two out of three?” she asked hopefully.

He smiled back. “Sure thing, doll.” He picked up his controller again.

“No, Barnes,” Darcy said. “I meant two out of three contests.”

When Bruce invited them to yoga, Darcy had her next idea.

“First person to fall on their asses, loses,” Darcy declared, but Bucky only laughed and agreed. They even shook on it.

They made their way through down dog, table top, and eagle pose. Darcy only barely managed to keep her eyes to herself when Bucky followed Bruce’s instructions into a side plank. There were muscles and rippling and god, when his shirt rode up she could see where his muscle dipped on his hips and continued down lower, lower to – yeah. She snapped herself out of it before she seriously hurt herself.

They were all nice and warmed up and slightly sweaty when Bruce told them face one another. Then Darcy concentrated on breathing and extending and arching her back into camel pose.

She let out a relieved moan. She spent hours sitting in uncomfortable office chairs and the stretch was so nice after a long day.

Suddenly, Bucky cleared his throat and scrambled up from the mat. “Um, I gotta…go –” he said, glancing around shiftily. He took his water bottle and picked up his towel.

“So…I win?” Darcy said, hopefully.

“Yeah. Yeah, doll, you win this one,” Bucky answered, his voice slightly rough and unsteady.

Bruce watched the door shut behind a rapidly retreating Winter Soldier. “This was a contest?”

“This looks…disgusting,” Bucky muttered. They were in his quarters (surprisingly homey, and not at all as uptight or neat-as-a-pin as she thought it would be), and between them on the kitchen counter were two tall glasses of barbecue sauce. Specifically, the Stubb’s Spicy BBQ Sauce that she brought over.

“That’s the point,” she said. “First person to finish the entire glass wins. All of it.”

Bucky shrugged. “Guess I’ve had worse.” He still gave her an uncertain look, though.

“Okayyyy…Go!”

They began to drink.

The second she brought the glass to her lips, Darcy knew it was a mistake.

First of all, there was the smell. Now, Stubb’s BBQ sauce was delicious, yes. And normally it smelled…nice. Barbecue-y. But that was when it was served with delicious meat. In a glass, on its own, the spicy/sweet/savory scent was not good.

Then, when it actually hit her tongue? The strange gloopy, syrupy texture and an entire mouthful of the sauce on its own was awful. She gulped down what she could (not much) then put down her glass.

Bucky was right. It was disgusting.

Bucky was also finished. Darcy looked at his empty glass in awe.

“Holy shit, you did it!” Her own glass still looked as full as it was before. It was an indisputable win on Bucky’s part.

“Sure did, Darce, and now you owe me a –” Bucky paused, a strange look coming over his face.

“Are you – “

“Oh, god,” Bucky grunted and strode quickly to the bathroom, the door slamming shut behind him.

Darcy followed and was about to ask if he needed anything when the sound of his pained groan came through the door. Then came the definite sounds of someone worshipping the porcelain god. She hadn’t heard anything like that since her sophomore year of college.

Darcy winced and moved away from the door. She decided to wait for him on the couch, maybe get an apology in before he kicked her out and told on her to the Captain.

Eventually, there was the sound of water running, then Bucky emerged from the bathroom, looking pale and drawn and smelling vaguely minty.

Darcy shot up from her seat. “Oh my god, are you okay?! I’m so so sorry, I shouldn’t have made you drink that –”

But Bucky only waved his hand distractedly and stretched himself over the couch. His eyes were closed and he was still making little grumbling noises.

Darcy sighed. In the kitchen, she got a bottle of water from the fridge and dampened a kitchen towel in the sink.

She draped the cloth over Bucky’s forehead and pressed the water into his hand. He sat up and drank, one hand on his forehead keeping the towel in place.

“Don’t even like barbecue sauce,” he groused after downing about half the bottle in one go.

“What?! Then why even take the bet?!”

Bucky rolled his eyes, but said nothing. He capped the bottle, placed it on the coffee table, then lay back down.

“Dude…”

He turned to look at her for a second before shutting his eyes again. “Because…I like spendin’ time with ya, Darce,”

“Bucky…” Darcy began.

Bucky hummed. “I like that,” he said softly. This time he was staring at her.

“Like what?”

“When you say my name. Usually you just call me ‘Barnes’.”

“Oh.” Darcy flushed and bit back a smile. “So, Bucky…if I won…”

“Didn’t agree that you won, yet, sweetheart.”

“If I won, I’d want…” Darcy trailed off and threaded her fingers through the soft strands of his hair. She smiled when he leaned against her hand. “I’d want to go on a date.” She glanced at Bucky somewhat timidly.

Bucky chuckled, eyes alight with mirth. “In that case, congratulations, Champ.”