#i've seen men try and get their non-citizen wives deported when they realise they don't like them (or try and kidnap kids overseas)

[maslows-pyramid-scheme]

I've spent years working with very vulnerable women, but I still forget just how easy it is for a man to destroy a woman's life: chip awag at her self-esteem until she doesn't trust herself; convince her to move (so he can get a better job and isolate her, so she can work part-time and be a housewife); inflict an unwanted pregnancy (he can support her, she can leave school/work); burden her with care responsibilities (he's working, but she's not working as much, she can care for the parents and the children, just like her mum, aunts, and older female friends)...

And, when she realises what he's done, what can she do about it? If he destroyed her self-esteem, she thinks she deserved it for being stupid, because that's what society says about women like her; if he convinced her to move, she'd need to organise somewhere to live when she moves back, and rent is expensive, and all her stuff came with her (even harder if she moved countries, has a work gap, and/or her parents live overseas and depend on his income); if she's pregnant, she needs to jump through 'oh, are you sure you want this?' hoops and pay for it (apparently, it costs around AUD$500 for the abortion pills) or maintain it (and know that it'll cost more to have a child, and chain her to him); if she has those care responsibilities, she can't just walk out on those she cares for (she'll be punishing them, and she'll potentially be punished in the courts)...