#idk i've been trying to get back into digital draws but not feeling it tbh

[across-stars]

[daydreamerwonderkid]

What fandoms you currently hyperfixated on?

Your oldest fandom?

Your favorite animes?

Favorite games?

How long you've been drawing?

Your favorite character from any franchise you can think of rn?

Sorry for the introgation LMAO, i just want to know more 👀

Lol you're all good, I don't mind asks like this :3

What fandoms you're currently hyperfixated on?

-Currently I'm pretty stuck on Batman/DC (can you tell?), but I'm also really into Dungeon Meshi and Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint. My sister recently introduced me to The Greatest Real Estate Developer and we've both been having an absolute blast with it. Idk if it has that big of a fandom, but it definitely should pffftt

Your oldest fandom?

-I wanna say Marvel and Star Wars since the first movie I ever saw was A New Hope and my first comic books were Spider-man and X-men comics. I was really hardcore into the MCU at its height and I'm a diehard fan of the Clone Wars series.

-Funnily enough, I was getting a bit burnt out by both the Marvel and SW fandoms a while back and that's actually why I got back into Batman and DC XD

Your favorite animes?

-My #1 favorite anime/manga/story of all time has got to be Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood. I don't know what to say about it that hasn't already been said, but it really is that fucking good and Hiromu Arakawa is definitely a huge inspiration to me.

-Other than that, I gotta say Paranoia Agent, Mob Psycho 100, Love is War, Spy x Family, Trigun (haven't seen Stampede yet), Mononoke, Castlevania, and Mushishi. I'm sure there's more, but those were the ones I could think of off the top of my head.

Favorite games?

-There's so many games I play, so I'll try to narrow it down a bit. Tbh my longest favorite running series/franchise has got to be Legend of Zelda. The only game from the series I didn't enjoy was Spirit Tracks, but otherwise I've pretty much enjoyed every single entry.

-I also love the Ace Attorney series, Stardew Valley, Jedi: Fallen Order (I have Survivor, but haven't played it yet), Disco Elysium, the Yakuza series, Ib, etc.

How long you've been drawing?

-Genuinely don't remember when I started. I think I've always been drawing. Of course, I was taught traditional art mediums first. I did a lot of oil painting, watercolor and charcoal drawing. It wasn't until, I wanna say, my third year of college that I started learning about digital art. It's not a medium I'm a 100% comfortable with and I've only recently started feeling more confident with it when I realized I could download brushes that were similar to pencils/ink/charcoal/watercolor/copic markers/etc.

Your favorite character from any franchise you can think of rn?

-That's a little difficult since I have so fucking many XD

-Atm, I can say my brain has been super fixated on Marcille Donato (Dungeon Meshi) and Dick Grayson (Nightwing/Batman). Tbh my brain is constantly rotating my favorites, so it really depends on the day or the week who my new top blorbo(s) is gonna be

[crimsonyuu]

Oh my, yet another sunday and I'm here to write a blog. I might actually see it trough for a year hahahaha we'll see. For this blog I wanna get all the art out of the way first and then talk about what else happend this week!

Week 3: Febuary 21st to 27th 2022

First artwork

"The special find" (Art trade with GddsAlexis)

This is the second out of my big 3 art trades I did this month. The only Zora out of the 3. For 2022 I made the resolution to make illustrations that tell actual stories and don't just look pretty, so I have to try to come up with a concept for every illustration which can be quite difficult if it includes characters that aren't yours. I was inspired by one of the artworks my partner sent me for reference, the character was holding a cool sword so I decided to create an (unofficial origin story). The illustration turned out pretty neat, the lighting is mad cool and has to be my favorite part tho.

Second artwork:

"Following the canyion" (art trade with warwick)

The last art trade I did. For this I tried to simplify the background to give the artwork more dimension, I had the feeling that the bgs in the other artworks were too bussy and took away from the actual character. Here I feel like the character is the main focus and everything else is just a bonus. Also I've hidden a bunch of Koroks in the illustration, can you find them all? (Idk how many there are tbh just a bunch)

Third artwork

Series "canine warriors" from Ōkami

Last post I was talking about drawing the canine warriors and well, here they are. All of the pups were drawn yesterday in one day. (I finished the last one at midnight). Here you have a selection of my favorite ones, find all of them on my instagram. This little series was so much fun, I enjoyed drawing all of them so much. They are quite simple, to fit into the Ōkami artstyle (which I'm pretty good at might I add). Now that I started a new game plus I might be motivated to do even more Ōkami art in the future!

Bonus wip

"By the light of Lumious" sketch

This concept came to me when I had a terrible migrane on Friday. I was laying awake in my bed, unable to sleep and the light from outside was shining in my face. In those moments my mind often wanders and this time it let me to Lumious city. Pokemon X and Y are my favorite pokemon games and they are usually bashed in the community, which isn't fair. I hope to bring some much needed appreciation to the beautiful Kalos region with this illustration.

Oki update:

Here is a little update on my Betta fish Oki, who moved in last week. I want you to know that he's doing great, even started to built some bubble nests. Alltho he turned a little hostile towards me, which is probably just the normal nature of a betta fish.

Life stuff:

Lastly I wanna talk about how my week went, as my last week of my break. To be honest this week wasn't that great as there was a covid case in the family and me getting sick (not with covid). I've spent my last week mostly asleep and feeling a little sick. On top of that creating such big illustrations back to back burned me out quite a bit from digital art, leading to me not drawing as much as I could. On a brither note, I've gotten back into animal crossing and Splatoon2 and launched a new pokemon collab over in my server.

On the topic of pokemon: today they revealed the new gen 9 games (as I predicted) and they look pretty awesome. The overworld looks really fun to explore and the cities are beautiful! However I'm not the biggest fan of the startes, as we've already had a cat and crocodile starter. Something new would have been appreciated tho they are quite cute. My biggest gripe is the character design of the human characters. These people do not look like pokemon characters to be, but remind me of those new anime esque switchsports miis. My guess is that after Leon and Adaman they were convinced they could not create something better in the future and jumped the ship. It's just my educated guess tho. Yea maybe I'll warm up to them if I see more characters like Gym leaders, etc. but we'll see. I'm excited non the less.

That was it for this blog, have a great next week. See you on Sunday!

[chickenisamazing]

The more I do this, the uglier it gets, but it's okay because I think I've mostly figured out how I want to journal and how to use the space in this notebook since I switched from my dot grid to these lined notebooks that I have lying around that I got for free and accumulated over the years. Because of the number of pages, I'm gonna have to use two notebooks this year, and this one is already smaller than last year's notebook, but the second notebook for this year is gonna be even smaller, so it's a process figuring out the right layout. I realize no one cares about this and it's long so the rest is under the cut [[MORE]]

Basically how I have my journal set up currently is:

I skipped the first few pages in case I decide I want an index (I probably won't)

I have my pre-planning spread which is a spacing guide on the left and a journal format brainstorm on the right

I have a future log/year at a glance that takes up four pages/two spreads where I drew out the little calendars for the year and a blank column under each month and whenever I have an event I put it in, so the events won't be in order but I don't care tbh

I have my monthly spread which I changed from last month: last month I had just the calendar on one spread and the next spread was monthly notes on one side and trackers on the right. However, because of the size of the notebook, that space wasn't being efficiently used. This is what it looked like

So I just decided to combine the two so now my monthly spread includes the trackers in the calendar and the notes next to the calendar, since I don't use the monthly notes much anyway. Idk if I like the habit tracker layout bc it's not as good visually but it's a lot easier to actually fill out since I just have to circle the letter instead of trying to figure out how to draw rectangles the right size and space on half a line in a ruled notebook so maybe I'll actually use it this month. Tbh the trackers are only important for prayers and I didn't use them last month but I used them pretty religiously ;) last year, and with the other stuff I generally write about them in my weekly logs if I did them but I thought I'd try including them in my trackers just to see if I could use them.

My weekly spreads are the same as last year's, I write my events with circular bullets and I jot down any brief notes about the day or things I did with dashed bullets. Only difference really is that last year I attempted to be colorful and decorative with my spreads (which didn't work bc I'm not a creative person lmao) so this year all my spreads are looking basically the exact same and I'm liking it this way. I like the simplicity of doing everything with just a black felt tip pen (and a white gel pen for when I mess up and have to scribble things out like in the first pic lol).

Just like last year, after each weekly log I have my weekly notes which, also like last year, are completely undecorated and just say "WEEKLY NOTES" at the top. I use this for to do lists mostly but also anything else I feel like writing; it's the "everything notebook" part of this journal.

I don't really plan to have any other kinds of spreads but that can change of course if I feel like it. Last year I would start them and not really use them (except for a couple of important ones but I'll just refer back to the old notebook for those) so I prefer just writing everything in the weekly notes section.

I feel like I do actual journaling here bc I just make personal posts about my thoughts and feelings all the time and all my productivity in my notebook and I just think it's funny bc I feel like most people prefer to do productivity stuff digitally and journaling analog but I'm the opposite, mostly bc I feel like my hands when I'm writing can't catch up to my brain and so writing becomes a chore. That's why I'm glad I started writing bullet points about my day in my weekly log, it's much more manageable and if there's anything I really want to remember I can just write it without worrying about capturing the moment and stressing about language. I know like my preference for analog productivity and digital journaling isn't unique obviously but I still do think it's kind of funny bc I'd have thought it'd be the opposite.

On an slightly unrelated note, I haven't been using google calendar much lately and I've been relying on my notebook but that's not good, I need to have things in both places to feel like I know what's going on. I think it's mostly because of the Bangladesh trip tbh but also since I graduated I feel like I've been falling off of using google calendar, but it's still what I use when I make appointments esp when I'm out and about, so I need to use it more regularly so I don't miss out on stuff.

[finsterhund]

Thinking

The reason I've been so depressed this past week is because I'm getting too old. It's frightening. Extremely frightening. I haven't mentally aged (beyond getting wiser and having more experience) since I was about 8 or 9 but my legal age, and more pressingly, my body have. And the fact that I am a very sickly person means that I'm aware of my mortality more than most people are. I can ignore it most of the time but now it's just sorta snuck up on me and I'm terrified. My bones are getting weaker, my chronic pain worsens, the flare ups when the air pressure changes are getting to the point that it can keep me off my feet when it happens.

I'm also aware of the fact that especially since moving up north that I don't have hardly any friends in real life within visiting range. I don't have people who can come over and hang out. Not only that, but I really can't deny how not having friends who will actually play with me, legitimately, actual play engagements, really does get me down more than I let on. Running around and having adventures and acting out fun elaborate stories like some sort of live action role playing isnt something I've actually gotten to do in a very very long time, because that's something most people grow out of incredibly quickly. I'm just sorta, starved for emotional stimulation, attention, and experiences. There really isn't a cure for this either.

Being stuck unable to mentally mature means that after a certain point socializing in a way that is natural for me becomes impossible. It's a very lonely experience and tbh it's made my depression a fair bit worse.

I also fear that me not getting access to medical attention is going to eventually mean i won't be able to at all and that it will be too late.

I'm just such an extremely lonely person, and I guess that's making the fact that I have a trauma disorder worse. Lack of mental stimulation means there's nothing to keep the voice of "hyperarousal" (stupid name for it but that's the official one) away.

I have trouble playing games and watching movies because my life just is so empty so much of the time that they're not enough to sedate how rabid my brain gets. I can't focus on things.

I'm sure I'm thinking so much about these things because my friend will be gone for a whole month and all that.

I got a large dog helium balloon that is very nice that I want to try to photograph. I am staring at it and it helps me feel better.

I keep thinking of how my birth mom is trying really hard to coerce me back there but I know I won't be healthy because she puts things above my personhood and safety. But the desire for parental affection is really strong.

I think first thing I need to get my friend to help me with when he gets back is to finally put me back on some sort of medicine for my disorder because although things weren't perfect back in like 2015 things felt easier to manage. But I think that was also because more things were going on in my life too.

I think it's that I know I should be making the nost of the time I have left but I'm incapable of doing things by myself.

My brain keeps beobg drawn back to the 90s where I can pretend I had a better childhood with better parents and everything appeared as if it was so much more simpler back then.

I'm sorry I've latched onto beanie babies so tightly that's just the biggest manifestation of that. I need too get back into the swing of drawing HoD fan art and scanning my traditional commissions but I'm realizing that I crave physical stimuli in life. The beanies are physical toys with more textile variation than copies of the game or digital stimuli. Its why I latch onto stuffed Whisky so much.

I think something that would really help would be to fix up vintage toy dogs and get them collars and stuff like that. I feel the failure with the baking soda upset me a bit too much.

I hope everything goes back to normal. I wish I could be self sufficient.

Also world news is very dark and depressing, bad people in the world, fears about the future of the websites I use, friends disappearing, me having to use a computer that isnt the best, just a bunch of factors that I guess tire me out.

My one friend says I need a vacation. Just the ability to go to one of those bright beaches with lots of sand and sit on a chair and drink iced tea and then play in the shallow water for a bit. That sort of thing. Not have to worry about money or anything. Just running around on the beach and having fun. I'm actually scared of the ocean and dont go swimming very much because of my pain but the cliche vacation still sounds very appealing. Just like going to Disneyland or going to Europe does. I wish I wasn't so blegh that I could go to water parks and stuff but that is very situational and health permitting. As is playing in snow. I'd like to go camping too.

Anyways, have a ded Andy.

Idk I'm going to try to sleep now. It's very hot here.

[soonhoonsol]

No no never be sorry it's completely fine!!! Ilysm ok just take care of yourself that's more important to me!

It's been ok lol I've been so busy and got in a slump for a while so I didn't really feel like it...but after doing that top kpop songs post I realized how much I had fun doing it so I'm back at it!! :) I just don't have any ideas haha I'm thinking about maybe taking requests so that way I can put out content more regularly but idk.....

Yeah you have a point there....it's kinda sad to see because at this point with Cait's character she could probably leave too without much story impact which sucks.....OMG I've felt the same especially this season!!!! well it's picked up a tiny bit with this whole war of the Godspeeds going on lol 12 Godspeeds though like how????

No I haven't I'm starting to though!! I'm practicing and trying to get used to drawing in photoshop first because I have yet to try digital art and that's what I really want to do but thank you for the words of encouragement means a lot <3<3

Ok from what I gather from the newest episode he lost it trying to save the legends but they could still explain it better :/ but it's nice to see Astra doing magic regardless <3<3 and I think your right from the newest episode they are trying to do a romance with Behrad and Astra idk how I haven't noticed before omg

omg Nate as Constantine killed me afekm OH OH OH idk how I got reminded of this lol but I watched Teen Titans Go vs. Teen Titans!!!! I loved it the nostalgia....brought me back to my childhood I felt so old for some reason haha

you're the sweetest kindest bean ily :((

yay!!! i'm glad to see you back hehehe >< your top 10 set was amazing! i loved it so much. requests tho... if you do open up requests i'll ask for something 👀

Cait deserves better :(( i heard there was some drama apparently about how Iris' actress isn't on set when Cait's actress is directing an episode? idk if that rumour is true but Iris has been suspiciously missing the past 2 episodes...

12 Godspeeds tho... i'm very excited to see this unfold!

oooh i'm sure you'll be great at digital art! fighting!!

ahh right... makes sense. this season has just been so confusing to me T~T i feel that Behrad/Astra romance isn't gonna work right off the bat? Astra has such high levels of confidence and self-sufficiency; i doubt she'll consider romance tbh

Nate as Constantine still flirting with Zari tho askahsgd >< but omg yay!! yes the nostalgia is just very nice :')) especially with the voice actors too!