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#i've been slightly blocked all day this came to me like a vision from god
windwenn · 11 months
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Is this anything
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Lose You To Love Me
Alright, I finally got a serious one. The title is the song I was listening to on repeat while writing this. It really fits the mood, if you want to give it a listen while reading this. WARNING: Suicide and cursing. (Guys, keep your brain space health please! You need your lovely minds to be safe so you can keep shipping Klance! Stay happy so our gay-bies can stay happy!)
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Keith felt pain when his dad died and left him alone in the world. He was not given the time to grieve.
He felt pain when he was constantly dismissed as the "trouble making kid" throughout his teen years in foster care by disapproving adults and peers. He accepted the title and proved them all right, out of spite.
He felt pain when Shiro, the man who not only vouched for him but also became his older brother, was deemed dead by indifferent superiors. He gave them hell.
He felt pain when he saw Shiro, very much alive, laying on an operating table. It was then when he truly lost all trust in the world.
He felt pain when he realized that the other paladins would rather live without him. It was worse when they finally accepted him, because he knew they would all leave him sooner or later.
He felt only anger when Shiro went missing. Why waste time crying when he could just burn the world down?
He felt pain filling his lungs like tar when he found his mother. His wonderful, horrible, traitorous, runaway mother. She could have been there for him and his father, but she had left. Just like everyone else.
But more than anything, it cut into him like knives when he saw Lance choose someone else over him. Obviously Lance, who deserved so much, would go for the princess. She had everything, and more, that Keith didn't.
He let anger engulf him. He worked hard and stayed on top, letting fury fuel him. Why was he so naïve as to dance in circles around Lance for all this time?
He felt pain when in Allura's last moments, he saw how much she loved Lance. Just as much as Keith did.
Keith was done. No more of this.
You've never seen me. I hope you notice this. But of course you'll just move on. Everyone does. I thought if I let go of you, I would finally be able to live with myself. That was a whole fucking load of crap. For what it's worth, I've loved you since the day I first laid eyes on you. -Mullet
It was put safely in one of Lance's books the next day. He would find it soon.
Keith lifted the dagger with shaking hands. It was only fitting that he used the Marmora blade for this. The knife had already killed him in so many other ways. It should be the one to finish the job. Well, isn't that funny? Just another Kogane leaving everyone else behind.
He faintly heard the door to his deserted shack slam open and a yell of, "Keith! Please don't! Wait!"
Keith pushed his blade down into his chest, missing his heart very slightly. It would still do its job, he would just bleed out eventually.
He crumpled to the ground. A couple seconds later, he saw a shadow blocking the light from his door way. A hollow, husky voice whispered his name. "Keith. W-what have you done? What have I done?"
Strong, tan arms wrapped around his thin frame. Lance. He came.
"Oh god, Keith. You're bleeding so much. Don't do this to me. Please."
Keith felt Lance bury his face in his hair, sobbing softly.
"I'm so sorry. I loved you too, you know. I still do. It's almost ironic how much time I spent watching you, only to completely missed. I thought I had moved on. But I never did, Samurai. NEVER."
Suddenly Lance was yelling about how much he loved him, and how horrible Keith was to do this, and how everyone would be heartbroken, and anything in between. Keith accepted it. If his last moments had to be Lance screaming bloody murder at him, then so be it. At least Lance was finally here.
He saw black spots swim through his vision. "Lance," he croaked.
Lance snapped his head towards him so fast he gave himself whiplash.
"NO! NO NO NO no No no NO no no no no no no..."
The steady stream of words slipped from Lance's lips. The arms around Keith squezed tighter.
"Huh. I guess it worked. You see me. That's all I ever wanted."
Both of them had tears slipping down their faces now. Keith smiled weakly.
"Catch you later, Sharpshooter..."
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Oof. My heart hurts. The song makes it hurt more. Dang it. Anyway, part 2 anyone?
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ethanharli · 4 years
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Requested: 😘 i want to request, Reader is Eggsy ex-boyfriend (I guess) because Eggsy suddenly dissapear (coz his job being a spy) and no contact at all. One day reader see wounded Eggsy chased by some guy(VILLAIN) and reader help him to hide. And maybe some couple argument then room become heated and they can't help to touch each other lmao. Maybe some rough or kink to reminisce their relationship? Well anything is fine 😙
Pairing(s): Gary 'Eggsy' Unwin x Top Male Reader.
Warning(s): Slight Angst (but mostly fluff), Slight Arguing, Nfsw/Smutt, Kinda rough, Definitely biting, Couch sex, Begging.
A/n- I have never seen Kingsman and I have no idea if it takes place in a city (cause that's what I did and I realized it right when I finished it). And I'm sorry if this is bad :"(
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Pushing my hands deeper into the pockets of my jacket I looked at the night sky, letting out a long drawn out breath, just to watch it blow away in the cold air. I always made it a habit to go on cool night walks, but they always feel lonelier then they used to, mostly cause I used to go on these walks with my ex-lover. It's been about two, maybe three years since he disappeared, just up and left with no way to get in contact with him, and I've slowly made peace with the fact I might not ever get to see him again, so all I can do is hope that where ever he is, he's okay. Taking a deep breath I headed down the sidewalk, trying to avoid the people that walked by, but out the corner of my eye I spotted two people running on the other side of the street, and I couldn't help but feel like one of them seemed familiar.
Looking down the side walk and back towards were I saw them, I didn't know what to do, on one hand I wanted to see what was going on but on the other I just wanted to head home. "Fuck it" After a moment of thinking it over I quickly crossed the street, making my way down the path they had ran, cursing once again when I found a gate blocking my way. Ripping off my jacket I let it fall to the ground before gripping onto the gate and swiftly pushing myself over it, hitting the ground on the other side with a soft thud. A small huff slipped past my lips as I saw only two paths, both left and right, most noise and footsteps coming from the left so I headed towards the right, "If I'm quick enough I might be able to get there before them."
Picking up the pace I quickly darted around the corners, using my security guard training as a way to keep a steady breath and cut corners. Finally making it to a clearing I saw the street was bustling with people, so taking a deep breath I headed to the other side of the alley, seeing the two quickly heading this way. So pressing my back to the other side of the wall I hid from their vision, quickly grabbing the arm of the one being chased as he came out of the alley and pulling him to the side. "What the-" I didn't let him continue as I dragged him into the crowd, watching as the other person let out a frustrated huff, scanning around on last time before walking away.
"[Y/n]?" I instantly turned at the call of my name, about to question how they knew it until my eyes meet a familiar blue pair. "Eggsy.." My breath caught in my throat as I looked at him, his brown hair obviously slick with gel but slowly starting to fall in front of his face, lips slightly parted as he panted for breath, but his eyes had me captivated, as they always did and I didn't know how to feel, torn between hugging him or yelling at him. Yet, once I heard a soft hiss slip past his lips as he gripped his side I pushed my feelings away and gently rested my hand on his shoulder, guiding him through the crowd, "Let's get you patched up." We didn't speak much on the way towards my apartment, he mostly sent awkward glances my way but I was to stuck in my own head to really care.
So when we arrived I made sure to check around making sure we weren't followed before I got him inside and settled him on a chair in the living room. "Take your shirt off, I need to look at the wound" I spoke bluntly, still trying to wrap my head around the fact that it's him, that he's here, after three long, painful years of nothing, he's finally here. Shaking my head I pulled out a first aid kit from the top cupboard, making sure to take a seat in front of the injured male, while trying to make sure my eyes didn't wander over his bare torso. Yet I immediately spotted the medium sized bruise on his side, it was a nasty shade of dark purple and I could tell it'll last for a long while, so, I went to work.
Five minutes, it took five minutes of him staring at me and gently pressing a heated pad to his side for him to finally say something. "You're still here? You always talked about moving, you worked hard so you could" His tone was soft and steady, but hesitant and I can't really blame him for that. Fidgeting every so often under my touch, trying to relax against the chair as I tapped my foot against the wooden floor, "Yeah well, that was before my boyfriend just up and disappeared out of no where." I didn't mean for the words to come out so harsh, but I couldn't deny the anger that slowly bubbled up within me. All the pent up anger and frustration over the years that I tried so hard to forget about, coming crashing back in one big tidal wave.
"[Y/n], I'm sorry I-"
"You're sorry?"
My eyes narrowed as I glared at him, trying my best to keep my anger under wraps as I grit my teeth together, "You left! Do you know how hard it was to know I went to sleep with you in my arms, thinking everything was alright, that we were alright, only to wake up with you gone." My body tensed at the memory of that night, remembering how we laughed and kissed, like there wasn't a thing wrong in the world and it was just us two. Going to bed with him in my arms, and telling each other 'I love you,' only to wake up alone, with all his stuff gone as well, "[Y/n] I had no choice." Something in me seemed to snap as I quickly stood from my seat, the hand that kept the warm pack on his side tensing slightly, as I leaned over him, not caring about the close proximity when I rested my hand on the back of the chair, trapping him between it and myself.
"No choice? You could've told me you were leaving! I spent three years- three long agonizing years thinking you left cause you didn't want to be with me anymore! And if that were the case then why not just fucking tell me?!" I couldn't stop the sudden rise of my voice, glaring into his blue eyes as I brought myself closer to him, making sure to keep eye contact even if we were only a few inches apart. Letting out a heavy breath I ignored the heat rising in his cheeks as I pressed forward, "I spent countless nights looking for you! Wondering where the hell you could've gone, and wondering if you were alright, cause I was scared shitless!" Tears slowly gathered in my eyes as I looked at him, feeling my heart ache in my chest, not feeling the way his hands rested on my arms.
"I was told to give up, I was told to accept the reality that you were probably dead, but I couldn't- I couldn't because I lo-!" My eyes widened when he pulled me down into a desperate kiss that I couldn't help but sink into, letting my eyes flutter shut as I brought my hand to the back of his head, running my fingers through the soft brown strands as our lips slid together perfectly, and I couldn't help but remember those countless nights we shared before as I dragged my tongue along his lower lip, shyly brushing our tongues together when he finally granted me access. However my hands traveled beneath his thighs, making sure not to touch his bruise as I hoisted him up and moved us towards the couch, pressing his bare back against the couch cushions before I peeled off my shirt and threw it to the side. I practically drank in the sight of him, a rosey red blush coated his cheeks and dusted lightly over his shoulders, his chest rising and falling as he panted softly, "Absolutely stunning, every god damn inch of you."
His blush only seemed to deepen from my words, while our noses bumped together slightly as he quickly pulled me back down into a feverish kiss, my hands trailing over his torso, rolling my thumbs over his nipples, forcing a high pitched whimper past his throat that had my cock throbbing from the sound of it. "Good to know you're still sensitive here" A sly smirk was brought to my face as I leaned towards his neck, dragging my tongue up his heated skin before I chuckled softly and bit down, "Ngh!" His pleasured grunts and roll of his hips against my own encouraged me to continue, making sure to litter his neck and shoulders with multiple love bites, as my thumbs continued to toy with his perky buds. "F-Fuck, [Y/n] please.." Sitting up I adjusted myself between his legs, drawing my tongue over my upper lip as I looked down at him, "C'mon baby, you know what to do" He narrowed his eyes at me in slight irritation but he knew as well I did that he enjoys it. So propping himself up against the armrest he looked me in the eyes as he unbuckled his pants, "Please [Y/n].. I need you, I need to feel you," He panted softly, beginning to slide out of his jeans and boxers, "Please, fill me up."
The mere sight of him nearly had me choking, and I hadn't realized just how much I missed the feeling of him beneath me, the feeling of him pressed against me. In a quick motion I brought my fingers to my lips, coating them in my saliva before moving them between his legs and positioning my middle finger at his entrance, "You ready sweetheart?" Watching him nod I let out a drawn breath before slowly pressing my finger inside him, watching him squirm a bit and I couldn't help but notice how tight he is.
"Let me kn-"
"Move."
His breathy moan caught me a bit off guard, but I was happy to comply and started to thrust my finger at an even pace, letting my lips continue to explore the unmarked places of his neck before sliding in another finger, "Ngh, Fuck" His moans only spurred me on and I couldn't help but notice how uncomfortably tight my pants have gotten. "Please just- just put it in [Y/n] please!" With a low chuckle I nodded my head, pulling my fingers out of him so that I could take off my own jeans and boxer briefs, then position my tip at his entrance, slowly pushing inside of him and shuddering at the feeling of his tight walls around me. "Fuck! Y-You can move" Letting out a soft pant I slowly rocked my hips, letting us both adjust until I quickened my pace, searching for a certain spot I had memorized years ago.
His nails dug in and raked down my back, letting out a broken shuddering moan that let me know I had found it, "There! Shit-" He groaned out as I made sure to hit that spot, raising my hand to gently wipe away the tears that gathered in his eyes before capturing his lips with my own, feeling his hips jerk when my other hand made it's way to his throbbing cock, causing my core to sting when he moaned into my ear, "I-Im gonna cum" He hissed softly, now rocking his hips with my own. "Go ahead sweetheart, cum for me" I spoke huskily, running my thumb over his tip while hitting his prostate dead on. Causing his body to shudder and tense beneath me, cumming into my hand as I speeded up my thrusts, hearing his breath hitch in his throat, "In or out?" I asked through clenched teeth, feeling him wrap his legs tightly around my waist, "In."
So with a quick thrust I came inside him, letting out hard batted pants that mixed with his own, and I couldn't help but lay on his chest, cuddling into him like I had done many times in the past, loving the feeling of his fingers running through my hair, I was tired, we both were, but I was scared to fall asleep, "Eggsy.." I spoke softly, looking up into his eyes as he smiled back at me, "Yes?"
"Please be here when I wake up.."
"I will, I promise."
And to my surprise, he was.
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monstrous-beauty · 4 years
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Monstrous Beauty Text Posts
Jake: What (and i cannot stress this enough) the fuck/ sure. blame the guy who's a huge idiot who causes a lot problems, again/ Me in jail: so are you guys familiar with the cell block tango/ Apparently "the vibes are off" isn't a just excuse to leave work early/ what, from the bottom of my heart, the fuck/ what doesn't kill doesn't kill you/ yesterday at target the cashier said "your receipt is the bag* and I responded with "you too" so I've been dealing with that for the past 18 hours but I'm slowly coming to terms with it which is cool/ *enters my own password* i'm in/ due to personal reasons I will be cheating death/ *gets down on one knee* *gets down on the other* *doesn't get up ever*/ Not to be dramatic but if I don't get my life together I will die/ I have pure intentions, bitch! you can't kill me/ cop: can you describe the guy who stabbed you me: yeah he was not very friendly
Storm: Which is messier my life or my hair/ "I am unknowable" I say as I overshare my biggest childhood trauma's in the first conversation with someone/ I love laying the FUCK down and sleeping/ me: [vibrating slightly because I had too much caffeine] everything in the world is my fault/ my only goal in life is to destroy the space-time continuum/ i am a huge fan of space, both outer and personal/ Yeah sex is great but have you looked at common English words and then followed their systematic time changes back through Old English and Proto-Germanic all to the way to their Proto-Indo-European roots, whispered one of those roots out loud, and been overwhelmed by a sense of Lovecraftian insignificance as it dawns on you that you just reached back across scores of centuries and spoke a word older than civilization itself?/ but i don't have a hyperfixation i'll die
Adrienne: im so tired of this life. i want to be a roomba. i want knives taped to me. i want to be set loose./ are my prophetic visions a joke to you/ There has been a lady inside my head screaming for the past 10 years and u think taking a bath and doing yoga will stop her? U are wrong. She is a very mad lady and she will not be silenced/ Cranky because you haven't had any prophetic dreams to aid you on your quest aren't you/ i wish it was 1600 so i cood spelle words howe everr my harte destyred/ me: *hangs out with little kids and tries to teach them self love and feminist ideas*/ Pros and cons of wearing all black pros: hot as hell cons: hot as hell/ If someone points at your black clothes and asks you who's funeral it is, a look around the room and casual "haven't decided yet" is a good response
Solais: mentally i'm at least 5"11. physically? don't worry about it/ don't call yourself edgy unless you talk to dead people and have daddy issues/ im a simple gal. people raise their voices at me, i cry for an hour/ once i figure out how to hold a conversation it's frienship for you bitches/ me: *is tiny* me: (;'._.');/ no homo bro *thinks about you* thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you*/ Listen man I'm just trying to wear soft sweaters and read my books and love myself/ i was put on this earth to eat bagels and be gay/ actually Ratatouille is the dish's name, you're thinking of Ratatouille's monster. im what the kids call
attention seeking/ me gay? why yes thank you for noticing/ on all levels except physical, i am a little heart shaped candy that says "i'm all yours!"/ nothing is awkward or cheesy if you don't give a fuck. i'm on this earth to have a good time. not to be cool./ i aspire to be one of those people who is known for always smelling good and treating people kindly/ big heart energy/ me @ you: >> this is my protecting women and girls knife/ doing violence tonight so watch out if you're weak to attacks/ why did my last two braincells have to be a sad one and a stupid one/ goes to the kitchen holds a knife in my hand for a while. puts it back. goes back to my room
Mal: these hands rated e for everyone/ forgive me father for I have sinned in all the coolest and most glamorous ways possible/ "I expected better from you" well that was your fault lmao i got nothing to do with that/ im beautiful im delicious i literally cannot die i want 200 dollars/ friendly reminder that i literally cannot die, and id love to see any of you fuckers try to take me down/ Slutty in theory but not in practice/ I just wannna be vaguely unsettling, not even scary or creepy, I just want people to look at me and feel like there's something A Little Bit Wrong but they don't know what when they tell the story of the slighty cryptid being to their friends later/ Hmmm gay rights but only for me i think? The rest of you are on your own/ i say i'm gay a lot for someone who is technically bisexual/ occupation: the family disappointment/ [steps on my emotions and grinds them under my heel] anyways/ i am evil and not straight/ me: breathes parents: I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR ATTITUDE/ you ever listen to your dad talk and be like "why are you like this?"/ dont you hate when you wake up and you're awake/ oh god...oh fuck...*yearns*/ Due to personal reasons I'll be going feral/ Quitting school to become a plant who wants to join me we can make a forest/ Anyways! *climbs out of the scattered and ruined debris of my feelings*/ so what if i love you. shut up/ i ask myself 48 times a day "am I being dramatic? Is this #toomuch?" the answer is always yes of course/ *lawyer voice* eat a dick, your honor/ I may seem like an asshole but deep down I'm good person and even deeper down I'm a bigger asshole/ in my defense, i was left unattended
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