#idk how long ago i started this but
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the end of the end
#hello long time no see#im done w my thesis yay!!!!!! yippee!!#heres a concept i had started forever ago that i decided to finish#i wanted hatchling to have a sense of urgency but they look kinda excited lol#but i mean if u think about it.. hatchling would probably feel some kind of excitement to end the loop even if clouded by anxiety and worry#and oh god what if i dont make it what if i mess it up#idk idk i dont hate how it turned out so im sharing it hehe#outer wilds#outer wilds hatchling#outer wilds fanart#outer wilds spoilers#i still need to play the dlc ahhh#im scared of getting seriously sucked back in yknow#my art#fanart#animation
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The weird feeling of being a longtime fan and realising that my own views of Anakin and Padme don’t seem to align with hardly anyone else’s these days… not even the current pro-Anidala side of tumblr fandom.
#I appreciate the passionate defense of the characters and their relationship I’m seeing lately#don’t get me wrong#but there’s a lot that leaves me a bit confused or feeling like I’d be kicked out of the fandom if anyone knew 😅#idk if the current fandom skews young or what#but it’s a bit of a mindfuck#back when I started this blog over 8 years ago#Anidala was a very tiny fandom and we just gushed over them in our own little bubble#and people were chilled and happy to enjoy both PT and TCW Anidala at the same time#without feeling like they had to disown any of it#idk I’m just feeling out of place lately 🤷♀️#tired of the constant standoffish energy in the fandom#feels like everyone has been in defensive too long they forgot how to enjoy the ship#I wish people would just chill with me and enjoy romantic or happy au headanons 🥰
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man rodeoh hasnt added my not so good review and now im starting to wonder if theres some suspicious reason they dont have any reviews under 4 stars
#its an underwear brand i tried out awhile ago#they felt really cheap and thin and unstretchy when they arrived and within a year completely fell apart at the seams#like i ripped the waistband right off from just putting them on.#the croctches wore right out to nothing and im not even active! i hardly do anything!#and like maybe a year is too much to ask for clothing nowadays but idk i feel like they should last longer than that#i cant afford to replace all my underwear every year#also for tboy oriented underwear i was sorely disappointed that they didnt have pad functionality#idk man#rodeoh#maybe they just arent made for big fat guys idk#the inseam was awkwardly proportioned so it crumpled a lot under my belly but wasnt long enough to go over it#i tried to record a video of how easy it was to pull em apart but it just made me look really strong and also like the start of an OF#i need some validation that im not the only one that experienced this iim dying squirtle
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I have only one word and one word only : CRI CRI CRI CRI CRI CRI CRI CRI CRI
"I intended to skip Purgatory 2 to catch up faster on VODs since I was told they were unrelated lore-wise But my biggest mistake was to vibe check all the new players - I was not expecting to completely fall head over heels for Team Capybara, hot damn I love them all so much ????" - Me, February 2024
────────────────────────────────────────── Support all the admins that spoke out (& do your daily click) ──────────────────────────────────────────
I took @sunshinetomioka's werewolf Guill headcanon and ran with it btw, credit to it
#you have no idea how painful it was of a dilemma for me to only pick one outfit for Jinki i am so bitter about it#JimmyBoyyy#Bastet#Bagi#TheGuill84#Scottonauta#Jinkiwinkki#the common factors between all the brazilians is the nose piercing#wait no actually this Bagi design doesn't have one here for some reason but my usual one does#btw i was hesitant for a long time before posting this because I didn't know what to think of my Bagi design U_U#Bagi is a veteran player which means I came up with a design for her months ago AND seperately from the Purgatory 2 new crew#and I had this artistic direction with all my other designs for veteran players that they would all look bruised and bloodied with dirty-#-torned up clothes and what not because it was Purgatory 1 back then (which is why my poor girl Bagi looks rOuGH here)#but then when I started drawing the new players I made them all look shiny and brand new#and I still cleaned up Bagi in her Purg2 version (no blood on her outfit !!) but she still clashes a bit with everyone else so idk man.#Also theres my watermark on this one when i said i wouldnt do that anymore for q fanarts#because this post has been up and ready since February and I lost the original files because I have a bad habit of not ctrl+S#ah et à mes mutu fr : Guill c'était le seul fr de tout qsmp dont je n'avais jamais regardé le contenu avant voilàdesbisousbye#qsmp#purgatory 2#qsmp purgatory 2#mcyt#my art
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Organ Farmers Market
#artists on tumblr#animated illustration#animated gif#illustration#my art#what if we ate eyeballs at the organ farmers market and we were both cattheys#so this started as a DTIYS like SO long ago i just went fuck it im redesigning the character and idk how i landed on jars of eyeballs#i like the idea of a necromancer depot situation... like... get all the parts for your homonculous here. but it was no thoughts head empty#anyway my favorite part is how the eyeball looks like how a sheet of metal being waggled around sounds. wubba wubba wubba#weirdly eyeball on a stick is something i drew alot as a kid so. this is for you 6th grade geo. heads up your trans
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this line makes me wonder how long hori has had their backstory in mind, because in even in 193 afo states that yoichi was the only family he had left.
so I wonder if hori had their backstory in mind from the beginning or if he only had a vague idea of what their childhood looked like at this point.
I wouldn't be surprised if he did have their orphaned as babies backstory in mind here because the backstory explains so much of afo's behavior and the comic book they read was first mentioned here so he had to have some idea of how they stumbled across the comic that changed their lives at the very least ...
#I also remember this line was used by a lot of people who theorized they were orphaned children#which yes they were right except the way they were orphaned and how their childhood turned out was far worse than anyone imagined#but idk I think he had it in mind here already considering he said he fleshed out the ofa holders back stories in detail long ago#so I feel he would have an idea of how afo and yoichi's background was when writing this scene#because this is one of the most important scenes in the story it's where everything started#we wouldn't find out the full story between these two until 5 years after this chapter first dropped though 😭#it's funny how people used to accuse you of woobifying afo if you said he prob had a sad backstory#and here comes hori with a chair giving him one of the most tragic backstories in the series lol
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How strange! Someone has unearthed a mysterious comic diary!
#this took me SO long to finish I think I started on this a month or two ago but it's finally done!#Idk if I'll actually continue this as a series or not but I'm happy with how this turned out!#issanava#shin megami tensei iv#smt4#issachar#navarre#rustyburacedraws
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ngl it makes me want to die a little bit that it's so often trans people who feel that sex is mutable but oppression is always-forever based on asab in ways that allow them to demand that information from other trans people. like it feels fucking bad. it feels bad when it's people holding up someone who posts a lot of selfies as transition goals to a degree they have to clarify what they have or haven't done or what "direction" they're going in, it feels worse when people are out there like "caster semenya is not tma" or whatever the fuck. i am, as always, not a trans woman, but here's a sentiment echoed by many of the trans women around me who log the fuck off, quoted directly from one: "people who draw a clear line where they say that semenya or khelif are tme and then call me tma are just calling me male at this point".
like i get it. i really do. we seek community and shared experiences, and we feel betrayed when people have less in common with us than we thought they did. [*more on this later.] but that's not those people's faults and my god in the case i'm seeing play out on twitter rn this poor person did absolutely nothing to intentionally mislead people, just posted pictures of their actual kid self. who looks a lot like i did, because shockingly enough "we can always tell" doesn't fucking work for trans people either!
on the one hand i move in intersex circles which are unapologetically welcoming in cis "dyadic" people with pcos, because it serves nobody to draw a clear line where mutilation or genetics or some ineffable childhood suffering are what make somebody intersex, especially when most of us (esp in places like nz) have never been karyotyped and are being treated for symptoms without a pinned-down cause anyway. the more of us there are the stronger we are, the more pressure we can exert on a medical profession which doesn't like to consider how common outliers are, how uneasy sex is at all. and then on the other hand there's dyadic trans people on the internet who've yelled me out of spaces because a couple of traumatised incarcerated trans women i worked with as a prison abolitionist assumed i was also a trans woman and i didn't immediately tell them my entire csa-involved history of being sexed in varying ways as an infant and child and/or exactly how big my phallus was at birth or where in my junk config my urethra lives so they could decide i was tme or whatever.
returning to the * for a related but not identical thought: i think presuming shared experiences leads to some fucked shit in general! "oh we all had a radfem phase" or "oh we all were channers" no we fucking weren't and it's particularly obnoxious when me & mine are trying to build trans community locally to organise and resist the growing wave of far-right backlash against our existence, and there's just white people in there on a spectrum from "straight up being antisemitic and trying to get the n-word pass" through "handwringing about how they need to make space for people who aren't politically correct" to "handwringing about how brown people are right to be mad at them but doing shit fuckall". and then the other fucking brown people in the space are on some identity politics shit where they're like "trans joy inherently excludes those of us who could get deported" or "big city white queers are killing us by being visible instead of going stealth bc it stirs up the discourse" or whatever the fuck i've heard pulled out this year. there's a bunch of reasons i primarily organise outside of trans spaces and that's one of them. i've never felt more alone in spaces where people claim we're all the same than being left as the brownest moderator or organiser in a space full of people to whom "this is a safe trans space" apparently means they get to abdicate all other responsibilities not to lapse into presumed shared patterns that are fucking racist or otherwise alienating. i've never felt more alone than surrounded by exclusively trans people who sort people into boxes and assume everyone in those boxes has the transition goals they have. like i was on cypro until it disagreed with me to the point of endocrine crisis and now i'm on t and at both those points people were so fucking presumptive or entitled to my reasons or journey or personal relationship w my body
literally just submitted on (and was invited to consult on) the nz law commission's review of the human rights act and like. it's straight up fucked how many nz trans people fully do not comprehend that any "sex assigned at birth" type definitions fundamentally exclude migrants who have no way of proving it and many intersex people who happen to have been reassigned later or many times or never assigned at all as a baby. we can't make law with this shit and that's why we have to have symmetrical protections for all genders/sexes/expressions/presentations, bc naming and defining a protected class here often leaves the people who already are left out from those shared experiences of marginalisation out in the cold when they face violence
#reblogs turned off because obviously i'm already bracing to be pilloried for saying one thing not quite correctly or whatever#and also bc i have zero interest in having this be boosted by trans dudes on their own transandrophobia agenda either#i'm just venting#but frankly the first time i got yelled at for saying that as an intersex person some of the immense violence i experienced as a child#was motivated by transmisogyny#i was a teenager and it was someone a fair bit older than me with more local clout so like. it's been a decade. how is it worse now.#intersex spaces have made SO much progress and yet#also yes i'm femme! i'm femme in a trans way! many dykes who aren't women are!#many of us got more comfortable w it as adults who had gender agency!#in literally the same way it took my wife ages after transitioning to work out she's also butch and doesn't actually want to do femme thing#bc that's a shared experience in how we've navigated the expectations of womanhood before opting out of the parts we don't want!#anyway the lawcomm shit was fucked bc honestl i don't give a shit if someone lost their gonads as an adult in an accident#they should be protected even if they don't consider themselves intersex#and we know that gender as an axis of oppression comes back to the reproduction of the nuclear family#and that cis women who can't have kids sometimes become the political football though ofc not as much by far and like#idk. y'all ever heard about solidarity? sometimes i feel like i'm back in the place where the loudest traumatised person at the party#is yelling at another young woman like “you'll never understand what it's like to be a victim”#when said young woman was assaulted the week before.#a politics that starts by defending and defining oneself w oppression kinda fucking sucks actually#and intersex people stopped policing intersexness by who got mutilated a long time ago#bc actually we want the generations ahead to not get that treatment#and when i see “trans elders” going on about how “if you pass and got on hrt before 18 you're not trans like i am” i'm like. why! what!#anyway. tired.#may regret this. we shall see#tony muses
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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chat how are we feeling about saeyoung angst
#drew this weeks ago n thought it was good#but then i stared at it for too long and the face and legs started to look weird so i started to go :(#idk i did a couple things right i’m just still learning and trying to figure out my art style despite having been drawing for 6+ years#also trying to post my art more but i’m insecure ☹️#anyway here’s my baby boy#707#saeyoung choi#mystic messenger#my art#mysme#mysme seven#mysme saeyoung#fanart#actually i think the shading is pretty good (for me) it’d probably be great if i hadn’t gotten impatient and insecure#also this is supposed to be like in the context of saeran’s after end. i’m not good at environments so i left it barren lol#art#mysme fanart#mm seven#idk how i’m supposed to tag things when does it get excessive
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I used to watch Grian way back in Hermitcraft S1 so seeing you post about it actually makes me insanely nostalgic lmao. Nice to hear about people I haven’t watched in years :)
I can only imagine the nostalgia you must be feeling, omw - S1 was over a decade ago, from what I gather Hermitcraft has changed soo much since then
Thanks for sharing that nugget of information, my mind is genuinely blown
#I hope you don't mind me adding tags to this? <3#hermitcraft#hermitcraft smp#hermitcraft season 10#hermitblr#asks#I picked up HC around the very start of season 7 (the season after Grian joined) when my sister recommended his and mumbo's channels to me#I guess you would have watched Grian's building content then and/or early hermitcraft?#I wonder if you ever watched Evo actually it'd be interesting to know about how long ago you stopped watching those kinda creators#thanks for sending in the ask btw! I really enjoy answering them#Oh yeah forgot to add#Grian#idk if it’s even worth adding hermitcraft season one lol
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in the collective reality where oda actively bothers to do something with alvida and/or galdino in this new post cross guild going for the one piece reality, how plausible do u consider either of them actively caring for buggy or going behind his back to help him in some way? i find the fact oda kept alvida with the narrative extremely fascinating and it frustrates me how she is so underutilised (then again with such a huge cast it is hard to get every character to do a lot, but alvida could have been discarded quite easily post loguetown. yet here she is, a 1000 chapters later, sitting on the cross guild couch drinking wine)
i do wonder sometimes what oda is thinking when he keeps characters like cabaji, mohji, and alvida around a thousand chapters since they last really did anything. does he like drawing them? does he want to throw a bone to the handful of east blue stans out there who miss when op pirate crews had a simple gimmick they stuck to? is he trying to show that buggy lifts his crew up with him, or refuses to leave anyone behind? i just don't know.
modern day alvida has a lot in common with galdino. she's calculating, analytical, and sides with the person who will give her the greatest advantage. that's been buggy for a long time because he's had the appearance of power for a long time. even now, the appearance of power is still there. does she actually care for buggy? does galdino? i'm not sure.
but for the purposes of answering this question, let's assume that she does, that they both do. i think their pragmatism still outweighs any fond feeling, unless:
it's to their significant advantage to help buggy, and/or
they won't get caught
safety above all else, you know? and getting on either mihawk or crocodile's bad side is not particularly safe behavior.
#tos answers#deadbodyrave#one piece#buggy#alvida#mr. 3#do not get me STARTED on alvida's mistreatment and neglect in the story!!#the apparent massive personality change she went through the second she lost weight/got pretty... ohhhh Oda You Are My Enemy#and suddenly she's the straight man in any goofy buggy pirate scene! where's my raging narcissist who hit a rubber boy with an iron mace?!#it's what fandom always does to the One Girl On The Team (she's either team mom or has the only brain cell) except it happened In Canon#sighs. and it happened so long ago there's really no point in protesting it now. clever pragmatic alvida is just who she is.#...i *am* curious how invulnerable the slip-slip fruit is to. like. swords. i think she's safe from crocodile but idk about mihawk.#—pragmatic characters
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birthday !! 🍊🌼
#nami one piece#one piece#fanart#cat burglar nami#nami#anime#manga#clip studio paint#artists on tumblr#my art#romance dawn#one piece nami#one piece anime#one piece manga#recently got back into one piece again ! watched it a few years ago but stopped around ep 80 (i think)#i started it again from ep 1 with the intention to casually watch and catch up#idk how long it'll take but its been a fun ride so far!#east blue
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thank you unorthodox artists for everythign ever...i keep watching art tutorials n stuff from mostly people who do it for a living/are professionals and ig that sense of strictness and perfectionism rubs off on me and messes with me severely as someone whos just doing it for fun.....but i think of this 1 artist whose vid i saw where he was like Well yeah most teachers tell you to do this specifically, but i prefer to do it the way they tell you not to because its just better for me and if you also struggle with doing things the way youre told to its okay to do things a bit differently etc... (specifically the example he used was how he drew while holding his pencil as if he was writing, even though most art vids i watch say to only do that when drawing small details) and its like. Shoutout 2 people like these......you dont need to fit the perfect mold some of us have issues some of us are disabled some of us cant afford the time, energy or supplies....sometimes you just do what fits you best...you can still make good art....
#ive always had hand tremors but i def think theyve gotten worse since i started taking these new meds almost like a year ago now#idk how long ill be on them but its been making me sad how hard i cant draw good long strong lines#but well i did figure out no i can work with them#i can still make nice things cant i....#t
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i hate when people portray michael and/or patrick as some kind of master manipulator who was terrible to shaun and stormy. like, in the past, michael sometimes got portrayed with little autonomy, or as childish and overly innocent in a weird way. that in itself is an issue with the treatment of mentally ill characters (infantilization), but the solution isn't to argue that he's actually a monster who only wanted to hurt and mislead people. the same goes for patrick. i don't enjoy the "goofy flirty mass murderer" interpretation for very similar reasons, because in the canon patrick did indeed do some wild shit but i think it's a stretch to say it was out of malice, except maybe towards eric lol
obviously there will be different views of these characters and this isn't meant to be gatekeep-y or anything, i'm just concerned with how certain portrayals can quickly slide into negative biases towards mental illness. i think if you're going on this route you might want to ask yourself why, and consider how it could make the mentally ill people within the fandom feel when they see their own symptoms portrayed by their peers as synonymous with being dishonest or manipulative
#og#not putting this in the tags because i'm kinda just spilling my thoughts onto a post#i just saw something about michael on another site and it really rubbed me the wrong way#i know a lot of this came from habit saying all that shit in GOODBYE to shaun#i just dont understand why people think habit was telling the truth#he did explicitly say he wanted to break shaun after all. and we all know how Honest And Reliable he was with vinny#like. in the series nothing points to michael being the secret cause of everyone's woes. i would argue it was implying otherwise#and i feel... sad that i sometimes see him being blindly characterized as a complete asshole or as Super Manipulative#like... i had to deal with most people in the fandom hating shaun not that long ago until it started to change for some reason#and frankly? id really rather not watch that same bullshit happen to poor michael. the guy was just trying his best....#i sometimes see this sort of thing from people who really like shaun and i just wanna say#you don't have to twist everything michael did into some terrible action just because you feel bad for shaun#like for starters there's plenty of times where they're both wrong. or miscommunicate. or where ones right but says it in a terrible way#and it's also like. yeah michael fucked up sometimes but you'd have to be high to think the same isn't true of them all#idk. im rambling and idk how to end these tags. ummmm. yeag
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fyi i swear something's going on w/ legend, neither he nor wars are emotionless i promise, they're both just mentally ill but in different ways. leg sees problem. ignores feelings. fixes problem. (can't fix the problem.) wars sees problem. saw problem wrong. realizes what he did. wants to take it back. (can't take it back.) Also if y'all are disappointed about their arcs, sorry? i guess? point isn't them though, the point is that it's an aftermath story. If i can stuff in more bonus themes within the theme then that's a huge plus (emotionally repressed explorer leg, wwI vet wars yeet)
anyhoo bear with me, Things are Happening. Setup is occurring. and Hylia fans I swear I won't insult her forever, she's actually pretty chill.
writing hard. halp
#chicken scratch#smoke & ashes#rant over lol#it's so hard to writeeeeeee rn#and i know what i need to do but it's the actual doing that's getting me#i think i'm gonna rewrite the prewritten bit to make it more cohesive#cuz right now it's an isolated scene and we don't need that shit#looking for unity here - no isolation allowed#ever think about how writing style/syntax/sequence of events impacts storytelling?#yea me too.#i think i very much failed to characterize the links early on so now i'm trying to make up for it#and like. idk. in this fandom at least i feel like characterizations can come and go in trends#i remember gay lil twink wars and now he's a valued member of society (which i like)#point is i should've nailed down concrete characterizations and then i didn't *dabs*#tbf i was a little baby man so there is that#i started this so long ago holy shit
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