#i've missed a few lines but this is .... most of the speech. i don't even study this play i feel crazy

[justabunchofdragons]

whats he that wishes so? my cousin westmoreland? no, cuz i pray thee wish not one man more! if we are marked to die, we are enough to do our country loss.. but if to live! the fewer men, the greater share.. of honour :) god's will i pray thee wish not one man more... 🤭 rather, proclaim it westmoreland, through my host, that he which hath no stomach to this fight.. let him depart! his passport shall be made and crowns for convoy put into his purse. we would not Die in that man's company that fears his fellowship to die with us. by jove, i am not covetous for gold, nor care i who doth feed upon my cost but if it was a sin to covet honour then i am the most offending soul alive!!! this day is called the feast of crispian. he that outlives this day and comes safe home shall stand at tip toe when this day is named!! old men forget, yet all shall be forgot but he'll remember with advantages what FEATS he did that day. and our names, familiar in their mouths as household words - "harry, the king, (🤭) bedford and exeter, warwick and salisbury" - be in their flowing cups Freshly Remembered!! and then he shall strip his sleeve and show his scars and say "these wounds i had on crispins day :)" ne'er shall this day go by from this day to the Ending of the World, but we in it shall be remembered. we few 😇☺. we happy few, we band of brothers - for he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother! - be he ne'er so vile, this day shall gentle his condition! and gentlemen in england now abed shall think themselves ACCURSED they were not here, and hold their manhoods CHEAP whiles any speaks that fought with us, upon saint crispins day!!!!!! 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥👍

[bringthekaos]

are you gonna keep writing jayvik now that viktor is confirmed straight?

Gunna answer this one diplomatically, even though this ask was clearly sent with malice. Warning for Act 2 spoilers (and possible Act 3 spoilers, since the footage used in the "The Line" music video is most likely from Act 3).

First, when I continue to write Jayvik, it will probably have to be an AU anyway, because I have about 2% confidence that both of them make it out of this show alive.

Second: he is still not confirmed straight. He was depicted taking Sky's hands as she fades away for a second time. This means nothing, romantically. It means he regrets this is happening, he knows it's his fault, and he wishes to bring comfort to her in her last moments.

And that's if it even is her, and not a manifestation of his guilt, given that she doesn't look like herself at all in his hallucinations, or whatever it is. Her eyebrows are thinner in the hallucination, and her hair is wholly different: not as high on her head nor as tightly bundled or curly. This points to a suggestion that this manifestation is his best effort of representing her in his mind, and it is wrong because he didn't know her well at all.

Not to mention, in the very few interactions that they had (before Jayce's Progress Day Speech and when she asked him to walk home together), he was shown just... not receptive. It could have been read as disinterest because he is gay (which obviously many people did), or just that he has a very one-track mind on his research at the time, and isn't even cognizant of the missed social interaction. But either way, there was no foundation for connection, intimate or otherwise, between them. Certainly not enough for the heavy-handed and forced connection depicted in season 2.

THAT SAID, I am a very ship and let ship person. I have certainly fabricated ships from less. Hell, I've shipped characters that never even interacted in canon. And I have no problem with the SkyVik ship, given that his sexuality was never confirmed one way or the other. Honestly, if it had been built up better in the writing, there is potential there! Both of them being from Zaun, and clawing their way into the Academy, which as Jayce said has a success rate of 3%. But it is not groundbreaking or even remotely incorrect to say that this ship is fabricated (and not in a negative sense. It's just fact). There wasn't enough to support it. He brushed her off multiple times. And he only seems to give her the attention after she is dead, which again points to a motivation of guilt: he wishes he'd gotten to know her and her aspirations and dreams before her life was cut short by him. But it's too late.

And lastly, the thing everyone needs to understand is this: Jayce and Viktor were released in League in 2012, and Jayce was specifically built as the mirror to Viktor. It was honestly quite a poetic "formed from the rib" kind of release for Jayce, who came 7 months after Viktor. These two had no canon romantic involvements in that time beyond mere speculation, so naturally they had very queer undertones for almost ten years before Arcane came out. And I don't think it's much of a leap to be disappointed when the producers and distributors of the show decided that they couldn't make their show "too gay" for mainstream audiences. Especially when the pre-established League fanbase consisted of 87% men (source), and a lot of cishet men are threatened/disgusted by/afraid of gay men, yet fetishize lesbian sex. So yeah. The Jayvik shippers get understandably disappointed when their 10-year old ship gets no-homo'd at the finish line.

So to answer your original question. Yeah. I am probably gunna continue to write Jayvik. Yes, even if they're both "confirmed" straight. I will hit them both with the bi hammer. And I will tag my stuff accordingly, and "stay in my lane" so to speak, and everyone is welcome to block me if they don't wanna see it. I'm not gunna go around harassing SkyVik shippers, just as I have never harassed MelJayce shippers. And I'm sure this will be called "misogyny" by many who'd like to assign a moral high ground to their attempts at eradicating the JayVik ship. Trust me, if I could have my ship without disregarding two amazing women, I would do it. But I can't, because someone at the decision making table decided to give two characters who never had any romantic involvements in League the no homo treatment.

And of course, as always, the season is not over. Some of this could change. But my love of the JayVik ship won't. Block me if you don't like it.

For obvious reasons, anon is now off ✌️

[just-jordie-things]

omg i love the way u write jjk characters! i was reading ur work and had a scenario that i thought would be so fun to read from you if you like the idea! i was thinking abt if you got drunk with them at the school (like maybe all the students sneak to one persons dorm or something), how they would act drunk, how they would treat u, what would happen etc. my favs are toge and yuji but you could do whoever ofc!

ok idk if this is exactly what you were looking for but since i've wrtten a few fics now where drinking/partying was the theme, i'm gonna assign the jjk crews their party night roles lolol so enjoy

ITADORI YUUJI is the life of the party, obviously. he's the type to bring jello shots to the function and if no one wants them, he'll eat em all himself. he's the guy that you dare to do stuff as the night goes on. he's the guy that somehow, at the end of each party, is missing a shirt. did he go swimming? did someone spill on it? did he spill on it? (most likely) everyone laughs but no one really complains about it. he's always got a fun plan or game in mind to keep the night going, and everyone's happy to have him there.

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI is the shy-at-first guest. he's slow when he first gets there, and always claims he doesn't want to get too fucked up. he's got a never ending amount of excuses up his sleeve as to why he can't take that shot with you, or be your partner for beer pong. but give him an hour to warm up. he'll spend that time lining up a fire playlist and semi-mingling. the trick to getting him to loosen up? just a quick smoke first. don't jump on him with it, but if he sees a joint being passed around, he can't resist just a couple puffs. what's the harm, right? a couple puffs and he's giving in to whatever other party shenanigans come his way.

KUGISAKI NOBARA is in charge of the photography for the evening. everyone's instagrams and snapchat stories are well taken care of when she's around. in the early parts of the evening they're casual photos, fit checks, some candids of the laughing group as they play games or eat pizza. she's quite good with lighting and angles, and no one complains when she shoves her phone in their face. as the night goes on, she probably documents more than she should- toge drawing on yuuta's face while he's passed out, yuuji shirtless and covering himself in whipped cream on a dare- but it's always too funny to go through them the next day and delete half the evidence.

PANDA is the dancer. if he's drinking, he's dancing. it doesn't matter how many drinks are in his system. it doesn't matter if the music is particularly fun- or even playing. he's got too much excitement from hanging out with his friends and is down for a good time. he's also easy to coerce into pranking someone.

INUMAKI TOGE is the coercer of pranks. if someone passes out, he's always got a marker on him. he always has the best dares for truth or dare, and isn't afraid when others want to get their revenge. he's that class-clown energy at the party. sometimes it's annoying, but it's always undeniably funny. he definitely likes those tacky party favors from spencers. especially the big dick shaped syringes for taking shots. he's got a lot of sus 'party decorations'. but let's be real it's really fucking funny when he breaks out the newest one. also if he gets too drunk he will use his cursed speech for the sake of humor.

ZEN'IN MAKI is the bartender and general caretaker of the group. she's the best at mixed drinks and knows everyone's favorite, but always has something new to try. as the designated bartender she's also the one subtly making sure everyone is on a good track for the night. most of the time it just meant keeping an eye on yuuji and toge, reminding them to have some water every once in a while went a long way. and she's not afraid to cut you off if you're getting sloppy. i also think she'd roll the fattest, cleanest joints when she's not mixing drinks.

OKKOTSU YUUTA is the first to fall asleep. he's a good time, don't get me wrong. he loves the games and the dancing and the goofing around, but he's an overworked boy and... a bit of a lightweight. motherfucker takes two hits and is shaking his head the rest of the rotation. it's kinda cute that his eyes get all red after so little before he raids the snack table. maki knows he has a five drink limit before he either needs to drink water or rally or... as usual, he's slumped into the couch and snoozing away. it's a miracle that he can sleep so hard when the music is blasting and everyone has to yell to be heard- especially when it's itadori yelling. by the end of the night, someone's thrown a blanket over him, and toge's vandalized his face with permanent marker.

[tokiro07]

Undead Unluck ch.213 thoughts

[The End of the Beginning of the End]

(Contents: Criticism - pacing, praise - Fuuko's speech)

I'm so tempted to just say that this chapter should have been what I predicted last week, hit post, and never say anything again to anyone ever, but I feel like that would be doing a disservice to everyone involved, most notably myself, so I'm going to try to give this chapter a fair and partial evaluation to the best of my ability

As other readers have said over the course of this week, I feel that this chapter was, in and of itself, fine, it's just mistimed. What the Unchaste Arc (if you can even call it that...) needed was a capstone focusing on Kururu. I won't go over how that would have looked since I went into detail on it last week, but it's extremely evident that that's the missing piece here on the basis that she's still clearly an antagonist in this chapter

Kururu does not have a single line, but she spends the entire chapter picking a fight with Julia and baring her fangs (which I'm glad she still has, to be clear), so Fuuko's entire speech about how all of the Negators used to be enemies but are now friends rings somewhat hollow

Fuuko mentions that Kururu told her Soul was the actual villain for this arc, but a) we didn't see that conversation, and b) that doesn't mean that she's on friendly terms with the team now. And if she is on friendly terms, then why a) weren't we shown that? and b) is she attacking Julia???

It's one thing for background events to be handwaved by omake on twitter or the collected volumes, but in my opinion this is central to not only the themes of the current arc, but the story as a whole. And I know Tozuka knows that. I've said it many times, Tozuka has earned my trust that he knows how to tell this story, all of my expectations for future events come from precedents that he's established, so when something like this happens, I have to wonder what's going on behind the scenes

Shonen Jump just got a new editor-in-chief, so it's possible that someone higher up the chain wasn't happy with the flow of this arc either and just wanted the slate cleaned, but that's entirely speculation. If I'm right though, that could also explain why the Bunny arc got wrapped up in a single panel, as it likely wasn't going to be "action-focused enough" for whoever wasn't vibing with the idol battle

In my opinion, this should have been a three-event chapter, like when Yusai, Isshin XII and Sean were recruited, with a third being about wrapping up Kururu's arc, a third being about Bunny's adoption (a lighthearted bit of cutesy comedy) and finally Fuuko's speech about Remember

Nico crying over Fuuko accepting this new version of himself as the same man was easily the highlight of the chapter, as it drives home what value using Remember has. We already saw from Nico regaining and perfecting Unforgettable that the memories don't overwrite the current self, they integrate and inform a more completed self. I've talked about the Looping mechanic introducing a sort of "reverse character development," but that development is still half-baked without the cast fully understanding the lies that they've overcome

I doubt we'll get a full scene dedicated to every single character reconciling with their memories, but even just a few of them remembering what they've lost rather than just understanding that they were supposed to lose anything will really change the flavor of their interactions going forward. There's a world of difference between Rip hearing that he's killed people and knowing who he killed, and the ability to strive to be something more comes from experience, not hearsay

All of the bonds that Fuuko has now are strong, but Nico knows firsthand just how much there was for those bonds to overcome. He's not simply her friend who doesn't remember her, he's someone who has helped and hurt her more than he could ever atone for, and she still forgave him. The weight of their friendship as it is now is all the more apparent after Nico could recall the actions that put that friendship to the test. For Fuuko to come see him when he was essentially a new man, think to herself "yes, this is the same man who put me through that," and then decide that that man was, after all was said and done, her friend...well, I'd cry too in Nico's position

And I imagine that everyone else will be much the same. For Shen to remember he sacrificed Gina, for Mui to remember she personally killed Shen, for Billy to remember betraying the Union only to be forgiven...everyone has a past that has informed who they are now, they just don't realize how much of an impact that it's had

And that's why it's so important that Fuuko waited until everyone had joined up to use it. Juiz once said that Remember was meant to reunite old allies, but that's not what Fuuko is using it for. If she did, she wouldn't be teaming up with the friends she "doesn't know yet does know," she'd only be teaming up with the friends she knows, invalidating the lives and choices of those she doesn't

If she simply revived their memories right off the bat, they'd pick up exactly where they left off, for better or worse. Billy and Rip may still hold everyone at arm's length, Sean may still resent everyone for being more important than him, Shen may still be motivated by revenge, etc. And worst of all, not everyone would be friends. Everyone was on mostly good terms by the end of L100, but Under was still Under and the Union was still the Union, separate entities for all intents and purposes

Now? It's just the Union. Everyone knows everyone, everyone is friends with everyone, and everyone knows more about themselves than they did before. The selves they know yet don't know are important tools for becoming better than they've ever been, lessons that they wouldn't have been willing to learn the first time around but are now retroactively open to

Fuuko is no longer turning complete strangers back into her friends, she's reminding her friends where they came from, and showing them how important their decision to be her friends truly is

No one is fighting God because of what he did to them anymore. They're fighting God because they believe it's the right thing to do, because they believe in Fuuko's vision of a better world. That's not an opinion they would have if she had used Remember on them, as their past ego would likely subsume their present, like Victor trying to erase Andy to resume control of their shared body, but now Fuuko has allowed them a strong enough sense of self to unify past and present into one complete future

The sentiment behind this chapter really can't be understated, which unfortunately is what makes its timing all the more frustrating. The fact that the Union isn't even all together means that this speech isn't actually hyping up how major it will be when Remember finally does get used, we already got that when Fuuko shared her vision of a 25-seat Roundtable, and instead it feels like it's priming her to fail. Like we're so close to seeing that vision fulfilled, how's it going to go wrong?

And if that's not what happens, then the timing is still wrong for one very simple reason: KURURU'S STILL NOT ONBOARD!!!

Everyone agreed to using Remember all at once, except for Kururu, who was still throwing an oddly silent fit in the background! "The friends I don't know yet do know"??? Kururu doesn't have any god damn clue who any of you are!!! She's the one person here who hasn't had that rapport built up, the one who doesn't have a reason to help Fuuko achieve anything, and the one who's motivations could still end up being overwritten simply because she hasn't developed a firmly established and differentiated ego! Granted, it doesn't seem like this one is too different from the last one anyway, but that's exactly the problem!!! We don't know the difference between the two Kururus because she's the only character who hasn't been given the opportunity to explain herself to the audience!!!

I mean, I guess Bunny hasn't either, but again, she at least has the naivete and optimism of a child who was freshly adopted, so we can at least somewhat justify her lack of characterization

I really, truly, deeply hope that Kururu gets the Feng treatment, that her development is just being put off for a more opportune moment, because if she's just going to be reduced to a background gag, then I will be sorely disappointed

That said, my love for Kururu ironically skyrocketed after this chapter, because now the Kururu I created in my mind, the Kururu I don't know yet do know, has much less chance of being replaced by the "true" Kururu from Tozuka's. While obviously I'd prefer to know authorial intent, Tozuka has inadvertently set Kururu aside and left me the opportunity to say "my character now," which is an oddly powerful way to form an attachment between character and reader

I should know, it's exactly what Oda did with Monet

Anyway, I think that's enough venting for this week. Here's hoping that next week's chapter will leave a better taste in my mouth

Until next time, let's enjoy life!

[realmadridfamily]

Ana Galocha : "Being the wife of a footballer or a coach doesn't mean you stop existing"

She prioritizes the career of her partner, Davide Ancelotti, over her own. But her restlessness and creativity have helped her turn sport into a way of life and art into a form of expression, by the way: take note of the speech on how to behave on social media.

Art and sport are Ana Galocha's great passions. Accustomed to constant moving due to her husband's profession (Davide Ancelotti - second coach of Real Madrid), now that she has been settled in the capital for a few years, those hobbies are starting to become something more: sport, a way of life as an investment in search of a healthier future physically and mentally, art… well, for now, she has already had her first exhibition in Madrid (in April, at Oculto Hair Club) and that is already a big deal.

How did you experience your first exhibition?

Very positive. I was afraid to exhibit my paintings in a gallery, even though I show them on Instagram, where more people see them. But I was very surprised to see that I still have the same line, but I can still define myself better, I am still on the way.

Mickey Mouse was the protagonist of this exhibition, with messages such as "more love, less war" or "more listening, less talking". Do you want your paintings to be more than just a pretty picture, do you want them to say something?

Yes. I have paintings that are simply decorative, but… My paintings are a bit childish, but they carry a message, whether it's a critique or what I feel at the time. Even though there's a lot of color, there's always something behind it.

There is also a naive point.

Yes, it could be the definition of my style.

We noticed on your Instagram: you like to do sports and for you it's almost an investment in the future, in physical and mental health. Is that true?

The first reason I do sport, apart from the fact that I love it, is that in the future I don't want to feel like a dependent woman, because I lack strength or… No, I don't want to. I want, if I am dependent, to be because of something else that I can't control. Also mentally, I think sport could be my therapy, along with painting. But I need sport. And I like to feel safe: now that I'm approaching 40, seeing myself better in the mirror helps me feel safe.

You do everything: training, weights, climbing, boxing… Do you have a favorite sport?

My friend calls me hashtag because today I'm a hashtag for a painter, tomorrow for a climber, the next for a boxer… Since I'm a restless ass, I take what I like from everything.

And how do you get along with football?

Now I really like it because I know what a true fan feels. Because how I experience it, my life depends in one way or another on football, how I live with such passion, also with children, it is very funny.

Were you a football fan before you met Davide?

No. As a Sevillian, we are all Betis or Sevilla fans, and I consider myself a Sevilla fan. But since I've been with him, the team I support the most is the team he is in, I can't help it. Sevilla has taken a backseat.

You’ve spent most of the last few years traveling, following Davide in his work. Maybe the years spent in Madrid are the most stable for you?

Yes, especially because I was already living in Madrid when I met Davide, I had been here for six years. So I know the city very well and I have many friends from before and, in addition, I have had time to settle down again because I have been here for three years, it's a record. Since I've been with him, we've spent an average of a year and a half in each country. But now I have more time to settle down.

Do you miss that stability or do you enjoy the change?

I love changes. Davide is lucky because I don't cause him any problems when it comes to changes. Up until now I have always enjoyed very different countries, both in terms of cultural visits and living in a village or a city where everyone speaks German. I always put the team first, I look at Davide more than at myself.

Dramatic art and your first steps as a reporter. Are they definitely behind you?

I'm waiting for another train to catch, get on the wagon and go wherever I go. No, no, no, I love it. I wouldn't mind doing something again. I mean, I don't see myself capable of being an actress in a series, to be honest, I value the work of actors a lot and I'm way below that, but doing a commercial or doing something small or as a reporter, well, yes, why not. And don't propose anything else to me, I might also say yes. And don't propose anything else to me, I might also say yes.

How do you get along with social media?

I don't like to think of it as a job. I don't pretend to be an influencer, it's hard for me to upload content, and I have contradictions about what I should or shouldn't upload.

And with other users? Do you respond to them?

99% of the people who write to me do so with positive comments. And I try to answer everyone, as long as I can I will, even if it's with a little heart. It's true that recently someone judged me for being the wife of a coach, with ugly and sexist things about what I could upload or not. And I don't think it's right that someone would write something like that to me. Sometimes they answer you that "if you expose yourself on social media …". Yes, but for me that is no excuse, I don't go out on the street saying that I don't like your hair, so neither on social media. And even if you ask if you like my hair, there is also education. Ever since I was little I have hated "honesty" used as an excuse to say whatever you want. No, honesty doesn't mean that, to me it means something else. People who tell you what they think in a harmful way, and who exist on social media, I don't like at all. And I can't keep quiet there. And Davide supports me. Being the wife of a footballer or a coach doesn't mean you stop existing. Of course I have a filter and there are things I don't post, but not just being Davide's wife.

Like you say in one of your paintings, more rock and less reggaeton?

Yes, I'm more of a rock, instrumental, and house fan. But if I dance to some reggaeton songs, I'll dance to everything.

[sparkanonymous]

Dragons Rising: Season 2

I'm a little bit more nervous to watch season 2; I like watching things that make me feel happy, and from the brief spoilers I've gotten about this season, this is probably gonna be more sad than anything... But I'll try.

I will be continuing to work on the two pieces I was working on before, so check the bottom of this post if you want to see my progress! (This goes for my season 1 notes post, too, by the way.)

⚠️ Spoilers for episodes 1-5!

Divider by cafekitsune

Episode 1: The Blood Moon

New Jordana look, huh? I don't really like it right now, but I can grow to get used to it.

So are the lines on her face just... permanent?

Good to know Raz has night vision.

Jordana is clearly scared about all of this... I wonder how long it will take for her to switch sides.

The bad guys always seem too distracted, intentionally taking their time to get to their targets. I kinda understand why it was that way for the little phone video in the beginning of the episode, since it's such a cramped space to work with and the movements might cause motion sickness. But with every other fight? No.

Wow, Ryu grew up quite fast.

Fugidove? In 2024?

Holy fuck, the news reporter remembered Pixal? Most of the ninja didn't even remember her. Actually, practically nobody in Ninjago city. He's either a super fan, or the writers completely forgot that fact for this season.

Is Intelligent George a parody on someone? I can't tell.

Did Sora really have to spell that out? Did they just... not think that that people watching the second season had already watched the first? I feel like spelling it out like that will make people not want to go back and rewatch the first season to see what they missed.

Also, with how much bigger Ryu is, I would've thought more time had passed. The way Sora had said that line makes it sound like she just unlocked her true potential instead of it being like... a few months ago or something.

Okay, so now we're on the "Arin really wants elemental powers" thing. He seemed mostly fine with that last season. What changed?

Arin, if you're looking for someone to be talking about those still lost in the merge, why the hell would you watch a Youtuber who only wants to talk about the ninja to sell merch? There are plenty of people that you could talk to; the people you're currently around would be far better to talk to about this. I know that they don't have the solution right now, but they are far more likely to come up with one before a fucking Youtuber.

Sora and Arin are such good friends. Even if their interests are completely different, they still partake in the other's activities, especially when the other is looking blue.

Poor Frohicky, lol

Zane would have already heard and figured out these figures of speech back in like... season 1 or 2. But he's still cute. I like that Kai and Zane are playing the video game together.

The layout of this game makes me think of the TMNT arcade game. Nice touch.

Hm... so Lloyd's getting more visions... or he's having a nightmare... or both?

So... Zane and Sora are gonna get taken down. Is Arin going to rebel, betray them? Beatrix is clearly coming back, which I figured would happen after she disappeared into that merge-quake at the end of last season.

Wu watching over his nephew is nice, but... where's Garmadon? Sure, Wu is probably more iconic and a better teacher, but Garmadon is Lloyd's father. I want to see him again... would he have the same golden glow that Wu's ghost does, or would he have a purple glow or be a purple void?

Also, where's Nya? I don't think I've seen her at all this episode.

Why is Arin's voice so soft now? It's like he's constantly whispering into the mic?

Kreel not even denying that she tried to make their mech explode back in episode 1 lol

Wait is the junkyard ghost Wu?

Wow, that was a small investigation montage.

I like Ryu's teenage model over the baby one, but he reminds me a little too much of Toothless.

That old lady shaming those throwing away a good dragon... but not taking the dragon? Oh, come on; she would've totally tried to take Ryu back home with her. It's an old lady thing.

Oh my god, Arin stop self-pitying; this is not the time.

Arin, they will be proud of you; you're a ninja.

Lloyd's gonna have a heart attack.

Woah, the camera during this fight is really wobbly. It actually feels like Arin, Sora, and Ryu are in danger.

The actual panic in Lloyd's voice.

Give me the smoke guy's name. I need it. He's really cool.

Episode 2: Shattered Dreams

Wait, the writers of destiny are still a thing? I would've thought that they would have disbanded after it was proven that writing the future didn't actually mean anything.

Their idea of fun is bagels? Yeah, I can see it.

Wait, so their entire religion isn't completely founded on made up bullshit?

Lloyd, why would you drink that?

Sora, you sound like Raven Queen.

Arin, that's robot-ist. In front of Zane? Really?

Y'all are in broad daylight. So much for being ninja.

Everybody judging Sora's graffiti, including Zane lmao

Hitting Zane in the head with a non-magic teapot lmfao

The Gong of Shattering is such a terrible name.

Poor Arin, lol

Oh, no. This is Arin's undoing. He's gonna hit the gong in order to try and get an elemental power, he'll turn evil, and then fight beside Raz. I'm calling it now!

I really enjoy Percival's character now. He's learning, he's helping out, and he seems to be kinder than when he was under Beatrix's rule. I think the rebellion was good for him.

The Master Writer was so scared, he didn't even try to run. Wow. Anyone will let the bad guys overthrow them, huh.

Euphrasia should seriously train with the other ninja; she's far too weak to be looking after a kingdom alone. (Yes, I know that they're making all the ninja really bad at fighting to make it look like the smoke ninja is way stronger than them, but still.)

It's not called the Blood Moon for anything good. Is it ever?

You're supposed to be sneaky; that glowing green spinjitzu is not sneaky in any way.

Why did Euphrasia have to say that? She could have looked relieved instead of saying that terribly said "Thank goodness your okay!"

Zane, that doesn't answer shit. A written language can't look evil. That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard.

Should Euphrasia even be here to save the Master Writer? She's using a crutch. Actually, does literally everybody have to be here for this? Bigger groups are hard to be stealthy with, and most of them aren't really being useful. They should've picked three to go in while everyone else stays behind as back up.

So Raz was the reason the worms turned evil last season. Hm...

I'm still not over it. Why is Ryu here? It should've been Lloyd, Arin, and Zane; Lloyd because he needs to confirm his visions, Arin because he's really foreshadowing something, and Zane to confirm the stupid language thing. Euphrasia would've been a good choice to bring if she wasn't using a crutch. Everyone else is just... here for no fucking reason except to just listen to the Master Writer. They're not really hiding, so any of the wolf-masked characters could easily find them. They didn't bother animating anyone except Lloyd and Arin going up the wall; they all just kinda teleported. This is bothering me so bad. (Not everyone has to be here to listen. The three that would've gone could've spread the information off screen so it didn't become too repetitive.)

See, I fucking told you. Now Lloyd's having another panic attack.

Why did the gong only affect the wolf-masks? Is the detail I missed that they have to be wearing the wolf mask to be affected by the gong? That seems dumb.

Lmao Kai

Woah, Zane glitching.

Episode 3: Beyond the Phantasm Cave

Wait, where did Kai's mech come from?

Of course when Lloyd asks for an answer, the source dragons come.

Wow, that source dragon from season 1 is so convincing, he convinced the other source dragons within seconds.

Why wouldn't Sora believe Lloyd after all of this?

Aw, Kai checking on Wyldfyre.

Nya, you trained under Wu for how long? You would know that, yes. He would bring you guys somewhere based on half-understood dreams.

Why is Zane always the one to keep an eye on the ship? Ugh.

"Now it sounds like the rotor sneezed!" Lmao Lloyd

It's sweet that Sora and Arin are talking to each other about fond memories, but... why? This came out of nowhere, and they just arrived at their destination. The writing here feels a little clunky.

Aw, now they all have grappling hooks.

Wow it sure took those snake things a while to come out to try and kill them.

Uh oh, Kai's powers not working very well...

Is this like the future telling ice thing in the original series?

Sora that is quite clearly static. How the hell did you think that was Kai?

Oh man, it's all their worst fears...

Oh, shit... The Jaya thing I've seen fanart for.

Poor fucking Nya... this is foreshadowing.

They have airjitzu. They could take the jump a lot more carefully.

Episode 4: Force From The East

Ooh, finally! Back to Cole.

God, Geo and Cole are so fruity.

That was a mouthful of exposition. They could've had a mini flashback of that moment from last season when Cole left and followed Wu. Sure, Geo didn't see that, but this show has never shied away from showing other character's perspectives during flashback sequences told by another character.

Geo being worried about Cole.

They're such an artistic family.

Bonzle is gonna make Geo panic.

Kai and Nya working together is sweet.

Me, too, Arin. Me, too.

The dragon speaking English instead of using telepathy or whatever.

"Should we... ask them what they want?" "Sure. What do you want?" *Gets obliterated* Lmao

Geo's so silly.

Finally; Cole comes to the rescue!

Bonzle's hiding something... I'm not sure what just yet. But she knew that they could leave when they previously couldn't.

Why does Zane have a Frohicky plushie? I'm so confused.

Why isn't Cole surprised to see Zane?

"- why do you have a frog-man-doll?" "It is a long and barely comprehensible story." I love them.

So that's why I thought the Glacier reunion was so... weird and terrible. They're in the middle of a chase scene.

I like how Zane tries to decipher what the problem is by examining his face... I'm so normal about this pairing, I swear.

I like how this episode is split into the stuff that Lloyd and crew were doing and Cole and family were doing, but I focus on just the Cole and family stuff. Mostly just Cole and Geo. They're family is really sweet and care about one another so deeply. Fritz and Spitz need more to do, though; they're kinda just... kids in the middle of everything, but they seem to be as strong and fast as the rest of their family, so... idk

Episode 5: The Spell at the Waterfall

Ah, the Zane and Frohicky side of the plot.

I understand what Frohicky is trying to accomplish, but Zane has already gone to him if he has a problem with the things he's doing. That's just the kind of guy Zane is. This tactic might have worked better with Kai or Lloyd.

Zane whacking the bad guy with the stupid fucking doll lmao

Why wouldn't Bonzle have told them earlier? Lmao what a mouthful.

Oh, so that kinda makes sense... kinda. For Bonzle to know when the could leave. But she would've sensed that opening a long time ago, and probably would have looked more worried throughout the beginning of last episode.

See? The entire Cole and Geo family is artistic.

Bonzle met Master Wu?!

Kai and Nya are so epic.

So, wait. i thought Wu would have taken her to meet the ninja, but I guess not?

Aw, Cole and Geo getting emotional about Bonzle's story.

"This reminds of the old days. Count me in." "That's what I'm talking about." Ugh... I love them too much...

So is one of the source dragons helping Raz? Or am I going crazy?

Of course, there are some critics I have. But I'm liking this so far, even with how often Lloyd was getting panicked and the amount of foreshadowing to future episodes I was getting. Still a little nervous about what's coming, though...

Current Progress:

[tangents-within-tangents]

Aspec ✨Icons✨ part 2: Dana Scully (X-files)

(Missed ace week bc I overcomplicated things and it took me a hot sec to finish the sticker but whatever lol)

Listen, Special Agent Dana Catherine Scully is an icon as she is! She's badass, our Women in Stem queen, canonically immortal, and she is totally demi!

Mulder and Scully, the ultimate will-they-won't-they, right? Is it just coworkers respecting boundaries? Friends to lovers? The slowest of slow burns? Idk man listen to this speech:

Scully: Well it seems to me, that the best relationships, the ones that last, are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.

Come on, tell me that isn't the most demi thing you've ever heard!

I've seen fans read this as her just realizing or admitting that she has always loved Mulder but that's literally not what she says! And this is in 6.08, so after 6 years of working with Agent Foxy SMulder over here! And then they still don't even kiss until 7.04 and the first time it is implied they had sex is in 7.17 (which can I just say? is also followed directly by a scene of Mulder being heartbroken that Scully isn't interested in his crop circle slideshow, not exactly the peak of their relationship).

(As a demiromantic myself, also relate to this sentiment of "the best relationships." Like yeah we all have our preferences but I've always had this feeling of like a 'I actually understand real love better bc it's not sexual for me' type of a thing, which might be self-aggrandizing, but it's also the complete opposite of the allonormative 'sex is the ultimate goal of a relationship and the deepest act of love' bs)

A few episodes before (6.04) we also have this iconic moment:

Mulder: Hey Scully? Scully: Yes? Mulder: …I love you Scully: Oh brother *sigh*

Another main thing I think of is in season one when we have this whole 'you have to have a life outside of work and obviously that means dating' thing

But then the arc of the episode is that actually that ideal is clearly not her thing

She goes on the date (pretty sure the only one we ever see in the series?) and is bored and uncomfortable and happily leaves to go hunt the Jersey Devil with her loser coworker instead

Also fun fact I learned when researching all this, there was originally a boyfriend character for Scully in the pilot (added by the executives) who was completely cut. And when you look at how the creator talks about it, I think it's clear this ^ episode was a direct response to that

Chris Carter: There was some pressure early on in the development of the show to establish that the characters had personal lives outside of the FBI, and we wanted to see who they were dating, and I felt that was all wrong. I felt the stories needed to drive the characters, and their work needed to drive them. That their work was all-consuming and that they had no personal lives, that this was a quest. A romantic quest, in the literary sense.

And that's def reflected in the writing throughout the whole show lol

Mulder: So Scully, what are you doing tonight, any big plans? Scully: Well seeing as how it’s Friday I was thinking I could get some work in on that monograph I’m writing for the penology review.

Just some beautiful career-driven nerds who find fulfillment in life in other ways!

Which as demonstrated in the above clip, clearly applies to Mulder as well

Mulder: whAT'S a GIRL?

(aka one of my favorite lines lol and for the record he was going to meet his informant for alieum info)

Same episode as Scully's epic demi speech also gives us these gems:

Scully: Dating advice? From whom? Mulder: Yours truly. Scully: … Mulder: Hello? Scully you there? Scully: I heard you… Mulder, when was the last time you went on a date? Mulder: I will talk to you later *hangs up* Scully: The blind leading the blind.

Holman: I’ve been envious of men like you my whole life. Based on your physical bearing I assumed you were more experienced. I mean, you spend everyday with Agent Scully! A beautiful, enchanting woman! You mean you two have never uh…?

(yeah you and every allo fan, buddy)

Mulder: I’m perfectly happy with my friendship with Agent Scully.

So yeah, I'd def say Mulder is somewhere on the aro/ace spectrum too, even if on paper it's in the "obsessed with his work" kinda way. He's a bit more complicated, and I haven't seen the show recently enough to confidently be more specific, but friendly reminder that making dirty jokes and watching p*rn and such are not mutually exclusive with aspec identities (I'd even argue that it's further evidence for rather than against, since the show does specifically include references to p*rn activity, and not actual dating subplots or shots of one-night-stands like others shows would, so he's satisfying those things without someone else (we DON'T talk about that one vampire episode! fr so much of that was OOC I almost dropped the show lol)). And he also falls victim to the, ah... 'SA a man but play it for laughs and like it's his own personal failing somehow' trope ("trust me the man knows how to kiss" ma'am he was literally pushing you away -_-), the one in 'Syzygy' is far worse (link if you wanna subject yourself to it) but also so very ace:

Detective White: So what are you doing at my house? Mulder: I was hoping you could help me solve the mystery of the horny beast. *cuts to Mulder talking to an astrologer about satanic symbols*

Mulder: *panics trying to get her to leave* White: *literally shoves him onto the bed and pins him* maybe we can solve the mystery of the horny beast! Mulder: Maybe we should just watch some television (:

(poor guy just wanted to netflix and chill lit.)

And kinda random but one of my favorite things about Mulder and Scully's relationship is that Mulder so clearly appreciates her intelligence and who she is. Like these moments when he jokingly and respectfully flirts with her come at such specific moments, best demonstrated by this crack edit lol:

(credit to the creator, I just needed the specific clip)

Ignoring Bambi and Sheriff Hartwell la la la la! Except also I mean it can easily be aesthetic attraction, it happens, and neither of those actually went anywhere (Mulder literally sleeps on his couch and uses his bed as a storage room, he wasn't bringing anyone home). They both also have weird exes that show up (tho rarely) but demi means they can totally have had connections with others in the past (and since Scully is still so attached to that guy in 'All Things' after all these years I say it checks out).

(also available in demiro and demiaroace:)

For the record, there are 11 seasons and 2 movies of The X-Files, and while I have watched all of them, that was like 5 years ago (wow I'm old), so I'm not taking responsibility for every single line or scene that ever took place. But the overall vibe is very clear, and random stuff like 'Never Again' or whatever the heck was going on with Fowley (ugggh) are clearly the outliers.

No matter how you frame it, Mulder and Scully's relationship is clearly one based in connection, not attraction. There are actually lines in S1 that indicate both of them see the aesthetic appeal in the other ("I think it's remotely plausible that someone might think you're hot") that prove that's not what it's about for them. It's about mutual respect and admiration. About trust and being there for each other through hardship.

Their relationship is one with years of emotional intimacy before anything physical. I'd even say they dip into QPR territory for a few seasons

And the thing is! It's kinda actually canon. It's literally intentional! It may not be direct representation by name, but honestly now I'm pretty convinced that Chris Carter would have loved to have been aware of these terms/concepts! It may be unwitting, but it is pretty deliberate, which is so evident if you listen to how the creators and actors talk about their relationship in the bts featurettes:

Chris: I was adamant from the beginning that Mulder and Scully should not be romantically involved. (s1)

(this poor man fighting the amatonormativity in media since day one!)

Gillian: Their relationship is platonic and there is so much respect and so much trust and they will risk their lives for each other. (s4)

Sheila Larken: It sounds cliché to say that they're best friends. But they're best friends beyond what lovers could ever be.

Chris: Scully loves Mulder, and Mulder loves Scully. It's a wonderful romance, it's just not a sexual romance, it's not a physical romance. It is a caring, tender, respectful relationship. It's an ideal, I would never want to do anything to threaten it, to change it. (s5)

(oh my gosh do you hear this! ^ I'm not making this up, even Scully would believe me!)

Gillian: Those moments where there is that intimacy, where even just the touch of a hand can be the same as, you know, making love in another series.

They were meant to be platonic and then they slowly and naturally developed into something more (hopefully not just bc of outside pressure but we'll get to that), and for that it's not just your everyday slow burn, but a relationship that is so much more.

Even early on they are allowed to be so openly sweet and affectionate with each other and it's just so chill. In general, the show is just written so different. Like in literally the first episode we have this scene where Scully comes to Mulder's hotel room in the middle of the night and takes off her bathrobe in just her underwear (so Mulder can check the marks on her back) and Mulder does not react at all. He (and the cinematography) is 100% respectful and normal about it, and then is just worried about her. Like how many other shows wouldn't dangle that as bait or make some unfunny comments of like 'man can't control himself' or whatever?

They are allowed to genuinely care about each other and be so tender, to be there for each other without any romantic or sexual implications (for a long long canonical time).

(will never shut up bc this is the sweetest most heart wrenching comfort hug in television history and it's in s2)

(So many more not pictured bc it's like the whole show and you get the idea) And this is a dynamic that continues into their relationship even when it has become romantic (this is the scene for the cuddle moment above and just ahh). And like check out this screen time ratio:

And 4 minutes of the kissing video is actually bts or deleted scenes stuff that wasn't in the show (another fun fact, Gillian and David did an unscripted kiss on the lips in 4.17 that the writers intentionally cut to save for the right moment) and the majority of the on screen kisses are just adorable cheek and forehead kisses (my HEART!)

All this plus the way the show gives these big ol poetic monologues about human nature and the meaning of life (that never have anything to do with sex) all the time. Like in the very least, if you're aspec there's a good chance you'll enjoy watching the show.

Perfect segue @im-a-goddamn-cat because you know what is so funny about all of this? All this amazing ace love? The allos HATE it! They cannot handle it! They cannot fathom that Mulder and Scully were platonic and nothing more for so long. They see all those amazing platonically intimate moments as proof there must be sex. The word "ship" was literally invented for Mulder and Scully. They were the original (and oh boy turns out shipping was implicitly aphobic from the beginning!). Like it's seemingly so universal, it is everywhere:

(spoiler alert, none of those are valid, it literally included their first meeting!)

(like I love you xfiles abridged but...)

Scully's canonical reaction to watching allos' sexualized interpretation of her (horrified):

(It's okay babe, just NEVER go on ao3!)

It's one thing to ship or want them to be together, but it is always about the sex specifically and it so often dips into this aphobia. I swear people treat it like it's a crime that they didn't have sex for so long (or more often/explicitly). Like why bro? Why is that so important to you? Why does love have to equal sex, huh? Why is this the only possible option?

People literally hate Chris Carter for that amazing quote about their romance not being physical! They say he is delusional or doesn't understand his own characters, or was gaslighting fans, just read this article or these ridiculous comments on this reddit post (like reddit is it's own warning but someone even said he "doesn't know how babies are made") Like I may not agree with all of the man's writing choices, but he deserves better than that! Esp since it is clearly intentional and well thought out. He knew what he was doing, it just didn't fit the allotypical standards.

The world just wants them to have sex so bad and us aces are so content.

🖤💜 Mulder and Scully: baffling and frustrating allos since 1993 💜🖤

[bentosandbox]

don't block me for this bento lol but while yes i get that her being Huge is hyperbole, i just can't suspend my disbelief that her being tall for a typical IRL asian woman jives with her in-game quote about having trouble getting through doors. she's the only op (outside mudrock i guess) who even has such a line, while men bigger than her have no problems or worries about banging their heads off the supposed tiny doorframe. i'm just being nitpicky about environmental implications i guess lol like why does she have this problem that no one else seems to have. gacha be gacha c'est la vie

also, what was the right line hoshi said to bagpipe? this is the first i've heard of it being mistranslated? :o (thank you for your TL work btw you're one of the few bastions of sense in this wasteland)

you're welcome + all good dw i have a pretty high block threshold for better or worse

Yeah i get it! BUT here is my copium reasoning

184cm + horn height (if as long as her face + average face length = 20cm) + boot heel height (about 3cm) = 207cm which is just very slightly over average door height (here?) which is 205cm and my view is that just slightly missing a few cm is way more troublesome than going through a door that's obviously smaller than your height since you'll definitely know when to duck than having a perceived illusion that you can make it through without bending down a little and then BANG the rhodes door frame has a little hole or something

I mentioned it here in a little rant i did last july but i'll explain it more in detail below (i thought i did before somewhere. probably twitter but i can't find it so i'll just do another one here)

I'll do a more literal TL first

风笛: 那个......我的钱包和护照都丢在莱塔尼亚了。 Bagpipe: Um...I lost both my wallet and passport while I was in Leithanien. 星熊: ......我是不是该佩服你？ Hoshiguma: ...Should I be admiring you? 风笛: ——被炸得一点不剩了。 Bagpipe: ——They got blown up with not even a shred left. 星熊: 我确实该佩服你。 Hoshiguma: Indeed, I should be admiring you.

And 佩服 really does mean admire

'what's wrong then' But admire has like 2 main definitions

And whoever translated it went with the second definition instead of the first; it's not admire in the 'oooo you have an admirer' (someone who fancies you) way, it's admire in the 'wow i admire your tenacity to make your way all the way from Londinium to Lungmen even after almost getting blown to bits otw'

'what makes you so sure its that reading over the other' just read the context of the conversation + I'm well aware of my bias for the JP loc but like. it's because their TL track record is pretty good (esp with characterisation) so I sometimes check it to double confirm my readings, and they use 褒める here which is homeru for you weebs and for everyone else

So back to the lines, admire sounds strange in context, but the idea is that hoshi is so impressed by her tenacity that she goes 'wow should i praise you?' so I would use 'impress' here

Bagpipe: Um...I lost both my wallet and passport while I was in Leithanien. Hoshiguma: ...Should I be impressed? Bagpipe: ——They got blown up with not even a shred left. Hoshiguma: Yeah, I should be. (Or 'Yeah, that's pretty impressive.' to flow better but it loses the 'should' which I prefer because Hoshi has a tendency to be very passive in her speech)

also also sorry i need to get this out lol i know they want swire to be as bratty as possible or whatever but :\ aghdgfhfgffff as someone who also calls their dad 爸爸 with cantonese tones and not mandarin im just really fucking bummed ok the rep would have been cool it, also has the slightly childish vibe to it that 'daddy' has so (without the discord kitten vibes even /shrug) Yuxia calls her dad 爸 if anyone was wondering

bonus since i mentioned chen's op rec in that og post

insane that swire's oprec was the last of her batch and chen is the first of the batch after so theyre next to each other in the medal list

TL is fine for the most part but man this is some 'parents making you call them by their first name' level of americanization (they took out most of the 警司 especially the one in their 'first' meeting??naur way...)

[therichantsim]

Last night I got off the most disheartening phone call with a friend I've known since we were pre-teens and my ex-husband on three way. The friend is who introduced me to my ex-husband. We chatted it up for a good while.

⚠️⚠️Trigger warning⚠️⚠️

Anti-lgbtqia+ hate speech below the cut.

Then somehow the subject of gay and trans people came up. I thought I knew where my ex-husband stood because we used to talk about it when our kids were little. I thought he supported LGTBQIA+. The friend was getting sentimental, and my ex called him gay. Which was weird since my ex is very much in touch with his softer side and can be very expressive and passionate about his feelings. So, although I know it was a joke, I didn't think it was funny. The friend said [[his name redacted]] is not gay! I may be a lot of things but I ain't no [[explicit]]. I said, "even if you were gay, we would still have mad love for you." He again reiterates. "I ain't no muh fukkin' [[redacted]]" My ex says, "Bruh, chill out with all that. Gay people are cool." Then says, "I have gay family members and if my kids came out gay, I'd still love them anyway." Friend says "Nah nigga fuck that shit. I'd rather my son be dead then gay." My heart broke!! Then he proceeds to give a weak ass strawman argument as to they (whoever "they" is...) are trying to shove this agenda down our throats. I felt like I was teleported into a podcast full of hoteps and incels. I said, "I am pro LGBTQIA+ so I'm going to need you to shut the fuck up." Here is where it really took a turn for the worst. My ex-husband who I love dearly as a friend and co-parent partner says, "But I can't get with them trans muh fukkas. I gotta draw the line there." My heart was beating so fast at this point. I started pacing the floor. I mean I gave them the whole speech about using talking points of white supremist. Then old friend says, "Yo, Ant aren't you a Christian? How can you be for these people?" I gave him historical teaching points on how the same stuff they say about them they said about black people. I mean I went in. As a theologian and ordain minister I pulled out doctrine in Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek text. At one point they both said something about sounding like I went to college and like a black activist etc. COMPLETLY MISSING ALL THE FUCKING POINTS!!! I'm so disappointed in my ex-husband. However, the old friend I can go another decade without hearing from him again.

I talk to my ex at least twice a week. Sometimes with his current wife on the phone as well. We love them damn kids but we're also like I said, "good friends". We vacation together and everything, but now I don't know how to move forward knowing he's transphobic. Is this how white ally's feel when they have family members who are racist? He has called a few times and I ignored because I'm still upset. The kids say, "dad has been trying to reach you, why haven't you called him back?"

I'm sharing this because I don't know who else to have this kind of discussion with. I'm probably the most if not only progressive in my family. Everyone else is mostly indifferent because they have no skin in the fight and then there are the boomers so...🙄

[hekateinhell]

this is from a while ago but you mention on that poll about armand's love interests you have a few different ways you interpret the blood communion speech armand gives lestat about loving him. i'm curious what your takes are, if you don't mind sharing :) as a daniel/armand shipper, i've always read a lot into the fact daniel isn't name-dropped - as though he's an exception or what they have is something more than just love... though the out of universe explanation is probably just he was forgotten (also apologies if you answered this before and i missed it)

Actually, I know I talk about Lestat and Armand a lot and I've certainly spoken about that scene plenty, but I don't think I've broken down my various interpretations in post form before. I don't mind sharing but remember, you asked! ♥️

I have four basic interpretations, the first of which I use for meta purposes and the others for headcanons/fic as needed.

Interpretation 1: Armand does love Lestat the most. This is the canon read and the one I default to because it's quite literally in the text. I know with VC we tend to selectively 'read between the lines' (I'm guilty as hell), but there's also times where Anne meant exactly what she wrote and I do find it extremely consist with Armand's characterization up to this point.

I'm not saying it's necessarily a healthy love, or even a romantic one though! In my opinion, it's at least in part related to the fact that Lestat's almost always present when Armand's going through some of the most traumatic events in his life (neither of them exhibit anything close to a healthy attachment style). Because these are not two mutually exclusive things, I do tend to read them as having more of an all encompassing, soul-connection type of love. Both can be true.

From 'does anyone else know the size of your soul?' to 'in my wanderings, I always return to you' to 'I have loved you more than any being in all the world whom I’ve ever loved' -- Armand simply does not talk to or about anyone else like this in canon. The depth and intensity of Armand's love for Lestat has been a very persistent thread since TVL through to BC and it seems to be rooted in a genuine passion and appreciation for Lestat's character, flaws and all (because oh boy, can Armand list them all or what?).

I adore them as a ship, but this is not the scene in BC that has me kicking my little legs with glee (honestly, I find it tragic for all involved):

“Fool,” he said again. His voice was roughened now by emotion he couldn’t suppress. “I have always loved you,” he said. “I have loved you more than any being in all the world whom I’ve ever loved. I have loved you more than Louis. I have loved you more even than Marius. And you have never given me your love. I would be your most faithful counselor, if you allowed it. But you don’t. Your eyes pass over me as if I don’t exist. And so they always have.”

“I hate you as much as I have ever loved you,” he said. [...]. I understand the very definition of ‘hate’ when I think of you.” ~ Armand, BC

Like, it's heartbreaking! I don't want this like this! Your ask is related to Armand's POV and I've already posted at length how the text (and Anne) very clearly states that Lestat does, in fact, love Armand very much so I won't get into that further here, but... yeah, yikes. I want better for Armand, I want Louis. 🤧

I'm sad now.

Interpretation 2: Armand does not love Lestat more than Louis, Marius, (or Daniel). This seems to be the more popular read and I totally get why, and I can work with it in theory!

If Armand wanted to shock Lestat back to life and into reacting and doing something about the situation, throwing Louis's and Marius's names around seems like a decent bet. Loving Louis and Marius deeply is something that Lestat can understand, it's something he and Armand have in common; it's yet another thing that bonds them together for better or worse.

Daniel isn't anyone particularly special to Lestat, what would be the point in Armand bringing him up at a time like this? He's a cunning guy, he's choosing his words carefully.

Interpretation 3: Armand's straight up traumatized and broken thinking Marius and Louis are dead and gone, and he's desperately trying to cling to Lestat for dear life because he's the only one he has left (channel Anne and forget about Daniel for a second here). Unfortunately, all their issues that have been festering and compounding since 1791 rear their ugly head and explode rather spectacularly.

What you get is a combination of 'I love you more than anyone; I hate you more than anyone.'

RIP.

Interpretation 4: Armand loves Daniel most of all. And I think I typically tie it into the second one. Yes, Armand loves Daniel more than Lestat, Louis, and Marius. No, he's not going mention him to Lestat for reasons listed above and/or he's not going to downplay his love for Daniel like that. He's a gentleman!

Bonus Interpretation 5: Anne forgot Daniel, plain and simple; I waste years of my life.

All that being said, I don't think Armand walks around with a hierarchy in his head of everyone he loves. He obviously has an abundance of love to give and he loves so fiercely! Pick your read and run with it, I sure do ;)

[love-little-lotte]

The Characters From Poldark: An Overview

After making that last Poldark post a month ago, I started reading Winston Graham's books. Needless to say, I got obsessed. I've just finished The Angry Tide a few days ago and started reading The Stranger from the Sea immediately right after. I'm still in the middle, but I'm kind of missing the vibe of the first seven books. Maybe it's because I'm already familiar with the story, thanks to the TV show. But I'm loving Jeremy and Clowance so far!

The Poldark books are like a drug to me; even if I'm dead tired after work, I try to find the time to read even a chapter or two before going to sleep. It's that addicting! Graham's writing was too good. I love his prose and how he gets the time period and characters. In more ways than one, the characters are much more lovable in the novel than in the TV show (don't get me wrong, I still like the BBC show!) The Poldark books can be fairytale-like, but so much grittier and darker. As the books progress, the story gets more political, which can be confusing, especially if you're not familiar with the history. Sometimes, I have to research a little bit to understand the background (especially in The Stranger from the Sea where they talk a lot about King George's madness, as well as Napoleon).

In this post, I share some of my thoughts about some of the Poldark characters (both in the TV show and books). This is not exactly like a review or in-depth analysis, just some rambles that came to me while reading the books or watching the show. If you haven't finished the books or show, be aware that I'll be talking about spoilers!

Ross Poldark

The most problematic man ever. Okay, maybe not, but there are so many times I want to throw my Kindle out the window every time he says or does something stupid (almost always at the expense of Demelza). Ross is not as annoying in the books as he was in the TV show, thankfully. Imagine my surprise when I realized he didn't say that crappy line about "playing the scullery maid" to Elizabeth at that Christmas party in Season 2. His apology to Demelza after spending that night with Elizabeth in the books was also much more sincere. And I love that he actually said, "I'm sorry" because (remind me if I'm wrong) he never said so in the show. Yes, we know he regretted it but I never felt he was sorry because he never really expressed it.

Nevertheless, Ross is still a pretty good character, albeit flawed. I like the way he fights for what he believes in and goes above and beyond for those less fortunate. His passion for his people—not only restricted to his miners or employees—is something to be admired at. He's not a good husband, but he's a decent person. He tries to be the hero all the time, but alas, he can't have it all.

And yes, I admit that maybe I can't truly hate Ross because I love Aidan Turner and his portrayal of the character. After reading the books, I've really come to appreciate Turner's performance even more. He just gets the brooding, tortured side of Ross.

My Favorite Ross Moment: Is there? Just kidding; he did have some good moments. You might think my favorite moment is a Ross/Demelza scene (I still honestly think about the stocking scene at random times of the day), but it's actually his impassioned speech during his trial in Season 2. Turner was on fire in this episode and really brought out the best of Ross.

Demelza Poldark

A ray of sunshine. The heart and soul of Nampara (hell, the rest of Cornwall). My favorite character. Demelza gets a lot of bad luck in the course of the series, but she always perseveres. She never fails to look at the bright things in life, and I admire her so much for that. Demelza and Ross's marriage suffers a lot in the show and books, but I've never once doubted their relationship. They're the perfect match for each other. Beyond the romance, she's also an understanding friend, a kind sister, and a warm mother.

Her personality in the show didn't wasn't really that different in the books, in my opinion, so I love both interpretations. Maybe the only change that ticked me off was her affair with Hugh Armitage. The show implied that she only slept with Hugh because Prudie told her that she saw Ross kiss Elizabeth at the church, but in the books, I feel like she didn't mind the kiss that much. Instead, she has an affair with Hugh because she wants to and has true affection for Hugh. I hated the fact that the show had to resort to a petty love triangle or jealousy for that to happen. Maybe it draws in more viewers, but honestly, it's a little shallow.

Eleanor Tomlinson was wonderful as Demelza. I've said before that they mixed up the hair color of the women in Poldark (in the books, Demelza is dark-haired, Elizabeth is blonde, and Caroline is a redhead), and I tried to imagine Tomlinson playing Caroline, but I simply couldn't. She's ingrained in my brain as Demelza now.

My Favorite Demelza Moment: Where to begin?! When she helped Verity and Andrew find each other again? When she tried to help Pascoe's bank when they were having problems? Or perhaps when she punched Ross after spending the night with Elizabeth. All these are great, but my personal favorite Demelza moment is when she sang "I'd Pluck a Fair Rose" at the Christmas dinner in Season 1. I know, this seems a bit minor, but I thought this was the beginning of Demelza's transformation as the Mistress of Nampara, gaining her confidence, as well as Ross's love. (And yes, I have this song on repeat on Spotify.)

George Warleggan

Debbie Horsfield gets a lot of flack for this adaptation (or so I've read in comments, from Reddit to Tumblr), but one of the changes she made that I liked was George's character. In the books, he's a scheming villain who will stop at nothing to destroy Ross and everything he holds dear. You know, the average bad guy. But I loved him in the show, though. Maybe it's because of Horsfield's writing, which humanized George, or Jack Farthing's nuanced performance. Farthing is actually one of my favorite actors in the show, all because he gave George so much heart, despite him being ruthless.

Also, I never really thought he loved Elizabeth in the books; instead, he only sees her as a prized possession, another trophy he gets for his status. But in the show, I can actually see his love for her. This is more apparent in Season 5 (which is not adapted from the books), but we can actually see his real feelings for Elizabeth in the earlier seasons as well! I've read that Books 8-12 focus more on the kids, but I do hope I get to see more of George and Ross's rivalry. It's a bit rundown, but I really love it when they have a little showdown.

My Favorite George Moment: His beef with Aunt Agatha is one of my favorite things in the show and books. So yes, my fave George moment was when he told Aunt Agatha that she's not 99, but 97. It's so petty and cruel of him—and Agatha was so right at retaliating by implying Valentine's not his son.

Elizabeth Warleggan

I've come to realize that many fans don't like Elizabeth. Yes, she's a thorn in Ross and Demelza's relationship, marries the villain George, leads on Ross while still being married to Francis, forces her cousin Morwenna to marry someone she doesn't love, and so on and on. But in the end, I can never really hate Elizabeth. She doesn't have a lot of scenes in the books, but in the show, Heida Reed played her as sympathetic and kind albeit weak. I never really questioned Elizabeth's actions because I always remind myself that this is probably what women in her status would do in the past. If you were widowed and broke, wouldn't you marry the first rich guy who proposes to you for your family's own good? Even if it's the guy who your first love hates the most.

After marrying George, she resented Ross and Demelza a lot... but, in her perspective, she was jilted by Ross. After they slept together, she postponed the wedding, (stupidly) hoping for Ross to come after her, but of course, he didn't. I can't blame her for waiting for him, though; that was Ross's fault for ignoring her. I do admit it was wrong of her to tell Ross about her feelings while married to Francis, though. And for forcing Morwenna to marry someone she doesn't love.

My Favorite Elizabeth Moment: In Season 3, when she swore in the Bible that Valentine is George's son (and in turn, making him swear that he won't suspect her anymore). Reed (and Farthing!) were incredible in that scene, but I just like how Elizabeth controlled the narrative in that moment. She's passive on most occasions, but she is determined to make George believe that Valentine is his son).

Francis Poldark

I was debating whether I should include Francis in this or not... After all, he's been dead for a long time, and I don't remember much what happened to him. And frankly, I don't really care much about his character (although his death is an important event for the other characters). I didn't hate Francis; however, he was just meh for the most part. In the first season, he suffered much with the responsibilities he earned after the death of his father, as well as losing his sister to a man whom he thought was a menace. Thankfully, his character had a change of heart in the second season.

I've got to say, though, that Kyle Soller is a terrific actor, and I missed him a lot in the later seasons.

My Favorite Francis Moment: When he came clean to Demelza about revealing the shareholders to George in Season 2... right before he died. I'm glad that he was able to redeem himself in the end.

Dwight Enys

Another one of my favorite characters! Just like Ross, Dwight cares so much for people and treats everyone fairly, no matter their station in life. He even tried to stay behind a prison camp because he wanted to take care of the people. But unlike Ross, Dwight is much more level-headed, gentler, and doesn't act on impulse... which makes me like him a bit more.

Luke Norris is also a very strong actor. He gets to show off his acting chops when he gets back from Paris and when his daughter Sarah dies (which is one of the saddest things that ever happened in this show). He also shared wonderful chemistry with Gabriella Wilde, who played Caroline. I like that their relationship was explored a lot in the series; they weren't just side characters that the writers put in random moments of the show, they were truly part of the show.

My Favorite Dwight Moment: Definitely not when he slept with a married woman. But he still gets a lot of good moments in the show, from being the voice of reason when Ross (stupidly) duels Adderley to helping George when mourning for Elizabeth. But my favorite one was when he stayed behind to warn Ross about the ambush, jeopardizing his elopement with Caroline. It's just one of the moments when we get to see Dwight being selfless.

Caroline Enys

I get that some people do not like Caroline; she's very brash, sarcastic, and, at times, spoiled. But she's one of my favorite characters in the show. Perhaps because she's the most modern one and I relate to her very much (although I am not an heiress... unfortunately). She doesn't show it a lot, but she cares so much for her family and friends. That's what makes her the best match for Dwight. They're somewhat like a reverse Ross and Demelza. And speaking of Ross, the book surprised me with how flirty they got with each other! She kisses him twice—and although there was no romance meant in that (if I remember correctly, that was when he went to save Dwight in Paris and she kissed him for luck and gratitude), she did once suggest that they sleep together. I'm sure that was one of her normal tactless quips, but even so, I was taken aback!

Still, I like Caroline more in the show because Gabriella Wilde was incredible in the role. She played the spoiled heiress so well, yes, but she gave her so much empathy and compassion in the show. Her heartbreaking scene when Sarah died destroyed me to bits, as well as the events after that. I'm so happy when she and Dwight reconciled. Also, I love that she became one of Demelza's most treasured friends. Their friendship is one of my favorite things in the show because they seem to just get each other, despite being two different people.

My Favorite Caroline Moment: When she paid off Ross's debts in secret. That was such a boss move and made me love her even more. There was absolutely no reason for her to do that, but only because she cared for Dwight and, as a result, Ross as well.

Drake Carne

The best man in the show? Well, yes! He's not perfect (he did run out of his own wedding, leaving poor Rosina heartbroken... yet again). Despite that, I like Drake, especially in the show. He's a bit annoying and more forward in the books, but in the show, he is gentler and kinder. And his hopeless devotion and unconditional love for Morwenna is so sweet. Their relationship is the only thing that makes Season 5 salvageable. Morwenna was damaged after her horrifying marriage to Osborne, and I liked that Drake didn't rush her into consummating their marriage. So far, they're still not in The Stranger from the Sea (will they make an appearance?! No, don't answer that; I hate spoilers), only that it was mentioned that they have a daughter. Beyond his romance with Morwenna, I love his brotherly relationship with Geoffrey Charles. He badly needed a good man in his life, and while his uncle is there (though I wouldn't say Ross is a good role model), I think Drake is the best guy for Geoffrey Charles.

Harry Richardson was also good as Drake; he's so charming in the role and easy to love. There are so many cases when I don't like new characters and actors that appear in the middle of the show, but he (and the rest of the new cast) effortlessly fit in with the rest.

My Favorite Drake Moment: Most of Season 5 Drake. Yes, that's not in the books, but I liked that the show explored the early days of their marriage. He was so gentle with Morwenna, it made my heart ache. The toad bit was stupid, to be honest, but it made me laugh with how it left George in a huff, so points to Drake for that anyway.

Sam Carne

Ah, Sam. He can be annoying at times, especially when he starts including his religious beliefs in literally every conversation, but... he grows on you. He's not one of my favorite characters, but I like his sibling relationship with Demelza and Drake. And his short-lived romance with Emma was pretty sad. It humanizes him in a way, making him see that he can't save everyone. Sam eventually marries Rosina. Which, to me, feels a bit weird. Sure, they do get along, but it just feels like they settled for each other because they were left by their respective partners.

Along with Harry Richardson, Tom York is also a fantastic addition to the cast. He doesn't get a lot of strong acting moments, but he's still a good actor and I enjoyed watching him.

My Favorite Sam Moment: Like I said, he doesn't get a lot of scenes, but I like Sam the best when he's being a Good Brother™ to Drake, especially in Seasons 3 and 4 when Morwenna is married to Osborne.

Morwenna Carne

I love Morwenna so much that it reminds me of that Stephanie Beatriz meme from Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Morwenna's been through a lot—more than maybe most of the characters in the show. She married one of the sickest, horrifying characters I've ever come across (against her will, might I add), but nevertheless, she endured. She's a strong character, despite her demure tendencies. As I mentioned before, Season 5 is still worth watching for Morwenna and Drake. How she overcame her trauma from Osborne's abuse was very compelling to watch; it's realistic and makes me like her more. I also liked how she got to have a closure with John Conan, her first son. I'm sure she doesn't want anything from her Osborne's family, but you can't convince me that she doesn't care for John Conan.

In the books, Morwenna's always described in the book as "plain-looking," which irks me to no end because Ellise Chappell is literally one of the prettiest actresses I've ever seen. She's also a pretty good actress, and she was able to show off her range in Seasons 4 and 5.

My Favorite Morwenna Moment: When she stood up for herself against Osborne, even threatening to hurt John Conan if he tried to touch her again. I remember watching that scene for the first time and just howling and clapping for Morwenna.

*****

I would've loved to write more about the other characters like Verity and Prudie (especially Prudie in the show), but... I don't have a lot of feelings about them. Plus, they don't really move the story along, unlike the characters mentioned.

So, there you have it! Excuse me while I start watching the show again. Bye!

[arguably-so]

Drive-thrus should have video options

Hear me out (joke intended).

I am a hard of hearing person who, very luckily, mostly has enough hearing to still understand speech and music (though I mishear a lot of things and miss large chunks of a song unless volumes are high or adjustments are made to the frequencies I can't hear as well). I don't often use hearing aids because I also have sensory issues, and most of the ones I've tried turn out to be very physically uncomfortable if worn for more than a few minutes at a time. Generally, I use lip-reading as a huge supplement to understanding speech, even with hearing aids (because hearing aids don't necessarily boost all the frequencies you've got trouble with), and as such, even the mask mandates were incredibly difficult for me, as they were for many, many other people with hearing difficulties.

Every single time I've had to use a drive-thru, either because I'm in a rush or because there's no parking or whatever the case, I've had to strain my ears desperately, sometimes even with hearing aids, to be able to hear them. "If only," I've thought to myself time after time, "I could see the mouths of the people on mic." Being able to read their lips would solve 90% of my issue, and definitely help a huge number of deaf and hard of hearing people in making a drive-thru more accessible. There's also, then, the potential of ASL being utilized in the drive-thru, which is currently 100% impossible to my knowledge.

Now, I realize how much more difficult that could make being a drive-thru operator. I also realize that, realistically, it's easier for most people with the same problem to just go inside the fast food place themselves and get their food that way. Issue is, this isn't always possible.

Not all drive-thrus actually have an indoor ordering counter. In fact, many, many restaurants are now going drive-thru only.

The drive-thru line goes faster. The entire point of a drive-thru is for people on the go. Most drive-thru restaurants focus more of their speed and effort on drive-thru goers, as dine-ins clearly have more time to stick around to wait. In this way, Deaf persons are effectively not allowed the same level of efficiency.

Parking is not always available. Sometimes, the drive-thru is the only realistic option if you need to otherwise park to be able to go inside.

Contact avoidance is sometimes a necessity. Be it because you caught a little cold, or because you've got a bigger underlying health issue, or because you've got social anxiety, it's reasonable to want to avoid anyone who might be a little too close indoors.

Fewer options. Regardless of reasoning, no matter how you look at it, this is a removal of options that hearing people get without a thought.

(these are not all of the reasons, just the ones I could think of off the top of my head)

Maybe there are these options in some places, but why are they so scarce if so? We have regular street crossing buttons that now beep and talk for the blind. Wouldn't a video option in a drive-thru be convenient for anyone with hearing losses? Especially after Covid, as Covid has caused inner ear damage in huge parts of the population, we should be making more normalized accommodations for those with hearing difficulties and Deaf persons, including and especially in the obtaining of basic necessities and things most of the population takes for granted.

Other Deaf/hard of hearing people, I would love your opinion on this.

[marylairre]

For the Character Ask Game

Lairre: 1; 4; 9; 14; 25 Ruth Evershed: 1; 2; 6; 10; 20

(You don't have to answer all those questions, BTW - feel free to pick and choose out of the 5 I asked for each one.)

So. I'm answering all of them. Because I love them. Thank you <3

LAIRRE

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

I love the narrative contrast of... how she is in the canon versus her deeply tragic roots. She's very much the 'I was dealt a shitty hand and it took ages but I chipped at the road and I've made the most of it' character. Plus, I love her snark which is absolutely a consequence of Nicola Walker's line delivery. Which, as we know, is always on point.

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

TV series, actually. I feel like... if you took monster of the week style adventures like Mythos and applied the usual over-arching narrative, you'd have struck gold, probably.

9. Could you be roommates with this character?

Fuck no, we'd be so bad for each other. I do dumb shit that'd annoy her, and her snark would probably make me cry at some point. I'm lowkey a sensitive little shit. We'd bump heads. I do think, long run we'd be okay, but not in a 24/7 living in the same space scenario.

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.

Day to day I always picture her dressing kind of like Cassie from Unforgotten but like... somewhat neater? Deep pockets are essential, got to keep that phone somewhere and with the size of phones these days... well. Let's not lose our enochian wards on accident. And I say deep pockets because I don't see Lairre as the purse carrying type.

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

It's a bit funny to answer this one because innitially I didn't really form an impression of her. I knew I liked her but I got lost in the storytelling because I was lacking context for a few things, but that lowkey fondness only got stronger over time. I absolutely love her now, and I miss her and I hope Julian Simpson brings her back again soon. That one little bit at the last episode of The Lovecraft Investigations was not enough :P

RUTH EVERSHED

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

*gestures wildly* have you seen her? Do I need to elaborate? She's, as someone else once said a dark-haired brilliant bitch. And she really is. She's so multifaceted and layered - starting out as always wanting to please, and quietly content just doing her thing to just wanting to protect those closest to her. Her character journey is... peak.

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

She rambles. She rambles on and on to the point of tripping up and I love that. It's such a small thing but it makes her human. Sod perfect speech, give me characters that think faster than their mouth moves.

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

The forever alone cat lady vibe is real. Always in love with older people out of reach. Love never quite happens. Content just doing my thing even if I'm the odd one out, it's how I like it. Also used to share her early series dress-sense when I was in my teens. Bohemian all the way, though, I'm more in my late series Ruth era where dress is concerned these days.

10. Could you be best friends with this character?

Given time and space to both of us for that to naturally happen? Probably. But we're both very watching this from a distance where strangers are concerned, bit odd on the social front, so us befriending and getting close would take luck and looooot of time.

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

I thought on this one long and hard because the thing is, of all the characters on the show, she's friends with a few of the long running ones and deep as that goes her ideal best friend, the one person who probably gets her best despite all the ups and downs of their turbulent relationship is Harry. In my eyes anyway. But as that is ship territory, I really enjoyed her easy friendship with Danny and I would have loved to have seen more of it. Zaf as well actually. So, tricky question that I fear I do not have a very definitive answer to.

[voidpunkanathema]

jasper

Why I like them: He turned out to be a much more complicated character than he seemed to be on the surface. It took me until his literal last scene in the game to realize this but damn if that scene didn't paint all of his actions in a new light. Like yeah he's still a bastard but you saw WHY he became the way he did. How easily it all could have been avoided. How he and Hendrik deserved the chance to move past the lies that poisoned their relationship without him having to be a ghost living in his armor. It hurt in a weird way. He became my first true character hyperfixation and honestly opened my mind to engaging with fiction in a whole new way. No one deserves to be painted in the Crying Lucifer Painting pose more than him lol 

Why I don’t: I will forever have a chip in my shoulder that he didn't get a redemption arc, sorrynotsorry. Even Party Chat tries to desperately downplay the significance of the armor scene if you check it on the now-memorial balcony. On a lighter note the fact I missed 99.9% of the Piers fandom is entirely his fault because I was too busy hyperfixating on him lol. Also, the classism. The classism is bad, mkay? :P

Favorite line: His melodramatic evil speech in the throne room where he lists love first as something he's given up on is hard to beat. Also his final line in the game being "we will never be apart again'...yeah 🥲😭

Favorite outfit: The evil queen ensemble. It's so...very.  Exactly the sort of thing a raging disaster gay that designs his own outfits (according to the character book) that's devoted himself to eeevil would wear. 

OTP: He literally only makes sense as a character if you assume he was extremely, painfully gay for Hendrik and sublimating it in a WEIRD way. And Hendrik certainly showed enough signs of feeling the same way (the way he clutches his necklace to his chest after his death in the first timeline...) Mordegon and Heliodor's toxic monarchy just got in the way... 

Brotp: Jade was apparently just as close to him as she was to Hendrik but the game NEVER EXPLORES THIS AT ALL. Also I think he and Sylvando could have been absolute terrors together lol. And I've always liked the headcanons where he and Mia bond over their shared pain and rage at their (perceived) abandonment. 

Head Canon: Quite a few, so I'll just share one that he wrote the MOST emo poetry as a pining teen, something he will never admit to on pain of death as an adult. I'll also bring up the fact he's successfully taken over the world but still paying for cake as proof he's not as happy as he thought he'd be and eating his feelings about it in Act 2 lol

Unpopular opinion: No one reads deeply enough into him, everyone takes the bullshit he tells himself at face value even when he directly contradicts himself *eyetwitch* I often suspected I was literally the only person right about him lol. Also, the Gay Armor Marriage was incredibly touching, but not enough. He shouldn't have died at all. Also while I've read Jasper/Sylvando fic and enjoyed it before I don't really ship him or Hendrik with Sylv myself which kinda feels like a minority take in this fandom 

A wish: At this point I can only hope he gets the Psaro treatment where his death is avoided entirely when the game is rereleased in like 25 years 

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I honestly don't want Square to revisit him, they treated him so harshly compared to other villains of the same caliber that pretty much got away with everything so yeah, just leave the angry wet cat man alone guys...

5 words to best describe them: Poor little meow meow supreme 💛

My nickname for them: Bastard son, the Purple Titty Monster (for Unbound obviously)

[onceandfutureoshainspector]

- oh, for fuck's sake, what in the goddamn are you doing here?

---- i gotta say, i'm very surprised at this. i think this is the first time i've seen Maxson outside of his Brooding Room, let alone this far from the Mothership. the fact that he's not surrounded by guards implies to me that he flew himself here, too. no backup, no witnesses, presumably nobody told where he was going - what the fuck is up with this??????

Maxson: How dare you betray the Brotherhood! Danse: It's not her fault. It's mine.

- ah, dagnabit. my process at the moment is that i play through a little chunk, making notes and taking screenshots, and then i type out the dialogue from the screenshots in the appropriate spaces in my notes (and format in html as i go because the sad fact is that that's less aggravating than trying to format with tumblr's rich text editor >_<). except now my xbox is being a shit, and i've apparently missed a few lines of dialogue, after i've overwritten the file saved before this conversation. i'm so mad.

- physically placing myself between my grandson and this lunatic.

Maxson: [missed line? screenshot unclear] Cat: He's not a "thing". He's one of your best men. Maxson: Have you taken leave of your senses? Danse isn't a man, it's a machine... an automaton created by the Institute! It wasn't born from the womb of a loving mother, it was grown within the cold confines of a laboratory! Flesh is flesh! Machine is machine! The two were never meant to intertwine! By attempting to play God, the Institute has taken the sanctity of human life and corrupted it beyond measure!

Danse: After all I've done for the Brotherhood... all the blood I've spilled in our name, how can you say that about me? Maxson: You're the physical embodiment of what we hate most! Technology that's gone too far! Look around you, Danse! Look at the scorched earth and the bones that litter the wasteland! Millions... perhaps even billions, died because science outpaced man's restraint! They called it a "new frontier" and "pushing the envelope", completely disregarding the repercussions! Can't you see that the same thing is happening again?! You're a single bomb in an arsenal of thousands preparing to lay waste to what's left of mankind!

- Maxson really, fundamentally doesn't get what the Institute's whole deal is, does he? like, their thing is sinister and horrific, but he's talking about them like they're the Brotherhood. this entire crusade was never about any of the actual harm the Institute were doing, it was because he heard someone else had power and technology and assumed that they'd use it like he would if he had the chance.

Cat: That's insane. He dedicated his life to protecting mankind. Maxson: Is that what it told you? How can you trust the word of a machine that thinks it's alive? Those ethics that it's striving to champion aren't even its own. They were artificially inserted in an attempt to have it blend in to society.

- WELCOME TO BEING AUTISTIC MOTHERFUCKER YOU JUST DESCRIBED *LEARNED SOCIAL BEHAVIOURS*!!!!!!!!!!!!

Danse: It's true. I was built within the confines of a laboratory, and some of my memories aren't my own. But when I saw my brothers dying at my feet, I felt sorrow. When I defeated an enemy of the Brotherhood, I felt pride. And when I heard your speech about saving the Commonwealth... I felt hope. Don't you understand? I thought I was human, Arthur! From the moment I was taken in by the Brotherhood, I've done absolutely nothing to betray your trust, and I never will. Maxson: It's too late for that now. I don't intend to debate this any longer. My orders stand. Danse: You've convinced me that I was wrong to be ashamed of my true identity, and I thank you for it. Whatever you decide, know that I'm going to my grave with no anger and no regrets.

- dude, come on! we just talked about this!

Maxson: Touching.

- YOU shut the fuck up!

Cat: After all the sacrifices I've made and all the battles I've fought for the Brotherhood, you need to listen to me. You owe me that much. Maxson: Very well, I'm listening.

- :3

Cat: If Danse dies, then you lose me as well. I can't stay in good conscience if his life means that little to you.

- this is very similar to the position i was in with High Confessor Tetris. i have too much clout for even Lord Eyeshadow to sweep me under the rug now, and i think he's just now realising it. literally anyone else, even renowned heroes like THE Paladin Danse, he can do away with if he's quick and quiet and doesn't let them get a word in edgeways, but me? i go loud, and i go messy, and i take the bastard with me.

---- check.

Maxson: Unbelievable. You'd be willing to sacrifice your career... for the sake of a machine. So. It appears we've arrived at an impasse. Allowing Danse to live undermines everything the Brotherhood stands for, yet you insist that he remains alive. Which leaves me with only a single alternative. Danse. As far as I'm concerned, you're dead. From this day forward, you are forbidden to set foot on the Prydwen, or speak to anyone from the Brotherhood of Steel. Should you choose to ignore me, know that you'll be fired upon immediately. Do we understand each other? Danse: I do. [missed line i think] Maxson: Don't mistake my mercy for acceptance. I'm returning to the Prydwen, Knight. Take some time, say your goodbyes, and then I expect to see you there. We still have the Institute to deal with.

- good move, buster.

[ailelie]

When I began writing, I wrote poetry.

Or did I?

I have trouble remembering my own history sometimes.

I loved fairy tales first.

I once started a story about something I can no longer remember and showed it to my grandmother who said it was good for my age.

I immediately gave it up. I stopped writing stories for years.

I have a book I wrote in elementary school. It has a story and it has poems. So maybe I started with both.

When I got serious about writing, though, I started with poetry. Even my first fanfic was a poem.

But in high school I figured out that I wasn't very good at them. Or maybe they were just too exposing.

I wrote a poem in high school and showed a teacher and she asked if I was gay. I immediately re-wrote the poem and destroyed every copy of the original. I remember the lines I changed. I no longer remember what they replaced.

This is the same teacher who told me that Edna St. Vincent Millay didn't count as a female poet when I gave that name. This was after she asked for my favorite poets who were Keats and Yeats at the time and then asked if I read any women. I like Millay, I told her. She doesn't count, she told me.

Looking back, I don't think she was a very good teacher.

The point is, I figured out I wasn't very good at poetry. I don't hear rhythm and so can never figure out meter. I clung too hard to rhyme schemes or very obvious rhythms even I could hear.

Sweet cologne through twilight air / floats through my mind and anchors there

I wrote that in my early teens and I still can't dislodge it.

I didn't start lines powerfully enough or end them powerfully enough or use strong enough language or the right details.

I always said I wanted criticism. I wanted to be better. But sometimes you look at all the holes in your ship and a tiny tin of caulk and have to just give in. No matter how hard you try or fast you move, you're still going to drown. Better to get out now and swim to safety than to go down with the ship.

This isn't a poem, though it leans that way at times. I'm just recording my thoughts as I have them.

Tumblr now houses my only poetry and every single poem is a reminder why I should stop trying. That's even the tags I use.

reasons why ailelie shouldn't write poetry

But I can't stop myself from drowning.

Words and stories are my first loves. When I was a little kid, I'd throw a book down on the floor, step up onto it like a soapbox, and loudly call for attention.

I never shut up.

Sometimes I think people nowadays think I'm quiet or don't talk that much. And, often, I don't around them. I've learned to hold my words in to not monopolize the conversation to not make it weird.

My freshman English teacher in high school actually decreed that another classmate and I were not allowed to talk in class because we dominated every discussion.

I love words. I love to talk. I love to make up songs no one is ever going to hear. My phone is full of my recordings. They aren't good. They're just mine. I love to write.

"I think better with a pen in my hand," I tell people over and over again and none of them realize just how exposing that statement is.

I am most myself when I am writing. I am most anything when I am writing.

When I fell into a depression a few years ago, I stopped writing. I get worried when I realize I've not written anything in a day or two. I can't remember the last day I passed without writing something and that's good.

I am terrified of losing my sight primarily because of the new barrier that would exist between me creating and consuming words.

I miss being the kid who never shut up. I always talked too fast and slurred my words together until speech therapy had me overpronouncing them.

In school, I loved studying literary devices. Language lets us do so much and I wanted to learn all of it.

But I've never quite had the talent of making words bend the way I want in fiction. I'll never be a writer. Or a poet. I decided a very, very long time ago that my passion would never be my occupation. I never wanted to resent words or writing.

But part of me wishes I'd honed the skill. I'll never be able to abandon ship, but holes are numerous and my tin of caulk is near-empty.

I'm going to drown here. I'm going to be okay with that.