#if anything he'll be helping with getaways during heists

[heyitsburtburt]

I was curious: are Rupert Price/Prince and Charles/Chester still in your space jail? Have you talked to Charster at all?

I've been talking to Charles a lot lately. Mostly him teasing me about my not-crush on Dave and such... I don't think he understand how I uh... feel... about him... I mean he's cute but... yeah...

As for Robert, I don't think he's gonna crack just yet, but apparently the chief's been talking to him a lot lately. It's very rare for him to go down and talk to the prisoners, so I'm wondering what the fuss is about.

But yeah, I think Charles is pretty much ready to be a Toppat. He seemed pretty tired of the government as it was. Going on about some injury and some other stuff that I didn't really pay attention to. I just hope he doesn't join me in comms.

That's the last thing I need.

[delurkr]

Criminal Clarkes AU

BECUZ LISTEN I was really tickled with the crimes tierlist @kindheartedgummybears posted. This isn't necessarily related to that but it's what got me started imagining the Clarkes as a ✨family heist ring✨ because literally yes.

I'm thinking they're mainly burglars, aiming for the safes but cleaning up whatever else they find along the way. They're always planning occasional high stakes burglaries like banks and museums (shoot for the stars amirite) but more often they do smaller house burglaries and sometimes bank robberies for quick money (I want them to have range lol).

Breakdown of everyone's roles under cut, I think I'm a genius:

ANNE - Mastermind, doesn't get her hands dirty much but she's the best at keeping everyone organized. She generally takes a backseat during the actual heists and might not be there at all if it's low risk, but she'll always go along for the big ones because she's excellent at sensing danger and predicting people's next moves, and also because she can easily identify valuables and knows what's worth stealing

Likelihood of getting left behind in a panic: 2% (Stranger things have happened, but really no one would dare)

Likelihood of ratting out the others for a reduced sentence: 30% (She could be convinced, sometimes she wishes she was a lone wolf. But she'll get revenge on whoever made her do it)

JAMES - Second-in-command, sources the supplies and vehicles and such and heads the heists. Way too jumpy ofc (he's this close to making a stupid move in any charged atmosphere), but he's the most attentive to safety, trying to minimize risk beforehand and making sure all the evidence is disposed of and everything

Likelihood of getting left behind in a panic: 40% (He's not a fan favorite)

Likelihood of ratting out the others for a reduced sentence: 25% (But he's already planning how to break them out of jail)

TANYA - Information gatherer in the planning stage, the inside lookout during the heist, and the impromptu distraction if some guard or a neighbor gets suspicious. She goes undercover sometimes to scope out the joints and is basically the public relations member, charming enough to extract a lot of critical information without arousing suspicion

Likelihood of getting left behind in a panic: 5% (Not if Dennis has any say)

Likelihood of ratting out the others for a reduced sentence: 85% (She would, be real)

DENNIS - The muscle ofc. He keeps the hostages in line during a robbery, and during burglaries he's usually the first one to enter to make sure it's clear for the others. He also carries the crowbars and other supplies, but nobody trusts him with the nitroglycerin

Likelihood of getting left behind in a panic: 15% (He's strong, right? He can take of himself...probably)

Likelihood of ratting out the others for a reduced sentence: 35% (They said they would come for him! And then 10 years go by. But he'll believe you if you say they won't get in trouble, so he'll spill a name or two)

ANTHONY - The getaway driver, was there ever any question? He helps with a lot of the prepwork to plan a smooth getaway but he doesn't go in with the others during the heists, he's the outside lookout. And if something goes wrong for everyone inside (say, somebody let Dennis handle the nitroglycerin) he'll be stuck outside helpless to do anything and he'll feel guilty and experience all the horrors of being the lone survivor years down the line but he'll do it from inside a prison complex because he actually was a criminal this time

Likelihood of getting left behind in a panic: 10% (Only by mistake. If he gets left it's because everyone thought he was with someone else)

Likelihood of ratting out the others for a reduced sentence: 15% (Was it on purpose? Who knows what goes on in that brain of his)

MEGAN - MVP, they'd be nowhere without her precision. She's the one to disable the cameras and alarms and crack the safes (her favorite method is torching). Unmatched sticky fingers and maximum stealth, and gets no appreciation. She's not at the scene during bank robberies, she's on the other side of town committing arson to distract the cops

Likelihood of getting left behind in a panic: 3% (Everyone would have to answer to Anne)

Likelihood of ratting out the others for a reduced sentence: 60% (It's their fault that she doesn't feel like part of the team)

VINCE - Normie, not usually involved but he'll run errands and buy the newspapers if the gang is in hideout

Likelihood of ratting out the others for a reduced sentence: 2% (It would get Tanya in trouble)

~

If anyone has different ideas or anything to add I'd love to hear it 😁

[minzart]

Gta5!mc?

Transported while making a getaway after a successful bank heist. When grimm opened mc coffin he was met with them in a clown mask and a bag full of money.

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When Crowley took mc to ramshackle.

Crowley: it.. uh has great... um..charm!

Mc: *who lived in a roach and mouse infested trailer* okay.. this is nice! It don't smell like roaches or anything

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Crowley: whatchu got there mc..?

Mc: *holding a smoothie in one hand and a rocket launcher in the other* A smoothie

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Mc: *slams door open in a huff* *followed by adeuce and grimm*

Riddle: and where have you four been?!

Mc: *crosses arms* I got a job at monstro

Jack: d-did something happen..?

Mc: All I asked for was a fair day's pay, for a fair day's work… and well, he kinda got a little angry. So, I admit, I kinda got a little angry too. *draging in a lumpy, oddly body shaped bag*

Ruggie: So YOU KILLED HIM!?

Mc: What kinda f***ing animal do you take me for? No, I didn't kill him!

Riddle: oh thank 7's

Mc: But I did kidnap one of his eels!*unzips bag to reveal a tied up a knocked out flyod*

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Mc: *using mop as a microphone* Stacy's mom gots it going o-

Azul: eh-EHM

Mc: 🧍🏽‍♀️

Mc: *sweetly*Ya know.. you forget a thousand things every day, azul...*dead serious* make sure this is one of 'em

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Mc: *walking up in a jail cell somewhere in Land of Pyroxene* *achievement unlocked: how did we get here*

Police officer: mc..? It looks like it's your lucky day after the shit you've caused

All the staff plus vil: *crossing arms in silent disappointment*

Mc: *After a long lecture from everyone* *going through their post on MagicCam*

*pictures and videos of them at one of kalim's parties*

*video of them stealing a helicopter and crash landing off the cost of some beach, 'yo car meet..?'*

*picture of angry tiny bald man in a white suit*

*video of them and the same angry bald man: bald man: do you know who I am!? Mc: oh scary... oh...oh..oh shiver me timbers.. SHUT UP MAN*

*video of them doing doughnuts in presumably stolen police car, '🐷🥓'*

*picture of them awkwardly shaking hands with a scary looking man with teal hair, 'yoo @flyod.leech and @mushroom.offical you wouldn't believe who I just met'*

*shaky video of them running from cops, 'I ain't do nothing'*

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Leona: *went to pick up cheka from mc* hey mc! I need the hair ball back.. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WITH MY NEPHEW!?

Cheka: *muffled* HI UNCLE!

Mc: *with cheka who is bound and gagged* teaching him how to get knots out? It's an important life lesson he'll need to know DUH... we needed to simulate the exact scenario!

Cheka: yeah! Mc even taught me how to make mustard gas!

Mc: we agreed that we wouldn't tell them that part.. okay know do this*rubs wrist together* it should lossen up the knots

Cheka: *giggles* Oh yeah! So like this*rubbing his wrist together* *noticing the knots becoming looser* MC IT'S WORKING!

Leona: *under cardiac arrest*

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Mc: *helping Crowley cover up another overblot*

Crowley: it's for the goodness of the school

Mc: if that's our standard of goodness no wonder why this school is so screwed

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Mc: *going ham during beans day event* when there is shit to be won. Goddammit, I want it

Scarabia mob A: *shaking beacuse Rook and Lila are neerby* I don't think-

Mc: *pushes his head down cuz they saw Azul and co.*

Octavinelle mob C: great they're here to now

Scarabia mob A: ah... that's even worst can't we just-

Mc: it's either this..*pointing at Rook and Lila* or dealing with those dimbags over there *pointing at Azul and co.* either way the paint balls will come crackin' at yo ass.

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Mc: *gave grimm some money to buy some treats as he's been good the pass few days*

Grimm: MC *grunts* I'M *grunts* BACK!

Mc: *going to see what he bought* grimm what did...you....buy..? *see's grimm pushing cat tree, 30 deluxe tuna cans and cat bed* GRIMM! I SAID BUY SOMETHING NICE! NOT EXPENSIVE!

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Crowley and the staff announced there was gonna be a feild trip to an amusement park, mc and the first years were told to be on their best behavior. To make sure crewel got a few child leashes for them if they acted out.

Jack: Mc what about all those kids who-

Mc: *dragging seven 6 foot blow up aliens behind them* FUCK THEM KIDS I WON FAIR AND SQUARE!

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Riddle, Leona, Vil and Malleus: *having ideal conversations, while on the tea cup ride*

The first years: *whizzing by in a color blob* AAAHHHAAH

First years: *trying to get off the tea cup ride but are failing*

Staff members: *contemplating whether to help them or not*

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Mc: *enabling kalim to buy more stuff* yes...yes.. now buy the jumbo churro

All in all it was a good a few hiccups here and there nothing made it to the news.

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