#i'm sorry i'm like the opposite of sherlock holmes the other day the boy bought flowers for on our dining table

[nyoomfruits]

hello there

your fics are so so so so SO good. So good in the sense that I clicked on it randomly, knowing very little about F1 but had some bad news and needed a distraction and read all the good main fics in my fandoms and got a huge upgrade by reading yours. thank you for that.

I think you might have written some of the best fics I've ever read. Have you ever considered writing a book because I would 100% buy it?

Uhh just thanks because your fics are perfection. I mean it. Despite how it might sound, I'm quite picky, so thank you and just woah you are incredible at writing. and awhw I get the soft gooey feels of cuteness when I read your work.

You've also got me into F1 so thanks for that?

I left guest kudos but I forgot my ao3 password but I needed to get my feelings through somewhere so cheers

(guess what fandom I'm originally from there is a hint somewhere :))

seeing as i also got into f1 through fanfic this feels v full circle lmao <3 anyway!!! welcome!!!! i hope you enjoy your time here :) also thank you for loving my fics i appreciate it <3

[orange-waterfalls]

Can We Talk?

Bim Trimmer x m!reader

ty @just-bts-trash-00 for the request!

A/N: WHOOOOOOO BOY HOWDY, GUESS WHO'S BACK. It's been uh. A while. I'm sorry? School has been hectic and my mental health is SHIT, but i fucking finished it holy god. Anywaaaays, angst. Y'all remember Bim's crush on Matthias? Yeah that's the plot. It's pretty long and I think it's pretty shit but uh here I guess.

Word count: 2.9k

--

You hummed quietly as you fixed dinner for you and your boyfriend in the kitchen. Normally, you didn’t cook. Neither did Bim. Therefore, one of you had to be the cook in the relationship, and you supposed it had to be you. You couldn’t just get takeout until the end of time.

Well… maybe if you really wanted to.

But you didn’t. You wanted to cook for your boyfriend. He’d said something about “Jewish burgers” one day, and you didn’t know what that meant. At this point, you were too scared to ask. You’d found a recipe for shawarma, and he’d liked that shawarma place you went to the other day, so you were making shawarma. At least… you did your best.

You yawned and rubbed your eyes, quickly hissing because you somehow forgot there was a bunch of shit on your hands. You quickly turned the faucet on and put your eye under the stream to clean it out.

As you dried your face, you heard a car pull up to the driveway, along with three short honks. You smiled. Finally. You wiped your hands on a rag and turned around to greet your gameshow host.

“Honey, I’m home!” He said in a sing-songy voice as he looked around for you. He saw you leaning on the kitchen counter and smiled. He shrugged off his suit jacket and sat his bag down. He walked towards you with his arms open. You pushed yourself off of the counter and fell into him.

“Hi…” you whispered. He chuckled and held you tight.

“What’s up?” He sniffed the air. “And what’s cooking?”

“Shawarma…” you said, your voice muffled in his neck.

“And uh… what’s wrong?” You brought your head up and squinted at him. “Ah, of course. The process of making the shawarma. What else would it be?” You shoved your face back in his neck with a grunt of affirmation. He snorted and patted your back. He directed you towards the couch, where you plopped down on your back with a groan.

“Dinner…” you whined. He sat his phone on the coffee table and took his shoes off.

“I’ll finish it up.” He patted your stomach.

“Thank you…” He kissed your forehead and walked away, letting you have your rest. You felt kinda bad, he’d been working all day, and it must be tiring having to sound so happy all the time. Then again, YOU worked all day too, AND you tried to make dinner. Your small rest was earned.

You closed your eyes and sighed, relaxing into the sofa. You startled a bit at the notification sound coming from his phone.

“Bim, your phone… binged…” You called. Binged? Was that the word?

“I’ll be done in a minute.” He responded.

Dinged! That was it.

You glanced at the phone. It didn’t sound like his usual texting sound, and he didn’t have any games as far as you knew. Maybe it was an email.

Your curiosity got the better of you and you checked the lockscreen.

Yup! Email. From someone named… M? Who was that?

You shrugged and put it back down. None of your business.

Bim walked back into the living room holding two plates.

“Dinner is served!” He said in a bad English accent.

“Woo…” You cheered weakly and sat up. He put the plates on the table and went back towards the kitchen. “Oh, I bought wine earlier. The good shit, that Dark gets sometimes.”

“Damn, really? How much did that cost you?” He asked in disbelief.

“It was on sale.”

“Why would the good shit be on sale?”

“Some people just don’t have taste.” You smiled when you heard him laugh. He walked back in with two wine glasses and the bottle. “Oh, you have an email from someone named ‘M’.” He tensed up when he heard the name.

That’s… weird…

“O-Oh, uh… thanks…” He scrambled to grab his phone and shoved it in his pocket. You quirked an eyebrow at him. Suspicious…

“Uh… no problem…” He looked nervous as he poured wine for you two. You squinted at him a bit, wondering why he was so anxious. You trusted him, of course you did, but this was… weird.

You two sat and ate your dinner in silence. You kept trying to look at him but he avoided your eyes. When you finished your food, you poured more wine into your glass and downed it.

This was gonna be one of those days.

--

Yes, okay, you were drunk. Not blackout drunk, but drunk enough to not exactly know what was going on. You knew that Bim was a bit drunk as well and you two were laughing at… something… but other than that, you got nothing.

“I’m ju-I’m jus-I’m…” You paused and blinked a couple times to process your own words. “I’m just saying that Twilight coulda been sssssoooo much better… if the portag… protagonist… fuck’s her name again?”

“Bella?” Bim chuckled.

“That’s the bitch!” You slammed your hand down on the table. Bim wheezed. “If she’d just had… a little-a little more e-mo-tion, a little more person… personality… then Twilight coulda been better! But noooooo, she had ta be… the most person-boring person in cinematic history. Bull. shhhhhit.”

“Well, she’s… she needs to… young girls have to… relate to her!”

“Okay, but like… she’s a got-damn plank o’ wood.”

“Tha-hahahaha! That’s not fair!”

“She is! She never-she’s not-she-oh god, I’m drunk…” You squeezed your eyes shut and leaned forward, face angled at the floor in case you got nauseous.

“Yeah… me too…” He sighed.

“Hey, hey Bim?” You opened an eye and turned to him. He hummed in response. “Who’s ‘M’?” He tensed up again and you frowned.

“Uh, nobody. Nobody! D-Don’t worry about it!” He cleared his throat and shifted in his chair.

“Suspicious…” you mumbled.

“Huh?”

“Nothin’.”

You tilted your head at him, half trying to figure out who it could be(which was very difficult in your drunken state) and half trying to read his mind. You supposed he got kind of uncomfortable because he said:

“I’m gonna… go into my office… and check some things…” He stood up and shuffled into a small room that he’d claimed as his office. You sighed and sunk back into the couch, thinking about your options.

First step was communication. You tried to talk to him, but he was being evasive and didn’t honestly answer the question. Suspicious.

Second step was… looking around the house for clues as to who it was like you were Sherlock Holmes? Absolutely.

You brought yourself to your feet, only stumbling a little, and tiptoed to your shared bedroom. You closed the door behind you as softly as you could before walking over to the closet. You opened it and looked for a moment before deciding it wasn’t worth to actually move things around. You shut the door and moved to the drawers. If anything was gonna be anywhere, it would be in the sock drawer, right? You reached out and put your hand on the handle. You tugged a bit, cracking it open, just a little. Your brain kept telling you that you were already there, just get it over with.

But your heart(well… still your brain, but whatever) was telling you that you needed to trust your boyfriend if this relationship was going to work.

You sighed and shut the drawer, flopping face-first onto the bed.

Bim wasn’t the type to cheat. Well… you didn’t think so, anyways. You loved him and… well, you hoped he loved you. You were going to have faith in your boyfriend. No matter how curious you were.

You shifted around in the bed so you were laying in the correct direction. You were still on your stomach, and you closed your eyes, facing the wall opposite of the door.

After a few minutes, you heard the door quietly creak open. The lights turned off and you heard footsteps make their way towards the bed. You smiled a bit and turned your head to look at Bim. Your smile fell as you saw him open the sock drawer and pull a napkin out.

“Hi Bim.” you said. He screamed and shoved the napkin back in the drawer, slamming it shut. You blinked at him.

“H-Hi, darling, I-I didn’t know you were awake…” He stuttered.

“I was.” You raised your eyebrows.

“Well… I can see that…” He laughed nervously. You looked at his hand on the drawer.

“What were you looking at?” You asked.

Please tell me the truth, you begged in your head.

“Oh, uh… n-nothing important, haha…”

Dammit, Bim.

“Okay, well… come to bed?” You suggested. You smiled at him as best you could.

“Uh… I’m kinda busy…” He scratched his head. You frowned.

“Please?” You begged and held your arms out. He opened his mouth to oppose, but he decided to make eye contact for the first time tonight since dinner. He visibly relaxed and smiled at you, and you smiled back. He sighed and took his glasses off. You scooted over so he could climb in next to you. You wrapped your arms around him and snuggled into his chest.

“I love you…” you whispered. He didn’t say anything for a moment before he chuckled.

“I love you, too. Night, darling.”

“Good night.”

--

You woke up feeling cold. You reached out to your boyfriend, but he wasn’t there. You rolled over and looked at the time. 3:00 am. Jesus, what was Bim doing? You slowly stood up and got out of bed, still feeling very tired. You walked around for a bit, searching for your partner, before pausing.

Was he… talking to someone? At this hour?

You walked towards the bathroom, where Bim’s voice was coming from. You put an ear against the door, trying to listen.

“Why can’t he just leave me alone, why can’t he just let me live my life?!” He whisper-yelled. “I’m perfectly content with how I am now. He didn’t want me when I was available, and now I’m unavailable, and suddenly he loves me?! What kind of bullshit is that?!” You frowned, not knowing who he was talking to. You were worried because of how upset he sounded. You softly knocked on the door.

“Bim? You alright?” You asked quietly. You heard a small thump from inside and flinched.

“Y-Yeah! Just… Just give me a minute!” He yelled. You walked away from the door and looked into the office. You saw your jacket on the floor and scoffed. How’d that get there?

You walked to the other side of the room and grabbed it. As you were walking back, something caught your eye. Bim hadn’t turned the computer off. You figured you’d do it for him. As you went to click out of the open tab, you saw messages on the screen. From ‘M’.

M

Do you love me?

B

Sure

M

So, you’ll get me on your gameshow again?

B

I’ll try.

M

Oh. I see.

B

I’ll try my best. I’ll do anything for you.

M

Anything?

B

Yes

M

Leave your boyfriend

Hello?

Trimmer? You there?

Your vision started to blur and you were confused until you felt the tears start down your face. You were still drunk, right? That’s why you were so emotional.

Yep. That’s it. That’s the only reason.

You wiped your face and went back to the bathroom door. He was still talking, but more quietly so you didn’t really hear him. After a minute or two, he sighed and unlocked the bathroom door. You stepped away and leaned on the wall opposite the door. Bim walked out and yelped.

“Oh my God! Hi!” He laughed. “I-I didn’t know you were still out here, uh…” He looked at you and furrowed his eyebrows. “Your… eyes are kinda red… are you ok?” He reached out to touch your face but you avoided his hand.

“No, no. I’m fine. Just… need to use the… bathroom…” You said, managing to not have any voice cracks or slur any words. Nice.

“I… ok…” He dropped his hand and walked towards your bedroom. You went into the bathroom, shutting and locking it behind you. You hiccuped a bit before tears started streaming down your face. You leaned your forehead on the door, just letting it all out. You hadn’t cried in a while, that’s all.

That is the only reason.

You stood there and cried for a bit before walking over to the sink and looking at yourself in the mirror.

God, you were a mess.

Your eyes were all red and puffy, there were tear marks on your cheeks, you kept sniffling like a goddamn third grader.

And it… hurt.

Not just your eyes stinging from the tears. Although that hurt too.

The fact that he was hiding from you, that he wouldn’t talk to you, that he didn’t trust you.

You sighed and shut your eyes. You turned the faucet on, splashing water on your face, wiping all the evidence away.

You turned the water off and stared at your face, dripping wet, looking a bit shit.

“I’ll talk to him in the morning…” you promised yourself. You went back into your bedroom, finding Bim already asleep. You climbed in next to him, but didn’t hold him like you usually did. You curled up and turned away.

You’d talk to him in the morning.

--

You went to the living room after waking up and getting ready. You were supposed to go into work, but you told your boss you were having “family problems” and might come in later. You sat on the couch and watched a bit of tv while you waited for Bim to wake up. He had the day off, so he didn’t have to worry about anything. He was

You sat with your knees tucked in. You lifted your head a bit when you heard th shower turn on. You sighed and thought about what you were supposed to say.

Hi, Bim. I’m worried about you. Is there anything you want to tell me?

Hi, Bim. You’ve been acting weird recently. Everything ok?

Hi, Bim. I went through your messages. Are you cheating on me?

You groaned and buried your face in your hands. Why was this happening? Was he not happy? Were you doing something wrong?

As you were overthinking, the shower turned off. You uncovered your face and turned the TV off. You sat and waited for Bim to enter the living room.

Okay, just… tell him what happened.

Bim walked in wearing a T-Shirt and sweatpants. He went to the door and grabbed a jacket.

“We need more chicken, I’ll head to the store and-”

“Can we talk? Can you sit down for a second?” You interrupted. He froze halfway through putting his jacket on and stared at you.

“Um… okay…” He said slowly. He put the jacket on the back of his chair and sat. You sighed and put your legs down.

“Last night, when you were in the bathroom, I went into your office,” you explained. His eyes widened. Not a good sign.

“Why-Why did you do that?” His voice cracked as he spoke.

“I saw my jacket on the floor.” His face twitched into a scowl for a millisecond.

“Okay… and?”

“And… I figured I’d turn your computer off for you.” You avoided looking at him. “I s-saw some messages, and I wanted to ask-”

“I’m not cheating on you!” He claimed loudly. You blinked and looked at him. He looked scared. Kinda panicked.

“Okay…”

“I-I don’t like him anymore! That was like a joke message! I didn’t mean it, I just wanted to know if he actually felt anything for me, or if I was just being used by him! It was from a while ago! I-I know I shouldn’t have messaged him, I know a-and I’m sorry, but I don’t know why he’s messaging me again now! I want nothing to do with him I promise!” You hummed and looked away. You heard a shuffle before Bim appeared on his knees on the floor in front of you.

“Wha-Bim?” You flushed.

“Please, please, please believe me! I never wanted anyone but you! I just… It wasn’t recent, it was a while ago! I wanted to know if he ever actually liked me, and… I had you! There wasn't any reason to go back to him! And I don’t want to lose you! I-I can be better, I promise!”

“Okay, h-how ‘bout we calm down-”

“I do love you, I-I do! But… if you don’t trust me anymore, that’s fine! I-I just want you to be happy and-”

“BIM!” You yelled. He looked up at you with misty eyes and a quivering lip. You shook your head with a small laugh.

“Wh-What’s so funny?” He sniffled.

“I’m not gonna leave you! I understand! You wanted to know if there was anything ever there, if he ever felt anything for you instead of just being a manipulative bastard.” You smirked.

“Yes! Exactly!” He nodded his head hard.

“You could’ve… said that. I would’ve understood…”

“You… You would have?”

“Bim, you’re an adult. Do you not know how to communicate?”

“Uh… not… really?” He furrowed his eyebrows.

“Okay, we’re gonna have to work on that, and I think you might have trust issues too… ” You shook your head.

“Do I need therapy?”

“Yeah, therapy’s good for this sort of thing.”

You moved forward and kissed his forehead. He wiped his eyes and kissed you gently.

“Are we gonna be okay?” He asked after pulling back. You leaned your forehead against his.

“Yeah… we’ll be okay?”