#i've had this fucking annoying anon in my inbox every goddamn day

[sapphire-weapon]

They are waiting for 6 remakes to prove to you that you were wrong.

imagine having so little going on in your life that you're sitting around waiting for a game that won't come out for at least five years because someone on the internet made you feel insecure about whether a fictional relationship will be portrayed a certain way in a video game.

like, dude. these mfs think way more about me than i ever think about them or their ship. because, at the end of the day, i don't really care.

aeon's been a feature of RE's canon for 26 years, and it hasn't impeded my love for or enjoyment of the games. if aeon continues to be canon, then nothing in my life will have changed. i'm not going to get upset about something being the same way it's always been. it doesn't matter. RE will still be the same series i've always loved.

all i'm doing over here on this blog is interpreting the games' stories as they were written and providing analysis with evidence based in the text itself. that's why i have a giant wall of text post defending leon and ada's relationship as it's portrayed in OG -- because that's what the story is.

me liking or disliking the relationship has no bearing as to whether or not the relationship is canonically romantic. i don't have to like something for it to be true. and the fact is -- the truth is -- that for a majority of OG RE's runtime, leon and ada have a romantically coded relationship. and so i interpret it and analyze it that way, because that's what it is.

the fact also remains, however, that their relationship is no longer romantically coded in the remakes' version of events. and i'm not saying that because i dislike the relationship. clearly, as evidenced above, if the relationship was portrayed as romantic, i would treat and talk about it that way, regardless of whether i liked it or not. i'm saying that leon and ada's relationship is no longer romantically coded in the remakes' version of events because that's how the story is told.

and if that's upsetting for you (ubiquitous "you"), then maybe you should take it up with capcom's division 1 studio, because they're the ones writing the story. i didn't write the fucking story.

and, not for nothing, but like

i'm also wrong all the fucking time. i was wrong in predicting a wesker boss fight in SW. i was wrong in predicting more DLC coming for RE4make. i was wrong with my initial reading of remake ada from just base RE4make alone, and SW rendered all of my prior meta about her completely worthless.

and if i turn out to be wrong about aeon, i'm not going to be upset. i'm just going to add it to the list of shit i've been wrong about and move on with my life and continue analyzing the text with the new information we've been given.

but they keep trying to drag me into their ship wars as though i give a shit, and i don't. i don't fucking care about what ship is fucking canon, bro. i care about digging into the text and accurately interpreting the story because that's how i personally have fun in a fandom. it's not about the ship, for me. it's about the story.

like, eagleone isn't my only ship. it's not like i'm sitting over here concocting ways to twist the narrative in such a way that it looks like my ship is canon. i fucking ship leon with five other goddamn characters. and yet you don't see me making a case for any of those other ships being intended romances.

RE also isn't my only fandom. i play and talk about and care about other things and the industry in general all the time. i don't care about any of this RE ship shit nearly as much as they do, because i'm busy doing and caring about other things.

it's just so stupid, man. it doesn't matter. none of this matters. and it still won't matter when RE6make comes out.

we're all just trying to have fun here, and what i'm doing here on this blog, i do for myself. for my own fun. because this is how i have fun in fandom. it should have absolutely no bearing on anyone else's ability to have fun in the fandom -- and, if it does, then that person needs to stop fucking looking at my blog.

because none of this matters.

you know

i keep begging aeons to play other games, and this is exactly why.

[sea-dukes-assistant]

I know I been quiet.

I had duty yesterday and it was busy and shitty in an annoying way. I have seen the porn.

Today was just weird. I was dissociating, missing him, and overall just...I don't even know. I couldn't be here. Grog, talking with @deniseandthefandoms, and this song on repeat has helped me get out of that.

Anyway I'd like to take time to get some things off my chest, not so much a rant, but just...I'm fuckin' tired.

While talking with Denise, she told me I deserve to be respected and that this is my blog, and my space. I'm slightly embarrassed to say that made me tear up a bit, because holy shit I have put up with a lot of bullshit over the time I've been running this, and even now I feel like very few people actually do respect me as a person (not necessarily as an expert in Sea Duke knowledge).

Between the irrational hate I got back in the day when I was relationshipping with someone no longer here [the fandom literally thought I was made up and shit talked me to her and I saw that shit every fucking day, among other things], Rachel coming to me on anon wanting to suck my dick insulting my intelligence every chance she got, and the numerous, unending onslaught of anons telling me how "pathetic" I am and to "eat shit and die," and the insatiable need to ride into my inbox on a moral high horse, I feel like I do not get that. When I do, it's rare.

I know I am not always the easiest person to get along with. My tolerance for bullshit has decreased the longer I been doing this, over 8 years of service in the Navy [where, I have to say, I have been treated better] to include one deployment, and getting run the fuck over and dealing with literally re-learning how to life, and yes, getting older. I'm fucking tired. I'm burnt out.

I try to be as nice as I can about it but I when say something, like "hey don't pull up in my inbox and argue over stupid gossip," maybe...uh...DON'T FUCKING DO THAT? I definitely do not mean "hey do it anyway I want and enjoy the pettiness and need that in my life." Learn to fucking read. Respect what little expectations I put in place. I repeat myself more here with that than I do at work, dealing with kids fresh out of high school and at their first command. You're all adults [or at least like to brag that you are]. I know I can be silly. I encourage others to share it in [I mean, hello, *gestures at my friendship with Danelle*]. In no way way does that serve as an invite to act like my inbox is the gossip column of your high school newspaper.

The day he died is a perfect example. I don't know why people though that day was a good day to assault my inbox with gossip, trying to pick fights with other anons, shitty opinions, "hot takes" on shitty Andrew, and other completely unrelated bullshit, but fuck it y'all didn't care, did you? Nah, fuckin' send that shit! Like bruh, he just died my brain's more broken than usual shut the fuck up and give me space but nooooo nobody wanted to do that because they thought they were special and that didn't apply to them. IT TOOK SOMEONE ELSE TELLIN' Y'ALL TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR Y'ALL TO DO IT.

I don't get it. Is it because I'm a guy? Is that it? Because this fandom has a huuuuuge issue with shitting on men as a whole and apparently some think that alone is reason enough to force feed me their unsolicited opinions and lectures, and generally treat me like shit. Is it because I don't worship/hate whoever the fuck it's cool to worship/hate that particular week? I don't know how else I can say "I only care about Prince Philip like read the fuckin' header, dipshit." Or do y'all just straight up not give a shit and think because "it's the Internet" that it's just not A Thing? I could understand if I made a habit of coming into people's inboxes trying to start shit, but I don't. I literally just type my bullshit here on my own goddamn blog. Yes, if someone comes to me and is shitty, then that's different. But on the whole I stay the fuck out of it. This is largely why I have no fucks left to give. I'm tired.

Anyway.

I'mma go watch this porn these Sea Duke swimming clips and beat my dick like it owes me a 6 pack.