#idk i haven't been in edinburgh for a long time

[avid-avian-lives]

rancher omens au development nov. 11

in addition to being one of the Them, Scott is going to make an appearance in the history section as a former friend/lover of Jimmy. currently, I'm looking into the best ways that he could fit in. details under the cut! this one has a few bulleted lists, so I'll save you the scroll :>

at the bottom of this post is a poll!! y'all can put in your two cents on my conundrum here

in all cases they'd probably stay together for about ten years before Jimmy decides to leave or Scott dies, depending

the first draft I made takes place in 1906, where Jimmy meets Scott (a flower seller) while moping over Tango (who he hasn't seen in fifty years.) after a while, he moves into Scott's flower field. but Jimmy feels an obligation to help in the face of WWI and fakes his own death since he can't tell Scott the truth or bring himself to lie and say he wants to leave.

pros:

Tango has to know about Scott, and he could find out during the 1941 minisode. that could be a really cute moment in which Scott (now much older) says something like "you look so much like someone I used to know"

I really struggled with finding a reason for Jimmy to leave Scott that didn't have them ending on a bad note, and I don't want it to end on a bad note. WWI works as a great excuse for this

poppies were a symbol of death during WWI, meaning that theoretically, a blessing from Jimmy on Scott's flowers could've caused that. that would mean that Scott sold thousands of poppies in the years following WWI in a beautiful gesture towards a man he lost long ago

cons:

I'm not totally sold on the idea that Jimmy would even entertain the idea of friendship with Scott while he's so miserable over Tango. I really caked on the angst during the 1854 scene, so Jimmy wouldn't just get over it (he only barely does so in 1967.)

something doesn't fit about Scott knowing about the tavern. if that's somewhere he regularly goes to sell flowers, even after Jimmy "died," then he should be able to recognize the exact same building that supposedly got sold to someone else many years ago.

currently, Scott just kinda... walks into the tavern?? talk about pushy salesman

my second idea was that they met somewhere between rome (41AD) and wessex (535AD). I'm not totally sure how that timeline would work and I haven't written anything for it lol

pros:

the main pro is that I think it would be reeeeeallly sweet if Jimmy named Scotland after Scott bc "it's his place, he belonged here"

it would also not interfere much with the overarching timeline bc there's a huuuuge expanse of time (~500 years) that is given no official content, so I have a lot of space to work with

cons:

it would be a lot goofier to write bc idk much about the era, but since it's such a wide era I could probably find something to work with

I have no idea how Tango would find out about Scott if it's been hundreds of years since Jimmy saw him. since there's isn't a way that it would end happily, (either Jimmy leaves or Scott dies or something) Jimmy would hardly be volunteering that information. but Tango has to find out somehow, and I want that to be established information somewhere

my third thought was sometime during the 70s with the hippie era

pros:

obviously the theme of "the flower human" (as Tango call him in 2008) fits in fairly well with Scott lol

Tango would be aware of Scott bc he probably met Scott. we could also see Tango get into Queen music which would be kinda funny

cons:

Scott and Tango being around at the same time would be weird. I'm not a huge fan of the idea

established hippie culture doesn't lend itself to two men living alone in a big flower field, so I'm not sure what exactly I'd do with that to work it out

I'd have to take out the line "I'm in love with him, aren't I?" from Jimmy referring to Tango in 1941 bc it wouldn't make much sense to establish that and then turn it around right away

my final thought was during the short stretch of time between Edinburgh (1820s) and St. James Park (1854).

pros:

Tango is missing during this time but comes back soon after

the increased angst potential of 1854 >:) I already increased the angst of this scene and would be all for doing it again

after edinburgh Jimmy would be in Scotland anyway, clearing the tavern problem from 1906

cons:

it's a little pushy in terms of the overarching timeline. both edinburgh and st james are reeeally important parts of the story (even if edinburgh doesn't appear in the history section), and I'm not sure putting another factor in there would be a good idea

I'm also not sure what exactly would happen between them. after a while, Jimmy would spend this time worried about Tango, since he's been missing for 30ish years. would Jimmy be as worried as I need him to be if he spent that time with someone else?

ALRIGHT

currently I only have work down for 1906, but I'll probably end up fleshing out all these ideas more and posting them as bonus content :>

[terpernoctem]

hi pals

do you know what time it is?

it's time for our ✨monthly personal post ✨ show of hands, who's excited?

i said WHO'S EXCITED

okay never mind, so it rained for about the entire month of january, not even kidding. it rained and it rained and it kept raining for days on end.

see, i left Ireland for a specific reason (burn out excluded): breaking news, i know, but it rained a lot over there. i come back home and it's the most it's ever rained since 2015, people.

do you comprehend?

i think maybe the universe is trying to tell me something

anyways

so it rained a lot and i felt like i was about to rot all the way but i didn't and in fact i (1), got into yoga again, (2) wrote almost 10k, (3) took my very first driving lessons (i'm comically terrible at it but eh), (4) applied to things!

isn't that something??

idk

i don't feel any less lost or you know, useful in any way but it's a start, innit

i've definitely had a couple of bad nights, and what's funny when you live with your parents as an adult is that you still cannot talk to them about serious stuff without feeling like a teenage waste of space? or at least that's how i feel—and i recognize entirely it doesn't come from my parents, god no, they've been great and really supportive, but ughhhh.

what is it about this whole situation that makes me age backwards (and not in a good way)??

in other, completely related news, my birthday is a couple of weeks away, which is always kind of the time i typically freak out about it (last year i booked a last minute trip to edinburgh for that very reason). then i calm down and start to get excited about it.

question is: with the big 30 looming over, will i get excited at all about it this year?

mmh.

it's a daunting thought. let's not—let's put it aside, shall we?

truly, a part of me still can't believe how lucky i am to be able to stay with my parents here on the island—it's genuinely something i didn't think i'd be able to do for a long time— and it's objectively great, i mean, it's summer (well, you know, as summer as it can get), i've got time to myself, i've got my loved ones close.

yet another part of me longs for a more, idk, exciting? life. i might be repeating myself but i feel like i haven't seen everything i'd like to see yet. been toying loosely with the idea of going the self-entrepreneur path, but ugh—

truth is, i can't bear to be tied down yet.

on this week's list: sort out the library situation (mom's library is—oh don't get me started, but i'm gonna fix this), get serious about studying for driver's test, finish drafting my main wip, find a life purpose.

[skiptomyylu]

Okay um- where do I begin?

Why does there seem to be a small collective of people who seem to believe that Aziraphale needs to be like...slapped across the face to realize Heaven is Bad or that he made the "wrong" ""choice"".

Like- hmmmm...

No hate to any of them I guess but it's verryyuuhh..eeeek..

I think what some people need to realize is that:

Point A. People don't HAVE to go through a super huge "glitch in the matrix" mental crumble to realize things and even if they do it doesn't guarantee a change.

Point B. Aziraphale isn't stupid in the slightest

Point C. He KNOWS this already??

Point D. We know that this doesn't guarantee growth (in G.O., idk about irl)

Point E. He didn't go back for Heaven?? (Or at least how it is)

Allow me to elaborate(Prepare to read) :

It feels like whenever people think he needs to have a big crash and burn realizaion or a very "in your face" thing that proves to him heaven is bad or something or the other...uuh...it reads off as "I've given up hope in him figuring this out on his own and nothing else will make him realize this except his own suffering.." (Not saying this is DEFINITELY think but it's what it feeeells like). Which...isn't true

(Point A)

Firstly lets say it DID happen. that won't necessarily make him LEAVE let alone REBELL. When I had my own personal kinda religious breakdowns (of sorts) I didn't just get up and leave the religion. It took me...many many years. I feel like I still haven't left it. I still look up to the heavens and say "sorry" if I feel as though I've said something too blasphemous. Personally it makes him even MORE vulnerable and MORE malleable in the hands of heaven and his god. Experiencing that kind of doubt and mental conflict is HARD. It is so difficult. One side of you is SCREAMING run and the other side is looking for ANY ounce of hope to cling on to to think "maybe it's not so bad".

(Point B and C)

But you know what's so great? Aziraphale doesn't need to experience that! HOORAAYYY! YIPEE! He's already been having his own personal thought's and conflicts about heaven for YEARS! It's been slowly chipping away for 6000 years dude! 6000 YEARS!

The Gravediggers in Edinburgh to Noahs Arc to Job. There's also, idk, him working for almost 11 years to try and redirect the child who he thought was the ANTICHRIST in order to stop the one thing Heaven and Hell longed for for years? He's been thinking and mulling things over and we have SEEN it. MULTIPLE TIMES. Aziraphale is INCREDIBLY intelligent so I promise you he already knows and there's no need for any suffering.

(Point D)

Next: We've already seen the "kill the angel you once were" thing with Crowley and that didn't make Crowley...groww per say??? Or even feel better-

We've SEEN him struggle with accepting his fall. We see he still gets emotional about it (Him in his flat looking up to Heaven and lamenting. Him getting drunk and talking about it). We know they cause him an incredible amount of stress to the point where he was willing o dump the ARCHANGEL (fucking) GABRIEL in the middle of nowhere in order to preserve his safe space.

He's called the existence on earth that they've carved out for themselves precious, peaceful, and fragile. Meaning it brings him comfort but he also feels like it could break in his hands or get destroyed for him at any moment.

All this to say: Killing off who Aziraphale is now doesn't guarantee his betterment or anything.

(Point E)

Final Point:

He did not go back for Heaven. He went back to make a difference. To change things and improve things. For the hopes he can do something to help the side of the "good guys" to start acting like fucking good guys! So yknow...theres no more need for him to try and rebel or have any breakdowns.

I hope all this makes sense. I'm like half asleep typing all of this lmao.

Time for a nap!

Luwa out!

The creepiest take I've ever seen.

You're "giddily excited" to watch a character experience a shattering psychological breakdown? That is deeply concerning.

Worse - you think it's necessary for him to go through something like that for his personal growth? What a dark world that would be, if that were the case.

(Btw he already went through a "rebelling against heaven psychological breakdown moment" in Uz. But that's a bit of a side issue here. After all, the main takeaway from that scene is how utterly f*cked-up it is that he, and Crowley, had to experience something like that at all.)

Friends, if anyone ever tells you you need to "experience a death of self" to grow as a person - RUN.

This is giving the same energy as the "we must die to ourselves in order to give ourselves fully to God" crap that the worst fundamentalists I encountered growing up tried to stuff down people's throats. It's deeply disturbing to me to find variations of that attitude outside of toxic religious communities. I was hoping it was confined there, but apparently not.

People who don't have the qualifications need to stick FAAAAAAR away from this kind of "psychological" analysis. "Kill the angel he once was in order to let the individual shine" is pseudoscientific BS. (Let's not forget Crowley is by no means happy to be a demon, and was just as happy, happier in fact, before he fell.)

This kind of attitude is genuinely dangerous.