#idk jean is just such a complex character and I don't think I nailed him but also this is free and is allowed to be bad.

[chickenbyday]

99 + Jeanneil please :)

Hi hun! This one was sort of out of my comfort zone but I hope you enjoy whatever this raven!neil au is.

It's almost four hours until morning practice is supposed to start, but the way this is going, Jean thinks they'll both be lucky if they manage to patch Nathaniel up before their alarm is supposed to go off. 

"I think this is a new record," Nathaniel says as Jean carefully pulls the stitch together. "I'm almost impressed by how creative he's getting. His dedication would make my father proud." 

Jean says nothing, but he does pause to send him a sharp glare that settles him down a bit, and Nathaniel winces apologetically. 

Jean isn't angry, exactly, because that's a feeling that he squashed long before he made it to this godforsaken place, but whatever heat lingering in his chest is bringing back memories of a past life that he does not even think he remembers. 

"Hey," Nathaniel says softly, the rasp of his voice deafening in the quite of their room. "I'm sorry."

Jean scoffs. "You are not." He does not have any right to be, especially for this. 

"No," he agrees, still too soft. "But I wanted to say it to you anyway." 

Jean shakes his head hard enough that the spot on his neck where there are still teeth marks twinges. "Don't." Do not let him kill you, Jean wants to say, but neither of them have control over that, as much as Jean likes to blame it on his propensity for mouthing off. 

"Okay," he says, not quite defeated but giving it it's best shot. Jean ignores him, looking pointedly down at the skin he's still trying to suture. the cut isn't clean enough for it to come out pretty when all is said and done, but Jean is well practiced enough that it doesn't matter. 

When he finishes, he doesn't look away, because he cannot see what Nathaniel's face is doing right now, what he might be thinking. How dare he be sorry. How dare he. 

Jean has not truly cried in since his first six months of being in the nest, but the burning behind his eyes in a way that he hopes does not pour over. 

"Hey," he says again, and Jean reluctantly drags his gaze up to meet his eyes. "Don't look at me like that." 

Jean doesn't glare again, but it's a near thing. Nathaniel brings his hands to his face cupping his cheeks in his palms. Jean cannot stop himself from leaning into it, just a bit, and closing his eyes. 

"Do not get yourself killed," He says, quiet and damning all the same, and Nathaniel's gaze turns icy and sharp. 

"I won't," he says, and when he leans in and lets their lips meet, Jean can almost pretend that he believes him.