#i'm proud of myself for kinda just winging it and figuring all of this out

[fascinationstreetmp3]

messing around with modifying her is pretty fun. i’m actively breaking some npcs probably because i don’t know how to make new material entries but they’re a sacrifice i’m willing to make

[samsspambox]

hi hi!! i was tagged by both @actualbird and @theres-a-bea for the 15 questions thing!!! thank you both!! <3 (i decided to make a separate post to not ping everyone lolol)

anyways! here we go!! :D

are you named after anyone? no but i almost was tho! my dad wanted to name me after my paternal grandmother/paternal aunt but my mom swooped in last second and put my name as is hehe!

when was the last time you cried? a day ago lmaooo. there's health issues in my family currently going on and, well, i worry a lot.

do you have kids? in the words of artem wing: i've never had a girlfriend or wife, let alone a child. (this user has never had a romantic partner ever. i've asked around and apparently, i just fit nicely in with friends that i'm never considered for romance so, yeah.)

do you use sarcasm much? yes absolutely, its my third language. not much online tho but irl? yes

what sports do you play? i used to play soccer and do track and field back in middle school but i tore something (American health care everyone) and it kinda hurts when doing extreme stuff so i just stick to walking lolol. i would've loved to do gymnastics.

first thing you notice about other people? their eyes and vibes! you can tell a lot from a person just from their eyes and tbh, and my gut feelings don't do me wrong. there was this one time when a person felt off vibe- wise and i was right it was so validating

eye color? brown!

scary movies or happy endings? happy endings!! i absolutely hate horror (not to dis it at all, its just not for me). my friend has sworn off taking me to see a horror movie bc -- ha-- i was a horror to watch it with

any special talents? uh,,, i'm pretty good with a map? pattern recognition? knowing the 50 states in song form? the ability to bullshit my way out of situations? idk if these count lolol i find myself going blank!

where were you born? i was born in the west coast of America! unlock level 420 of friendship to figure out the state!

what are your hobbies? i read, write, i'm teaching myself to draw, i fiddle with computers a lot (i, uh, program stuff in my free time just to fuck around but my favorite thing to do is break into computers? with consent ofc), i know my way about circuit boards and soldering, and off the record i translate, tutor, and take care of kids jksbdkjsb. the woes of the oldest child

do you have any pets? yES! my babies gabacho and ginger i love them to bits and they were born on leap day

13. how tall are you? i'm 5 feet 2.5 inches (lISTEN I GREW HALF AN INCH SINCE MIDDLE SCHOOL IM PROUD) 14. favorite subject in high school? i was really into my digital electronics class, CSA, world history, and physics! 15. dream job? back when i was younger the dream job was NASA, but now idk? i'm having an ongoing crisis but the way things are going I'll end up doing something in cybersecurity

and now for the tags! i shall tag @surely-galena and whoever else wants to join in!

[thebookworm0001]

I'm terribly nosy, so-- 3,5,11, 19 for the ask game? Or whichever you prefer! ❤️

Gonna answer 3&5 for another ask in a second, so hold on tight!

11. Do you believe in the old advice to "kill your darlings?" Are you a ruthless darling assassin?

What happens to the darlings you murder? Do you have a darling graveyard? Do you grieve?

The way that my professors explained this one to me is that sometimes you have lines/sections/etc that you may love, but just don’t work for your piece. So you ditch them. However, you don’t get rid of them. You throw them into a special dead darlings document/folder/notebook and hold onto them. They may live there forever, or you may find that they work perfectly somewhere else.

So, I say less ‘kill your darlings’ and more ‘put them in retirement and they can come out of it if they feel like working again’

I actually combined a lot of my fic wips into one single wip doc, so now I can pull out my darlings and they just hang around. Usually any sadness I feel is replaced once I figure out what actually is working. Then I can try to find a new home for whatever I had to ditch. I’m much more attached to getting the thing right than I am making sure that a single line or phrase sticks around.

19. Tell me a story about your writing journey.

When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who loved to read. Stories were everything to her. Why be in the real world when the pages between covers could offer so much more? One day, the brilliant idea came to her - what if she made her own adventures? She quite liked this one World, where children had been given wings and sought to find a place to live in peace far away from the terrible people who had done so. So why not tell a new story there? So she did! And my goodness, she didn’t stop. She filled up notebook after notebook of stories - using the sandbox other people had made to play with new stories and ideas. Many of them very dark, most of them always working toward a happy end. She even shared some of them with people. Some she knew and some she would never meet. And at some point, she started trying out her own worlds and own people. None of them very original, but what can you expect when you’re first starting out. And she liked that so much she decided to keep doing it, and to pay quite a bit of money to learn how to do it better.

And at this point I’m dropping the fairy tale thing. Tired.

Anyway, went to college for creative writing. Figured out not only do I kinda love poetry, I’m actually quite good at it. Got some of mine published internationally, even. Turns out writing short stories makes my brain hurt but I want to do it more than I want to write the poems. College included some Trauma, some of which I wrote about, some of which I can’t write about still (hello burn injuries) and then I wrote a book. 61k words in one year for a single project - a first for me. And a fucking fantastic way to burn myself out. Like, I do think I actually hurt myself doing that. (Perfectionism and anxiety combined to form procrastination and I’m a slow writer as-is.) Very proud of the project. Still have not read it all the way through (that’s a summer project, actually) because reading my own work is some of the most terrifying shit I have to do and I actively avoid it.

Got a job doing writing and editing things professionally. Then a pandemic happened. And somehow that allowed me to write and publish my first ever bit of erotica. Which continues to be my most popular piece of writing.

I don’t write nearly as much as I used to these days - a combo of that burnout and just not having the time/energy anymore (also that perfectionism that I have been getting slowly better about) - and I’m trying to be kind to myself about it. Writing feels a lot like pulling teeth for me - but the end product makes it worth it. And I don’t think I could ever stop writing. I love stories too much. But I’m at a place where if I want to be able to keep doing it, I can’t push myself the way I once did. And while that is frustrating, it does mean that when i can get my writer brain to turn on, it’s a lot easier to get stuff down. If only because I’ve spent four months working out the details of a scene in my head before writing out a single word.

[wutheringmights]

I've just found Call Them Brothers and I am so in love with the way you write Warriors, Time, and Wind. The characterizations are all fascinating and they all feel like real, breathing people and it's super impressive. They're definitely my favorite characterizations I've found in any lu fic and I just wanted to say thank you for giving such complex characters such a fascinating and cathartic story.

Also, the way you have crafted the plot together and connected so many different narrative threads into what I can only describe as a gorgeous tapestry is absolutely masterful. You are truly composing one of the greatest and most well put together stories I've ever read. As a writer myself, I feel like I'm learning so much about how to use stylistic choices to better support plot threads. I absolutely adore CTB so thank you very much.

If it's alright, can I ask how you manage all the various plot threads and especially all the political intrigue?

I hope you have a lovely day/evening and thank you so much for Call Them Brothers

Thank you so much! You're really kind and I'm so happy you like CTB so far!! This story has been a big experiment of just throwing stylistic spaghetti at the wall and seeing what happens, so I'm glad you're enjoying it.

I am a proud preacher of the importance of character drama in a story. Any genre or idea or world is carried by the writing for the characters. I have spent a long time honing in on how to write character dramas.

I say that because all of the various plot threads, even the political intrigue ones, are at their core about two or more characters at odds with each other.

Every plot line about the war can be broken down into what Warriors's relationships are with other people, like Spirit, Lincoln, Zelda, Impa, Anders, and more. Typically, each character is a mouthpiece for a specific stance that Warriors opposes. Let them clash, and what is essentially a story about a bunch of people trying to figure out how to fight a war becomes 10 times more intriguing.

I know I wrote a very long post some time about about how I came up with some of the world building stuff concerning the politics, but I can't find it. Here is a quick summary of what I probably said:

Don't be afraid to just use real world politics in your story; my Hyrule is brimming with a lot of the classic Americanisms

Focus on cause and effect; if character X does something, then it should have a ripple effect

Look at other stories about the topic you're writing on; I was pretty familiar with literature and movies about war before writing this story, which certainly helped me in writing about a war

Get everyone's perspectives; I find that a lot of political intrigue focuses on the upper classes, which is why I think the story becomes richer when you look at how all these policies affect the people

For the copious amounts of plot threads... I'm not even sure, pal. All I know is that I established that certain characters are going through stuff and as I write the story, they kind of just do things on their own.

I can talk more about how the present day and the past are worked together:

For purposes of character development and plotting, I considered the past and the present two different stories; thinking them as the same one makes it more complicated than it needs be

I picked a point in both plots where the events had to happen in the same chapter, then paced CTB around it

The past is more thoroughly planned out in the present so that I could reference one in the other without worrying about inconsistencies

Everyone already knows how the past ends, as it ends in the present. That means the two sides of the story will have different types of tension: one where the reader sees the train wreck but can't stop it and one where the reader doesn't know when the crash is happening; understanding they have different types of tension and intrigue and leaning into it will help the plots match up

Everything beyond that I just kinda wing it. Truthfully, I can tell where in the story I shoe'd in a convenient plot point to help move things along. I don't think many people notice where the plot is weak since I try to make everything come off as being on purpose.

So that's my last bit of advice: be confident, especially if this is a genre you're not used to or a project that you think you're not prepared for. Readers can tell when you're scared. I swear that if you just commit and show no fear, your story will appear more put together than it is.

[waspsinyouryard]

I’m curious how everyone’s year was so please tell me what you favourite ----- from this year was! Answer as many or as few as you want! (Feel free to send this to other people and change it if you want)

Favourite Movie/Show you watched: 

Favourite Album you listened to:

Favourite thing you learned: 

Favourite book/comic: 

Favourite project you completed: 

Best impulse purchase?

Funniest joke you heard?

Strangest building you went in?

New food you discovered?

Most memorable conversation?

Prettiest sunset?

Favourite new outfit?

What are you proud of this year?

Favourite Memory from this year: 

Anything you would change? 

Anything you’re looking forwards to in the new year?

~Gumi

I'm going to try and answer all of these but I can already tell that some of these are going to be difficult:

1. Favorite movie/show

I don't really watch movies out of my own volition and I'm like the one Tumblr user who doesn't watch TV shows (and my memory is bad, so I could also be forgetting something) so my options are very limited:

The FNAF movie (which was laughably terrible)

Stranger than Fiction (a 2006 movie that was just. not good. I didn't like it.)

Rio 2 (a kid sitting next to me for a substantial amount of time was watching it and I could hear the audio)

Out of those options I'd probably have to say the FNAF movie was my favorite because it was bad in a funny way and also recency bias.

2. Favorite Album

My music consumption is almost exclusively video game soundtracks and I haven't really found any games to love the soundtrack of recently anyways so

3. Favorite thing I've learned

I can't think of any one piece of knowledge that stands out as my favorite. I'm just happy to know things tbh

4. Favorite Book/Comic

I read quite a few books (mostly the Warriors series, near the beginning of the year) but my favorite probably still has to be Love and Limerence by Dorothy Tennov. I reread it this year so it counts.

5. Favorite project I completed

Probably this ridiculous 14k word Wings of Fire fanfiction where the world ends tbh. It's kinda very rough, but I had a blast making it.

6. Best impulse purchase

A greenish-blue Hawaiian shirt

7. Funniest joke

Unironically this

Leave the poor woman alone :(

8. Strangest building

Probably the church I took those photos in tbh. I get that it's not that strange overall but it was for me

9. Best new food

I can't think of any new food, but I did discover that French fries and (to an admittedly lesser degree) saltine crackers make surprisingly good additions to toppings and/or fillings.

10. Most memorable conversation

This one's memorable in a bad way.

Essentially, it was a conversation between myself and a friend about a Minecraft server we were on where said friend told me that I managed to piss off every single other member of the server. Of course I was a bit distraught about this, and I decided that I just wouldn't play on it anymore. Before that I was basically the most active member by far.

The reason I remember it so well is because I'm still so baffled about why what I did (kill the Ender Dragon on the first day of a new world (after rules regarding doing so were specifically abolished) and kill the Wither like a week later) enraged these people so much that they called for my friend to ban me (he didn't, btw).

11. Prettiest sunset

All of them. Unless I'm trying to go west and the sun is shining in my eyes.

12. Favorite new outfit

The Hawaiian shirt I mentioned previously.

13. Things I'm proud of

Here's a list, not in any sort of order:

Writing that fanfic I mentioned earlier

Figuring out Tumblr API stuff so I could improve @postsofbabel. And I guess it in general.

My progress on a new fanfic set in the Warriors world, where being sold to 1D is a major plot point.

Surviving, tbh

14. Favorite memory

uh

15. Anything I would change

I would change a lot about 2023, but I simply do not think I would have the ability enact a lot of these changes if I could go back through this year again.

16. Anything I'm looking forward to

World of Goo 2. Probably more that I can't think of at the moment but World of Goo is excellent

[firequeenofficial]

Hotguy Meet Cute by Doody and Maruu! I love Doody's art style so much, and Maruu is such a talented writer so this is gonna be great!

(This is another one I read ahead of time cause I couldn't control myself - don't worry though, I believe this is the last of those!)

We start of with HG sitting, bored and sullen on the edge of a building. How did he get there? Who knows. Why is he there? I doubt even he can answer that one. What's happening in his head? Very little, most likely. CG flies past and HG immediately goes, "Another villain?" as though he's been spending his time fighting instead of making up scenarios in his head like a teenage girl.

He has light up shoes. This is very important to me. Either that, or the floor is wet, but I'm choosing to believe that, when selecting his outfit, he saw the light up shoes and decided to make it part of his branding. Of course, he shoot CG, because it's Scar. He does this the only way he knows how to.

CG's reaction to being shot is, "Ack! Paf!" The paf is when he lands, an arrow sticking out of his wing. HG is insanely proud of himself and runs over the confront the "treacherous villain", but finds instead a guy dressed in pink, wearing a pink poncho (He Is Wearing A Pink Fur-Lined Poncho, And I Am Being So Normal About It) and hunched over.

CG yanks the arrow from his wing with the classic scathing look for HG, who is staring with the most 0.0 face hiding the heart eyes. "I should've figured it was you," says CG, his voice bubble dripping with contempt. At least, I assume that's what it's dripping. It's dripping something, and it's cool.

HG does Not enjoy CG pulling the arrow out, and shows more pain than CG does - little wimp (with love) (not much though, because ya know... last chapter). CG then proceeds to point the arrow directly at HG's throat, saying "From one vigilante to another-" and it's giving very similar vibes to "You're too full of yourself, pretty boy." Also, CG's poncho makes his face wings bend forward so they're framing his face a bit more and it's really, really cute.

The next page, I have commented on before (shhhh), when CG finishes with, "That was kinda rude 😐" while CG is surrounded by about thirty question marks. CG them immediately switches up to say, "😃Anyway byeeeee!!!" (that is the exact amount of e's and !'s that the comic has, I am not exaggerating). "WAIT! WHAT- WHO ARE YOU?!!" screams HG as CG flies away, calling, "byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" (again, exact amount of e's). HG is left with the arrow that shot CG, three question marks, a mouth as wide as his visor, and the words "what just happened?"

Just a short contribution from Doody and Maruu, but amazing as always. Huge fans of their work! Especially the expressions. Every single face in this comic could be a meme in and of itself, no joke. Iconic.

Is now a good time to cry about the merch shop? Or, more specifically, my tragically empty coffers? I'm weighing up how much I can buy and still recover financially from it.

I think I could get the stickers quite easily - and I am definitely considering it very strongly - but I so desperately want the Rancher's charm, and if I had my way, I would buy two of the comic: One to love and cherish forever, one to cut out all the Tango's to stick him on my wall. Unfortunately, I barely have the £35 it would take to buy it ONCE, let alone twice. I am also eyeing up that Motherspore poster like nobody's business. We'll see, I guess.

Okay, I promised I'd do a liveblog of when I read the Hotguy Comics Zine, so here it is! Spoilers to follow, proceed with caution!

Okay, right off the bat, the first page is beautiful! The lighting is so insane, and the contrasting blues/purples and oranges are worked together so well. Also, HG looks so squeeshable, I wanna squoosh his face like a grandmother.

[underthe-redhood]

Are there any particular songs/quotes/scenes/stories that remind you of Our Last Chance or that you thought of when writing it? Similarly, are there any characters you think of when writing for the batsis? Personally I think of Tulip from Infinity Train (if you don't know she's a child of divorce who runs away from home BC she can't handle the changes and blames herself for them)

Particularly the quote/scene; "I know what it's like to think i-if you had just been better things would have been different. That you're responsible for fixing things that are beyond your control! Just know I speak from experience when I say this is not your fault. And I still wanna help you - if you'll let me."

And an episode where (in relation to the time travel of the story) Tulip revisits her memories in order to learn a lesson and is stuck commentating on what she wishes she had said but left unheard

"are you... Okay?"

Past tulip: yeah. Why wouldn't I be?

Present tulip: you're not.

Another character is Princess Bubblegum from Adventure time - less her tendency to need control and more about how she puts a lot on her shoulders and ends up pushing others away in her efforts. Plus the contingency plans

"I have to be "always so prepared". We can't all just wing it!I didn't have to always worry about so many things, you know? The Candy Kingdom used to be so small, so manageable. But then it kept growing and growing, and there was always some new disaster to prepare against."

"I tried. I really, really tried. I just... I thought that if I shut everything out and just focused on work, it would all be okay, but look where that landed me. All I managed to do was push everyone away. I pushed you away. I'm sorry, Marceline. I've been a real dinger to you."

And last that I can think of is Amethyst from Steven Universe but specifically the one episode where she has to face where she came from (that everyone else seems so eager to avoid bc it's bad history for them but it hurts her feelings that she can't be proud of where she's from)

"Admit it! I'm just an embarrassment to you... I'm not going to stand there and let you remind me of everything I hate about myself! I didn't ask for it to be this way... I never asked to be made!"

"this is like- my whole life! You wanna pretend that none of this ever happened. You think I'm just a big mistake!" "No, you're not the mistake - You're just the byproduct of a... Big mistake... That's not what I meant. I just never saw this as you, you didn't build this place. I- I'm sorry, I hope you can forgive me. You're the one good thing that came out of this mess. I always thought you were proud of that."

But I may have gone too heavy handed on the angst lol. These are just a few I thought of in relation to the story and I don't know the character as well as you do so what are your thoughts?

- 🐌

first off, sorry i’m replying kinda slow it’s finals week for me lol

your quotes are so perfect omg, i haven’t seen Infinity Train but that quote is so relatable to what batsis is feeling!!

as for the princess bubblegum one, i really like the quote and i actually was partially inspired by marceline’s storyline with the ice king because it was just another disaster where a kid lost a protective figure that really mattered to them!

the last two quotes are also really good! the struggle they mention isn’t necessarily about the plot but it definitely is how i imagine batsis to be and how i’d continue to write her if i ever use this same batsis in another future story!

honestly, the main way i came up with this plot was like a year ago i was reading about all the awful things batman has done to the robins (specifically dick) and i found the alternative universe comic where he slept with barbara and actually looked into the plot of ‘the killing joke’ and i saw this one scene of batman beyond (i think??) where barbara vaguely mentioned that dick left and was never seen again and i was so heartbroken for him and was thinking “if only someone had changed the past like wally or something” and then BAM inspiration hit!

[bookwyrminspiration]

everblaze, foxfire, linh?

Ed! Hello! I hope you are doing well!

everblaze: Your proudest achievement

oof that is a difficult one. I've done a lot of things that could probably categorized as a really cool achievement but I just expect exellency of myself so I downplay it. So I'll just list a few things I've done instead, maybe figure something else out along the way!

I finished all high school credits of math before I entered 10th grade (meaning I was done with all four years before the second year started), I'm ranked #1 in my class if we're going off weighted GPA, I got and am on track to get multiple associates degrees (2 year degrees) before graduating high school, and I tested into the gifted program in 1st grade (a year before testing usually starts) and was in the 99th percentile in all categories. Those are all school achievements hmm. Oh! the wings au!! I am very proud of that story and how far it's come, so that's definitely up there.

I don't really celebrate achievements (you know that thing where you set your expectations so unrealistically high that you loose sense of what is actually something to be proud of?) so I don't know what I'm proud of, but I think these are things that are generally pretty cool!!

foxfire: Your favorite school subject

I think it comes as no surprise that I was and am an avid English enjoyer. English classes just made sense, you know? Stories and writing and characters feel natural, and the way English classes encourage you to think critically is super fun for me. It does help that it's a subject I'm good at and that I've been actively exposed to literature my entire life. And that that exposure gave me a good understanding of grammar and how to write, so essays are pretty easy. But because I perform well in the classes and liked the subject, my English teachers have always liked me. My favorite class this year was my english class last fall, and I'm thrilled that I'll get to have that teacher again next year (though not for English). And I'll get to have this other teacher for English a second time next year!!! I love the teachers and the subject, so it's very high on my list

Though I will say that history was always fun as well, though I don't know why. Maybe because it was an easier class, as it's as the general education level compared to the all the other harder classes I was taking. I think history classes are more relaxed I guess, and that was nice. Another good one is foreign languages though, and those aren't always easy. Something about communication is fascinating. That's more than one though so I'll stop there.

Linh Song: The element you vibe with

If we're going with the traditional four elements, I think fire? I'm just thinking about this in terms of avatar so unsure how accurate that is. Something about the steady, reckless abandon of fire and how consuming it is. It's both comforting and provides warmth and brings people together (like campfires and hearths), and destructive and uncontrollable and furious. The determination associated with it alongside the risk of going to far and getting consumed matches my experiences with how I push myself and am reckless with myself, but how much I'm capable of when I do so. It's a delicate and sometimes unwise balance, but it's hard to let go of.

If we're going with kotlc elements, perhaps shadowflux. How it's unknown and rough and difficult to control, how it changes things. The way it's neither good nor bad kinda reminds me of my tendency to approach things motivated almost entirely by logic, trying to figure out how they work without acknowledging the good or bad of it. The potential for impartiality. I do also just like darkness though, and find comfort in it which makes it more appealing.

unsurprisingly, my responses are very long...oops?

[bausbitch]

Different music tastes

Reid x kpop Stan! reader

Crack and fluff ig idk lmfao

Lmfao I'm writing this on my phone and it's one am but fuck it 🤪🤩

In which Spencer's s/o //read: you// likes kpop 🤪

!!! Gif not mine I also don't know where I got it just check Pinterest!!!

You were,,, in fact,,, a kpop stan

And so were most of you friends

But your bf, none other than doctor spencer reid,,,, was not

He didn't know when he started dating you

In fact

He didn't know until you moved in 2 yrs later

So it was a big surprise for him

When you came in to your newly bought shared apartment with a box

"Hey honey I got the last of my stuff I'll unpack it later I'mma take a shower" - you, right before disaster

Ok so before the shitshow lemme explain how y'all met

You were, in your humble opinion, Garcia's best sibling

And you were kinda funky too

Y'all shared the same energy yknow???

And so one day

You went to bring her food

And the bau was in the middle of staying overnight for a case

So you were like

I'll be the best sibling™

And bring everyone food

So when you walked in there at like

What

3 am???

Chewing gum by none other than my boys nct dream in your headphones and a nakamoto mf yuta photo card in the back of your phone

Can you tell they're my ult group???

You looked like a h*cking angel with bags of take out as wings

They greeted you v v nicely

The young doctor

Who you so happened to be the same age as

Paid a lil bit extra attention to you

And blushed a lot

But he

Omg poor boy

Noticed

FREAKING

Christopher bang from stray kids

As your wallpaper

And he thought he was your bf

Ugh I wish

And he asked he was like

"Your boyfriend seems nice"

He asked bc like

You are so fine and he can't not talk to you

And Penelope was like

"Pfft! She wishes!" P, before you kicked her leg under the table

Spencer was like

Huh???

Wym wishes???

But he wrote it off and kept talking to you

And then you fell in love

Once in a while you'd call him crying at 3 am

Probably because of a comeback you weren't prepared for

Or because you missed him

Probably the first one

Ok an e WAYS

Remember the box???

Yeah

That was your merch

Ok maybe it wasn't just one box

But you had like

Put that in other boxes

So you could be discreet

Shhh

Don't be suspicious

But that box in particular

Had like

Your photo card album

And like

A few of your most precious albums

And maybe like the mamamoo lightstick??

Ok ok ok I'm getting ahead of myself

While you were singing to something Spence couldn't hear because of ✨shower noises✨

Probably like fancy by twice or something

He was like

"Oh hey let me surprise them by helping them unpack this mysterious box" - doctor genius

When he opened the box omg

There was an album that looked pretty normal

And he was like

Aww my baby's memories :(!!

So he opened it

And bam

Chaeyoung from twice

Xiaojun from wayv/nct

Yeji from itzy

Taeyong from nct

And a bunch of other hot Asian people

Staring back at him

And while he may be a genius

Ya boy didn't know much about Korean pop

So he

Omg

He thought you knEW ALL THESE HOT PEOPLE

And he was

Astonished

To say the least

He saw wonho from Monsta X and he was like

*woah he's hot"

Bisexual reid is cannon stfu 😤

But then he realized how ripped he was

And he's like

Damn

I'm skinny skinny

But he was like

Yeah but they knows him

But

They're dating ME

Que dramatic hair flip

And he kept flipping and he was like

My baby knows so many people wow

So he put that off to the side

And kept looking

And then hoe found the lightstick

HE THOUGHT IT WAS A VIBRATOR

SO HE WAS LIKE

"Uuuuhhhhhhhh-" While shoving it back into the box

And then he saw the albums and he was like

He didn't open them though

NCT???

Maybe a cult or smth

2 times????

Twice

Lost children????

Stray kids Spence honey please focus

Isn't red velvet a cake flavor

Peekaboo is a game

Love talk???

So he looked it up

Big mistakes

Why?

Because the song he looked up

Was LOVE TALK BY WAYV

If you don't know the song

Lmfao how'd you get this far

Some of the songs very colorful lyrics include

"Touch me, tease me, feel me up" WayV, 2019

Spence was

To say the least

Very flustered

And ya boy was like

Wtfwtfwtf

Who are these people

My so knows famous people

Uhhh

And has a photo album of them

Umm

I'm proud ig???

And so you walk out

And you're kinda like

Surprised Pikachu

When you see him

With the box open

And you both look at each other and he goes

"It's actually more common to meet a celebrity when you don't actually know who they are"

And you start WHEEZING

And he's like

Huh

And you're like

"Did you think I know all those people???"

And he's like

"Well yeah you have a very well put photo album of their selfies and they're albums and I recognize two of them from the back and wallpaper of your phone the night we met"

And you explain

Kpop

Biases

And all that stuff

And he's like

"So what's that green vibrator thing?"

And you're like????

Then he motions to the lightstick and you laugh once again

And you're like

"We bang those around at concerts to show love and stuff"

And so you go on

With life

And you guys even end up going to a concert together

It's an ateez concert

And he's very surprised when the crowd yells

"Bad bitch Puerto Rican" Out of nowhere

And at the office he's even funnier

"Did you know there's a Korean boy group with 21 men in it? They're called NCT, neo culture technology and-"

AND JJ IS LIKE

"what the hell is he talking about"

And Penelope's like

"Yn why must you do this"

And you're like

"He figured it out on his own ok he opened my box 😤"

LMFAO WHAT GOES THROUGH MY BRAIN

Also!!! My requests are open and I only do bullet stories!!!!

[one-spidey-boii]

BUMMER SUMMER || peter parker; ch three

read ch two here

masterlist

an; heya, happy friday. :)

**italics indicates flashback**

warnings; mentions of battle wounds (i.e. blood/scars/etc), future smut, mature language, fluff, angst, both peter and oc are 18+!!

word count; 2.6k+

edie's pov

pulling up to the compound is nerve-wracking, to say the least. this place is the home of so many valuable items and pieces of technology. to be put in charge of those things is something i don't take lightly. i just hope to make tony proud.

we pull into the underground garage and he helps me take my bags out of the backseat. he goes to pick up my weapons bag and stumbles when he lifts it.

"oh- damn. this thing is heavy. what do you have in here? rocks?" he questions with a chuckle to throw me off the obvious fact he’s struggling. i grab the bag from him and sling it around my shoulder with ease.

"it's just all of my knives, a few throwing stars, my suit, some-" i begin to say but he cuts me off.

"okay okay, stop that. it was rhetorical. get in the building." he leads me to the fingerprint password protected door. "give me your thumb." he demands.

i stretch my hand out to him as he grabs my thumb and presses it against the touchscreen pad that was next to the door. after touching a few buttons and scanning my thumb, he continues, "there ya go. you now have access to almost every room in the compound. don't be stupid with it." he pointes a finger at me playfully.

with that i nod and follow him into the compound and up the stairs that take us to the main level. he gives me a quick tour of the place and makes a point to remind me of all the things i'm not allowed to touch.

finally, we stop in front of a cream-colored door and he turns around to face me.

"here's your room. do with it what you want," he says with a smile and steps out of my way. i open the door to a completely white room with white walls and bedspread and curtains and-

"i figured i'd leave you a blank slate so that you could...i don't know, be creative?" he explains, "okay, see ya. i'll give you a holler when the kid gets here."

peter's pov

aunt may had just finished hugging me to death when i hear a honk from the street below us. i squirm away from her arms and grab her hands.

"may, i gotta go now. i'll see you soon." i say with a sad smile, knowing she’ll be miserable wondering if i’m okay every second of the day. she nods at me and mouthes 'i love you' as i slip out the apartment door.

happy sits in the car, anxious to get going as i scramble to get everything in the trunk. i slam it shut and make my way to the passenger seat. as soon as i grab the handle, the door locks and happy gave me a stern look as he rolls the window down to speak.

"no way, in the back," he says as he nods to the back seat with his head. i try to argue but he’s already rolling the window back up. i groan while hopping into the back seat and put my headphones in before resting my head against the window.

-

once we reach the compound, happy parks the car and begins to make his way to the door, leaving me to get all my bags. he tells me to hurry up with a small smile on his face, which tells me he’s just messing with me.

he still makes me carry it all myself though.

i practically trip in the doorway and all my things fall to the ground. mr. stark appears in front of me with a smug look and his arms behind his back.

"glad you could make it, parker. don't worry about the bags, happy will get them," he says as he turns and begins walking away. i notice happy out of the corner of my eye and stick my tongue out at him teasingly. he gives me a dirty look.

mr. stark pulls me out of my antics as he clears his throat. i whirl around to look at him and offer a sheepish smile.

"okay, kid. let's get down to business," he says but before he can continue, i rush to speak, unable to contain myself anymore.

"where should i sleep? do you even want me to sleep? considering i have to be alert to take out the bad guys? hey, can i bring my friend ned over some time? or could i get a dog? it's probably gonna get a little lonely here." i spew out with one big breath.

mr. stark gives me a weird stare before a look of realization crosses his face. "oh. oh. i didn't tell you, did i?" he asks as if he's surprised he let this information slip his mind. i cock my head at him as a sign to continue.

"you're not doing this alone. i recruited someone else to stay here too," he says with a serious face. my own face falls at his words. of course he didn't trust me enough to leave me here alone. he probably got some old person friend to keep an eye on me and tell me what to do. i have to admit though, the idea of not having to be here for three months all by myself is kinda nice.

"hey now, don't jump to conclusions. it's not some old person." he continues on with a smirk. i swear he can read minds. i walk over to the couch and throw myself onto it face first. "in fact, i think you might like her. wolfie, come on in." he calls through the room.

my ears perk at the sound of my best friend's nickname, but immediately push it aside when i remember she left for that summer camp this morning. and she also isn't the type of person tony stark would ask to protect his compound. i don't even think he knows who she is.

soft footsteps make their way into the living room, along with an off-key voice singing the spiderman theme song. i raise my head off the couch to catch a glance at the owner of the poor singing voice.

"spiderman, spiderman, does what ever a spid- peter?"

oh shit.

-

edie's pov.

hell no. no part of my body is willing to accept what i am witnessing in front of me. not only am i pissed off that i've never been told about this not-so-little secret—the one that means my best friend is the spiderman- but this bitch decided to lie to me about this whole entire summer, thinking he could just 'go on vacation.'

"what the heck, edie?" peter yells as he flings himself up from the couch. "this isn't summer camp! what are you doing here?" he asks while flailing his arms in the air.

his angry face is a shock to me. i’ve never seen my best friend get so worked up about anything before. it takes me a second before i can regain my composure. and then i just get mad.

"me? what are you doing here, parker?" i shout back at him with the same amount of energy and annoyance. i take a few steps into the room and towards him before a hand is placed on my shoulder.

"okay, yeah, i know that look. why don't you stop right there, kid." tony says as he steps in between peter and i.

"sorry, mr. stark." i say in complete unison with another voice. my head snaps back to peter and my mouth falls open in disbelief.

"hey, hey, hey, he was talking to me." i say with a pointed finger at peter's chest.

"no. no, no. he calls me kid." he replies with a pout.

tony rolls his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose, "you're both children, especially at this very moment. there, are you happy?"

peter and i look at each other with fire in our eyes. his expression falters for a second before he regains his anger. i try to search for what the other emotion was, but can't find anything behind his stern gaze.

"let's just take a seat, okay? how about that?" tony continues and leads us to the couch.

i plop myself onto the couch with a huff and cross my arms over my chest. peter sits down on the complete opposite end, mirroring my expression. tony takes a seat on the coffee table in front of us.

"i really thought you guys would be more excited, seeing as you are best friends." tony says with a smirk.

peter looks at me and back at tony, "wait you knew that we know each other?" he says and straightens his posture a little bit.

"clearly you guys don't know each other as well as you thought." tony snickers, "listen, you're both here for a reason. hash it out and come find me later."

with that he stands up, gives us each a pat on the head and strolls off to who knows where.

peter and i both watch him walk away, focusing on mr. stark's retreating frame for as long as we can before it turns weird. i slowly shift my head to face forward, too stubborn to make the first move. and of course, peter being the good guy he is, begins to talk.

"what's going on, e?" he asks softly. i keep my gaze forward and fiddle with my fingers. he turns his body to face mine and waits for an answer.

this was all just a big clusterfuck. i'm furious with peter. for lying and for feeling like he can't tell me something so important to him. but i'm one to talk, i guess. how can i be mad when i've done the exact same thing to him?

i'm pulled out of my thoughts when peter's finger pokes me on the side of my face. i swat his hand away and force myself to look at him.

"i'm sorry." i whisper.

peter softens at that and returns my gesture, "me too."

after a few seconds, i continue, "who knew my best friend was the amazing spiderman?" i say with a small chuckle. he gives me a smile and shrugs his shoulders.

"i guess i am pretty amazing." he gloats. we both laugh and then return to silence.

i know he's going to ask about me and what capabilities i have that make me worthy of being here. to be honest, i’ve always been confident in my abilities, until now. we all know why peter is here. he has heightened reflexes and healing. he can shoot actual webs from his fancy wrist bands and scale buildings and swing from place to place.

i, however, can do none of those superhuman things. i'm just good at throwing sharp objects. but if that's enough for tony stark to take me under his wing then i guess i have nothing to worry about. right?

i decide to answer the question looming over his head and stand up from the couch. i stick out my hand for him to take and gesture for him to get up.

"wanna see some of my tricks?" i chirp. he smiles and takes my hand.

but before we can go anywhere, i grab his arm and flip his body over my head, making him slap the ground hard with his back. he lands with a grunt and looks up at me with shock. i double over with laughter and poke fun at the flustered boy.

"i'm sorry, i'm sorry. let me help you up." i choke out between laughs and grab his outstretched hand. with one heave i pull him up onto his feet with ease, which seemed to surprise him more.

"you're...weirdly strong," he comments with an uneasy look on his face. i just shrug and turn to go grab my goodie bag from my room.

-

peter's pov.

i find myself standing in the training room, practicing my dodges and agility as i wait for edie to come back with her things. i'm trying to keep my head clear and thoughts open.

i have to admit, all of this is just a tad overwhelming. figuring out i'm not going to be here alone, and the person i'm going to be spending my summer with is my best friend— who is badass enough to flip me over her shoulder? i mean, i knew she was great, but this is, well, unexpected.

as far as the lies go, there's nothing i can do about that. i’m calling it all even at this point.

footsteps enter the room and stop abruptly. "why are you wearing your suit?" a voice sounds off behind me.

i flip around and stare at edie, who is dressed in workout clothes. i glance down at myself and shrug playfully.

"it's the first time you get to see spiderman and know who's underneath the mask." i say as i do a princess twirl in front of her. "where's your fancy getup?"

she huffs and drops a bag onto the ground with a loud thud. with curiosity taking over my thoughts, i walk over to her and poke around at her bag.

"hey, what's in here-? ow!" i exclaim as i rub the back of my head. "why'd you do that?"

"i'll put my suit on if you stop trying to touch my stuff." edie responds as she tries to hide a smile.

i flop onto my back and nod, albeit a little defeated. she rustles around in her bag before leaving the room.

i stare at the ceiling, sprawled out across the floor. i can't help but smile to myself at the thought of this summer. staying in the avengers compound with edie is something i could have never thought up myself. yet here we are, feeling all happy and cheesy like a bad movie.

"okay, parker. let's do this."

i push myself to my feet and almost choke when i see edie standing in front of me. the suit she has on is completely black and slim-fitting and she looks good. i can only dream that that's how i look in my suit. like that, but yanno, manly.

then it dawns on me. i've seen a girl in this suit before. the other night, with those three guys. and she kicked their assess. i have to admit, i'm even more proud to call her my best friend after seeing that.

"so you're the knife girl, huh?" i tease. she mocks me with a laugh and in an instant, she's pulling two knives out of her waistband and chucks one at me with no hesitation.

i shoot a web up to the rafters in the ceiling and swing out of the way of her attack.

"ha ha. missed me, missed me, now you gotta ki- woah!" i try to tease her but she's already flinging her second knife at me. with a last-minute dodge, i turn around to see the knife an inch from my head.

"if i wanted to hit you, i would have." edie taunts with a smirk.

i smile at the girl on the ground below me, thankful she can't see my giddy face underneath the mask. i hop down to her level and cross my arms, "so you obviously don't like 'knife girl'. do you even have a cool superhero name, wolfie?"

she seems to be stuck in thought for a moment before answering me with a shrug, "i'm sure i can come up with something better than spiderman."

|| wanna be on the taglist? drop a comment y’all

taglist; @my-patronus-is-mabel-pines

[physcoticfrog]

Part 16, Boba shop; take 2

Small thing (a/n): I know, right now it seems more written than social media, but I feel like it's really necessary in order for me to get all the details in. Social media makes it really difficult to set a storyline and to get in essential details. (Also the little circle thing means it didn't send, idk why it looks like that tho)

[The text message is seen through Daichi's pov]

(y/n's pov)

As you walked into the boba shop, all the nerves came rushing in. What if she didn't come today? What if she didn't recognize you? What if she hated you because you never came back? All of these questions were haunting you, but your thoughts were interrupted when a voice spoke.

"Hello, how may I help you today?" The cashier lady asked. You thought for a moment. Do you want a regular strawberry, or do you want a chocolate banana smoothie with the boba?

You made up your mind, and quickly ordered, "May I please get a strawberry yogurt boba?" You asked, as polite as you could.

"Of course, will that be all?" She asked, and the usual process of ordering and receiving the drink.

When you made your way to your seat, you made sure to sit at the nearest table to the door, and chose the chair that was facing the door.

And you waited, maybe 30 minutes. And that's when you saw her walk up to the window. She was still beautiful as ever, wearing a black halter-top crop top. Her jeans were black and ripped, while she wore black combat boots. It was all black, but for some reason it looked bright on her. She had chains all around her neck, but they were silver and gold, having all different kinds of patterns and charms. She had tattoos too, ranging from a tiny star, to big black wings on her back. Her hair was probably the only not black thing on her, it was a subtle dirty blonde, with some parts being brighter than the other.

You knew it was natural, because she said she hated hair dye, and that was how it was when you were a kid.

It was after she ordered and got her drink that she saw you. You could tell she recognized you because of the look that crossed her eyes. It was a mix of longing, sadness, happiness, a huge mix of emotions.

She stared. Soon, she muttered out a "Y-y/n... No way." You could hear how her voice broke.

All you could do was nod your head, and you hugged her. You both held on so tight, like you were afraid it would be the last time, because when you were kids, you never thought of it.

"God, I missed you so much. I saw you the other day, but I couldn't bring myself to talk to you." You felt like you were gonna cry, because it felt so good to be able to have someone you trusted so much hold you again.

"Why did you have to go? I missed you so goddamn much y/n." She sounded sad, but stern.

"I know, I missed you too Aiko. I didn't want to leave, but I had to." You hated that. She was someone you could confide in, and it felt like home, but it hurt so much to say.

She pulled away from the hug, and asked "Can I sit down? I want to be able to talk for a bit longer." Of course you nodded your head in a agreement.

"Has life treated you well? How far have you managed to get?" She sounded genuinely curious, a smile gracing her features.

"Yeah actually. I managed to get pretty good at volleyball, I met some really amazing people. A family, a real family, adopted me." You laughed, finding it crazy how much your life had truly changed. But quickly frowned when you looked at your wrist. You would be able to get your cast off next week, but it still sucked that it even happened.

"Y/n.. what happened to your wrist?" She now sounded concerned. You had almost forgotten how much emotion seeps into her voice when she talks.

"I.. I broke my wrist. Shattered it. I messed up a receive from a crazy good spiker." But, you smiled, remembering the ones you successfully received. "But, luckily I get it off next week and I can get cleared to practice again."

"That's good. How'd your team react to it?"

"Well.. funny story actually.. I got kicked off the team. Which made no sense, since I was number one for first year's girls and could bring up their reputation. BUT, their loss." You shrugged it off. You had gotten over it, and figured out it truly is their own loss.

"Damn. How are you playing or practicing then?" She asked. You could hear how she was utterly confused.

"I've been practicing with the boys team. My adoptive brother actually plays for them." You stated. You were kinda proud, being able to be a girl on a team that was slowly starting to climb it's way to being a powerhouse school.

"That's really cool. Have you made any good friends?"

"Yeah actually. Two boys I went to middle school with, and went to highschool with last year. They've kinda become my best friends." Aiko's face seemed to morph, but she quickly tried to hide it. "What?"

"Nothing.. It's just that I hate that I'm not really your best friend anymore and I can't be there for you."

"You act like that's your fault?"

She stayed silent. Aiko didn't know how to answer you. You were right, and she didn't know why she was so angry.

"Here, I should probably get going, so I'll give you my number. I want to know more about how you're doing now too, but my brother is waiting for me at home." So, you did. You gave her your phone number, said your goodbyes, hugged one last time, and left to go home.

You turned your phone back on, and pulled up your messages. You cringed at what your eyes were met with.

Masterlist

Last next

Taglist:

@cuddlesslut @90s-belladonna @anhphunnnn

[ltleflrt]

YAY!!! I'm so greedy for your writing... Coworker & Immortal AU, Please and thank you

I’m kinda stretching the definition of coworkers here, but in the eyes of an Immortal, human definitions are probably fleeting anyway :)

Warning for people dying.

Little fingers press against Dean’s palm, and he gives them a reassuring squeeze as he watches the heartbreak spread across the faces of the nurses as the doctor calls time of death.  The soft crying of the witnesses turns into broken sobs that make even Dean’s ancient heart squeeze painfully.  

“Will they be sad for a long time?”

Dean looks down at the spirit of the child gripping his hand.  In the last days of her life, her body was thin, and ravaged by sores.  In death, she’s beautiful, practically glowing with the the power of a young soul that hasn’t dimmed from a long lifetime of use.  “They might,” he answers honestly.  “But not forever.”

“I wish I could tell them I feel better now.”  Her large brown eyes swim with metaphysical tears as she watches her parents mourn.

He smiles at her.  What a gentle heart.  Many children make wishes when they pass from the world of the living.  Sometimes they don’t want to leave, and they wish to go back.  Some wish they could see a beloved pet again, or say goodbye to their friends.  A large number of them wish they could take their toys with them, which always delights Dean.

If he had the power to grant wishes, the ones made on behalf of their lost loved ones are the wishes he’d be most eager to fulfill.  Alas, he’s the embodiment of Death, not a Djinn.  “I wish you could too.”

She heaves a sigh that expresses a knowledge only gained by death.  “Thanks.” She gives him a watery smile.  “So what’s next?”

“You have a journey to make,” Dean says.

“Like Dora the Explorer?”

He laughs at her sudden excitement.  “Yes, just like that.”

She bounces on her toes when he introduces her to the Reaper assigned to lead her to her next destination.  Only once does she look back, waving goodbye to him and to her parents who have yet to come to terms with the sudden termination of her short life.  Then she fades away, her spirit absorbed into the larger fabric of the Universe.

“I’d feel more sorry for them if they weren’t anti-vaxxers,” Sam says from nearby.  “How many of the other kids here do you think might be dying because their daughter was patient zero at her school?”

“All of them,” Dean answers.  He spares a glance for the mourning parents, and grimaces.  Crowley’s anti-vax movement has been very effective.  

He always does his best work using misinformation rather than spreading actual plagues.  Even the Black Death became the massive killing machine that it did because he’d convinced people that cats were The Devil’s creatures.  So many cats were wiped out, they could no longer keep up with the plague carrying rats infesting human cities.  Crowley was quite proud of that one.

That many falling to him at once was overwhelming.  He and his reapers had been overworked, and he’d been pretty pissed about it.  Especially since each death had been so intensely miserable.  Dean is neutral to death because everyone succumbs to it eventually, but that doesn’t mean he condones such cruel methods.  

Which means it’s time to intervene.  “Crowley.”  He feels the other horseman’s presence fill the hospital before it condenses down into the form of a small man in a tailored suit.  

“You called?” Crowley asks in his crisp British accent.  It’s an affect; Crowley has existed since before English started stealing words from other languages, and long before the most ancient forms of verbal communication.

“You’ve made your mark here,” Dean says.  “It’s time to lift your touch from this town.”

Crowley scoffs.  “Only 9 have been infected.  I’ve barely started--”

“It’s enough,” Dean commands sharply.  “The Fates have other plans for these people, and you’ve already interfered with their work enough.”

“Fine,” Crowley drawls, clearly unhappy with the order but unwilling to go against one of the few beings that has the power to demote him from demi-god to corpse.  “I’ve got some mosquito populations to check on.” He smiles tightly. “Can’t let all the rainforest loggers get off without a touch of Malaria.”

He’s not asking for permission, but Dean tips his head in acknowledgement anyway.  It isn’t his goal to anger the spirit of Pestilence, only to maintain a balance.  “I’ll send some Reapers with you.”

That perks Crowley up, because it means that his victims won’t survive the disease.  “Splendid.  See you around, Boss.” He nods to the gaunt shadow at Dean’s elbow.  “You too, Sam.”

He disappears before either of them can respond.  

“He’s such a bag of dicks,” Sam sighs.  

“No shit,” Dean agrees.  “Good at this job though.”

Sam makes a noncommittal sound.  His eyes follow the spirits being led to their next destination by Dean’s reapers.  

A tug behind Dean’s sternum pulls his attention across the country.  His lover rarely summons him so urgently, so Dean sets aside his current plans to see what Castiel needs.  “I’m needed elsewhere,” he says out loud, sending the message to all the local Reapers.

“Dean,” Sam says softly.  “Please.  You summoned me here for a reason.”

“I did.  I’m sorry I forgot.” Dean grimaces and rubs a hand over Sam’s shoulder.  “There’s a janitor downstairs.  He’s been sneaking into patients rooms that he has no business in.”

Sam’s eyes darken with greed.  “A damaged soul?”

“Let’s just say that he’s worse for children than measles,” Dean says.  “He’s scheduled to slip and crack his head open in a few hours.  I’ve instructed my Reapers to leave him to you.”

“I appreciate it.”

Dean pats him again, and hopes the touch conveys how proud his of Sam’s current restraint.  He knows how difficult it is for him, being the only horseman who suffers when he doesn’t use his powers.  An eternity of addiction and starvation is a punishment he doesn’t deserve, and Dean would shoulder that pain for him if it were within his powers.  But he can only settle for helping Sam maintain his balance, by making sure he feeds often enough that he stays strong enough to keep his powers reined in.

The love and gratitude in his brother’s eyes tells him that Sam knows.  It’s enough for now.

They say their goodbyes and Dean spreads the great shadow of his wings.  In the scope of the universe Earth is miniscule and it takes barely half a flap to reach his destination.  He stretches them wide before folding them back into his essence, and looks around.  

The Oval Office is dark, the current president not the type to stay up late worrying about matters of state.  But there is still a figure slumped in the chair behind the huge desk.  A smile tugs at the corners of Dean’s mouth when his eyes fall on his lover.  “I thought you’d given up stealing thrones.”

Castiel huffs a soft laugh.  “I’ve been given more thrones than I stole.”

“Hmm, my mistake.” Dean walks around the desk, and when Castiel swivels the chair to face him, he straddles his thighs and anchors himself in place with arms wrapped around Castiel’s shoulders.

Their lips meet in a kiss that is mostly greeting, with a tiny lick of heat.  Even after eons, the passion driving their relationship has hardly dimmed.  But Dean can sense that Castiel needs him for more than a quick fuck over the desk.  There’s a different need emanating from his skin.

Dean tilts his head until their foreheads bump.  “What’s wrong, Cas?”

Castiel’s sigh warms the space between them.  “I’m finding it very difficult to maintain the balance.  Between the rise of despots with a hunger for nuclear weapons, and dictators draping themselves in the flag of democracy whipping up their most frenzied followers into violence, I find myself very busy for how little actual battle these humans participate in.”

“I’ve noticed.” Dean doesn’t offer platitudes or advice.  War is Castiel’s domain, not his.  And often, Castiel just needs a sympathetic ear, which Dean is qualified to provide.

“I miss the Cold War,” Castiel grumbles.

Dean laughs.  “Bullshit.  You were tearing your hair out trying to get someone to push the big button.”

Castiel’s icy glare could drop a human on the spot, dead of heart failure.  Dean just thinks it’s adorable.  “Don’t be ridiculous.  Wiping out all of humanity would render me obsolete.”

“You still wanted to see it happen though,” Dean counters with a grin.

“I’ve seen civilizations wiped out by supernovae.”

“But that was my work.” Dean wiggles in Castiel’s lap. “It’s not the same.”

Castiel huffs his annoyance and wraps his arms tightly around Dean’s hips, holding him still.  He presses his face into Dean’s chest.  “Please don’t mock me.”

Dean sobers, and runs fingers through Castiel’s hair.  Sometimes he can pull Castiel out of his existential funks with a little teasing, but this is apparently not one of those times.  “Talk to me, Cas.”

“Maybe I am just God’s Hammer.” His voice is muffled by Dean’s shirt.  “And this battle against my baser nature has only one inevitable end.”

“You wouldn’t have these doubts if that were true.” Dean refrains from pointing out that these internal ‘battles’ are part of his nature as a god of War.  It’s a lesson Castiel will eventually learn on his own.  As the youngest of the horsemen he still has a long life of learning ahead of him.    

Castiel hums and nuzzles closer.  “Tell me of your doubts.”

“I set my Reapers on a hospital full of kids with measles today,” Dean says.  “And I’m not seeing that trend stopping any time soon.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s the nature of the job.”

“Still.” Castiel lifts his head and looks up at Dean with kindness and understanding.  “I know you don’t enjoy when your touch lands on children.”

He doesn’t enjoy any aspect of his job.  Okay, maybe he enjoys feeding the souls of the truly terrible to his little brother sometimes.  But being the instrument of entropy in the universe isn’t exactly fun, even if he knows that there’s no other way it can function.

“Yeah,” he says.  “It always sucks.  But none of our jobs are exactly easy.”

“Crowley seems to enjoy himself.”

“He’s a bag of dicks.”

Castiel laughs and pushes his face against Dean’s chest.  “I wonder if this is what a mid life crisis feels like.”

He’s nowhere near the midpoint of his life, but Dean can’t--won’t--tell him that.  “Is that what’s going on?”

“Well I’m very old,” Castiel says dryly.  “I believe I’m entitled.”

“Pfft.” Dean flicks a finger against the collar of Castiel’s current favorite outfit.  “You’re just a baby in a trench coat.”

“I watched the first fish crawl from the ocean, Dean.”

“I’m literally older than dirt,” Dean counters.  “And molecules.”

Castiel’s essense brightens, and Dean knows that he’s finally broken through the shell of his bad mood.  “Dirty old man.”

“You make me young.”  Dean nudges Castiel’s chin, forcing him out of hiding.  He presses a kiss to Castiel’s forehead and then another to his lips.  “My existence started with yours.”

It’s sappy as fuck, but as much as he loves his brother, and occasionally enjoys Crowley’s antics, his heart finally found true joy when Castiel joined their ranks.  

“You are not a Hammer,” he continues.  He cups his hands around Castiel’s face so he can’t look away, and strokes his thumbs across Castiel’s cheekbones.  “You are a Weaver.  Spiders would cry in awe if they could conceive the delicate webs you create.  You weave nets to contain and stabilize the balance of the universe.”  

He kisses Castiel again, nudging until lips part under his own.  He’s rewarded with a moan, and Castiel tilts his head, leaning into Dean’s touch.  Castiel kisses like he’s trying to win a battle, but Dean calms him with his touch, keeping the passion at a simmer instead of letting it turn into an inferno.  When he finally lifts his head, Castiel blinks dazedly up at him.

“Dean,” Castiel whispers.  “I am a creature of destruction.  I don’t--”

“You are an creature of peace as well as war,” Dean whispers.  “Balance.”

Castiel closes his eyes, and settles under Dean’s touch.  “Sometimes I internalize the vision humans have of me.  Thank you for reminding me that there’s more to me than violence and death.”

“I’ll always be here for you. As leader, and lover.” Dean peppers more kisses over Castiel’s face.  “Until Time itself fades, and I reap the last vestiges of the universe.”

“Thank you.” Castiel stays pliant under Dean’s touch, and he smiles.  “And I love you too.”

Dean pecks him right on the lips again.  “Existential crisis averted?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“Good,” Dean says brightly.  “Now what do you say to desecrating this desk?”

Castiel surges to his feet, carrying Dean’s weight with him and depositing it on the polished surface.  “There’s nothing holy about this desk.”

Dean is already tugging at Castiel’s clothing.  They could dismiss it with a thought, but they’ve both spent far too long with humanity, and enjoy the trappings of physicality.  “It’ll be the most holy, after I make you see god tonight.”

“We’ll see who’s crying for god’s mercy when I’m through with you,” Castiel growls.

Dean laughs and allows himself to be pushed flat.  He already knows they’re both going to win.

[artdecielle]

Hello, i know this might be too personal, so i totally understand if you decide not to answer, but since I'm questioning myself I was wondering how did you figure out you were asexual?? I'm confuseddd and have limited romantic/sexual experience so I'm just kinda winging it. Halp

Hello, nonny!

First of all, I am sorry it took me so long to respond. It took me a while to figure out how to answer your ask. Not because it’s too personal, but because I wanted to give a good answer. After a while and a lot of drafts and attempts to explain, I had to accept that I don’t have a good, simple answer; what I do have--and what I can give you--is an honest answer. When I was trying to figure out my sexuality, all I wanted was someone to ask. I’m happy I can be that for you, and I hope my answer is helpful (even if it is a bit long and convoluted).

The shortest way to answer your question of how I figured out that I’m asexual is that I didn’t. The first time I heard about asexuality was when my friend asked "are you asexual?" This was during a conversation where I basically described that I didn't feel sexual attraction. I didn't know that's what I was describing at the time, though. I didn’t know there was anything different about my experience from my allosexual friends. Mostly because I didn’t have a whole lot of experience to talk about (in action or attraction). But the biggest reason I didn’t realize was because I didn’t know asexuality was a thing. I thought sexual attraction was the same as romantic and aesthetic attraction because those were things I had experienced. So I thought I was having a pretty “normal” romantic + sexual experience, and didn’t have any reason to question or explore my sexuality. 

Obviously, that didn’t last.

Anyway, back to the story, when my friend asked "are you asexual?" I told her I wasn't because a) I didn't know what that meant and b) was afraid to ask. 

I did eventually look it up and promptly decided to ignore it. I was Big Time overwhelmed by the sudden revelation that I might not be straight. But I couldn't ignore it forever. Once you know something you can't unknow it. To be fair to my past self, I was trying to graduate and find a job and apply for grad school and figure out what I was going to do with my life so, like. Having a sexuality crisis was not on.

The process I went through for my asexual discovery (once I was done panicking) is long and probably not that interesting, but it involved lots of those "what's your sexuality quizzes" (always came back with some variation of ace-spec), setting up profiles on dating sites (in a misguided attempt at "proving" to myself that I did experience sexual attraction), and general anxiety about how the hell to figure out what sexual attraction actually is.

Anyway. It’s hard to say when and how I knew I’m asexual. I wish I could say "I knew from the moment I understood what asexuality is". I probably should have known from around age 14. In hindsight it's obvious, because now I understand what I was feeling back then and was unable to express. (E.g. Getting crushes and wanting dates but being unenthused/nervous about sex).The journey from ignorance to acceptance was filled with a lot of doubt and denial and confusion. I struggled with it for a long time; I was frightened, and sad, and feeling terribly lost and alone.

Long story short...I don't think I ever had a dawning moment of clarity. I just kept researching and reading and taking quizzes, hoping something would click. The most helpful thing I read was a description of sexual attraction. It said when you feel it, you'll know (unhelpful). And if you have to ask what it feels like, you probably haven't felt it (helpful).

I had done nothing but ask what it was for months. I still didn't know. So I just kind of shrugged and said welp! Guess I'm asexual, or aspec. I decided if something happened to change my mind, so be it, but pretending to be allosexual was making me miserable, and the only one who could save me from that misery was me. It wasn't really all that revolutionary, after all. I hadn't changed, only my understanding of who I am.

What I wish I had known back then is that labels are only as useful as you find them. They normalize a common experience and create community. But you don't have to keep any label that doesn't suit you. It's not as though you can only come out as One Thing, One Time. Identity is confusing no matter who you are. Our experiences are unique to each individual, and not only is that fine, it's good! 

If you like, you can do as I did and try out IDing as ace/acespec for a while to see how it feels. A branch to rest on, so to speak, until you decide whether you want to build a nest or keep flying. You can leave even a label and come back to it later. There's no sexuality police what's gonna come and make sure you're "ace enough" or anything like that. The ace community is welcoming, and whether you decide to stay or just stop by, we're pleased to offer you friendship and stability to figure yourself out.

It's also fine to not have experience. You don't need it to know, despite what people might say. You can even be ace and still enjoy sexual activities. Action and attraction are separate things. The good thing (and sometimes the scary thing) is that no one can decide your sexuality for you.

It's brave to ask questions and explore! Be proud of that. I'm proud of you ❤❤❤ I hope I was able to help a little bit, if only to confirm that it's all very confusing and complicated. If you have any questions, I'm here for you. Bon courage!!

[jocy-diaries]

04.08.2022

I think I just don't like writing my diary entries on this phone because this is the phone I do everything else on you know? Big sigh. But anyways~

On Wednesday I made some dinner for my sister and I, Dumplings for her, and I really wanted Okra thanks to the lovely Imamuroom so I decided to get so frozen Okra and make a really simple stir fry. I wasn't expecting it to be good because it was frozen Okra instead of fresh and the last time mom made it it was...bad. it wasn't good. So I was expecting the same thing. And honestly I don't know what mom did but when I made it it was *delicious*. Cannot wait to finish that little meal.

On Thursday I ended work early because honestly. I had been working until 7pm the entire week and waking up early and I'm TIRED OF IT. So I ended early and chilled with my sister~ Then we went to watch Sonic 2!! I had a Tito Mule drink which was the first mixed drink I've had since forever. God I miss mixed drinks but I don't know how to make them myself. It was delicious. And honestly the movie was so great. A lot of fun, and everyone was excited for the third movie they previewed. It looks great. I hope we get to see Amy, I'm so excited for her. Also, I hope they get to keep Jim Carey because he's honestly great as Dr. Eggman.

Now today is finally Friday. I'm so tired. I've been waking up exhausted eventhough I sleep more than eight hours now than to the Melatonin gummies. And my focus is still shot so I might need to get something for adhd again. But honestly, I've been remembering stuff and daily admin tasks pretty well! I'm proud of myself for that. I got my dog's appointments set up as well as my sister's appointments. Plus I'm getting things continued for the Italy trip and SJSU, although now I might consider doing my mlis abroad in 2023. It seems...better? Maybe.

Also it's been super rainy and foggy all week, and just yesterday things started looking sunny again~ I can say that I love Spring because of how it reminds me of the beach in Africa. Sunny with a light wind and the trees swaying~ I love that sound. I also love the sound of rain on a tin or metal roof because of grandma's house~

Now I'm looking forward to my DnD sessions tonight and tomorrow (and Sunday ig) and in Sunday I'll be driving with my sister to Helen GA and then a little farmers shop~ Very excited for that. We'll have to leave kinda early so I'm hoping we also get to stop by the library meeting place for coffee and breakfast.

My mother wants me to save more money and be more conscious of it and like, I agree, but at the same time it's like. You expect me to be alive alive a while, don't you? I can't think of a good reason to not spend money when I want to on the things I want because I could be dead tomorrow, you know? I think I need to invest in rental properties or air bnbs or something just so I can put THAT money in savings and spend the rest of my money however I want.

So DnD tonight~ And ohmygosh. NEBATI GOT CLOAK OF WINGS!!!! That (and brooch if shielding) was honestly the last thing I wanted her to get to complete her look!! I'm so glad she found one. Now she has white wings to act like an angel for her goddess~ Unfortunately...she failed every saving throw after that :,) But she got to train fight with her friends which she really enjoyed (eventhough she got taken out Round two lol) Also volunteered at the library and it went well~ A patron brought in a jar of flowers which was just GORGEOUS And I got some books and Barbie movies for next weekend since the library is closed. Gotta figure out something to do for Easter...

And...my gosh. Yall. I got asked to be in a one shot!! Someone said they WANT to DM for me! I'm not used to being someone who people want to be around or talk to, so this is. Such a pleasant shock. I'm really grateful I stayed in this campaign~ Plus the DM for the Saturday group said that I fit in well with the group so I'm just. I'm getting so many good points. Now I really think I'll get a subscription to dnd beyond and read through all of the books. Especially since people want to play with me! :D I'm gonna add them all as friends on Discord after all!! I was scared of doing that but now I will >:3c

[cloverly-ponies]

Sorry for the OOC ask, but... I'm struggling with pony names!! How do you get a 'ponysona' to be so perfect and all encompassing... when I make one, I'm happy with it, then stress that it isn't FULLY me... I can't get one I'm happy with. ;o;

DON’T APOLOGIZE, peeps don’t worry I’m just here enjoying my ponies I’ll worry about polish later when I’m physically capable of it. Right now we’re just all having a good time, talking about ponies, building up lore and worlds around them. This is a perfect question to hoof around with.

Let me answer flat out. I have no idea, Starcrossed was drawn on a goofy whim then never... changed. She’s just been exactly perfect for my personal sona and I could not be happier. SINCE I DON’T HAVE A GOOD ANSWER, WE’LL JUST REVIEW MY PROCESS! That way maybe you can try my tricks and see if you can’t find good ways to name up your ponies.

I’ve been... typing a lot lately. So as a precaution I’m going to put the rest under a read more.

For as long as I can remember, my joke “pony self” has always ALWAYS been a light purple (lilac) pony with bright yellow blonde mane and tail. Never stuck too much with a cutie mark so instead I just put stars on her butt because I have a very personal memory tattooed on my hand.

Here is a doodle I found, not entirely sure how old it is? 2011? Maybe older? I know this more “defined” version of the ponysona came out around 2011 since that’s when the reboot started I think. 

like dang, haha. ponies are hard to draw right? Apparently. Now my whole life I kinda color coded myself with lilac and yellows. I had a lot of bad shit always going on IRL so in my head I wanted to think about anything other than that. What better than ponies? Bright, colorful ponies. (Or whatever fursona I had at the time, always seemed to be purple. lol)

I see a lot of people refer to human skin tones or just flat browns when making sonas - at the time it was popular to draw yourself as a pony nearly everyone I saw did. It irked me a bit as I was stuck living in a horrible reality so I wanted to make sure mine was.. literally the happiest me. But still me. So she was purple. And her eyes were clear blue like I wish mine would be and her mane so bright. But I couldn’t bring myself to totally make her totally happy. I love pegasi the most personally, I think Starcrossed’s biggest dream is to have wings of her own. /clovercanons

But I also knew that because of the life I have lived... I knew I couldn’t have everything I wanted. That was a really huge impact I learned as a small child. So I didn’t give Starcrossed wings. Instead I gave her the loneliness of them. The cravings, the need, the want... To know she was born without, she will never have them. I wanted her to be sad like me, not completely like me my IRL story just sucks. But Starcrossed fantasy version of me could also experience sadness and longing for something. So I gave her longing for wings. Because I myself am limited in so many ways, I have chosen to limit starcrossed as well, and that’s why I picked her to be an earth pony instead of my dreamy pegasi. Despite her being a “happy fantasy” of myself. This anchors her to me on a very deep emotional level.

Next up? What is her true meaning. What does her cutie mark reflect? Now we brushed on that - AJ you literally just gave her your tattoo? Yep. But there is a story behind my tattoo.

As a kid, I frequently was locked out of the house, so instead I’d go and sleep at the park and stargaze in the field. I would stare at them until they were gone or I fell asleep. Something I typically don’t share is that I, like any other child, would make wishes on the stars. For a better life, for better things, for love and safety. I would whisper these wishes into my hand, kiss my knuckle, then “throw” motion at the sky as if I were actually sending my wishes up to be heard by someone, anyone. It’s a habit I did outgrow. But even though I never got help, I never really felt alone so long as I could see the sky. It made me feel small, but wonderful. Like a star in the sky. There are numerous stars yet none are less beautiful than the other. And so, on my 21st birthday, I had a bit of extra cash and I went and got a tattoo on my hand where I use to kiss it. I asked for 3 stars since I typically made wishes in threes. This way even though I couldn’t see the stars in the sky, I carried them with me always. This was my way of trying to convince myself to be strong for myself.

So this obviously got a bit emotional and messy. Who the heck saw this coming for a stupid purple pony amiright? Haha. Starcrossed’s natural “talent” in the mlpverse is Perseverance. Because it doesn’t matter how many times she fails, gets hurt, or falls down. She will always get up again. She will always keep looking up.

(Sorry we made this into Starcrossed’s life story, we’re getting to names now!!!)

Starcrossed got her name simply because... She had stars on her butt. I wasn’t fond of any specific objects or items to think of anything. And anything space/galaxy related didn’t fit either. So I literally sat down at my computer with a note book and wrote down every single-star related name I could think of. Because back then I assumed ponies HAD to  be named after their cutie marks or themes? (obviously now I realize durr of course not??? Why am I putting all these crazy invisible rules on myself???)

But seriously. I just.. googled, and googled, and googled. I checked baby names, I listed any silly items I liked? Pennies, rocks, bottles, flowers. There were 2 categories, first one appealing to her star theme directly and the second category just.. random objects I like, like popcorn?? Just anything you can come up with. Then you google those, then you check the thesaurus and then you check those words and it just.. yanno, link after link. Finally you have this HUGE list of potential names. You just... kinda talk out loud to yourself, try saying the name. See how it feels, do you like how it sounds? Would the character like it? Would the character be excited to hear their name from somepony they knew? Just.. Shrug??? I dunno I get a little TOO into this sometimes I swear.

I was trying to google something for modifying some other name I can’t even remember now and I accidentally got Romeo and Juliet covers, and it just said “STARCROSSED LOVERS” and it hit me. Starcrossed. Fated for each other but never to be? That... felt perfect. For her, for me, for our life. It was perfect. And so it stuck. I never once regretted.

---

✦ SIDE STORY; you peeps gotta notice all my pony names aren’t gold. I mean come on AJ, Bud? Divide? Princess Charming???? Are... you trying? YES I AM I SWEAR - it just took me a while to figure out I don’t have to follow anyone’s rules. My ponies names do NOT have to be canon-like. Take Dusty Lace for example, she despises her name so she FORCES everyone to refer to her only as Miss Lacey. Some of my pony names are perfect; Starcrossed, Smitten Sweets, Mocha Delight, Harvest Tale, these are all names I’m extremely happy with.

But you all want to know who I think my best named pony is? Welp, he’s not my pony even. It’s @provinite‘s ponysona! Providence. I know, how silly. It doesn’t even sound like a real mlpfim name. But that’s okay, it sounds... so perfectly pony and cloverly to me.

His ponysona doesn’t have nearly as deep as a backstory as mine, I literally just asked him what colors he likes so I could draw him as a pony and draw us together, he played along and helped me design it for him! He wanted nice rich greens and golds, very irish feeling. And he wanted his pony to be large size like big mac. The #7 cutie mark just because it’s his favorite number!

Now for me his name was a play - it was suppose to sound and make you think of a province. Like a piece of land or territory. It’s only right now as I googled it did I realize I mistook province and providence as the same word. But... hilariously we’re getting to the point I was going to make. Providence often refers to: Divine providence, divinely ordained events and outcomes. Because my husband, @provinite, is literally one of the biggest influences and saving graces of my life, he is quite literally my divine providence.  (You know that episode where big mac is an alicorn? That’s how starcrossed see’s prov all the time. Capable of anything.)

So the pony names I’m def most proud of stamping to my characters (err his character too) is Starcrossed and Providence.

Oh by the way if none of you guessed yet, Sleepy Star was always an alt sona of mine from Starcrossed only she’s a lot more canon/in-character where as Starcrossed is completely silly and OOC (like pinkie pie and the 4th wall whatever). I literally named her Sleepy star just because I’m always so fucking tired. That’s it. Trust me if you just commit you can pretty much make ANYTHING work for a name. Just put heart into it and enjoy the character building experience!

---

TLDR VERSION: Fuck rules, name ponies whatever the hell you want. Anyone gives you shit for it you send them to me and I’ll show’em. >:C

Make big fat fat fat lists pertaining to anything you know about your pony (OR ANYTHING YOU LIKE IN GENERAL?). Personality, region where they grew up, looks, colors, favorite tastes/smells/things, their job/occupation, things their parents expect of them/want for them, seriously I even just google like phrases and shit and try to compact them if I can. Just... literally go nuts. Use song lyrics, fairy tales, foods and drinks, all sorts of silly stuff you love and want to make a huge part of your ponies life! HAVE FUN!!!

PS this is stupid and long and I’m sorry.