#idk i feel like working is a safa environment for me and i'm lucky i found those people there | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thundermilch · 7 years

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2.30 am

I just came back from a local pub where I went after work with two girls that work with me. It was completely random and we did nothing special besides eating and talking but even though they don’t know me like I would usually like someone to know me before hanging out, they are really nice and even though they are a bit older I felt way more accepted than I thought I’d be. They’re nice idk, it was a good night. Actually when they asked me to go I was like starting to panic and I got anxiety and my stomac clenched and I was like “guys… i think i can’t eat..” and they were like dOESNT MATTER YOU COME WITH US WITHOUT EATING and idk it was very nice of them and completely new for me to be involved into someone else’s plans so easily and without feeling too awkward

#i mean now i feel guilty cause it wasnt too late and i could've used that time to study #but it was really nice #to change my plans even if for a small thing like this #they don't know me at all and i'm like a supertotal mess at work and still they don't hate me!!!#i mean #h o w #i'm used to ppl hating me or plain ignoring me cause i'm always the most invisible thing in the room #and then i have like 2 frens that know the best and worst of me and are always with me but we don't get to hang out that often #idk i feel like working is a safa environment for me and i'm lucky i found those people there #at least they are a distraction and they're outgoing enough to balance my social awkwardness #idk #elena babbles #nice people #i'm grateful really #it's the worst time of my life rn and even the smallest hint of feeling loved makes me go like w h o a ?!?

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