#i'm sorry for any typos or clunky sentence i have only read it back once <3

[lost-in-fandoms]

just read ur maxiel wing tumblr fic… obsessed… daniel being so sweet and gentle omg

aaah thank you so much! I love this little universe that lives in my head so much :( sadly my brain refuses to commit lately so I have just been writing ficlets of whatever idea sticks around for more than 5 minutes instead of full fics akjnskjnsa but I am glad you enjoyed it!

I have some more for you under the cut <3 (part 1)

cw for mental and physical health issues related to 2022 Daniel, hurt/comfort

Max doesn't really remember when's the last time he had a full conversation with Daniel.

No, that's a lie, he remembers, he just doesn't like to think about it. It was at the start of the season, during media day: they had talked about their break and Daniel had said how he had high hopes for this year.

It's not that they haven't talked since, it's just been...different, like they don't know each other anymore. And maybe they don't, Max supposes, watching Daniel stare in the distance, headphones firmly in place, a ghost of his usual smile stretching his too thin cheeks.

So many things have changed, and he hates it, but the reality is that he doesn't really know how to act around this Daniel anymore.

The race is good, standing on the top step never gets old, but afterwards he can't stop thinking about Daniel, finishing once again out of the points, once again behind Lando. Can't stop thinking about the dullness of his usually shiny wings, hanging limply behind him.

He texts Lando. He knows Daniel might just turn him away, but Max is not going to stand around any longer. He's not forgotten everything Daniel did for him, when he was just an awkward teenager learning how to be himself.

He needs to knock twice on Daniel's door before he finally hears some noises from inside, but he waits patiently, doesn't really have anywhere else to do, having already turned down the offer to go out for drinks with the team.

"Michael, I already told you I..." Daniel opens the door while already speaking, but he interrupts himself when he realizes it's Max who is standing there.

"Hello, Daniel" Max says, trying to keep his voice level. Daniel looks...rough. He looks worse than he did earlier, pale and drawn, hair a frizzy mess on his head, clothes hanging awkwardly from his thin frame. Even from just the glimpse he can get through the barely open door Max can see how ruffled his wings are.

"Max?" Daniel blinks, as if Max is going to disappear if he does it enough. Max doesn't know if that's surprise or wishful thinking.

"Can I come in?" he asks, taking a step forward so hopefully Daniel won't shut the door in his face.

"I..." Daniel is still blinking, confusion and exhaustion clear on his face. "Listen, mate, I don't know why you're here, but I am tired, can it wait?"

"Have you eaten?"

Daniel stiffens at the question, but Max doesn't take it back, looking straight at him until Daniel relents.

"I have. Why are you here, Max?" Daniel is still not moving away from the door, leaning slightly against it, shoulders drawn up tight in a way that looks almost painful. It probably is.

"I am here to eat cake with you and help you with your wings" Max says, raising his hand with the small bag carrying two slices of cake he asked at the front desk of his own hotel. "We don't have to talk."

For a moment, they just look at each other. Max used to be able to read Daniel once, but now he can just wait.

"I can't have cake," Daniel scrubs a hand down his face, the three on his finger looking duller than usual. "And I don't need help with my wings."

Max rolls his eyes, finally having had enough, gently pushing Daniel aside to step into the room. He doesn't like how bony Daniel's shoulder feel, or how easily he relents, but he'll take the success of being able to get in instead of having to stand in the hallway.

"You will eat cake, because I said so, and I will clean your wings, because you're not doing it correctly," he states. The room they have Daniel in doesn't have a couch, this would have been better in Max's own room, but it does have a low armchair that will have to do. He places the bag on the small desk, taking out the plastic forks and the cake container, before handing it to Daniel.

Daniel, who is still standing next to the door, looking lost and confused, doesn't take it. Max puts them down on the desk again.

"I can't eat it, Max," he says, and this time he sounds more pained, as if he's not really only talking about the cake anymore and Max has to choke down the distressed warble that is making its way up his throat, knowing it would only upset Daniel further.

Okay, change of plan then.

He takes a step forward, slowly raising his hands to tug Daniel into a hug. This time, Daniel goes easily, slumping against him, shivering a little. It's been so long since they hugged properly, but Max knows it's not supposed to feel like this. Daniel used to grip the back of his neck, tug him closer, but now he's just standing there, arms not even coming up to wrap around him.

He doesn't let go until it's Daniel the one to take a step back, and even then he keeps a hand on him, firmly guiding him towards the armchair, grabbing a pillow and putting it on the floor.

"Sit," he says gently. Daniel sits, seemingly too tired to argue any longer.

"I am going to preen your wings, and you are going to relax, and if you still do not want to eat cake after, then we won't. Okay?"

Daniel nods, not even looking at him. He looks small, sitting on the floor, wings heavy on his back, hands limp in his lap. Max wishes he knew how to fix it, wishes he could wrap his wings around him and shield him from everything else, wishes he could keep him safe from himself, but he can at least do something to take care of him.

He brought his own cloths to clean Daniel's wings and he's glad of that now, not wanting to waste time looking for them in Daniel's bags, not when he doesn't know how long Daniel will let him stay for.

The state of Daniel's wings is worse than what he had thought. There are feathers out of place everywhere, grit and dust stuck to them, and his muscles are all tense and full of knots. But the worst parts are the small patches of reddened skin, where feathers have been plucked out, leaving bald spots dotted with congealed blood behind. The inside of his left wing is particularly a mess, and despite Max trying his best to not make it worse, Daniel still whimpers from where he's leaning against Max's leg.

"I'm sorry," Max whispers, over and over, until he's not even sure what he's apologizing for, the pain and discomfort or everything else, until the words turn into soft coos and warbles.

It takes time. He does end up having to ask Daniel about his own cloths, because the two he brought are too dusty to be useful anymore, but by the end of it Daniel is breathing slow and deep, finally fully relaxed against him, looking more at peace than Max has seen him in a long time.

Max doesn't ask about the cake again, knows this is a battle for another day, just helps Daniel up and into bed.

"Thank you," Daniel whispers, barely making any sound. There are dried tear tracks on his cheeks, but neither of them mention it.

"Always, Daniel."

Max leaves when Daniel falls asleep, leaving the cake in the mini fridge, even if he knows it will probably stay there.

The next day, when Daniel goes to check out, the woman at the desk hands him a package that had arrived for him in the morning. He's confused, he doesn't remember ordering anything, until he opens it and find a tube of a soothing cream for his irritated skin.

[not-poignant]

Can I ask for 8 (again - though I also really love the section you chose!), 15, 21, 27, and 40(again)? Sorry if it's too many, you can just pick a couple instead of you need to! (I'm just endlessly curious!)

I’m skipping the dialogue one (Q8) (though I have answered it) not because I don’t want to but because this post just got really really really long and I’m already embarrassed. e.e

Have answered 15 here!

21. How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

It really depends on what it is.

Random fic oneshot? Probably not that many times. Once?

Something in the Fae Tales verse? That usually goes through more rigorous editing. Sometimes around 2-5 pass-throughs from me, depending on how smooth I think the chapter was. (I have been told by a head editor of a publishing company that I write very ‘clean’). But I have a habit of writing clunky or clumsy sentences, and sometimes editing pass-throughs are less about typos and more about sort of smoothing out the reading experience so it’s more pleasurable and less ‘well that was a weird fucking sentence.’

Fanfiction really depends on my mood. Sometimes I’m super thorough, and sometimes I don’t care that the word ‘enough’ has been used three times in the same paragraph. I also don’t care about passive tense as much as some people, because I really like passive tense. I’ll still always edit though. I’ve never written something and put it up straight away.

Original novels get edited per chapter, and then get about three really thorough edits from me at the end. That will be a grammar/typo/sentence structure edit, a continuity/substantive edit (including adding/subtracting scenes) and the a final formatting/copy edit.

Just about everything I write goes to a beta, and original novels/short stories go to a couple of betas and then an editor. After the final editor pass-over, I make those changes, send it back to the editor, and after that I proof-read, which is my least favourite part and I have been lazy enough on this before that a typo I missed and the editor missed made it through to print, so…eep.

Read mores hide my shame at how long this response is (and you don’t have to see how much I hate AO3 story collaborations as a rule):

27. How do you feel about collaborations? 

In terms of more than one person working on the same story: I don’t like them. I’m a very control-hungry author and I enjoy worldbuilding and character building from the ground up, and even the fic authors I love the most I’ve never ever thought ‘I should do some kind of collaboration with them.’ I don’t want to pollute their style with my own, I love what they do because of what they do, so collaborations really aren’t my thing. I don’t write to ‘socialise’ or to have a really close bond with someone, which isn’t to say that I don’t make friends through writing, or that I don’t have writer friends, but specifically, I don’t want to write in a social way. I’m too introverted, too reclusive, and honestly, too controlling over the stories I want to write. I suspect I’d be an asshole to collaborate with.

It’s no coincidence that I was always that person at university who ended up doing everyone’s work in the ‘group work’ assignments, and eventually preferred it that way.

I do roleplay with a friend though. I’m not open for roleplaying with anyone else, but we’ve easily gotten down over a million words over the past few years. I have tentatively thought about adapting that into an original story, or stories? So that would then count as collaboration? But that’s a lot of work, and honestly I just enjoy that as something that only the two of us currently get to look at.

I’m also really wary of reading AO3 collaborations with two or more authors. Generally speaking, it usually means the story has been roleplayed beforehand, and you either get two perspectives in the same chapter with no breaks between those (which I personally hate, it’s cool if that’s your thing), clumsy transitions between voice, a lack of consistency in style of prose, or get clunky transitions on theme. There’s always exceptions to the rule and I’ve bookmarked a few collaborations, but about 8 out of 10 ‘multi author’ stories I read on AO3 really show (at least on my end, as a reader) the cons of writing with a partner or friends, than they show the pros. :/ I imagine the pros for the author/s though, is that they actually got a story written that might not have been written otherwise.

Even Glen and I have talked about collaborating, and we eventually decided against it, and we live together, and share everything together, lol. And he’s a writer! A very very good one!!

Exceptions to this are: I have and will collaborate in a writer’s room for scriptwriting. Idk why, it just feels different. And I would absolutely collaborate with an artist on a graphic novel. In fact I would love to do that. Also I have illustrated tarot cards for other writers in the past. And have done art collaborations such as the Red Circle series where I painted the sculptures, and Le Animale made the sculptures, and then I did accompanying art and totem meanings. So I guess I’m just also quite fussy about writing quality, and I know how collaborations often fuck the shit out of that in a bad way.

(I have participated in a fic round robin once though but hush let’s never talk about that, it wasn’t a terrible experience I just didn’t really enjoy it either).

40. Write an alternative ending to [insert fic title] (or just the summary of one).

Okay.

Okay like imagine like, imagine Snowball Earth.

Like we’re in the next ice age.

And imagine all the humans are gone right? They’re just…gone. Maybe there’s like a few pockets left here and there, but otherwise gone.

And now imagine Pitch and Jack and the rest of the Guardians standing on this icy white plain looking out into this vista of endless cold and then Bunnymund just exclaims:

‘Fucking great, Jack, now you’ve gone and done it, haven’t you?’

And then he pops into a tiny little bunny, because there aren’t really many people left to worship any of them anymore.

And Pitch places his hand around Jack’s shoulders and says quietly, with a smile:

‘I’m so proud of you.’

*

From this meme.