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tigirl-and-co · 2 years ago

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what was that abt Astro boy siblings au? 👀

The Astro Boy All Siblings AU, ready for action!!! also known as

I'm putting it under a readmore, bc it's gonna get long winded!!!

Most important stuff: it's something of a mix of all three major adaptations + Pluto, most emphasis on '63 and '80 though. And really, Pluto's very gently adapted, I really just want Gesicht and his wife in there. Pluto as a character is closer to his animated counterparts, especially the '80 version, where he's not so much 'aggressive' as he is just doing what he thinks he's supposed to be doing.

I should clarify- dub 1963, sub 2003 + 1980. Because that's what I watched.

This AU exists because I L O V E writing character interactions and developing characters with little to no screen time. So I've saved a bunch of characters who were supposed to die, and now they live with each other yaaaaay and also a bunch of one off characters who had good story potential haha

There are some characters whose names I sort of waffle on between the dub and Japanese versions, mainly Minute/Bill and Zero/Denkou.

Both 1980 and 2003 Atlas are here. I figured they were different enough for it. In this case, Daichi has a different name in his alt mode, I just haven't thought of it yet.

idk if Chi-Tan is gonna be here. I'll get back to you on that.

GRAPHIC 1: THE TIMELINE

This is a rough timeline and subject to change.

Marble is on this timeline, but she's not a 'sibling' so to speak, but she and Lucky Louie are kind of Astro's first friends. So Marble is Astro's sort of bestie in this and he takes a trip out to go visit her every so often. Louie, despite being in jail, is kind of an uncle figure to Astro. Astro can ask Louie for advice or opinions without being judged or worrying that it'll get back to anybody else.

The meeting with Atlas is very similar to how it goes in the anime, except I think I'm still going with 'sold his ass to the circus' backstory, so it's more likely he was on a cruise with Ochan, or maybe his parents. Maybe both?

Cobalt has always had middle sibling energy to me, so I switched him and Uran around. I'm working with something a bit closer to the manga backstory, but with the anime personality.

Uran is somewhere between her 1963 and 2003 self. She's more self-sufficient, can drive and did the whole fighting ring shebang (in fact I'm thinking of KEEPING her doing it part-time, for reasons I'll elaborate on later.) But like her 2003 self, she's still emotionally very young, and craves the approval of her older siblings, even if she thinks they're goody two-shoes.

Pook's dad goes to jail, and Ochan agrees to take him in until he's released. He's still very rowdy and kind of a prankster, but he's less actively malicious since his dad instructed him to be nice, and he'll be back.

Pluto! The events play out closer to '80 + '03, but Gesicht still gets to do his whole detective schtick and have ~trauma.~ I'm debating about Epsilon, bc him having the orphans would imply the war was a thing, and that's just not something I'm suited to tackle. On the other hand, Astro being the cool older cousin to a house full of orphans brings me great joy

ANYWAY Pluto is damaged and out of commission, but technically reparable. Ochan brings him to the ministry of science, and works on him in his spare time.

The events of Atlas' episode play out pretty much the same, except that Ochan and Ban have been tracking him down- after all, a robot that can stand toe-to-toe with Astro is a big deal! The whole operation is busted directly after Atlas discovers Livian's parts. Atlas agrees to go with them, but only after Ochan promises he can repair Livian with no problems.

Daichi/Atlas 2003 happens, but instead of building him to test Astro, Tenma does it to *spite* Astro. I'm keeping Tenma out of this au for the most part. I just want him where it would make for good angst.

Livian moves in with Ochan! She helps both as an assistant during research, and as a helping hand with Pook. Ochan is an older man with a busy schedule, and looking after a rambunctious child is not something he can do single-handedly. Livian also wants Atlas to grow as a person without using her as a crutch, and now that he has a family willing to help him she thinks he finally can.

Pluto's full body is restored and he is brought back online! His size means he's kind of relegated to the bigger rooms of the Ministry, outdoor activities, and Ochan's backyard, but he tries to make do. He and Astro get on well, but he's actually much closer with Uran! He and Livian also begin to become good friends, and have late-night chats about philosophy and junk.

Later on, Pluto finally asks to have a humanoid body. He wants to participate in society. He does have a few demands, though! He wants to be tall still, and he wants horns similar to what he has now. Ochan agrees, but says it will be difficult and take a while.

Daichi episode 2! I'm not entirely certain how I wanna play this, but blah blah stuff happens, and Daichi's dad makes a promise to try harder to be a good parent. Daichi moves back into the mansion. Things aren't perfect, but they're actively trying, so it's better than it was before.

Pluto's body is finished! I have some design ideas for him, but nothing I'm ready to talk about yet. He's tall as hell, and keeps his horns curled to the side a ram. I'm going for kind of a teen vibe. He's still got a lot to learn, and I wanted to reflect that in his design. He finds he actually enjoys being helpful, but he is also not afraid to throw punches when need be. It's really just that his standards for 'need be' have been raised. He and Daichi get along okay.

I'm going with the 1963 design for Denkou here. I know everybody likes the 2003 one but I'm not a huge fan. I'm also going to call him Zero just for ease of writing, but tag him as Denkou so he doesn't get mixed up with the other Zero I blog about haha.

His backstory plays out kinda like a mix between all three versions, with him willing and ready to sacrifice himself like in '63, but he lives like in '03. Daichi actually helps out, using himself as an example of how even if you do the wrong the thing, you don't have to be bad forever. Zero moves in with Daichi (after Daichi can convince his dad- it's not hard to convince a wealthy man to take in a very expensive, one-of-a-kind robot, it turns out), and they become very close, with Zero looking up to Daichi, and Daichi realizing that means he really needs to shape up.

I rewatched the ending of Mighty Minute/Humanoid Bill, but I need to take time to watch the whole thing again. I'm going with 'they create a suit with a suitable filtration system, which allows Minute to roam free.' He still needs a lot of rest, but it's better than nothing. He and Pook become GREAT friends. Inseparable. If you make a lot of noise while Minute is resting, Pook will absolutely tell you to shut up.

Eventually Pook and Minute move in with Higeoyaji. He's good with kids, Ochan just really doesn't have the energy to care for them, and they actually can help him out in detective cases! He doesn't bring them to anything he thinks might be dangerous, of course, but Minute's predictive abilities and Pook's strength and transformations are very helpful.

How does he pay for them, despite being a schoolteacher/detective and broke as balls? Why, a stipend from the ministry, of course! Both Pook and Minute are outstanding scientific achievements! It certainly doesn't have anything to do with Ochan being biased, why would you think that?

Last Day on Earth plays out, Bem survives and stays with Astro for a while, but 5 super kids is just kind of a lot. Astro and Ochan reach out to Gesicht, and ask if he and his wife are interested in trying to raise a child again. They've had time to process their grief, and are more than happy to welcome him into their home! Bem is a recurring character from this point, but mostly through video calls.

Then Future shows up! Yaaaaaay Future! He survives his ordeal but is badly damaged. Ochan rebuilds him to the best of his ability, but certain parts were so advanced that it's out of his wheelhouse. He still has predictive abilities, but they're nerfed somewhat. Instead of a picture perfect vision of what will happen, he moreso sees a few different possibilities of what COULD come to pass.

Eventually, Daichi and Zero move in with him. Daichi is still on decent terms with his father, but he feels the need to get out from under his thumb, and Zero goes where Daichi goes.

So, in essence

OTHER IMPORTANT BITS:

I was raised to see my cousins like siblings. Our parents would just kind of shuffle kids around between houses + my grandma's house as need be. That affects how I see characters interacting. So while I see Pook as more of a little cousin to astro, that really more means 'little sibling you only see sometimes'

Zero helps Ban on his detective cases! Zero genuinely REALLY likes using his powers to help people. He'll help put criminals away, sure, but he much prefers doing stuff like tracking down lost pets or items and returning them to their owners. He gets the warm fuzzies.

Idk if you remember those robots with like. sensitive stomachs? Who were escapees from a country or something. The kid's name was Piko. They eventually do actually move in as neighbors.

^these guys.

Atlas is still gruff, but he secretly very much enjoys being praised. He'll work a lot harder for people who are kind to him, but he does NOT express affection verbally, and only very rarely physically. He starts out very cold and aloof, but over time he gets ~*character development*~ and becomes incredibly protective of his siblings. He's also willing to throw down for ANYBODY he sees being taken advantage of. Astro prays he never learns about bosses being mean to their employees.

He's also somewhat misanthropic. Not to the degree he gets in canon, but his first life experiences were of him being abused and taken advantage of. If you can prove you actually care about robots, he'll drop from 'watching you like a hawk' to 'just kind of guarded' and after a LONG while he might consider you a friend. He's now at the point where he's just as protective of Marble as he is any of his siblings, especially once he learns about what went down with her and Astro.

Because of his distrust toward humans, the blue knight actually targets HIM and not astro. This will (hopefully) be a fic in its own right, so I won't get too into it here. Blue Knight is also NOT happy that Uran fights of her own free will

Pluto is completely genderblind. Like fully and completely. But bc he takes looking out for others VERY seriously now, a lot of the women who work at the ministry talk to him about their frustrations, and know he's the person to call out to when they feel unsafe. Icon.

Atlas can not be left alone with Tenma, Hamegg, or Skunk. He would turn their insides into outsides for what they did to Astro and Zero, respectively. Honestly they're lucky he has better things to do than track them all down.

Two other characters that show up from time to time after their introduction is Abra and Cadabra, the magician robots!

astro has free tickets for life.

Astro's school friends are still all here. They're kind of protective not only of Astro, but also Atlas, once they learned what he went through. Atlas and Shibugaki are especially vitriolic buddies. Atlas isn't so stupid that he can't see how similar they are, and also one time shibugaki bit some random guy spewing anti robot shit, and that impressed the hell out of Atlas.

because I'm mental I AM shoehorning black jack and pinoko into this au as reoccurring characters. Dr. Honma was an old friend of Ochan, and thus he and BJ are on good terms. Pinoko is basically a cousin from the other side of the family, since she's in a weird limbo area between biological human and artificial creation.

I think Future just ends up going by a super normal regular guy name, like Dennis or Adam. He, Daichi, and Zero move in together, for reasons that make sense in my brain I promise

I'm also bringing in a lot of one-off characters I like to be background roles, but this whole thing has taken so long to post and I'm tired. I'm NOT bringing back the scary buff horse man, you'll be glad to know.

so uh. Yeah. All Siblings AU. I'm sure there's guys I'm forgetting, and would likely want to add, but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. And also once I read the manga

If you read this whole thing mwah mwah mwah thank you for being so gracious about my blatant insanity.

#titi talks #tezuka talk #all siblings au #astro boy #tezuka star system #atlas #denkou #minute #future #pluto #my writing #cobalt #uran

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moonlightguardianmoon · 1 year ago

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I don't watch Murder Drones, but your SCP/Murder Drones crossover intrigues me. Elaborate. *Strokes my very fancy beard fancily*

SCP Murder Drones AU Crossover!

So, I've been wanting to talk about this for a LONG while. However school needed to be done at the time. But now that I'm done with High-School I can now put my focus on other projects! So let me explain.

\/ read more here \/

It all started with the company JCJenson (In SPAAAACEE!), a company set on mining exoplanets for their resources, with the help of Worker Drones. The Worker Drones worked under the humans for their parent company. Of course, the SCP Foundation had gotten wind of the company and had decided to partner alongside the company before any other anomalous organization did. The SCP foundation offered JCJenson protection from anomalous space threats and some of their anomalous robotics research. In return, JCJenson would offer the foundation some of their unoccupied exoplanets for containment and research preposes and some of their Worker Drones to help around the foundation. Ever since then, the foundation has been able to make trips through space and were able to further their research while JCJenson continued as normal. That is, until one of the exoplanets that the foundation occupied, Anomalous 322 had an Exoplanet wide containment breach on the Anomalous 322. This exoplanet wide containment breach had caused almost all human life to be wiped off the exoplanet, some say the remaining humans underground were turned into zombies by scp-008 in the more deeper underground labs of tbe buildings they had built on Anomalous 322. leaving on the Worker Drones and scps on the exoplanet to roam free with both sides have agreed to live in peace, making sure no word of their freedom was brought back to the foundation.

However, under unknown reasons, a message was sent back to the 05 council about what had happened on Anomalous 322. The person or thing that sent the message was unknown, but what the Foundation did know, was that they needed to send a team of MTF Beta-7 and MTF Gamma-4 to go deal with the exoplanet wide breach. Unfortunately, once the teams had reached the planet not two days later, the Foundation had lost contact with the teams. Thinking of other options to deal with the matter, the 05 Council were debating about sending MTF Last Hope to deal with the matter, until they had received a message from their partners, JCJenson about the matter. JCJenson had told the Foundation about a similar situation with one of their exoplanets Copper 9, and suggested that they offer to send them blueprint for their new latest "special" kind of Drones.

Disassembly Drones. The foundation happily excepted, wishing them luck with their own exoplanet fiasco, and the foundation got to work. During tge middle of planing and creation of the new team of Disassembly Drones, who would be However, one of the members of the project team to create these Disassembly drones suggested they put their own little twist on the Disassembly Drones. If it was anomalous that they would also be dealing with, they would need more than just disassembly to be required on the matter. They also required containment. So they began some experiments with the Drones, until one idea was thrown amongst the foundation to use the minds and abilities of a few of their SCPs to help deal with the breach on the exoplanet. At first denied by the Ethics committee, it wasn't approved until a sudden change in goal among the 05 council was discussed. The concuil concluded that a team of scps would be selected to have their minds and powers placed into the new Disassembly Drones, which now renamed Containment Drones. The team would be known as MTF Disassembly Require. The three scps that were selected were scp-682, scp-076, scp-054, scp-079, and scp-049. These three chosen scps would be sent out to exoplanet Anomalous 322 and recontain the breached anomalies. . .

They were supposed to recontain them

...

But now... They have been given a whole new objective.

-New objective Downloading. . .

-Disassemble all life: ^Code:05-3_

#ask me stuff #ask #answered asks #thanks for the ask!#scp #scp fandom #murder drones scp crossover!!!#murder drones #crossover

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dinosaurcharcuterie · 6 months ago

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As someone working in private health insurance in a country in Europe where this stuff is regulated -- I still hate it.

Naturopathy, chiropractic included, got regulated to make these quacks have some accountability, be forced to look at an anatomy textbook and give people a sense of when they were being ripped off. In response, people assumed this was the government putting naturopaths on the same level as actual doctors and dentists. In response to that, you have actual doctors getting certified as naturopaths and "preferring" to give naturopath treatment unless "allopathic" medicine is "necessary". They say it has nothing to do with the prices for naturopathy being a bit higher, and definitely definitely nothing to do with them thinking their patients are faking things.

And, to be fair, direct injuries (as opposed to indirect damage done from delayed or avoided medical attention) from naturopaths are low and mostly limited to medication interactions where people fully believe herbal tea magically can't affect medication, or allergic reactions to massage oils... Except in one area. You get three guesses which.

So, chiropractic especially got regulated even more strictly when injuries kept happening. And it changed nothing much so far, half a decade later. They're supposed to send patients to a doctor if it's a more complex problem, but...

In my current caseload of chronically ill patients I've now got someone who got unlimited chiropractic approved. The original argument was that they'd need less physiotherapy (28-45 euro are covered per session, depending on diagnosis, of which 3 a week are necessary). They have since quit physio entirely, and their condition has gotten mysteriously worse, despite upping the chiro (70-90 euro per session) from twice a month to 3-4 times a week, and their doctors prescribing stronger meds and getting surgery.

I've got someone who has several all caps warnings to not pay out any chiro, as the professor of orthopedics who has been treating them for double digit months says it might be lethal. Their spine is so damaged, half the bones are misaligned and look like something out of a geode splitting ASMR video. After surgery. With half a hardware store worth of titanium screws and plates trying to keep their spinal cord straight enough to undo the nerve damage that kind of injury causes.

I wish those cases were rare enough that just describing them narrows it down to a small enough group of people to identify someone by, but I'm not.

Yes, we get sat down once every quarter or two and told what numbers look good and what numbers make the CEO so so sad. They're happy if a 70 euro chiro visit means the problem is fixed, instead of a 20 minute doctor visit (12 euro, 25 if they're feeling frisky, because regulated prices) with a prescription (3 euro) of 6 rounds of physio (usually the 28 euro/session kind, plus a one time 16 euro fee for non chronic issues or new therapy attempts). But that's only true if the doctor-cum-naturopath types are right and the patient is faking and just needs to whine a little and feel another human being touch them to feel better forever.

Statistics show it's costlier to pay out naturopaths in the long run. Because we can't cancel cover over here. We can't adjust what kind of cover someone has once they have the insurance. We can hike up premiums if costs rise, but that just makes all the healthy cash cows seek greener pastures. The limit to out of pocket pay is 5k annually, and most companies cap it at half that at most, usually just 1.2k.

So why is it covered under those circumstances? The same reason GSH dogs still get liability cover despite causing the most damage, both material and personal, of any dog breed, pit bulls included: it's part of the cultural landscape, and to exclude it would cost you customers and have you branded as a tyrannical, unreasonable company.

And to make matters worse: the fact that we are more or less forced by convention to accept naturopaths as legitimate physicians, means we ask about how often you've visited them in the past as a prospective customer. We can only adjust cover before anything is signed, after all. And because naturopaths have to pretend to be physicians to operate, they have to say what diagnosis they're treating. If they have a medical degree (most don't), that's not too hard and they tend to stay realistic. If they don't, they still have to write something down which they feel is plausible, but serious enough to warrant (further) treatment. Ideally they'd communicate with a physician over that, but that requires a treating physician. And also scary legal paperwork. And the cooperation of said physician, because they sure as fuck can't argue they're providing vital and necessary care beyond the doctor's skill level.

Any stab in the dark they take is now a pre existing condition. Not fixed in six months? Welp, that's chronic. And, yeah, private health insurance companies will refuse to accept you if your health status too egregious (with very few exceptions if you're not a newborn). Or maybe they will--and then be legally in their right to charge up to juuuust under double the usual premium until you can prove you don't have that diagnosis.

How? Easy! A physician needs to confirm (25-40 euros) through lab work (anywhere from 15-2500 euros), and your naturopath can't charge for it anymore if you do get in, or at least one of you will get sued for fraud. In which case you're now on the hook for all costs related to that diagnosis which you've incurred with an insurance company. Plus interest at the current rate of inflation.

So... Only healthy people and the naturopaths are harmed the least by this. Because--oh yes--they recommend healthy people get treatment prophylactically.

I'm not saying health insurance are the good guys (my job would be so much easier if there was universal, science based, tax funded health insurance) but this particular flavor of fuckery is 100% organic woo lobbying.

Periodic reminder that you should never trust a chiropractor with your body under any circumstances

#naturopaths #chiropractic #stories from work #pseudoscience #quackery #calling this medicine is an insult to sick people and diverting money away from people who need it #i have to pay out globuli but god forbid a pensioner gets a prescription for calcium and vitamin D #long post #zero regrets #rant

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the-firebird69 · 5 months ago

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novae terrae

I like it it has meaning and it is important meaning. It's pertinent and it does a striking effect on me and my husband is in awe we're husband and wife and we are the big ones here.

north American Celestials

and we approve of course

Hera Zues

We like it too and we're gonna look at it and it goes along with what they think is a Canadian name It is really really a potent name though but still people take awhile to figure out stuff and we can't name it turtle that's ridiculous and we don't think it was named turtle they're they're kind of weird people. And this is the MR2 above it would be one of the cars used there could be three one of them might be the Volkswagen so we're going to think about it but that is from engine but it might fit in this particular car because it's not really that high up.

Olympus

No offense folks but the Volkswagen outnumbers all of you and it's sturdier and we can do it with the others if it doesn't work but I checked it it's like an inch higher than the Cena but we're going to lower the cockpit not the front portion and we're gonna actually the way it put it comes out front is fine and it would be the same that the wheelbase is about four inches shorter so a 103 inches versus 107 and we're gonna make it longer anyways but when you do that it'll be about the same way same length and you can make the same car 4 wheel drive is fine then first these start with 130 horsepower

vw bug stock 130hp top speed 185mph yes mph

vw bug o beetle really 0-60 4.5 seconds yes not so good

vw bug quarter mile 7.9 seconds and ok

.........................

CENA KIT CAR OURS ON VW BEETLE year 1997-2010

new top speed 425mph plus

new 0-60mph 3.9 seconds

quarter mile 6.9 seconds

Keep in mind that it has a full cage and is safe has an enclosure it is not massively heavy and Xena has a heavy car and he probably have metal panels and still go 600 miles an hour and that's the reason for a big motor and so you have to heft if you need it but this has speed and safety and you can get away even with half done a supercar doesn't really help that much if you hit a regular pickup truck it's all over. except for the cage I mean he might survive a few hits but same thing with this car he just bounced off and it might be safer.

Black God and Black Goddess

These are kind of secrets but nobody seems to get them incite someone talking and they don't know if it's true or not I realize I realize that and he's been saying it his clan is handing out information on the max got in trouble and people didn't really believe them and it was horrible someone told them to shut up and they said no he said I'm getting some of it and I I'm making something work and they were amazed too and who.

mac daddy

We also have a comment on this this is terrific and he wants to do the porch version too and we need the engineering on the John Cena and I just don't have time. I wanna do it I wanna do it badly and the two can help and really this is this would make a comeback for the Volkswagen and you have a version that people liked it's old and the front end doesn't look like a ball over the top and the rear end looks better and he's he knows what it is it's the Carmen Gear and yeah so you can make that for regular car for regular people 4 door two and a two door like they do everything else and he thinks that's great and it is so maybe you could design all three. And it needs to be stretched out a little and dropped down and the new features and he wants a list so I've got that. And I'll send it over and this is great it says we can do it start it in the Midwest and you can start your Porsche kit over there and yes we'll see who makes more of which any studs laughing that's a good idea but yeah I guess we'll have to design it but he wants you to do the Porsche 1 and he wants assistance with AVW and he's gonna have a Frank do it and he says he will and that's Frank Castle hard castle and Duke Nukem blockbuster says it was my car as well so he says who wants to do that. And Frank Castle a hard castle says it was his car And he's gonna do it good so I think for the VW and he agrees there's a lot of them and they still run but how many versus these cars. It says there's a lot more.

Thor Freya

iw as in the top

Frank Castle Hardcastle

There is a lot more to this no but I will tell you that the Volkswagen is prevalent but it doesn't have as many around as the MR2 but that doesn't have as many around as the Honda 660S which has mostly all of what we need to get it going there are other things to take into account rather than mid engine is the power level it's a very weak car the transmission in motor Not really sturdy but he says that you put it in there and you have on the literature an upgrade and we can sell the upgrade which would be a Honda in the Honda Trans axle or facsimile thereof and it's truly you can get the Honda Motor and the guy blows out his 880 or whatever and he buys the four cylinder so with that said I understand the concept. Smaller it's less expensive you can buy AS 660 for around$3000 it's kind of a dog it really is it is a complete dog it is a complete failure except in Asia and they still don't like it there it's ridiculous so we will go ahead with it and we're going to look at this because it seems to be a really good idea and I like it a lot I don't think that we could make a rear engine version work that well and the front engine is too high up in the air no it won't handle well enough if you do it with this 660S it's way too underpowered and the motor is expensive satan $8000 with the transmission. The Volkswagen they have only 200,000 trillion no it's like 200 trillion they're all kind of kind of gone so I'm going back to the damn Chevy Cruze and I'm more comfortable with 200 horsepower and I saw your face too 800CC it's like 40 cubic inches. That's ridiculous. You said a Harley Davidson Motor is still only 100 horsepower and they way too much but the transmission would hold out probably work but what a pain so we don't want to do that. He said he's gonna just keep gyrating until I pick it up and knock it out there it'll take only a few days with young engineers who want to have a part of it. I do feel bad and I see what you're saying we need them to take on the responsibility and shoulder it and have the cause and it is a great one this thing would be awesome I like the Chevy Cruze idea it's a regular car it doesn't do anything it's not like it could do something which a lot of these sporty ones could. It's like it will never do it just like the beetle. That was the point of the beetle being used with the Bradley GT1 and he told Dave and he said no way so it's the same concept the thing will never go faster than 130 and will never beat anybody in a race no matter what you put in it change the tires put a 350 in there and you're going up to 170. So I'm gonna get working on this and I'm glad we went through this there's other cars for those but really they're phased out so they're gonna have to think of something different probably something like Chevy Cruze in Germany and something like it elsewhere and he says no it's here so it would be these cars the American cars that don't do anything and there's a lot of them in different models look like different cars the Mercedes has a supercar it looks like a the Mercedes has a supercar it looks like a Chrysler the configuration is the same and I get that chrysler has a 400 horsepower car and there's a Mercedes super car that looks really hot and women would like it and that's a German car so he's interested and it's a better idea I'm gonna go ahead with this and start getting it going and your idea is good we think that Sina will actually buy them and eventually we use a different chassis that we would probably make and we can make it faster it's easier to do but we're not gonna do the work but you know sometimes it's easier to make a car than it is to make a kit but at this point you have to do that and we're gonna start out with it so he is interested and we're gonna proceed

Duke Nukem blockbuster

We're going to approve this

Olympus

God bless you all for hanging in there this was terrible . Right now there's a war right to the east the more locker out there with 40 households out of really 107 they didn't get trapped and they are ganging up on them no they're getting more and more people right now it's becoming a huge huge battle and we will have more updates momentarily.

Thor Freya

Moving that engine is difficult and he wanted to avoid it but boy you can't do it these days and we want it to be a mid engine but we're gonna offer there's an option. It won't be that hard for us and they'll think it's worth $1,000,000 we'll probably have to charge some money and to make it sell. But first he says it's not going to be an expensive kid that we get that.

Olympus

Now I don't see what you're saying it's not going to be Bradley gt but it won't be like a replica and replicas are pretty good so I am going to do it and I saw the Spartan interior and it's not his it was a different vehicle but that's the idea is to make it very cheaply and simply to get it out but not dumb looking it's going to look modern like a spaceship and I do know how to do that i'll put a couple things in there make it cool and the steering mechanism and gear shifter have to be and that's nice in the seats so that's something I understand and I do understand what you're saying we don't want to make it a $1,000,000 car we want people to be able to afford it in lots of them. And his guys don't have much money. Kinda kick things around like this and something to do rather than get in trouble. So we're gonna go ahead with this and I'm gonna start right now. Now I have the concepts it's gonna be down and dirty but it's gonna look awesome and work awesome and the insides they can do the they have all sorts of people who do that and at some point he said well launch a contest for the interior design and see which components go in and that's saying no way and we can do it that way and then we'll claim the design. They do buy it more afterwards by the way.'cause they knew who it was

'cause they knew who it was

Duke Nukem Blockbuster

It's kinda like the outside when you start it up but I do understand what you're saying it's really his design but here we go with that stuff right now.

john Cena He says I'll have to go out some ax where they got it

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curseofaphrodite · 2 years ago

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Prince of Diamonds

DAEMON TARGARYEN X READER

link to part 2 | series masterlist

summary: the day had arrived for you to marry Viserys, but of course, weddings in Westeros are nothing if not chaotic.

The castle was alive with laughs — there were so many people from so many places, so many congratulations, and as many gifts (from pieces of jewelry to weapons) that it felt like you were in a fairytale of some sort.

Except you were fucking terrified the entire time.

Everything about the day felt off, as if you were about to be hung from the ropes than be wed to a king.

You went to take a stroll through the kingdom in disguise to get your mind off things, and were surprised at the commoners' lives.

For some reason, you had thought they'll be warm and cheery and content with the small life they led, far away from royal politics and bloodshed. But poverty seemed to have tightened its grip on most of them, and you wondered why the fuck Viserys hadn't mentioned any of these issues before.

It was always strategies to protect the people, but everything else seemed to have been missed from council meetings. You included had wanted the Iron Throne, but never knew the asterisk that came with it.

Until now.

It was heartbreaking to see how lively the town was, as if they were used to the miseries by now. As if they didn't know there was a castle right within their reach with leeches living their best lives while they were wallowing in debt.

"Apple, miss? Fresh apples?" a kid yelled from the sidewalks. You walked on as you didn't want to be recognized.

"What about grapes? I have grapes too!" he followed and you noted how he didn't sound desperate — just very casual, like he was your friend for more years than he had been born.

"I'm in a hurry," you replied hastily, but he was easily catching up.

"C'mon! I'll let you taste some for free! It's so delicious you won't resist buying the rest for your family."

"Look I—"

But he ran in front of you and made you halt anyway. You could only see his feet properly because you still had your clock on.

"What's up with your attire? Are you one of the circus performers?" he asked, seemingly forgotten about his own business.

You sighed, seeing no way out of it. You pulled down your robe and stared him right in the eye. He gasped, his jaw on the ground.

The place seemed to have stopped its bustling. Silent murmurs died away as everyone seemed to notice you. They all stood right where they were, not believing their eyes.

"It's the Queen-to-be!" A middle-aged guy finally yelled, falling to his knees. Following his example, more bent down. You knew this was to be expected, but it still shook you to your core. These people already seemed to respect you, even with a short acquaintance.

You found yourself hoping it was respect and not fear.

"Rise," you said loudly, thinking on the spot. "I've come to invite everyone here for the wedding. There will be food enough to feed two armies."

The kid blinked. "The guards will let us in?"

"If I command so, of course they will."

Grateful gasps rippled through the crowd and soon they started to murmur among themselves, probably wondering why you came all the way here, why you couldn't have sent a messenger, why you seemed so humane while the royals seemed like gods. They were asking all of that with approval, like they wouldn't have it any other way.

"Forgive me, your Highness," a woman rushed forwards to the kid. "He's young, he's been known to provoke- he didn't realize—"

"It's fine," you reassured, suddenly glad that you took off your robe. "In fact, I think I'll do some wedding shopping."

--------

"You invited the whole of King's Landing?" Viserys asked, barging into your room.

It was almost evening, exactly three hours before the wedding. Right as he entered, all the maids fussing over you did a short curtsy and exited, as if they all collectively smelled a fight coming on.

But Viserys looked more exhausted than angry.

"Yes," you replied simply, looking at the finest of gowns laying on the bed, not sure which one to choose.

He sighed. "I wish you would include me in these decisions, Y/N."

"Like you include me in the council meetings?" you snapped, turning around to glare at him.

"There's always a seat for you at the table, I just didn't know if you'd like it."

"There's nothing about this I like."

"Pardon?"

Fuck. "I'm nervous," you lied, sitting down on the bed. "All of this is so much right now."

"We can take it one step at a time," Viserys smiled. "That's all it has to be. And I'm not mad at you for going to the town, but I do wish you had let a guard accompany you."

"That's defeating the purpose," you cracked a smile in response. "I'll consider it next time."

"Good. I'll leave you to it then," he gestured towards all the extravagant gowns and accessories. He hesitated. "One more thing... you haven't heard any rumors of late, have you?"

You hated yourself right then. You wished Viserys was an evil man, but he had grown to be your friend. He didn't force you to a marriage, you had agreed to it yourself. He never yelled at you or looked down on you, but it was as if right at that moment, both of you knew you could never be happy with each other.

Because the rumors he was referring to wasn't about you and Daemon. It was about him and Alicent. How he visits her chamber at night, how he only leaves in the morning.

"Did Daemon say anything?" you asked in reply.

"He wished to convey his congrats."

"That doesn't sound like him."

"Exactly what I thought."

You smiled. He turned around with guilt in his eyes.

"For what it's worth, every townsfolk who's at the gates has been hailing your name." He said softly. "You're already a queen in their eyes."

If anything, that reassured you even less.

----

You stood at the top of the aisle in a plain grey gown, your hair in a braid and covered in gold accessories. Weddings in Westeros were grand as they were gothic.

You didn't notice the people, just Daemon standing beside Viserys, his eyes on anything but you. He appeared collected and quiet, and you wanted nothing more than retrace the last night with him. What if I had said... nevermind.

The priest went on about legacies and love, and you failed to see how they were connected. Sure you were zoning out, but you also couldn't hear him out of the sounds of your own heartbeats.

There was silence, and everyone was looking at you. You had reached the part to say your vows. Your throat closed up. Viserys blinked in confusion.

"I—" you stammered, unable to go on. Sudden whispers started across the hall. "Can I talk with you for a moment, my lord?"

"Must be awfully important if it's the middle of this," Otto Hightower said loudly. Son of a bitch.

"Viserys... please."

Daemon gritted his teeth and came out of his statuesque behavior. He came by your side and started to whisper so others couldn't hear.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"Daemon—" you were surprised at how worried he sounded.

"It's a terribly inconvenient time to get cold feet! Do you realize how stupid you're acting? For fuck's sake, remedy this before—"

"Get away from her," Viserys said sharply. Daemon instantly obeyed, not wanting to make things more serious, only out of concern for you. "Y/N, what is the meaning of this?"

"I can't be your wife," you said softly. "I'm sorry."

"What?" Viserys looked lost. Surprised. But not hurt. That was something.

"Can't you see it, my lord?" Otto yelled for the benefit of the hall, glaring at both you and Daemon. "She's been defiled. Guards!"

Your throat was met with the sword of an eager knight. It didn't touch your skin, simply hovered there for further instructions. You understood why this show of power was necessary. As the betrothed, simple rumors were enough to get you exiled, but a claim as vulgar as this simply thrown to the air led to bloodshed every time. After the initial shock, someone in the audience screamed.

Daemon didn't care about political advances and even if he did, he would have still done what he did next. He brought his dagger out and held it over the throat of the knight in mere seconds.

"A scratch on her and I'll burn you inside out," Daemon said quietly.

"STOP THIS MADNESS!" Viserys ordered.

The knight dropped his sword at once, but Daemon didn't let go. If anything, the dagger was pressed tighter. The knight was already bleeding. Viserys grabbed your hand and pulled you away from the scene, towards the secluded corner where no one was watching. Eyes followed, but none took a step forward.

"You haven't slept with Daemon," he stated firmly. "What kind of game are you playing?"

"I fear if I were to stay in this palace, I could be involved with him. You deserve a queen more loyal than that—"

"Don't you dare say this is for my benefit!"

"—and I deserve a husband who doesn't cheat too," you hissed. "You've been to Alicent's room more than you've been to mine. Or did you think I wouldn't notice?"

He paled.

"It's the right thing to do. You don't love me. This is an arrangement." You stressed. "You care about me like you care about your friends. I can't rob you of your happiness and you can't rob me of mine. Let me leave in peace before I besmirch your reputation."

"You're doing that already by refusing to be the queen."

"I'm not refusing. I can't be the queen right now. Have you seen the state of your people? Frankly speaking, neither of us is fit to be rulers. At least I'll acknowledge that and take my leave."

"I have duties!" he yelled.

"Then do them," you snapped. "Don't drag me into this."

"You would be declaring war between our houses," he said pleadingly. "I don't want to cause you hurt."

"You won't," you said firmly. "Hold your troops. Have meetings about the stained integrity of my house. Feed lies to your people that actions have consequences. Fuck Alicent. Marry her. Just let me go."

He groaned. "Even if I let you go, the rest of them won't."

He was talking about Otto, the guards, and everyone who was prepared to see your downfall. You knew it. You had also planned for it.

"Viserys please," you begged, gritting your teeth. "Let me escape. I'll go to a place where no one knows my name. I'll come back a queen, just not of Iron Throne."

He glared, but you knew he had caved. "I'll hold the fort for three minutes."

"You're the king," you said, pecking his cheek with gratitude. "You can do five."

Then you were off.

------------

When you reached your room, nothing had been left. The cupboards were emptied, the table looked like new and even the books were missing.

Daemon Targaryen stood in the middle of it with a huge bag.

"No," you said, connecting the dots. "You're not coming with me."

"If you go alone, you're dead."

"I'll take my chances," you deadpanned, reaching for the bag which had your stuff. He pulled it away.

"Now's not the time for ego. Look at it this way, I know Westeros better. I know the secret passageways. I know this place because I've bled on it."

"Do you not want to know why I've stopped the wedding?" you asked cautiously.

"Because you chickened out and realized none of this is a game."

"Because I knew you'd ruin everything if I went through it. I didn't marry him because of you."

He snorted. "The blame falls on me now?"

"Daemon you can't come with me or you'll be the main source of rumors here. Everyone will think we ran away and when you come back, you could be killed."

"Then I won't come back." He took a step forwards. "Is that what you want me to say? That I'll actually run away with you? That we'll go to the other side of the Narrow Sea and spend our days in the sun with no worries?"

"Don't be ridiculous, that sounds boring," you interrupted. "I'm saying I need to lay low until I figure out a plan."

"I'm good with plans."

"No, you're not."

"No, I'm not but I'm coming anyway."

"Daemon—"

"We'll do as you say," he said hastily. "We'll lay low for a while. Just until the smoke blows over and Viserys finds a new wife. I'll make him do formal amends so the kingdom can stop talking about this. Then you'll come back with me. If anyone dares to speak a word, I'll cut out their tongue."

"Even if it's Otto?"

"Especially if it's Otto," he smiled. "Though his tongue won't be my first choice to cut off."

You laughed. "Fine... I guess we're running."

He looked alarmed. "Running? Oh no hon, we're flying."

---------------------------------

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queer-as-used-by-tolkien · 3 months ago

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this got long, so TL;DR: I am asexual and in the asexual community. Nobody here thinks that's what those labels mean or imply. Everybody here loves, values, and treasures our nonsexual and nonromantic relationships and considers them equally as important as sexual and romantic relationships.

As an asexual person, please?

I also strongly object to the idea that the most standard and basic way for humans to relate to each other is sexually, or even romantically. So would every other asexual or aromantic person I know. So would all the heterosexual and homosexual people I know. (BTW the word you're looking for is "allosexual", aka you DO experience sexual attraction of some kind, regardless of orientation.)

I'll preface this with the fact that I, as stated, am asexual, yet I still consider myself straight. Among other reasons, I am heteroROMANTIC and do plan on marrying a member of the opposite sex. I can go into this more if you like.

To clarify because it's been an issue of confusion before: asexuality and demisexuality do NOT mean "I don't want to have sex until I know a person / am married." That is standards and/or boundaries, worldview and/or ideology and/or religion. Anyone can have those. If you have religious convictions, I'm sorry, that doesn't make you asexual or demi. Those labels means you experience little (in the case of demi) or no sexual ATTRACTION.

I cannot, for the life of me, figure out from looking at a guy if he's "hot" or "cute" or anything else. Many times I told someone "I'm considering this guy romantically" and the first question was "ooohh, is he cute?" To which my response was, without fail: "I dont know, you tell me [show picture]". Eventually, when they all said "oohhhh he IS cute!!" I would sigh and say, "so I've been told." I can also extrapolate from information: e.g. if a guy is tall, has a lot of muscle, etc? Okay he's probably conventionally attractive. I feel nothing, emotionally or physically, from looking at such a guy. I am not irresistibly drawn to him. I do not crave his presence, approval, or favor just because he looks a certain way.

I feel zero attraction. No desire to know what they'd be like in bed or kiss them or anything else. The most I've ever cared about a guy's physical appearance has been "hmmm I wonder what his beard feels like." I have not taken the liberty of finding this out with anyone except my father. Perhaps it might be more accurate to say, "I wonder what ANY beard feels like" because my curiosity is now sated and I have no particular interest in finding out more from any other guys.

I apologize if I am miserably failing to describe sexual attraction. I've never experienced it, see. Feel free to (politely) correct any misunderstanding.

But I do NOT, in any sense, imagine that allosexual people's only important relationships are sexual. I (a "straight" cis woman) have a strong, healthy, awesome and amazing relationship with my father, with my brother, and with my other brother. I have a close and fond relationship with my other two brothers, with a male friend I met at school and with another male friend I met at school. I have a competitive, intellectually rich relationship with almost all of the above plus a male friend I met at a social gathering. I have a nerdy and awesome relationship with a male friend I met at that social gathering and with another male friend I met at that social gathering. I have a teasing/rivalrous relationship with an older man I met at church. I have made good friends with another older man I met at church and with another older man I met at church and with an older man I met at that social gathering. To say nothing of my female friendships.

None of those are sexual. Three are near enough my age and interests that I have considered them romantically (perhaps four depending on how you count) but the relationships themselves have not become romantic and I experience no sexual or any physical attraction towards them (despite some(?) of them being conventionally attractive as far as I am aware). I love my friends as friends, and value and treasure them. They are all, as far as I know, allosexual and alloromantic, and they love and value and treasure me and their other friends.

Being asexual says nothing about what the most standard way of relating/perceiving is. It's saying that, whether sexual attraction is the most standard and basic or not, we don't experience it. And no, again, sex is not the most standard and basic.

The asexual community - and the aromantic community - do the exact OPPOSITE of "othering" nonromantic and nonsexual relationships. We celebrate them. We struggle to understand and relate to sexual/romantic relationships, and consider friendships, familial bonds, and other relationships as being equally important as sexual and romantic ones. We neither condemn nor devalue romantic and sexual relationships, although we do sometimes feel abandoned by our friends who are allosexual and/or alloromantic, who suddenly get a significant other and elevate that person above longtime friendships.

Being allosexual does not and never has implied, to me or anyone else, that the ONLY important relationships an allosexual person has are sexual ones. Is a sexual/romantic relationship AMONG the most important ones for most people? Of course! They're your life partner! Asexual people can have life partners too and we understand that.

"(A-spec labels imply) the default heterosexual way of perceiving others of the same sex is apathetic ambivalence" have you. Have you SEEN how heterosexual people act around people of the same sex? Girls share all their secrets with each other, giggle and laugh about guys they consider "hot," and plan their weddings together. They're closer than peas in a pod. They're thicker than thieves. They're besties. All the heterosexual people I know are closest friends with members of the SAME sex, not opposite. Myself? An asexual? I'm very close with my female friends. Not as close as I am with immediate family members, but I have two dear female best friends. I just spent the day with them earlier this week. I've been friends with them for a long time. I have many other female friends and acquaintances that I talk to occasionally, if not regularly.

Meanwhile, it is commonly reported among heterosexuals that girls and guys CAN'T "just be friends" and there is frequently "no platonic explanation for XYZ." I think just maybe, it's not the asexuals who make sexual relationships the priority and who devalue nonsexual and nonromantic relationships.

The asexual/aromantic labels and community do not consider ANY sexual or romantic orientation or lack thereof to be the default, most basic, or standard. Most asexuals and aromantics consider themselves to be queer and emphasize that the A in LGBTQIA+ is for asexual, aromantic, aplatonic, and agender. (It is also frequently written as LGBTQIAAAA+). Depending on your definition of queer, I don't consider myself such. (Haha look at my username.) The "gift of celibacy" is right there in the Bible and Paul urges people not to get married. Since I am the daughter of an asexual woman, I have never faced a-phobia and have been raised with an understanding of asexuality, although not in those terms. Christian and/or conservative a-phobia, that many asexual and aromantic people experience regularly, appears baffling and contradictory to me. Perhaps if I had experienced the same I would relate more to the label "queer." Anyway: yeah the queer asexual community is not in the habit of treating any orientation or experience as "standard" or "basic" or "default."

If you think that "considering straight to be the default orientation" (esp in exclusion of homosexuality) makes sexuality to be the most basic and standard way of relating to people, I don't know what to tell you. Please don't worry about the a-spec labels implying this because nobody at all thinks they do.

If you're allosexual and you value your friends, regardless of gender? If you value your significant other for more than their sexual assets? Congrats, you're a human being who experiences sexual, romantic, and platonic attraction. You are, for lack of better terms, "whole" and "normal." Asexual people and aromantic people are also whole, although "normal" might be a stretch.

Footnote: I speak from the perspective primarily of a cis, asexual, heteroromantic woman. I have not delved deeply into other viewpoints because I have not experienced them.

One of the main issues with labels like asexual and demisexual and queerplatonic, in my opinion, is the "othering" of nonsexual relationships.

The labels imply that the only truly "straight" person is someone whose only important relationships are sexual; whose default way of perceiving members of the opposite sex is sexually, and whose default attitude toward people of the same sex is apathetic ambivalence.

And so what this implies, assuming "straight" is the default sexual orientation, (traditionally it is) is that the most standard and basic way for humans to relate to each other is sexually. To which I strongly object.

#Asexual #Aromantic #Aspec #Aroace #Queer #OP I love you as my sister in Christ but I've seen this post several different times on my dash and #Well I didn't want to respond because it IS a whole can of worms that is long and detailed and requires a lot of explanation #And just indicated a high level of ignorance about asexuality that I didn't really want to engage with #But hey. Prev's reblog caught me in a good mood #So have some infos! Love you bestie #Also hi prev! Nice to see you too mama duck 😇#Also just. Generally didn't like the idea of this circulating so much in Chrumblr because.#Well Chrumblr is my community too so I thought I should share my perspective and experiences #“Potential aphobia? Idk. Probably”#“Aphobia”

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katsukikitten · 4 years ago

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Part one, no real warnings yet. Enjoy!

Bakugou's personal phone rings from the pocket of his hero costume for the umpteenth causing his skin to pop. All the while Kirishima allows his ruby gaze to fall over the hot head, having a good guess about just who is blowing up his phone. Worry snatches at Kirishima's heart for a moment forcing the question from his lips, even if it meant regretting it.

"Are you sure your mom is okay?" Bakugou freezes in his step, inclining his head to fix a garnet glare at his so called friend. He sucks in a breath to yell, body tense and in a fighting stance before his phone blares again.

"FUCK!" He shouts into the night with only Kirishima and the moon to hear. The trees swallow his frustration as he rips his phone from his pocket, answering it so harshly the LCD beneath the screen ruptures.

"What?! What the fuck do you want you God Damn hag?! I'm WORKING! Saving LIVES!" It had been a long time since he had called his mother hag, long enough there was silence on the other line for a moment.

Then much like her son she takes a deep breath and now Kirishima, the moon and the trees know why Mitsuki was calling at such a late hour. Kirishima sighs with relief nothing is so dire as life and death, although for Mitsuki it is.

"IF YOU DON'T BRING THIS GHOST OF A GIRLFRIEND OF YOURS I SWEAR TO KAMISAMI THERE WILL BE NO MORE NUMBER ONE HERO WHEN IM THROUGH WITH YOU. IM GETTING OLD I NEED FUCKING GRANDKIDS. THINK OF YOUR SWEET OLD FATHER HE AIN'T GETTING ANY FUCKING YOUNGER!"

"That's what this was about?! Ma for the last fucking time I don't-"

"You don't what? One of those hoes you sleep with has to like even your rude ass. Bring a decent one home." And with that Bakugou is left with the sound of three tones and a ringing in his ear. He grips the bridge of his nose, having no earthly idea of how to get his mother off of his back, let alone find a woman. The phone rings in his hand again, the screen filled with dead pixels and rainbow lines causing him hot to be able to see. Somehow it registers his touch as he goes from memory to answer.

"What you fucking hag?!" He screams into the receiver.

"Wow. Rude." You reply with a bite, "Just calling to tell you boss that I'm clocking out, dickhead."

"I-I thought you were my mom."

"Oh and that makes it better?" What an ass!

"Fuck you." He growls, looking at Kirishima's watch, "You're clocking out way too early."

"No, fuck you. I requested to be off by this time MONTHS ago. You can ask Eijirou-san, you approved it so he made the schedule accordingly." You quip, twirling one of your knives in your hands, "Besides I've been working waaay too long today. Oh and I found that perp hours ago."

"What the fuck?! Why didn't you tell me hours ago?"

"I fucking tried, you ignored my call. This was my third attempt." You slam the knife through the paperwork on your desk wishing it were the hot head's thigh. You rise as your eyes glance over the clock. If you didn't hurry this stupid phone call up, you were going to be late. You needed to sneak in before midnight.

"Still too early for you. Normally you want the OT." He bites, causing you to roll your eyes.

Gods you hated this guy.

"Yea, well tonight is different." You'd pay in the long run for leaving so soon but tonight was special. She asked you to be there the last time you saw her and you promised.

You never break a fucking promise.

"Some subordinate you are bitch face." He growls then an idea pops into his head.

Subordinate.

As in you reported to him, as in Bakugou Katsuki was your boss. And well you had to listen to your boss to some extent and he knew you needed money, you tell him day in and day out it's the only reason you would even dream to work with him.

Although he has no idea why you are so hard out for cash.

So he sets the bait, offering you a deal you can't refuse.

"Tomorrow is your planned day off right?"

"Yea what fucking of it?!"

"I've got a special mission for you-"

"No." You interrupt, already feeling the exhaustion of your seventy hour work week stacking up.

"You didn't even let me finish you ungrateful brat. It will be three times your pay for half a day's work. Cold hard cash." The other side of the line goes silent. Licking your lips you think over his offer, fuck, that would actually help get your head above water.

The light at the end of the tunnel.

If only you knew how dark this tunnel was going to be.

"Fine. I'll take your stupid fucking offer."

"Promise?" His voice sounds a bit different, a little bit of a tease to it, as if he knows something you don't.

"What are we in kindergarten. Yea I promise, fucking headass." With that you hang up, rushing down the steps of the agency building and into the cold air.

Your phone buzzes with a text

BakaBoss: Meet me at the agency, 11am sharp.

You roll your eyes, turning your phone to silent as you watch the nightly set of nurses do their normal routine. Barely making it in time for the security guard and head nurse to make their way outside by the one way back door for a smoke. Both too lazy to walk around to the front of the hospital, sticking a thin splintering wood block between the jam and the door, giving you easy access to the stairwell. When they were far enough away you slip into the door, sure to place the wood where they left it before climbing the stairs two at a time, racing the clock at the top half of the 11th hour. The janitor would have already mopped her floor and the only nurse on floor six was currently on the ground level half way through the small tobacco stick, she wouldn't be sticking her head into room 609 anytime soon.

You draw in a deep breath, collecting yourself and forcing back the tears as you picked the lock, a skill set that not only were you amazing at but the very same skill that landed you here.

And by here you mean stupid ass hero work all thanks to some "reforming" program by Izuku Miydoria. Still it was better than having to break out of jail in order to make cash, her bills weren't going to pay themself.

You stick a stolen credit card in between the door jab and the door, right at the locking mechanism, although you could break out of just about anywhere, this would be the faster method of escape.

"Hey, sis, I made it!" You say softly but with excitement, watching as she keeps her back to you. Her eyes wide from a mixed cocktail of chemicals and trauma, she stares out into the sky, counting the stars.

It would be one of those nights where she was too warped to tell you were there. With a sigh you sink onto her mattress. If you could even fucking call it that. It was more like a box spring with a fitted sheet over top of it, you were still figuring out how you could sneak a mattress in.

"I got you something." You say crawling to sit next to her cross legged, she turns to you and it's like looking in a mirror. Except one of you is covered in visible scars and the other is not. Hers are more than skin deep. Seeing her dull gaze never gets any easier, she stares through you for a long time before she does as she always does.

Lifting her hand gently to cup your cheek so her thumb can slide over your scar.

"How'd you get this?" Her voice is barely hers and it grabs a fist full of your guts pulling them downward. Everytime she asks that question you see the shine of a blade, a swipe of a strong hand and vision filled with blood.

Yours, there's but never hers. You like to tell yourself that's what counts but maybe you had a hand in breaking her.

You clear your throat, pulling a bag onto your lap.

"Nevermind that." You gently guide her hand away from your cheek and to her lap. When she makes no motion for the gift bag you force a smile as icy guilt collects in your chest.

"It's for our birthday silly! Can you believe we are 26 today?" You place the pillow on her lap and her hands slowly go to the plush material.

For a moment she has returned, flashing you a smile as she pushing into the soft material before she flickers out again. Like a light with just enough current to wink in and out of existence.

Time passes and the clock strikes midnight, white clad shoes stomp against the polished floor signaling it was time to leave.

"I'll try to see you soon okay?" You lean over kissing her hairline before grabbing at the old, flat pillow. Shoving it into the gift bag as you silently bound the room. Pushing the door open slightly as you slip the stolen card into the back pocket of your black jeans. With that you are down the hall and through the backdoor without raising any sort of alarm as usual.

Suddenly your phone weighs heavy in your pocket as you think of what kind of stupid errand that asshole was going to put you on. The stolen card sings in your pocket, begging to be used. So you slip into a bar to give it a good use.

&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*

A blaring alarm yanks you from the bed in a sweating panic. Knife instinctively slashing the air before you send the blade into yet another digital alarm clock. Falling back into the mattress for just a moment's peace.

That peace doesn't last long once you show up at the agency. If anything is sours as you see Bakugou leaning against the bright white brick and in civilian clothes no less.

"What's this?" You pick at his black dress shirt, his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, showcasing his banded forearms. He's paired it with a pair of black jeans, one knee ripped. Oddly it looks good together. Not overly dressed nor too dressed down. His vermilion eyes glide over your figure in your black body con hero suit. He sucks his teeth, hating this next part.

"Called clothes dumbass. Speaking of we need to get you something fitting."

"For what? What exactly is this 'mission'?"

"I'll debrief you later. Right now we need to get you new clothes." You laugh in his face before your rich expression turns deadly

"With what money?"

"Calm down, it's my treat Princess." He says with satire, the name sits odd on his tongue and even more odd in your stomach. He snatches at your wrist, "Come on before the stores get crowded and we get noticed."

You find yourself in a shop filled with dresses and fancy blouses. All of which you hate. Bakugou seems to hate them too, too guady for his taste. Still he shifts through the soft silks because he knows his mother will love it.

"Oi, you can't find a single decent thing here? I thought women loved shopping."

"Yea for shit we like asshole." You hiss to him, having only found a pair of dark blue jean's.

"Heh." He scoffs, rolling his eyes until he finds the perfect top. It looks decent and it could be your style. The one thing he learned about being undercover was to not stray too far from what looked natural or from the truth.

"Put this on. While I find a necklace." He shoves the silky top into your hands and you look at the price tag. Suddenly anxiety burns in the soles of your feet soaring up to close your throat.

"Bakugou. This is too much." Katsuki stops to glance over his shoulder, this is the first time you've used his name since he hired you three years ago. He sees your hand gripping at your bicep and he watches the rare tell sign that you're nervous as you chew on one of the scars that creeps onto your lip. He comes up to you, closer than he ever has been before, your senses flood with spiced caramel.

"Oi." His voice is smooth, almost soft as he touches a ringed index finger to your forearm. You fixate on the shining black ring and your old habits have you thinking of six different ways to get it off of his finger. The thought soothes you as much as his voice surprisingly does.

"I said I'm buying, remember you brat?" The teasing returns back to his voice before it turns gruff, "Now go change to make sure I like it. I'll be back in a second."

A woman unlocks a small dressing room for you and once inside you hold your breath. Counting as you remind yourself that you cannot and will not steal anything of value while your boss was here.

If you were any other person you would tap this Prohero's account dry, really rack up that platinum card you know sat in his wallet and sell the clothes marked up for a profit later.

But even as much as you hated Bakugou, you couldn't bring yourself to do it.

Instead you slip into the the outfit adjusting yourself this way in that as the neckline says enough without saying too much. The jeans curving against your figure in such a way doing as good as a job as your hero suit. You keep your steel toed boots as you step into the small hall with the three mirrors. As you turn this way and that Bakugou appears behind you, almost earning a knife to his gut. He forces the silver blade away before pulling out a necklace from a bag he just bought. The gold chain is dainty, going through the top of the garnet making it seen as if it were a suspended droplet of blood.

It marches the eyes that roll over you as he takes a step back before his harsh mouth breathes out a word.

"Fuck."

Instantly it kills your mood as your lip pulls back over sharp teeth.

"Tsk. It's not that bad, God how do you get any pussy." You grumble, smoothing down the black blouse.

"No, dumbass. You look...you look perfect." He stares into your eyes through the mirror, his smile growing wider as they wander over your scars and finally land onto that minimalistic drop pendant necklace.

Over something you've never been able to have, something you always had to swipe from an unsuspecting neck and then pawn.

"Now. I'm going to tell you here, in this store of crowded people so you don't cause a scene."

"What?!" Anger already begins to bubble in your blood. The blades that kiss your flesh start to scream for relief.

"From now on you have to pretend to be my girlfriend. Paparazzi are starting to swarm outside of this fucking boutique and my mom follows this particular trash tabloid since they love to use me as click bait. You just have to make it through dinner tonight and if shit goes south I'll pay you even more."

#bnha bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugo x reader #bnha x reader #bakugou katsuki #bnha au #katsuki x reader #bakugou x you

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bestworstcase · 4 years ago

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On the subject of the last ask, do you think Cap was a good dad to Cass? I've seen argument her actions in s3 were not justified because she had a good parental figure so she was just being a child about the whole ordeal of not receiving a mother's affection but even though I agree her motivations were tainted I'm not sure I agree Cap was such a good dad she wouldn't want to be seeking for parent approval

w well

i think in general there’s probably no hope for the sort of people who reduce cassandra’s motivations down to “mommy issues” because my feeling there is you can’t really reason with people who are determined not to empathize with female characters no matter what - and i really do think you have to be, at the least, pretty emotionally removed from cassandra’s perspective to not see how unhealthy her relationship with her dad really was, because it. whoo. s1 did not pull punches in this regard. *waves vaguely at the linked post*

there is also i think an element of, idk, we see this phenomenon in the fandom with quirin and frederic where they are both Not Great dads who toe right up to the line of emotional abuse and imo in fred’s case step over it in SOTS, and the tts fandom has a tendency to take that and go ok these men are horribly abusive in every imaginable way! because nuance is dead.

and the captain by and large does not get that treatment except in like, very occasional cassunzel fics where he is used as the homophobic hammer with which to forge some extra angst - and i think, in a way, this combines with the common fanon Unrelentingly Terrible Dad characterizations of quirin and fred to kind of… inure the general fandom to the unhealthy way cap treats cassandra; his fanon characterization looks so much better by comparison to the Abusive Monsters quirin and especially frederic get twisted into that i think a lot of folks straight up forget that in canon all three of them kind of equally suck in s1 and all three of them have (admittedly very half-assed lol) arcs about getting better in s3. and this then gets translated to cassandra with but she had a good dad so why does she care about gothel which also, frankly, is a gross misunderstanding of the myriad ways early childhood neglect and abuse and parental abandonment and adoption can all be traumatic in and of themselves, and in combination with each other will absolutely fuck someone up for life even in the idealest circumstance.

i have also seen the variant of “well cass grew up in a palace she has all this privilege so how dare she say she has nothing and rapunzel got everything” which ignores how absolutely conditional every privilege cassandra has was, and how it was clearly drilled into her that it was conditional and temporary and could be taken away at whim. she is privileged to have grown up economically comfortable and with enough status to get away with being quietly, privately gnc in a country where that is obviously Not Okay - but that privilege could have spun around and stabbed her in the back at a drop of a hat and she knew that. hell, we SEE it spin around to stab her in the back at the end of s1, when the captain makes good on his threat to force her into a convent. everything cassandra had before taking the moonstone was absolutely dependent on her dancing to corona’s exacting tune and it could be snatched away at the whim of her father or literally any person in the coronan court with enough power to force his hand. even her *best friend* being the princess was not enough to keep her place in corona secure. like, she’s better off than, say, lady caine—but barely.

kshdkd i could rant for literal hours about this but like to wrap around back to what you actually ASKED - in s1 cassandra’s desire to be a guard is so so so clearly based in wanting to earn her father’s approval and trust, like, him letting her be a guard is the ultimate symbol of that and every time he says no she is basically hearing “you’re not good enough for me” and quite apart from his parenting and how her trauma influenced how she perceived his feelings towards her, the Fact Is cassandra worked herself to the BONE trying to earn her father’s approval and love and she, crucially, left corona feeling like she hadn’t. and i think it’s important to read her utter DESPERATION for a scrap of true, open, unearned affection from gothel with that fact in mind, because at the end of the day gothel is someone cassandra didn’t know and she can cling to gothel as an ideal, of a sort - as well i know she was an awful person but maybe she loved me anyway, maybe i was her daughter and that mattered to her deep down, because cassandra spent eighteen YEARS trying to earn her dad’s love and she feels like she never, ever measured up, which in a horrible trauma fueled way does actually make gothel the better option here, in that at this point gothel is An Idea and not an actual person.

#rta #tts #also zhan tiri is the only character in-universe who Empathizes with cassandra but that is so tangential it doesn’t rly belong in the post #but yeah pls get this woman some real emotional support 😭

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imanalbertross · 6 months ago

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I'm gonna add a copy paste of my previous post on this:

Most of the optional ships I have seen/read/heard of for Varian that are not Hugo or maybe Nuru, though to me she reads incredibly lesbian, are really huge proships. I am, of course, talking about cannon characters (You wanna ship him with an OC, go ahead. I don't have to approve but I can remember being young and wishing I had an OC to give my favorite boy-things). For the most part, the characters that are available to him are of a significant age-gap and power-gap, and that's not a good thing.

I feel like it needs to be remembered that so many of these women/men being shipped with him (though in the lists I've seen that don't include Hugo, the only guy they really offer is Eugene, so still a huge proship) are adults. Which is point number 1. No matter who that person is- Cassandra, Rapunzel, Eugene, whoever- going after the 14 year old, even after a gap of time to allow him to age, would be considered grooming.

Why? Well, largely because of just the three I named, they met him as a child (yes, fourteen year olds still count as children in the eyes of the law) and he had sort of a hero-worship attitude for them at first. He had a full on crush on Cass, respected Raps for being a princess and also the fact that she really thinks his alchemy is cool- which seems to be rare in his world-, and Eugene was probably his first gay crush. That puts them in a position to use that respect he has for them in their favor to gain his interest.

So, Cassarian/Cassandrian has a woman literally almost ten years older than him coming back and getting into a relationship with a person she knows had a crush on her when he was a child makes dating him in the future abusive. The reason for this is because she is leveraging this information to get a relationship based on a child’s feelings, which is super creepy. If this was a male YouTuber and a fan, you wouldn’t be shipping this.

Rapunzel is a princess, and knew she was when she met him, so she gets the Cass rundown plus the fact that the power balance between them is insane. Let not even mention the fact that those two are so high in the sibling vibes category that it makes it an extra step of creepy. And is anyone actually shipping Eugene with him? I kind of feel like that’s a fake ship that angry people use as an example of why we shouldn’t have gays in kids’ shows.

The second point is that most of the other characters that end up on those lists are either small children- like 10-12, and he’s 14-16. I don’t know if you know this, but Varian is kind of an exception to the rule, when it comes to 16 year olds hanging out with younger kids. He’s still learning to friend, which is how he ends up with such a diverse group of friends.

I’ve seen Vex in these lists, and she barely wanted anything to do with the main group, and Varian’s villain schtick wasn’t who he really was. We all have a villain arc as people, and seldom is it the person we long to be or would be on purpose if given the choice. Usually, like Varian, we end up pretty ashamed of that part of our lives. But the characters listed that don’t know him probably wouldn’t want that kind of a relationship with him, nor would they be likely to hold similar desires and ideals- this kind of thing can be a deal breaker in relationships.

This said, we also kind of need to talk about leaving Hugo off the list. Is this because he’s from a program that was denied by Disney? Possibly, but it needs to be said. If you want to post about partners for Varian, you need to state “out of the canon characters” because, honey, there are so many non-canon choices. Hugo is just the one that the writers chose. Which is kind of important too, since they built him. They know Varian better than we do.

Being anti about gay ships but fine with straight proships is a rant for another day. But I got to a point with Cassarian that I just needed to point out the genuine nope surrounding it.

Let us ship Varian with Cassandra, Rapunzel, Eugene, Catalina, Red, Vex, Faith, Hubert, Nuru, Ariana and Lady Caine.

Everything is healthier for Varian than that unsympathetic, selfish creep Hugo.

okay. even if hugo was a 'unsympathetic selfish creep", shipping varian with a BUNCH OF ADULTS would NOT BE HEALTHIER.

lets say youre right. lets say hugo SUCKS. (he doesnt) lets say he treats varian like ABSOLUTE CRAP. (he doesn't)

shipping varian with adults will always, ALWAYS be worse.

hugo's not a creep. not selfish. not unsympathetic. do you know anything about this show?

the bottom line is that VARIAN IS A MINOR. varian should not be shipped with a bunch of adults to fulfill your creepy porn fantasies.

YOU dont have the right to age him up. YOU are sick. YOU need help.

hugo is ONE YEAR OLDER THAN VARIAN. they're in a CANON RELATIONSHIP. they're both CONSENTING ADULTS.

cassandra is MANY YEARS OLDER THAN VARIAN. theyre BARELY IN A CANON FRIENDSHIP. she is the ONLY CONSENTING ADULT. varian is a CHILD.

PEDOPHILIA IS WRONG!!

and next time, leave me one long message instead of a bunch of tiny stupid ones.

(btw you cannot expect anyone to take you seriously when youre hiding behind anonymous, you creepy sick fucking disgusting pedo enjoyer)

#varian tts #hugo tts #varigo tts #varigo vat7k #vat7k #cassandra tts #tangled the series #tts #varian and the seven kingdoms

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bisexual-horror-fan · 3 years ago

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May I ask you about your polyamory experience? Are you the only one with multiple partners or does your husband do as well? Does everyone get together and have dinner and chat, or is it more private? And if there's a new potential partner does everyone come together and talk about it or is it mainly between the person and their partners? (For example if you took on another partner would your husband's partners be involved in the process or just you, the potential new partner, and your other partners including the hubby?) I don't see it a ton and I have questions. And I'll acknowledge that not all polyamory is the same and that I'm asking about your experience specifically, but understanding part can help me learn about the whole, so I'll take any info you're willing to give.

The main types I've seen are love v's where two people share one person but don't share each other (stop calling it a triangle YA authors because a triangle has three sides, not two! Aaah!) and full love triangles where the triad all share each other. Not to mention harems and reverse harems.

Oh of course you can ask! I am more than happy to be open about my personal poly experience. Incomming Bex/Mr.Bex lore.

So both of us are open and comfortable having multiple partners! Most of our experiences, with the exception of one partner each, has been all together.

About the chats and dinners, we have had three shared partners who we both knew for multiple years and been friends with before anything physical happened. So a lot of it was very together, many a time what started as a casual hang just as friends would escalate, the vast majority of our experiences were threesome oriented, and one very wild foursome. We were pretty open about it but that's just how our friend group rolls, everyone is LGBTQ+ in some fashion as well as pretty kink and sex positive too. The kind of people who talk casually over dinner about people we are seeing, the things we are doing, show each other nudes we’ve taken and recc porn to each other kind of people.

One of our regular poly hook-ups is still one of my best friends and was essentially my MOH at my wedding, no hard feelings or anything, it’s all fully platonic now. The other one was also in my wedding party, we are still friends but she has been having mental health issues and lives in another city now and is just not in a good headspace for responding regularly, hope she doing well and I make sure to let her know we love and are thinking of her, still invite her out for stuff too. The last one has fallen out with basically our entire friend group, no real reason, she just kinda pulled out herself, not sure why.

So as for everyone being in the loop while we don’t ask other partners for approval because we weren’t that serious with any of them but we did tell them whoever we were involved with. Regular testing and protection was a must, obviously, knowledge is power, Mr.Bex and I’s main concern is with communication with each other being long term/nesting partners. So while we make sure everyone knows who we are seeing we haven’t looked for approval from other partners, just with each other.

We haven’t gotten to engage much in polyamory since getting married because of the whole pandemic crap, unfortunately, we have things we want to do, plans for sure.

So the most recent experience was this year, for a few months I had a long distance thing with one of the lovely people in the slasher fandom, ultimately us staying friends was for the best but it was a good thing, I don’t regret it and to my knowledge neither does she, we are still close and talk basically everyday, still have a lot of love for her even though we weren’t right for each other in that way. The husband was very aware of what was happening with her, how it was progressing and she asked questions about him and our relationship history which I answered happily.

A while back before we got married Mr.Bex had an experience with this woman I will call E, and it wasn’t the best experience, he was very upfront about his expectations, she agreed, it would be mostly physical and casual, she was okay with this. They hung out several times, then they had sex and she immedately started to get clingy, break boundaries and push for way more than was initially discussed, so that was quickly cut off.

Overall I feel our experiences were pretty positive, the most negative was our only poly experience with another guy, Mr.Bex’s ex-best friend. That guy was a real piece of shit and if I knew back then what I know now about the kind of person he was I would have never gotten involved with him, he almost broke us up with his toxic fucking bullshit. We made it through and are stronger for it, the one nice thing was getting A-framed it is in fact, fucking great, totally recommend if you get the chance.

Essentially, the most of our poly experience thus far, and the most I like to have, is very physically based. Romantic love is tricky for me I won’t lie, I have almost never developed feelings for people who I didn’t click with sexually, sex and sexual compatiblity is one of the most important things to me in wanting to pursue a deeper relationship. It is to the point that sexual imcompatibility has killed feelings I have had for people. I'm not fully sure why but it's just the way I work, not like I need all my partners to be perfect, part of why poly is great is that you can get certain needs met by one that your others cannot do but if the sex isn't right then I cannot open up more and be in an explicitly romantic relationship. Something mentally just doesn't click for me.

I do care for all my partners and have had quite deep feelings for some of them but still I only wanted to really actually date one of them but it never ended up happening, her loss. I would love to have something more serious, the ideal for Mr.Bex and I would be a shared girlfriend and doing the triad thing, two women and one dude is my preferred poly dynamic for sure. There is something about all sharing in that set up that is just so great to me, it really increases the feeling, amps it up a lot and is so fulfilling in a very hard to define kind of way. I am also very aware the odds of this aren’t great and would love to have a solo girlfriend, a poly V with me in the middle would also suit me just fine and would be all too happy to see Mr.Bex get a girlfriend of his own too.

Okay so to sum up and make a very long ask a bit shorter, most of my poly experience has been sharing partners with Mr.Bex in a few FWB/hook-up scenarios because that is what everyone involved was looking for, I found it very fulfilling and overall a net positive for me and my relationship with him. A few negative experiences here and there but I still love and adore so much of what happened and what I’ve gotten to do.

Polyamory is very important to me and it really just satisfies something deep inside of me, the fact I have such wonderful people around and that Mr.Bex is so inclusive and supportive of me and my happiness as well as his own, respecting me and himself and most importantly our relationship/marriage, is just the fucking best. I really am lucky, all the hard times and talks and work and communication are really worth it to me at the end of the day.

I know the way I choose to live my life and engage in polyamory isn’t for everyone and it certainly isn’t the only way to go about it, but it is what is right for me. Thanks for asking this and I hope you found it at least interesting if not enlightening.

#BHF life #Me going the fuck off about my poly experience #Spoiler alert #I like to fuck #BHF asks #fandom-trash-247 #Thanks for asking this #I have my eye on someone but it isn't meant to be at the moment #Maybe in the future #She is so great

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xiyao-feels · 4 years ago

Text

So, this started off as a shipping bingo for MDZS nie//lan; I've added the bingo meme above so that you know what you're getting into. What it evolved into, however, is several thousand words of close reading of the NMJ+LXC relationship, getting some into the 3//zun dynamics and comparing it with LXC and JGY's relationship to help demonstrate my point. If that sounds interesting to you, read away! Fair warning: as you might gather from the bingo above I am not very gentle, not only on the idea of a romantic relationship but also on their friendship.

Originally, I imagined I'd be saying something like, while of course they were very good friends and LXC grieves for NMJ, there's no evidence of romantic interest. But I wanted to look over the scenes first, to get a handle on them properly and to pick out some quotes; and what I found, when I looked at it closely, startled me—I couldn't believe how little there actually was.

My methodology for this review, by the way: I searched the entire text for every variation on their name I could think of, and then read over the chapter for chapters they were both mentioned in. I also reviewed chapters where only one of them is mentioned (that's how I caught the reference in ch 16, where NMJ is only referred to as NHS' brother). I might have missed something, or I might have read it and not registered it, etc etc. I definitely don't have JGY's memory XP But I've done my best to be thorough.

Also, a heads up: while I've done a little bit of addressing NMJ's emotions, this is mostly focused on what LXC feels, because otherwise this would be even more ridiculously long and because that's where my interest lies.

I'll state my conclusions up front, in case you just want to know what I think and not have to wade through [mumble] thousand words to get there. But it's far enough off from even the standard non-shippy take on their relationship that I really did think it was worth walking through the evidence.

It seems to me that while NMJ and LXC were to some extent close before the war, they grew apart during the war and very much so afterwards. There are a few moments that suggest NMJ might feel unusually tender towards LXC, there is nothing similar on LXC's part, and frankly their post-Sunshot interactions that we see suggest that—while LXC certainly cares about him—he does not at all feel close to him.

Moreover, his personal grief for NMJ's death, and whatever personal betrayal he may feel about JGY killing his, LXC's, friend, are not the drivers of his emotional difficulties with respect to JGY.

Okay, now the evidence. This has been divided up into two parts, NMJ alive and NMJ dead.

Pt I: NMJ alive

LXC and NMJ were friends before Sunshot; while we don't have a lot of evidence to guess how close they were, we can certainly see signs of long familiarity with each other in their later interactions, and it's worth noting that we don't see either of them having other friends beyond, in LXC's case, JGY.*

*NMJ got along with his subordinate MY very well, but except for one incident it was purely in the context of a superior/subordinate relationship, and he does not seem to have been interested in MY as a person, so I'm not classing them as friends.

Nevertheless, during Sunshot, we can see LXC begin to grow apart from him, and in their post-Sunshot interactions they start not very close and end up quite distant. By the time if NMJ's death, it's clear that while LXC cares about him, he is not emotionally close to him at all.

A brief discussion of NMJ's feelings, before I spend most of the rest of the post focusing on LXC's. As I mentioned above, LXC seems to be NMJ's only friend, and he does react to him in ways he doesn't really seem to anyone else. In the teacups scene, for example, we're told that "while Nie MingJue had never been one for humor," nevertheless "in front of Lan XiChen, his expression eased." Later, towards the end of the stairs incident, LXC is able to dissuade him from immediately pursuing JGY's death, which I believe is as much as we see anyone ever do with NMJ's anger. Finally, in ch 46, when LXC and LWJ are playing music to deal with NMJ's headless corpse, WWX thinks that NMJ might particularly be responding to LXC playing Liebing: "Wei WuXian didn’t know if it was only his imagination, but as soon as the soft, serene tone of the xiao appeared, the corpse’s movement paused. For a moment, he seemed to have stood still and listened, then turned around, as though he wanted to see who was the one playing the music."

If you wanted to say that NMJ has romantic or quasi-romantic feelings about LXC, then I don't think that would be an unreasonable extrapolation from the text, although I also don't think it's a necessary one; friendship and minor romantic feelings are I think pretty much equally fair readings.

Even so, LXC is not his priority; rather, he prioritizes NHS and (probably not unrelatedly) JGY's moral rectitude. In Ch 48, the friendly 3zun conversation only happens because NMJ was seeking LXC out to bring him NHS' saber, which he'd left behind, and when he qi deviates it's NHS and not LXC who manages to bring him some calm just before he dies, and whose features he can recognize (ch 50). At the Phoenix Mountain Hunt (ch 69-70), we see no sign that either he or LXC sought each other out, and on those occasions we do see NMJ initiate discussion with LXC it's usually about JGY's moral rectitude (ch 73, his sarcastic remark about JGY's hard work after the conference about WWX; ch 49, his interjection during the guqin scene; ch 49, the beginning of the stairs incident).

And what about what LXC feels? Let's take a close look at the progression of their relationship.

In chapter 16, when NHS is studying at Cloud Recesses, we see LXC run into him and convey NMJ's query into his studies, having apparently recently returned from Qinghe. While he doesn't say what he was doing there, it seems reasonable to infer that he was either visiting NMJ or at least visited him while he was there. (ETA: NHS also hopes that LXC will put in some good words for him to NMJ, which also suggests that he expects they'll be in contact.) This establishes a baseline of closeness from before the war, however much they drift apart during and after. However, we never see any of their interactions before the war, or anything else about their relationship; this is all we get.

The high point of the NMJ and LXC interactions that we see on page happen during Sunshot, where we see them have three conversations (all in ch 48). High point, however, is a relative phrase. In order, there's the teacups scene; there's their conversation (including MY) after NMJ agrees to release MY from his service, with a recommendation letter no less; and there's their conversation where NMJ recounts what happened with MY in Langya.

Let's start with the teacups scene. NMJ and LXC do talk, but it's part of a group conversation with other cultivators—at least three and as many as six of whom we see interject,* one of whom is another sect leader—and it seems mostly about practical or immediate matters. The exchange on the page isn't long and "Soon afterward, Lan XiChen and the rest stood up" and are led to their resting areas by MY. Moreover, interestingly, it's NMJ who asks all the questions; LXC answers him, but doesn't ask him questions in turn, or comment on his situation.

*there are two separate occasions where there cultivators per chime in

(Note also that the focus of the conversation suggests that NMJ and LXC aren't communicating extensively through letters or anything, as does LXC not knowing MY is NMJ's deputy. I don't think this is hugely significant, given that there's a war on and presumably they don't want information leaking everywhere and LXC doesn't seem to have a fixed address, but it does seem worth noting—as does the implication, perhaps more significant, that LXC only stops at Hejian when he's escorting other cultivators: "Everytime Lan XiChen passed Hejian as he was escorting other cultivators, he would rest shortly[.]")

NMJ and LXC's conversation in the teacups scene stands in really stark contrast to the conversation between LXC and MY that NMJ is about to overhear. That conversation is very much private; it's in LXC's private resting area, and MY is sitting in the presence of Zewu-Jun. The conversation is sort of about the war, but really only as it relates to MY's dream of "earn[ing] a proper place in the LanlingJin Sect" and "receiv[ing] the approval of [his] father." The very first thing we hear LXC say is a comment on MY's situation ("What a coincidence. You joined MingJue-xiong’s force and became his deputy")! He is of course going to go on to raise the possibility of MY going to Langya (to serve his father), and independently volunteer to talk to NMJ if NMJ isn't willing to let MY go. And even after NMJ joins them, some things are kept private between LXC and MY; when he asks them how they know each other, LXC refuses to answer, and then when he asks MY to answer as LXC will not, MY also refuses him, since LXC doesn't want it spoken.

The two conversations are simply very different, in a way that suggests a strong contrast between LXC's feelings for and interest in NMJ and LXC's feelings for and interest in MY. It's also worth noting, as I mentioned above, that it seems that NMJ sought LXC out because he was bringing LXC NHS' sabre, so LXC can bring it on to NHS.

Now, let's look at the conversation the three of them have after NMJ volunteers to give MY a letter of recommendation and send him to serve his father in Langya. This conversation is, I think, the high point of the interactions they have that we actually see. LXC expresses a positive evaluation of NMJ: "Look, I told you that MingJue-xiong would respect your decision." He smiles at NHS' sabre, and responds directly to NMJ. And then of course there's this famous paragraph:

The three chatted back and forth, at times serious, yet at times light. The conversation was much more relaxed than when they had been in the living room. Listening to their chatter, Wei WuXian often wanted to get a word in as well, yet he was unable to do so.

That said...well. Again, there's nothing about anything here that suggests romance, and if you look at the reasons I give for it being the high point, that's not actually very high. As to the paragraph—again, I do think they're friends! But I think it's also noteworthy that the easiest conversation we see/hear about them having is one that is early in the war,* and where MY is also present, and one where NMJ has just done something good for MY.

*MY is noted as having joined the Nie forces "right after" Sunshot begins, and to have been promoted to NMJ's deputy after not many interactions; LXC also seems surprised at least by MY being NMJ's deputy, which suggests that he hasn't stopped there before while this was the case, and he comes by in the paragraph immediately after MY is promoted. Finally, after MY vanishes after his confrontation with NMJ in Langya, we're told that "during the next few years" no traces could be found of him. All taken together, this suggests to me that MY was NMJ's deputy for 1-2 months early in the war, and the conversation of course takes place at the very end of that period

(As ever, I recommend confusion-and-more's close reading of the second scene, here.)

The next interaction that's mentioned in the text is after MY tricks and immobilizes NMJ and flees, when NMJ describes what happened with him to LXC. I think it's worth noting exactly how the exchange is introduced:

Even when Lan XiChen had the time to assist Langya, a few days later, his anger hadn’t died down one bit. As soon as he came, Lan XiChen laughed, “MingJue-xiong, what a temper you seem to be in. Where is Meng Yao? Why does he not come and douse your flames?”

"As soon as he came," note! It seems to be literally the first thing LXC says. And while it is a comment on NMJ's state, its primary function seems to be as a lead-in to asking about the state/whereabouts of MY. Their exchange as the text shows us is /entirely/ about MY, and he's clearly the focus of LXC's interest. We also have this from LXC, which I think is interesting as it shows the contrast between his morality and NMJ's:

"Judging from his words, the person whom he killed had definitely done wrong. However, he should not have taken his life either. We are in harsh times, so it is quite difficult to determine who was at fault."

Their next interaction is in chapter 49, LXC defending MY from NMJ post Sun Palace—and I don't just mean verbally, he's defending against Baxia with an unsheathed Shuoyue through this whole conversation. At this point, he still has some faith in NMJ's ability to act rationally towards MY, as he asks MY if MY hadn't told NMJ about his being the spy, and NMJ displays familiarity with LXC, knowing that he rarely interrupted people. I'll note that unlike in CQL, LXC does not seem particularly angry at this point—MDZS LXC is almost never angry, including at multiple points where CQL LXC /is/—but overall it's hardly an example of particular closeness, and we see that LXC's morality continues to differ from NMJ's: "MingJue-xiong," he says of MY, "he was undercover in Qishan, and sometimes there would be some things that… could not have been helped."

Later in the chapter, just before the Flower Banquet, it's mentioned (possibly as inference from WWX) that LXC brought up the sworn brotherhood to NMJ, "having always hoped that the two [NMJ and JGY] would reconcile." Obviously we can infer things about their closeness from the fact that LXC does in fact swear brotherhood with NMJ, but we have no direct textual statement as to why he wanted to swear /himself/ to NMJ, be that personal or political or both.

Next comes the Flower Banquet. NMJ seeks JGY out, first, for his usual concerns with JGY's moral rectitude. Shortly after, LWJ and LXC come over; shortly after that, JC and WWX come over, though they soon move on. There are two things I want to note here. First, it's the only time we see LXC seek NMJ out (and one of only two times we see one of them seek the other out—the other will be in ch 73, after the conference about WWX, when NMJ comes over to him and JGY talking). Second, this is the only time we see LXC respond to NMJ verbally post-Sunshot in a way that isn't about defending someone, either JGY (the usual case) or WQ (at the conference in ch 73)—although it is to some degree a defense of WWX, and it's not quite directly in reply to NMJ, as NMJ and LWJ have a brief exchange on the subject first. These positive signs will not occur again, and I think it's significant that this is the earliest post-Sunshot scene we see.

The next scene for this analysis (chronologically speaking; it's in an entirely different chapter) is the Phoenix Mountain Hunt. Although we see NMJ and LXC arrive to the hunt in ch 69, NMJ arrives after the Twin Jades have started slowly riding into the distance and we don't actually see them interact at all; nor do we see them together in ch 70, the rest of the hunt. Moreover, there doesn't really seem to be any suggestion that they /did/ interact. When JGY says he's not sure if he'll be able to expand the hunting ground in two hours, LXC asks him why, instead of saying something like "oh right da-ge was doing all that hunting too." Moreover, when JGY answers him ("not only did Young Master Wei keep a third of the prey to himself, our eldest brother has eliminated over half of the fays and the monsters as well"), LXC's response doesn't indicate that he saw NMJ earlier, or knew what he was doing, though it does suggest a general familiarity with Nie Mingjue's character: 'Hearing this, Lan XiChen laughed, “That is how Brother is like, after all.”'

Now, this hardly rules out the idea that they had any interaction, but I think it at least suggests they didn't have any significant interaction, or any interaction after the hunt began. This is in contrast (again!) to his relationship with JGY—he was with him earlier for who knows how long, as they arrive on the scene together, and after this is going to go help expand the hunting grounds. They do have LWJ with them for this last, but he's helping them at LXC's request, and the framing of that request is very—well: "WangJi, should we leave, or would you like to help as well?" So LWJ can come help them, but if he doesn't want to, LXC is simply going to go off with JGY again.

If the Flower Banquet was the high point of their actual interactions on the page, post-Sunshot, then this is I think the most purely emotionally positive we see LXC feel about NMJ post-Sunshot. Significantly, it's based on an apparently older familiarity, and it's when they don't seem to have interacted recently and NMJ isn't even on the page.

The next scene they're in together, again chronologically, is in chapter 73. They're seated together in the first row, but that's explicitly because of their status, and they're grouped with LWJ and JC: "In the front row sat sect leaders and famed cultivators like Nie MingJue, Jiang Cheng, Lan XiChen, and Lan WangJi." During the conference, they have a brief conflict about WQ's culpability, which LXC leaves off explicitly because he's familiar with NMJ's hatred for the Wen. After the conference, we're told "the Venerated Trio gathered," but what this looks like in practice is LXC and JGY talking together and then NMJ coming over. LXC observed that JGY has worked hard, JGY is amused by the destruction JC wrought on his table, and then NMJ interrupts with a negative comment about JGY*: "All clever talk—hard work indeed." LXC smiles but doesn't reply. JGY tries to change the subject by asking LXC where LWJ is, and LXC gestures to the front, where LWJ and Mianmian are finishing up their conversation. NMJ compliments Mianmian, and JGY agrees. That's the end of the scene. I noted for the Flower Banquet that that scene unusually involves LXC replying verbally to NMJ in a way that isn't /just/ about defending someone; here, LXC does not speak a single word after NMJ joins them.

*In the interests of not being unfair I will note that NMJ did observe JGY lie; this doesn't really matter to the NMJ-LXC stuff except that it's a lie that LXC would also have noticed, as it involved contradicting LWJ.

NMJ and LXC are once again in the same scene in ch 78, for the swearing ceremony, and even speak one after the other. However, they don't seem to interact in any way, and their speech seems to be an important sect leader thing; we're told of their responses to JGS' toast, and then JC is explicitly contrasted in not speaking:

Nie MingJue, “May their souls live on.”

Lan XiChen, “Rest in peace.”

Jiang Cheng, however, still had on a darkened expression. He didn’t say anything even after he poured the wine.

Now we're back in the Empathy chapters, after a not insignificant gap: the next scene is the guqin scene, in chapter 49. Although LXC is playing guqin in the Unclean Realm, and is going to offer to teach JGY the Song of Clarity which he can use on NMJ, LXC and NMJ barely interact at all—they only have one very brief exchange, where NMJ objects to LXC teaching JGY the SoC (because it's leaking Lan techniques), LXC defends his decision, and NMJ realizes he's not going to change his mind so he doesn't say anything. Again, in contrast, LXC is very focused on JGY, asking him questions about his background, complimenting his playing, and independently offering to help him improve his guqin and even teach him an "exclusive teaching" of the Lan! The contrast is very noticeable.

A little after this, it's revealed that LXC left a guqin at the UR, apparently for JGY to use to play the SoC to NMJ. This is ostensibly because he is busy with the rebuilding of CR, although WWX speculates that this is just an excuse and that he "simply wanted to give Nie MingJue and Jin GuangYao a chance to ease their tension."

In chapter 30, it's revealed that at a Discussion Conference in the past, NMJ (who we are told otherwise would not have shown up, note, although it would have been an opportunity to see LXC) confronts the Jin about their refusal to sentence XY to death. He draws his sabre with the intent of killing XY, and gives JGY "a harsh scolding," causing JGY to "hid[e] behind Lan XiChen, not daring to say anything else." It seems likely that LXC defends JGY and/or helps to calm NMJ down, although nevertheless the Jin Sect has to (temporarily) give in on the matter of XY's death sentence; nothing about any further interaction they may have is noted.

Their next interaction is at the stairs incident, back in chapter 49. NMJ charges in on LXC and JGY, who are discussing the watchtower plans together, and tells LXC to stay there and JGY to come out with him. LXC's "face disclose[s] his worry," but JGY stops him and follows NMJ out. Some time later, LXC shows up at the conflict, coming to see what's happening, "concerned after having waited for long." He manages to calm NMJ down and prevent him from further trying to kill JGY, by talking about the work JGY has put in with the Song of Clarity, pointing out that he really is in a terrible situation, and urging NMJ to give him more time. Nothing he says particularly suggests that he feels close to NMJ; if anything, he seems kind of in denial about just how much NMJ is set against JGY.

Finally, there is their last interaction, just before NMJ's death. LXC is defending—well, not so much NMJ as the idea that NMJ hasn't rejected JGY completely, to JGY. His arguments are as follows: NMJ chose to become sworn brothers with JGY, which means he approves of JGY; when NMJ included in the oath stuff about "face a thousand accusing fingers, be torn from limb to limb," and so forth, he /also/ included "if one were to think otherwise," and since JGY doesn't think otherwise, he doesn't need to worry about it too much; that NMJ has always cherished JGY's talent and hoped he would choose the right path; and finally, that he's really really troubled by the saber spirit, that "[h]is anger was simply too great for him to have thought before speaking," and that JGY must not provoke him again (presumably by talking back, as he did at the stairs). As shining defenses of character go, this... isn't one. Again, he seems like he's kind of in denial about how much NMJ is set against JGY—notably, he didn't see all of the stairs incident, certainly not the part before JGY talked back—but it also doesn't exactly contain a strong positive assessment of NMJ. Forget his defense of JGY to Wangxian: this doesn't even compare to his confidence in NMJ in the conversation NMJ overhears and then joins at the Hejian front.

I realize all this is a lot, so to sum up their post-Sunshot interactions: we only see LXC seek out NMJ once, early post-Sunshot, and that's at a party. The fondest LXC seems of NMJ is one line during the Phoenix Mountain Hunt, when NMJ isn't even on-page. We do not see them spend any time privately together when JGY is not also there, and every time they interact publically JGY is also present at the party or gathering. When we do see them interact, the only time LXC responds verbally directly to NMJ is in defense of someone; if we include his indirect defense of WWX at the Flower Banquet, then that becomes 'the only time we see LXC respond verbally to NMJ at all.'

This is not of course to say that they don't have interactions we don't see. Given the time gaps, they must! But there's nothing about the interactions we *do* see to suggest that the ones we don't are in any way actually emotionally close, certainly not on LXC's part. Again, a contrast with his interactions with JGY is instructive; as with NMJ, we certainly don't see all of their interactions, but what we do see signals their closeness, mutual respect, and tendency to spend time together.

PT II: NMJ dead

Okay, you say, but wait! What about the depth of his renewed grief after he finds NMJ's body!! What about his deep personal betrayal about JGY killing his close friend!!!

Yes, I say, wild-eyed, having tried to find anything in the text for just that. what /about/ all that.

My problem is, how do I prove a negative? In the chapters with NMJ alive, LXC's presence and his interactions with NMJ are short enough that I could reasonably if lengthily discuss and summarize; that's just not going to work here (there are twelve and a half temple chapters!), not least because some of it is a matter of context or interpretation. So I'm doing two things. First, where we do see him actively upset, I'm going to show you what he seems upset about, and second, I'm going to point out places where we might expect him to react if he's feeling a deep personal grief about NMJ specifically, and instead he does not, or reacts differently.

Let's start with chapter 46, where LXC sees NMJ's moving corpse for the first time. I've seen the idea around that LXC recognized NMJ by his abs, but this doesn't really seem to be the case; it's either the shape of his (headless) body or his saber-fighting movements. Significantly, LWJ also recognizes it at the exact same time: "As they saw the headless shadow, both [LXC and LWJ] paused shortly." LXC's reaction to this recognition is extreme surprise, "almost to the point of shocked," and he takes a bit to resume playing Liebing, joining LWJ on the guqin (to deal with the headless corpse that's going around). 'Shock' is hardly incompatible with immense personal grief, but I will note that in this section he is also not described as anything other than shocked, although it is his first time seeing NMJ's body in ten years.

In a few paragraphs they deal with the corpse, attacking its energy enough that it falls back into pieces. As WWX seals the pieces back into his qiankun pouch, LXC asks him to wait: he wants to look at the corpse first, and he's described as having an "ashen" complexion. In context, though, both of these things seem to me to be about the likely identity of NMJ's killer, rather than NMJ himself; when LXC says he want to look at the corpse, WWX asks him if he recognizes the corpse, but it's not LXC who replies: "Before Lan XiChen could reply, Lan WangJi already nodded slowly." Moreover, as WWX points out, LWJ has already given LXC all the evidence that points at JGY as the killer—and also, after they do start talking about the identity of the killer, LXC shows no further interest in the corpse. This, from WWX, seems to me to sum up LXC's emotional conflict in this conversation: "Sect Leader Lan, you know who is the most suspicious person. You’re just refusing to admit it." It's not about NMJ being the corpse per se; it's what NMJ being the corpse suggests JGY did. ETA: I look at this scene in more detail here.

(I'll also note that the very first time we see LXC have anything to do with NMJ's corpse, it's in chapter 11, in the context of LWJ asking if LXC is visiting JGY "again" and a paragraph on JGY from WWX which includes the revelation that he and LXC are sworn brothers on the one hand, and LXC talking about LWJ being in good spirits and bringing guests home on the other. Meanwhile, NMJ's arm: 'Lan XiChen spoke, “Uncle has taken and examined what you brought back from Mo Village.”'

Now obviously we can't infer LXC's feelings about NMJ from this directly, given that he doesn't know it's NMJ's arm at the time, but it's certainly textually suggestive, and it very much fits in with a pattern of LXC prioritizing JGY and LWJ.)

That's most of the end of chapter 46; the next chapter has LXC, LWJ, and WWX going to the discussion conference at Carp Tower. Again, it's kind of hard to prove a negative, and LXC's reactions aren't really described at great length (though he does of course greet JGY with a smile); the only thing that seems unusual is that he seems "absent-minded."

Chapters 48 and 49, and part of 50, are the Empathy chapters. After WWX escapes from the flashback and returns to LWJ, he and LWJ start causing a ruckus trying to get into JGY's bedchamber (to get to his secret room). An audience is attracted, including LXC. Taking a cue from LWJ, he pressures his way into the treasure room; he seems relieved when NMJ's head isn't behind the curtain WWX lifts. He has—well, he certainly has a few emotional reactions, but at no point does he seem driven by grief over NMJ instead of uncertainty about JGY. At one point he "nod[s] heavily" to confirm to NHS that he's talking about NMJ. Or consider this exchange:

Jin GuangYao’s eyes still held tears, but appeared as if they were red with anger. He clenched his hands into fists and shouted with both grief and resentment, “Dismembered… Dismembered! Who in this world could’ve done such an insane act?!”

Lan XiChen shook his head, “I do not know. When we were searching for the head, the clues disappeared.”

Now obviously JGY is acting—but he's acting the role of someone who /is/ personally mourning NMJ, and he's showing more anger than LXC ever does about it. Now—to be fair, MDZS LXC gets angry even less than CQL LXC, who is hardly an angry person. But there are a few times we do see him angry—certain moments confronting JGY in the temple, in the temple courtyard when he's angry at WWX for how he's treated LWJ—and what happens to NMJ's body, never mind the fact of the death itself, doesn't seem to make the list.

In chapter 63, WWX wakes up in CR, having been recovering for four days. In this chapter and the next two, LXC becomes increasingly distressed as they discover the Song of Turmoil and the evidence seems to weigh against Jin Guangyao, enough that it's not really feasible to review every instance of it. Nevertheless, there are a couple of parts I think it's worth looking at directly.

In chapter 64, we get something extremely valuable: LXC's statement of his own emotional quandary.

Lan XiChen supported his head on his hand. His voice was low, as though he was trying to hold something back, “WangJi, the version of Jin GuangYao that I know is entirely different compared to the version that you know and the version that the world knows! Throughout all these years, in my eyes, he has always been… enduring his suffer, caring for all people, treating everyone with respect. I have always believed, without a doubt, that the criticism he received from others all came from misunderstandings, that what I knew how he truly is. Now, you want me to believe, at once, that everything about this person is fake, that he planned to kill one of his sworn brothers, that I was also a part of his plan and even helped him… Could you please allow me some more discretion before I make my own judgement?”

So, what is he distressed by here? It's quite clearly the idea that he /doesn't/ know JGY, that the JGY he knows is fake, a falsehood, and relatedly that their relationship is not as he understands it ("that I was also a part of his plan and even helped him"). JGY killing NMJ is obviously what inspires this crisis, but it's not at all what's centered in his speech here, and even the half-sentence mention that it gets doesn't frame it at all in terms of NMJ's relationship to LXC. "He planned to kill one of his sworn brothers," he says, not "our sworn brother" or "my sworn brother" or even "my friend."

(The paragraph immediately following reads to me more like WWX's conclusions than narrative certainty, but either way, it's not about his personal relationship with NMJ: "Lan XiChen had taught Jin GuangYao the Song of Clarity, keeping in mind the grudge between Jin GuangYao and Nie MingJue, hoping that they could be how they used to be. He requested Jin GuangYao to help calm Nie MingJue in place of him. Who would’ve known that his kindness made possible Jin GuangYao’s cruelty? How should he face himself now?")

Later in the chapter, there's the famous section where he tells WWX about his and LWJ's parents' story. I do think part of this is about telling WWX something about LWJ (although not that LWJ has feelings for him, which MDZS LXC thinks he already knows), but it's also pretty transparently about his own uncertainty re: JGY.

He paused before speaking again, “Young Master Wei, can you understand why he did such a thing?”

Wei WuXian answered after a moment of silence, “He could neither forgive the one who killed his teacher nor watch the death of the woman who he loved. He could only marry her to protect her life and force himself not to see her.”

Lan XiChen, “Do you think that this was right?”

Wei WuXian, “I don’t know.”

Lan XiChen looked somewhat lost, “Then, what do you think would be right?”

Wei WuXian, “I don’t know.”

A while later, [Lan Xichen speaks again, in a whisper]

He spoke, “Madam Lan must’ve been a very gentle woman.”

Lan XiChen, “In my memories, Mother had indeed been so. I do not know why she did such a thing back then. And, in truth, I…”

He took in a deep breath before confessing, “Do not want to know either.”

It's not what you might call subtle.

But it's also worth noting, I think, exactly what LXC focuses on telling the story. It was one of his father's teachers that his mother killed—and while that is absolutely a very important position, and obviously would have mattered and indeed did matter to QHJ a great deal—that's literally all the information we get about him, that he was QHJ's teacher. He lingers on why QHJ did what he did, and whether it was the right thing; he talks about the crime his mother committed, and his response to that. He does not focus at all on the teacher, the clear NMJ-analogue in this scenario. He's not QHJ's beloved teacher, or his favourite teacher, or anything like that—he's not even just "his teacher," he's "one of his teachers." And maybe that's all the information he has about him, but he doesn't linger on that question either! Again, there's nothing here to suggest that his conflict is about his personal connection with NMJ.

ETA: I actually missed something here. Thanks to some critique in the notes (and which I discuss more extensively in the post linked at the bottom of the page), I looked at the Chinese here, and the word LXC uses for teacher is 恩师, which Pleco gives me as “mentor; one’s kind and respected master (or teacher).” So on the one hand, that's not nothing. On the other hand, the point remains that it's only one word, LXC isn't adding lots of adjectives on to describe the teacher, and as I mentioned in the previous paragraph, simply doesn't linger on the teacher in his conversation with WWX; the focus is elsewhere. I think the point as a whole stands.

Now to the temple chapters. I think it's fairly well-known, at this point, that he doesn't bring up NMJ to JGY in the temple chapters, but I'm going to point it out again—he doesn't bring up NMJ to JGY in the temple chapters! And this is, I feel, even more significant in MDZS, where he's seen NMJ's fierce corpse. That said, there are a few instances where he reacts to NMJ/NMJ's corpse; I'm going to look at all of them.

First of all, in ch 104 when WWX says "Looks like being called the son of a prostitute is really Sect Leader Jin’s weak spot. No wonder you killed ChiFeng-Zun," we're told that "With the mention of Nie MingJue, Lan XiChen’s expression changed." No further details are provided; we don't know what it changes into, and the only hint we have as to what it changes /from/ is that LXC's last described reaction, only two paragraphs previous, was calling "Sect Leader Jin" because he knew JGY was about to fuck with JC. Also interestingly, LXC does /not/ have any reaction described when JGY and JC have the "isn't it hard being your shixiong/isn't it even harder being your sworn brother" exchange, earlier in chapter 101. Perhaps his reaction is simply not noted by the text—it seems unlikely he has literally zero reaction to it—but if we're looking for a difference, it seems like it's either the explicit reference to killing NMJ, or the reminder of NMJ calling JGY the son of a prostitute.

Second, there's the moment NMJ('s fierce corpse) shows up (ch 106). He, JGY, and NHS all say "Brother." JGY and LXC's responses are one paragraph after the other, and the punctuation is the same: "… Brother."* Meanwhile, NHS reacts first, a few paragraphs earlier, and he cries out, "Brother!!!" We're told that "[their] three tones were drastically different," which is interesting as well. NHS seems in the grip of some strong, active emotion—excitement? grief? We're explicitly told that JGY is scared. Whatever LXC's tone is, it's hard to say—but it's not like NHS'.

*(In the original text it looks like LXC's is "…Brother." and JGY's is "…Brother...", but either way they're significantly more similar to each other's than either is to NHS'.)

Thirdly and finally, when the Jin cultivators are fighting NMJ's corpse (ch 107), NHS peers out from behind LXC's back and calls out to NMJ ("both frightened and eager"), leading NMJ to charge at them. LXC stops him by playing Liebing, then then tries to get him to recognize identifying NHS ("Brother, this is Huaisang!"); the latter unfortunately does not work, NMJ being totally overcome by resentful energy. This section does actually have some evidence of grief: when he plays Liebing, it's described as "with a sob of Liebing."

He'll continue to try and deal with NMJ's corpse, notably with LWJ and WWX, but those three moments are the only times he reacts to NMJ (as NMJ, as opposed to as a fierce corpse that needs to be dealt with). That's not a lot, and each moment is very brief, not to mention fairly ambiguous about LXC's emotional reaction. If he /was/ being driven by his grief for NMJ's death, you would think we'd see more of it.

Furthermore, there's one moment I think it's important to pull out as explicitly not about NMJ. LXC tells JGY (and had told him previously) not to call LXC er-ge, /not/ because he killed da-ge (which you might expect!) but because of the second siege: “Sect Leader Jin, I have already said, when you went your own way to scheme such havoc at Burial Mound, that there was no longer the need to call me ‘Brother.’”

Now, to be clear, it's not that LXC's reactions to things just aren't described in the temple sequence in general. Obviously we see him react when he's telling LWJ about WWX's feelings, but even beyond that, even when he's occupying a more background role in the narrative, we're given his reaction quite a few times. He sighs when LWJ seals his spiritual powers (ch 100); he tends to NHS, covering with his outer robe (ch 102), comforting him when he's disturbed at the sight of the coffin (ch 103), protecting him from SMS (after NHS frames him for stabbing him, ch. 107) and from NMJ (ch 107), and comforting him and giving him pain medicine about the wound in his leg (ch 108); along with LWJ, he's distressed by the sound of JC's sword-scraping technique against JGY's music (ch 101); he tries to warn JC a couple of times when JC is fighting JGY (ch 101), cautions JL (ch 101) and later JC (ch 102) about worsening JC's injuries, and along with JL, WWX, and LWJ freezes when JC slaps JL to the ground (ch 102); he asks Minshan why he's being rude to LWJ, and a little later, with SMS and JL, pauses in astonishment when LWJ laughs (ch 100); he averts his gaze from and seems perhaps embarassed by the ghosts that WWX summons (ch 104); he calls out to WWX to remind him that his current body is closely related to JGY, and will therefore attract NMJ's fierce corpse (ch 107). He actually has a couple of entertaining reactions to Wangxian being Wangxian: he coughs and tells WWX it is maybe not the best time and place for this when WWX is about to repeat "I really wanted to sleep with you," and then later he and Jin Ling inexplicably! move their sitting cushions far away from Wangxian's and gaze into the distance (ch 100).

And more than anything else—in what I think is a very instructive contrast—he reacts to JGY, in a way that reflects an ongoing continual emotional investment. He is, quite notably, consistently worried about JGY and unable to stand the sight of him in pain, even when he thinks he shouldn't be. When the coffin trap goes off, and they overhear Jin cultivators wailing and a pungent smoke emerges, there's worry in LXC's eyes; after JGY and Minshan make it out, and JGY takes some medicine against the poison, LXC hesitates for a moment and then asks what happened (ch 103). After LWJ cuts JGY's hand off—which means /after/ he's taken JL hostage, note—LXC "seemed as though he wanted to help him for an instant," though "in the end he dared not" (ch 106). When Minshan asks him for medicine for JGY, seeing how terrible JGY looks, he hesitates slightly before they're interrupted by NMJ's success fighting the Jin cultivators (ch 107). After they've defeated NMJ, he treats JGY's wrist; moreover, "Seeing that Jin GuangYao almost passed out from the pain, Lan XiChen, who in the beginning wanted to use this to punish him, still didn’t have the heart to bear it," and goes for the pain-relief medicine from NHS. And this is all not even accounting for his reactions to JGY either during his questioning of JGY or post-stabbing!

And what about when he's distressed by JGY? When he's reacting with upset or anger? There seem to be two consistent threads: first, that JGY did awful things/hurt people /not/ under constraint, and second, the idea that he doesn't know JGY after all and their relationship was a lie.

For the first, he calls out Sect Leader Jin when JGY starts in on JC after JC calls him the son of a prostitute (ch 104), although notably he does not do the same in their earlier confrontation when JGY is distracting JC in order to defeat him, only warning JC (ch 101); when JGY confesses to having burned down the brothel, he's distressed when JGY says that it wasn't entirely to remove the traces (ch 105); he becomes /less/ angry about the second siege and about QS when it turns out that he was operating under constraint in those conditions (ch 106); and of course, the thing he's angriest about is JGY killing his father, "and even in such a way" (ch 106). In ch 103, looking down at the coffin he is shocked that JGY buried something that caused such horror to its surroundings, but without further information about JGY's reasons this does not metamorphose into anger.

For the second, when WWX him asks why there's no light shining from Shuoyue, he tells him "It's quite a shame," and that he "was fooled by lies" and had his cultivation sealed (ch 99); when JGY assures him that he'll let him and NHS go without harm when the time comes, he asks if he should believe him (ch 100); when JGY asks if LXC isn't going to ask him /why/ he set the fire (since it wasn't entirely to erace the traces), we have this important excerpt (ch 105):

“In the past, it was not that I did not know what you did, but that I believed you had your reasons behind doing them.”

He continued, “But, you have done too much. And I… no longer know if I should believe you.”

Fatigue and disappointment sunk heavily into his tone.

And then after JGY takes JL hostage (ch 106), this one:

Lan XiChen spoke slowly, “Sect Leader Jin, you lied again.”

Jin GuangYao, “Just this once. There’ll be no next time.”

Lan XiChen, “This was what you said last time. I can no longer tell which of your words are true.”

LXC asks him about the letter in the first place because "whenever he heard there might be hiddenmight hidden reasons, he just had to hear it" (ch 105); when WWX challenges him before he tends to JGY's wounds, he says "Many things still remain unanswered" (ch 108).

His upset at JGY "attacking" him is in ch 108, I think, a combination of the two—in CQL, it reads more like he's angry that JGY took an action that made him need to attack JGY than anything else, but in MDZS he experiences it as a real betrayal: "As he saw Nie HuaiSang’s expression along with the warning, he felt something in his heart go cold." Because it would have been one; it's a line that JGY hasn't crossed, and as it turns out it's a line that JGY hadn't crossed, and would never.

And lastly, after JGY's death, we have once again LXC's explicit statement of his difficulties—and while LXC's post-stabbing difficulties could be different from his pre-stabbing ones, it's at least an important consideration, and it is in line with the rest of what we see:

“… Just what does he want to do? I once thought I knew him well, and then I realized I did not. Before tonight, I thought I knew him well once more, but now I do not.” Nobody could give him an answer. Lan XiChen repeated in frustration, “Just what does he want to do?”

Looking over the evidence, he's hurt and angry that JGY would do awful things not under constraint, and about the idea that he doesn't know JGY after all/their relationship is a lie. I do think it's unlikely that he's zero percent upset about JGY contributing to NMJ's death—I tend to think they talked about if offscreen, between LXC leaving with him from Gusu and WWX finding them in the temple, and that's why LXC doesn't bring him up in the temple sequence. But whatever he's feeling, his reactions to JGY don't seem to be about his own personal grief for or relationship with NMJ, and if they /had/ been about that I think there's several moments in the temple that would have played out differently.

One last note: I see often the idea that LXC going into seclusion after JGY's death is for his grief about /both/ his sworn brothers. At this point, you're probably unsurprised to learn that I don't think the evidence supports this. Not only, again, do we have very little evidence of his personal grief for NMJ post-timeskip—ten years past NMJ's death!—even after NMJ shows up again, but there's a distinct change in him after JGY dies. Before that, he's obviously distressed, but he's still tracking and on top of things; afterwards, on the other hand, we're told that "If it were the usual ZeWu-Jun, he couldn’t have failed to fathom [what WWX was suggesting the letter be intended to cause]. But right now, it was likely he had no more space in his mind to think" (ch 109), which tracks pretty well with his absent-mindedness at the banquet a few months down the line (ch 116). Nothing about LWJ's discussion with WWX of LXC's state suggests it's at all precedented (ch 115), and in fact when LQR talks to him immediately after JGY dies, we're told that "Lan XiChen’s face was full of an unspeakable grief" and that "Lan QiRen had never seen Lan XiChen, a child he single-handedly brought up, look so agitated and discomposed" (ch 110). JGY's death is a breaking point; NMJ's death, at the time or now, simply is not.

In conclusion, while he was certainly friends with NMJ pre-Sunshot, and that is genuinely rare for LXC, they began to grow apart during Sunshot; and while LXC continued to care for NMJ, he was not at all intimate with him, and showed no sign of particularly enjoying or seeking out his company. Later, while he is certainly disturbed at the idea that JGY might have killed NMJ, this is because it suggests that he /doesn't/ know JGY after all, and his reactions to JGY then and at the temple are not driven by his personal grief for or relationship with NMJ, nor is his seclusion in any way related to his feelings for NMJ.

ETA: All quotes taken from the Exiled Rebels translation.

ETA: I discuss some critique of this by @/hqfeels here.

#ship negativity cw #ship meme #I'm done!!!#good fucking god this took me a month #that damn bingo post #long meta #profound philosophical differences #anger burned in his heart #the best of men #a gentle warmth filling the deepest of needs

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echo-three-one · 4 years ago

Text

Run run run....

Table of Contents

Previous Chapter : Going Dark - Part 1

Chapter 23 to another story made by Ray (echo-three-one) Comments and Reviews appreciated! I hope you enjoy! Love you all ❤️

Going Dark - Part 2

John "Soap" MacTavish

London, United Kingdom

Soap never knew that the bloody guy would pull that trick off his sleeve. He's been sick of the same ringing he first experienced when they went out with Francine.

So he did what he could and quickly got up to his feet as soon as he saw Alex attempt to halt the hostage on his tracks. That bastard's going to pay for stomping on Alex like that.

With comms down once again, he had to act fast, stomping down the stairs, never leaving sight of the runner. He could sense someone following him and assumed it's any of Roach, Price or Jack. And it looked like Ghost caught wind of what happened too.

"Oi! Let's flank him!" Soap roared across the empty streets as Ghost and Roach split ways and ran toward their target.

They're not kidding when they said the Shadow Company is at par with the 141, the guy ran like a horse which Soap never expected from his build. He could see Ghost and Roach sprinting from his sides, one wrong turn and he's done for, but he still had one last trick.

He raced to the emergency stairs as his heavy feet clanged against the metal. Soap followed, optimizing the steps on edges to gain on him. Going up the rooftops was his biggest mistake.

"Bollocks, he's still running!" he announced as he felt his ears crackling.

"Well…. st….by…. do….airs.." His earpiece crackled through the static. It's recovering but they're already far off MacMillan's truck where their line connected.

He leaped. Soap almost stopped in his tracks as the runner courageously leapt across the huge gap and rolled on to the next building. He braced himself and continued dashing across the roof and did a mighty leap, his arms circled like he was swimming and he carefully placed his feet to perform a proper land and rolled.

That's going to hurt as soon as the adrenaline fades, but he quickly got up and made use of his remaining burst of energy.

The runner stopped in his tracks as soon as Roach emerged from the opposite fire escape, raising a pistol pointed straight at him as he raised his hand in surrender.

"Nowhere to run now." Roach said, cautiously walking near him. He's aware that his phone is still inside his pocket and that they had no idea when it'll go off again.

He didn't talk, but he looked panicked. He was sweating all over and his face was beyond recognizable. It looked like he's out of options.

"Tell us Where Shepherd is…" Gary pointed the loaded gun on his head, the desperation in Gary's eyes were obvious.

"There's an abandoned plane graveyard near Afghanistan…" he whimpered. His voice was shaky enough to warrant the truth.

"What's he doing there?" Soap added.

"He's trading the blueprints for the I.P. Address… Please that's all I know" he begged and they quickly left the place, walking back to MacMillan's car.

"You got something?" Ghost asked as soon as Roach's feet landed on the dark alley.

"A place. In Afghanistan." Roach answered.

"And he also had the I.P. Address.." Soap added.

"But that's impossible… didn't Samantha already forget about it?" Ghost asked but there was a quiet pause. Their brains almost looked like working together.

"Holy Crap." Roach finally broke the silence.

And from that moment they realized the other reason behind Samantha's memory returning. One way or another, her memories were once again toyed with.

"So how was it?" Price asked the team that ran off to chase the runner.

"We got an address. An abandoned plane yard in Afghanistan." Roach replied. Soap turned to Alex as he sat at the back of the jeep tending to his wound.

"You okay mate?" he asked walking close to his ally, who was wincing in pain.

"The guy's boots are heavy." He chuckled and so did Soap.

"Listen, Alex. We heard that Shepherd has the I P. address, did Samantha tell you anything about remembering it?" Soap asked as the whole team fell silent and turned to the two.

"Not really. What's bothered me is that she remembers everything except after when Shepherd explained his plans to her… Could it be that…" Alex trailed.

"She remembered because they undid their operation on her…" Jack continued. The whole group stood in silence.

Price's phone rang and delivered them with more bad news. It looked like while chasing the runner, Shepherd had caught wind of their activity and had some of London police scour the nearby streets for them.

"Da, It's time to go, my comrades." Nikolai announced as soon as Price relayed the message. Their ride home was compromised.

"Where to?" He asked.

"I know a place." Soap said.

TRAIN STATION

It looked like Soap's hunch was right. None of the people onboard to Scotland mind about the faces of the fugitives flashed on the news recently.

Their day packs had reserved clothes and they opted to change to something more civilian. Soap could smell the fabric conditioner France used to wash his newly bought clothes and couldn't help but miss her. If they weren't on a rush, Soap could've topped up for international calls.

"How long is this trip? 7 hours?" Price asked a civilian with surprised expressions.

"Wow. It's like a plane ride, but I'm still in the same country!" Jack cackled at the idea. He does have a different sense of humor. Just as Alex described him.

The rest of the team took this time to rest, they sat on the emptiest part of the train, away from the people that might recognize them and report their presence.

"I've contacted Samantha. It looks like they're having a small problem over there." Alex said.

"Someone saw one of us fugitives and tried to get inside the house to claim his bounty. At first they just talked him off but he's persistent now. So they decided to fly to our location and regroup there. And Soap, where exactly are we going?" Alex asked. Soap took a careful look around his team and felt nervous about his decision.

"Our old house. In Scotland. It's far off civilization. I think no one would look for us there." he muttered, gaining a nod from Price and Jack. Soap sighed in relief as soon as they thought of it as a good idea. Roach actually felt excited despite having to go there by train for seven hours. He immediately made that decision a few minutes ago without anyone's approval, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Hey, you three… Thanks for chasing that runner while we were out. Go catch some sleep. We'll watch over this train. It's going to be a long trip." Price nudged and Jack nodded. Soap gave a pair of earbuds to Price, the old man immediately looked at him with question.

"What's this? A hearing aid?" Price asked.

"Our runner wore that so it might be the reason he wasn't affected by his own blast." He muttered before crossing his arms.

"Thanks, mate. I'll let someone have a look at this." Price nodded and Jack immediately inserted with a suggestion.

"I know someone near Glasgow. A close friend of mine."

"That's great. He's closer." Price agreed and Soap slowly drifted himself asleep, trying to rest his tired legs all while also trying not to worry about Francine.

GLASGOW, SCOTLAND

The never shifting scenery of the road home sent John MacTavish into a little nostalgia trip. The sound of trains screeching across the station reminded him of so many things from the past. The road they're walking along now was the same road he's walked on everyday of his life, and now after a lot of years, he can't believe he's back.

"I don't see anything nearby, are you sure we're not lost Soap?" Roach asked.

"We aren't. The house is just obstructed by the trees. They've grown taller since I last left." he replied enthusiastically. He looked obviously excited to see his home.

As soon as they reached the short curve, a huge cream-painted house greeted them from the distance. He could hear Alex and Roach's collective oohs and aahs every step they took closer.

"When you said old, I was really expecting it to be abandoned." Roach mused.

"It is, actually. My parents are off… somewhere else." he replied leading the way inside the house. The pool was already dirty and most weeds already outgrew the fences.

Soap pushed the huge wooden double door open and was greeted by the same visage of their entrance way back when he was a kid. Same pictures hung on the walls of his adventures as a kid up to the recent photo of his graduation. His mom was always proud of him no matter what, but he couldn't forget the way she looked at him once he chose to enlist to the riskiest job ever.

The rest of the team helped themselves to discovering the inside of the house, looking at photos, sitting on the couches and grabbing a glass of water. Soap quickly gave them a tour of the house and that they're free to pick a guest room of their choice. It was appropriate that they'd feel comfortable after a tough day.

"Nice place you got here, comrade. Why'd you give this all up for a life that's always hanging on the ledge?" Nikolai asked, tapping his shoulder.

"I don't even know." he muttered and Nikolai chuckled, making his way to the living room. The team was quick to adapt to the place. Roach and Ghost already chose their rooms and he assumed they already attempted to recover while the three older men gathered around the television and watched the news. Alex was by the telephone, probably contacting Samantha. He wanted to check on France himself, so he planned to go to his room and make a call.

"The New York attack stopped." Price discussed with Nikolai and Jack, the three began speculating about a lot of things. Soap would love to join in the conversation but he decided to update on Francine first.

His room looked the same as when he left, the same shade of blue wallpaper, the same color sheets that were changed weekly and the same things on top of his bedside drawer.

Dialing her number, which he subconsciously memorized, he immediately placed the receiver on his ear and anxiously waited for her to pick up the phone.

"Hello?" her voice sounded different over the phone, but it still sent shivers across his spine as soon as he heard it.

"Hey. It's me." he replied.

"Angelo?" she asked, her voice almost sounded like she's fighting herself not to laugh.

"It's John."

"I know, silly. Who would mistake you for anyone else with that accent." she retorted.

"Do ya like it?" he teased, making sure he emphasized his Scottish accent well.

"Why'd you call?" She changed the topic. She wasn't budging on his teasing, but he knew she's already blushing on the other side of the line.

"Did Price give you the landing coordinates?" he asked.

"Yeah. Maxine looked it up on the map. It looks like a shady house in the middle of nowhere. Who are you?" she joked.

"Great. I'll see you here. I-" he hesitated. He wanted to tell her how much he misses her. But even with his oozing confidence, he felt like chickening out this time.

"Yeah. We're on our way. Take care out there John." She said and dropped the call. Soap sighed and plopped himself on his bed, deeply sighing at his actions. This girl was making him crazy… and the funny thing is he's all fine with it.

Next Chapter : Going Dark - Part 3

Notification Squad my Beloved

@smokeywhalee @samatedeansbroccoli @enderio @beemybee @whimsywispsblog @ricinbach

#horrayfic #codmw #john soap mactavish #john price #simon ghost riley #alex echo 3 1 #gary roach sanderson #whateverittakes

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