#i've stayed up all night for this
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MAYBE ROMANCE IS A PLACE
#fontaines dc#grian chatten#OUGHHH#I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS ALBUM#POETS!!!#THE LOT OF THEM#haha The Lotts#do you get it?#its a fontaines dc reference#i've stayed up all night for this#also im shitfaced#ugj#fuck you new order for cancelling
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stillness in these waking hours
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#artists on tumblr#animated illustration#2d animation#backgrounds#digital art#animated gif#environment illustration#myillust#cozy#office#workspace#rain#gifs#this was inspired by how i've been having to stay up all night to get some stuff done and one day#i was just looking out the window and watched the sunrise through the grey rainy clouds c':#everything felt so quiet and still - it took a lot out of me to not animate more things in this one heh#i love how it turned out - the serene-ness and stillness of it all really captured the feeling i wanted to recreate :')#(also this isn't my irl workspace lol maybe the blinds and as usual this is just my character not me)#but i nonetheless hope you'll like this! <3 wishing you a lovely day or night ahead!
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watched over the garden wall today for the first time! I love u horror fantasy mystery genre
#over the garden wall#otgw#a friend and I were looking for a show similar to gravity falls to watch and I mentioned that I had heard of this one#I didn't realize it was so short! But I love it#I love you succinct shows I love you planned out endings#fan art#wirt and greg#otgw beatrice#the frog#can't remember his name#art#this is the first time in so long that I've felt good about art I've made :o#stayed up all night doing this#wouldn't have taken that long but photoshop crashed right when i was getting close to being done and I lost soooo much progress#it was devastating but I decided to start over and I am glad I did#anyway hope someone enjoys this!
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I read a hundred and twenty six chapters of space mystery and all I got was this stupid hyperfixation
#my art#fanart#time to orbit: unknown#ttou#not dinosaurs#but this used to be a fanart blog not a dinosaur blog#and I've never stayed up till 5am reading#until now#go read time to orbit:unknown#as long as your plans for tomorrow won't be upset by staying up all night
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LEASH CALLED YOU
PUPPY (RUINER) x F!Reader | 18+ Good dogs get rewards, and Puppy thinks you are the best prize to be found in this hovel. So, he takes you.
WARNINGS: smut | P-in-V, rough sex; D/s undertones; VERY HEAVY DUBCON!!; slight breathplay. female gendered anatomy. implied/referenced human trafficking, sex work. canon typical violence. implied threat of violence. loss of agency. obsessive behaviour. this is basically playing house with a psychopath who decides you're his. and he pretty much killed half the city and the guy who was kinda a god. or a king. or something. so like, what are you gonna do? say no? Pff. WORD COUNT: 7,4k imagine writing like, 7k for Some Guy after seeing one (1) gifset of him.
He finds you in South Rengkok.
Nestled amongst a conglomerate of seedy, black market shops in the red light district, you gaze out at the sea of people from a vaulted window in a seamy bordello. A voyeuristic view into the coquettish bedroom they placed you in—red satin sheets and pink, heart-shaped pillows. All dolled up and pretty.
The harsh light cuts shadows under your eyes and frames you in a heavy, oversaturated glow. You look like you're bathing in red. In blood.
The sight makes something curdle in his stomach. He isn't sure why. There's not much of a difference between you and the other workers—all locked up tight; enticing passersby to join in on the garish body auction set to take place soon—but where they see the dollar signs in this, dancing and swaying their hips, pressing their palms flat against the window plane and fluttering their lashes, all lovely and coy, at the men who press back, you sit. Motionless. A little doll.
You don't belong here, he thinks. You're something much too soft and fine, like silk in his hands, and much too delicate to be in this part of town that stinks like wet, oxidising metal and saltpetre.
The slip of your black, lacy kimono barely covers your skin. He tracks it. The shadows, the dips. The curves. His eyes fix on the protrusion of your collarbones beneath the moody fabric, pushed to the side, and hanging off your shoulder in what, he guesses, is meant to be enticing. Kittenish.
They dolled you up to skirt this line between sultry vixen and twee innocence. The sight of it does something to his guts. Has them rolling over each other in tandem with each heavy thud of his heart. It's the way you look that catches his attention, sure, but more than that, it's the look in your eyes.
They glow under the neon smear, hazy and drifting far away, turned inward. Lost.
And then you look up. Catch his gaze through the glass.
There's a moment when everything inside of him dims, quiets. Thoughts, missions. Reason, purpose. It falls under a thick blanket of whisper-soft snow. It's just him—something, nothing—and you. This little cosm of his own making.
You make a motion, then, as if to entice him inside but you hesitate, staring back at him instead. He knows the LED screen on his mask is doing something funny, voicing the thoughts he can't say, because your lips quirk slightly at the corners—bemusement, maybe; he's never been good at reading people—but then HER is husking out orders in his head, all biting witticism, and acerbic humour.
Later, Puppy, comes the clandestine whisper—hot oil down his nape—and he catches the warbled curiosity as it trickles through. Good Puppy’s get rewards. But there's work to do.
Work. Yes, work.
His helmet flashes. He catches the red flicker on the smeared reflection of the window. Garish red. Kill, kill, kill.
You see it, and you flinch.
Good, is the sudden thought. Good.
Puppy isn't sure about much—not anymore, and maybe not ever—but he knows this: he likes the way your eyes widen. Fear, undoubtedly. Round and doe-eyed as you take in the horrible words scribbled in neon.
Fright, dread. It looks good on you.
Pretty, pretty, pretty.
His hands shake. He thinks about how you'd feel under him. How he'd feel inside of you. And—
Purpose, he thinks. Purpose.
There's an emptiness inside of his heart. A hole left over from the remains of LITTLE BROTHER. The dream, the reason, turned into a ghost. Shrapnel in his chest.
He doesn't blame HER for his absence. For the machinations, the schemes. It all led somewhere in the end, even if that place was here. Alone. Stuck, now, with a gaping wound in his chest.
But—
Not for long, maybe.
It'll be an awkward fit—BROTHER was this unknowable, untouchable shadow that lingered in his peripheral vision; a driving force keeping him moving. The space carved inside Puppy for him feels like a cavernous chasm. You're so slight, so small, in comparison to that gaping void, that he wonders if you'll be enough to quench the hunger that brims up from those depths. Rapacious. Wanting.
It's different, of course. You are real. BROTHER was—
Not.
He satiated himself on artificial dreams and empty memories. Those spectral, hallucinatory feelings of desperation to save his younger brother carried him to the very end.
But BROTHER was always chimerical.
You are something he can touch. Have. Keep.
He sees the flash of uncertainty etched into the painted lines of your face as you look around the cesspit you've fallen into, and he knows that you, too, could be that for him. Purpose. Purpose. Purpose.
(His, his, HIS.)
The people wandering around, perusing the shops, stop and stare at you. At this little wisp, all shaken and terrified, and in need of saving. Needing him—
His hand clenches around the pipe.
You're too good for their eyes. For this place.
He'll kill them all, and come for you.
The room that houses his new target is in a penthouse on the better side of the city. Vaulted ceilings. Golden chandeliers. Crystalline glass in a mosaic of iridescent pastel. It looks blemishless, clean, in comparison to the hovel that is South Rengkok. It scrapes against the chalky insides of his skull as he slinks forward, and emerges from the shadows.
He makes his way through the levels, one by one, until all that remains behind him is a river of blood and a breadcrumb trail of dead bodies. Boss’ finest. It's all mostly just—
Cleanup.
A necessary evil, HER calls it, and so, he sees it through.
When he gets to the top, he hears noises. High-pitched, elongated. A sharp grunt.
He finds his target sitting down on a sprawling chaise, knees notched apart. A woman sits in his lap, hands pressed against his chest.
Both of them are naked. Their clothes are in a messy pile by the door.
Puppy watches for a moment. Enthralled, almost, by the sharp juxtaposition their bodies make, and then—
Confusion.
She looks just like you.
His meaty hands are tight around her waist, jerking her down with each sloppy cant of his wide hips. Dwarfing her frame in his bearish paws. She mewls into the room, the reecho of her synthetic moans daggers into his temple.
The pipe in his hand jerks with the rough spasm of his fingers.
Puppy doesn't care much for killing. Doesn't care much for anything at all, really, except for HER, BROTHER. The mission. His objectives.
Cold, they call him. Unfeeling.
He thinks, suddenly, of Wizard. About something he'd said back when Puppy didn't have a name.
You're—heh, you're a killing machine! It must feel so good, you know? To kill.
It doesn't. He feels nothing at all. Neither pity, nor guilt. Regret is an abstract concept in his mind; intangible. Unreachable.
He's—
Ambivalent, HER once supplied. You feel nothing, Puppy, because you are nothing.
Yes. Yes, he thinks. And yet—
There's a strange heat in his veins. A caustic feeling welling deep inside of his guts at the sight of them coupling. His hands on her body is an affront. An insult.
It makes him angry. Furious.
He'll kill him, he'll—
(Go, Puppy!)
In the man's hands, she looks soft. Delicate. Breakable.
Yes, so breakable. So—
She moans, then, and he jerks his chin up, catching her reflection in the marble pillar.
Ah, he thinks. Ah.
She isn't you.
He gets to work.
The success of his mission has HER offering a bleak congratulations in the back of his head. Job well done. He takes it all in, feeling a distinct thrum in his bones that is usually absent following his massacres. Its place, in the hollow gaps of his ribs, is strange. Foreign.
Excitement, he finds. How peculiar.
It offsets the adrenaline rush, the lingering anger coursing through his veins. Killing the Target, his companion who was entirely too similar to you, leaves him feeling satiated and starved at the same time. A paradoxical sensation that shouldn't exist together, but somehow found a way, a home, within the slurry of his chest.
He wants to find you. Has this pulsing need in the back of his head to make sure that the woman he killed wasn't really you. But you are contralateral to his current mission. His objective.
Almost pityingly, the route HER generates takes him right past you: a tantalising tease.
Puppy isn't sure what to call this. Madness, perhaps. Don't be stupid, Puppy, comes the choppy, mechanical whir in the back of his head. You are—human, after all.
The way it's said by HER has his hackles rising, but he doesn't have enough insight on the topic to pursue the strange cadence any further.
Indulge. You earned it.
Your face flashes before him—different, this time. Gone is the thick gold on the crease of your eyelids, the heavy red on your lips. You're barefaced. Gaunt. Your complexion reminds him of the bruised blue of the sky above. Midnight. Iridescent rainbows in an oil spill.
He wants to touch you. His hands shake.
A series of numbers flicker at the bottom. The price, he surmises, for you.
An auction. Right.
Tonight, HER supplies. He feels the clinical amusement in the back of his head. Oh, but Puppy—
To offset the generosity, HER pulls up the amount he carries on him. Cruel. Mocking. It's compared and contrasted. The difference is staggering. He can't afford you. Doesn't even come close to the asking price.
(Couldn't even afford the entrance fee.)
Sorry, Puppy—
The mechanised warble is pushed down before it can start.
That's fine, he reasons, dismissing it all. Dismissing HER.
He has no intention of paying for what's rightfully his, anyway.
The bordello—boasting some strange mix between classic geisha-sensualism and modern sex appeal (and somehow missing the mark for both)—appears closed for the night.
A fallacy, of course, as everyone is just inside. Squirrelled away with cheap vodka, cigars. Waiting their turn to cash in their victory tokens.
He looks at your window, shutters closed with a looping scrawl on neon pink that says be back soon~!, and makes his approach.
There's no plan for this. Not that he's ever really had any to begin with—most of what he does is driven by an endless need to fulfil someone else's objective through the brutal physicality he wields—but he makes an effort to go stealthier than usual.
He doesn't want to risk triggering a failsafe that will keep him away from you any longer than he needs to be.
Not that it matters—
These lowlives—some assemblage of Creeps, local gangsters, and general nobodies—are mere nuisances in the face of his ice-cold ire. His rage. Tearing through them is nothing. The fight they put up is flimsy. Tissue paper defences. He supposes they never really anticipated him showing up to reap his dues at an event that has been advertised for several weeks now (how he missed your face on those gaudy billboards hanging above the taverns in the red light district, he'll never know). A high-class event, they snicker from behind the thin doorways.
Politicians gambling away public funds to buy pretty prizes. Gangsters, pimps, all looking to pocket more flesh for their own abattoirs.
Killing them is insubstantial to this cleanup mission, he knows, but there's a thrum of vindictiveness that roars through his chest when they squeal, begging for forgiveness that they must know won't come.
(He's barely merciful on a good day.)
HER is a cheerleader in his ear, egging him on. Go, Puppy! Get your prize, Puppy! and he lets it fuel himself forward until he's covered in viscera and gore—a jaw bone breaks off, tacks on to the lip of his boot; blood drenches the sleeves of his leather jacket, stains his collar—and surrounded by pulpy, broken bodies. Alone.
It's quiet, now. The only sound is his heavy, ragged breath muffled by the mask covering his head. The harsh thud of his pulse cottons his ears, blotting out everything except the heady rush of blood raging in his veins.
HER watches with an alien sense of amusement that prickles in the back of his head. Wrongness permeates from their mirth as they take in the carnage spread out amongst the halls.
It all means nothing to him. A means to an end.
Nothing to them, either. To HER. This is a game.
The wet end of the pipe drags against the herringbone floor in a metallic squeal done to announce his presence from anyone unlucky enough to survive the brutal apathy of his initial assault. He hears nothing. Just the grind of rusting metal on wood. Porous. Hollow.
It all ends in a muted bloodbath. A bloodied trail of bodies leads right to your door.
Untouched, despite the garish horror painting the walls in rotting red. Congealed blood blackened under the thin oxygen in the room.
There's no movement from within, but he knows you're here. Can feel you through the wood. Catch the rabbiting of your heart. Your gasping breath.
With the hand not clutching the pipe, he reaches for the handle, turns. Locked. He expected it. You must have propped something up against the knob during the first onslaught of his fury. Smart.
But it's not enough to keep him out.
He pries open the door to your room with one hand, shattering the flimsy back of the vanity stool you jimmied beneath the handle. Cute. Resourceful. His heart pounds in his chest. He can't wait to have you.
Go, Puppy!
He takes a moment to shut the door behind him—no escape—before he slowly swivels his head toward you. Taking you in.
(Finally.)
You stare at him with that same look on your face as before. Terror, he reasons, and tries to piece it together on the men who looked at him as he cracked skulls open with the blunt end of his pipe, tore jugulars out with his bare hand. Fear, he thinks. They look at him with fear. Loathing.
But you're missing that one. There's no hatred on your face, no curses spat out even when he stalks forward with the same steady gait as always, the bloody end of his pipe leaving a macabre breadcrumb trail for anyone to follow.
There's a sea of dead bodies behind him. Businessmen. Lowlives. Commonfolk. The other girls. It didn't matter.
They were in the way.
All of them.
(The man, too, who came to collect you like a prize winner at a seedy casino. His head, in particular, is rendered into nothing but a pulpy mess of grey matter, tissue, blood, and bone.)
He thinks you might cry, but you don't. You stare. Owlish. Wary. Between the thick, brick wall—your cage—and him, there's nowhere for you to run. He slows at that, coming to a stop several paces away. Watching you back. Assessing. Calculating.
You're nervous. Shaken. He's under no disillusionment that you hadn’t heard the screams just outside of your door. Heard the thuds. The cracking of skulls. The breaking of bones. A bloodbath only several paces away. A massacre. Scary enough to you that it made you try to save yourself, to lock whatever it was that stalked the halls from getting to you.
How terrified you must have been.
Puppy doesn't feel much for anyone. Maybe the odd moment of sympathy for the inhabitants of his city, the ones who beg and plead for his help with the things they can't control, can't fight back against. He extends small mercies where he sees fit.
But for some odd, unfathomable reason, he has the sudden inkling to reach out. Pity. You're so pitiful to him. Poor thing. You poor, poor—
In a moment of pure absurdity, the words: are you good? flash across the curved plain of his mask, and you make a noise somewhere between a yelp and snort. Mangled in the back of your throat.
“Does it matter?”
And, oh—
Your voice does something to him. Turns his insides liquid. He's melting, he thinks. Burning up and turning to a heap of molten ore by your feet.
He tries to reign himself back in, forcing himself to focus. Focus. Puppy ponders your question for a moment before ultimately deciding that it doesn't.
(Or, rather, it does; but maybe not in the way you'd want it to.)
In the end, he gives you a shrug. Banal. Dismissive. It makes your brows furrow. A valley forms between them. Irritation bleeds through the flat apathy you forged.
There's a scoff. He thinks you look prettier like this—a feral, hissing cat. He wants you beneath him, clawing at his chest. Spitting curses in his name.
(Wants to try to tame you. Wants to fail.)
“Of course,” you hiss, hands fisting in the sheer fabric of your kimono. “You're no different from anyone else, are you?”
Puppy shakes his head in response. He isn't a good man. He's made of spare parts stitched together to create an amalgamation of likeness to some king he barely even knows. A megalomaniac. A madman.
In all honesty, there probably isn't much that separates him and the men who vied for your affection, paid for your attention. Threw coins toward an auction just for the possibility of taking you home.
But there is a difference.
Puppy will have you. This he is certain of.
There's nowhere for you to go. This city doesn't want you. Doesn't deserve you. He'll take you with him, chained at the wrist if he has to. Shackled. Caged.
You are so funny, Puppy, HER intones, amused. A puppy with a puppy.
Yes, he decides. His puppy. All his.
He found you first.
Puppy lets the pipe—drenched in blood, bone; in viscera that makes you recoil sharply with a flinch—fall to the floor with a metallic clang. With his hands free, soaked, he lifts them up, offering his palms to you.
It's not a peace offering, but he's seen what untamed cats can do when cornered. And while you're no match for his unfathomable physicality, he'd rather you didn't hurt yourself trying to maim him.
Still—
Mine, mine, mine flashes, lightspeed, across his visor. He gives you a moment to let the words, the meaning sink in.
—you’re his. With that ironclad notion comes the freedom to do whatever he wants.
Whenever he wants.
And then he moves.
The difference in your size is almost hideous. Grotesque. He towers above you—a looming mountain—and knows that it would take at least three of you side by side to even hope to match the width of him.
His hands, too, dwarf you.
It curls something noxious inside of his guts. A poison-soaked miasma that subsumes in his bloodstream, pulses in the base of his spine. A hunger. A heat. You're so small in comparison to him. So delicate. He could break you in two, shatter every bone in your body.
And there's not much you could ever hope to do to stop it.
He shudders at the thought, and knows he likes it more than he should.
Later, though. Soon. He wants your hands on his skin. Wants to see you come to terms with the vastitude of him, and watch as the realisation that you are well and truly his sinks in.
He reaches out, palms upward, and waits.
It doesn't take long.
(Well-trained, is the hiss. He ignores it, lest he claw his own skin off.)
You flick a scathing glare in his direction first, caustic and hateful, but you bend to his whims without a word. You touch him hesitantly, running the soft pads of your fingers over the metal of his hand, feeling the bumps. The groves in his circuitry.
Everyone so far has tried to chisel in his head. Galvanise him down into a mindless toy (HER makes a noise, he ignores it), but you seem to avoid his head. Touching the places on his arms not smeared with blood or gun oil, running down the thick wires in his artificial arm. The veins on his real one. The hair dusting his knuckles.
Then you spot the blood caked, dried and blackened, under his nails, and you recoil slightly. Pulling back. Dropping to his chest.
His breath whirs out in a deep tremble when you shiver at the muscles—hard iron, brass—that hums under your palms. It's tentative. Soft, almost. Exploratory as you navigate the newness of his body and this strange situation you've found yourself in.
There's a fractured look on your face that he can't quite place when you slide the cup of your hand over his beating heart.
(Surprise, maybe. You must have thought him a machine.)
You stay there for a moment, quiet. Pensive. Gaze inward as you mull something over, something he can't fathom, can't ascertain.
“You…” your voice comes out on a stilted breath after a brief silence. “You killed them all.”
It's not really a question. He grunts his affirmative, anyway, and reaches out to settle his hands on your hips. You jump when he touches you. Tense and angry in his arms, but you let him pull you in close. Are almost docile when he tucks his chin against your crown, lets his hands slide to the small of your back.
You make no move to pull away. He lets that notion marinate in the back of his head, bending reality to suit his whims when he decides that you must not want to. He hugs you tighter, nuzzling the top of your head when you shudder.
He's not sure where you're going with this particular line of thought. Doesn't, entirely, see why it matters much. Everyone is dead except him, you. The only two breathing in this disgusting bordello that reeks of thick, spicy incense and myrrh to hide the scent of sweat, stale cigarettes, and sex. Something plastic. Synthetic. Lubricant, he imagines. Latex.
Knowing that you spent an insurmountable time in this cesspool has anger spiking inside of him once more, but it's quelled, immediately, when remembers what the other men who lurked in these dilapidated corners look like now. Viscera, tissue, and bones are now all painting the cheap panelled walls in a deep maroon splatter.
(He'll burn it all down before he leaves tomorrow.)
He keeps you close, shackled. A parody of a lover's embrace.
Your hand drifts up, a slow crawl to the base of his neck. Puppy lifts his chin. The bright red question mark shading the room in an ethereal neon glow.
“You killed them,” you repeat, knuckles grazing the over-sensitive skin where his mask melds to flesh. “But you didn't kill me. Why?”
He feels the press against his jugular. A soft ache in his throat. It doesn't hurt, but he knows you want it to.
Puppy's puppy has fangs.
Puppy reaches up, snatching your wrist in his mechanical hand. Feels, instantly, the grind of delicate bone under harsh, unyielding metal.
You don't flinch.
“Why?”
Under the harsh edges of your anger, your feigned indifference, he catches sight of the look that drew him to you in the first place. Absolute despondency. A vacancy in the hollow of your eyes. Misery, maybe.
If he were someone else, he might have felt pity for you. Ripped from the arms of whatever birthed you into existence, thrown into this disgusting hovel, and now—
A pet for a pet.
Kept. Chained.
Puppy will keep you forever. He knows this just as sure as he knows his heart pulses in his chest. The sun rises. Falls. He'll take you with him, wherever he goes.
You're his.
A fine consolation prize you've found for yourself, HER quips, and he's content to ignore it for now. Their amusement is clinical, a kittenish scratch in the back of his head.
But he does agree. You're a fine prize, aren't you? His little treasure found in a trash heap.
His, his, his
all his, all his, all his—
(You look at the promises, the answers, flickering across the surface of his visor, and shudder—)
Puppy doesn't say anything when you lead him by the wrist to sit on your bed, simply opting to follow along with your demands for now. It's cute, he finds, the way you try to bully him around even when your hands shake, knees tremble.
He rests his forearms on his thighs, letting his hands dangle in the space between his spread knees—the picture of ease; the manufactured torpor of predator—and he waits. Watching, rapturously, as you flit in front of him. All soft and pensive as you look him over. Taking stock of the blood on his leather jacket. The stains on his pants. The flat surface of his mask, broken only by the protrusion of his nose.
Boss was a megalomaniac. A narcissist. Knowing that he's made in his image, his likeness (spare parts; a fractured failsafe), he can only assume you like what you see when you look at these scraps that make him whole.
Whatever you find, it shades the appraising glance in a hue of calculative decision—suddenly firm, now: wily.
“Okay,” you say, and bring your hands to the sash holding the sheer kimono in place. “I'll be yours—” his hands twitch; reaching for you already. You dance out of the way from his grasping knuckles with a scoff. “Only if you're mine, too.”
If he had a mouth, he might have grinned.
You seem content to take the lead after a noncommittal response to your demand of shared ownership (the idea alone of which has him thickening in his slacks), placing your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself before swinging your thigh over his lap, taking (what he hopes becomes) your rightful seat.
It places your barely covered centre right against his prominent bulge, sending an electric buzz down the base of his spine. The look when you feel him throb against you is equally as scathing as it is feverish, and nearly comes undone at your glare alone, panting harshly against your collarbones.
“Down boy,” you murmur silkily before dropping your cunt right over him.
Whiteout. Static. He sees nothing but blurry slashes of red, red, red—
His hands are bruising on your waist, and he's not sure if he's pulling you closer to him or pushing him away. Maybe both. Tugging, tugging, until he can feel the red-hot heat of you burning through the fabric of his trousers.
You can't kiss him so you pepper sweet, soft kisses against the column of his throat, teeth nipping the seam where metal meets flesh. Marking the column of his pale throat up with the brand of your claim. Your ownership.
A collar in red, black, yellow, and blue—
He doesn't have a mouth to claim you back, but his hands punch your flesh until it's pressed harshly against bone. Bursting blood vessels under your skin. It puddles there. He runs his fingers against the pool of blood that softens your skin, and understands, then, why the sting in his neck feels so fucking good.
He feels consumed. In a tailspin. You grind against him, and he sees stars.
Puppy can't think when you do that, and you seem to know this because you don't stop rolling your hips over his straining cock, pinched tight in his slacks. It's too much.
He wants you. Wants you. Wants you.
You pull back, and huff at the projection on his face.
“You're impatient,” you say, but you're slipping your hand inside the waistband of his pants in spite of your exasperation, fingers dancing over the soft skin of his groin.
It feels molten when you touch the base of his cock with your knuckle. Just a nudge. Just a press. He thinks he could come undone like this. Just like this. With your hands on him. Soft, dewy skin.
But he wants you pinned under him, taking him. Has thought about nothing except your knees spread, thighs open. Pussy bare to him. Full of him. Nothing but him. Him, him. It made him ache. Burn. A low grade fever in his guts at the enticing image of you beneath him. Pretty lips open, moaning. Eyes wide, doeish.
“You’re too—”
You start to say something, but he can't take this anymore. It's too soft. Too gentle. He wants you bent over. Wants to be inside of you already.
And so, he follows through.
You make a noise in the back of your throat when he gets his hands on the underside of your knees, and unceremoniously tips you back onto the velveteen sheets. The flimsy silk of your kimono spreads, unveiling the softness of your body. Your bare breasts, nipples pebbling under his stare.
With it haloed around you in an inky black spill over your arms, leaking from beneath your body, he thinks you look ethereal. Unreal. Otherworldly.
The slip covering your pussy is barely in the way. He can see dewy lips peeking out from the sliver of black nestled across your slit, wet and red. Red. Red—
“P–Puppy—!” You yelp when he tugs his trousers down with one hand, the other keeping your leg up, pinched tight on the underside of your knee. Spread open. Nearly bare.
He presses the heel of your foot where his neck meets shoulder, keeping it in place with a soft pat to your calf, before dropping his hand down to join the other in ripping the thin scrap of fabric keeping you from him. He's graced with another yelp, but it isn't in pain or distress, and he ignores it outright.
Mindless, it seems, in this pursuit to be inside of you as quickly as possible.
Your panties—if they could even be considered such a thing—are pushed deep into his back pocket. Saved for later.
And then he turns back to you. Spread open. Waiting and willing under him. The sight of you like this steals his breath from his lungs. Sparks embers in his guts that smoulder, billowing smoke through the hollow of his chest.
He tastes ash in the back of his throat. Wishes, suddenly, that he could quench it on the slick, hot taste of you—
Gripping himself in one hand, he presses the blunt head of his cock against your slit, glistening from your wetness in the jaundiced glow of the moody light above your head. He's glad he didn't cut the power to this shithole because the way you quiver beneath him as he rubs between your folds is nothing short of mesmerising.
You're wet. Soaked. All for him, even if you keep hissing out that this is just a bodily reaction to stimulus, don't be so full of yourself, you psychopath—
His hand drops. The flat side of his thumb pressed against your clit. You arch so prettily when he touches you like this, knees shaking, eyes fluttering. He presses harder, makes small circles against your sensitive flesh that have you whimpering. Whining.
“No more, no more, no more—”
He can feel the molten centre of you flutter around his weeping tip. Silken, inviting. He wants more. Knows that you want it just as bad, too.
Impatient now, he lifts his fingers from your clit, and wraps it tight around your thigh, gaining leverage before he slowly, agonizingly, begins to presses inside—just the tip, the first inch—but the way you wrap around him (all tight, wet silk) makes his mind grow fuzzy around the edges. Electricity rockets down his spine.
He thinks he blacks out for a second, short-circuiting at the white-hot pleasure of being inside of you, because when his eyes focus, he's pushed all the way inside, trembling above you.
You're whining his name with tears dripping down your temples, legs quivering around him, and he wonders if this is that version of heaven, the real one, he'd read about once.
It's too much. Not enough. He rolls back on his hunches to see the way you swallow him down to the base. Pulled taut, and far too pretty for what he's doing to you. Poor, pitiful thing. He'll ruin you, he's sure. Mess you up so badly, no one else would ever be able to touch you without thinking of him. Only him.
It's a thought that sends a thrill down his spine, and he rolls his hips just to watch you squirm. Builds up a sickeningly sweet momentum as he forces your body to acclimate to his girth, to the unyielding stretch of his cock. You're too tight around him, and he worries that the taut stretch might be too much for you, but it's passing. Temporal. He knows he doesn't really care. You'll take it all. All of him.
Nothing will tear him away from this pretty cunt of yours.
It flicks against a long dormant part inside of his hindbrain, and he pants for it. Chasing this feeling, this high.
The slow crawl within you isn't enough to satiate himself. His belly rumbles. His throat burns.
Puppy gives you no warning before he snaps his hips into you as hard as he can.
Your wet cries start the beginning notes of his new ascension, and he pounds into you harder. Faster. He fucks you like he's starved for it. Aching. Desperate. Belatedly, he thinks about your pleasure, about bringing you to the same highs the tight clutch of your pussy is bringing him, but he can't focus. Can't think. It's mindless, this lust. Turns him inside out and makes him greedy. Selfish.
He wants, wants—
Never, in all of his insignificant life, has he ever wanted something as much as this. As you. Pressed beneath him, mewling out his name as he forces himself inside of you, as deep as he can reach—
(and then deeper still because Puppy wants to crawl inside of you; want to nestle against your heart, tucked under the bracket of your ribs and with the way he fucks into you like this, bed whining in protest with each furious, sloppy snap of his hips, he just might make that dream a reality—)
—and fuck. Fuck.
Somewhere in the tangled web of his thoughts, all white-noise, static pleasure, he can hear HER utter things in secret under the heavy pants of his ragged breath (things like, you deserve this, Puppy; good boy, Puppy; treat your toy—kindly—Puppy), and it spurns him on. Makes him ache to drive those mechanised whispers out of his head, filling the space they leave behind with the sweet echo of your voice in ear.
Scream. For. Me flashes across the visor in bloody red, and he sees when it registers in your glossy, wet-eyed stare. Cuts through the haze of sex, the lashings of fear that still curl in the shaded valleys when you look at him, and digs its talons into tissue, bisecting the chemical slurry turning your thoughts to mush. There's a moment of clarity. Brief, ephemeral, because he's pressing in as deep as he can once more, grinding against some spot inside of you that makes your eyes roll, and your head drop.
My
Name
It flashes again, and finally—
Your pretty mouth drops open, spittle running down the corners as you struggle to keep up with his frantic, feverish pace, but nothing comes out—nothing he wants to hear, at least. Please, you beg, and he feels the plea like a punch to his gut.
You're so pretty when you beg.
But that's not what he wants.
Bad girl
It comes as a warbling flicker. Distorted in his anger.
You shudder under him, eyes widening when he drops his hands down to your throat, palm swallowing you whole from chin to sternum. For him, it's as gentle as he could be, but you gasp for breath, tears pebbling in the corner of your eyes. Hazy, murky, with fear and pleasure; the warring sensations separated only a hairline fracture, a thin sliver.
He shifts forward and has you take on more of his weight, stifling more air from your lungs, and making you feel the power flex of his massive body cocooning you entirely. No escape.
Your hands unfurl from the white-knuckled grip on the sheets, slamming against his shoulders as you try, futilely, to push him away. You're frenzied. Desperate.
Puppy finds it endlessly charming.
His hand lifts, offering a slight respite that you seize eagerly, greedily, gulping down wet, feverish lungfuls of air.
“Y–you bastard—”
He likes it when you cuss at him. A feral, hissing cat. He falls over you once more, shadowing you under his bulk, and pistons his hips into the apex of your thighs, feeling the slickness of your cunt drench his groin.
Angry, spitting thing. And yet—
You're so fucking wet for him.
You like this. The way he bends you mercilessly to his whims. Folds you in half.
His hand stays around your throat, feeling each breath and moan that reverberates up his arm. The other drops from your knee, falling to the black, iron headboard that grinds into the wall with each thrust. Centering himself. Gaining more leverage.
Puppy fucks you like this. Trapped beneath him—a tumulus over you—and unable to do much except take his cock however he decides to give it to you. And give it to you, he does—
(Mercilessly. Pounding you so hard, your breasts jerk, and your eyes flash vividly as you struggle to stay afloat in that equinox of pleasure-pain that rages over you.)
HER says he doesn't have a face, and maybe that's true. It might just be a flat mess of wires sutured to flesh. But
Puppy wants to devour you. Swallow you whole. Wants to taste the sweetness of your cunt on his tongue. Feel your lips on his. He wants to pry apart your chest and suckle from the marrow in your ribs.
He wants you.
Wants you. Wants you—
He's not entirely sure if he's human, but he breathes like you. Heaves. Gasps. Can feel the wet, molten clench of your pussy around the thickness of his cock as he spears you open. Pleasure blooms at the base of his spine. Punches through his groin. Bludgeons him. It makes his head feel heavy, fuzzy. Somnolent with the mindless drive ticking in the back that pushes him forward. Makes him want to imbue himself in whatever it was that made you. A pithy god of old. Stardust.
He wants to remake himself in your image. Spare parts just for you—
How romantic, Puppy.
“Fuck—!”
Your voice is saccharine in his ear. A velvet gust of smoke curls in the back of his head.
With his hand around your throat, he feels the words before he hears them. It sends a thrill down his spine—dancing fingers pressing tight to each vertebra as it splits open the ventricles housing his spinal fluid, letting it all leak out into his bloodstream.
It's ecstasy, maybe. Or the closest thing to it he could ever reach.
“What are you doing to me?” You slur the words out against his metal cheek, hushed and fractured. Raw. “It feels so—good—oh, Puppy—!”
He shifts his pelvis into the bracket of your thighs. The head of his cock rubbing over that spot inside of you that makes your eyes roll back, and your cunt squeeze him tight. A pretty box wrapped, velveteen, around him.
There's friction in the pit of his stomach. Tension in his groin. It pulls taut, feels heavy.
He's close. So, so close—
You seem to realise this, too, your eyes growing wide once more as he twitches inside of you, pressed deep. Cockhead nudging into your seal.
“No, no—”
Despite your protests, your body is tightening up, quivering under him.
He takes it as an invitation.
Puppy's hips stutter to a slow grind as he hits the apex of his pleasure, cock throbbing, spitting his release, deep inside of you.
Around him, beneath him, you tremble. Shake. He can feel the tremors of your own hastily reached climax when you squeeze his cock tight in a vice, undulating pulses that seem to rocket from the sensitive nerve endings around him all the way to his brainstem.
It's good. Too good.
He doesn't have any other ambition right now outside of burying himself inside of you over and over again.
He wonders how deep his spare parts go for a belated second, how much of himself was forged in Boss’ likeness, but dismisses it immediately. It's unimportant to him.
“You're awful,” you gasp sweetly in his ear. “Terrible. A terrible man—” And fuck. He wants to ruin you again.
Puppy pulls you close, pawing at you until you're situated in his arms. Manoeuvred around like a little doll. He finds you precious, really. So malleable. So soft. He presses you flat to the lumpy mattress and folds himself over you. Thick thigh strewn over your hip, pinning you down. An arm tucked under your nape, bent at the elbow to curl over your shoulder, fingers brushing your collarbones. Shackled.
This is new. Foreign. He's never felt this before—all soft edges; sickeningly sweet. Unable to help himself, he bears his weight down, arching above you. Staring, openly and unabashedly. Drinking you in.
He wants to crawl inside of you. Worm his way to the place where you burn.
You're stiff in his arms. Silent.
But that's fine. That's okay. He'll melt you eventually. Make you understand that Puppy is yours now, silly. All yours. And you're—
All his.
Just like you wanted.
He owns you. And in turn, is owned by you.
It's fitting, he finds, considering all his miserable existence was spent handing his leash off to whoever grabbed it quick enough. Their hands were rough. Indelicate. He takes your hand in his, knuckles bleached white from the quivering fist you've rolled them into, and pries your fingers loose. Threads his between the gaps before you can swat him away.
He can feel your pulse like this, pressed palm to palm. A precious little thing. So fleeting. A hummingbird in an ivory cage.
Poor thing.
“What—what are you going to do?” You rasp, voice hoarse from the grip he had on your neck. The sound of it—gritty sand, smoke—makes him shiver. He likes it, he finds. Wonders if you'll sound the same if he scraped your throat raw with the tips of his fingers.
His cock.
You huff when you feel him twitch against your hipbone—cock tacky from his cum, your wet cunt—but make no move to pull away.
He purrs.
Keep you, is projected and you suck in a sharp breath like you'd expected that. Then, he adds a heart. A red one. Mine.
“I'm not yours. I'm not anyone's—” he doesn't bother correcting you. You'll learn soon enough. “And you don't even know me. Why do you even want this? I could be a liability. I could kill you in your sleep—”
Could, not should, he notes, fondly.
Hahahaha passes by and you let out an aggrieved snarl at the sight. “You're so fucking horrible—!”
He nods in response, and presses the jut of his nose to your sweat-slicked hairline. Breathes you in. Amber. Humus. Loam. You smell like ozone. The streets after a heavy rainstorm.
You smell good. Like home.
“Do you even like me? Or am I just something to fuck?” is whispered so softly into the air that he might have missed it if he hadn't been trying to suffuse atoms.
He hears the fragility in your voice. The paper-thin foundation holding you aloft.
In all honesty, he doesn't know what he feels for you. It's all—
Abstract, perhaps. Grainy smears of feelings, sensation, all roiled around inside of him. Intangible.
He just knows he wants you. Has wanted you since he first saw you, sitting all pretty in a glass cage. Untouchable to anyone except the highest bidder in your upcoming auction.
(Spare parts. A pretty bird in a cage.)
What a pair you make.
He likes that, though. The way you fill this barren hole in his chest. Pilliating the listlessness that rolls like a marble inside of him. In turn, he wants to do the same. To stuff you full of him. So full, there's room for nothing else. No one else.
There are flickers of life buried deep within you that he longs to dredge up. He thinks you'd be beautiful with your hands wrapped around his pipe (disgusting, Puppy), and that, for him, is enough.
He's sure one day you'll feel the same.
Until then—
His fingers tighten around yours and you wince at the pressure before gasping when the metal gears in his joints begin locking in place. Stiffening. Shackled to him, now, until he decides to release you.
Goodnight flashes. He sees the words reflected in the glossy canyons of your eyes. Smeared red bleeding into the dawning realisation that you are his.
And no one else's.
There's no escape.
#Puppy (Ruiner) x Reader#Puppy x Reader#ruiner#huuuuu#imagine staying up all night writing unhinged smut for puppy from ruiner after seeing one gifset lmao#and doing it while the wips i've promised to finish weep from neglect in the background#am so tired and this is so so niche but i need to flex my smut skills for some upcoming fics and this was the best time to do it me thinks
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Sorry if this has already been asked before but why did the band break up? And did they break up on decent terms? Do they still talk to each other sometime?
It has been asked before, I just never answered jshfbdjcbh I'm still piecing everything together and stuff is changing or getting tweaked all the time, so I'm always super hesitant about answering these types of questions, afraid that people will take whatever I say as the final answer. So basically what I'm going to answer now will already contradict what I told some people already. And maybe in the future the story might go a little differently too (although I'm pretty satisfied with the current events)
Uhhh, get ready for a long info dump. I didn't expect I'd write this much...
Floyd basically stayed with the band for 8 years (from 14 till 22) and got pretty messed up in the process. The rest of the guys are all quite older than him so I guess I could say they were more responsible, or at least had a better understanding of their own limits (also they grew up in this kind of environment or grew up aware of it, while Floyd was oblivious and naive about all of it) and while they do get drunk and do drugs often, none of them are really dependent on them. They are also pretty good judges of character and know how to avoid trouble. Floyd on the other hand drove in with no breaks and constantly got himself in trouble that the rest (mostly Les) had to drag him out of. He also developed bipolar during this time (in my story Floyd constantly fluctuates between being saturated and being desaturated because of this) and his manic and depressive episodes started getting out of hand after his teenage years. (None of them are aware it's a mental disorder that's making him act so out of character.)
Floyd was becoming miserable because of this and all of his problems pilling up, and started blaming Les for the way he was. Les never argued this which only fueled Floyd to blame him more. In the end he was getting so frustrated and irritable that Floyd constantly tried starting arguments with him, even putting him down and getting aggressive at times because Les gets very unresponsive and closed off during personal conversations (guy is a giant onion of suppressed trauma that Floyd is hellbent on peeling open).
Eventually there was one fight too many, terrible things were said, some objects flew through the air, and Floyd walked out (or Hed kicked him out, I haven't decided yet) with the promise of going home and never seeing them again.
So, yeah, it was very messy and Floyd was the primary asshole, even though he's not really to blame either...
But Floyd didn't make it home (was too scared to sneak through Bergen Town to get to the tree (i don't think i can judge him for that either)) and he just returned to the reckless lifestyle, this time without anyone being there to keep him safe. So if he was messed up before, this is the time period where he got absolutely fucked up. This is also when he got heavily addicted to sour worms. And when he chronically slept around (half the time just to get offered free worms or have somewhere to sleep, other times because he was having manic episodes and was feeling hypersexual). (This is also potentially the period when he had the two eggs with that techno troll, but I'm still thinking if I want that to be canon to the story or not.) During this time he also grew to become very anxious and his self-confidence went to shit when he was being himself.
Then after about three years of that, he bumped into Les at some party. He wanted to dodge him out of shame but Les grabbed his arm and manhandled him outside to talk. Floyd felt like shit about the way they had split up and tried apologizing for all the stuff he had said and done to Les, but Les wasn't having any of that because he wasn't angry at Floyd, he was just worried about him. Les is also insanely empathetic like Floyd, and he knew that Floyd never really meant any of it, and that he was just looking for an outlet when he was hurting. Also he does think he is to blame for the way Floyd ended up.
Les wanted to know why he didn't go home like he had said (because that was the only reason Les had even let him walk out in the first place). A few exchanged words later and Floyd broke down telling him all the awful things he'd done, and Les promised to help him, feeling insanely guilty. Floyd wondered if he was allowed back in the band but Les made it clear that the band wasn't good for him and that he was never taking him back. Instead Les helped him go though rehab. I don't think trolls have those institutions (or at least not many are aware of them or how they work (I'm sorry but I refuse to believe the Trolls world has internet and cellphones, Mountrageons can keep that for themselves lol)), so it was more or less just Les finding Floyd a job and his own place to stay in the middle of bumfuck nowhere where he had no option but to detox, and constantly checking up on him to make sure he was doing okay. During this time they grew pretty close again. Or maybe the better term would be that Les slowly started putting his walls down again.
Hed needed a while to warm up to Floyd again. He's almost as protective of Les as Les is of him, and he resented Floyd for the way he had treated him.
Flea is pretty phlegmatic when it comes to any sort of arguing or drama. He was casual about seeing Floyd again, they were never super close anyway.
And Liv, she left the band when she and Hed broke up (haven't decided if that happened before or after Floyd left), so Floyd didn't get to see her again after bumping into Les at the party. And I haven't thought yet if they'd ever meet again somewhere later in life. But if they did, I think they'd both be happy to see each other.
Anyway...
Floyd managed to detox and successfully kept the job for about a year, but then he became manic again and messed it all up. After that he returned to his nomadic lifestyle, but he never fell as hard as those three years again. In my story Floyd's life is a constant cycle of getting his life together and fucking it up and booking to the next place. And he and Les are trapped in a never-ending cat and mouse game where they're both trying to fix each other.
So, uh, Les and Floyd are still very close and see each other somewhat often...
(sometimes monthly, sometimes yearly)
Yeah...
I am so fucking obsessed with them I'm gonna hurl. Please take this song before I combust:
youtube
#btw the status of Floyd's and Les's relationship is forever set on 'complicated'#but they are as obsessed with each other as i am obsessed with them#the song is too soft and vulnerable to be something les would sing out loud but inside he does feel it#papa roach is nu metal btw. tho idk where this song stands exactly#trolls#dreamworks trolls#ex bandmates#trolls floyd#trolls oc#les#answered#my art#btw I am only self educated on the bipolar disorder from what i've read and watched on the internet so have that in mind#my intention is to be respectful but i might not understand all of it. especially not the personal experience of those who have it#i'm just some random nerd#so in a way you could say floyd was diagnosed by a nonprofessional lol#i stayed up until 3am last night writing this#today i made the sketch that is no longer a sketch#should i put this post under a cut? it is pretty long#long post
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that "i wish that being aware of a mindset being ridiculous would make it easier to snap out of it" post hitting hard every single day
#talkys#parents: you are manipulating your friends into going out of their way to do nice things for you.#you need to give them a break from all your demands and stop asking for help and handouts.#me: dis isn't true i've exerted an equal amount of effort into friendships but in different ways. my friend driving hours to pick me up#and take me out of town and my other friend sometimes buying me gifts are equivalent to when i'd stay up all night#to edit every single one of their essays before they were due or listening to all their problems and giving them advice#dropping everything to be there for them etc. this is how friendships Work#also me: ohhh trueee everyone's going to get sick of my evil selfish ass soon :(#god the tags on the other post got too long but i forgot to add it sucks venting online too bc when ppl try to comfort me#im grateful but all i can think is oh my god im so horrible for painting my parents as villains when they arent.#what if people convince me to do a wrong selfish awful thing. im being ungrateful. im a liar. im blowing it out of proportion#its actually not that bad im just spoiled and unappreciative (+ then life will rightfully kick my ass)#i know many ppl who wish they were in my shoes. i might even be if i realize how insurmountable being alive is if i get to leave for a bit#delete later
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I'M SORRY I don't like to put something little mine with the great stories I love so much but *inhales* @somerandomdudelmao, @kathaynesart, are you okay with doing this???? *Puts you both in the "Bucket of suffering"*
#rottmnt#cass apocalyptic series#somerandomdudelmao#replica#kathaynesart#life of violence era#BUT WITHOUT jokes I JUST CAN'T DESCRIBE HOW MUCH EMOTIONS I GET FROM YOUR COMICS#THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU#I mean you're the reason I can stay up all night drawing something or wake up veeeery early just to look if there's an update#**** I'm being clingy again sorry#I've got enough powers and gotta speedrun animatic because I feel like after these 2 chapters I'll need to start something bigger...#Replica my sunshine I'm waiting for opportunity to catch this sparks of joy to do something for you
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Horrible new theory about Runaan's shirt today.
-no, not the new one, the one he lost-
He's still got his green assassin shirt here on the balcony, and vest too:
But by the time Gren is thrown into the dungeon a couple days later, it's missing.
Runaan's also sporting bags under his eyes because he'd been kept awake all night, enjoying Viren's frustrations about losing Harrow and also getting denied the crown of Katolis.
So. About that missing shirt.
I can't think of too many things worse for a guy who wears four shirts at once than to have them all taken off while he's badly hurt and manacled to the wall, and then be tickled half to death all night long, on his birthday.
#tdp theory#tdp angst#runaan#tw torture#tdp spoilers#i thought i was done getting horrible details about the dungeon torture but nooOOOoo#claudia looks guilty in the second pic too#she knows#imagining her chopping up a leaflynx and setting its ear fluff on a tray for her dad to use on his prisoner alongside other fun ingredients#okay gnight dad have fun torturing the elf. he deserves it!#and now she has to remember what she's done and she's not enjoying those memories#tbh i can see why she is drawn to aaravos#he tells her everything she's done was right and correct and she shouldn't feel guilty for any of it#WHEW what a relief huh terry it's all okay i've done nothing wrong ever in my life i'm golden#terry: babe i do love you but maybe let's try this one again#final thought: if runaan stays awake all night on his birthday it should be for sexier reasons than dungeon tickle torture okay#runaan was already broody but the man may never laugh again now
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While everyone else has been playing the new Dragon Age, I've been finally playing My Time At Sandrock; a couple hundred hours in and my builder Gloria finally married Logan!
#my time at sandrock#mtas builder#mtas logan#logan x builder#digital art#sketch#original character#Gloria#if i had a nickel for every time i drew an OC *almost* kissing a character from a video game...#don't ask how late i stayed up last night drawing this. i don't usually draw faces at those angles & had a hard time but was determined to-#-make it work.#btw i've been mostly posting my art lately on mastodon; though i just moved from mastodon.art to tenforward.social#but all my art there is tagged perseidipityArt so. yeah.
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if the 1k game is still open, I’d like to throw in my two cents!
Ghost (or Ghoap) with Forest and Only (allotted amount of time) to escape before (bad thing happens)
I’m sure there’s plenty of ways to go with that!~ please take your time and remember to drink water today!!!!!
~🦋
1k game here - no more please!
i will drink water just for you babe. also i did ghoap x reader & forest & trying to escape, but ended up not including an allotted amount of time, hope that's alright!
1.5k of ghost watching soap and reader run from him during a zombie apolocypse. except the apolocypse is really more of a background thing and i just throw in mentions of zombies. no smut! (cw for a very brief mention of cannibalism, a sprained then broken ankle, kidnapping, and very light puppyplay at the end)
"You fucking idiot, Johnny," you hiss. "You're gonna get us killed!"
"Me?" He snarls, whirling around to glare at you, hackles raised. "You're fuckin' shoutin' like you want the bastard to find us!"
"Shhh! Could you be any louder?!"
"You goddamned feartie, I hope he kills you first!"
"What the fuck did you just call me?!"
Ghost just barely manages to bite back a laugh at your offended tone, the way you're nearly spitting at Johnny, even at nearly a foot shorter than him. It's like watching a kitten try and fight a dog - cute, but you know the dog could crush the kitten if things went a little too far.
But Simon doesn't mind watching you hiss and spit at Johnny, certainly doesn't see a need to step in any time soon.
He hadn't expected to find much more than a few corpses when the motion sensor around his property triggered an alarm in his base. He figured it was probably a few zombies, easy enough to deal with.
But then he spotted the two of you - a big Scotsman and his far smaller girl, bickering playfully and totally unaware of him in the shadows.
Originally he'd planned to kill the two of you. He's got enough food stored to make it through the winter, so he wouldn't have to bother with freezing your bodies for later. It would be almost comically easy to kill you, take a couple shots from far enough away that you'd never see them coming, drag your bodies off his property, and forget all about you.
But then Johnny - who's name he only knows because you use it frequently - had spotted him. And wasn't that interesting? It's been a long time since someone managed to spot Ghost while he was trailing them.
He'd noticed Johnny's injury soon after that. The two of you had taken off running - he's not sure why, but apparently you haven't had the best experience with strangers - and Johnny had limped beside you, his right ankle clearly giving him trouble.
That was near sunrise. Now, there's an hour or two before the sunsets.
Simon would like to have the two of you in his base before night falls. No point in risking losing one of you to a zombie, not when you're already vulnerable.
He's been herding the two of you in the right direction since about noon. The two of you had picked the right direction to run, almost making it fully out of Ghost's territory before he started redirecting you. It was easy to land a few shots in the dirt in front of you, send the pair of you scrambling in another direction.
You're closer to his base than either of you realize. Ghost's muscles twitch at the realization, the thought of having the two of you locked up fueling his adrenaline.
He already knows you'll both put up a good fight. He can't wait to see which one of you gives in first. He thinks it might be Johnny, can already picture the man being good after seeing how Ghost might treat you.
He tunes back into your argument as the land becomes more familiar, unable to resist smirking as he sees the path that Johnny's about to walk.
"I told you we should've been more on the lookout for other people."
"Don't even start! Ye know as well as me that the bastard came out of nowhere, don't act like we woulda seen him anyway."
"Well, now we'll never know."
"Exactly! So why're you still naggin' me about it?"
"Oh, really, I'm nagging? Really, Johnny?"
"Yes! What, you think saying it twice makes it less true?"
"Oh, fuck you, honestly, I don't even know why I bother helping you."
Johnny laughs, loud and very obviously fake. "You're helpin' me? Oh, now you've really lost it, lass. I've been dragging dead weight since this whole thing started! You know, I'm getting awful tired of-"
Johnny's just a few steps away, make that final little stretch as he talks, and Ghost holds his breath, waits....
Bam. Before he can finish his complaint, he's yanked into the air. His bad ankle is wrapped up tight in rope, a trap tugging that leg into the air and leaving his torso resting on the ground.
He grunts loudly, though not as loudly as Ghost had expected with his injury.
"Holy shit!" You nearly shout, rushing to Johnny's side and abandoning your argument. "Fuck, are you alright?"
The Scot makes a half-wheezed sound of affirmation, eyes squeezed shut.
"Fuck, alright, don't move. I'll get you out, alright?"
Before you can figure out how to make that happen, Simon steps out of the treeline. You catch sight of him immediately, eyes going wide as you clearly fight the urge to run and abandon your partner. You just barely manage to stop yourself, shifting into what looks like it's meant to be a defensive possession.
Ghost tilts his head, smirks behind the mask. "Where do you think you're goin'?"
Johnny's face is twisted in pain, leaving you to respond. "We don't mean any harm, alright? Just... just let me get him down, and we'll go."
Simon slings his rifle off his back, holds it casually in his arms. The way your hands twitch, the panic streaking across Johnny's expression... fuck, it gets him hard.
"Why would I let you do that?"
There's a little furrow between your brows, and Johnny starts to really squirm in is bindings.
"We won't tell anyone about you," you try, inching around Johnny's prone form. "Promise. You let us go, you'll never have to see us again."
That, Simon thinks, is the problem.
He hauls his gun up, takes quick aim, and shoots the rope tying Johnny up before either of you can properly panic. You both still scream when the branch falls, clattering to the ground on top of Johnny.
You're quick to help him up, your argument apparently entirely forgotten as you let him lean most of his body weight on your shoulders.
Ghost slings the gun back over his shoulder, pulling a length of rope out of his pocket. "Both of you, on your knees. Hands behind your heads, eyes closed."
"Oy." Johnny tries to move in front of you, but his now mangled ankle has to be kept completely off the ground for him to even stay standing. "You can't... we'll go, like she said. Promise, mate."
"Knees."
He'd be lying if he said he wasn't disappointed neither of you put up even a bit of fight. But he doesn't complain as he watches you fall to the ground first, letting Johnny use you to help himself.
"Good," Simon hums when you both settle, forms stiff but in the correct position. "Either one of you even twitches, I'll break your legs and leave you for the zombies."
You both shudder at that, and Ghost feels his cock throb in his jeans. He adjusts himself, then steps forward with the rope.
He's quick, not giving either of you time to properly react. You both get a matching loop of rough rope tied around your necks, just tight enough that the skin is already rubbed a bit raw, just from the initial tie.
"Don't move," Simon growls when Johnny jerks away, gripping the man's wrists and tugging them in front of him. "You want to die out here? Watch your little girlfriend get eaten alive?"
He flushes, teeth gritted in what's probably a mix of rage and pain. Sweat drips down his face, streaking through the filth. "She's not my girl."
"Johnny," you hiss, shifting restlessly on your knees. "Seriously?"
"What? Yer not."
"Is that really what you want to be focusing on right now?"
"Oh, would ye rather talk about the goddamn collar and leashes the bastard's given us?"
Ghost gives said leash a rough tug for that, finishing off the loops around Johnny's wrist and moving in front of you. "The bastard's right here."
You sit still, eyes still closed and limbs loose as you let him move your arms around. Johnny's the one who starts squirming, scowl deepening. "Really? Couldnae tell."
"Lotta sass from a man wearing a leash." Ghost yanks it again, nearly sending Johnny sprawling to the ground. He just manages to catch himself on his bound hands, and Simon finishes off yours.
He steps back, holding the length of rope stretching from your necks in one hand. He tugs solidly, smirks when you both stand as quickly as you can. "Up, now. Time to go home."
He doesn't spare either of you a glance, turning around and starting the rest of the journey home. He shows a bit of kindness, keep his pace slow since he can hear the way Johnny's breathing grows more ragged, hear his limp against the dead leaves.
Neither of you tug or try to run away, and Ghost can't help but smile at the obedience. He mentally crosses leash training off his to-do list. He had been looking forward to that one, but he's sure there'll be plenty of other interesting experiences with the two of you.
He's never trained two pets at once. He can't wait to see how it goes.
#i've written this same thing in slightly different ways a million times. and i will write it again#1k celebration#ghoap x reader#bo writes#serial killer ghoap x reader#btw - he takes you home then chains you both up outside and says something like “this is where dogs stay” :/#dont worry youre perfectly safe (he has a high fence keeping zombie out) but he likes to hear how scared you get when you're out there all#you're both quite well behaved when he lets you in for dinner the next night <3#he only has to scold you once when you both complain about being made to eat while kneeling on the floor next to him#🦋 anon#zombie apocalypse ghoap x reader
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#yhs#yhs reboot#yhs coolment#coolment#yandere high school#samgladiator#yhs nova#yhs sam#yhs fanart#inkys bittersweet art#fanart#halloween#illustration#this is for an event over on discord i stayed up all night to draw#i've been wanting to draw nova anyway so this was the perfect opportunity to have fun#there are very specific reasons i chose the costumes i did... am i gonna tell? no lol
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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My first patient today made me so happy. She's this relatively young woman that I've seen a few times now who came in with this story of really debilitating, recurrent episodes of nausea and vomiting multiple times a week that were getting in the way of work and life and leaving her collapsed in the shower for hours a day. She had irritable bowel syndrome listed in her diagnoses, and was tearful for most of her first visit because she was so tired, stressed, and had basically been told repeatedly that she just had to lose weight. I was like, cool, weight can definitely be a goal for your long-term health but right now I'm more concerned about your immediate quality of life.
She's also had migraines with aura since she was a kid, worse the past few years.
Now, don't get me wrong: I did a thorough work-up to make sure that the nausea and vomiting weren't from some other underlying pathology. Thyroid, ultrasound, the words. Results were all pretty much perfect.
Anyway, started her on sumatriptan as an abortive medication for the migraines, it helped partially but not fully, so I nixed the sumatriptan and started her on daily venlafaxine as a preventative and stacked Nurtec on top as an abortive medication and she came back looking happy for the first time I've ever seen her. Like, every single other visit she's ended up crying in the office, not even out of active upset but just because she was so stressed and tearful at baseline. Also, guess what? No more debilitating nausea and vomiting.
I've started several people on antidepressants and one of the things I've been realizing fairly swiftly is that more than half the time I'm starting people on them, they do have depressive or anxious symptoms...but the main thing I'm gunning for is actually either migraines or chronic pain. And I get two birds with one stone: improved pain, and improved mood because, well, antidepressant, but also because not being in pain makes people happier.
Antidepressants woooooo
#personal#residency#dear diary#things I've used antidepressants for so far: migraines anxiety chronic pain helping someone quit smoking#love me a good SNRI/SSRI#love seeing someone's GAD-7 go from 20 to 7#medicine#anyway now I have to stay up as late as I can to switch to night shifts#which frankly is gonna be MAYBE 2 am because I've been going to bed at 9-10pm lately#due to my 6-8am work start times#RIPPPP#thank god my night shifts in the ED are all team B#(team A takes ambulance patients team B takes waiting room)
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#last night we got devastating news from the hospital#friday we took my grandpa to the er for a delirium and leg pain due to clotted veins to get some testing done and help him#turns out he has end stage lung cancer that spread through to his bones. doctors give him 4-8 weeks - tops#i felt guilty all weekend for setting all of rhis in motion while he preferred to stay at home (which he couldn't)#and then we got this diagnosis on top of it all. i've been an absolute wreck. i was wirh him at the er and visited him sunday and today#he's doing okay but he's depressed -has been for years- and it's been really tough fighting for someone who has given up years ago#i'm going home tomorrow. i need some time to rest and process to prepare for al that's to come#anyway. just wanted to update y'all after friday's post. i'm okay - all things considered. i just won't be as active out here as usual
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Alright, well. I'm supposed to be dead asleep right now, but I'm gonna put this here so I don't worry anyone—
I won't be active a lot for a few days. I won't say any details for privacy, but I will that my little cousin passed away yesterday, and theres more other traumatic reasons i don't want to share.
I shouldn't really have to say anything more on why I'm taking a small break. I thought I could push through it, but I can't.
You will definitely still see me be active or sometimes even respond, mainly because you guys are my favorite distraction.
And yeah, that's kinda it. See you guys in a few days.
#personal#this is also the reason why I've been staying up all night.#I've been spending most of my days in the hospital nect to him.#I'm fine#just need a break#a small one#to both move on and get my sleep schedule to be okay#or at least decent
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