#i'm still proud of finding such a good game chat screenshot

[notandvm]

to quote twitter me "there should be more dave art i think"

[dinviataunuitiptrans]

#dinviataunuitiptrans

It's 2020 and my only resolution is to take it easy on me and go walk whenever I feel the sadness circling my soul, so this day I do just that.

I woke up freezing because the heater got broken and I know that if I stay indoors I'm gonna fall into some sort of despair so I go and brew some few cups of tea, purr them in bottles, roll up my last blunt from the stash, eat some pasta left overs from new years eve, dress myself in pretty colors and head out. It's been one hour of walking therapy so I stop by McD. to pee and then head out to the small park to have a smoke and rest my legs.

"- Futu-ți morții mă-tii de adiere băşită" is the best my brain could think of when the wind blowed away the tobacco from my rizla while trying to roll, so I start all over.

"- Futu-ți morții mă-tii...", this is my second attempt, the tobacco is all over my pants so I take a deep breath and keep on trying.

"- Futu-ți morții mă-tiiiii!!!!"

That was my 3d attempt to roll but the wind had other plans for my lungs. But then you came bye amused by the words you didn't understand, holding a pack of cigarettes and inviting me to stop fighting the wind and have a smoke from your pack. So I take one and you take a seat next to me and we lit up the cancer tubes, I say thanks and you say I'm very cute and smile. To scare the shyness away I pretend to flip my hair in the gayest way possible:

- Oh, just cute? and I thought I was beautiful, now you destroyed my dreams to ever be an instagram sensation.

You start laughing and tell me I'm actually beautiful and we start playing this game where we kinda make fun of how dumb we as humans are, I'm cracking up silly jokes and you do the same, I tell you I find you very cute also and I apologise for shattering your dreams of being an insta model, you laugh and you give me another cigarette and then move a bit closer to me.

- You're very smart for such a young guy...are you seeing someone?

- Love, you're sweet but I'm not that young...

Then you touch my hand and tell me you already like me and that I don't have to lie to impress you because you have been with guys younger than my age. That's how I find out that I'm most likely 22 or 23 and that you're just few years older than me, you're 25. I tell you lies are not my sexy kink and that I'm born in 1984, on the 31st of May. You laugh but I see the awe on your face so I tell you the good looks run in my family and that if you see my brothers you'll know what I'm talking about.

- Show me

You say that and then cuddled so close to me that you give me no option but put my arm around you while I start pulling out pictures from the phone.

- Here is Patrick, he's the love of my life and one of the sweetest man the Universe has given us. He's gonna be 35 this year.

You say we look alike but that I'm prettier than him so I turn a bit red and start feeling kind of uncomfortable so I swipe away.

- In this picture he's with Max, they are at a court hearing. Max is the oldest one, he is in his 40s and he lives here in UK but up north. I haven't seen him for ages and I miss him and his signature paranoia very much. This is Andrei, I have tons of pictures with him, we live together and he is so sweet that every time I think of him my heart melts. Probably the reason I take secret pictures of him while sleeping.

I show you more pictures with him and tell you the story when I had to sleep in his room and how he cuddled close to me when we were sleeping and you press yourself against my body and tell me you get it why. This makes me feel even more uncomfortable cuz you kinda took up every cm of my personal space but I don't know what to do so I brush it off.

- He's 22 and he might be one of the sexiest of us but he's not the youngest, Gherman is. See? This is Gabi but I call him Gherman, this is a screenshot from one of our chats, I always do this pictures when we talk so that I have them to look at when I miss them. You would say he's 14 but actually he just turned 18. He's an adorable pain in the ass but with the soul in the right place. And this is Chriss, look how gorgeous this guy is and his heart is pure gold. He's such a talented artist but unfortunately he wasn't discovered yet, he draws nudes and erotic art and it's mind fucking blowing. This is a photo with Chriss, Rami and Teo, I almost cried when I got these pictures of them. Rami represents the whole notion of humanness and he's shy just like me.

- This guy is blonde... is he also your brother?

You pointed out to Teo so I show you more pictures with him and then pull up pictures with Andreas also.

- Yeah, we have few blondes in our family but we decided to love them nonetheless. This is Andreas, not only that he's blond but he's also a very wise man. It's always such a pleasure talking to him. He's in Germany now. Just like Leo.

I'm looking for pictures with Leo so I start scrolling for the screenshots from the last whatsapp conversation and you decide to take a break from your cuddle and have a smoke. Now I feel more comfortable even though you're still resting your body next to mine.

- Here is my adorable Leo.

- He looks alot like the first guy without the beard..

- Like Patrick?

- Yeah

You see the pictures with me and Vlăduț and you like him.

- This is your brother also, I can tell. Is he old like you?

- No, actually he's young like you. And also an amazing musician and sound therapist. He makes sounds with weird instruments and then you feel a bit better. But he's not in London anymore, he returned home, he wasn't feeling very good here.

I feel you're a bit disappointed and probably thinking that you'll have to settle with me but once you get me started with my brothers it's very hard to make me stop.

- And this is Aris, he looks like an artist because he is one, he's a painter and a tattoo artist. And this is Elias, if you're ever looking for a smart conversation then he's the guy to go to. Him or Alexander. The difference is the sarcasm of Alex versus the warmth of Elias.

Then I show you Alexander and you smile and ask me if Elias and Alex are twins but I have no chance to answer because now you're handing me your phone and ask me to pull up my fb and I do just that so you start looking around while I'm getting even more nostalgic going through the pictures in my phone. I'm looking for a picture with Abel but I have no more time to show it to you

- You're transgendered?

- Oh love, there's no such thing as being "transgendered", nobody can transgender me, I am transgender because this is how I am.

- You mean you're not a real man?

- I'm just as a real human as you are love, and for sure am a man. Just that I'm a trans man

- And you're proud of this sickness...

And then you show me my cover photo.

I felt your disgust even since you said "Trasgendered" and I know very well that look in your eyes, I once had a crazy girlfriend who used to look at me just like that and somehow it feels so fucking familiar that I sense what is going to happen next so I try my best to avoid it. I tell you that each of us has its own life to live and that people must learn to accept and embrace diversity if we want to heal this human race. I tell you that body parts are just that, body parts and that gender identity is not defined by sexual anatomy. I want to tell you more but I was right and you snap into rage mode, slap the shit out of me almost poking my eye out with your nails.

- Fucking disgusting predator, man with pussy, you should be burned alive.

You walk away in anger showing the middle finger, shouting "fuck you", so I shout back that you wish to have the luck to get fucked by such a proud trans man but that I don't fuck crazy bitches anymore so you turned around and you were fuming so I told you that if you come back to hit me again I'm gonna punch you in the face. You left. I start rolling one and feel sorry I got angry and yelled back but somehow so relieved that you went away.

Dear L.,

You have my FB now and somehow I hope this message gets to you: please get some medical help you are in desperate need, and you won't get to meet nice guys like me everywhere.

I know you have serious mental issues cuz a healthy mind wouldn't let you go to total strangers looking for their attention and affection on a bench in a park, you don't cuddle with strange men and expose yourself like that.

I lived with a girl like you, extremely violent and unstable that is, for a whole year and I know that you were just looking to meet somebody that looks like a nice guy but actually hoping to get an asshole so you can have an excuse to violently manifest your pain. Been there through that already so I know the drill. The fact that you discovered I'm transgender was just the trigger you were looking for, and I didn't feel you hated me but I did feel that you wanted to make someone suffer and you found me, so it was just a matter of time until something would have triggered you.

PS: I'm sorry I threatened you but I don't like being hit. I wouldn't have hit you back but I would have called the ambulance because I learned that being a sweet person doesn't help when somebody suffers like you do.

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: Distract me Rio: ? Rio: As much as it's one of my favourite things to do Buster: Please Rio: Okay Rio: I can catch you up on what's happened since you left if you like Rio: Never a dull moment Buster: Go on Buster: Tell me Rio: Well, Indie got caught riding her dirtbike again so the garda took it off her Rio: cue the phonecall that she's kicking off and me having to go down there and basically beg for it back/them not to actually charge her Rio: got away with a warning and not inducing Ro into labour by keeping it hush hush Buster: Bet Drew was really helpful over the whole thing Rio: As if he's voluntarily going anywhere near the station Rio: or Indie would bell him Buster: Sure she will after the fact to show him what a rudegirl she is, like Buster: 😂 Rio: 🙄 Not wrong Rio: the things she's gotta do to make her Da proud Rio: let's not Buster: Agreed, let's not Rio: I'm thinking if there's been much else drama Rio: aside from the obvious Rio: Everyone kinda letting Nance have her moment, idk if that's a good thing Rio: tell 'em to up their game Rio: So, what's wrong? Buster: I can't talk about Nance right now, okay? Buster: I've had a shit enough day as is Rio: 'Course Rio: She's alright, though, don't worry Rio: What can I do? Buster: Tell me I can get on a plane right now and not have to come back here until I want Rio: I mean Rio: You can do whatever you want, yeah? Buster: Until I miss too much school and my grades drop, like Buster: End of the world as the fam knows it Rio: Not naming names but you're probably good for a minor blip right about now due to, like Rio: That bad? Buster: Nah, gotta hang onto that golden boy tag for as long as, you know Buster: It's standard. That's what makes it bad. Does that even make any sense? Rio: Don't blame you, babe Rio: Completely Rio: Fuck the cunts, do something selfish, that's what you'd tell me Buster: Yeah Buster: But you're the only thing I want and I can't come and get you Rio: I can come and be with you Buster: I can't ask for you to just drop everything for me Rio: You don't have to Rio: Still coming Buster: What about Indie? Buster: Plus work Rio: She's got School too, like Rio: What's one more for Ma to drag in by her hair? Rio: I'll worry about work later Buster: Babe Buster: You don't need to worry about me Rio: Who else is gonna if not me? Rio: And I wanna, so let me Buster: Well, I want you here so I'm not gonna argue any more Rio: If I could make time go faster I would Rio: fuck this year Buster: You do Buster: That sounds really stupid but like Rio: Babe Rio: You know you deserve to be happy, yeah Buster: Shh Buster: You make me happy Rio: Good Rio: S'a start for sure Buster: Are you serious about coming here just 'cause I'm being a mopey cunt? Rio: Yeah Rio: like I need much of an excuse Rio: completely selfish, naturally 😉 Buster: 'Course Buster: Speaking of, we should probably start planning my birthday Buster: Get your lies and excuses ready for that at least Rio: I've literally been pondering on your gift so hard Rio: You're hard to buy for Rio: What do you want, baby? Buster: You do reckon you're gift enough? Rio: For every day? Obviously Rio: but it's your special day Rio: you get whatever you want Buster: Yeah but it's not like its an important one, what am I gonna do, go vote? Buster: Everything else I can do already Rio: I know you wanna be in charge always but like, yeah, do your civic duty, boy 😜 Rio: but now you can do it legally, fun fun fun right? Rio: adulthood, babe Rio: we'll make it important Buster: 😂 Buster: Let's go somewhere Buster: Not be surrounded by cunts for a change Rio: You wanna be surprised or you wanna look together Buster: Surprise me Buster: Anywhere but Skerries, like Rio: Damn Rio: 😂 Rio: I'm on it forreal, no caravans or fam in sight Buster: One of many reasons I love you Rio: If you get stuck for ideas for my upcoming Rio: just write that list, babe Rio: not that i'm already making this about me Buster: 'Course not 😇 Buster: Only room for one selfish cunt Rio: Already competing with Halloween Rio: how many costume parties can one boy have Buster: Good thing blind folds and ball gags aren't technically costumes so you can still wear them for me without me wasting a wish Rio: 😳 Rio: Okay, and you're acting like you don't have plans Rio: Damn Buster: No plans yet Buster: Just thinking Buster: Like I said, shit day Rio: Well, feel free to take it all out on me Rio: just keep me in the loop 'cos I wanna know Rio: Who's got you so mad though? Buster: You don't wanna know, babe Buster: I'm not trying to get you mad too Rio: I do but I dont need many guesses now Rio: What the fuck's she been saying Buster: Just ignore any screenshots you see 'cause you know the context isn't there Buster: Depends if you wanna be mad on my behalf or my sister's Rio: I'm sure I can manage both Buster: You and me both, babe Rio: Not amatuers Rio: She's a bitch on such a ridiculous level it should be comical Rio: but it ain't Buster: Yeah Buster: At least I as good as told her I have a girlfriend so hopefully that's the last time she'll find her way into my inbox Rio: Be nice but wouldn't put money on her being the respectful type Rio: See if she's got as much staying power as Ryan, ha Rio: I'm sorry Buster: Hardly respectful at the party from what I remember. And what I don't Buster: So I'm sorry too, like Rio: Don't apologise Rio: It's fucked up, she is Buster: Yeah Buster: She's so smug about it that's what's fucked Rio: That's gross Rio: Does she not realise what she's done or like? Rio: fucked up power trip, okay bitch Buster: [sends own screenshots because you suck Chlo] Rio: I hate her Rio: I'm gonna fuck her up Buster: You can't Buster: She's the exact type to get you in trouble if you tried Rio: Give a shit Rio: Who does she think she is Buster: You do give a shit though Buster: And so do I Buster: She's already fucked everything up, there's no way it's happening again Rio: Okay Rio: I'll get Billie to throw some bad juju her way then Rio: Oh, babe, now I know what you mean Rio: Fuming Buster: Same Buster: Like what can I actually do? Rio: Fuck her Rio: like, don't, ew Rio: but Rio: she's seriously not worth the aggro, avoid at all costs 'cos I weren't joking that she gives me those Ryan vibes Rio: you don't need that Rio: it's hard when she's winding you up like that but try not to engage unless you have to now Buster: Right pair me and you are Buster: How do we attract these types? Buster: Fucking hell Rio: Who don't we attract Rio: so irresistible, right? Buster: True Buster: I miss you Rio: I miss you too Rio: not for long, like Rio: just sorting shit here Buster: How long can you stay? Rio: I dunno, baby Rio: As long as I can, that's for sure Buster: I love you Rio: I love you Rio: She don't know shit, yeah, remember that Buster: I just wish she knew some shit Buster: It'd make things easier Rio: Who said that Rio: Can't argue with idiots, get you down to their level and win by experience, yeah? Rio: the lawyer in you gotta stay out of it babe Buster: Okay, you're right Buster: Just this once, obviously Rio: 😏 Rio: Won't even gloat Rio: 'cos I want you to feel like a winner too Buster: 👑 always Buster: Pormise Rio: Good Buster: What's Nance doing for Halloween, do you know? Rio: I've not heard yet Rio: Some cute nerdy goodness with June, no doubt Rio: I'll put the feelers out Buster: Like, can I be that selfish? You can't be in two places at once Rio: I'm sure I ain't all her plans hinge on Buster: Not with that attitude, babe Rio: 😂 Rio: Who's bday is it again, Nance? Rio: Do you want me to stay here? Buster: Don't be an idiot Buster: I just Buster: Feel like more of a cunt than usual today, that's all Rio: Don't let her do you like that Rio: She seriously doesn't know you Rio: and she can't chat about doing Nance wrong Rio: trust me, I know who she actually hates, and it ain't you babe, promise Buster: Nance still ain't gonna forgive me though Rio: She will Rio: it'll take a lot Rio: and time, lots of probably too but Rio: even if you were a total cunt Rio: she ain't, yeah? Buster: Such a know-it-all Buster: Christ Rio: Don't act like you don't love it Rio: 😏 Buster: I can't Buster: I can imagine how buzzing you are right now at being so smart Buster: so cute Rio: 😋 Rio: Fun being a nerd, I see why you rep so hard Buster: You wish, babe Buster: If that's what you're after you're gonna have to trade me in when we go check out Harvard Rio: That's the plan isn't it Rio: if I don't hook me a prof for the daddy vibes Imma get me a future billionaire Buster: Well, my plan was to see how far around Campus we could get before I got you too turned on to resist me Buster: Standard Rio: Well that sounds like more fun Rio: you've got to focus though, so serious Buster: I'll focus on you Buster: that sounds more fun to me Rio: 😒 boy Rio: catch me packing nothing but turtlenecks and floor-length skirts Buster: 😂 Buster: Catch me planning the trip for summer then Rio: You're mean Rio: play fair Buster: I could say the same to you Buster: Denying a whole university campus that body Buster: So selfish, babe Rio: Right? Aren't you proud of me, daddy? Buster: You're learning Buster: Very appropriate considering where we're going, like Rio: Not got the cap and gown but Rio: you're a pretty good teacher, babe Buster: You can borrow mine Buster: I reckon you'll look pretty good in it Rio: Reckon I can borrow something of yours forreal Rio: not a label whore just miss you Buster: 'Course baby Buster: Whatever you want Rio: better stick to a plan tee, like Rio: could be anyone's Rio: long as it smells like my baby Buster: So smart Buster: And cute Rio: 😻 Rio: I just like the idea of having you wrapped around my body even when you're not Buster: Well now that's all I can think about Rio: Good Rio: You wanted distraction, right? Buster: Now all I want is you Rio: I'm going to be there so soon Rio: Should I get a hotel or am I making up an excuse for being in LDN again? Buster: I'll book you a room Buster: You deserve it for being so nice to me Rio: Buster Buster: Yeah, babe? Rio: If you ain't gonna let me give you at least half, make sure it's cheap and cheerful yeah Buster: Not gonna happen Rio: It's not worth fighting you on this, is it? Buster: I mean, you can, and I'd enjoy it but I promise you'll enjoy the hotel more Rio: You're bad Buster: You love it Rio: All I know I love is that I can do whatever I want to you and not be disturbed Buster: You're not the only one with good ideas, babe Rio: I know Rio: tell me more about that blindfold and ball gag, like Buster: Thinking I need some silk scarves added to that list Rio: Yeah? Buster: I know you're gonna be here soon but I'm already thinking that I don't want you to leave Buster: It's one solution, like Rio: 🤤 Rio: Won't be complaining Rio: I don't wanna leave Buster: If you think that now, wait until you check in Buster: [sends fancy af hotel deets] Rio: Okay know I'm still mad but you spoil me so well Buster: Don't be mad I just want you close to me Buster: I can walk there if I need to Rio: I'm not Rio: I like it when you look after me but shh Rio: reputation already there without proving it Buster: I haven't even started to take care of you yet Rio: I'm meant to be looking after you Buster: I only asked you to distract me and you are Buster: I'm so fucking distracted right now Rio: My specialty Buster: Is everything you're packing a surprise or do I get to hear about what you're gonna wear for me 'cause that's part of your specialty Rio: I guess you gave me some spoilers to prepare me Rio: Only fair Buster: If you wanna play fair, yeah Rio: Decisions decisions Rio: Oh, I have some cute pjs Rio: wanna see? Buster: You know I do Rio: [Snap] Rio: Adorable, yeah? Buster: Babe Buster: Adorable ain't the word Rio: Give me the words Buster: I'll try, seeing as it's so unfair that you couldn't hear the sound I made when I opened that Buster: Fuck Buster: How do you keep doing this to me? Rio: Seriously unfair Rio: Your noises are my favourite thing Rio: Just doing what you asked me to do, babe Buster: You'll just have to get me to make them again Buster: Or others Rio: I want to so bad Rio: I want YOU so bad Buster: How bad? Buster: Show me Rio: I'm so wet it's embarrassing baby Rio: you should see my knickers then you'd know just how much I need you Buster: Embarrassing isn't the word, babe Rio: I've got no shame Rio: I'm your dirty slut, and I want you to know it Buster: Good Buster: You're perfect, I need you to know that Rio: Shh Buster: I'm trying to be quiet but you keep getting me to make all those noises you like so Rio: You better be recording yourself Rio: Or I'm gonna need you on the phone right now, like Buster: [Sends video] Buster: I know what you like, don't worry Rio: Yes, you really fucking do Rio: Fuck me Buster: I want to so badly Rio: I'm coming in the AM Rio: Flight booked, shit sorted Buster: I'll get you early check in so we can go straight there Rio: Good Rio: No better way to spend a Sunday Buster: It's gonna be the best, baby Rio: Yeah it is Rio: If you decide to go to School the next day though, I don't mind Rio: I can find plenty to do Buster: I'll mind Buster: Do me Rio: 😂 Rio: Just trying to make you behave Buster: That isn't what you really want Rio: No, but I only want to get you into fun trouble Buster: My attendance ain't nothing for you to worry about Buster: I'm a nerd, remember Buster: I'm not usually missing that many days Rio: Okay, cutie Rio: Stay with me then Buster: You ain't getting rid of me easy Rio: Not even gotta tie you up, yeah? Buster: I won't be mad if you want to but Rio: Hmm Rio: Might be fun to play look but don't touch with you Buster: Aren't we already playing that right now? Rio: Too true Rio: Didn't say it'd last long before I needed your hands all over me Buster: I know Buster: I need my mouth on you too so again, not mad about it Rio: Well, you can do that with you hands behind your back Rio: I believe in you, babe Buster: Yeah Rio: Indie is roasting me 😖 Buster: Dare I ask Rio: Thinks it's jokes how whipped I am Rio: no point trying to fool her these days Buster: As long as you don't tell her I am Rio: This is where the heroics stop then, yeah? Rio: Charming 🙄 Buster: If you need a hero tell her she's gotta shut and go so you can fuck yourself for me 'cause I need to cum for you Rio: BABY Rio: You can't just say things like that 😩 Buster: I just did Rio: The sound I just made was unholy and is so not helping my case Rio: Are you close? Buster: I'm gonna need you to make that sound for me right now Buster: Please Rio: Buster you're so fucking hot do you have any idea Rio: No one has ever turned me on as much as you, or as hard as you do Buster: I feel it too Buster: Like I said, you're perfect Rio: Maybe this is why we weren't meant to do this Rio: can't stop Buster: I don't care Buster: I don't wanna stop Rio: Me either Buster: I love you so much Rio: I love you too Rio: One day, we can let people know Rio: can't we Buster: Of course we can, babe Rio: It's not just that sneaking around is hard Rio: I want to too, you know Buster: I know Buster: Me too Buster: Even telling Chlo about you, sort of, was kinda nice in a way Rio: Yeah? Bet she was gutted Rio: Should be, bitch 🖕 Rio: Mine Buster: She just thinks I'm lying Buster: Give a shit Rio: Can see why but yeah, not gonna rush it just to wipe the smug off her face Rio: though it will be a nice bonus Buster: 😏 Buster: One day I'll be able to claim you properly, but for now I'll just have to settle with continuing to leave marks that only you can see Buster: As far as consolation prizes go, it could be worse Rio: I like 'em Rio: I'll put pictures up Rio: Gonna know I'm not just letting anyone do that, even if they don't know it's you, yet Buster: I know you do Buster: It's killing me to think about how much you like it Buster: And what seeing those pics is gonna do to me Rio: Hopefully wanna mark me some more Rio: Otherwise I've really fucked the shot Buster: That's what I always want Rio: Good Rio: I like your bruises 'cos I can see and feel how much you want me Buster: Good Buster: I've never wanted anyone as much as you Rio: Me either Rio: even before I'd ever had you Buster: I know Buster: And I can't act like it wasn't exactly the same for me Rio: Even the bad kiss was good, somehow Buster: 'Cause you loved me Buster: I could get away with anything back then Rio: Oh hush 😂 Buster: You so did though Buster: Take that mum and dad with your childhood love story, like Rio: 😩😬😶 Rio: How embarrassing, lil bitch Rio: you were cute Buster: You were beautiful and you ain't outgrown it Rio: Awh, bringing all the old feelings back here 😜 Buster: You're gonna have to wait until tomorrow for a kiss but at least this one actually will be worth the wait Rio: Looking forward to it, babe Buster: Bit rude if you ain't Rio: 😂 Rio: Bit weird too Rio: in it for the hotel room or? i'm not that desperate Buster: Glad to hear it Buster: Like I've gone whole nights without kissing girls on the mouth but I'm not trying to remember that right now Rio: How do you even... Rio: Never mind Rio: not remembering, I've got you Buster: I can show you if you're that curious Buster: But it's not rocket science Rio: I don't wanna Buster: Baby Rio: It'd make me sad Buster: I told you before, you don't have to worry about me Buster: Same goes for being sad Rio: I know, I know Rio: but I still do Buster: 'Cause you're perfect Buster: How many times am I gonna have to say this Rio: Erm, I ain't making you 😂 Buster: Yeah you are Rio: Babe Buster: Babe? Rio: You're a nerd Rio: and I love you Buster: Yeah, yeah Rio: 😠 Buster: What's that face for? Rio: You didn't say it back 😥 Buster: Well, you ain't a nerd really Buster: But of course I love you Rio: Ha ha Rio: 👀 you boy Buster: Good Buster: I love the way you look at me too so Rio: Who doesn't love 😻 Buster: Normally me but you make it work somehow Rio: 'Cos I'm actually seeing you Rio: not just your abs, though appreciating that too, of course Buster: Shhh Buster: You gotta keep my secrets, babe Rio: Yeah, that was way too close to sincerity Rio: Shut me up, babe Buster: I can't Buster: I need to hear every sound from you Rio: Well Indie's packed and gone so Rio: Call me Buster: Thank Christ Buster: I thought you'd never ask Rio: I know, poor baby Rio: Practically torture Buster: I'm not trying to cum when all you've done is breathe into the phone Buster: Who am I? Rio: Who am I breathing down the phone Rio: old school pervert in the phonebox, like Buster: 😂 Rio: not the sexy vibe i'm going for, babe Rio: can ask you what colour your undies are if that'll get you going Buster: Hurry up and show me your actual vibe then is all I'm saying Buster: Killing me here Rio: I know, soz, spend too much time with that one now I think I got jokes too 😏 Buster: We both know you've got jokes, babe Buster: But there's a time and place, like Rio: That's me told Rio: Gonna be good now, promise 😇 Buster: Not too good though, yeah? Rio: Duh, I already told you, slut for you always Buster: Good

[rhosart]

I think it can be both. It can be really daunting, as someone who is starting out to look up art or see a ton of art that is just so good and so far beyond what you can imagine achieving. Just as it can be daunting to put up your art that, in real life people go "Wow you're amazing!" And you get radio static on the internet. Where someone talking about boogers or rubber ducks can get hundreds of likes/notes.

But I also, never would have kept or even started drawing if it wasn't for the support I got from the internet. I started out by editing screenshots from old games for forum signatures. Then because of an art forum devoted to Everquest I fell into pixel art or dolling and then.. I tentatively started drawing because I had encouragement. I was a teenager and my dad was a professional illustrator so I was afraid to draw. Big shadows. Sadly the forum is very dead now. This was 15+ years ago. But they had figured out a system to help people get the support they needed. Not just random commentary.

You could post a piece, whether it was pixel art, traditional, mixed media, or digital and let them know what level of constructive criticism you wanted - if any.

Which allowed you to get encouragement and praise without feedback when you just needed to be encouraged. And allowed you to ask for hard hitting critique when you needed that too.

While that place is gone.. RIP StudioMMO! I decided last year that I needed something similar and made an art support discord with some of my artist friends connected to an MMO I was playing. It's not just tied to that, but now it's thriving and I've built it in a similar way and while I believe every active member would have improved without us. I do honestly think forming support groups of artists truly helps us all.

We need to cheer for each other, and be one anothers eyes when ours are tired. We need a place with people who will support our work because its hard to get it elsewhere.

It's not a closed group but I haven't chosen to make it a tumblr or anything. But if you need support, or just a place to chat with other artists.. by all means message me. I won't be offended if you check it out and leave.

It's an active but not so overwhelmingly huge group so you actually get people responding. Most people post ESO or SWTOR or WoW art but the premise is a support group for people who do art and play MMOs. The art can be of whatever.

But I also encourage you all to build your own if that's your preference. It's been extremely effective for me, and I've watched many of our members absolutely blossom in the year since I made it. It makes me feel so proud and like I want to hang all their art on my fridge. I'm a goober that way.

Maybe it's silly. But I do believe you can use the internet to support your efforts if you go about it in the right way. However there isn't a website that tells you how best to use the internet to your advantage to learn that doesn't get overly huge and too big to be supportive in that way.

All I am saying really is. Find your creative support group. Your tribe. Be one anothers cheerleaders and teachers. Everyone can benefit from extra eyes even if you are just starting you can still have input that someone could use. My art eyes and brain have more skill than my arthands, so I use that to help others.

That's not even delving into how valuable the internet is for finding resources. But I'll stick to talking about creative support groups for now.

The internet can be such a hindering place for an artist’s creativity and attempt to learn.